/biz/ - Business & Finance

GAY SEX

Gooooood.

WTFWT

Rate my Roth IRA. Started late April

Would you like a barrel of oil for under $100?

Too bad.

>>50428830
bout tree fiddy/10

lol CNBC

>>50428767
>>50428767
>>50428767
this is the real thread, it has the lower post id.

>>50428830
Stop spamming faggot

Lmao 390 will not be broken

>>50428843
kek

>>50428838
Damn that’s actually pretty good

WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT???

>>50428857
fuck off homo imagine caring this much

>>50428872
At least you haven't lost any money bro

>>50428830
>INTC
>In a Roth

I think I'll use this thread. Haha.

>>50428861
It’s not spamming. I realized I asked in the last thread at 290 replies

>>50428843
good thing she stopped the kid he was chasing. would have been really awkward.

>>50428834
Jokes on you. I'm buying my barrels in October right now for under $100.

>>50428895
Why not? I’m about to start stacking it. The div yield is at nearly 4% now

Beautiful market Brandon, beautiful market Kramer

>>50428830
New/10
>cannabis is the better play

And just like that SOXL will never be $15 again.

>short spy
>long oil

My SPXU is looking tasty. -1% or -2% by close for sure. Thank you Cramer

okay but seriously what the fuck

i hope this piece of shit market keeps selling

>>50428878
/smg/ is pro law and order. we have to follow the thread's etiquette. I'll be in the other thread until it's time to migrate if anybody needs me.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i want to hear from this nigga RIGHT THE FUCK NOW
get your last gloat in, sister

This is some bs

Cramer...
We're dumping.

ABANDON SHIP IT'S OVER!!!!

>>50428978
Holy moley

the volatility of the volatility is bouncing off a multi-year low. run. hide.

>>50428962

>>50429017

>>50429035

I HATE SPIDERS ESPECIALLY TRAPDOOR SPIDERS

>>50429043
is this fear or capitulation?

>>50428960
>>50428962
Gotcha bros

>>50429074
this is world war 3 bro..

>>50429032
is Powell giving the super secret illuminati sign to start the dumping?

>>50428996
105$ soxl call 6 months out
kek

>>50428857
Fundamentally you are correct. However sentiment shows you are wrong. According to my technical analysis.

I literally hate myself so much

STOP SELLING, BASTERDS!!! Lord Ganesha, lend power hour your strength, sers!

lets turn sour hour into apocalyse hour cmon market you can do it

>>50429035
>>50429055

>>50428936

my (tech) company is firing people now
this is after saying we're in a good spot and have plenty of cash a few weeks ago
just a warning in case anyone is still in denial about what's coming

Anyone playing LMT earnings and new contract?

I want maybe credit spreads???

>made my money this morning and then logged off
>mfw i log back on for closing hour
Lmao what in the fuck happened?

>>50429149
hearing lots of people are getting foreclosed on as well

>>50429152
Okay coomer.

FUCKEN BASTERD BICH!!!

>>50429149
and so it begins................

literally ONE (1) stock is ALL it takes to tank the entire market from +1% to -1%

FUCK APPLE

>>50429149
>we're in a good spot
>Truth: WE're in a good spot. Not you lower rank fucks.

>>50429149
Which company? I have a feeling a lot of work from home are going to be in the opening salvo of job cuts

>>50429124
Mumus have abandoned ship. This will be Cramer hour

>>50429150
Tim Apple cutting spending plans.

UBER (Ticker:UBER) has settled with the DOJ opening itself to an SEC audit before its earnings.

August contracts are undervalued and look to be pricing in a 10% move down

>>50429149
similar. very weird though because the attitude is opposite of the actions. the attitude is everything is fine even the talk, the actions are like "BEEP BEEP BEEP please proceed to the nearest exit calmly".

>>50429199
you should have been working instead of smoking weed and jerking off to trap porn all day bro

>>50429149

Firing people is bullish actually

How many times have we done this? SIGA rockets up 30% during the week and then has a red day with people taking profits. And on that red day every time bobo's claim it's over for SIGA only for it to moon another 30%.

Hahaha, no outrage from the author, just greed.

