/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

When i'm all alone doing some normal stuff (playing Animal Crossing or browsing cute online shops for example) I act like a weeb sometimes and I'm so ashamed of it...

>>7354089
I wish there was a good place for honest and strict Lolita concrit with neither asspats nor malice.

>>7354089
>>7354098
Sometime I also act like if I was in an animu.
Hating myself for that.

>>7354102
This so much

>>7354089
I really hate when people try to drag all kinds of bizarre and unrelated shit into Lolita under the guise of 'Loliable', but I love to see Burando and other Lolita pieces in just regular fashion coordinates or other j-fash styles.

When I'm at a convention, I have to actively convince myself not to buy lacy cat ears or a crappy mini hat or an assload of that stupid yaoi fangirl merch because I'll hate it and hate myself for it later. It doesn't always work. I think weeb transfers by proximity sometimes.
Also, I want to own at least one horrifically ita dress. I have the design picked out already.

>>7354098

when I'm really drunk I become a weeb, it's like bruce banner and the hulk I don't know what's wrong with me

My lolita group are on a diet, only eating natural and healthy food, because we must have a healthy diet and good manners
When get home I eat giant bags of Cheetos like a farm pig

>>7354113
I think all that stuff is fine if you don't try to fly it as serious lolita fashion. On-purpose ita just for fun is cute sometimes as long as you call it what it is. Ditto for cosplay lolita stuff at cons.
>captcha = lettig out

>>7354116
You made me lol with the comparison
Now I picture a Hulk but in Weaboo version with cat ears, a yaoi paddle and an ita dress...
My shameful confession: I have a fake "kawaii tsun bishie desu" persona (I'm a guy,22,pretty decent in general beside) and I secretly deeply wish to be e-famous like those "kawaii bishies" also called emofags (Chris Dakota,Frank Wolf, Alex Evans,...), being nice with my fans and make them smile without being retarded tho...

>>7354098
>>7354106
I know that feel

Excuse my english, not my mother language (born in Quebec)

>>7354113
I feel you anon.You're not alone...
(Love this thread)

>>7354116
>>7354116
Crappy MS Paint drawing but still.
(couldn't draw the yaoi paddle)

>>7354089
I miss old school a lot...
Also not my confession but I remember some girl I used to know back then masturbating to lolita brand dresses (yeah, lolita burando dresses) and I was scared of her.

I want to buy a dress from milano just to see how horrible it will turn out.

I really want to be an efamous lolita.
I used to be ~tumblr famous~ and even had people recognise me in the street/internet fakes etc and I kinda miss it.

>>7354176
Who were you?

>>7354171
>not my confession

I want to be an efamous trap specializing in lolita and jfashion. But I mean efamous in a good way... not in a zerodomon/gutterface way.

>>7354113
Thank goodness I'm not the only one. I was seriously considering the electronic cat ears at the first large-scale anime convention I attended. Glad I resisted. I didn't know what furries were at that point.

>>7354194
>>7354176
Let's be e-famous together!!
I wish I was a cute e famous trap-chan too...

When I'm second/third person in line for buying a dress, I start praying they're fatty-chans who won't be able to fit it. I feel terrible afterwards...but I still do it...

>>7354171
>masturbating to lolita brand dresses
I guess you could really call her...
A brandwhore!

I weeb out in private like whoa. Like, disgustingly annoying and enthusiastic about everything anime. The only friend I have who's as weeaboo as I am is moving away, and I don't know if I'm in lesbians with her or if I'm confusing it with the fear of losing the only friend who accepts my faggotry.

We wore cat ears, OTKs, and SNK capes together, and watched Ghiblies together, and squealed over merch, and co-wrote hot r-18 yaois, and over-complimented each other, and yellow fevered all over Kpop and Jpop stars, and giggled through panels, and shared cups, and played eroge.

I may come off as stuck up and rude and even elitist, but I'm the absolute worst weeb there is behind closed doors. And now I have to spazz out alone.

>>7354281
OMG DID YOU JUST

>>7354295
I-I kinda feel you...

I'm always tempted to selfpost in ita/best coord thread to see what kind of responses I get.

>>7354295
What is it with women nowadays thinking they're lesbians when they feel any inkling of an emotion towards another female.
She's your best friend, stupid, of course you love her (as a friend), of course you care about her.
Who brainwashed y'all to think normal women are only and exclusively catty and jealous towards each other? Sheesh.

There's a reason I just can't bring myself to laugh or feel disgusted at young ita girls that act stupid at cons. It's because I used to act like one and so I know that they are just having a good time without thinking that they are laughingstock. Also, elitist bitches are the worst.

>15/16 year old me.
>Getting into lolita but without a clear vision of what's ita and what's not, even though I'm registered in a kinda well-known forum comm.
>Wardrobe consists only of a pair of RHS, a nice BL skirt and a horrible halloween costume-tier dress from the same brand.
>Lolifriend tells me that our little city is going to hold its very first con.
>Feel excited (it's my very first con) and make a forum post to organize a meet up with girls from the same area.
>All of them are more or less my age except for some chick who is in her 30s.
>Con day arrives.
>I wear the shitty BL dress instead of the somewhat decent skirt because lolifriend encouraged me to do so. Years after, I learned that she wanted me to look like shit so she could look good.
>The rest of the girls wear ebay shit and BL borderline cosplay dresses.
>We are a bunch of fucking weebs but we are having a good time with our shitty dresses.
>Old chick appears. She wears some burando shoes, skirt and bag.
>It's obvious that the feels uncomfortable surrounded by girls way younger than her and doesn't interact with us, she only looks at us with a disgusted look on her face.
>Too retarded to notice. However, lolifriend and I start talking a little with her and showing interest on her burando.
>A couple of hours later she leaves but tells us before that she had a great time with us.

Next day
>Lolifriend sends her an email asking how is she doing.
>She replies, saying we are a bunch of pathetic weebs and that we smelled like shit.
>Friend tells me. Too beta for confronting the old bitch.
>Just send her an email apologizing about our behavior.

>>7354455
I know that she was within her rights to think that we were a bunch of retarded weebs. But, up to this day, I still think that's kinda pathetic for a grown up woman to start telling a teen off when she just wanted to have a nice chat with her. There's a lot of ways to tell someone that his/her behavior isn't the best, but that wasn't one of them.

Also, I used to be a little clingy with cosplayers I liked. When I took a picture with them I liked to take them by the arm without thinking they would find that uncomfortable. I was too much excited to ever consider that. I feel like shit when you guys tell all those horror stories because I could have totally been "that weeb".
I even tried to forget about this phase of mine by deleting all the photos from those cons.

>>7354441
Well, actually, I like girls to begin with, so the confusion does not come from her being a girl, but rather how attached I am to her despite her telling me verbatim that she's "grown out of me". I know she just saw me as an idiot friend, and now she just sees me as an immature aspie, but I wanted her to look at me differently.

I can be relaxed, I don't have to be spastic, but I don't grow out of things. Feels bad man.

>>7354118
This is even a thing?

I don't dress full J-style, but I cosplay and get occasional pieces from TaoBao for daily wear. Pastels, earth tones, some shiny, happy themed all along, cutesy because I'm short and people tell me it's cute that way

And yet I do, from time to time, visit /fa/ and drool at all that simple elegance that comes from monochrome looks with layering, no patterns, no happy bullshit and think oh man, I'm such a loser and mentally 5 years old. Fml

>>7354749
Why not both?

I love the late 19th/early 20th century fashion (anything pre-WWII too, really) and it suits me like a dream. But I'm scared of drawing inspiration from it and incorporating it into my outfits because I just know I'll get called a granny or a prude or uptight, or simply a freak. I love old silent films too and that historical period in general, but whenever I tell anyone they just snub me off as 'lol you are such a hipster'.

>>7354749

this, I'm /fa/ and /cgl/ monochrome on the streets and lolita at tea

>>7354116
>>7354130
>>7354295
These are the most adorable "shameful secrets" ever

>>7354760
It's kind of disappointing that sometimes when a girl wants to take her knickers off everyone defends her and says it's empowerment, and that it's "normal" to look like a slag at 15, all that bullshit about "freedom of expression" and "you can dress how you want", but put on a conservative outfit and you're called names.
Not always, but it shouldn't happen ever.
I'm sorry anon.

>>7354440
Me too anon. I want to self post in ita threads just to see if I look as bad as I worry that I do and maybe pick up some con crit. Pretty sure that no matter where I post though the only concrit offered will be lose weight or stop wearing lolita, fatty-chan

>>7354749
A-Are you my exact opposite?
>be a tall genderqueer girl more on the boy side, short black hair and shit.
>into elegant monochrome clothing and shit
>Secretly drool over some qt pastel clothes on Taobao and shit
>Oh man wish I had the balls to be a qt patootie somedays but don't wanna break my """manly""" wall and shit.

You're not a loser or mentally 5 years old. You rock.

>>7354788
(second "shameful secret here" ah uh uh)

>>7354813
But...you're not fat!! You're fluffy.

