/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

>>10199729

>>10199733
why

I feel like I hate my style in lolita. I don't even have a style. It's just a mess and I want to sell everything. I like so many things that none of my shit goes together.

>>10199753
Try this approach. Don’t sell anything yet. Sort out all your lolita things. Look at them all together. Choose your favorite things of what you have and put them together. How does it feel? Why do you like them so much? What else can you add to them to make them into nice coords? What is the general feel and theme of your favorite items? What are the main colors, themes, motifs? How can you build on it? Now look at the rest of your items and sort out anything that doesn’t go with what you love. Sell those.
Sometimes sorting by what you like best instead of what to get rid of can change your perspective.

I've been with my boyfriend for three and a half years. I love him a lot, and I can easily picture being with him for the rest of my life. But just now we had an argument that really put me on edge and I feel like it might be a red flag.
We were talking about where we'd like to live in the future, and what our ideal houses would be. He spoke about it first, and then I said
> I'd love to live somewhere near a lolita comm, and near at least one decent convention. I'd also love to have my own cute room that I could decorate fully pink and use for doing resin and other crafting.
> Wow... so how am I supposed to afford that?
> What? It's just my idea of a perfect house.
> So you want me to buy a house with like five rooms so you can have a room just for doing your arts and crafts?
> Well no, we don't need five rooms... and resin is a potentially toxic substance, I want to keep it away from where the cats might get into it.
> So what if we had a kid? You'd just have a room to yourself and they'd have nothing?
> No, I'm just talking about my ideal place.
> Well, I thought your ideal was... you know what, forget it. Why are we even talking about this in the first place?
I tried to get him to finish his sentence, but he refused. I'm really concerned he was going to say "being a mother." Because I never wanted kids until I met him, and I made it expressly clear that isn't a thing I'm in a place to do until quite a while from now.
And I'm really worried that if I DO become a mother, it's going to become a trap of "how dare you have business goals / a hobby / like cute things when you're a MOTHER! You shouldn't be prioritizing yourself over your child!"

>>10199868
This is a conversation you need to initiate again and don't let him stonewall you. If he's afraid to tell you the truth, that's a red flag. You need to be patient with him, but don't let this go. Being on the same page is extremely important, especially about big life decisions like pregnancy. Sorry you're going through this anon.

>>10199868
This is why i'm staying single forever.

>>10199773
There is hope for cgl after all. Amazing advice Anon.

>>10199868
Ask him what his ideal is and what he wants you to be. Don’t let him brush it off, it’s important. It’s okay to leave if your answers don’t match. Someone getting this upset about dreaming up a hobby room is not normal. Also the “how am *I* supposed to afford that” is another red flag. Does he not expect you to work?

>>10199868
Just have some kids lol.

>>10199931
I wish I could take credit, but it’s really just the Konmari sorting method applied to lolita fashion. I hate to see someone struggling hard to find their style. Sometimes we just need another fresh look.

>>10199877
>>10199939
I went and spoke to him again. After some prodding then sentence was going to be "Well, I thought your ideal was being with me."
He went on to talk about how he feels like he's just replaceable, and that he thinks I'd consider leaving him for someone with more money. He was upset, thinking that I was saying I "needed" a room to myself or else I wouldn't want to live with him.
The conversation kind of deviated from there and he went into a depression spiral about his job, responsibilities, life, money, future, etc. Then we started talking about the "how am I supposed to afford that" thing.
It's been a pretty big issue in our relationship from the start that I don't earn as much money as him, and he thinks that if you're not hired by a company or working for the government, you'll be a poorfag your whole life.
He brought up that I've had two years to work on my business, but I didn't do much. I explained that I was busting my ass full time in a job I hated to put aside a large pile of savings for the future, and I didn't have the time or energy to work on anything else. Said he "felt like an asshole" if he talked about it further, since it involves my mental health, and tried to draw a comparison between that and people scamming money through Patreon or Kickstarter and then claiming "mental health issues" to not deliver.
We eventually talked it out and came to a place of understanding - he's worried about money and affording a decent life, I don't want to sacrifice my business goals or hobbies. Things are alright now, but I never really know if these issues are solved. When it comes to this topic, we seem to have it blow up again every year or half year.

>>10199939
She probably doesn't work.

>>10199868
Why was his first reaction "How am I supposed to pay for that"? and not "we"? Are you guys on the same page about money handling, and do you contribute about evenly to the relationship (not even just with money, but with time and effort)? He sounds like he might feel the need to play "breadwinner" and is worried about his ability to live up to your dreams. It also sounds like you had different objectives in the conversation - him trying to get a realistic view of what you might want in the future (and therefore what to work towards), and you dreaming about an ideal without having to worry about the logistics. I guess the difference is planning (him) vs just having fun thinking about it (you).

Note that none of those actually excuse his response towards you, which came across very dismissive and harsh. If he wanted to have a more realistic conversation about money and goals, there are better ways to do it than by shitting all over your interests and somehow accusing you of not caring about your future kids (seriously, what??). Do you get the sense that he thinks your hobbies and interests are a youthful thing and you'll be expected to put them away as your grow up together? It's unethical for a total stranger reading a snippet of your conversation to give you "leave/stay" advice, so that's not my intention. Just think about what both your goals are moving forward, and whether your expectations, problem solving techniques, and conversation skills can be aligned to meet them.

>>10199964
Yikes, anon, he sounds really resentful. I would be careful if I were you. He doesn't sound like he particularly trusts your judgment on things and is scared you'll not live up to his expectations.

From the sounds of it, he's worried about potentially settling and not having a certain lifestyle with you, or that he's going to be taking on too much responsibility in your relationship. Being with a small business owner can be stressful. Have you guys ever talked about that stress and how to cope with it?

My advice is that if you're having this issue every couple of months, you might need to reevaluate if you're compatible partners. Relationships are logistics first and foremost. If someone feels unequal, taken advantage of, resentful, or like they're constantly conceding on their wants for their partner's wants, that relationship is going to implode. He already compared you to someone who doesn't deliver with the patreon comment. Ouch.

Mental health can take a toll on relationships. It stress tests them. You have to really put some more thought into this issue or it'll catch you by surprise one day when someone implodes.

>>10199964
> I explained that I was busting my ass full time in a job I hated to put aside a large pile of savings for the future
Wait... you’re working full time and he’s mad that you aren’t working more on your personal side gig? Does your side gig burn money or is he just being a dick?

>he "felt like an asshole" if he talked about it further, since it involves my mental health, and tried to draw a comparison between that and people scamming money through Patreon or Kickstarter and then claiming "mental health issues" to not deliver
Well I mean he’s right... he is an asshole

>>10199868
Let's recap.
She had dreams, larger city, expensive hobbies, wants entire room of her own for decor and crafting
BUT
in reality, doesn't craft much, has mental issues, doesn't make at least half of the income to pay for any of said dreams, no sign of crafting business actually becoming viable.

Sorry, anon, I actually can see why he might be worried and feel pressured.

>>10200001
My side gig is what I want to be my full-time gig, but it hasn't gotten to a place where I can make a living off of it. He was saying I didn't put in enough effort to grow it, and he doesn't feel like I'm dedicated enough to it and was using my job and mental health as an excuse.
Him and I live in different countries, so to come here I left my job (I informed them this was going to happen when they hired me, so it wasn't out of the blue). Due to the visa I'm on, I'm not legally allowed to work or earn money, so I can't do anything for my business until I return home.
Also, it doesn't really burn that much money, aside from the investment in supplies, which was more than easy to cover working full time.

>>10199999
I think he does resent me for sure. I can't blame him, everybody wants a good life, and having a financially successful girlfriend would definitely help him.
I just can't help but be confused when two or so weeks ago we had this same conversation, but he told me he supported me no matter what, and that I needed to stop feeling guilty or like a burden, because I "deserve to be happy".
I would say that he's just saying whatever I want to hear, but he seemed so sincere when he said it, I just don't know.

>>10200010
I see where you're coming from. But I was upfront with him about everything before we started dating, and he said he was fine with it and even preferred it. About 2 years into the relationship he admitted he had been lying, and thought I would change my plans for him.
Also no problem living in a small city, just want to be close to cons for business, resin is pretty inexpensive, and the separate room would be to keep our pets away from a dangerous substance. It's not a "must-have" for me, but in my ideal house, yes I would like a crafting area so I didn't have to stress about the cats.

>>10200010

Also to recap, she was daydreaming about an ideal, nowhere was it mentioned that she expected those things to be given to her without putting in her own share of work. Sounds like she isn't making a high income right now, but she's saving for the future and that's a big detail you glossed over.

I might say "I want to take an extended vacation in Europe and visit a bunch of old castles" and even if I don't make enough for it right now, that desire doesn't mean I'm demanding someone else pay for it. It's just a thing that sounds nice to me and if I want it then I'll earn it someday.

If simply daydreaming about nice things makes him feel pressured enough to respond like a jackass, that's his fault and not hers. It'd be an entirely different story if she was acting entitled to his money, but she seems to realize it's a "maybe someday in the future, if the business works out and I have money" sort of thing and he's treating her like a golddigger that wants him to buy her a palace.

The most important thing here is that a relationship isn't a case of "winning" and proving you're right. If they both genuinely care about each other and want to last, they need to stop trying to win arguments and figure out how to get on the same page to resolve them. There seems to be a lot of resentment if this issue is causing a blowup fight every few months.

>>10200022
So... he’s mad you moved for him? And he knew that meant that would mess with your finances? Not to be judge mental but what the fuck?

Also, don’t listen to him. If he knew you had to leave your full time job and we’re legally not allowed to work, it’s not your fault that your side gig isn’t paying the bills. He shouldn’t have expected it to.

>>10200022
I'm stressed out just reading your replies anon. He's not telling you the truth, you admitted he lies to you to appease you, he secretly expects you to agree with him "eventually", and you seem weirdly unaffected by all of these red flags.

Resentment kills relationships. Even otherwise good ones. You being upfront doesn't mean he's being upfront, and that's a habit he needs to nip in the bud if you both want to make this work. He has to start by being honest, not passive aggressive. He needs to find a better way to explain himself fully without 1) lying and 2) being an asshole.

He sounds like he's done waiting for you to "figure yourself out". If he's done, he needs to own up to it.

