/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

What are your opinions on cosplay burlesque?

>>10213033
That's a big fish.

>>10207566
Old Thread

>>10212677
See, OrchardCorset is ok, if you need something more wearable under clothes for more discreet wear later on...
But, for a first main corset doing the heavy lifting, it needs to be better made.

>>10213053
Dropped this link.
>>>/cgl/thread/S10207566

Yo who want to derail with political shit like half the threads do?

>>10213062
no, i wanna talk about fatties

MM Farutetto rerelease fucking WHEN?

>>10213084

MM BEING ALIVE FUCKING WHEN

>mfw they never released that misty color
>mfw they only released the burgundy color to chinese

mm let me throw money at you jfc

I'm a straight girl but I also kind of desire a cute lolita girlfriend. I guess I'm kinda bi curious but only for fellow lolitas?

>>10213114
Girls are better anyway.

I forgot semi loose package of cannabis buds to one of my bags. Then I tossed it to my closet where I store all my dresses.
Now all my pieces smell like jamaica

I don’t deserve lolita

>>10213262
Clean yo shit girl

>>10213262
druggies indeed don't deserve lolita. filthy punk or metal clothes would suit you better

>>10213262
grab some activated bamboo charcoal deodorizing packets. They recharge with sunlight and are good for 2 years at least. New carpet glue made my lolita closet stink but they knocked the smell out in 3 days.

>>10213265
Nayrt but using the term druggie to describe someone who smokes fucking weed in the year 2019 lmao

>>10213267
>unironically using "the current year" as a defense

>>10213267
it's classified as a drug and is illegal in most states and countries, so idk what your point is

>>10213266
This is actually reallly neat advice. I need it foe the carpet smell that refuses to leave since I moving into my apt.

>>10213267

moderation is key.

Someone who smokes once in a while I wouldn't consider a 'druggie,' but if you're smoking everyday and feel like you unironically need to, yes, that would qualify as addiction.

Also, high functioning druggies exist and while it's good for them, I generally don't want to hang out with them because from experience they have nothing else to share but 420 culture.

>>10213265
>not knowing the huge influences punk has on lolita fashion and culture
holy shit just kys you clueless LARPer

>>10213332
sounds like you're confusing western punk with visual kei and jrock

>>10213339
>making yourself look even more retarded and clueless
yikes

>>10213339
Uh....did you just forget an entire substyle exists? It's not just "gothic" or "sweet". Where do you think RHS came from?

>>10213343
we're talking about influence on lolita in general, not one specific substyle. lolita was heavily influenced by and stems from visual kei, not western punk, although that is one substyle

>tfw you're 5"11
>wide set ribs
>keep falling in love with dresses that you can't wear

Honestly being a tall woman has been a curse most of my life

>>10213387
>tall
>curse
Anon, listen to what you're saying

>fell in love with lolita and overall cutesy girly fashion
>pastels, beiges, frills, silk, chiffon, sugar and spice and everything nice
>born possibly intersex with malformations, male structured skeleton, short and wide stature, humongous shoulders and biceps, wide hips, overwhelmingly hairy, shitty muddy skin, and overall very ugly and very much not kawaii.
>feel that lingering pain everytime I'm browsing things at a store and see cute dresses.
>can't even get a gf to pamper and dress up.
I accepted myself and my fate. But it still kind of hurts...

>>10213392
>possibly intersex
Just say you're a tranner anon. Having wide hips doesn't make you part female.

>>10213400
I'm serious. doc ordered me to get a karyotype test, but I can't afford that shit. chances of conceiving are out the window as well.

But yes, as of now I fall into the tranner label as well I guess because I started transitioning and taking hrt. I'm the inverse of what you're thinking though. born female, supposedly, transitioning to male. but I have always looked (and acted?) like a hon/sissy.
I decided to transition and fuck yeah im really happy, don't get me wrong, but damn sometimes I still feel the lingering jealousy and sting.
>inb4 ayden

>>10213345
And what inspired visual kei? Think, think, think

>>10213114
Lolitas are the true third gender

>>10213387
Tall is not your curse, your proportions are. I'm 5'9 and my chest is 82cm and my waist is 62. I've never had fit issues.

>Shitty jobs through 20s and can't afford brand
>More money now i'm in my early/mid 30s
>Don't feel cute enough for real brand

>tfw I got all my DD
>tfw the only thing left is a BL dress
>tfw so ashamed to post a WTB for it

>>10213439
The owner and designer for IW is in her mid 30's and still wears lolita all the time. Wear what makes you happy.

>>10213403
May I suggest getting a dollifie and dressing that up instead?

>be me, /fa/ poster
>lurk /cgl/ for over a year
>desperately want to get into cosplay
>friends hate the idea of going to cons
>not confident enough to go alone
>afraid of meeting new people
what should I do, gulls?

>>10213266
Thank you for the tip! I will hang them to balcony for first aid

>>10213265
Lolita is the real punk clothing. You can buy studded leather jackets in every normie store

>>10213498
Join whatever discord covers your area and make some con buddies?

>>10213498
Stop hanging out with catty homosexual men.

>>10213439
So you're saying you're NOT gonna die at the age of 80 in a btssb dress? Disgusting.

>>10213511
should I just wait for the next general thread in my area, or is there somewhere else I should look for a decent server? I haven't noticed any PNW threads in a while.
>>10213518
noted

>>10213498
ideally, work on how your confidence is hindered
but realistically, live vicariously through pics of other people having fun

like me

>tfw no cosplay/lolita gf

Should I just take the plunge and go for a hime cut?

>>10213599
yes, but only if you're sure it would really look good on your face.

>>10213603
How would I know if it will look really good on my face before I try it?

>>10213599
Hair grows back if you don't like it

>>10213606
growing out a fringe is the worst

>>10213599
Save yourself the trouble and get a wig.

>>10213493
Anon, don't feed my unhealthy addictions. I already wasted unholy amounts of money into dolls when I was a kid and virtual avatars online thorough my life.

>>10213607
it's a hime cut, You can pin the sides back.

I'm the girl who asked if she should go to the con after a colonoscopy. I decided not to after I shat myself on the ride home.

>>10213661
LOL, im glad you decided not to go. Hope your colon regulates itself soon

>>10213661
>Not wearing a con diaper.

>>10213599
Yes. Getting a hime cut changed my life. The advice that got me to take the big step was that if you really truly hate it, eating vitamin pills meant for pregnant women boosts hair growth. Cut your hear and get vitamins if you don't like it. Growing out a fringe might suck, but speedrun it and experiment with cute "bangs pinned back" looks.

Or just enjoy your hime cut. Do it.

When I left the con today some guy tried to hit on me and I told him I was a lesbian, afterwards it hit me that that was the first time I ever said it aloud and it felt... Weird but not in a bad way. Also had a cry in the bathroom earlier, 4 day cons are hard when you have anxiety

>>10213114
get you a femboy and dress him up in lolita. get both your desires at once.

I am drunk at fanboy expo and I am sick of all these bare booty thoughts they are never be gone they are always

>How do you make someone leave you alone without them crying bully?
Newbie ita decided we're now BFFs because I tried to help her be less ita before finding out she's a pretty terrible person. I've been ignoring her messages and avoiding her at meets but she doesn't get it.

>>10213605
Just don't have a super square head and jaw and you'll be fine.