I was dating a man in his 40s and I broke up with him when I got into lolita because I didn't want people to think that me dating an older man and dressing like a little girl were in any way related. I'm glad I did because a family member who never knew about the boyfriend likes to tease me about lolita being a fetish and asks rude questions like do I like to wear diapers during sex

I'm somewhat efamous, and I'm told all the time how sweet and cute I am, irl and online, but it just makes me feel so guilty. Nobody would like me if they knew how much of a racist bitch I really am.

>>7354760
I'm not gonna lie, I'd love to see an Edwardian era-inspired outfit.

A "friend" of mine is slagging off other lolita's all the time and it's really starting to piss me off. Every day its "She's fat/ She's an ita/She's a brandwhore" and I really wanna explode but I know if I say who it is they'll know it's me and may attack me as well. I am completely unsure how to handle this, it's hard to get cap's because most of it is done by word of mouth and any slagging off they do is hidden behind anon.

>>7354858
BtB? Put in 'hints' on who it is, make it obvious as.

>>7354855
why do you say you're racist?

>>7354821
>want to be pretty and nice and make people smile

this makes me so happy for some reason

>>7354858
Tried that before and it didn't work.

>>7354870
Send an anonymous email? Post her on 4chan?

>>7354874
Well it's a brolita to be fair and I tried calling her out behind anon before but they got all their "fans" to defend them.
I'm at my limit on this bullshit.

>>7354821
You must be new here. Maybe elsewhere I could be a "marshmallow girl" but on 4chan I will forever be a landwhale/hambeast/whatever other insult is popular now

>>7354876
It's a brolita calling out other lolitas? Oh boy

I'm the definition of ita

And a bro

It's a disaster. But I enjoy myself. I would just never post a picture of myself here.

>>7354881
Yes, but she prefers to be called she which I guess is understandable but her bullying of people is going to far and I am unsure how to handle this. I know if I call out her name she'll act dumb and play the victim. Especially since I can not prove what she is doing since a lot of it again is behind anon and by word. I do know people are catching onto her but she's started attacking new people just getting into the fashion, like girls only 14 years of age you know? Which is completely uncalled for.

>>7354879
I lurked for 3 years but I post since less than a month.
Ooorrr you could totally ignore what 4chan says and don't care at all and be a happy marshmallow girl 4evah?
>>7354869
It makes me so happy to make people happy dear anon. Since I'm kind of a trans I don't know if people would like me...Plus some little **** had a vendetta against me, selfposted as me and samefagged to make me seems like a little sh*t two years ago. So I'm hiding forever in shame.

>>7354902
I mean two month ago*
Need to focus when write

>>7354902
I feel your feel bro, happened to me and 4chan laughed at me for a week or two...vendetta chans are such immature little twats
Here's an image to make you feel better

>>7354855

Just remember that "Racist" is about what you DO, not what you ARE or THINK

>>7354857
Pic related
Google, anon. Anon, google. Perhaps you two might have a nice little rendezvous at times like these.

It would be more of a challenge to find something not tried with Lolita + X = mashup if it's at all likely.

>>7354867
I'm natsoc. One of my best friends is dating a black guy and thought makes me sick. I don't hate nonaryans, but I want them out of my country.

>>7354130
Awwww I want to kiss your probably 7/10 face bishie-kun.

Sometimes I day dream about how I would go robbing the wardrobes of lolitas in my local comm. How I'd get away with it, how I'd break in to their home, ect.

>>7354981
you do know what aryan really means, right?

>>7354999
A-Anon kun...
Some people told me I looked a bit like Frank Wolf so it made me feel better? I look very young (16 and I'm actually 22) and very feminine faced (always being called "madam" in stores)...

>>7355013
You're not alone with this one. He he. I always day dream about that as well

I wear goth, everything in my house is either black or white and carefully chosen. I'm known as a mature person who adores elegant styles and watches old black and white films, ect.
But secretly, I wish I was immature enough to wear sweet and act cute and put stickers and decora over everything. I wanna have plush teddies everywhere and make youtube videos like Princess Peachie, with everything in my house being pink and other pastel colours. But I couldn't stand the embarrassment of drastically changing my taste like that, I can only afford to be one or the other. My friends all love my gothic look and would probably all look at me like I have two heads if I started wearing AP and painting the walls pink.

>>7354951
Oh no, I'm talking about normalfag clothes. With loli it's totally possible without seeming odd (for a lolita outfit). I assumed OP was talking about normalfag clothes too.

>>7355035
Try "bittersweet"?

>>7355045
There's some nice things if you google 'modern Edwardian or that + dress

>>7355053
I tried doing that. Every time I try wearing a black colourway of a sweet print (milky berry, ect) I just feel like a whore, some grown ass woman trying to wear children's clothing and I feel stupid.

>>7354951
why is a pie part of the coordinate?

>>7355095
I actually feel the opposite sometimes, anon... Maybe do sweet occasionally? I'm planning on adding some gothic to my wardrobe soon. If you have your own place you could always have one or two pink rooms, even if that would be sorta awkward...

>>7355097
It's the most important part.

>went to a con with my brolita best friend
>come back to the hotel room after walking around all day
>I was a little drunk
>raped him
I wonder if it haunts me as much as it haunts him.

>>7355182
Details

>>7355182
This made up shit

>>7355182
Meh, as long as you didn't get his frills dirty

>>7354295
I wish I had that with someone!
I only have my older brother to go turbo-weeb with. I appreciate that I at least have SOMEONE, but it isn't as cool as what you have!

>>7355097
Maybe collage-chan was hungry while making the coord? Mmmm, that color looks like biscut crust, oh, apple green too...mmmm...pie...

>>7354815
>and shit
>and shit
>and shit
>and shit

>>7355214
and then?

>>7354295
Weebing out in private is fucking amazing though. It's when you bring it to public or post your shit on tumblr and YouTube like Nino Swears when it gets disgusting.
I wish I had a friend or group of friends to have watch parties and weeb out in my apartment with.,

>>7354430
Yes I just.

>>7355097
Clearly, it must be the headwear. I'd wear a pie on my head. fuck yeah.

>>7354295
Where do you live? I'll be your friend. I weeb out in private too. It's sad because I love eroge and guilty pleasure animes like kill la kill but none of my female friends do.

>>7355192
It wasn't super violent or anything. I just like joking and teasing and hugging him, he started acting a little uncomfortable and then I kinda wrestled on him on the bed a bit. After a couple of seconds he stopped... resisting. He just kinda... went limp and let me do my thing. I didn't even notice that he was quietly sobbing until I finished. Then when it was done he put on the clothes I removed, stuffed his things into his suitcase, and quickly shuffled out without a word. Next morning I went home, spent the next week texting him and waiting in my apartment for the police to come get me, and nothing ever happened. I have *no* earthly idea why I did it, I've never anything like this, I've never laid a hand on anyone in my life. I was just a little drunk and thought that he liked me.... It was a complete lapse of sanity.

>>7354441
This. Society brainwashes a lot of people to think anything more than a hug with the same sex = gay feelings
I hate people like >>7354295 the most. Trust me, when you're craving pussy, you're gay.

>>7355245
jesus christ
have you apologized at least
also male rape victims rarely take legal action because of the shame associated with it

>>7355245

>>7355245
Go get help you fucking psychopath

>>7354981
lol wut are you high non-aryan doesn't mean what you think it means you dumb cunt go educate yourself and get over your stupid entitled racist feelings

>>7355245
>it wasn't violent
>I raped him
>he cried
I honest to god hope that you kill yourself. Just do it

>>7354855
What is somewhat efamous? Isn't it like being pregnant? Either u are or u aren't?

>>7354118
That sounds retarded, I mean I can understand eating healthy and clean on a lolita meet, but doing a "group diet" sounds pointless especially when there are people who don't actually want to follow it

>>7355182
>>7355245

He remembers he remembers he remembers and he remembers
This is your BEST FRIEND. Do not ignore it and assume he's forgotten. Do not try to pretend it never happened.
Talk to him.
Beg forgiveness.

Acknowledging what you did and acknowledging that you know it was wrong and acknowledging that he has every right to be traumatized by the event is the very least you could do for him.

You were someone he could trust. You spat in his face. Try and fix this. Do not sit by as someone closest to you grows cold.

Time will not fix this. Only you can fix this.

>>7355287
No it's not. Groups of friends often diet and exercise together, it's even recommended for accountability and motivation. I'm sure she wants to follow it but seems to be having a more difficult time.

>>7355256
Of course, I've apologized over and over. I tried to write him a check, offered to do anything sexual he wanted.. In retrospect those are pretty shitty ways to apologize but I just didn't know how to make it up to him, I don't think there's anything I could do that could even remotely make up for what I did. I don't think he wants to see or talk or to me either.

>>7355269
>kill yourself
Strongly considering it.

>>7355245
It doesn't matter that it wasn't super violent you still raped your best friend which is honestly one of the most horrible things that you can do you to someone. He most definitely remembers whether he will ever talk about it or not is different especially with the stigma that Males can't be raped (by females). Why are people so cruel? I hope you have apologised anon but he has every right to never forgive you. Please never do that to anyone again, you can ruin lives and for what? Having a bit of fun?