>>10200022
Making you feel bad for not having income while also encouraging you into a situation where you legally cannot make an income is...worrisome. Combined with what you said about how he seems to think you should drop everything and be a mother and not want business goals, well. I'm not gonna call it "financial abuse" but it's in the beginning stages of it. Make sure you have those savings as a safety net in case you ever need to leave, cause there's something wrong with a guy that'll have you get a visa that prohibits you from working and then shame you for not having an income.

>>10200030
>>10200038
That's the difficult part. I've expressed to him before how this arrangement fucks with my income, and while he listens, I don't know if he really... gets it?
The only jobs I can take in between visits are ones that I can quit easily without it leaving a negative impression on my future employment prospects. No ""real"" job is going to be okay with me leaving for six months every two years.
I was willing to accept this and the other sacrifices that come with moving to a new country, or at least hopping back and forth between them. But I don't know if he fully understood what he was getting into.

>>10200037
I'm mostly just in denial, I guess. I'm really bad at addressing problems, and any pushback I get makes me feel guilty for being prodding. He's really good at pretending like nothing is wrong, and when he does get pushed to answer, he normally just says "I don't know."
Some of the red flags are past behavior (like lying at the start of the relationship) that I don't really know how to bring up or address without seeming vindictive, like I'm digging up things from the past to make him feel bad.

>>10200054
If it’s six months every two years, why are you the only one doing it? Four years is a perfectly acceptable amount of time to be in a job and you would not be obligated to disclose that. If you are only at a poorly paying job because of this arrangement, that’s a huge flag too. He either doesn’t care about your career, doesn’t want you to have one, or yes, is orchestrating financial abuse.

I love to look at good lolita coords and learn things about the fashion, draw lolita characters , but I don't have a strong desire to wear it. I sometime wear j fashion/jfashion inspired clothing but I never bother to buy brand and do coords ( idk if it sound like lolita at heart at this point ).

>>10200060

We're in the same boat! Although I wouldn't call it "lolita at heart", you either are a lolita or you aren't. But there's nothing wrong with being a fan and appreciating the fashion and its fine details, while knowing that actually wearing it isn't for you. I came here for the convention and cosplay discussions but got sucked into the lolita threads, and I don't own a single piece of lolita. But I feel the same way about learning about the fashion, getting excited about new releases, saving and sharing photos, and appreciating good coords.

>>10200060
>>10200061
As long as you aren’t larping or lying about having experience, giving concrit here or demanding entry to lolita events no one cares. I don’t really cosplay but my friends do and I like to pop in to cosplay threads sometimes to admire their work. Just be normal and we’re chill.

>>10200054
From one conflict averse girl to another, figure out how to address conflict now and start by being blunt. My last relationship ended because I was a pushover and dreaded conflict like the plague.

I've since realized conflict is good and necessary. It lets us see if we're truly compatible with the people around us or if we're all just pretending to get along and appeasing one another for comfort and habit's sake.

If he doesn't get your situation (that he helped to create), sit him down and explain in in simple terms without judgment. Explain how it makes you feel, what you have to deal with, how you view the future and your plans, how you're growing and planning (your savings show this), etc.

Then ask him to share his POV. If he stonewalls, don't let it go. If it's important to you, it should be to him too. If he shares his insecurities that's a good sign. Sometimes we're not always logical and rational beings. You both need to learn how to process your fears/insecurities in a way that don't harm your relationship. This is super important.

Finally, expectations. Outline them clearly, from both sides, and discuss when / if you can meet them. If you can't decide on expectations together then acknowledge the incompatibility and make plans that suit your needs.

All my friends quit lolita and they resent me for not quitting with them. If I bring up lolita than they groan and roll their eyes. One asked me to not bring it up anymore. What I find weird is that this only seems to apply to me. They are friends with other lolitas but they treat them differently.

>>10200054
If he keeps bringing up your faults then you should feel fine bringing up his. He should have expected all of this from what you've said.

>>10200065
oh god no. I don't criticize outfits, even on the ita threads, and I would never crash a lolita meet. I'm just the one telling you I like your coord at conventions! :)

>>10200060
>>10200061
For me it's only creepy if you are also participating and critiquing and throwing out your opinions etc just as if you wear it too. I'm a little hazy on why its a satisfying thing for you because my joy comes after all the tedious research etc when I have a coord ready and then I'm wearing it, getting ready and out at a meet or event.

>>10200081
I’m first anon that replied and I lurked for YEARS before actually getting into the fashion. Learning about it is really enjoyable, so I see the appeal. As long as they aren’t weird it’s fine, like you said. Plus, if they ever do get into the fashion they will have a much easier time than most newbies.

>>10200071
Your "friends" sound like assholes. Why are you wasting time with them?

>>10200081
NAYRT, but I can see why people like it. It's like learning about anything else without actually doing it. I watch Youtube videos about dip dying, resin pin making, jewelry construction, how it's made sort of stuff... do I actually go out and buy materials and do it? Nah. It's just fun to see what other people come up with.

>>10200086
Because it is hard to lose several friends at once without gaining new friends. There are still other events I'd like to go to with them like conventions and such. I don't really know what its happening either. At first only one wanted to quit and she kept talking about how great it was to have quit and then suddenly I was the only one left. With how it is now I wonder if they'd even stay friends with me if I do quit. It feels like and excuse to complain about me.

>>10200081
Pretty much how >>10200088 describes it. I like learning about a bunch of hobbies I'll never get into, because they're cool and they're aesthetically pleasing. I have too many hobbies of my own to invest time and effort into all the stuff that interests me, but I don't want that to stop me from appreciating and learning about it.

>>10200092
Nayrt, but what made them quit in first place? Do you feel they're disrespectful towards you outside of the Lolita talk context? And since you mentioned them being friends with other lolitas, how do your friends treat them compared to you?

>>10200102
I don't want to give to much info away about myself. I feel like I am no longer being included outside of lolita. They make plans without really including me and I feel like they talk more with each other than with me when we do hang out. They are also saying similar things to me that seem like little hints as if they have been talking about me behind my back. It's like that now they have quit that I am annoying for not quitting. I don't know exactly why they quit but I feel like if the first person hadn't quit the other wouldn't have either. They are still nice to other lolita friends and I find it weird that they did't have become less close even though that would have made more sense because they were less close to begin with and lolita was the main thing they have in common unlike with me.

>>10200071
Get some new lolita friends. Lolita has a high turnover rate and some don't even last 2 years. If you want to stay in it longterm, you're going to have to do this more than once. Also, you'll get lifetime lolita friends eventually who intend to stay in the fashion for life.

>>10200080
I would never be in this fashion if I had found cgl 4chan first. Brutal.

>>10200226
this reads like they’re looking for an excuse to freeze you out desu. even if you quit lolita they’d find another reason to exclude you. it’s time to move on

>Needed a cute basic chiffon blouse
>Buy a honey diamond blouse
>I actually really like it with my coordinate
>Wears it around on a warmer day, unfortunately sweats a little bit
>After the day is overwith I begin to shed my layers like the frilly reptile I am
>I notice a small black stain on the dress where my armpit was all day
>THE FUCKING BLOUSE COLOR TRANSFERRED TO THE DRESS (THAT IS PINK) AND IDK EVEN HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS.
The diamond honey blouse is pic attached, has anyone else had this issue or am I just retarded

>>10200333
Oof. I haven’t had this problem, but it is why you should wash your darks before you wear them. Jeans, for instance, will do this if they are dark and not pre-washed. A lot of clothes are pre-washed these days so people don’t know that.

>tfw dream dress finally arrives
man, I just really love lolita

>>10200333
as the other anon said, oof. I was seriously considering getting these too, But yeah you should've pre-washed it before you wore it out.

>>10200226
Ayrt here. Either they're slowly trying to get rid of you as >>10200251 said or or they are just interested in you as another sheep within their group, but either way you will likely not have much of a pleasant future there based on what you said. I mean come on

>calling you annoying for still being into lolita while they don't seem to have a problem hanging around their other lolita friends
>excluding you from group plans
>throwing snarky comments at you while also keeping a slight distance

is not what decent friends do to eachother. Find yourself some new people that treat you with respect. It's not easy to accept, but in the end it will be for your own good.

>>10200333 >>10200349
There are these sheets called "color catchers" that you can buy and throw into the washing machine with your clothes to test how much loose dye leaves the garment. If the sheet has absorbed dye after the first wash; don't worry. Do it again with a fresh color catching sheet. As long as there is clear progress (the sheets are progressively less saturated) then the garment will eventually stop bleeding. My record so far is I had to wash a chiffon black blouse 6 times before I got two clean sheets after the wash in a row.

In the "old days" (hard to say between when and when) garments that were not dryclean only would have been prewashed enough for this not to happen. Now a days, depending on the brand, a company might choose to forgo prewashing as a way to save money. A warning sign I notice is that dyes do have a smell; if there's a prominent smell to a garment that is not explainable to your nose, it might be a sign of excessive dye.

I accidentally tubgirl’d myself while in my favorite AP blouse. I had eaten an entire bowl of green chili pepper salsa for lunch and was gassy. As a joke I plopped down on my bed and held my knees to my chest to fart in front of my BF while undressing and... tubgirl’d my favorite blouse and the sheets.

>>10200515
press f

Weird feel.
gulls seem to care so much more about archiving the history of lolita, but it's reassuring to know that more than anywhere else, our board is one of the least at risk of falling into the same traps as every other platform.
Because other people value 4chan as a whole, and. value us enough for archiving ~this~
To take up precious bandwidth and server space.
In a way, it's cool that all of our conversations will remain, long after Insta, Tumblr and all the rest are gone, because of how nostalgic this place is.

I'm a little choked up about livejournal, but it's getting saved too, hopefully egl gets saved before the site shutters (which is soon).

>>10200423
And not even mentioning that the cheaper the item is, the more likely it's intentionally overdyed so it looks better on a rack or in pictures.
Never just wear your clothes before washing them first, how do you know it's even clean??

>>10200515
What the fuck? If this is not a joke then holy shit. What was your boyfriend's reaction to watching his girlfriend establish eye contact and then explosively shit all over herself and the bed?

>>10200584
He was probably turned on

>>10200515
Motherfucker.
I asked for this with my sappy bullshit.