>>10213428
Nice try bobby.
>>10213505
That's true actually.
>>10213566
Like all of us, let's be real.

everyone in my comm is so friendly and sweet, i’m not used to getting so many compliments and messages directed at me via pm. it’s the only source of social interaction i get outside of work, so i hope continuing to funnel all of my money into this will be worth it in the long run. i can only work part time right now so it’s such a slow process. i guess i’m just grateful for the positive vibes everyone has, i hope i’m doing it right and don’t seem like a complete autist

>>10213403
wait im confused, why are you transitioning to male if you want to look cutesy/be more feminine?

Watching someone implode like this is pretty painful, could you wrap it up soon?

Gotta vent.
>MM dream dress appears
>have the funds
>hit purchase
>excited to coord this piece for the next meet
>Shatter my femur the very next day

Welp, I'll be in recovery for months and will also be going through surgery. Can't coord my tights around a cast without just cutting them up, and it's not like I'll be walking around anytime either. This is the worst fucking summer ever. Every lolita related event and con I had lined up is out the window.

>>10213998
Because they know it's too late for them, and they want to live the semblance of a normal life.
Would be my guess.

why do i get shittons of compliments from other women calling me cute/adorable/pretty but never men?

>>10213998
not the same anon, but more masculine trans women/more feminine trans men still exist. it's not the most common thing since either way you can become more "clockable" than you would be otherwise, but still... feminine trans men are no less men than hypermasculine ones, just like with cis men.

>>10214015
I'm sorry anon, that really sucks. Missing out and being in pain is no fun, but on the bright side at least you got your dream dress and when you feel better you can wear it. Just try to think of your recovery time as more time to perfect your coord for when the next event comes along. I hope the surgery goes well and you feel better soon.

>>10214030
It's time to embrace plaid, anon

>>10214030
a lot of men are easily intimidated by bolder looks, lolita easily being one of them. I can't speak for every guy, but we're usually afraid of sounding like creeps as well.
t. man who's talked to other men about this sort of thing

>>10213998
I'm male, not trans, and want to look cutesy. I have a ftm friend who just wants to be cute too.
Its not like you have to pick between being hyper masculine or hyper feminine. Lots of androgynous people out there.

>>10214030
I always compliment women wearing lolita or cosplay. Its not too surprising many other men don't because
1. Many more women care about fashion than men, so less men appreciate someone well dressed.
2. You see some of these threads? half the lolitas here hate men, so they could be worried about getting yelled at for being a "creep". I use to have a female friend who would get very angry whenever a guy complimented her. "He only said that because he wants to sleep with me".

>>10214036
thanks so for the advice anon, you're too kind. My days in dance are effectively over, so I should probably try to enjoy the hobbies I actually can participate in after I heal, instead of focusing on the short term.

>>10214076
>>10214032
that's true, I think I just got confused by the "jealousy" part. I thought they were saying they're jealous of cis women bodies. But yeah anyone can want to be smaller/feminine, even guys

My friend split her cosplay tights in a thong and all the pervertos started taking pics

**Stop posting dresses in the ouji/aristo section of lacemarket**
rrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

>>10213525
aw the thought of a little old lady wearing lolita is adorable

>>10214032
you need dysphoria to be trans, and if you're dysphoric then dressing as your birth sex should be an awful experience. otherwise you're just genderfluid or whatever.

>>10213037
>tfw drunk homos think they can touch the girls because they're gay

Anon from last thread with friend who's gf got into lolita through me. Before I even had a chance to show her bsolf, I found out she has a violent crush on me and thinks my
>tfw no rori gf
jokes aren't mostly jokes (like I do but...not her...) so now it feels really awkward and now I'm most certainly unsure of what to do. She's also 18, and I'm mid-20s

>>10213428
Damn it, Bobby!

>>10214211
Don't do anything about it. Either her crush will pass or she breaks up with the bf/gf and you never have to talk to her again

Why isn't there a Male counterpart to lolita?
Why can't I be fabulous enough to cosplay the anime boys I want to no matter how good my body is?

>>10214193
>if you're dysphoric then dressing as your birth sex should be an awful experience
That depends on the perspective. You could argue that wearing a dress =/= dressing like a women. Same with make-up. Yes, you're misgendered more easily, but it's a bit black/white to say that you have to forgo your previous interests and become hypermasculinized/hyperfeminized in order to be truly trans.

>>10214243
>male counterpart to lolita
isn't that just ouji?
>>10214247
this, style =/= gender. it's really not that complicated.

>>10214243
the male counterpart is ouji

>>10214249
>>10214250
Is that big in the west at all like lolita?

>>10214251
lolita isn't really big in the west either (compared to say, china) but no, ouji isn't popular anywhere unfortunately

>>10214252
Fugg :DDDDD

>>10214252
>>10214254
Well, that's mostly because guys aren't into fashion in general. Lolita is already niche so its masculine counterpart is even more niche.

>>10214255
Yeah, that's understandable. Sometimes I like dressing up though, especially when everything comes together

>>10214257
oujis are generally welcome at lolita meetups and events and since they are rare, we're usually delighted to see them around. so no reason you can't try it out

>>10214259
Maybe, feels like I'd be out of place though. I hate being that odd one out of a group.

>>10214260
i think it's pretty impossible to be the odd one out in a group of alt fashion people who are all wearing various substyles. but also there are general j-fashion groups where you would be a lot more likely to have other men there.

>>10214254
Aristo/EGA is more widely accepted for men without looking like an adult man baby in roleplaying clothes. And if you have the body, and even tiny bit of fashion sense to coord an outfit, you'll have lolitas thirsting all over your dick my man

>>10214268
Thanks for the advice, maybe I'll try it out once I get a bit more spending money, I already have games, figures, and vinyl as hobbies, so those are expensive enough
>>10214283
Got any pictures of those? I can't find any specific examples online

>>10214288
Do your own research fuckface

>>10214288
i highly suggest taobao for ouji/ega outfits at low prices

>>10214283
this is true, well dressed men are instant ladyboner material

>>10214288
https://www.google.com/search?q=elegant+gothic+aristocrat

>>10213345
you can't just make shit up like this and hope no one notices. have you just been living under a rock and not know who vivienne westwood is?

How to meet guys with a hobby that attracts only girls and gay men? Do you have a bf? How did you meet him?

>>10214368
Have a life outside your hobby. Or use dating apps.

>>10214368
If you're open to foreign guys, I highly recommend Chinese men. They see Lolita as kinda normal/not weird because of how common it is back in China and usually think it's very charming. Often they're open to letting their gf dress them up, so you can likely get them to try EGA without too much work as well. Asian dating apps like Tantan are where you would find these guys.

>>10214368
If your a cosplayer into weeb stuff and even decent looking, I'd think it'd be easy to find a bf. A nerdy cute girl is most guys dream girl.
If you're a Lolita or just into J-fashion,
it'd be a bit harder.

>>10214368
Been with my guy 10 years. Met him in the Industrial IRC on vampirefreaks.

Do you really have no other hobbies or interests aside from lolita?

>>10214373
>Chinese
Hard pass.
Chinese American sure, but mainlanders can sit on it.

>>10214376
Chinese Americans are basically exactly like white guys and will think Lolita is weird like they do. I've always had great experiences with mainland guys, did someone hurt you?

>>10214368
I have a bf, met him through a dating app (not Tinder).
I gradually and carefully introduced him to the weird shit I wear. He’s pretty chill with it

Finding a bf is easy.
Finding a bf that is well adjusted, financially stable and has his life in order, now THAT is hard...

>>10214384
you forgot good looking. so many hot guys are losers, but damn they're so hot.