>>7355304
Holy shit anon go get therapy and leave him the fuck alone. You are such a shitty person.

>>7355304
You tried to make up for raping him by offering sexual favors? Jfc are you dumb? That's like ribbing salt in the wound!

>>7355304
>rape someone
>offer them money
>offer to have sex with them

fucking really anon?

dude you need help, you must be an actual psychopath if you think he wants either of those things from you. if i was raped and my attacker offered to have sex with me or give me money it would just make me feel more violated. you need to leave him alone for a while while you get therapy, and acknowledge what you did was horribly wrong and he has every right to never trust you or think of you as a friend again. get therapy, fast.

and after you get help you need to write him a sincere apology, detailing that you understand what you did was a complete violation of his trust in you as a friend, and that you can never truly understand the pain and trauma he will have to deal with to recover.

I went to Japan for my 21st birthday. I think I was still too young to travel but I don't regret the experience because I have a better understanding of shrines and temples. Now that I'm older I know I was a gigantic weeb for doing it, but also fortunate enough to learn from traveling abroad. I still have the bowing tendency though and it's sort of embarrassing when I have to stop myself because it's 'strange' here.

>>7355304
> I tried to write him a check, offered to do anything sexual he wanted.. In retrospect those are pretty shitty ways to apologize
What do you view him as, your whore?
"Thanks for the sex, let me pay you"
"I bet you liked it, we can do it again"

You consider those 'pretty shitty'? How about, I don't think that you've got a 'lapse of insanity' I think you're just not very good at this whole 'empathy' thing.

There is nothing more you can do. It's not "let me do nice things for you to make up for it", it's

"wow, I recognize that that was rape, yes R-A-P-E. You did not deserve that and I don't deserve having someone as wonderful as you as a friend. I'm so sorry that I've completely obliterated our friendship. I will now never speak to you unless you approach me. If you choose to forgive me, that is up to you. I hope that you won't run into anyone else like me ever again. You don't deserve that. Good bye"

>>7355304
Those things are in no way, shape or form and apology at all, and I'm surprised you don't realise that even as you type that out. I think you need therapy, and to offer to pay for HIS therapy.

>>7355304
I bet you expected us to tell you it's not the end, and how to make it up to him.

You can't. You need to go to jail, or therapy, or both.

killing yourself would be pathetic because it would be robbing him of his right to see you punished.

>>7355349
I don't know, if my rapist killed themselves with a letter that laid themselves out as a rapist and told about how they didn't deserve to breathe the same air as me anymore... Might be a little satisfying.
Alternatively, it could eat up anon's friend even more. I bet he could turn it into blaming himself. "If I had just enjoyed it, or stopped her, or anything, this wouldn't have happened and I wouldn't have lost my friend and she wouldn't be dead. This is my fault".

So yeah, I'd say that possibility is too risky to warrant suicide to be the right option.

>>7355304
The most important thing here is: are you a landwhale, an 8/10 or an at least fuckable gurl?

>>7355457
I'm not ugly. I'm 5'5, 103 lbs. He's 6'0 and 130-140 lbs or something like that (really thin). He could have *easily* stopped me... Not that that makes it ok or anything.

>>7355336
>>7355326
I only made those offers when apologies didn't get through to him.. I was calling, texting, messaging around the clock for days and getting nothing. Finally he (very politely) told me that he wanted to be left alone, and I haven't talked to him since. I fully understand that I raped him, it was completely unforgivable, and I would do anything to take it back. I've made clear those feelings to him too. But I mean, he was already pretty shy to begin with, I don't think he has a lot of friends. I utterly betrayed him and I doubt he'll ever want anything to do with me again.

I haven't talked to a therapist about it because from what I understand they're obligated to go to the police about stuff like this. I mean, this is a confession thread right?

>>7355519
I'm convinced you're trolling, and if you're not. Call the police and turn yourself in or kill yourself after writing a proper apology.

>>7355519
Please DON'T kill yourself, what you did was wrong, but it's sick that people are asking you to end your life. I would do my best to apologize and tell him you were wrong, then leave him alone if I were you.

>>7355559
>don't kill yourself rapist-chan

>>7355519
>I only made those offers when apologies didn't get through to him.. I was calling, texting, messaging around the clock for days and getting nothing
Are you trying to defend those offers? Stop. The only response you should be feeling about those offers is utter shame and embarrassment. You pestering him and not getting a response (IMAGINE THAT) does NOT make it okay for you to offer money and sex. Offering that was sick and wrong and you need to recognize that. No excuses.

You should have given him a letter/text/voicemail like here >>7355336 and then not speak to him until/if he came to you. You didn't do that, so the only thing you can do now is respect his request and not speak to him anymore.

Therapists are not obligated to go to the police over matters that already happened. It says in the contract you sign, there are only two reasons: If you are going to seriously hurt yourself or if you are going to seriously hurt others. You can tell your therapist lots of illegal things you've done.
The idea here would be to prevent a tragedy, not to find justice for a crime.

>>7354754
>>7354774
>>7354815
Ahhhh, I'm so jealous. I can't into both styles because of budget and indecisiveness. Whenever I shop I think 'Okay, white-black-charcoal ONLY' but as soon as I see something fuzzy and cute I squeal on the inside and, oh god, hope it's not on sale.

>just splurged on a heart shaped pink with gold shimmer cross body clutch
>love it, goes with almost everything I own
>'yeah this is totally not what I was supposed to shop for gj'

>tfw no money, dream dressed and cute new prints/re-releases pop out of every nook and cranny
>tfw have money, nothing I like for sale anywhere

>>7354754
expect horrible unmatchy wardrobe?

I'm attracted to someone who cosplays the same characters as me and kind of want to fuck them because we're both hot.

Lame, I know. I'm taken, so maybe that spices it up a bit.

I just want people to like me but every attempt at doing so has made everyone hate me instead. I'm a doormat and people take advantage of that, I get mad and lash out, and grow even more bitter and cold.

>>7355856
I think we all know that feel.

>you decide to buy something that you like, that isn't a dream dress
>tfw your actual dream dress comes up within an hour of paying for the other item and you don't quite have enough for both

I can't sell things. I'm worried that I'm turning into a lolita hoarder. I have more dresses and skirts than I could use in four months of daily wear, but every time I try to sell something, I have an emotional break down and shove it all back into the closet.

I almost feel like giving my mom guidelines (blouses, socks, etc. stay) and let her cull the closet on my behalf. Maybe get one of my lolita friends to help her price it on ebay or something.

>>7355857
Nah. Just two separate wardrobes.

I am the thinnest I've ever been, but I still feel like a hambeast. I'll never be able to rock cute drapy mori-like clothes because of my fucking mediterranian hips and huge saggy ass tits. I hate myself.

On the day I'm just an awesome lolita
In night I'm BatLolita, catching all itas and put them on jail

>>7356087
If you have space to store it neatly, isn't it just your collection?
If it really makes you feel bad, why not set a selling goal and buy something luxe like a hime dress with the proceeds?
Misako said she has over 100 Lilota dresses, then giggled.
But if it makes you feel bad, there might be something behind it.
Also why no wardrobe post?

>>7356122
I don't wear lolita nearly often enough to justify keeping it all. I work a lot, so I'm often unable to attend meet-ups on weekends, and I buy things when I'm stressed that I don't touch for months. It feels like I'm possibly wasting the dresses, since I'm sure someone else would love to wear them all more regularly.

>why no wardrobe post?
Three reasons, really.

1. This is the first year that there hasn't been ridiculous "sugar daddy!" and "dick sucker!" accusations levelled at large or enviable wardrobes. That has always made me wary.

2. While I have a BIG wardrobe, I only have a handful of enviable/coveted pieces. I kind of thought about doing a "best of", but chickened out.

3. Photographing everything is a commitment I don't really have time for. Again, the idea to do a "best of" post.

>>7355857
Nope, it's not that hard. If each new piece goes in at least one outfit you have already as well as the new outfit you are planning everything works. In extreme opposite styling this, of course doesn't work but my non-lolita wardrobe is full of dark flowy things. I don't expect or require them to match my pastel frills. In my case several of my Lolita things do cross over because I started with basic black gothic Lolita skirts and blouses with jewelry that fits both styles.

>>7356126
>This is the first year that there hasn't been ridiculous "sugar daddy!" and "dick sucker!" accusations levelled at large or enviable wardrobes.
Ugh, ok, now I get it
How about culling your least favorites a few at a time on the sales comm and upgrading to more of your own dream dresses since your time to wear them is so limited?
The stress shopping was what I was wondering about, that can be a miserable trap.

>>7354934
Do and say anon. do and say.

>>7355074
Thanks for the tip! I just run into a lot of themed outfits inspired by Downton Abbey, but a lot of those are the flashy Oriental-style pre-war clothes and not the corseted, toned down dresses and coats with giant hats that I was aiming for.