>haven't worn lolita more than 2x a year for the last 3 years
>haven't gone to a meet in years
>haven't bought a new piece in years
>frequent cgl less and less each week
>browse LaceMarket daily, but more out of habit

The thought of my interest waning in lolita used to make me emotional- I thought, how could I ever fall out of love with this fashion, that means so much to me? I used to be obsessed. It was my life. I would go to meets, scour the secondhand markets for my dream dresses, travel to lolita cons, had a friend group of lolitas that I loved- we even had sleepovers.

I have none of that anymore. It started when I moved away, and I only found a few oddball friends who were interested in alternative fashions generally (none seriously into lolita) before I let those friendships fade. I don't have the energy, the time, or the desire to rekindle that passion for lolita anymore... It feels bittersweet. I do miss those days. I wonder if it's time to sell everything besides my dream dresses. The only thing really stopping me is the effort it'd take, but I worry about the value of them all dropping the longer I wait for something to change and for me to have a reason to have over ~30 pieces in my closet that barely see the light of day.

>>10200597
just wear it when you want for yourself. no need to wait for others. i'm sure your friends would get a kick out of it

>>10200022
I'm sorry but I know his type. He wants you simple, child bearing and money making. God forbid you have dreams/hobbies.

He's resenting you now for not meeting his standard of income. Wait till you're a full time mum & house wife, he'll control your social life too.

He'll want a joint account if you earn money and control every aspect of it. Before you know it you'll have 3 kids and too broke to break up, and the split will be nasty.

This guy doesn't see you as his equal right now. Imagine what it'd be like to be dependent on him. Frankly with his attitude I don't think he's ready to have a family unless you're up to being the little wife tgat revolves around him & the kids.

>>10200022
Please anon, for the love of god, just give yourself a good life.

I let my 14 and 17 year old sisters-in-law use my Amazon prime.
I found these items in my wishlist and I know I didn't put them there. One of them is thinking about a babbys first imaginary coord.

>>10200421
I had the same thing happen to me. Friend quit lolita and started acting cold to me. She forbade me from bringing up lolita around her. Then she got back into the fashion and was still acting cold to me.

>>10200081
>>10200088
>>10200094
I'm the first poster, thank you for your answers, like other anon said I will never critic, larp or go to a meet. But I kind of feel nosy when I ask lolita at con what are they piece when I don't know them . I have a too much hobbies too so it's probably that too.

I love lolita and I love collecting dresses, but I hate wearing it. All I can think of when I wear it is how uncomfortable I am and how I can't wait to go home and take it off again. I also somehow don't feel very "me" whenever I wear lolita because I just get so distracted by trying not to ruin my pretty dress I just can't fully express myself. It really sucks. I've tried many different styles/fabrics but somehow I always end up hating wearing lolita. Is this a sign I should just quit this hobby?

>>10200597
It's probably time to sell, anon. That must be a ton of closet space to pieces you wear that little.
You can always come back if you feel better. Plenty of lolitas have done that.

This entire board makes me sad.

I feel like all the girls here want to feel so badly like princesses, because nobody ever made them feel special before

>>10200732
Why are you uncomfortable? Do you regularly wreck your regular clothes that you’d be so afraid to ruin your lolita dresses? I don’t think these are a sign you should quit but these aren’t usually what people are worried about while wearing lolita so I’m wondering if your clothes fit ok and if you might just be dressing up too much and might like a more everyday kind of coord better?

>>10200732
Do you have any cheap dresses you could wear out with a fuck it attitude? Just give 0 ducks about ruining it and see if you enjoy it more that way?

>>10200740
If they want to feel more like princesses then they should act more like an actual princess and not a brat in frills because that princess feeling ultimately only comes from inside when people act with a noble and regal yet humble mindset and mostly good intentions, not from jealousy or petty drama. That chases away the very thing they desire and just makes them feel more unworthy.

>>10200740
>>10200770
le epic bait

>tfw ugly

>>10200740
I'd rather be the spoopy doll lady lurking and waiting in a dark backalley desu

>>10200829
sell your brand, buy surgery

>>10200740
No one here wants to fuck you, anon.

>>10200634
Aww that's cute! Are you a lolita yourself? If you are, you can take this as an opportunity to teach them about the fashion and bond with them.

>>10200634
>tfw even 14 y/os are skipping the ita phase these days

>>10200833
That’s oddly specific but now that you mention it, I’m down for this also.

>>10200833
Same. That's why I like old school.

>Tfw finally moving away from tiny shitty trailer to a real house with enough extra rooms/storage I can dedicate one as a Lolita/computer/sewing room
gulls I am HYPED

>>10200898
Grats, anon. Sounds like there’s a happy story there. Post in the room thread sometime, I’m really tired of seeing what look like teen bedrooms. I’m ready for some lolita craft/sewing spaces!

>>10200732
Whats uncomfortable about it specifically? Maybe try wearing cutsews more often or not wearing it on hot days. If the band of the petticoat is whats bothering you, sometimes I tuck my cutsew underneath the band so its not bothering my skin. Also wearing soft shorts as bloomers is alot more comfortable if its not a hot day.

If you're worried about ruining your dresses don't wear any that you're scared of ruining when you go out to eat messy foods. Plan your day ahead of time. Know which friends have pets and have some cheaper dresses that you're not afraid of potentially ruining. Getting some taobao dresses for this purpose has greatly helped with wearing lolita daily because I can wear them in more potentially dangerous situations and not worry about them.

>>10200851
Yes I am a lolita wear it pretty much whenever I go out for more than grocery shopping, and I hope I can find her a better blue bolero thing, the color match is a bit off. Though I know their parents might not be the happiest about me influencing them, oh well! Not sure how to broach it and find out which it is.

>>10199729
>go in a non weeb board
> ask normal stuff for the thread
>" muhuhu your country is full of n*gger why bothering

goddamn I forgot how this website is outside of cgl

>>10200954
what country? and what board?

>>10200954
/int/ and /sp/ sure are magical places.

>>10200954
But they aren't wrong

this is only tangentially /cgl/ related but fuck it

>join club at my uni
>start to make friends with people, hang out with them a lot
>a few days ago one of them confesses to me
>I'm not gay
>now everything is awkward and I just feel uncomfortable around this person
>he doesn't even do anything creepy but just him talking to me now irritates me so much more than anything else ever has.

How do I stop being disgusted with this person? I don't understand why I feel this way but I need to figure out how to get over it. I've kinda been stonewalling him every single time I've conversed with him since then but he's not a bad person and doesn't deserve for me to be a dick to him like this. Nobody else in the club knows that he confessed to me; I'm pretty sure he's still in the closet and I'm not enough of an asshole to out him just so I can get my feelings off my chest by talking to someone irl.

>>10200995
For dudes:
Uncomfortable + awkward = Angery

In most cases

You're upset you're in this situation, you don't actually hate him, you hate how this confrontation has othered you both from the rest of your friends.
Personally, I'd just make terrible jokes until everyone was on equal awkward footing, but I think yall just really need to get shitfaced and have a heart to heart the only way drunk people can.

>>10200333
Had this happen with a black bolero, it really messed up my cutsew and transferred a bit onto my dress as well. I hand washed it repeatedly until the water stayed clear but I still don't trust it over any especially expensive dress.

> Be lolita with huge holidays and events planned for May 2019
> Gained weight and aged in the face
> Did not fit into jfashion anymore. Too far gone.
> Left toxic family
> Boyfriend broke up right after
> biological dad died. All in 31 days.
> 3 months to get try to get through it, got holiday and lolita event coming up
> Didn't plan shit until the last week before jetting off.
> A handful of dresses still fit thank Chr*st.
> Booked a lifestyle photographer to commemorate the last time in jfashion before truly getting old/fat/ugly. Double chin & derp pics be damned.
> On the day of photoshoot it rained but did it anyway. Photographer loved the outfit and encouraged more outfit change, they were into it!
> Made an excuse that I had limited baggage but sad reality was I didn't fit into the planned one.
> No fucking clue if the poses were ok or what the hell my face was doing, didn't care, I was going out of lolita with a bang.
> Photographer chimed and praised I was like a model. Haha, don't tease an old lady please, and just said lolitas are posers, it becomes a natural reflex.
> Actually had a blast and the weather improved. Lots of laughs too.

> A week later, photographer made good on his promise and the pics came through.
> I cried. It was amazeballs. Perhaps a combination of good editing and my make up skills, whatever but I needed that.

I've hated my reflection for quite some time and felt so shit about life. But I'm so thankful that the photographer has helped restore some hope in the continuation of wearing what I love and my face is not as tragic.

Plus getting emotional support from friends so that helps with working things from the inside.

>>10200979
/sp/ and I'm french. I'm kind of stupid since the thread was full of creep rather than fan, it suck to like figure skating.

>>10201039
/sp/ isn’t an actual athletic forum. it’s a bunch of thirsty dudes who never leave their basement. find your local figure skating club and join a program. you’ll meet actual fans there.

>>10201044
>it’s a bunch of thirsty dudes who never leave their basement

this describes almost all boards on 4chan kek

>>10201062
It’s true, but particularly ironic for /sp/.

>>10200902
Thanks anon! I don't think I'll have much money to decorate for a while but I'm definitely going to lurk those threads now for some inspiration! I'm really excited to have my own space I've always had to share rooms with other people and it's exciting to have a room I can do whatever I want without anyone else's stuff in the way.

Anon who sold old dresses and re-invested in a new dress that fits my current lifestyle better (tl;dr I don't have as much income anymore, so I was having a hard time affording the dry cleaning bill on my main pieces) ... The package came in; I'm soo happy to have something that I can just wear and not worry about! I'm already planning coords around it; I made sure it's colors fit in with my old pieces that I sold off, so I could re-use all the accessories I already have.

Now I feel motivated to sell off even more stuff; even though I basically sold 3 dresses and bought one to replace the 3, it feels like I have more options because there's no more logistical worries to consider with when and where I wear Lolita.

Do you gulls ever feel this way; do you ever feel more excited to get rid of things after receiving the one perfect thing you were missing?

Another summer and I'm comfortably slipping back into bad habits. What the fuck am I? Where did all my hype go? I thought I wanted to sew.