>>10214384
I have a friend who is all of this, but because he's dorky before he's cute, boi still hunting.

Lower your standards juust a little.

>>10214368
There's guys our there, like this guy
>>10214243
Some find that stuff interesting

>>10214373
But how to get a chinese bf? (when you can't speak chinese...) I find them very attractive and they're usually also a lot taller than other asians.

>>10214384
But financially stable do you mean you want them to pay for everything for you?

>>10214404
Oh, now I know you're baiting.

>>10214373
>suggesting anyone date Chinese anyone, male or female
Full stop

>>10214405
>>/r9k/
Don't get your tighty whities in a twist.

>>10214408
No I'm genuinely serious. I've met girls who want that from a guy. I know some guys don't have their money together at all and just going out with them to hang can be annoying, so I can understand why that would be an even bigger hassle, so I understand the milder sentiment

>>10214406
What's bait about saying I want a chinese bf?

>>10214384
>>10214385
>>10214405

Lower your standards ladies, each sex has their benefits but if you find your perfect person i hope you know they probably won't be into you

>>10214411
Hahahahahhahaha

>>10214411
If you are a tall blonde white woman that's ez

>>10214414
Finding someone put together and phsyically attractive isn't actually asking for that much.
Most people here that aren't trolling and baiting really just don't want to be some slub's mom.

>>10214419
Girls are usually picker than guys. So I find it less offensive to see gulls here want more than the usual idiot off /soc/

>>10214404
Like I said, Tantan is a good place to start as it will show the ones in your area. They will all speak at least a little English since they learn it as part of their public school curriculum. I forgot to mention they pretty much only like white or asian girls, it would be a bit hard for a dark skinned girl to get one. Unfortunate cultural biases for fair skin.

>>10214418
Lol what. Tall is absolutely not a good trait when going after asian guys considering they're rarely tall themselves. They like short girls. And actually tend to prefer dark haired ones as those reflect their country's beauty standards better.

>Go to first con in 5 years
>Went alone
>Figure I'll be fine alone because I'm a loner
>Get there
>See everyone hanging out with their friends/SO's
>Realize that despite trying to act cool and distant all the time, I don't want to be alone
>It's just a defense mechanism
>Spent the whole con feeling miserable inside because I had no one to enjoy it with

How do I make friends at cons, /cgl/?

>>10214422
Im assuming you have an asian bf

>>10214427
>acquire bf
>???
>profit

>>10214433
b-but I'm a straight guy...!

>>10214435
Or so you thought

>>10214431
I've only ever had asian bfs. Never understood why whiteworshipping is even a thing.

>>10214438
Ah I was sitting here assuming your white the entire time

Whatever you do, DON'T date guys working in IT.
They are always so incredibly boring.

>>10214422
So I'm fucked when I'm tall, white and not black-haired?

>>10214442
>Whatever you do, DON'T date guys working in IT.
How so?

>>10214447
I'm sure there are some who would be interested in a girl like that, just not as many as a petite brunette would garner.

Having a bf is way overrated imo.
Why do you even want one? So you can show him off to your friends/family?
No thanks, life is better without one

>be lesbian weeb
>meet group of weebs at pride
>there's a really pretty jojo weeb who seems like fun
>try to talk and flirt but she doesn't seem interested
>get chatting to her friend later and he tells me 'well yeah i guess she's bi but she only really dates dudes'
Every fucking time man

>>10214442
What about girls on IT?
>>10214456
I kind of want one just for when i'm bored but they often get too clingy and it turns me off. I need my space man.

>ripped but bald
Would you?

>>10214460
No, both ripped and bald is a turn off for me

>>10214454
What? At first you say black hair, because that's simply China's standard colour, but now you say brunette? Make up your mind lol
Why would they date white girls who look like the dollar store version of their women?
Asian men like russian girls.

>>10214466
I never said black, I said dark hair. As in brown and black. The beauty standard in China is short, slim, with dark hair and that's what most men there attracted to. The only asian men who lust after blondes are the American born ones, because American beauty standards focus a lot on blonde women. It all has to do with cultural influences.

Because Asians are addicted to dying their hair, even if it's just brown

Anyway if you're 25 and older, they won't like you no matter what.

>>10214459
clingy and needy is a turn on for me. i need me one of those.

>>10214478
They may indeed label 25+ asian girls as sheng nu because of cultural expectations, but they tend to make exceptions for older white girls as they acknowledge westerners marry later in life. This is especially true for the men who are still single over 25 as well, they feel a lot of pressure.

>>10213440
What dress anon? Some BL dresses can be cute!

>>10214458
fucking fujos.
they've been flocking to jojo lately too.

>>10213767
Stop thinking them then

>>10214283
That's why I wouldn't want my boyfriend to wear ouji/jfash. He's attractive and the girls in my comm thirst over anyone with a cock in pumpkin pants.

>>10214530
What are some general ways to keep your bf safe from thots?

>>10214268
>i think it's pretty impossible to be the odd one out in a group of alt fashion people who are all wearing various substyles.

I was almost kicked out of my local comm simply for being male, and I see comments like pic related a lot.

>>10214384
>Finding a bf that is well adjusted, financially stable and has his life in order, now THAT is hard...

I got that all and looking for the same. Anime and j-fashion doesn't exactly attract the most well adjusted people so its a massive pain finding someone with their life together and likes anime.

>>10214373
>>10214378

I dated a Malaysian Chinese dude who I thought would understand my jfashion and cosplay. He did, but he was a real dick about doing academically better than me in our major, thought I was clingy for criticizing his friend group for trying to hook him up with another girl while we were still dating, and would put me down for anytime I cried. Not to mention that the language barrier was sometimes difficult - even though he knew English there were times where it was pretty clear we weren't understanding each other even on a purely language level.

I'm with an ABC now and he more than supports my hobby, plus we have no language barriers. They exist out there, you just have to be patient.

>>10214576
Malayasian culture is quite different from Chinese culture so this is an irrelevant anecdote. He may be Chinese by blood but he's Malayasian by culture.

There are certainly some okay ABCs out there, but finding ones that aren't whitewashed is a difficult task. FOBs are just so much better imo.

>tfw no gf that loves you for who you are

>>10214373
Is lolita really common in China?

>>10214673
It's probably some Chinese guy trying to get with white girls, just ignore them

>>10214414
Women need high standards. It's better to be alone than to be with a man who cannot provide stability. Sorry men.

>>10214540

>>10214645

Not going to lie, I'm also abc but I prefer a little white washing because at least they respect you as a woman.

Malaysian dude may have been Malaysian but he also came with a heavy dose of male chauvinism and overly traditional sensibilities about women, something I've seen with fobs in general.

>>10214673
More common than it ever was in the west, to the point that if you ask random young adults what Lolita is, they will know and it's not considered a really weird thing. China has far more Lolita brands than Japan for this reason, as there is a huge demand to be met for Lolita goods that Japan's limited releases can't keep up with. They have their own national Lolita magazine as well, not just a translation of Japanese ones as the west had. It's become a pretty big thing.

>>10214685
Not sure where you are getting that from.

>>10214673

In the grand scheme of things not really. I don't know what anon is going on about with lolita and Chinese, the vast majority will think you're weird and not great for childbearing because of it. The weebs well - I mean there are plenty of them in the states. I can't see why you would want to outsource one.

In the very small bubble of the lolita world, the few Chinese who are into it still have way more numbers and financial clout than we could dream or, so that's why brands will cater to their taste. China is 1 billion people, so even if only 0.001% of them are into it, that's way more than what the rest of the world can muster.