>>7355519
they're not obligated to go the police. are you fucking stupid? they're only obligated to go if you're an immediate danger to yourself or others, and you already raped your best friend. your weird pseudo-excuses show you don't really understand what you did even though you say you do. Don't defend yourself anymore. Go to a fucking therapist.

The more you post, rapist-chan, the more you seem like an actual psychopath. Your lack of empathy was totally apparent when you called your raping your best friend a "lapse in sanity" and mentioned you didn't notice he was crying until it was over. I mean, who does that? Jesus christ. Get professional help.

>>7355519
Go to the police yourself. If you confess, you might get a smaller punishment, not that you should or anything.

>>7354455
I wasn't even ita (just kind of meh) and I think the same way. I don't like either side being bitchy just because someone wears all brand or is Itazilla, it's none of your damn business what they're gonna wear. Concrit is great but many mistake "u luk stoopid lel" for concrit.

>>7355519
>tfw a female raping a male isn't a big deal

>>7356390
Have you read the thread at all? People are blowing up at this psycho for what they did, I'd say that constitutes a big deal.

>>7356391
So happy that there is atleast a little bit of fate here.

>>7356374
Yeah, those are kind of costume-y. I like vintage but 1920's is more reasonably in my size range or budget if it's the real deal. I only have a couple of day dresses and 3 hats then the beaded dresses that are reproductions. I also like the idea of more subdued historically inspired pieces incorporated into modern styling so I search things.

>>7356390
because that's not possible unless if you are gay

>>7356117
>batlolita
>bot punisherlolita
no kill policy sucks

>>7355245
Why didn't he stop you? If I ever had sex with a girl and the next day was told I'd raped her because she was too scared to say "stop" I'd be fucking pissed.

>>7356429

>>7356437
for real though, I'm being serious? I don't want to sound edgy or be an ebic trell but I just don't understand why the guy didn't ask her to stop...

>>7355245
>>7355304
>>7355519
Ngl, you're kind of a shit person from the looks of things.
The fact that you're using these fucking anime reaction images for all this just makes it look like you're either making up shit to troll /cgl/ or that you really aren't taking what you did seriously on some level. Do you not understand the repercussions of RAPING someone?
>offered to do anything sexual he wanted
Full retard. Retrospect? Use some common sense.
In all likelihood, your friendship is ruined and you've really messed him up both emotionally and mentally. Congratulations.

>>7356440
People's responses to traumatic situations vary from person to person. Some completely shut down (like anon's ex-best friend), some try to fight.

Try being in a situation like that where you feel completely scared and powerless. It's difficult to even shout even if you can/should.

>>7356456
what's traumatic about it though? When I've had girls come on to me that I didn't want to deal with I just politely told them I wasn't interested. Boom. Problem solved? Maybe I'm just ignorant of how certain people react to different situations but this doesn't make a lick of sense to me. All the posts telling Anon to kill herself were totally undeserving, also.

>>7356464
That's not going to stop a rapist though. Many women aren't interested in having a STD-riddled penis shoved into them either, nor do they like being called sluts and told that "they want this". It happens because they're scared that if they fight back, it'll be worse.

>>7356464
You're ignorant. Just because you react a certain way to girls coming on to you, doesn't mean others will react the same. You don't share the same personality and background. Anon's ex-best friend had a lot of trust in her to not hurt him. But she completely violated that despite physical signs he gave her. He was scared, confused, and then betrayed. Obviously I don't know the guy and can infer from only the anon's story.

Not everyone can "stop" themselves from being violated even if it's "easy" to do.

Anon should live with the consequences and get help. She is a shitty person but she has the capability to change to a better person when she stops making excuses for herself.

>>7356464
If a male fights back to a female rapist, the police won't believe him. Then, if he goes to the police or not, she can go to the police herself and claim he assaulted or raped her and the signs of struggle will be used against him. Maybe im making too bold an assumption here, but a fucking frail skin and bones guy wearing a petticoat and a frilly dress with bows doesn't seem like kind of person to defend himself with violence or risk being fucked by the police system.

>>7356475
>>7356477
>>7356480

]You made some fair points, I'll bare this shit in mind next time I'm about to get lucky. Thanks for not just sperging out and calling me a victim shamer or some shit.

>>7356079
Start by liking yourself

>>7356586
I'm a piece of shit so that's kind of tough.

>>7355250
But I already know that I'm gay. That's not the issue at all.

>>7356628
We know, it wasn't about you anymore, they were probably just talking in general.

>>7356638
I just don't want anon-chan to hate me.

I feel so inadequate and horrible when it comes to Lolita. I feel too fat, my choices in clothes are still super ita. I've only been actively buying Lolita since last October and I know I've gained weight during the holidays. I really want to just give up and not touch Lolita ever again but seeing gorgeous releases and peoples coords makes me want to dress in frills. I want to be beautiful already.

>>7356651
Exercise, lurk more on coord thread, read magazines. You need to feel comfortable with yourself. Try not to dwell on instant gratification. If you want to take some time away from Lolita, do so. If you like popular things, you will be able to find what you want. It will just take some time.

I got into cosplay and even manga/anime just because I wanted to fuck cute girls wearing costumes. Nowadays cosplaying is a huge motivation for me to work out and improve my sewing/propmaking skills, but I feel odd lying to my female friends that I got into it "because I wanted to create something amazing".
Then again, that's probably 90% of all male cosplayers.

>>7356139
It really is. I don't spend much money on anything but lolita, but working stupid hours at a fairly menial job results in a lot of tension/stress, so I end up going auction diving pretty regularly.

I'm also terrified that once I've finished my degree, it's not going to get better or that I'll have wasted my time going to college, just to stay in the job where I am now.

I love to dress lolita and go to meetings, but, because I'm ugly as hell, when I saw all people there are prettier than me, I became gloomy and get out

>>7357150
I'm so glad there is another person who feels this way. Even made a BTB post about it just the other day.

>>7357150
Except I don't go to meets because I ran out of things to wear and no cab money :p

>>7357150
omg me too :<
even though I was told I looked nice I refused to take any pics and even when someone accidentally twinned with me and wanted to take a pic I said no because I was so shy and thought I looked horrid compared to her. Though honestly if I told /cgl that the girl was some one that was somewhat notable here they might say otherwise about her looks.

>>7357298
I should've did that when I did my first ever cord. But no, was just ready for a pic...until i SAW the picture. It's ita as fuck, I kinda want to post it to the ita thread but I am scared.

>>7357145
I hope it gets better. If I were your local friend, I would sort your clothes for you and help you get your wardrobe in order. But I'd want to try it all on, haha!

>>7355329
>21
>Too young to travel

Wait, what? Is this a common viewpoint? You are a full grown adult years before 21.

>>7356114
Same with tits, I have an extra portion of tits that should be on my ass.

>>7355329
Too young to travel? Really? Shit brah, I went on a plane overseas when I was fucking ten.

>>7356847
>cosplaying is a huge motivation for me to work out

Me too, when I am getting tired, I get pumped for the next set by thinking about getting big and cosplaying some badass.

I think I'm starting to get feelings for a lolita friend; we're pretty close, we weeb out together, we complain about the same things and really enjoy each other's company. She's straight and has already a significant other. It's terrible because whenever I'm with her I can only think about eating her juicy and plump pussy and burying my face into her soft, milky tits. I'm disgusting.

I still think of my ex daily, and I wish I could stop.

I often think about running into my ex at a con. In reality it should be no big deal, but it's still something I think about a lot.

>>7357427
>>7357441 Were you alone? Because damn...

We all know that age has no meaning upon the way we act. I was still pretty immature and probably added to the stereotyping of foreigners.

>>7356079
I know that feel anon. Even with my own parents, everyone else seems to live for what the can get out of people instead of living for others.
Have you tried a repetitive hobby? For me knitting at the end of the day or when I'm really stressed calms me down.

>>7356428
Clearly you never read the bat comics from the 80's. The bat-tank and guns killed.

>>7357528
Alone on the plane. I met a family that knew my German teacher when I got off though.

>>7357475
>soft milky tits
That sounds like an AP print.

>>7355329

I just went to Japan for my 21st too. I went back a few months later because I loved it so much. I was living abroad in Korea on my own at the time, however. I guess it varies person by person, but I think I was perfectly capable of living and travelling abroad on my own...

I do the bowing though, well, more like a nod of the head after checking out, or talking, especially to my Korean professor. I also always hand over money with two hands now. it's just a quirk I guess.

>>7355245
Must be the ultimate why boner

>>7355245
Did he get hard?

>>7357925
>I'm still fucking monitoring this thread
Yes he did. Not immediately, it took a while.

I'm drunk right now, thinking about driving to his apartment and getting on my hands and knees and begging for forgiveness. Good idea y/n/?

>>7355245
who does this shit? who just does "their thing" without any verbal or emotional go ahead from the other person? you're a piece of shit.

there's someone talking shit about my friend
i dont know if i should tell her or if its better to just let sleeping dogs lie
it is someone she already dislikes ( and knows that she dislikes her back ) so it isnt when someone is talking behind her back
also this awful girl is 'popular' so i think saying something will just lead to too much trouble
( sorry for my english )

>>7357937
maybe a good idea would be for you to stop drinking. at least respect his wishes and leave him alone.