>>50429177
$50B gone buddy

>>50429179
2008 my department went from 9 people including two directors to just one director and me and we were able to keep the same project turnaround, reading about all these wfh admin types that go to meetings for hours a day and then shitpost leads me to believe many more disposable employees are fated for the breadlines this go around

>>50429228
>Jing pan

>>50429224
GOOD MORNING NIGGER

>>50428978
Imagine her coming to pray at the altar. Bros...

lost 1k like that jesus christ this market is fucking ridiculous im out

And just like that the recession is over

WOW HOLY FUCK WHERE ARE ALL THE COCKY FUCKING BULLS NOW ROTFLMFAO

>>50429267
put it away anon

So during my trader nap I dreamt that me and my ex-girlfriend ran into each other and were chatting about the past. At one point she says to me that she didn't want me to be offended, but that I had the smallest penis than any other man she's been with, then I woke up. Feels real bad, but I think this is bullish for SIGA.

>>50429290
They got CRAMMERED.COM bro, we tried to warn them

The market will be in a better state one week from now. I just know it. Literally no reason to go down further. Yep, I'm thinking this is smooth sailing from here on out.

>>50429267
That's a solid 5.2 to 5.5 inches.

>>50429311
o-ok

can we just be bullish again please...

>>50429276
What did you do?

>>50429316
4.8 to 5.0 inches tops.

>>50429334
god im so fucking jealous of his facial hair. dude looks like a fucking actual no shit wizard fuck I want that look so badly

>>50429296
kek

>>50429357
You have to reach a level of based only achievable by a select few anon

welp

no steaks for me tonight...

>>50429337
Mondays are for dumpin'
Set reminders till October.

>>50429337
r u canadadian realtor?

>>50429374
why is franziska sad

>>50429374
i'm in the green but could've been much better if i hadn't panic bought in premarket, of course last week no amount of bad news could dump the market but today apple announcing a slowdown destroys everything...

>>50429387
she bought TQQQ

>>50429400
HAHA

>>50429400

WE'RE GOING OFF THE CLIFF

>>50429400
Why? Why is it like this?

>>50429337
Yes
>‘There’s always a bull market somewhere’: Jim Cramer’s famous words suggest you can make money no matter what. Here are 2 powerful tailwinds to take advantage of today
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/always-bull-market-somewhere-jim-173300692.html

>>50429454
Massive bull market is SPY puts, kek

>>50429400
Just how powerful is Cramer?

>>50429453
>Cramer rings bell
>Vix increasing
>Dxy decreasing
>Stocks dumping

Literally everything is bearish. Bobo's lets go!!

>>50429407
The reason everything is going down is because we're at the beginning of a recession or the beginning of a stagflation transitory period. The only way we can fix this ship is if we get more government subsidized windmills.

>>50429449
Don't worry we have been assured by the all knowing elites they can manufacture a soft depression!

Why are so many people selling Netflix? Aren't earning going to better than expected?

>>50429454
>SQQQ
>SPXS
kek

My option spread failed and I'll lose anywhere between $0 to $150 to close my shorts. I'm glad the market shit itself at 1:00. I want others to fail too.

I held my puts from Friday. knew I should have waited to open them.

Was down 40 to 60% this morning while at breakfast for my birthday.

I'm going to use my birthday wish to crash the market with no survivors and not to recover until I've accumulated to my hearts desire.

>returns deleted in a matter of an hour
nice "market"

>>50429517
>>50429518
>same timestamp
>same sentiment
>same id color
>one post apart
Happy birthday anon, I hope you get your wish

I fucking hate this shit. I'll be a on a decent streak and then one (1) measly trade will obliterate all my gains. ffs.

>i'm outperforming the SPY and NASDACK by 1%

>>50429566
Whats your secret sauce anon?

there's only pain ahead right

>>50429296
what amazes me about morbidly obese people is how relatively good-looking they can still be in the face. Like yeah, they're fat whales, but their skin still looks good and they look their age still. I'm only a little chubby but I have dark sunken eye bags, three shins and my skin looks like a mummy wrap. IDK how these lardasses get away with acting and looking reasonably vital/youthful.

mumu niggers get the rope
and cooked medium rare on my grill

>>50429580
Your pain is my gain

>>50429517
I'm over here just #MakingMoneyMonday'sWithQuasar

You think he has a lot of fun with the role he plays?