>>10214712
>the few Chinese who are into it
>few
Chinese Lolitas make up the biggest Lolita population that has ever existed. It's huge. Both Japanese and Chinese brands sell out like crazy because of Chinese buyers, the tea parties are ginormous and opulent, and again they have their own extremely popular national magazine.

>the vast majority will think you're weird and not great for childbearing because of it
Where are you getting this from? That describes Japanese men's attitudes towards Lolita for sure, but Chinese men have a totally different outlook on it due to the popularity among various types of women and cultural endearment towards traditional femininity.

>>10214722

Read the second paragraph. I did state that despite making a relatively low percentage of the population, its still a fuckton of people to contend with, not to mention many of them are from affluent means so they can buy firsthand what others will only wait secondhand for. In a very small niche fashion, yes they will dwarf the economy by sheer numbers even if they only represent a small proportion of the population.

>Chinese men have a totally different outlook on it due to the popularity among various types of women and cultural endearment towards traditional femininity.

Citation needed lol.

>>10214728
>Citation needed lol.
Experience in China and Chinese Lolita Comms (online and off) vs the US. Where are you getting *your* assumptions from?

>>10214736

Don't know if they're pulling your leg, but I have a fuckton of mainland family. I should tell them all this so they get off my back.

hime cuts look awful on white girls

>>10214767
hime cuts look awful in general. makes people look like some weird tacky period drama actor. doubles the tackiness for white girls

>>10213387
i know that feel. won't even wear a wedding dress to my own wedding because of it.

>>10214782
are you going to wear a suit?

>>10214791
just jeans and a blouse, i don't think i'd feel comfortable in a suit.

>>10213265
You sound like a fucking boomer

>>10214793
Aw, wear something cute anon, it's your day.

>>10214736
You're delusional.

>>10214832
You sound white.

>>10214820
because all young people do drugs or what? maybe in the classless shithole that is america

>>10213339
Most of early lolita fashion was heavily inspired by Vivienne Westwood

>>10214708
Seconding this. FOB boys usually have very traditional ideas about gender roles, I've had both Malaysian Chinese and Mainland Chinese bfs and while both thought Iolita was cute they also expected me to marry into their family, quit work and become their mom's domestic slave so I noped out.

>>10214855
They are very traditional, that is true. I would say that's a big part of why they are fine with ultra-feminine styles like lolita. But if you are a career woman type, they're indeed not a good match for you.

Most non-Asian lolitas look bad because of their bangs. Rare is a white girl who looks good with the typical bangs you find in J-fash. I can browse CoF most days and not find one girl with a unique hairstyle that suits her face, only bangs.

I feel like calling people autistic or referring to yourself as add or ocd is kind of like blackface

>>10214855
Why have you had so many Asian boyfriend, wtf

>>10214838
Lol no.

>>10213339
There is literally a substyle called punk lolita

>>10213033
She is going to pleasure herself with that fish.

>>10214906
Sure Jan

>>10214903
This may come as a shock to you, but asian women mostly date asian men. Just like every other race of women mostly dates their own.

>>10214793
I want to wear a white Miku costume to my weeding.

>tfw too baka to marry

>>10214938
sounds like every weeb guy's wet dream

>>10213599
Do it, but make sure they are cut properly. I got one a year ago and she messed it up a bit so i had to repart it and cut them again. It took a awhile to get it right, but it looks so cute now!

>>10214030
Thats a good thing

>>10215070
>>10213599

Bring lots of example pictures for the hairdresser. I find that if I don't do that, they end up getting cut too thin.

>>10214410
Financially stable as in he doesnt have heavy amount of debt and a stable job so that if i want to start a life with him im not fucked over

>>10214916
You've been talking to multiple people this entire time
No one is going to suck your Chinese dick.

>>10215180
The fact that you find it this hard to believe an asian woman would talk up her own men is telling and pretty sad. Despite media portrayals, we're not all lusting for white dudes, sorry.

>>10214864

My housewife mom got abused by her extremely traditional, mainlander mother in law, so how about we extend that to 'if you're a woman.'

>>10215211
That's right, your one personal experience defines the entire race.

>>10215215

Right back at you, anon. Now don't you have Chinese dick to suck?

It seems like most busty lolitas hate their chests but I love my DDs even though they make lolita more difficult. They look sexy and amazing in normal clothes and I would never trade them just to fit into lolita better.

>>10214938
You should marry the guy from last thread with a Miku tattoo.

>>10214903
Yup >>10214918 is right. I ended up dating these guys through mutual friends in college, who were also Asian. I don't have a racial preference though, I just happen to be in social circles with other Asians and they are easier to connect with since we have similar cultures and experiences.

To get this a little more on topic, if we're really looking for subgroups of men who enjoy their SOs wearing Lolita fashion then weebs are the obvious choice.

>>10215256
Because DDs aren’t a problem if you’re thin/average, it’s the gargantuan F and G cup tits that planets have. Lolita fits me pretty well and I’m a DD. I only ever had problems in the past when I was a literal whale. I honestly wish mine were fuller since I was cursed with shallow tits. Maybe once my boyfriend gets those sweet sweet techie bux I’ll ask him to pay for my boob job.

>>10215323
>>10215256
Girls complaining about big tits is like guys complaining about having a nice dick

>>10215335
I expect nothing less from the “logical sex”

>>10215256
I only hate mine because they just happened suddenly and now are too big for my button up blouses that I've been collecting for years.

>>10214828
> it's your day.
not really. i have anxiety issues (amongst others). if it was my day we'd just sign the papers real fast and go home again to be alone and watch netflix. the day really is mostly for my family and fiance.

>>10215323
what a bitch. why don't you pay for it yourself?

>>10215365
You act like a big dong isn't an inconvenience

>>10215438
nah

>>10215442
How would you know ?

>>10215323
F and G aren't gargantuan if you know anything about bra sizing. The person pictured is a 28F. Go to whatbrasizeslooklike on wordpress to find a bra that fits anon.

>>10214912
I want to watch her pleasure herself with that fish.

>>10215591
Lol there's no way those cups are correctly sized
Boobs aren't at their widest right below where they begin

>>10215625
They are if they're slightly conical and have a very wide root width like the example. There's a variety of breast shapes, anon. Attached a side view.

>>10215625
There are more than one types of boobs. Also bras alter the shape of boobs.

>Dating any Chinese more mainland than Hong Kong
Hard pass. Bugmen aren't worth it. Culture's shit. They're basically a self perpetuated cycle of abuse. Low empathy narcissists or burnt out husks.

>>10215690
this is any asian country desu. korean men are much worse in my experience, it's like they're default sociopaths.

The cliques are very obvious within the Texas con community. It gets old going to cons and see the super popular cosplay clique refuse to talk to anyone “beneath” them. Maybe I’m just salty. I really did want to make friends within the community but it feels like I’m in high school all over again. Mind you, I don’t specifically only want to befriend them. But I feel like it’s that clique, then everyone else is in groups with ppl they already know.

>>10215844
Chinese men are uncaring and rude
Korean men are sociopaths
Japanese men are beta cucks

>see guy wearing my dream dress awfully at anime midwest
i want death

>>10215958
The mexicans of the sea are still a viable choice.

>>10213037
My little sister is doing one and I don't know if I should go. I want to support my kid sis, but I do not want to see her butt and ass.