>>7357937
stop bothering that poor guy
leave him alone, he's traumatized enough

>>7357937
don't do it. leave him alone. he doesn't have to forgive you and you shouldn't expect him to if you guilt him into it.

god the more you post the worse you sound. go to bed, anon. call a therapist in the morning.

>>7357950
if its online, don't tell her.
it ruins a good mood. plus, she could handle it poorly.
if its offline, and you know who it is? tell her

the only reason i want to lose weight and look good is because i want to look like an ~animu girl desu~

mfw im 5'10" and 165 and that shit won't happen.
mfw i have no face.

>>7358014
no one on this ungodly earth can ever look animu, does that soothe you?

>>7357441
was it to a place of native language or heritage to you?

One of my lolita friends has fibromyalgia and I'm so close to cutting her out of my life.

She's very sweet, but all she ever does is drag me down.
>Anon, I'm too tired
>Anon, let's leave, I want to go home
>Anon, I don't want to go to that meetup because I don't like where we're eating
>Anon... you're going to that meetup without me...?
>Anon, I heard you went to a meetup. You didn't even invite me

My community hates me because of her. They don't say anything, but I can see their pursed lips and thinking "why the fuck did she bring her - again." My friend loves the fashion so much but she's been secluded from society for such a long period amount of time that she's horrible at meeting new people and making new friends. I also can't tell her to fuck off because of how horrible her depression is.

This sounds so awful but I wish someone would befriend her and take her away from me

>>7358035
Oh poor gal. I have fybromyalgia too and I try my best to not do that to any of my friend, because it's really horrible.
I think if you explain her quietly and offer her to help organize a meet at home or something like that, it may be good for both her and your comm.
She is latching on you because she want to feel normal, fibromyalgia is a bitch and she don't want to feel alone. Plus she must really fear of fainting/falling if she is alone, that's why she ask you to leave the meet with her. Same for the 'I don't like where we are eating'. If it has stairs or is high on a hill or non pratical for handicaped people, she must feel really traped.
She just don't want to make the comm care for her, so she release it on you because you're her friend. You don't have to please her, and despite her depression you can call here out but don't forget she is in constant pain and desper, that's why she is so difficult to deal with.
Good luck anon

>>7354440
I self posted in best coord thread and nobody bated an eye

>dress boldly and have choppy haircut, big eyes
>been told by a few people now that I look like a cartoon character
>secretly overjoyed

I've sorta realised in the last couple of days that I'm actually a horrible and unlikebale person, I'm insanely judgmental and always say the worst things. Sorta explains why I have no friends though.
At least I'll always have my boyfriend but still, I'd like to change those things about myself but its so hard to break out of those habits.

>>7358035
How bad is the fibromyalgia affecting her social experience?

The cure to social insecurity is repeating social interaction until you're used to it. The cure for depression lies in a prescription, or at the very least a thorough conversation.


The healthiest solution might be splitting up for the rest of your lives. It might end with your friend being too depressed to do anything, or it might be a wake up call for her - "If you don't take the initiative you will stay alone".

>>7358048
Thank you so much. I'm trying so hard not to be insensitive to her condition even though I know it's taking a toll on me too. It really hurts to even think about all the awful and negative things I want to say to her without considering her feelings too. I'm really sorry you're struggling with fibromyalgia as well

>>7358062
She was bedridden for 7 years (?) and was finally able to leave her house about a year ago. She's in her mid 20s now

I've tried to get her to interact with people on her own, like having her ask the waiter herself when she needs something instead of having me to do it for her, but it's nearly impossible. I don't know how I can cut her out without feeling guilty if she gets worse

Venting about it here helps tremendously. I've been holding it in for so long lol

>be lone lolita
>slowly approaching my local comm
>decides to go the next meet
>the one person I "know" (i've talked to her a few times since she attends a class I go and knows my bf) just posted she was sick and couldnt go
>I panic because I dont want to be with all the other girls smiling awkwardly and trying to not feel left alone because they all know each other and are friends
>mfw I bought a IW jsk a new blouse and tea parties specially to motivate me to go to the meet
>mfw I dont really want to go now that I know this one girl is sick

I dont know what to do I just feel like I want to try and make new friends, but I know they will be in the comfort zone with the others in the meet and I will just be the odd new girl nobody knows.

>>7358070
you sound like a real asshole.

>>7358087
I don't think she's being an asshole, this is taking a toll on her in a different way.
I've had super clingy friends and it does take a huge toll on you, a lot of guilt and anger builds up and you just don't know what to do or what you should feel.

>>7358087
Not op but you don't know what's fybromilgya, right ?

>>7354899
Is this about devoncuppycakes? Shit, I know about that bitch talks mad smack and I am a random person on the other side of the world who didn't even try to learn about him.

>>7358070
7 years of being bedridden is very, very long. Did she know of lolita then?

With that chunk of social experience removed from her life, it's hard not to feel guilty for her. Seemingly small things like asking the waiter herself or ordering something on her own, and commercial, non-personal interactions in general, are probably the best place to start. Those kind of skills are essential for life, even if she lives as a lone wolf.


I've actually been in a similar case like yours. A good friend of mine hasn't seen much social interaction for 3-4 years and has been very awkward in conversations and meetings. Standing behind me, my friend was actually able to join in conversations and bridge with knowledge of various subjects the social gap.
It took my friend about a year to make a limited recovery, but that year was full of all kinds of social outings of normal groups of friends.

So your case is a harder nut to crack than mine, but I promise you that it isn't impossible. The question is, is your friend worth enough for you to sacrifice your time and reputation for her?


You aren't a bad person if you decide to give up on her. Your time is just as important as her time, if not more.


>>7358084
Going to meets with people I don't know usually ended in me storming away because the most I got was politeness, fake or not.
It's really hard to join a circle of friends without somebody to chain you and them together, though if you manage to enrich a conversation with new ideas or interesting approaches people might remember you and actually invite you to the next meet.

If you can't gather enough courage, stick to the "ghost in the background" approach. That way bailing out in the middle won't result in as much damage.

When I decide not to go to meets for such reasons, I always regret not trying, so I suggest you to go and be confident in yourself.

>>7358092
I know what fibromyalgia is; I suffer from it too.

>>7358035
I have CFS,JHS and have been told I have Fibromyalgia aswell so I can definitely relate with your friend. The main factor being that you can never know how much energy you'll have on a certain day or how much something with take a toll on you. I can understand your frustration though. The truth is she may get better over time, during this year there were times were I was too weak to cut vegetables a few months later I was able to work full time hours for a three month period although I was fatigued and in pain some days. There seems to be a lot of lolitas and famous lolitas with cfs/Fibromyalgia/m.e. Perhaps you could link her to a blog of one of those lolitas. With making friends I guess it's just a matter of trying/more experience. It sounds like you do really care about her but it's hard being her friend. Explaining to the comm might be a good idea also.

>>7358092
>>7358103
>>7358105
Isn't fibromialgiya a rare disease ?

>>7358106

Everyone on /cgl/ seems to have fibro.

>>7358106
Hmm I would call it undiagnosed/misdiagnosed rather than rare apparently 6 million people in the U.S. have Fibromyalgia. Many doctors either don't know about it or don't believe it.

>>7358111
That's because everyone on /cgl/ is rosaire.

>>7358114
And peachie.

>>7358113
This. I had to go trought 3 docs for them to finally diagnosize me with fibro. Before that, they were just saying that it was simple stress or somatization, I've even been tested for STDs.
I don't understand how as a doctor you can 'not believe' in a disease.

My dislike of my comm is growing.

> comm has always been a little shitty
> suddenly everyone is improving their attitudes and outfits
> gain a lot of hope for the future
> out of nowhere we get a newbie explosion
> weebs, furries, general speshul snowflakes coming out of the woodwork
> pulling entire comm down
> embarrassed to be in public with them
> try to help where I can but it's killing me
> inexperienced lolitas trying to give advice
> giant clusterfuck brewing
> soon we'll be all over btb and /cgl, I can just feel it

>>7358165
Branch off with the older crowd, let the noobs fall on their own

I turned down a younger girl who was crushing on me because we live far away, there's a noticeable age difference, and I don't think it would have had any chance of working out.

Confession is that while I know logically I did the right thing and made the mature choice I can live with, I still kind of wish we'd done a few dates, had some fun, and then broken up like normal.

I don't want to start a relationship that I know has no chance at this point and more or less harpoon a friendship over it, but I do find her to be a fun and attractive friend. It feels like I'd be taking advantage of her crush and the fact that she looked up to me when she was a bit younger if I tried anything, so I'm taking the high road and looking enviously at the fun what could have been.

>>7357943

I mean, it's kinda messed up. But, at the same time it's messed up for him to cry rape afterwards if he didn't even say anything against it.