>>10201177
When I bought my first dress with no print and it matched so many more accessories! I discovered I like sewn details like pintucks and ruffles more than all but my most favorite prints. So I’ve invested in a few more solid main pieces, avoided several bloodbaths, crossed so many prints off my wishlist and the few I still love are that much more special. Plus often solid dresses are not nearly as expensive, and often better made out of velvet or cotton fabric that I like better than the poly dresses and the chiffon prints. I’m rounding up about 10 print dresses to set for sale yet I feel my wardrobe is more versatile, not less.

>>10201263
Summer is only half over. Why not start a project now and re-dedicate your self to a sewing goal today?

I just asked a good friend and crush if he'd let me dress him up in lolita. he fucking said yes. I arfghfgbjfvju can't wait. I'm on Taobao shopping for shoes for him right now. I don't think he'll ever get into the fashion because it's ~expensive~ but this is close enough to my lolita bf dream.

>>10201386
Wait, you're spending your own money on this?

>>10201386
Buy things with shirring so you can wear them yourself when you’re done with whatever fetish this is...

Can I have a moment of silence for the op I ripped the chest of today while out at lunch because apparently I'm the fucking Hulk.

>>10201945
>powerbreasts

what op is it?

>>10201958
Star Emissary in Tranquil Dreamland by Fairy across the Wilderness

>>10201945
Stop squeezing into your things. The dress did this because it is several sizes too small for you and the fabric and seams could not take the strain...holy shit how do you do not realize this? Rip dress.

>>10201970
I've worn it for 4 years no problem. Today it gave up the ghost, I hope someone spills oil on your favorite dress for your lack of sympathy you fucking cunt.

I always try to make a effort to dress well to work but whats the fucking point if every time I spill something on myself during my lunch break like a dipshit

>>10201945
Looks like cheap tabao shit. Am I wrong?

>>10201945
RIP. Buy some navy thread and sew it.

>>10201986
but it was cute taobao shit and like, the fourth dress I ever got and one of the comfiest.

And no it's not my tits making it curve out, i'm holding it with my fingers like that because the rip isn't really visible if i let go because I did still have room in the bust. That's the part that baffles me. Maybe because I've worn it so many times in the four years I've had it. I hope it can withstand being resewn and isn't too obvious, there was 0 extra cloth in the seam, it was the very edge that was sewn there.

>>10201974
Try not eating like a child

>>10201945
Lose weight instead of squeezing into clothing that doesn’t fit

So this is the twitter search suggestions for #lolita

>>10202126
XYs were a mistake

>>10202130
i'm a man though...
I was uploading a picture of my coord when I noticed the tag suggestion.

I want to see a Ruby Rose cosplayer's bare ass irl. Is that wrong? I don't even watch RWBY.

I just want to be thin enough to wear Lolita/cosplay. I have so many ideas of what to wear, or who I should cosplay as, but right now I’m too fucking fat. I hate my arms and my double chin. I hate my thighs. I just want to be a cute anime girl and cut off all the fat on my body. I’ve already lost 12lbs but that’s not enough. I still have a long way to go before I can even attempt anything.

>>10202290
You've already made it this far. Don't give up!

>>10202290
Hey anon. I'm not going to give you any false positivity about weight and health, but I hope you can treat yourself kinder. Having weight loss goals is great, and wanting to fit into cute clothing is definitely a valid reason for wanting to lose weight! But it sounds like you really hate yourself right now, and I hope that as you work on your physical health, you also work on your mental.

It's all too easy to link your worth as a person to your weight, but that runs the risk of creating a pattern of self loathing that persist after the weight has been lost. It makes it easier for a minor slip up (oh darn, that meal had more calories than I thought) to cascade into a hateful spiral (I'm already worthless and fucked up my diet, who cares if I eat this whole thing of ice cream). Even if you're overweight, try to make a habit of finding things you like about yourself, and consider yourself a valuable person worthy of love. Eating the right foods, working out, and making healthy choices is an act of self love, and that will get you to the body you desire. I wish you the best of luck as you continue to lose weight, but make sure you learn to love yourself on the way!

>>10202290
can't see your thighs in lolita anyway so don't worry too much about those

Finally went to a meet today and everyone there seemed awesome! All types of coords and styles. Met a girl who was absolutely adorable in every way and I totally have a lolita friend-crush on her. So excited to see more of this group. <3

Is a con a good place to look for a gf?
I know women are basically tired of guys wanting to date them in every context, but I can't imagine a better one.

>>10202290
Youre doing great already if you’ve lost 12ibs!! Don’t loose hope! Eat what you want and like in moderation (eat that slice of cake! Just one during the week won’t hurt you) and exercise in a way that won’t hurt you long term!
Going through a weight loss journey like this already as an adult (I assume) is also teaching you ways to live your life healthily! Find a diet and excersising routine that can be kept up with no matter what and once you get to your ideal weight all you have to do is let go just a little bit so you can maintain it for, well forever basically. This is what I ended up doing 4 years ago and I lost upwards of 20kg (over the course of a year) and have kept it off. I’m glad I did bc I’ve been happier, more active, and just all around better ever since. Results don’t come immediately and you should take every pound lost as a victory. You’re doing good so keep it up!

>>10202290
If your BMI is over 35, you qualify for bariatric surgeries like lapband, gastric balloon etc. They result in rapid weight loss. Just an option if you dislike how slowly weight loss goes otherwise.

I want back to Japan.

>>10202438
This isn't the stupid questions thread.

I'm assigned female at birth but have an extremely "masculine" body. I'm wide (shoulders, ribcage) and tall with a strong jaw. I struggle with feeling comfortable in looks not bordering to a classic/vintage feel. But even so it's hard to find pieces to wear - brand OPs didn't fit me even back when I had an anorexic BMI. Puffy sleeves makes my shoulders look wider than an 80s business woman. Tea parties makes my feet look clowny. I'm so jealous of people who can do sweet/decora/OTT/experimental cutesy coords and look just adorable. I own ONE sweet print but everytime I wear it I just feel in ita territory simply because I'm not cute enough to wear it. I love colors with some pop to it (like the green in pic related) but I feel like I can't wear it because it's too much for someone with my proportions. Can anyone relate and does anyone have any tips on how to feel/present cuter?

>>10202509
Get over it and wear things that flatter you. Anyone who wants to look good has limitations on what they can wear. I love gothic but it looks terrible on me so I stick to sweet.

Out shopping with a friend, it's about halfway through the day and I'm starting to feel a bit frumpy and need to adjust my coord and touch up my makeup. Normally said friend goes to the toilet twice as often as I do so I decide I'll just suck it up until she needs to go, I'm having fun anyway.
She finally mentions we should find a bathroom, can't wait to preen and get comfy again but no, we go get lunch instead. Another hour passes and I'm feeling less cute and my pettis bunching weirdly, I make what adjustments I can without a mirror while she mentions the toilet again, but then we get distracted.

I don't realise until we've parted ways that I still probably look like a slob and there's no bathroom in sight, but by this point I don't care anymore, I'm just glad no-one asked for a photo.

Retrospectively I could have said I needed to go myself but imo it's a bit vain hunting down a mirror just to fix my eyeliner.

>>10202542
This is me at every end of the day lmao. After 12 hours of lolita you just dgaf anymore.

>>10202509
How 'masculine' are we talking? Could you maybe lurk the brolita thread for makeup/styling tips if it's that bad? Otherwise I wouldn't worry, wear what you want, Lor has a pretty strong jaw and she still rocks sweet when she's not being a fucking clown. Not everyone is going to fit the dainty uwu stereotype you seem to affix to sweet and to expect as much is pretty unrealistic.

>>10202509
>strong jaw
>wide shoulders
>masculine
>anorexic BMI
Just become a normie fashion model and get too rich to care what people think

>>10202509
it's all about the visuals, anon. with skill you can absolutely look good in sweet, or any cute femme style. find wigs and hairstyles that soften the appearance of your jaw (longer hair if your jaw is on the wider side; thick and jaw-length if you have a longer face). practice makeup application that widens&brightens your eyes and makes your lips soft and pouty.
being wide up top is actually great because you can give yourself a fantastic silho by layering pettis for a big skirt shape.

I'm a biiiig bitch myself (~47cm shoulder width) but my hourglass proportions really save me. large peter pan collars and incorporating vertically-aligned details in your coords minimize the appearance of your shoulder and draw the eye downward, making you look long instead of stocky/wide.
You can do it, anon. it just takes practice. you'll be so cute! experiment with makeup and prints that would flatter you.
>like pic related

>>10202531
I'm contemplating this to some degree. If I play the playful prints down with modest coordinates it might look more flattering. I just don't want it to look unbalanced.

>>10202550
Got "sir"ed a lot before cutting bangs +starting to wear makeup daily. Wore men's clothing at those occasions, to be fair. I read a lot of brolita tips when I starting out but I have only come across except the occasional one the last few years.

>>10202557
Haven't had that kind of BMI in 4 years. Thinking that was the one look I could aim for made me miserable. Just bringing it up to establish that losing weight won't help me fit brand or make my shoulders come off as more dainty.

>>10202558
Thank you for your suggestions. I think getting hime style bangs helped some. Really want to up my makeup game! I do love angelic pretty jsks like that one, but their waist hit so far above my waist that I barely get to keep any hint of feminine shape. I have two solid ones on my to-alter list.

>>10201945
I mean at least it's a clean rip across the seam so it's an easy fix?

i keep getting accused of self posting or posting long rants about myself on this board and it's really getting to me. i think someone's genuinely trying to make me out to be a bad person when all i really want is good friends and frilly dresses. i know i just gotta ignore it but holy shit it's hard when for months your names being slandered over what seems is just some stupid vendetta

>>10202735
Welcome to 4ch newfag

>>10202743
posting long rants pretending to be someone you aren't, is normal cgl behavior? why haven't i seen this with other people?

>>10202745
You probably have and just don’t know it. If it’s happened to you it’s happened to others. In fact, that’s actually a pretty common complaint for anyone who has 1000+ followers on IG. My friend has had it happened to her too.

>>10202746
oh well i don't even have half that many followers and i don't even think my coords are even good enough to get this kind of attention. i usually don't even get a lot of likes on my cof posts so it just doesn't make a lot of sense to me. i think i know who it is, and she's done a lot of other stuff regarding my friends. i just blocked her and want to let it die, but i guess she won't let it die

>>10202753
You aren’t special nobody cares. This isn’t anything shocking or new for this board. Get over it.