>>10216022
are your parents going

>>10215958
>tfw no beta cuck japanese boyfriend

>>10216026
>that anon from a few years back who did risque cosplay and had her mom scream "I diapered that derriere"

>>10216022
1. What's she dressed as
2. Does she have assets
3. If 2 was either yes or a strong no, film it bruh

>>10216022
Butt AND ass?? I could understand one, but not both!

lmao we really hating on asian dudes out here, fuck asian people. all they do is hang out with their asian cliques and have the worst accents out of everyone. Chinese people are loud as fuck too. and idk about chinese guys being tall I thought koreans were the tallest out of Eastern asians.
t. korean male that isnt a sociopath

>>10216218
i doubt you're actually korean from korea. we're not talking about whitewashed asian-americans

>>10216022
Well, we'd encourage it, but 4chan does loves it's incestious vibes.

>>10214030
>get fit
>only ones who care are other men

My SS suddenly became very slow, sometimes taking 2 days to reply when I wanted to buy something from fril or mercari fast. I've been using her service for over 10 years, I feel loyal to her but... I missed out on so many things I wanted because I kept giving her chances. I don't even know any other SS that buy something within half a day like she used to.

I never know how to answer locals when they ask why I'm a lonelita. I brush it off most of them time but I wonder if they can see right through me and my bitter heart? I'm just not interested in playing nice with a bunch of people I have little in common with.

>Japanese friends came to stay with me for AX and other murrika stuff, have been with them all day every day for the last two weeks
>One of them is a girl, very much not a typical Japanese girl, can't get a date over there because she's not what Japanese guys are into (particularly because she's taller than the average Japanese guy)
>Male friend made it sound beforehand like she was looking for a hookup with a Western guy, but that's totally not the case
>She's impossibly right for me, everything I ever could have fantasized about in a girlfriend, I'm crazy about her
>She either doesn't reciprocate or is just extremely hard to figure out, doesn't help that I kind of freaked her out by making a move too quickly (based on signs that ANY American guy would have interpreted as an invitation).
>Said something to the effect that she likes me but she's not capable of moving that fast
>They leave in a few more days
>My heart's already breaking because I know I'll never meet somebody so up my alley again

>>10216815
This reminds me of one of my male friends that I unfortunately had to stop hanging out with because every time I was nice to him he tried to sleep with me

>>10216815
Yikes. Abandon ship, anon. This is not the waifu you were looking for. Try girls that don't live across an ocean.

>>10216815
I feel bad for her, it sounds like you can’t take a hint.

>>10216825
Ugh I've been that guy in the past, hell that guy may even have been me because I know she was involved with /cgl/. It was years ago and I still feel really bad about what happened.

I think it's an easy trap to fall into for those of us who are generally uncomfortable with expressing attraction or initiating with women and are generally slower-moving with things. I generally don't find myself seriously attracted to anybody until I've gotten to know them quite well and have become comfortable around them, and that's generally right about the time they've let go of any interest they ever may have had in me. It's a bad vicious cycle too, every time it happens and goes badly it just adds to the complexes that cause it in the first place and makes the next time even worse, and it all compounds with extended sexual and emotional deprivation that makes pretty much everything in life confusing and depressing.

>>10216812
"Because I felt like it"
If you smile enough they'll leave you alone once they get out the 'oh that's nice' that they're just dying to say.

>>10216853
Anon, let go of the self pity. It's like an Alcatraz around your neck and girls can smell the bitterness and desperation. Go to therapy to learn how to stop letting other people control your self perception.

>>10216849
I think I ought to clarify some things. First off, we were brought together with the explicit understanding that it was for a potential relationship or fling or hookup or whatever you want to call it. Our friend thought we were a good match and put us together because of it. Secondly, I haven't been the way you might expect with her, I've kept things under control to the point that I'm afraid she might just think I'm a generally nice guy who isn't actually interested in her in the way I am, particularly because she also has pretty low confidence in romantic/sexual dealings (not just my read, but also what our mutual friend says, he keeps telling me that "you two are too similar" and such) and I know exactly how that can lead to writing off obvious signs of attraction as something else because you can't let yourself believe that somebody else actually likes you.

Our mutual friend has actually been pushing me to be MORE aggressive toward her, and she sometimes gives signs that she's looking for it, but I just can't get signals out of her that I can read as a green light. They're not rejections or red lights either, and sometimes she seems really receptive, but other times seems the opposite. The real killer thing with the whole situation is that I think if my Japanese were better or if her English were, this would be a done deal, but we just don't have the eloquence in one another's languages to properly talk about things and come to a mutual understanding about how we feel about one another.

>>10216892
Oh, and also, this is probably important - she's been sleeping in my bed the whole time. With me. That was the arrangement. You can probably understand how that complicates things, especially for two people who have already expressed attraction to one another from day one and who are both in years-long dry spells following traumatic abusive relationships.

>>10216853
I think it's fine if you take your time to fall for someone, lots of women are like that too. Of course it sucks that means you're more likely to try to pursue someone who is already your friend and most likely just wants to stay friends. But falling in love at first sight comes with its own set of challenges.
I still care about my "ex-friend" but the problem was that every time I rejected his advances, he convinced me we could stay friends, but then he tried to sleep with me again some months later. I don't have many friends so I wanted to believe him, but eventually I started to feel like I couldn't be myself around him because he might misunderstand my jokes or whatever for flirting.

>>10214030
it's because men think lolita is pretty tacky, even the weeaboo neckbeard losers.

Speaking of dating woes, i've both recently gotten back into conventions and /cgl/ crap, and slipped past 30. All the girls i used to hang with have either moved on or have started families and most women around-ish my age are hard to find who are... weird enough to be fun, but not to a level where you are ashamed to bring them home.
And i guess i don't want to be a creep who dates someone a decade younger than themselves.

>working on losing weight
>went ahead and bought my DD since i've been making good progress, maybe i can wear it by the end of the year
>arrived today, already excited for my future
>try it on to see how far i have to go
>no shirring, better zip up carefully so i can stop as soon as i've reached the limit
>wait a minute...
>...
>holy fuck it fucking FITS
never give up, anons. never give up

>>10217112
just because you can get it on, doesn't mean it fits.

>>10217112
Good work anon :) You did that!

>>10217114
Don't be salty, diet and exercise will work for you too.

>>10217032
I'm 29 and I feel like everyone I know is breaking up and moving back to their parents

>>10217131
Not salty, just saying. You see so many girls wearing dresses they crammed into, thinking it fits just because they zipped it up.

>>10217207
Fuck off, contain it to the ita thread you already shit over.

>Twin with friend
>First time for me
>Have good time at meet
>Take cute twinning pictures
>Process felt a bit rushed
>She's head over heels happy with the picture
>I low key hate it
>We're standing in a slope, so I look much shorter than usual compared to her
>I didn't properly lay my hair straight
>Think it looks messy and unkempt
>My smile is genuine, which closes my eyes a little
>Her smile is practiced, opening her eyes and angling her face
>I look tired while she looks awake
>Our poses are not properly mirrored
>Blame myself for that, not her at all
>Finally
>Cherry on top
>My actual glasses are crooked
>Symmetry ruined, as if the hair and pose wasn't enough
>Cringe every time my friend mentions the photo
>Don't tell her how I feel

Twinning was fun while it happened, but in the aftermath my toxic insecurities make me feel like the lesser twin. I wish I could be happy like her with this picture. She probably sees the whole composition with the twinning print, but I only see my own flaws. Yeah I'm sad. Feels.

>>10216815
>based on signs that ANY American guy would have interpreted as an invitation
so basically, she was nice and friendly to you and you took that to mean flirting instead of what it actually was? just like most american men?