>>7358165
Private meets? What comm is this?

>>7358103
You sound like an asshole

>>7355025
>always being called "madam" in stores
lel

But srsly, I'D LOVE having a boyfriend like you, I'd spoil you and call you a qt everyday. I'd even help you became e-famous too if you want it too much.

>>7358035
These complaints you list aren't fibro-related, they are her fussing at you out of her frustration with it.
Of course I'm sure she's struggling with it and it must be a bitch, but you are perfectly reasonable to either set limits or cut her loose if she has this behavior. Having fibro doesn't excuse you from exercising decent social skills in your social group.
Can you have an honest heart-to-heart with her about it? That would be my only viable suggestion before just gently cutting her loose.

>>7355245
That man you had your way with is no man at all.
He should have been grateful for the opportunity get some action and fucked you like a champion.
Instead he just lay there did nothing and started trying like the little faggot he is.
Fuck him. He is a discredit to the male sex.

>>7358263
you're a good person anon. :)

>>7358070
That's tough anon, but the reason you should talk to her is the same exact reason you want to stop being her friend. She needs to learn some social education. She needs to learn that everyone has boundaries. Even if it's getting to a level of understand so small as "Anon, would you like to leave? I would because of xyz but I know it's your decision too", she needs to learn empathy and perspective.

It sounds like you care about her a lot. Try talking to her. Send her a letter, or call, or say you want to talk to her in person. Explain how you feel, without accusing her. (Try to avoid Yous and more When this happens I feel like ____)

Just because anyone has an illness does not mean you should have to suffer for them. If she does not understand after explaining it a few different ways, and does not slowly stop doing what hurts you over time, you have no obligation to her and can stop being her friend. But if you care about her, you should at least explain to her what she is doing. She may actually really appreciate learning because she may have no freaking clue that she is hurting you. The fact that she did not go to school or be around people her own age for 7 years is really crippling to her social learning and getting some of that now may be really helpful for her.

Her behavior, while not your problem, isn't entirely her fault right now because it seems she honestly doesn't know any better. But try teaching her and see how she takes it. If she is a permanent bitch about it, you can wash your hands of the whole thing. But I imagine she wouldn't want to be like that, and instead will make the effort to take steps in the right direction.

>>7358369

>>7358369

I rarely get myself involved in drama and try my best to be a mediator or offer good advice to my friends in the cosplay community, but I secretly really love hearing gossip about everyone and watching different friend circles implode and people freak out when their cosplay plans or convention details fall through. Being a spectator isn't so bad, right?

>>7358470
i'm well-known in my comm as not being a drama instigator and not caring too much but i like to make secrets on btb and watch the attention whores get super pissy if anyone dares criticize them. all the gossip in my comm is hilarious too.

I wear mens dress shirts, polos, and even tshirts with detachable collars with lolita.
Lolita blouses are just too uncomfortable and don't want to drench them in sweat ;;

Everyone calls people from my country "closed off" and "asocial", because we tend to hang out within the same circle of friends for most of our lives and don't talk much or share our opinions.
Well, last month I visited the States with my brother (he is engaged to an American girl) and saw some internet friends there, and I expected comm dramu but the four childhood friends doing lolita that I know have ALL been slinging shit on each other and then acting like besties. They even tried to get me to do it, and said stuff like "Jane Doe looks way too ita, don't you think so?" and when I didn't agree they try taking back what they said.

Worse thing is that everyone I met kept projecting their fears and wishes onto me and my life, I hate that shit. When I said my boyfriend is home studying, they would say shit like "oh he's fucking someone else alright", and shit like that. They all act as if a normal, drama and backstabbing-free life is fucking impossible, what the fuck is wrong with you people. It's like everyone always assumes the worst and always makes themselves out to be a victim of some odd "troubled life" that they never had.

Lastly, they all tried to do some weird lesbian shit with me and 'experiment' because I said I'd never kissed a girl. I don't fucking want to kiss a girl, leave me alone, I'm a straight woman in a relationship.

All I saw from being "outgoing" and "expressing your opinions" is that it turns you into immature teenagers.
I've also been to Texas, and people there are super nice (especially middle-aged ladies, how adorable) and I really wanna like them but after my experience further up north I'm unsure if they're just pretending.

I felt like I've walked into a living /cgl/

I can't stand that everyone and their mother is starting their own indie lolita brand. A new member of my local comm was advertising her newest lolita dress: a spanish lolita dress for only ?135. Spanish lolita really?! those red/black spanish dance dresses, why.
And earlier this week another girl was trying to get inspiration for her lolita sleepwear shop. just because you can sew doesn't mean you should open a shop.

>>7357150
same
fucking same

>>7358726
It actually makes me facepalm so much when people learn to sew a straight line, think they can start their own "brand" then post to sew_loli asking for the most basic of tutorials, or even better, someone to explain the most basic of tutorials. If you can't work out a half-elastic skirt, can't insert a zipper and have never heard the word "interfacing" you shouldn't be selling shit.

>>7358726
You should look at her site to see the other dress she made.

>>7358747
This so much! And the designs are something so ugly you don't even get to how bad the construction is. I lose all my respect for these kind of people, get a real job and don't try to rip us off.
This is like the next level to newbies starting lolita blogs full of 'advice'.

>>7358757
I'm going to check it out right now, I Didn't brother earlier today.
And somehow the casual way she shared it on the fb page annoyed me even more. It's an comm not your personal etsy shop.

>>7358770
Yeah. The flipside is lolitas who get pretentious and uppity about "brand quality" so whinge about construction issues that don't matter (loose threads, seriously) while ignoring major ones such as that the entire pattern of a dress is fucked up or that Baby doesn't even bother lining half their bodices.

>>7358775
yes I agree with you on that one. I mostly own older pieces and handmade. And my own handmade pieces aren't close to perfect, but I only sew for myself so I don't care if it has little flaws. When I bought a new baby dress I was really suprised that only part was linned, glad to hear I'm not the only one bothered by that.
But I do believe that if you have an indie brand, you have to make clothes perfect and better then brand. You have to make a name for yourself, a thing the big brands already have. And I think all those girls don't realise that. They believe that if they just put those dresses online, everyone will just want to buy them. because you know, we spend 250 dollar on brand dresses anyways.

>>7358757
Fingerless gloves...

>>7358265
Are you fucking autistic?

>>7358792
They match the red shiny wedding dress perfectly

i have anxiety among other things, no real friends, and hate leaving my home so i collect pretty lolita dresses

>>7354749
i'm /fa/ 98% of the time but i go full /cgl/ mode every once in a while, mostly to disney world (i live in orlando so i go there a lot)

disney world is the only place i feel comfortable in my pink frills anymore ;_; everywhere else it's black drainpipes and scarves

>>7358726
Do you mean the sevillana dress?

>>7358809
wait, drainpipes?

>>7358825
yes, I didn't know the name for those kind of dresses.

I'm really excited to see that NYC Lolita seagulls have made their own meet to avoid crazy drama. The last lolita meet in NYC I went to was in 2009 and I would definitely love to meet some new potential friends. Just have to get over my anxiety of spilling my spaghetti.

>>7358829
drainpipe trousers anon

>>7358829
slim-fit/skinny pants. sorry, should have clarified. lol

>>7358794

Negative.

Just tired of how much bitching about random stuff on /cgl/ could be solved by simply saying something.

Saying "no" is the smallest possible effort. If you don't even do that, you can't bitch.

>>7358886
Kudos for possibly puzzling a young one, this and the photo made me laugh!

>>7357963
>>7357962
>>7357954
I talked to him today. I actually didn't message him or anything, he texted me out of the blue and asked if he could visit. When he got there he actually apologized to *me* for what I did and I broke down and lost my shit. Then he started crying and I hugged him and we had a big cry duet.

Sorry for being the worst seagull to ever shame the board. I offered to pay for therapy for him but he declined, I just told him it was an open offer and I wouldn't pressure him about it. Going to go ahead and schedule a shrink for myself on monday too.

>chugging tequila straight from the bottle

Even though everyone here probably hates my guts, thanks for talking with me about it /cgl/. It's pathetic that this is what it took, but you guys really opened my eyes to severity of the whole thing. Thanks.

I'm nervous about going to a lolita meet tomorrow.
It's because I'm afraid I won't look like how I look in the recent pics I took. That's because I was excessively generous with the Photoshop. It's the same coord too.

Now I wouldn't say my photoshopping is exactly Kooter-tier. It's more like small factors and changes that make my personal photos so different than meetup candids.
For example being indoor versus outside facing wind elements and sweat.
Being able to check myself in the mirror really quick to check for flaws or awkward expressions.
Or being able to take a bajillion photos of myself before deciding on a set I like as opposed to someone just taking one of me and praying it looks okay.
(con't)

>>7359015
As for the actual photoshopping, this is where it gets shameful. I aim for subtlety (or things I can change that people won't necessarily notice much difference in), but I think the result just makes people put me on an even higher pedestal for when we meet irl.
>round face
I push in my lower cheeks to give me more of a heart shaped face. I have such fat cheeks.
>acne
I wear a layer of foundation everyday. Literally. In reality I look like a constant cakeface and it's so obvious that it doesn't blend well with my skin, but for some reason in pictures my makeup blends perfect. I get that smooth, even complexion you see in magazines. Yet I still manage to get a few red dots seeping through my mask. I touch up those and lighten my skin.
>ankles
I noticed that no matter how fat you are, if people can see you have thin ankles versus your calves they're a lot less inclined to think you're as heavy as you say. So I push in my ankles to make them look smaller.
I do the same for my wrists and arms.
And I usually give my waist a push in too.
>the photo itself
I stretch and push in the dimensions to make myself seem taller and thinner.