>>10202757
just as i'm sure people posting in the feels thread about it isn't new either lol

>>10202757
Hm.
Something's got your panties in a knot.
You know something about OP she didn't say in her og post.
You the faggot?
>>10202753
Go to meets, enjoy yourself, show in action you aren't the person whatever salty cuntoid is making you out to be.
It's not normal behavior unless we're just letting vendetta posting be normal.

It's a tough stone to get over, but for now just deny you even know about it and try to move on.

>>10202762
No, just tired of newfags acting like they’re uwu victims over stupid basic /cgl/ behavior

>>10201972
Oil is easy you fucking mistake.

>>10202767
This is the feels thread.
Get over it or not, but being faux hard is worse than just ignoring them.

>>10202778
The first post was fine but acting like she’s the only person to experience it? Nah fuck off. Whiny cunt.

>>10202779
No?
They were responding to the claim it's based on follow count, which as she states is very unlikely.
People ask for advice how to deal with shit like this pretty often, it's nothing new as you've said, so what's your deal anon.
Go fuck off to another thread if you can't bring yourself to watch another newbie cry into the wind.

>>10202779
>projecting this hard over absolutely nothing
Aren't you supposed to be in school?
Get off your phone before the TA confiscates it.

>>10202785
>misusing buzzwords

Sure is summer

>>10202781
You need to work on your reading comprehension, scroll back up and reread.

>>10202791
It’s probably that girl samefagging to defend herself

>>10202791
>this is common /cgl/ behavior
It generally isn't, but it happens.
>'Why haven't I seen this with other people'
Yes, comes across as very whiny, what a cunt right?
>>10202797
Lol k
The only constant has been some newfag acting all internet tough guy over some other newfag's problem.
Your insults are cheap, as are you.

>>10202815
Wipe the salt out of your cunt any day now

>>10202815
for someone who isn’t the OP you sure are getting upset about this

>>10202822
One could say the same of the mess that's been at this all afternoon. I just got here.

>>10202824
Sure jan

>>10202824
you do realize it’s been several people involved in the conversation right? and that’s it’s been less than two hours?

>>10202753
Sounds like you're one of the discordfags desu

I want to lead a classy and sophisticated life but I feel like I live with wolves and I don’t know how to be the bigger person day in and day out without ever cracking apart. I want to be the better person who never gets into arguments, who always celebrates special occasions by giving cards and presents. I want to leave people happier than they were when I met them. I want to exist easily, with grace and serenity. I want a garden, tea parties, high end fashion, good books and good food, and sweet friends.
But I’m fucking stressed, I’m forgetful, I’m poor, I embarrass myself in front of others and people treat me like I’m some kind of insect they should squish on the ground whenever given the opportunity.
My job is important, but involves physical violence and cleaning other people’s shit. My friends are growing more sedentary and take my attempts to improve myself as personal attacks. My family thinks trucks and flat screen TVs are status symbols, and I’m in the wrong for wanting anything else.
I just can’t believe this is what my life has become. I want to be so much better but every attempt is slapped down by my environment and it HURTS. I feel like I’m killing off parts of myself to avoid conflict with the people I love.
I know I should find better friends and I should move away, I fantasize about it all the time but that kind of drastic change just isn’t a financial possibility. Not to mention leaving my job would seriously hurt a lot of people.
I guess I just wish I knew how to maintain a cosmopolitan air despite my embarrassingly lower-middle class trappings.

>>10203107
Move.

For some reason I have a huge mental hurdle that won't let me commission anything - wig, outfits, props - and I try to avoid buying anything totally premade if possible.
A huge part of why I enjoy cosplay is the building process - researching and finding reference, problem solving "how do I pull this off?", modifying and tweaking something to get it to fit...

But even now that I'm approaching cosplays that are way too complex or difficult for me, I still don't want to commission or just buy them, even if the results would be exactly what I'm looking for (and probably cheaper in the long run).

>tfw bid on a dress i've wanted for long time
>tfw get sniped at the last second
>get home from work and check lm like usual
>see the dress relisted by the same seller for more expensive

>>10203220
name and shame

Back in May I posted about trying to lose weight before AX. I've lost roughly 15lbs since then. I remember a couple of people were voicing their concerns, but I'm really proud of myself. I still have a long way before I hit my goal, but it feels good.

>>10203293
how tf did you lose that much that fast?

>>10203260
She's one of the regular scalper-chans

>>10203296
> No eating after 8:00PM / Dinner is last meal
> Skip breakfast on some days, have a "better" breakfast on others
> Try to actually work out (started with 1-2 mile walks after work)
> Cut out snacking

I'm not starving or fully dieting- If I want to eat something I know is junk food, maybe I'll treat myself or I'll wait a bit and see if I'm still craving said thing after a while and not a passing "oh that sounds good." It's really just willpower and I'm pretty sure I was eating when I got bored.

My old breakfasts were shit like poptarts or muffins, now I just cook some eggs. For sweets, I switched from a lot of processed things (again, poptarts) to whipped cream and fruit or peanut butter. I actually make the effort to order the healthier options at restaurants. Diet wise, low carb/keto stuff can also help with a more rapid weight loss and made me feel more full, but I'm not strict on that.

>pic related is a great, filling sweet too

>>10202161
Well, as long she is legal...

>>10202509
>assigned female at birth
no, you were born as one
(unless you were an aphrodite, and your parents decided that you should be girl)

>>10202509
>>10203354
*Hermaphrodite

>warmest time of the year
>accidentally drop heavy load to your leg
>luckily nothing broke but it left big ass bruises
>can't wear ankle socks because of it
>OTKs or tights will be too hot
>mfw I can't be kawaii this summer

>>10203356
The word is intersex

>>10203357
Makeup.

>>10202290
>>10202294
>>10202297
>>10202398
>>10202465
thank you all for your kind words and advice, I’m doing better now. I’ve been dealing with some family issues and my weight and everything built up together. I still have a long road ahead of me, but I’m getting very close to my first goal! Thank you all again!!
>>10202470
My BMI isn’t that high but you promoted me to check and I’m slowly getting out of the obese range so yay thank you anon.

Good to know gulls are still just a bunch of depressing idiots in the summer months, still having trouble getting boyfriends ladies?

>>10203408
Put the fork down fatty

tfw you buy a dress/blouse that includes your measurements in the "range" (partial shirring) but it fits literally everywhere except your cow tits. It's even worse when you're only 3-4 cm away. I want to cry.

Keep in mind that if you have a lot to lose you will lose more quickly than smaller people. If you are already a healthy weight, 15 lbs in one month is absolutely insane. Also, most of it was probably water weight since when you reduce sodium intake you will not be as bloated.

>>10203423
>15 lbs in one month is absolutely insane

It really isn’t, it’s completely doable. It depends on CICO and is probably not the healthiest rate to lose weight but it isn’t “insane” or undoable

>>10203423
That would be easy if you started walking a ton each day. When I was 19 I got a job that took me from walking 2 miles a day to 20, and I lost that within a month with a starting weight of 130 at 5’5”. So nowhere near over weight

>>10203107
You can't take care of others until you take care of yourself. You say that leaving would hurt others, but you are also showing that staying is turning you into the exact opposite of the kind of person you want to be. So staying won't fix that at all, no matter how painful change might be in the short term.

Start by getting better friends. Also don't try to appease other people's feelings just to avoid them treating you like shit. That is enabling them, beating you down, and honestly not lifting anyone up because if they treat you like that, I guarantee they do it to others, too.

When you have self respect and self sufficiency for yourself, then you will be in a position to help others. Not before. Even with whatever your job is, you are only putting a bandaid on the wound while it continues to fester instead of heal.

Get out. Improve your mental health and then you will have all the time in the world to find new ways to help people, but not if you remain a doormat. Being strong and confident emotionally does not equate to being rude. Jackasses just don't like their punching bags to talk back.

>>10203423
It's mostly water weight that initially gets shed.

>>10203107
The 'cosmopolitan' lifestyle is being eternally stressed in a tiny apartment and dealing with shitty people all day in a meaningless job. It's wearing nothing but drab business casual and drunken hookups in bars. 'Lower middle class' is actually closer to your ideal. Get yourself a nice cottage with a garden, host tea parties and book clubs, and spend your extra money on cute clothes.

>>10199868
you never know if you’re still going to be into lolita as you age. It’s kind of dumb to make a big financial decision like a house based on if a lolita comm is nearby. If you plan on having kids, you likely won’t fit into burando anymore. If there’s drama in the comm (trust me it’ll happen, it’s a fucking comm), you’ll want to leave especially if they know where you live. But you can’t because you decided to buy a home solely if a lolita comm is nearby.
Resin is toxic but you don’t need a whole separate room for it. I have pets and I put my materials away and clean the area. You really just need a crafting table. And to learn how to keep your priorities straight.
Also unless you’re married or have a lot of money, which it seems like he doesn’t, then don’t plan on kids yet.
It seems like neither of you are ready for a commitment like moving in together.
Big tip: don’t co-sign anything. And don’t burden your boyfriend because of your hobbies like finding a damn comm.

>>10200333
I take it you didn’t wash it first
Protip for any clothes, as soon as you buy it whether its brand new from the store, online, used, etc. wash it.
I mean seriously this is basic I’ve-been-doing-my-laundry-since-middle-school knowledge

>>10201028
I really hate double chins. Even at my bulimia thin phase, I had a slight chin.
Now i went through the same weight gain and my jfashion doesnt fit my tits.

>>10202290
Try less carbs/counting macros and 1 mile at least in walks or jogs everyday.
I got to my small waist size again from doing that.

>>10203357
I thought you meant you shit yourself

>>10203434
>20 miles a day
How? I'm skinnyfat so I could stand to lose some weight. I should walk more... I only get in around 3 miles a day.

>get excited for a cosplay
>plan everything
>look through pics of other cosplayers
>realize how much of a fucking clown I'll look and how it'll just be a waste of time and money
>give up and cry

>>10203698
Try it. I've worn cosplays that I thought I looked dumb in, but posted them on social media anyways and people loved it and thought I looked great.
Either you need to look good, or your cosplay needs to look good. Most people only care if its one or the other, doesn't need to be both.

