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/biz/ - Business & Finance

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12185949 No.12185949 [Reply] [Original]

Pretend you're a multi millionaire from investing in crypto or stocks.

What would you say if your female friend asked you your profession or "what do you do?"

Do you say you're a successful investor? Or do you hide that you're rich.

I feel like every women would be a gold digger if they knew I was rich.

>> No.12185970

>>12185949
Tell them you're a private consultant. Don't let those motherfuckers know anon

>> No.12185985
File: 3.01 MB, 350x193, wVSzTcM.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12185985

>>12185949
>2019
>Having female friends
topjej

>> No.12185987

>>12185949
Never. Ever. Ever use your wealth as a leverage to impress women. Or anybody for that matter. Only brainletts do this shit and it is seldom beneficial.

>> No.12185992

>>12185949
"I'm collecting NEET bucks"

>> No.12185993

I would never talk to anyone

>> No.12186005

"i became a millionaire from the cryptocurrency called LINK"

>> No.12186016

Tell them you "do remote IT from home, its pretty sweet", or you "trade securities on the exchange". Never tell anyone you dont have to work. Make what you say you do sound boring.

>> No.12186026

>>12185949
Tell her you're an artist or a drug dealer.

>> No.12186038

>>12185987
wealth will make them suck your cock if they find out on their own without having you saying "I'm wealthy"

>> No.12186068
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12186068

Girls don't actually care, as long as you got the money and can prove it.

Even if you're born into millions and do nothing, they don't care how you got it as long as you got it

>> No.12186086

>>12185949
I would say “I’m wearing black gloves through your mall, I’m rich.”

>> No.12186092

>>12186026
This. I fucked an 8/10 girl who when she asked me what i did i just kind of shugged and said ehhh... She just smiled said ok and we kept talking. Women dont give a shit what you do.

>> No.12186129

>>12185949
"I grow the best tomatoes you will ever taste in my greenhouse. You'll only know that I'm telling the truth if you stay for breakfast, though."

>> No.12186175

Just let them know, then ignore them.

The sheer buttblister could heat you all winter.

>> No.12186196

>>12185949
Maybe you should ask yourself your profession or "what do you do?" anon. You don't literally believe the good fortunes of 2017 had much to do with any kind of actual skill do you? If you're going to continue investing as a professional you might as well just tell them that because you won't be very rich in terms of income anyway even though you technically have a high net worth. Myself I am going to open a small green grocery so I will tell them I am a green grocer.

>> No.12186271

>>12185987
haha fuck off. I'm not gonna flaunt but yeah I'm going to leverage it to get a 9 or 10. What I won't tell them is that I had a vasectomy and I'll just blow loads in them thinking they are going to trap me.

>> No.12186305

>>12185985
kek
only beta cuck orbiter faggots have female friends
can't learn anything of value from a women, unlike the other way around

>> No.12186320

Just say you work in Finance

>> No.12186329

>>12186271
>T.brainlet who thinks he isn't gonna get cucked regardless
Anybody that needs to flaunt money to get a 9 or 10 is either a fatass, ugly as shit, a manlett, autistic, and always undeniably a beta. Look at poker boy for example.

>> No.12186448

>>12186129
now thats a pickup line

>> No.12186595

>>12185949
I would tell her that I put my savings into crypto, and that I'd give her $1000 worth of Tron if she shits her pants right in front of me at this very moment.

If that doesn't do it, up the price until it's at a point where her dignity takes a backseat to the money.

>> No.12186637

>>12186271
>Not using a dimes genetics to make beautiful kids
>Vasectomy
You've been kiked

>> No.12186672

>>12185949
>pretend
Lol dumb wagie. Here's some real advice from a real cryptomillionaire.

I'd tell her that I do "some stuff online in my spare time", and that "maybe I'd like to do "some entrepreneur stuff someday". You downplay it until she thinks you have no career or semblence of wealth at all, and she's catch 22'd.

The only roastie that you allow to touch your money is the roastie that doesn't want to touch it.