>>50429582
Truly the modern world is a mystery.

>>50429296

>>50429338
got calls at the top

Looks like XELA is trying to make its move to stay listed.

>>50429493
Bruh Wtf is a frog?

>>50429614
Is that a boy or a girl?

>>50429582
>I'm only a little chubby
there's your problem anon.
you need to be 50% adipose tissue like those worthless sacks of cells so that your skin will be stretched tighter to accommodate the slop

or you could do the right thing and add some muscle instead

>>50429628
yes.

Who is jewing who in this market?

>>50429630
I never thought about it like that. It's like botox from within.

>>50429614
Man I needed to see this before I had that desert earlier. Keeping it for future motivation

>>50429582
Hamchads are well fed and have plenty of nutrients. Its just a superior lifestyle anon.

I am...
>*inhales*
LIQUIDATED!
I AM SELFISH! I AM WRONG!
I AM RIGHT! I SWEAR I'M RIGHT!
SWEAR I KNEW IT ALL ALONG
AND I AM FLAWED!
AND I AM BLEEDING CASH SO WELL!
I AM SEEING IN ME NOW THE THINGS YOU SWORE YOU SAW YOURSELF!

>>50429628
Asking that question is deeply transphobic baggot, I'm reporting you to AOC so she can have her minions dox you.

>>50429628
diabetes

>>50429637
Everyone, me.

WTFWT

>>50429619
Why would you do that anon?

official thread song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7FrLagBXng

>>50429599
Unrelated to my position but
>listen to biz: SIGA falls to permanent lows
>ignore biz: SIGA explodes to new highs

Just bought shares in CF Industries because some options dude who was shilling a spread on them on Bloomberg. He also shilled long VIX because it bounced off of the 200 DMA

>>50428774
>CRAMERED.COM
Don't tell me Cramer was talking and retarded dipshits bought it, again.
Not gonna lie, I got spooked with the initial spike and then pump to +1% on S&P, but I believed my technical and so far it's working out.

>>50429623
>tfw 500 with an average of .20

Even before the market-wide dumping started, Google didn't seem to be benefiting at all from the stock split. Why not? Companies usually get a big boost when they do a split.

>>50429666
no, much worse, he rang the opening bell today my man.

>>50429669
>if you only knew how bad things really are

>>50429666
He rang the fucking bell this morning anon

You can only buy one for the next 20 years:
VOO
QQQ
VT
VTI
Which do you choose?

>>50429684
Kek. But to be fair, the same can be said about most other major companies that have done stock splits in the past year.

>>50429684
Why is this a gif?

>>50429664
It’s not going to $100 over night, anon. Give it a few months.

>>50429694
QQQ because we will have another tech bubble in 20 years of the trend continues.

>>50429701
google is as all-knowing and omnipresent as god. they know more than any other company, government, or central bank

WE FUCKING DID IT!! THE MARKET IS CRASHING!!

LIGHTING A BIG FUCKING CIGAR FOR ALL THE BOBOS WHO HELD ON THROUGH THE GREEN CRAB THIS MORNING. WE DESERVE THIS WIN!!

>>50429400
When Cramer will ring the seventh bell, the market apocalypse will truly be upon us

I really feel lik Cramer moved mad money to the nyse is it will make it so much easier for his friends to front run all his ticker recommendations in live time 2hrs before it shows to the public

>>50429721
Yeah I’m having a tough time deciding. My QQQ is still up 32%, my VOO is up 37%.

is it time?

YAMETE REEEEE!!!!!

Why is tesla losing all its gains today

>>50429666

>>50429727
Oh I thought you were pointing out their LGBT tendencies because of the rainbows in the logo, and maybe implying that's why google wasn't going up today.

OUT OF THE WAY MUMU FUCKS!

>>50429731
Yes fellow bobro we were taking a lot of heats from mumu’s this morning

Shall I buy calls on this shit? Just the $100 06/23 ones?