>>10213428
That boy ain't right I tell you what

>>10217032
Not to insinuate that you're like this, but every guy I've ever known who said "Lol men don't peak, we can always fuck younger girls. I'm going to keep sleeping around until I'm 30." made it to thirty and hit the same dilemma.
Nobody actually wants to have a serious relationship with a sub-20-year-old woman, and by that point the good 25+ women are already in stable relationships, leaving a very small pool.

>>10217329
This. I have some friends who are in similar situations. One because his wife was a weeb piece of shit and left him to weeb, and another because he did the same and fucked around till he was older. They're struggling with finding a decent relationship at all. They're not bad people at this point, but they can't find anyone and relationships are short-lived. Anyone that's into the same nerd shit and accepting and welcoming of it are taken or are batshit crazy.

>>10217207
lmao these bitches really trying to flex on here like they're vegan or some shit
Come back when you got abs

>>10217400
They're not flexing, if the person in the picture flexed it would bust a seam, that's their point.

>>10217252
Just remener how you felt this time and next time either be the one to take the pictures, or speak up.

>>10217007
My man likes it, sorry you're alone anon.

>>10217425
Hoes mad

>>10217252

You need to be open about this. When I twinned with my friend, we both respectfully declined photos where we thought we weren't at our best so we both chose different ones.

Also, yeah, I always regret rushed photos. They never come out well. I know I do best by myself, but the next best thing is to allow for a lot of time when doing scheduled photos with friends.

>>10216892
You should keep in touch
Long distance sucks, but it can work if you both make some time for each other. Plan a trip out to see her, and I mean, really plan. Get your grasp of Japanese on the meantime while you save up enough and look into places you want to go (for yourself) and where you could 'spontaniously' ask her out to.
Bit of a longshot, but if she accepts under a guise of helping you make plans or something lame like that (as opposed to just coming out and saying you want to pursue a 'long distance thing') you'll have better luck.
Remember thst she may not be as atypical as she appears to be, and the Japs are subtle when it comes to love.
>mfw 'I'd have your miso everyday' is a legit marriage proposal for some couples
>mfw I have a shitty selection of reactions to choose from

>>10215256
I have DDDs / I? (in European size at least) and the worst thing is trying to go blouseless or wearing babydoll / highwaisted stuff. idk if i should give up on babydoll styled dresses (as a lot of them are meant to be without a blouse) or find a strapless bra that works, so I'm not sagging to hell.

desu i usually show cleavage in my lolita. even asian lolitas show some on occasion. it's entirely possible to be both modest, elegant, and sexy.

>>10217457
>"both"
>lists three adjectives

>>10217329
I just spent my late 20s battling depression and going through some periods of unemployment, so right when i "should" have been dating, i pretty much missed the boat because i just didn't feel worthy or ready. It's kind of why i'm only just getting back into this stuff now, and making friends again. It doesn't help i was in such a hole i shut out practically my entire friendship group - which was a massive dick move on my part, but i guess depression does wild things to your mind.

Anyway, sorry, just being a whinging garbage pile

>>10217481
She's got big tits, not a big brain

>>10215256
i have 3Ds / I? in euro sizes and the worst part about wearing lolita is trying to fit into baby doll styled dresses and high waisted stuff. a lot of babydoll styled dresses are meant to be blouseless and idk what kinda bra i should or can wear cause if i got without one, i sag to unholy hell and my normal bras show the straps and that just looks unattractive.

>>10217432
You just don't have a sense of humor chubs.

>>10217481
>>10217492
was gunna only do two but my brain decided to add a third.

>>10217329
Very true, I've met quite a few men who ended up like this. Fuckboy logic is awful.

>>10217495
Bruh I wish I could be fat

Wow! Omg I love Chinese men now????
>https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/jul/06/chinese-citys-ban-on-beijing-bikinis-leaves-men-hot-under-collar?fbclid=IwAR09inUJCC7-hN_uDhTiGUkePErMGhv8DO0PFtzgYY1JIaToTW1PA62F6-M

>>10216896
Japanese romantic interests are hard to read. They expect you to just know the answer. Usually Japanese guys try to sleep next to women then make a move while they're sleeping. It's a bad idea since it's hard to see if your partner is ok with it, but Japanese guys aren't that great.

Your friend could have been lying to you. I think it's weird you forced a foreign women who spoke little English to sleep in your bed instead of ensuring your guest felt comfortable and safe. And even if she thought you were cute, that doesn't mean you deserve sex. People can change their minds at any time and maybe as she got to know you she realized she wasn't interested in you.

>>10217457
Babydoll cuts look very unflattering on busty people, it's not about wearing a blouse or not

>>10217494
>>10217457
Babydoll cuts look very unflattering on busty people, it's not about wearing a blouse or not

>>10217745
fair. Sucks 'cause they're cute though.

I think I've accepted that I'm doomed to pretty much be a fatty-chan forever.
I don't even care any more. I just go to cons to drink and hangout anyway, so I'm going to get back to cosplaying because creating stuff soothes my anxiety and helps me not be miserable.

>>10217751
You aren’t “doomed”, you make yourself that way. If you just give up then yeah you’re going to be fat and gross forever.

>>10217754
I have a slew of medical issues. It's not that I'm not trying, it's just slow and I likely will never have the body of a model.
I'm okay with that, and I don't really want to wait until I'm "hot" to start cosplaying any more because I'm not posting pictures online or building a social media presence or anything.

>>10217754
Unfortunately not everyone is able to exercise and eat well to lose weight. Some people have disabilities and conditions that severely impact what they're able to do and they may prioritize their job, their house's cleanliness, their family and loved ones or their hobbies over getting fit. I think it's very unfair to categorize every fat person as being lazy or having given up when there's a slew of reasons why losing weight isn't a priority to them that you might not know about. Sure, maybe in an ideal world everyone would have time and energy to get in shape, but in the real world being overweight shouldn't be a source of shame. If you want to devote free time to doing something you enjoy rather than to exercise, that's your own decision to make, so go ahead and have fun if you think it's more important! At the end of the day it's a hobby, it's meant to be fun.

This board is so dead right now that I'm actually reading the feels thread.

>>10217673
>I think it's weird you forced a foreign women who spoke little English to sleep in your bed instead of ensuring your guest felt comfortable and safe
This is absolutely not the case. I'm not sure if it was her idea or our friend's, but she was on board with it well before I was, it actually took a lot of pushing to get me to agree because I thought it was weird too. Also, nowhere did I say I deserved anything, just that it's emotionally difficult to be constantly close to somebody you like and not be able to do anything.

Anyway though, things improved pretty noticeably yesterday. I won't do the full blow by blow but we had a fun time and it ended with us having a better picture of each other's intentions, and I think she's pretty happy with what she learned of mine because she's suddenly a lot warmer toward me and was even a little bit cuddly in bed last night.

>>10217445
Yeah, this is definitely what I intend to do. It's less of a longshot than it seems too, she seems to have quite serious intentions of moving to the US and not too far in the future. You're right about the atypical thing too, she may look like a rockabilly greaser, act like Osaka from Azumanga Daioh half the time and a yankii punk girl the other half, and rock sexy cosplays like nobody I've ever seen, but inside she's a total yamato nadeshiko, if anything atypical in how traditional and slow she is about these things.

Also, given that she's a cosplayer, I think "I'd hold your bags at every convention" would be my version of that proposal haha.