However there's just nothing anyone can say that can make me feel worse about it than I already do. I like the image I created of myself more than I like the real me....and what hurts most is that so does everyone else.

>>7356516
good for you, bronon. the internet needs more guys willing to try and understand

>>7357475
it's okay anon
i wanna rub frilly fannies with my lolita bff too

>>7359019
I've always wondered about this. Has there been any online drama about any Lolitas that shoop too much then actually look different IRL? Not sure.
But famous cosplayers and movie actresses are shopped for photos and they don't usually get mountains of shit for it, just occasionally.
Might you just be a little preoccupied with yourself and your image at this point, therefore the situation magnified?

>>7358050
me 2 anon

>>7358999
if he's a brolita, he probably saw this thread

/cgl/ bringing together a rapist and their victim: a new low

I'm somewhat worried about being myself around my local comm. They're honestly the only female friends I have, and they all love two hours or more away so I never see them. I smoke weed and cigarettes and, despite being a sweet Lolita, am not as girly as I try to portray around them. Just not used to being around females, and it makes me anxious at meet ups sometimes.

>>7358999
Still waiting for you to turn yourself in to the police.

>>7358999

If you were a guy more people would be getting on your case. You need help. Stop traumatising the poor guy and get yourself some professional aid. At least you're self aware, so I won't lay on the namecalling.

>>7358559

Sounds like my mom. Sounds like most Americans. I had to deal with my own mother saying my then boyfriend was dating/fucking/proposing to another girl back in his home country. She'd send me articles how guys were more prone to cheating. I never really doubted his loyalty, but god did it get under my fucking skin.

Then my parents threatened to disown me anyways.

Fuck, writing this makes me fucking angry.

>>7359098
i smoke at meetups. no one minds if i excuse myself and go outside to do it. my other lolita friend who smokes usually comes with me. just spray a light body spray afterward and wash your hands so you don't smell like smoke and interrupt the delicacy

>>7359145
i smoke cigarettes, i should say. and cigarillos. don't smoke weed in public lmao

I wish I could be friends with other straight girls. I'm not sure why I can't. I'm nice and sweet, try to make conversation and give compliments. It seems like they just ignore me and think I'm snooty. I'm really not sure what I did. Tomorrow I'm wearing lolita to a picnic with my two male friends who wear aristocrat, and then we're going to a lighthouse museum. There's less drama in a group of three friends anyhow, I guess.. Still wish I had a straight girl I could bond with. Only nonstraight girls and guys talk to me, which I'm fine with. Just want someone to relate to, you know?

>>7359144
Not to mention that I've been dating this guy for several years and I'd know if he were that type. I even think he'll propose soon, he did hint at it when we spoke about Valentine's.

I just hated people telling me what I'm feeling, what I meant to say and what I want to do, putting words in my mouth. It's so fucking annoying and catty.
I pray my future sister-in-law won't be like that, she seems great, if a bit ignorant about the world outside of the US, and her parents are swell.

>>7358559
Which country?

>>7359196
Estonia.

>>7359203
I don't presume to know very much but I know that more people are learning about Estonia by way of artists like Kerli. I've heard her speak of life there and strong traditions and bonds and growing up with nothing but those to rely on. I thought it was touching and inspiring. I hope you can find some people who aren't ignorant to the recent difficult history and traditions of your country. They are out there, just maybe not as common.

>>7358165
This sounds like an Aus comm

>>7358413
It's actually comforting to hear this. Doing the right thing and still feeling guilty about the temptation of what could have been feels a little more validated when other people see it as a good overall action.

What Sachie doesn't know....

>>7355095
Hey anon i have the same thing. After having been into western goth and gothic lolita for far too many years than i want to admit i started getting a terrible longing to dress in something pastel or at least more colourful. My trick was getting stuff that was lighter but not too sweet to start off with? No prints ect... I picked up a lovely bright red AP Aline number a while ago and while it was still kinda cutesy it replaced the baby pastels with a bit of a retro vibe that wasn't too overpowering when toned down.

>>7356114
> dem mediterranean feels

>>7357829
Not same anon but damn it i wish it was...

There is a girl in my comm who is fucking god awful at just about everything, coord, hair, make-up.
I have never given her any decent advice or crit and tell her she looks great when she posts on facebook because I want her to carry on being horrendous so that I may continue to laugh at her behind her back.

I'm becoming a brand whore. I've sold nearly all my Bodyline shit except for a skirt that's pretty good (but skirts are so casual anyway), and I'm ok with Taobao for accessories, blouses and thing that need to get washed often, but main piece has to be brand. I don't care about what other people are wearing, but I wear nearly only non-printed dress, and for non-printed items, quality is a must, so I splurge on brand.
Lolita made me really picky and observant too, I'm nitpicking on outfits I used to like, I totally notice people, even normalfag, wearing wigs and contact lens each time now, and I've been so picky with color balance and shades, detailling, accessories and stuff lately. Irarely go to meets, but I wear loli fairly often, I do it simple but perfectly neat. Yet when I see other lolitas they just throw random color matching things into their outfits, it make me cringe in the inside, but I'd come off so autistic if I ever tell anyone. And at the end of the day, they wear what they want to.

TL;DR Imma brandwhore for myself, and autisticly picky about outfits

>>7359747
Someone critiqued a coord on the last top tier thread and people flipped their shit. Better to be this way, maybe.

I fucking hate tea and I feel like an inferior loli sometimes. I've tried multiple kinds and I just can't do it, it's all so bitter and disgusting no matter how much shit you add to it.

Can a girl just get some non teaparty meetups please

>>7359790
Drink coffee, juice or chocolate then.

>>7359790
I've always offered something besides tea at teaparties, and I'm a tea lover. I'm really glad if non-tea drinkers suggest what they do like to me beforehand so I can provide it or something similar.

>>7359790
i hate tea too, when i used to drink i would add so much milk and sugar to cover the taste that there might as well not be tea in the cup

so now i just drink a cup of warm milk with one spoon of sugar. nobody cares really, just drink something alternative to tea.

A group of friends of mine put together a Disney princess cosplay group and when they realised they needed more spots filled they made a fb event about it to get interest and invited me. I've only ever cosplayed once or twice and as you'd rightly assume the major ones are already taken by the original group ( snow white, ariel and the relevant character Belle. ) I wasn't too irked that they didn't bother asking me in the first place but I just....seeing a group of friends doing them and suddenly I just want to do this childhood cosplay so badly. I'm just gonna do it, I'm gonna dress as Belle in my actual handmade costume because I can actually sew and be accurate and totally bump the other chick from the group. She has a man face, doesn't wash her hair and has a kid while I'm skinnier, cuter and I know I can rock it better. I feel worse because they're all cosplay groupies so whichever one of us is dressed better is the one they're going to want in their group shots - it's just how they'll roll.

Don't get me wrong they'll want to still hang out with us both during the con but photoshoot wise they'll only want 1 to be in the group.

>>7358559
Texan here. nope, they're not pretending. It's just southern hospitality. The social expectations are a little higher here. (Although i'm a lone lolita so I can't speak for any comms.) my grandmother brings sodas and snacks to the guys who touch up her lawn every week and brings good food to nursing homes on sundays, and neighborhood
kids help.
Also, my math teacher once laughingly said "I don't feel like I've been to New York until somebody's rude to me"

>>7359987
Aww, that's so nice! I'm glad to have been there then, I've been hearing stories about people being religious nuts and it being "hell for atheists" but I guess they were just edgy leddit teens.

>>7358982
>I've never been in a traumatic situation.

>>7360116
Oh, no, we have those in the south for sure, and when you happen to stumble into them, it will ruin your day, but in my experience it isn't as bad as everyone makes it out to be.

I have a friend who is so, so amazingly desperate to be an e-famous cosplayer. She already has people sucking up to her saying things like she's a celebrity of our area (there are several more well-known cosplayers from around here who do better work) and is starting to choose characters based on their popularity. The thing is, she's actually a fake bitch and possibly the biggest dramawhore I've ever met. I'm afraid to say too much lest it get back to her, but my confession is that while I'm going to be friendly to her face and won't fuel anything, I really, really hope she gets trashed here if she gains a little more popularity. I know she'd be crushed, and I think she deserves it for the way she acts like her shit doesn't stink and how she treats her friends.