>> No.12186749

>>12185949
>I'm a multi millionaire from investing in crypto/stocks
Then laugh

>> No.12186757

>>12186637
>>12186637
Anyone with half a brain freezes their sperm at 18 when they are at their healthiest.

>> No.12186765

>>12185949
the trick is to let them know you are rich but not too rich

>> No.12186774

>>12185949
I would say I have a webstore which would be true for those sweet American Express points which I can use for free air travel.

>> No.12186786

>>12185987
No retard. You flaunt your wealth but don’t let them have it. It’s easy to get a groupie to come along for the ride (pun intended). Then boot her off. It’s like Instagram whores fucking other instagrammers with millions of followers.

>> No.12186858

>>12185949
>Self employed button clicker.

>> No.12186873

>>12186305
I mean you could be the one friend zoning the chick cause she's fat/ugly or whatever its entirely possible to be friends with a girl and not want to fuck her.

>> No.12187041

>>12185949
just a few years ago, i would've flaunted wealth. now, if i ever get it, i will conceal. there is absolutely no benefit to flash.

>> No.12187052

I'm a pimp

>> No.12187068

>>12186329
Yeah... this is 4channel right? Post your timestamped pic Fabio.

>> No.12187086

I usually tell girls I'm an influencer on Instagram as well as Twitter but would like to keep my personal life separated from my influencer life :)

>> No.12187153
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12187153

>thot you just want to smash
Tell them you take out monstrous loans to live your presumably free-time rich life of comfort and/or adventure. Let them think you're a really fun guy to sleep with but not a rich guy to sucker.

>qt you want to long-term
Pretend like you're a down on your luck unemployed neet going nowhere in life. If she loves you then, she'll love you no matter what and for who you really are inside. I just let someone go like that, she met and loved me at my lowest and I kinda feel the regret creeping up desu

>> No.12187203

>>12187153
lowkey sprayway streakless glass cleaner is the best fucking glass cleaner on the market

i clean my gun store counters with it and i consistently get comments on how clear my glass is, like it isnt even there

>> No.12187232

>I'm a vagabond

If I ever got fuck-you money, I'd hit the road.

>> No.12187288
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12187288

>>12185949
>I steal shit

I would never dream of telling someone that I'm affluent

>> No.12187295

>>12185949
just say you are a commission artist and you make banner ads for sleazy websites.

>> No.12187332

>>12185970
good
>>12185985
good catch
>>12185993
silent chad
>>12186016
fucking retarded senpai
>>12186092
larp
>>12186129
way too fucking long
>>12186672
meh. you got something.

here's what you tell her word by word you fucking social brainlets.

>I do tech work. It's kind of difficult to explain but it's pretty fascinating. I work for a technology company that's ushering in the internet's new data infrastructure. Example, I help take care of all the data that runs through your computer, phone, or tablet. Don't worry I can't hack you or read what data is being provided, the data i receive is all encrypted end to end. So I help manage that data, without that data ever being exposed. I love it because I work remotely, it helps me travel to Europe, S.America, Asia and even the Galapagos island. Makes sense right?

Whatever her answer is
>Oh wow you're smart. Most people don't get it. Good job. You get a shinny star sticker.

Screencap this frens and save it when link moons

>> No.12187361

>>12187332
that's fucking retarded

>> No.12187377

>>12187332
Just say you're a computer progammer for fuck's sake. How hard is that. Even if you only know how to write three lines of code what does it matter? No one else knows the difference and programmers make bank.

>> No.12187402

>>12187332
programmer working from home IS the answer. it makes you look rather smart and keep low profile.

>> No.12187413
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12187413

Bitcoin. Retired.