>>10203434
sorry for derailing, I know this isn't /fit/, but does walking really do anything at all? I have tachycardia that I can't fix because I'm a poorfag and public health service is shit, and things like running knock me the fuck out, but walking fast and hiking seems to be fine.

>>10203735
If you do enough walking it does. I wasn’t trying to lose weight and I didn’t change anything else, no cutting back on any kind of food or anything like diet pills. Ate the same meals. Just walked a ton because it was my job to. By the end of the month I had to replace most of my non lolita wardrobe.

You can use online calculators to see how much you’d burn per mile. It fluctuates by your weight and height I’m pretty sure.

>>10203695
It was my job to. I basically walked around for 8 hours straight.

>>10200022
He may both think "you deserve a good life" and also be frustrated that he doesn't get to keep more of his pay check.

>ordered something
>this must be cute
>package has come, it was another 'slightly' highweist

Why am I always fail in this trap

>>10200732
I am also very particular about how clothes feel and make me feel, to the point where I get anxious if I don't plan my day accordingly (what kind of places I'll be in, transit or driving, foods I will be eating). I noticed that chiffon is one of the fabrics I am comfortable in the least, especially printed chiffon/light fabrics because I get so worried over snags or stains. Now I usually reserve my chiffon pieces to fancier outings.

I found wearing cutsews instead of blouses helped with my anxiety over it, as well as utk and ankle socks which I just treat as regular socks. They're also easily replaceable.

I like cheaper dresses for more toned down, solid coords for daily wear. I don't feel like I have to be more ginger with how I navigate the world if it's just cheap shit. I have some plain solid brand jsks for this that were like $50-$90 USD secondhand. Most Bodyline / Taobao stuff feel like garbage, but wearing a cutsew to separate the polyester helps. Basically just echoing everything >>10200930 said already.

In terms of style, I felt the same way you do. It might help to identify what aspect of lolita had drawn you into the fashion? My wardrobe had started to veer down the classic path, (high neck collars and neck bows and jabots), and it started feeling like I was wearing something that wasn't for me, like it was a costume. I made a couple of changes and additions when I realized I was actually more drawn to the youthfulness and "idyllic countryside" vibes. Stuff like more peter pan collar cutsews, gingham dresses and skirts, straw hats and bags, more lace socks, accessories, etc.

Another thing that really helped was getting comfier shoes.

>see cute jsk on mercari for a good price
>ok i'll buy it
>Japonica messages me: "you know there's a tiny ass stain on this right?"
>I respond 2 minutes later "yes please buy it"
>hours pass, nothing from japonica
>I have spent so much money on japonica orders if you guys screw me....
>dress sells
>literally 8 hours after i confirm i get an email "sorry we missed it"
>fuuuuuck you japonica

>>10204291
How much have you actually spent? Unless you spend like $2000 a month with them they don’t prioritize you

>>10204298
yeah I don't spend that much . I spend about 500 a month. Still sucks. Usually they are much faster with me.

>>10204291
this is why i stopped using them for anything time-sensitive desu

>>10204302
What service do you use for more urgent orders?

>>10204301
That’s really not a lot of money, especially not to a service who assists so many people like Japonica. There are people who drop more than that on a single item from them. You’re thinking about this from a very biased perspective. Look at it like this, you have tons of orders coming in, and you have to pick who to prioritize. Would you pick the customer who drops thousands with you each month, or the one who only spends a few hundred?

>>10204306
Yeah, I get that. It was a joke post, and I'm not that mad at them. I exaggerated to be a bit funnier about it. There's no need to be defensive.

>>10203431
I meant insane as in, don't do it it's not sustainable. 15 lbs to start is fine because it's probably water weight, but if you're consistently losing 15 lbs a month... yeah you're definitely starving yourself unless you're obese.

>>10203434
20 miles a day is insane for anyone not in a physically demanding job. If your job doesn't force you to walk, it's better to just assume you'll lose at a rate of 4-6 lbs a month if you're cutting back on food and increasing exercise.

>>10204320
It’s not, calm down fatty.

>>10204322
Today I learned that walking 20 miles everyday is a sustainable and logical solution to weight loss

>>10204324
You said that increasing exercise helps you lose weight but somehow you’re triggered at walking a few miles an hour for a while. Believe it or not, 5 miles is the encouraged MINIMUM to walk a day. And in places like some in the EU it’s not uncommon to get to everywhere by foot, and that number is probably nothing to them.

>>10204320
>>10204322
I know you're trolling, but that's 6 hours of walking a day. Like the other anon said, that's really unreasonable if you don't work a demanding job. people have jobs, lives, or school.

>>10204331
>trolling

Are you really so unhealthy that you think that’s impossible/undoable? Like anon said >>10204329 walking that much isn’t uncommon outside of America.

>>10204331
It’s really not unreasonable to the rest of the world burger-chan

>>10204334
>>10204335
I'm not American.

>>10204331
I can walk a mile in 15 min if I’m being leisurely. 15 x 4 = 60(one hour) so that’s four miles an hour. 20/4 is 5. I’m wondering how out of shape you are that it takes you so long to walk a mile?

>>10204336
So you’re just obese?

>>10204338
I just googled "how long does it take to walk a mile". We use kilometres here, so I don't know how long it takes to walk a mile. It's funny how you guys make fun of people for being american, but you out yourself as soon as you use miles.

>>10204336
What’s your excuse then? Because walking that much in a day isn’t hard. I walk 7 miles to work each day and 7 miles back. And in between I add in another 4-6 depending on the day. I don’t have a physically demanding job.

>>10204339
The conversation was centered around miles dumbass why wouldn’t we use miles

>>10204334
Not only is it completely unnecessary for anyone to walk for 20 miles every day (if they don't have to), it's also horrible for your joints. If you're that desperate to lose weight quickly, just adjust your calories accordingly.

Instead of walking for 20 miles, I suggest riding a bike, swimming, body weight exercises, yoga, etc.

Consistency is the most important part of weight loss. No one will consistently walk 20 miles a day unless it's their job or they literally have to.

>>10204342
>walking is bad for you

Fat logic

>>10204344
Walking isn't bad you, retard-chan. Anything is excess is bad for you. If you walk 20 miles a day, good for you. The rest of us will find maintaining a normal workout routine suits us much better.

>>10204342
most people who aren’t fat don’t have to worry about their joints

>>10204345
You just said walking 20 miles was bad for your joints dumbass

>>10204341
I never said we shouldn't use miles, but Americans are the only ones who use miles, and I imagine they're also the only ones really fimilar with that unit of measurement. I've never thought of how many miles I walk, ever.
You people get so angry about such mundane things. Like walking.
>>10204340
Well, I never said I don't walk. I'm saying that for the average person, walking twenty miles a day is unreasonable because they have to do other things, like work, go to school, socialise with friends...Also there are other ways to exercise other than just walking. People also go to the gym.

>>10204347
Key word: 20 miles a day. Walking a 5-6 miles a day is good for your heart. 20 is excessive. Literally do anything else.

>>10204349
It’s not that much if you aren’t out of shape.

>>10204351
Stop backtracking fatass

>>10204353
I'm sorry you're illiterate.

>>10204352
nayrt but im out of the house from 7:45am to 7:30pm with a commute that isn’t walkable. do you seriously suggest i do nothing but walk until 1am and then go to sleep for work every day? it’s just not fucking sustainable for some people, goddamn.

>>10204354
Sorry you’re too retarded to stick to one argument and have to backtrack and strawman to seem like you have a galaxy brain

>>10204352
Look, I know you won't believe me if I tell you I'm healthy. I do go to the gym everyday and I work an intensive job for about 8 hours a day. If I'm arguing 20 miles a day is excessive, It doesn't matter how many anecdotes I fling at you. I'm pretty certain most of you guys are lying about how much you walk everyday (Yes, it's unreasonable, and unhealthy to walk 20 miles a day) considering how defensive you are about it. Even then, going to the gym is better for you than walking long distances. You can focus on specific training there, and you can get more intensive training, and you don't have to go for a walk for 5-6 hours a day.

>>10204358
My only actual argument was that for anyone not forced to do so, 20 miles a day is unnecessary and will not promote consistency. If you're starting out or want to get fit, choose literally anything else. Walking is fine, don't overdo it or you won't want to go again the next day. Aim for something you can do for the rest of your life.

For some people, walking 20 miles a day is something they can do for their whole life. Obviously they're in the minority.

>>10204345
The idea is that anon has a job where by the end of the day, they've put in as many steps as 20 miles worth, maybe the tool they use is a little wonk but that sounds right for culinary.
No one said it would work for everyone.

>mfw fat people unironically think it’s “insane” to walk 20 miles a day

Sounds like none of you have gone to a university with a large campus

>>10204366
sounds like you don’t have a job

>>10204365
There's tons of people in this thread calling anyone who doesn't walk 10-20 miles a day obese lol.

>>10204366
stop lying about how much you walk because you're scared of being called fat.

It really sounds like you guys haven't heard of the 10,000 step goal, which is pretty common in active circles. That's 5 miles, not 20, which is the recommended amount of miles you're supposed to go everyday. (90 minutes of walking). And that plan of walking originated in Japan, not America.
You guys are such roleplayers.

>>10204361
Except for it’s not “unnecessary”, and it’s not unhealthy. Unless someone is overweight and then has joint issues. But the average person to walk 20 miles a day isn’t overweight. Your feelings do not change facts.

>>10204373
can you provide a reliable source for these facts?

>>10204367
Why is it bad for a college student not to have a job? My family isn’t poor so I don’t need to

>>10204372
That’s the minimum recommended and it sounds like you’re just trying to stir shit because we aren’t discussing walking 10,000 steps a day, and it was only brought up once as an example. It’s not the focus of the discussion

>>10204373
So you're telling me you walk 140 miles a week? While working full time and with an un-walkable commute? That's commendable not definitely not the average person's experience.

>>10204376
I had a discussion with my doctor about it, I’m sure you can google it. Since you seem to be so upset by it I’m sure you’ll want to see for yourself

>>10204377
>>10204371

>>10204385
That sounds like projection, that you’re so fat you can’t believe people are capable of walking a healthy amount

>>10204377
The point is that spending 4-6 hours walking every day is more practical for someone without a full time job.