>>7360130
haha, i feel like a bitch, but i feel the same way about someone in my comm. some people just have a lot of potential for delicious drama, you're just waiting for the train wreck to happen.

>>7358806
Hi, anon.

I have terrible anxiety, as well. It started in high school and got to the point where I had to be home-schooled. Since I became home-schooled all my friends really moved on with their lives, I used to have a pretty big group of friends and now it's been reduced down to about two or three that I only see when I decide to go visit them at college. I'm paranoid about people, so I keep my blinds closed, and only leave the house when I know my neighbors are at work.

I've found that it's easier for me to go do things on my own when I know other people aren't around. I take long walks every other day before noon. I try to push myself to go to places where people are (bookstores, the library, the mall) on my walks, and reward myself when I do (with a new accessory, seeing a movie, or some sweets, etc.).

I'm not sure if this could help you, but maybe at least knowing you're not alone might be nice.

>>7354295
>I weeb out in private like whoa.

Me too, anon.

Re-reading my favorite manga, sitting in the living room, I'm just weebing the fuck out like actually squeeing and shit, and my mom just looks at me and asks what the fuck is wrong with me.

Watching my favorite anime, big shit-eating-grin plastered on my face the whole time.

Then I message my friend who I weeb out with all the time and we weeb together in secret, discussing our ships, discussing the dreep meanings behind our manga, etc.

>>7360130
What area?

>>7354981
>>7355021
>>7355269

"In the 18th century, the most ancient known Indo-European languages were those of the ancient Indo-Iranians. The word Aryan was therefore adopted to refer not only to the Indo-Iranian peoples, but also to native Indo-European speakers as a whole, including the Romans, Greeks, and the Germans. It was soon recognised that Balts, Celts, and Slavs also belonged to the same group. It was argued that all of these languages originated from a common root—now known as Proto-Indo-European—spoken by an ancient people who were thought of as ancestors of the European, Iranian, and Indo-Aryan peoples. The ethnic group composed of the Proto-Indo-Europeans and their modern descendants was termed the 'Aryans'."

TL;DR, 'Aryan' does not mean what Hitler thought it meant.

>>7358999
Good that you guys got through this, I hope it all works out.

>>7360154

except Hitler knew what it meant and twisted to term to fit his needs like everything else hitler did

I try everyday to look like some japanese celebrity I like. I got into J-fashion and started browsing /cgl/ just for that and I have been doing this for around 4 years now.
I think I have reached the dangerous zone since if I look at myself in the mirror and I don't see any resemblance between us I get depressed.
Will give more details if anyone is interested

>>7360681
Which celebrity? And what's your ethnicity?

>>7360154
Which is why I asked the idiot who used "nonaryan"

>>7360683
Kamijo in Lareine times
Eurofag

>>7361087
Oh shit
Did you also cosplay Loki at some point?
I think I know you. If not, I know someone who also dresses like Kamijo.

>>7361118
No. Now I'm not sure if should feel glad or afraid there is more people like me

>>7361148
Well, the person in question is a massive weeb, addresses herself as 'he' (despite being female and never claiming to be transsexual), worships Loki and Kamijo and generally spams Facebook.
Take that as you will.

>>7360142
Oklahoma.

>>7360140
I'm the same...but I feel so happy...We feel so happy and it's like a secret life so it's kinda exciting

>>7361254
And it's not like if we were making trouble and annoying other people. We have limits.

>>7361190
I see, then I'm glad I'm not like that.
Somehow I knew something wasn't totally right when you mentioned Loki.

>>7359151
I used to have that problem. I used to find straight girls to be incredibly difficult to talk to.

>>7357318
People always commend others for self-posts on the ita thread, so it's okay bby.

>>7358559
You just had a bad experience. Stop projecting that experience onto a large group of people.

>>7361561
Do you think I should post it then?

>>7361561
She said 'some' at least a few times, and then added a nice experience to counter the bad one. I don't think you know what "projecting" means, sweetie.

I fucking love hime gyaru and other elegant/frilly fashions, but for some reason I'm not able to enjoy it as much as I could because in the back of my head I'm always thinking "What happens when I get too old for this?". It doesn't make a whole lot of sense, I'm basically the ideal age for the style, but the thing is I know I'm not going to want to stop wearing it when I get older. With fashion being such a big part of my life, I'm worried that once I reach a certain age I'll never enjoy getting dressed up again,because how can you enjoy putting together outfits and wearing them when you're always thinking of how you wish you could be wearing something else? It's such a stupid thing for someone my age to be worrying about, but I just can't make these concerns go away.

>>7359019
Thats pretty bad i feel for ya but i guess everyone has their problems.

Maybe stopping with the whole photo shopping stuff and learning to appreciate yourself (easier said than done i know) would help.

>>7358142
>I don't understand how as a doctor you can 'not believe' in a disease.
I thought about this the other day too, anon. Specifically in relation to my 14 food allergies.

Think of it this way: science (in this case, the applied science of medicine) is the art of being a skeptic. If you believed everything you heard at face value in that field, you would still hear of folks with "curses", demons, and witchcraft as the source of illnesses. Plenty of doctors in my experience have become hardened by their experiences and often don't see what the symptoms point to, or don't want believe purely what you describe to them.

My confession:
When I first saw OTT sweet with a split wig and 2 colors of tea parties I did think it would make the most adorable pretty little circus clown costume. I didn't think it in a bad or mean way, I just saw the idea of her having little pink and mint poodles doing tricks. Idk it was such an insult till later. Secrets this week reminded me. Oh well.

>>7361087
God god god I think I know you ! Are you a girl who also wear pirate lolita ?!

>>7362324
No. But I would love to.

>>7361685
Yes!

>>7361712
Imo, she seemed pretty harsh in the entire comment, and then her counter example of good people was kind of negated when she made a comment about the north... It came off like "ooh, TX was good! I guess the north is just ew..."

Either way, I just hope she didn't let those "some" people experiences effect her entire view of groups of people... That's all I mean, sorry.

>>7361712
>sweetie

bye

>>7362818
Glad I wasn't the only one thinking that was shitty and condescending. Ew.

I always think Im the best dressed of my comm when I see the pictures after the meets.
They all worship bodyline (the ugly ones, I do have some classic bodyline too, but I know about the sad quality) and the few that wear brand seems like they choose the shitty looking ones or just coord them bad.

>mfw they think they know so much about lolita fashion
>the girl who thinks is in charge is a huge bitch and feels entitled to treat everyone bad like the waiters and the restaurant or the person from parking lots with the excuse that "because we dress different they need to give us the same treatment and respect"
>mfw nobody was treating her bad, she just like demeaning people in her frills and makes me feel so embarrassed about it, lolitas arent all bitches...
>mfw I felt so uncomfortable to be seen with a person like her
>they laugh about other girls coords meanwhile I could see the glue in their handmade headbows and the cheap rings and necklaces
>mfw I feel flawless even though I know I can do much better

I always get home feeling a bit empty inside, not being able to help them because they wont listen to what I say because Im new to the comm (used to be lone lolita) and also because I have no mentor to teach me more about the fashion, it depresses me because I was looking forward to a "senpai-chan" in this comm.


I love wearing lolita but they are holding me back... and shaming the fashion.

I just closed my etsy account, with orders still not complete. They've been there for more than six months now, but I had some health issues and some mental health problems that are still affecting me. Just going on to etsy causes me anxiety, so I just... deleted my account.

I'm a terrible person, but I can't bring myself to deal with it without making myself sick.

>>7359128
unless her friend presses charges nothing will happen
calm your justice boner, anon. nothing's going to happen, for better or for worse.

>>7359747
i feel you anon, i feel like i'm becoming an autist about coords sometimes but usually i only find myself nitpicking just ok coords, but ignore the good ones even if they could be better. the irony is i know my coords aren't super great or amazing either. i feel super rude.

>>7365421
it's ok anon, refund your buyers or let them know you're on hiatus and take some time for yourself. anxiety sucks. feel better.

>>7365132
>I love wearing lolita but they are holding me back...

Don't let them, Thats the worst you can do to yourself.
If you see something wrong in their cords, accessories, or dresses tell them, but in a friendly way, show them you want help them to improve.
If they get angry, then it is not worth wasting your time with them. Some people are like that.

The same applies to their attitudes.

> local comm has a Queen Bee and people suck up to her
> said girl can't return a compliment and has an obnoxious personality at times
> girl likes to boast about her wardrobe
> possible drama-monger
> dresses well most of the time but her outfits are getting stale
> kinda pretty, a lot of good makeup helps
> be me, get jelly of the attention she gets
> I play down compliments, keep my large wardrobe a secret, help the comm where I can (this girl doesn't do a thing unless it benefits her)
> some days I feel really good about myself, other days not so much
> vow to improve myself this year (hair, makeup, outfits, etc)
> feel really conflicted about my motivations behind it
> on one hand I'm doing this for myself because I know I can be better, it's also giving me confidence and improving my self image
> on the other hand I sometimes feel like I'm only doing it so I can 'show-up' this girl (I mainly feel like this on days when I hit a low and dwell on my self hatred)