Hurray for my random burst of energy! I booked an early morning visit to the hairdresser, and now I feel motivated to get good stuff done and go to bed in time tonight. Finally I'll get rid of these stupid split ends!

But I'm not exactly thrilled to defend my home cut to yet another new trainee hairdresser. This is the way I like my face, please don't school me about "blending" like the last one...

>>10217806
it's creepy how you keep comparing her to anime characters

>>10217817
If you could spend time around her you'd understand why, our Japanese friends do it too. My friend kept calling her "crazy" because of the way she acts but if so it's the most benign "crazy" I've ever seen, if she's anything I think she might be a little bit aspie. One way or another she has a lot of mannerisms that are very unusual, even for a Japanese girl, and are very much like an anime character, hence the comparisons.

>>10217833
why do you want to be with an aspie

>>10217765
Yes they are, they just choose not to because it hurts their feelings. If they REALLY wanted to lose weight they could.

>>10217876
It's minor if it's really there at all. She's funny, cute, smart, never boring, very attractive, and shares a lot of my interests and tastes and doesn't judge me for the ones she doesn't share. She also likes me for who I really am and that's a big fucking deal, it's the first time in my life "be yourself" has actually rung true for me.

>>10217765
Still not buying this Being overweight is a form of abusing your body. Losing weight is 80% about a moderate and good diet so yeah, it's not a difficult thing for MOST people to make decent food choices and also eat less. You don't have to even give it a big priority, just stop eating junk and stop overeating calorie dense, nutritionally poor food. That is the simple fix for it. No weird diets, no drastic exercise (though exercising enough to be healthy is also a thing).
You CAN choose to do whatever you want but people will always judge your fatness harshly in nearly every situation. It is a big disadvantage in almost every area of life and staying fat is a CHOICE to voluntarily limit yourself in ways you would not be limited if you were of normal weight. So no, it's not unfair to judge a fat person as someone fundamentally lacking the desire to do basic self-care. That will never change. And I'm sick of people expecting me to discount my own aesthetics when I'm showing a preference for fitness in myself and potential partners. Done with that.

>>10217876
People with disabilities still deserve love. We may struggle in some regards but we're still people with wants and needs.

>>10217907
If it was a simple and easy thing no one would be fat/obese. Obviously the real solution hasn't been taken seriously enough: improving mental health. You will never want to improve your physical body if you hate yourself and stay in a negative head space. Most people who are overweight may just be ignorant about food and health, but if you're obese you obviously have some kind of trauma, mental illness, or use food to cope in some way. Nobody gets that fat without some kind of issue.
Obviously you're under no obligation to date them, but try having some compassion. There are people worse off than you.

>>10217884
>>10217909
good luck with your emotionless gf who'll never learn how to show affection

>>10217913

A lot of it has to do with food deserts and lack of food education, moreso than mental health imo. Granted mental health can factor into it, but quite frequently a large portion of it is literally from people thinking eating a super sized meal is ok and dandy. It's frighteningly easy for someone to slip from an overweight category to the obese one these days and a testament not just to the individual's unhealthy relationship with food, but at least in burgerland our culturally unhealthy relationship with food.

>>10217923
The mental health aspect comes to play because most people who are overweight have a self-defeatist attitude towards their weight beyond just wanting to stuff their face. They genuinely believe that they unable to lost weight and being slim is an unattainable goal. This is not an argument you can win. Usually overweight people would need to experience a heart attack or two to get their life together.

>>10213661
Thank f*ck

>>10217936

Yeah, that, bad habits, and compulsion issues including eating as comfort. Unfortunately, most fat people I know will comment every time I eat more than what they perceive as normal for me (normalizing their behaviors in the process seeing a skinny person do it once in a while), before they then stuff their face with I am not shitting you an entire box of oreos, or an entire pie, or something like that. They'll then go on to say how they're dieting really hard, exercising, trying every fad diet, etc, but will fall back to old habits within a week or two.

It's all anecdotal but it's kind of made me skeptical of most who claim that 'despite everything I'm still fat.' It's so easy to say that.

>>10213483
Fujiwara-san is most definitely older than mid-30s. She must be past 40

>>10217806
are you capable of describing her without resorting to anime comparisons or tvtropes? yikes, dude.

>>10217921
stay lonely and bitter forever, thanks

>>10217806

I think it's clear that you think she understands you.

Do you understand her? I'm not really getting that impression and it's very self centered, like she's the genki girl of your dreams or something like that, a weaboo version of a manic pixie girl.

>>10217913
I mean, I'm sure it's the case for some people but that's a pretty sweeping generalization. My point is people are fat for many reasons, some of them it's their fault, some it's not, so being shitty to fat people on principle is, well, shitty, because you don't know this person's life story, health, etc. It's seriously not hard to be a decent person.

>>10217944
Yeahhhhh sounds pretty unhealthy my guy.

>>10217921
If anything, aspies are over emotional because they're constantly questioning how they should be reacting to shit.
Aspie friend I knew had 0 emotioal distance from anything, especially if it was related to any one of his hobbies.
It's really draining to be around if you don't have the same autismo energy to put out.

all the talk of relationships makes me sad because i've considered giving up my boyfriend in exchange for lolita fashion.

>>10218005

Why?

If it because he's ambivalent about it, just let him know lolita fashion makes you happy.

If it's because he's constantly denigrating it and makes you feel bad for wearing it, fuck him.

>>10217944
There was one anime comparison in there. The "tvtropes" are actual Japanese terms that correctly describe things. It's not my problem if you only know them from anime.

>>10217913
I did not say it was easy, only simple. Someone can wake up any day of the week and resolve to practice an altered behavior without delving into all the issues, several entire mental health therapy modalities are based on just 'choosing healthier behaviors in the now' to develop new habits without months of trying to sort out past traumas before resolving behaviors. Simple practical things like 'stop eating junk' and 'put down the fork when 80% full'. It is not compassionate in the least to enable or condone destructive behavior like overeating to the point of overweight or obesity. Other cultures do not pussyfoot around the weight issue like burgerlanders. Fat is fat, and if you don't want the disadvantages of being fat, then stop being fat.

>>10217940
This. My frustration is that my fatter friends zero in so hard on the few times I indulge (nice tea party food, a good restaurant meal, occasional lush dessert) but they completely ignore the fact that my normal diet in my everyday eating is modest, low calorie mostly fresh foods and small meals, which I also enjoy. I post just as many good photos of my everyday food. I've nearly stopped commenting back at all when they say something because it has started to feel like bait at this point.

>>10218007
neither of those reasons actually. he actually doesn't mind and even likes some of my dresses.

it's cause i'm worried about how others perceive our relationship. i have a really deep anxiety about anyone in my community finding out anything undesireable in mine and my boyfriend's relationship. it's at the point where i don't feel uncomfortable showing affection to him 'cause i'm worried all it takes is one rumor or anything about our sex life getting out and my reputation in the community tanks.

i know it isn't healthy being this way considering i even stress about whether i can post something on my instagram or tumblr page, but idk what else to do really and i ain't have the guts to open up and talk to him about it and i definitely can't go to anyone in my community about it.

>>10218031
why would you want to be part of a comm that shuns you for your sex life?

>>10218031
Why are you giving your comm so much power and importance in your life? Are they really going to care that much about your relationship lol?

>>10218008
enjoy dehumanizing the girl you like by reducing her to a series of impersonal stereotype bullet points and being shocked when she inevitably drifts away from you once the honeymoon phase wears off

>>10218035
it's the only one i have. Plus, it's not like it's something that's gunna change if I go to a different one.