>>10204377
That's not the minimum. that's the recommended amount. People who are working on weight loss do go over, but they certainly don't walk 20 miles. The reason I bring it up isn't to deflect, but because you're only supposed to walk that much to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Stop lying about how healthy you are. it's pathetic.

>>10204389
>people who exercise more than me must be lying!!

Jesus Christ, this is some intense denial.

>>10204388
A lot of jobs involve walking that much a day, like medicine/culinary/parks jobs and many more. It’s more than reasonable for someone to take enough steps to hit the 20 mile mark. The people denying that must live very sedentary lives

>>10204387
20miles is not healthy

>>10204391
Jobs, sure, not walking around your university campus.

>>10204395
Are you mentally retarded? This conversation has involved multiple people advocating that 20 miles is doable since yesterday. Not everyone who you speak to on 4ch is the same person. And people who go to college can recognize that there are professions that involve a lot of walking. Stop being intentionally dense.

>>10204395
there are campuses so large I wouldn’t be surprised at all if a student walked that much to classes in a day, but since you probably didn’t go to college or you went to a community one I can see how you’re confused

i wonder how much of the thread is fatty-chans roleplaying with each other right now

>>10204400
Most of it looks to be fatty-chans upset by exercise

>>10204391

what started this whole shitshow:

>20 miles a day is insane for anyone not in a physically demanding job.

I don't have a problem with people with demanding jobs. If your job makes you walk that much, ok, just eat well so you don't lose too much muscle.

For the rest of us, there's no real need to walk that much. 140 miles a week is unnecessary unless you're training for a marathon or have a demanding job. You're not a "fatty-chan" or "an obese American" if you think it's stupid to walk that much, you're just a normal person.

Go to the gym, eat well, don't over complicate it.

Nice /cgl/-related feels you have there.

>>10204402
>you’re just a normal person

Sure Jan, keep telling yourself that. Maybe if you repeat it enough you’ll get everyone else to be a lazy slug like you.

>>10204402
the person responding to that specified she had a demanding job, and then some fatass got upset over it. and now here you are reeeing about it and other examples given in this thread

>>10204401
found one

>>10204420
Stop projecting

Gulls are physically unable to stop swallowing bait.

>>10203735
Fix your diet. Weight is at least 80% diet. Calculate your TDEE at ’sedentary’ for your goal weight, eat that in unprocessed food daily. Drink water, cut sugar out. You'll lose.

Plenty of people never exercise at all to lose, they just diet. It's still good to the minimum exercise required to be healthy which is equal to about 30 minutes, 3x/week but it doesn't matter what kind, it can be in small time amounts etc. .

The idea that you can continue to eat a shit diet and just exercise to lost your weight makes so many fail.

>>10204372
People act like this is so hard but its really not. A lot of phones now even have apps pre installed that count your steps (I know my Huawei does) and I can do my 10k walking to work, running around doing a busy retail job and walking back ( also not counting walking my dog and other things.)
I know a lot of folks from the states dont walk much especially if they live in fuck no where so they can't walk to a local shop or something. You just take a walk around your block, listen to a podcast, some music and get off 4chan for a little while it might do you some good all around.

>>10204446
It's not hard, just time consuming if you have sedentary job. I got my 10k by walking before work, at my job's rooftop during lunch, and after work but I was still sometimes short by 1-2k steps. My job basically requires me to be glued to my computer for 9 hours.

I didn't start seeing results until I added other workouts like strength training/biking on the weekends. I don't walk much anymore (got too annoying having to plan it) but I'm fit anyway because I go to the gym and eat well.

Walking is good if you can do it, but don't cry if you can't. Just do something else physical and eat right.

>>10204450
As long as you can swap out the 10k for something else I see no issue. Especially if you have a job that requires you to be in one spot. I also think people forget you can work out quite well at home if you don't have time/money for a gym membership.

>>10199868

Fucking hell women are insane loool

Protip brah no guy wants to die childless, giving you the real fucking truth no matter what your BF tells you

Super irritated rn, not sure who is the bitch or not.

Coworker was talking about tinder and mentioned casually how her bf instantly swiped left on girls with Snapchat filter pics because "he doesn't like superficial girls". Naturally, I got offended because I had a few Snapchat filter pictures on my tinder and I am pretty sure I'm not a superficial basic bitch (hint: I'm on fucking 4chan right now) and she got mad at me and said "that's just his preference!"

Should I have taken that as a personal attack or not? She toed the line afterward trying to defend why using Snapchat filters / being an insta ho makes you superficial and then backed off saying "I'm not saying you're superficial" like GURL YOU JUST DID

>>10204517
Not to mention the concept of "REAL" vs "fake" girls is problematic as all hell

>>10204465
That’s because all you men have insane egos and think the world really needs a more copies of your retard genes

>>10204517
Did you tell her before hand that you used the filters?

>>10204517
men swipe left on filtered tinder pics because they don't want to get catfished. they'd like to see the actual appearance of the person they're trying to fuck. don't take it so personally.

>>10204431
We need a mass lobotomy at this point

>>10204524
Not all of my pics were Snapchat filters, probably 1 or 2. Also had some slutty pics b/c I was on to fuck (coincidentally, I ended up meeting the love of my life from this profile- luckily he didn't saw "ew basic skank bye")

>>10204523
No I did not. She didn't know she was insulting me from the beginning, but the impression I got afterwards is that she didn't really care lol

>>10204528
Then no, I'd say it wasn't a personal attack at all. She had no way of knowing.

>>10204528
Sounds more like she was just defending her BF, not attacking you, especially if she didn't know beforehand that you had some of the filters on your pics.

>>10204517
You wouldn't want his approval anyways, he's probably one of those guys who thinks women owe it to them to be attractive, but also thinks they're superficial and shallow if they actually let on that they work hard at being attractive. You know, the kind of guy who thinks it's attractive when a woman orders a greasy steak ("real food") instead of a salad, but only provided she's already magically thin somehow. If his girlfriend is defending that behavior she's likely a "not like those other girls" type of girl.

>>10204533
>>10204532

You're probably right. I just got suspicious of the fact that she was defending his reasons after I told her I used Snapchat filters, meaning she probably thinks the same thing.

>>10204535
Jesus, this. I'm going to be a bitch for a second because it's too mean to tell anyone I actually know- she mentioned how on the first date they spent hours talking about scifi books and movies, which made me guffaw internally because every movie she's ravingly recommended to me has been so over budgeted and surface level. Like okay if you're into girls with shit taste in sci fi then I shouldn't feel that bad that you'd think I'm superficial...

>>10204528
you sound insane if you think she pre-emptively knew and was trying to insult you.i wouldn't care afterward either if you were crazy enough to overreact

Personally I would never ever date someone who used tinder

>>10204574
same

>>10204517
>i'm not superficial you know that because i'm on 4chan uwu
people literally get mad here because someone's eye is slighting drooping is this a joke

>>10204574
Lol why? Yeah I've seen some gym rat/ Guido/ rednecks on tinder, but I've also met guys on tinder who are funny, super smart, interesting, okay+ looking, and successful. Especially in my area, there are a ton of kind hearted lonely nerds who just want to meet new people because their own circles are either too close to date from or people are taken. I've learned that there is literally nothing tinder men all have in common besides they want some kind of relationship, whether hookup or otherwise

>>10204399
I love when people assume things about me in an attempt to insult me. I'm anon, and also you're totally wrong. I went to university and going to university or college isn't as prestigious as you seem to think it is. At least when you aren't in america and dropping fat stacks just to get a shitty education. I think you guys just don't know how to measure distances. 20 miles is fucking far, and i'm not walking 5hrs everyday to get to classes

>>10204608
Nobody is talking about it being prestigious, they’re talking about the size of the campuses you absolute sped. If you didn’t go to university or went to a community college you wouldn’t be familiar with the large area some campuses take up.

>>10204574
>>10204590
why? I use tinder and bumble because they are the only active dating apps. I got more matches in tinder in a few months than I did on okcupid in years.

>>10204465
men always side with men, even when the men are wrong. Why?

>>10204431
That's shy they are fat then? Eating way too much bait.

Diet and nutrition --->/fit/

>>10204611
Well, i just said I went to university, and even people who don't go to university know how big campuses are. this person brought up going to a "community college" as an insult because community college is perceived as less prestigious. Also what is with people getting so offended on here about people disagreeing with them? Like, man, you guys say something crazy like walking 5hrs a day, even if you don't work, is normal (20 miles) and then double down and insult people when they tell you it's wrong. Can't you just be like "yeah, i exaggerated, whatever"? Feels like everyone on here is the exact same.

>>10204627
Dude can you calm down? We get it, you’re out of shape and upset that other people aren’t. But your personal feelings don’t change reality, and it doesn’t mean that everyone who disagrees with your hurt feelings is the same person.

>>10201945
I've had to do this because the cheap taobao piece of shit zipper locked up on me and no amount of home remedies for stuck zippers would free me from the fucking dress so I just hulked out. Took it to a seamstress and it got fixed up like new (and she put in a new, non-garbage zipper for me too)

>>10204630
You all mays as well be the same person. gulls be like "I'm not fat! I walk 5 hours a day! I'm not fat! I'm not! You're the one who's fat for not walking 20 miles a day!"
The projection is obvious. It's always fatties trying to start shit on here. I'm not out of shape, you can keep lying to yourself if it makes you feel better, though.

>>10204630
Dude just look up how many steps is in a mile... About 2000 steps. People who live reasonable desk jobs need to aim for 6-10k steps a day to be healthy. Looking it up, nurses (who have very active jobs) walk an estimated 8k in a 8 hour day. Your 20 miles is just totally off

>I wonder what’s going on in the feels thread
>Some idiot said they walked 20 miles a day and then refused to backtrack when called out
Yup that tracks

>>10204391
anon, 20 miles is the length of the county I live in.

>>10204641
You clearly didn’t read the thread

>>10204648
Sorry, multiple people.

>>10204649
Do you need glasses or classes on reading?