>>50429720
Im using it as an example. Everything I held for 6+ months lost money. Everyrthibf i ignore moons
Whats the pookt i dont even care anymore some people just arent meant to succeed

Tell me mumu: what are you feeling?

i know if I buy puts now, everything will start going back up...
So I'm just not gonna do it

>>50429055
horry sheet the plaque on this guys teeth

>>50429778

I’m watching & learning a lot

Imagine not possessing the intuitive sixth sense of the market to time tops with the utmost accuracy and sell at the precise moment before the dump. None of you are worthy of my excellence and none of you will make it

The answer is obvious

>>50429766
nah, they probably know when to benefit from retail liquidity more so than anyone else

holy fuck they're really dumping it today. kek. Even btc is outperforming lamo.

>>50429797
>Didn't sell at $16
You need more training

>>50429797
For me, it was 11:46

>>50428996
:) I sold. Get on my level
>>50429797

>>50429773
Just pick an etf and DCA Anon. That’s what most of us do. These side tickers are bets with play money.

>>50429799
Way to cut the deal with the Saudis, Brandon!

>>50428962
I'm more confused why it gapped up so hard in the first place.

>>50429830
POST THE CALL
LOL
LMAO

>>50429628
thats the drew carey lesbian morph
very common around college campuses

>>50429848
trapdoor spiders and vol.

thread theme:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8H-HTE8pXM

>>50429848
Gap and crap is the most painful and disheartening market, also known as getting CRAMMERED.COM

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH

>>50428960

>I FUCKING KNEW IT

LOVE YOU BOBROS!! STAY CLASSY

>>50429679
>>50429687
>>50429761
Bogdanoff-tier sell signal imo. We are at top of the channel at that.

fucking terrific

buying uvxy and holding over night

bros this can't be happening

>>50429848
Me on left and right

I told you about the Hidden Tigers.

>Still up 0.22%
Just don't do gay sex, I guess

>>50428960
>Thank you Cramer
What did he say this time? I don't follow him.

>>50428774
When did you guys stop falling for china FUD?

For me it was Evergrande, anything since then has only emboldened my view that china doesnt matter at all desu.

Damn bro it keeps going.

>>50429894
ive been holding for a month now
lmao
wheres the fucking crash wheres them circuit breakers

>>50428774
>mfw bought more SIGA before closing

CLOSING AT DEM LOWS, KEK, CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP

THANK YOU BASED CRAMER!

I can't get over how fucking retarded it is when some random company like Apple says something vague about hiring and suddenly the entire market shits its pants in sync. Totally fucking stupid.

I sold covered calls Friday and this morning :)

Expect a large green dildo tomorrow

this shit is so demoralizing. you have a decent week then wake up to spy green and think "hey maybe its going to be okay" and then this horseshit happens

>>50429914
china not mattering is in itself evidence that china is falling apart

>Thanks Cramer
t.BoboGang

>>50429941
that green dildo is staying up your boipussi, mumu nigger

WHY DIDN'T YOU WATCH CRAMER'S SHOW
HE TRIED TO WARN YOU WITH SOUNDBOARD TODAY
WHY DIDN'T YOU LISTEN?
THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED
ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS WATCH CNBC

>>50429932
Yeah hey wtf, this is exactly what happened on Thursday.

>>50429943
How many weeks?

>>50429941
Here you dropped this

>they bought on a day when cramer rang the bell

Cramer has been doing this for what, 10? 15? 30? years? If you haven't learned by now to do the opposite of everything he says you get what you deserve.

BOIL bros, when are we selling? 100 again? 200 even? I'm feeling smug

>>50429942
It's all bullshit though, Apple isn't the fucking stock market and massive companies are inevitably going to reduce staff and increase automation as time goes on. I just can't believe that all the jewish algorithms are so fucking squirrely

Got some Chicken Pot Pie in the oven and some Bangs, up $2500 on today's positions. Feeling pretty good. *crack*

>>50429984
Based Bangschad

>>50429978
The other day he tweeted something about crypto and btc pumped like hell. You Cramer schizos are something else.