It's the same in online ones and irl ones. people always say how degenerates should get out of the fashion so i mean as much as i try to avoid any topic related to sex and kinks it comes up in some way cause someone brought it up. the only thing i can do is nod and agree cause arguing against it or a neutral in any way has never gone good.

hell, today lor uploaded a video abt it 'cause she got an email from one and naturally are pissed at her for not upsetting them by telling them to just get out of the fashion and the comments are a dumpster fire. it's never ending, i've reached a point where i really feel like i have to choose between one or the other.

like yeah i really shouldn't want to be apart of a community that shuns my sex life even if i don't drag them into it, but i also just love the fashion. i discovered the fashion before my sex life so i feel like i 'owe' it to the community as a whole to choose them.

>>10218043

idk whether they actually will or won't but i've made the mistake of effectively giving that power to the community as a whole because i internalize negativity. i try not to and i realize it's unhealthy so i don't blame anyone but myself for it.

either way, it's something that if found it would tank my reputation. i may just be overthinking it though because anxiety is a cowardly bitch.

>>10218051
She's obviously into him to get a long-term visa

>>10218064

Wait are you like a ddlg or something?

If you don't bring it up, they won't find out. Nor should they. I'm not a huge fan, but people can do whatever tf they want in the bedroom. And why is that stopping you from even taking pics with your bf for IG? Unless they can recognize him as some former Big Daddy on the scene?

>>10218064
Lol, as a fellow degenerate to another, just don't have your face on your fetlife. If you put it out there it's public.
Chances are very high you aren't the only one in your comm with proclivities.

>>10218066
>that whole last sentence
Why tf is this rediculous sentence in existence.

>tfw no rattlesnake shakin' sticky sweet lolita gf to take me to the top

>>10218077

I mean because her fear is a bit rIdiculous?

>>10218066

Eh not exactly. Not a little space thing, but something somewhat adjacent to it.

And the thing is, I don't. I never start the conversation. I try to avoid bringing up anything that can be vaguely considered sexual in any way. Someone else always does, this time it was bc of lor's video. even though she mentioned talking to people and perhaps educating them, that's only going to out me and accomplish absolutely nothing other than getting yelled at, the worst case I get booted out the comm, and they tell everyone so i can't start over in a new one and probably having people refuse to sell to me if things got widespread enough.

even though me and my dude keep everything explicit in the bedroom, i do things that aren't sexual that are looked down upon. i like heart shaped chokers and backpacks that say "baby girl" on them, and i don't like them bc of the kink or sex but just because I think they're cute things. Neither of us are recognized in the scene so that's a good thing, but it stops me from posting on my IG in general cause if I constantly second guess whether i'm violating someone's consent or not by posting even something vaguely sexual or teasing but not anything that violates IG TOS.

not to mention, i follow some people who aren't like into it, but they buy kink related stuff or buy stuff from shops that also sell kink and sex shit and i don't want anyone from my comm stumbling upon the people i follow on my IG because they found my IG and went through my followers or got recommended one because they followed me. even though my IG says semi-nsfw / 18+, i constantly second guess whether i'm exposing someone who isn't consenting to seeing it by virtue of posting in a tag or a certain tag, or whether i'm dragging the community down by posting about things related to my sex life on IG, and following people who do things related to it, etc. whether people are just suddenly going to hate me.

once again, over thinking bc aniexty but still.

>>10218064
Teebeehaych, most lolitas are filthy degenerates, i guarantee everyone in your comm has a fetlife profile.

>>10218072
Yeah I don't. I don't even post on my fetlife lmao. Plus the site kinda sucks for anything other than just finding munches to go to. I don't post my face on my IG or tumblr either and i prefer using those sites cause they're just more fluid and active than fetlife. but still, whole thing of second guessing whether i can post this vaguely sexual thing that isn't any worse than what Kim K or any other insta thot posts on their own nor breaking TOS is something wrong to do.

>>10218082
ngl i agree, my fear is ridiculous. It just comes from years of having people constantly say "get out the fashion" "I hate you", "you're gross" etc. etc. and even having gore sent to my NSFW blog. and i shouldn't have to worry about keeping multiple separate social medias just so no one finds me but I do anyways. i can't even so much as offer clarification or anything or explain to people in my comm or online that the conversations make me uncomfortable 'cause i just wanna avoid it in its entirety cause of how much of a dumpster fire it becomes.

>>10218051
Humans are not as complex as you think they are. Cry about it.

WTF is AP's problem with OPs? Deliberately cut to maximize boobloaf?

>>10218029
is it because you judge them openly? I can't see why else they would make comments about your eating, unless you mutually bully each other. what terrible, unhealthy friendships, my gosh.

>>10213661
they didn't make you empty your bowels with a colon cleanse 24 hours before colonoscopy???

>>10218172
Nayrt but people (men) comment on my eating every time I eat something ''bad'' and I'm average sized. They warn me to be careful of getting fat, or say things like ''you're so lucky you can stay skinny even though you eat so unhealthy!'' and sometimes mention that there could be fat around my organs even though I look ''skinny''. The only times I eat unhealthy is when I'm at someone's birthday or someone is treating me to something unhealthy.

So, grey gulls out there how do you cope with being an older (30+) person in fandom, my problem is my interest hasn't really waned, and after a few years of being uninvolved with the scene i'm not really sure where i belong now. If anything my desire to be involved is greater than it ever has been. Plus a lot of older fans i know obviously have responsibilities that prevent them from doing the 'con season' like they once did.

Smaller cons are very much a no-go as they are pretty much party cons for the younger fans, but the larger multi-interest cons where older people can blend in easier are so impersonal. I suppose i'm looking for something impossible, a community of fans who are cooler with older members, and chilled out small cons.

>>10218172
>unless you mutually bully each other
it's called banter
fucking hell, americans are thin-skinned

>>10218332
>americans are thin-skinned
Replace Americans with women.
I'm friends with a good amount of both genders. It feels like a lot of the women I'm friends with legitimately don't understand the idea of banter and consider that sort of behavior "toxic".
This entire board being mostly devoid of fun shitposting and bantz compared to every other board is a pretty good example of that.

>>10218172

I mean, nayrt, but I had a ridiculously toxic relationship with a perpetually jealous fatty. I don't think I ever instigated anything, in fact I always cheered on her weight goals. But along with a multitude of other issues, she'd always imply that somehow I was the unhealthier one and she just had bad genes, or metabolism, or whatever.

The other instances of this are mainly acquaintances I really don't give a shit about. They can say whatever, but I observe about the same. That being said, this is obviously not all fat people, but quite a few of them can be like this.

>>10217806
>like Osaka from Azumanga Daioh
>inside she's a total yamato nadeshiko
unbased and cringe. you sound insufferable.

>>10218101

>>10214015
SCP-106 has been recontained successfully

>>10218796

god fucking damnit anon why did you have to remind me of that. now i can't sleep.

>in group chat
>Friend talks about a doujin they just bought
>two other friends come in and shit on them for buying porn of some beefed up teen characters
>See those two exact friends post about figures they want on twitter
>Lo and behold the figures are of teen/child characters in sexualized costumes/positions

I know weebs are hypocrites but wow

>>10217765
>>10217882
>>10217907
>>10217913
>>10217923
>>10217936
Fuck, is it possible to not take bait for once, gulls?

Is 27 too old to be cosplaying? Is it only acceptable to LARP once you're 30 year old boomer?

Went to a con recently after not going to any for years and felt like a grandpa.

>>10214466