>>10204650

>>10204388 #
A lot of jobs involve walking that much a day, like medicine/culinary/parks jobs and many more. It’s more than reasonable for someone to take enough steps to hit the 20 mile mark. The people denying that must live very sedentary lives

Idk what you’re reading bro, but they never walked that back and 20 miles is 8 hours of continuous walking done by a trained power walker

>>10204639
I’m a uni student who has to walk everywhere. During the school year, I accumulate like 2-4k steps. Currently working at a pharmacy and I do 4-5k easy. I can easily imagine servers or nurses reaching up to 8k. 20 miles a day sounds pretty insane though, unless you’re marathon training or something.

>>10204654
>>10204656
I had a job where I walked a lot and I hit 20k steps not infrequently. However, 40k steps (20 miles) is ridiculous unless your job is hiking and literally nothing else.

>>10204654
It’s really saddening to me that these people live such sedentary lives that they think it’s “insane” or that someone must be lying if they’re active.

>>10204664
Okay bait is fun!

What was your job and how long did you walk with out stopping and at what pace?

It's obvious what's going on here. A person who was roleplaying claimed they walk 20 miles a day. They are likely so unhealthy that they didn't even realise how insane that number was, even for a power walker, and then when they were called out, they doubled down, called everyone fat so they wouldn't get caught as the fat piece of shit they were, and still refuse to back down. They even called people amerifags, despite exposing them self as american as soon as they used miles.
Remember guys, this board is littered with roleplayers who will never admit they are liars, ever. And it's fucking hilarious.

>>10204668
I usually like to see how far they’ll dig their hole. Once they get to vague name calling the fun stops tho because you know they can’t think of how to lie next.

I took all the brand out of my closet and drawers and laid it all out on my bed so I can lie on op of it and giggle with sheer glee.
Best feeling

I really can’t wrap my head around the people who do things one way so they think everyone else does it that way?

>>10204676
what?

>>10204678
The people in this thread saying whoever walks a lot must be lying, even though it’s common in some professions

>>10204680
oh my god let it go

>>10204680
It's ridiculous to assume that most people have enough free time to dedicate 4-6 hours to walking 20 miles a day outside of work. That's why we think they're lying.

If your job description forces you to walk that much, that's different than saying, "I walk 20 miles at my university" or whatever else retarded shit people are claiming on here. 40k steps is not normal for the average person.

>>10204682
Nobody is insisting that everyone has that time, and most people who have said they do in this thread vocalize they have a job that demands they do it. I don’t know why you’re fixated on them lying.

>>10204684
>>10204654
anon, if they work 8 hour days they would be incapable of stopping

/cgl/ - Unrealistic Walking Estimates

>>10204686
That’s factually incorrect, the average person would not take that long to walk that far, but alright. And there are tons of jobs that keep you on your feet to get in that many miles a day. The best example that you wouldn’t think of is culinary jobs, like someone said up thread. It reads like you’re fixated on the miles being someone continuously walking a stretch of land, but most people on the thread seem to be referring to total steps throughout the day.

Just nuke this thread, they're going to continue until bump limit anyway.

>>10204684
This whole thread derailed because someone asked for advice on how to walk more, obviously inspired by the girl who lost 15 lbs in one month because she walked 20 miles for her job.

People were adamant that 20 miles a day was a NORMAL amount for people to walk, and that anyone who disagreed was obviously obese. I'm not fixated on anything, just calling out obviously bad advice for newcomers.

>>10204691
Endurance is a thing, anon. You can’t just multiply a singular 15 minute mile and get an estimate of how many hours of walking 20 miles is.

>>10204697
You don’t think the average extremely active lifestyle person that would be walking that long has poor endurance do you? Lol.

>>10204699
Just because I can swim a sub 1 minute 100m doesn’t be mean I can swim a sub 5 minute 500m. Bizarrely, this sentence is actually the biggest indication you’ve never done a single athletic thing in your life, not the 20 mile stupidity.

Also: https://www.verywellfit.com/how-far-can-a-healthy-person-walk-3975556

>>10204709
>Bizarrely, this sentence is actually the biggest indication you’ve never done a single athletic thing in your life,

If you say so. Because you clearly know everything about me from a few anonymous posts lol. I guess I’m hallucinating my daily hikes.

>>10204682
you're right, but we should let it go. it stopped being funny and now its sad. they're a roleplayer, so dont give them mind

>>10204713
this thread should just be nuked

>>10204711
u hike for 20 miles a day? or do you walk during work for 20 miles a day? get it straight...

>>10204723
Nice deflecting and twisting of words. But this is the last (you) from me, because once people start saying they know personal habits like how much you exercise from an anonymous post you know they’re crazy

>>10204729
>not answering the question
so neither ok

>>10200054
I had a relationship with a guy for years, he pushed for us to live together, had problems communicating and would stone wall me with bullshit "idk" answers. People know why they do most things, its another thing entirely to admit it out loud to yourself and any one else. Then it becomes real. Im getting the same vibe here as i did with my ex. He cheated and blamed mostly everything on me. I Hope yours didnt do the same. I really hope not. However, guilt manifests itself in weird ways.
At the very least, realistically, he has trouble communicating with you and understanding your points of view. That will have to change if you guys go much further. Dont give up on your kawaii dreams so some guy stops feeling so insecure about himself and his relationship with you. Its all very self centered
>"how will I pay for it"
>"i thought you wanted to be with me"
>lies and says he thought you would change for him
>admits to telling you what you wanna hear
Theres not much of "you" or "us" in there unless it seems to be something tearing you down.

My little sister called me "king of the faggots" for getting a Miku tattoo

>>10205054
You might as well have gotten a tattoo that said “I love sucking dick” you giant faggot

I love how the LARP community I'm part of flocks together in times of need and sadness.

I bought materials for my first cosplay I'm really excited!

How do I sew!

>cc/cgl/ merged with /hb/
rip. kinda sad it didn't take off, but we're really too deeply rooted to here.

>be me
>classic lolita
>like the look of lolita with natural hair
>bangs don't look good on me
>long hair doesn't suit me
What do

>dream dress that i can never afford on sale
>right when i'm bombarded with health bills
why did i have to be born fucking cripped and retarded

>>10205301
Quit being a munchie and get your life together

>>10205230
There is no way in hell that neither bangs nor long hair suit you, especially the long hair. Unless you're a man?? But either way I struggle to think of the kind of face type that wouldn't look good with long hair.

>>10205309
Not them but long skinny faces look bad with with long hair cuz it exaggerates the negative qualities of their face shape. It’s possible they don’t know how to style bangs and they look bad as a result.

Also guys look hot with long hair so long as they’re not incels

>>10205311
Long skinny faces look good with bangs tho

>>10205309
I don't have a lot of hair. I'm growing my hair out now and the weight of my hair seems to be dragging it down, giving me really flat hair which looks unbalanced in lolita. With shorter hairstyles though, muly hair looks more voluminous. I've also noticed I look better when my hair is pulled back.

>>10205317
>muly
my

>>10205230
Wear long layers in an overall mid-length style that is short enough to not be weighed down but still long enough to make pretty updos. Style updos with some of the shorter layered side pieces left out so you can curl them to give volume, use some well-matched extensions if you need them. Use lightweight but volumizing styling products that don't weigh down your hair.

>>10205317
That is an issue with styling, see how you are drying your hair and what products you use. Layers may help as well.

This fucking serger is making me go bonkers, fiddling with all the functions to get a single stitch that isn't imbalanced is so time consuming. Spent at least 2 hours now and it's STILL uneven

Also, legitimately don't know if the serger was worth the money.

>>10204291
*smokes blunt* god it’s good to like items that no one else really wants and to have Japan shopping service buy shit for you. All of you are cucked by these shitty no caring shopping services

>>10200058
>>10200068
>>10200074
>>10200613
>>10200617
>>10203858
>>10205042
I'd really like to thank you gulls for taking the time to help me.
I didn't respond right away because I wanted some time to just think things through.
I still have a lot to think about, but your posts gave me the push to reach out to a close friend and finally tell her about my doubts and things that have been happening.
Being in a different country where he's the only person I know, I didn't want anyone to worry about me. I thought I had to put on a good face for friends and family and never talk about my feelings, or else I would just be gossiping.
I'm partly responsible for why things have gotten to this point. I rarely have convictions and so I come out of most arguments doubting myself. I have a few months left before I return home, so I'm just going to try and focus on making good memories and working on improving communication for now. When I'm back home, I'll have more space to think about things clearly.
Again, thank you for all of your responses and advice. I didn't want to just disappear without thanking all of you, I really do appreciate you taking the time to help a stranger.

>>10205317
Sounds like you have the case of triangle hair. Like >>10205371 said it's definitely a styling and product issue. I have long thick hair but I tend to get triangle hair when not using the best shampoo or when my hair gets too oily. Bangs will definitely help balancing out the triangle as well as updos like these. If you're not sure, definitely try clip on bangs. Also large hair accessories like head eating bows and bonnets are your friend.

You can have good natural hair looks!

>>10205503
Dropped pic

>>10205436
what ss do you use? I also love ugly shit, but even the ugliest brand shit get snatched after a few hours if it's cheap enough. I just want my Marble stuff and these bitches are stopping me

>>10203704
this is sage advice desu, thanks anon

>>10205487
glad to see you're okay and taking things seriously anon! Good luck with everything.

>>10205371
>>10205503
Thanks for the advice kind anons! I'll look into it!

>>10204291

When you write in next time just say that you know there's a stain on the dress, you will take full responsibility and not blame Japonica if the item is damaged, and tell them to buy it. That way there's no need to email you back about it.

Some idiot anons in the past have talked about filing paypal disputes because they can't brain that Japonica isn't responsible if the seller sends you a load of crap, so I can see how they'd be very careful around things like damaged secondhand stuff.

>Upset about my my boyfriend dumping me
>My mom comes by and sees me being said and dumpy
>"Put on one of those poofy dresses you like, we're going out"
>We go out to an art gallery
>All the old ladies tell me how wonderful I look and how much they like my outfit
>Mom's acting smug, like "that's my daughter" even though she doesn't quite get the fashion
Thanks Mom, I haven't felt that confident and supported in a while.

>>10205797
Wholesome.

>>10205797
Enriching

New thread since this ones hit limit.
>>10205936

>>10205937
>moved to /r9k/ what the fuck?

>>10207554
I guess mods thought we were being a bit too "/r9k with frills".

>>10207554
There were only like 5 actual cgl posts in that thread. Take the hint.