>> No.12187430

>>12187377
>>12187402
because you fucking autists, girls don't have quick fucks because you're a "programmer". That makes pussy dry. Makes you sound like a beta cuck. (Respects to fellow programmers). She needs to know you're a chad. a top dog and run with the best pack. Hence explain it to her in normie terms and make it sound exciting, because it is. (you travel the world. oh shit this guy is loaded. sell don't tell frens)

>> No.12187610

>>12187332
>I do tech work. It's kind of difficult to explain but it's pretty fascinating. I work for a technology company that's ushering in the internet's new data infrastructure. Example, I help take care of all the data that runs through your computer, phone, or tablet. Don't worry I can't hack you or read what data is being provided, the data i receive is all encrypted end to end. So I help manage that data, without that data ever being exposed. I love it because I work remotely, it helps me travel to Europe, S.America, Asia and even the Galapagos island. Makes sense right?
YIKES

>> No.12187627

>>12187430
basically talking to her like if she was some kind of retarded whore. this is retarded. programming is fine and can show that you can make it on your own.

>> No.12187638

>>12187430
>That makes pussy dry
you don't want pussy that dries up at the prospect of someone who is productive with his time instead of destructive

unless you're already a total chad in which case why do you need this advice

if she only wants destructive men then you won't cut it and she'll cheat on you

>> No.12187642

>>12185949
if i was rich i wouldnt care just dont marry or cohabit long enough for common law marriage!

>> No.12187658

>>12187430
this. you're all virgins if you don't see that
>I do tech work. It's kind of difficult to explain but it's pretty fascinating. I work for a technology company that's ushering in the internet's new data infrastructure. Example, I help take care of all the data that runs through your computer, phone, or tablet. Don't worry I can't hack you or read what data is being provided, the data i receive is all encrypted end to end. So I help manage that data, without that data ever being exposed. I love it because I work remotely, it helps me travel to Europe, S.America, Asia and even the Galapagos island. Makes sense right?
will make them gush.

>> No.12187669

>>12187430
i never had pussy dry on me inless i started talking about machine code and assembler

>> No.12187673

>>12185949
Yeah fuck it this board has become /adv/ v2.0 after the crash so why not
Here you go https://www.youtube.com/user/rsdfreetour

>> No.12187692

>>12185949
>I bought bitcoin, you should have too

>> No.12188005

Just say you are an investor. That's what you are.

>> No.12188040

Same as what I tell people now
>I'm do translations for small enterprises
Its what gets getting me of the hook from telling everyone I'm a NEET and it will get me off the hook if/when I'm a millionaire.

>> No.12188102

>>12188005
No, you're a speculator.

>> No.12188121

Lots of fags who clearly were not here for the bubble - that's okay, it's expected most of those people would be gone because they either cashed out or got eternally justed and killed themselves

Here's what you do when the next bull run comes: You never tell anyone about what you've had or what you now have. Nobody, not family members, and especially not women. You need to go off the grid because they will try to take everything you have. By they, I don't only mean (((them))), but them too. You will get assraped (possibly literally) the moment you tell anyone you have anything. Why do you think someone like Shkreli is in prison getting anally mutilated by a giga nigga every night? He couldn't keep his fucking mouth shut

>> No.12188127

If you want to onky smash somebody flaunt your wealth and if you want lifepartner keep it hidden.

>> No.12188129

I used to say I work at a supermarket because I did even if it was only once a week. Gave that away completely now that the people I liked left though. Thinking of starting a website or something that I can pretend brings in the dough.

>> No.12188132

>>12188102
same thing

>> No.12188137

>>12188132
Not quite.

>> No.12188144

>>12188127
If you want to get drugged and held hostage or raided by CIA niggers and DHS*

>> No.12188153

>>12188137
explain the difference then

>> No.12188168

>>12188153
Investors invest money into a venture like purchasing a factory and paying employees. Speculators buy high and sell low speculative assets like commodities.

>> No.12188189

>I'm a quality controller for a Bolivian armpit sniffing imageboard. It's important work because whenever the quality gets too high I have to post there's a Vishnu on the blockchain. Would you like to see some of my racist frog memes?

>> No.12188198

>>12188132
>he doesn't know

>> No.12188203

>>12188144
Wut, that has never happened to me but Im not living in some shithole country. It’s so much easier to get chicks when you are rich why not enjoy it.