>>50429984
Maybe I'll buy some Dr. Pepper

BUDDY LOOK AT APPLE COMPUTER

>>50429984
>Chicken Pot Pie
Three of my favorite things

>>50429934
Fed is just dumping their assets, the Apple thing is merely a cover.

What happened to all those smug mumu from this morning?

>>50429878
>>50429933
>>50429948

It's accelerating, holy shit!

Mumu's switching to copium because they ran out of hopium

>>50429984
Regular or Oliet?

tomorrow the SPY drops below 370.

OIL? OIL.

>>50430007
Nah. This is just more cockfighting algorithms trying to short each other into oblivion with leverage. Bunch of cynical fucking assholes ruining it for everyone else.

this is such fucking bullshit man

>>50429984

>>50429934
you do realize apple is the largest weighed in the S&P right?

i am down thousands but pistachios were on sale at the store so i'm feeling fine

>>50430046
So in the end fundamentals don't matter if you trade indices.

>>50429984
Based, sounds comfy anon

Okay, nevermind, now I'm red.

So what happened? Rarely visit here anymore and have no clue why the markets dumped hard.

>>50430049

Invest in $HOPE and $COPE before you buy the $ROPE

>>50430049
Cool it with the antisemitism

>>50430040
OIL!

>>50430051
And yet that's not what Wikipedia says.

My God we are just power dumping into close.

>>50430077

>that volume
we gap up tomorrow.

dont care - GME still green! kek baggies

>Holding DRV through FOMC and Housing Starts data
Any other comfy Real estate bear ETFs?

>>50430053
And? Who are the fucking retards smashing the sell button so hard on predictable news? Oh that's right, it's not even real people, it's haywire headline scraping computer programs. Fuck this shit.

>>50430067
Apple said something everyone with a third of a brain could have predicted but since the market is run by a bunch of algorithms watching algorithms watching algorithms we get a massive overleveraged dump every time there's a new spooky headline

i hate women so much

>>50429980
redpill me on natural gas, I want to recoup the increase in my electric bill. It looks like the meme chart at a dead cat bounce

>>50430077
Checked we gotta got that Cramer down 1% ringing opening bell day track record going

>>50430075
>trusting a website that alters their info constantly to fit a narrative

>>50430106
you are a woman

One barrel of oil is worth one (1) share of SPY

are you guys ready, for tomorrow. tomorrow we're going to gap down and sell off all day. you have been warned. also Biden has a meeting with Former Prime Minister Shinzo Abe next week, because this post is dubz.

CRRAAAAAMMEEEEEERRRRRR

>>50430095
Seems like other choices are, I shit you not, SRS and REK. https://etfdb.com/etfs/sector/real-estate/#etfs&sort_name=ytd_percent_return&sort_order=desc&page=1

>>50430117
while its true I do in fact hate myself, I am not actually a woman

>>50430110
Cool it faggot, just crack open a refreshing Bangs and chill out

>>50429805
BTC will commence dumping soon kek

This is the worst bullshit I've ever seen in my whole life

>>50430109
anyone who didnt take cramer as a leading indicator is retarded

>>50430139
>BTC will commence dumping soon
How? I thought HODL MODE was compulsory?

>>50430125
The West fears Cyber Abe

Now Id just like to speak to this Mr Cramer

>>50430150
You must be and adult to post here

>YFW you didn't buy

you people are really fucking funny. I love you all <3

>>50430135
you are tonight

>>50429337

>>50429694
VOO

What’s your average SIGA cost

I am literally shaking with absolute rage right now.

>>50429774
Oil majors are pretty overvalued compared to smaller E&Ps.

Its only down 2.3% from the high of the day!!!! Bobo btfo!!!!!!!!

LOL. so much for the emerging bull market.
every day i feel so much pain because i hesitate to buy as i see the prices go up bit by bit. and then i feel a huge relief when they go back down. yet i am hesitant to buy either. which means i will remain on the sidelines forever and when the market truly rallies i will still wait and hope it will go down so i could finally jump in. but when it does crash again i will still have fear. there is no solution to fear. i've never lost money on stocks. but i've lost a shit ton of money on missed opportunities.

>pump it during premarket
>dump on retail during market hours
>pump it back up during AH and premarket hours
>dump it on retail during market hours
>repeat
based

Wtf I actually closed in the green

ding! ding! ding!

market's closed now

fuck (you)

>>50429943
new warlord period when

>>50430132
>REK
Kek, very appropriate

i started the day up 2000 and i ended it down 3000

Ding ding ding! How did it go today anon?

Shoutout to HD for being my only green hold of the day.

>Cramer on CNBC now

>all these people cheering

thanks for the 15K mumu. you sure slurped up those calls you big boi you. pretty much hit my weekly goal so see you friday maybe.

>>50429237
I just heard of the square root rule and I like it.
Half of the work is done by the square root of the employees

My 100k SPXU position making me feel like burry

holding it through tomorrow and the rest of the week. wish me luck bobos

>>50429936
Same dude.
So comfy just rolling slightly OTM calls every month in this trash market, knowing full well they'll expire worthless.

Even when oil stocks pulled that megapump in May, they still managed to dump back into OpEx and expire worthless kek.

>>50430239
top successfully swung, green today

>>50429669
It is only during bubble times that companies see a big benefit from doing a stock split. You obvious haven't been in the market long. Usually what happens when a stock splits is nothing.

>>50430239
+.12%
I'm making pizza tonight to celebrate

>>50430239
-4.9%, after subtracting 9.1% daily inflation

>>50430232
When food shipments start becoming irregular the military divisions will take the food for themselves.

I finished the day up 4% and this is my son, H. W.

who else here /heemed/

>imagine not investing In Cannabis right now

>>50428774
I’m still holding 1 (one) 1 siga

>>50430304
Kek, I'm still down like 90% or something on SGMD

>>50430301
not us oilbros
we gushing

>>50430239
Literally everything I did was wrong
Down 1.968% in on the big basket
Down 5.917% in the small basket
Idk how much more of this I can take... there's just no fucking point anymore

>LOOK AT THE FUTURES

The dump is continuing through the night.

SLEEP WELL MUMUS HAHAHAHA

>>50430304
Shh don’t tell these ppl about that

>>50430301
I didn't hear no bell.

i fucking hate mumu niggers
you deluded fucks can't just let it crash can you
have to prolong the shit for as long as possible
retards

>>50430265
When the market turns I will remember you

My lil JEPQ outperformed

>>50430377
I will close at -4% SPY. Let's see what happens.

>>50429311
during my trader nap i dreamed that aapl was laying off. then i sleep-bought puts on aapl

>>50430407
JEPI was a mistake...

>>50430407
But how is JELQ?

So IBM did well?

are IBM earnings already out? algos seem confused

>>50430362
Of course you didn't they threw in the towel. You have blood coming out of your ears they heemed you so hard.

New >>50430447

>>50429694
VT is for commies
in other news, I panic sold my calls and accidentally bought more calls and didnt realize it until just now. /heemed/

>>50430440
IBM 2Q REV. $15.54B, EST. $15.16B

>>50430218
You sound like you need to just open an IRA and just put the money there. You're trying to live the life of a day trader and buddy, you ain't one. You're better off not losing everything gambling because given what you just spent time to write (trolling or otherwise) your mindset is completely warped. Do yourself and your future a favor and just be a wagie and be good at it and don't come here ever again. That's a tip from someone who learned by himself how to trade and is not gonna bullshit you.

Get out. Don't come back and forget this place ever existed.

>>50430338
I don’t get how they can be so delusional. One more black swan and we’re looking at a pretty serious recession. Watch the market freak the fuck out on Friday when Russia doesn’t turn Nord Stream 1 back on. Even if that does go back on, the news is still all bad for the foreseeable future

>>50430265
I dipped out of my SPXS today for 5% gains. I was going to stay cash today but I prayed to God and he told me to short today because of Cramer.

>>50430304
Just bought ACB because of this post, what a throwback.

>>50430532
>One more black swan
bullish
>pretty serious recession
priced in

>>50430588
Cant be priced in, jobless claims havent really amped up at all. If that piece of good news goes sour we’re really in for it

>>50430199
Kek. I’m in Fremont right now.

kek baggies