>> No.12188217
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12188217

>>12188203
Enjoy all your wealth and life literally getting succed out of your dick hole

>> No.12188223

>>12188168
the oxford dictionary disagrees
>investor: A person or organization that puts money into financial schemes, property, etc. with the expectation of achieving a profit.
>speculator: A person who invests in stocks, property, or other ventures in the hope of making a profit.

>> No.12188250
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12188250

put one of these on your car and you don't have to say a thing

>> No.12188271

>>12186005
>t. anybody with at least 1 LINK in 2022

>> No.12188281

>>12188217
Lmao, I know how to keep my wealth safe and I have never had any problems because I can use some common knowledge.

>> No.12188291
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12188291

>>12188281

>> No.12188293

>>12185949
tell people your rich and people will try to kill or rob you for the money.

>> No.12188297

>>12187658
>this guy got to be the most boring faggot i've seen in the last decade
>better fuck chad over there

>> No.12188318

"i work with autistic adults helping them invest"

>> No.12188328

>>12185949
"I'm unemployed, but I get by"

>> No.12188330

>female
>friend

>> No.12188344
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12188344

>>12186129

>> No.12188355
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12188355

>>12186305
>can't learn anything of value from a women, unlike the other way around
>a women

>> No.12188357

>>12188344
looking lovely tonight ladies

>> No.12188376
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12188376

>>12187669
>i never had pussy dry on me inless i started talking about machine code and assblaster
This is how I read this.

>> No.12188385
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12188385

>>12188357
and then walk away

>> No.12188396

>>12188385
gold. cheers for the pic, lost it

>> No.12188661

>>12187430

Exactly, working as a "programmer" (this includes either software developers or data scientists) might pay well but it's a low social status gig where you'll be immediatly be branded as an awkward nerd.

Deconstruting that previous suggestion:
"I work in a tech company doing world changing stuff and I get to do it while travelling around the world"

See what I did there? I pretty much only left the things with a high social status/capital, that's the ONLY thing bitches care about.

>> No.12188684

>>12188661
What about being a manager of a bunch of IT nerds? A director of IT?

>> No.12188707

>>12185949
This >>12185987

You tell her you run an internet business, or do some investing on the side, and you have a modest but comfortable living from it.

I come from a wealthy family, and a famous one in my country. And let me anecdotally tell you it has been a fucking kryptonite to my relationships with women, friends and even colleagues. Absolutely no one thinks better of me for it once they know and its always been a detriment. I really fucking hate my life because of what its made me into.

Live comfortably anon, but never expose your wealth to anyone. Maybe once you find a girl you love and trust completely you can let her in on it once you've sealed the deal. But every impression by people of you should be of who you are, not what you're worth.

>> No.12188716

>>12187332
Too long? I already left off the part about how rabbit turds make the best fertilizer.

>> No.12188720

>>12187153
That's someone's wife on Reddit, cuckold.

>> No.12188754

>>12185987
>implying I won't rub my newfound wealth in the face of every girl who rejected me
>implying I won't be banging them and then dropping them
>implying I won't have coked out threesomes with thots

>> No.12188771

>>12188684

I was also considering that scenario. Being a manager is for sure a high social status job so if you change the word "work" to "manage" from that statement I think you'll entice bitches even more.

>> No.12188827

>>12188121

you are right

>> No.12188830

>>12185949
>What would you say if your female friend
I dont befriend with subhumans

>> No.12188852

>>12185949
They only think you have as much as you dress/drive. That’s why luxury cars and designer clothes exist. Let that explain the type of woman you want to attract.

>> No.12188874

>>12185949
Why the hell does this image source only come back to here?

>> No.12188897

>>12186749
this desu

>> No.12188905

>>12185949
You manage digital assets

>> No.12189263

>>12187332
>Oh wow you're smart. Most people don't get it. Good job. You get a shinny star sticker.
try hard cringe
"Oh wow you're smart", Without emotional delivery is enough.

>> No.12189271

>>12188189
Best post