Lolita communities

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Lolita communities Anonymous Thu Feb 12 00:58:13 2015 No.8114636 [Reply] [Original]

do you like your comm? do you hate your comm? what's the latest drama, any plans for valentines day, or just discussion on communities in general

international lolita communities doc: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0Anw4aY5HpSLMdFU2UjZjZ0t2Z0I3RXZtemhkSWlMamc

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 12 00:59:30 2015 No.8114640 i would like to ask very specifically on what's switzerland and germany like? in which cities of these two countries is the lolita community most saturated? i may be visiting these two places alone in july

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 01:06:00 2015 No.8114647

>>8114636
I love my comm, I haven't really been in it long enough to have issues though.
A Valentine's meet is happening here, although tickets were originally over $50, and no one bought them, so plans were changed a bit.
I personally think $50 is a bit steep for a ticket imho
But I've made friends in my comm

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 01:06:31 2015 No.8114649

I feel my comm is very disjointed and difficult to get to know. Partially because of flakes, partially because some of them seem kind of awkward (like I've had to keep initiating new topics or else there would be silence at my last small meet)

Granted that's how it seems people are in this city anyways. "Unless I know you I don't want to get to know you" sort of thing.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 01:43:29 2015 No.8114705

>>8114636
My comm is having a cute tea meetup after Valentine's Day! I have a decent amount of friends in my comm that it's not super awkward when new people join.

>>8114649
Look up some getting to know you games! Like you could do a fishbowl with cutout pastel hearts with questions written on them for a cute activity.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 02:23:35 2015 No.8114780

I wish I had actual friends in my comm. I talk with the girls at meets a bit (Im quite shy), chat with some on FB every month or so, but I feel like noone would be interested in being FRIENDS outside of meet ups. I live far away but I go into a city within 15 minutes of where most of them live multiple times a week. I know one would like to hang out sometime but we haven't actually made a plan, she just said she was really busy at the moment - like months ago. So should I contact her again about it?
Help my socially awkward self to make some friends!

My comm is nice but not super active, we have meets every month or so. No drama, but nothing really interesting to start drama over either.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 12 13:35:54 2015 No.8115390 is it just my comm?? everyone is an SJW tumblrina real fucking ass retard tier. feminism everywhere.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 13:40:32 2015 No.8115397

I love the people in my comm, but my god half of them are just flaky as fuck. I consider myself pretty scatterbrained, but I just don't understand how people think it's totally acceptable to routinely RSVP as "attending" to something, and then post on the page saying "Sorry guys I actually can't make it!" 10 minutes before the event starts. It's super rude, and I think it probably puts newbies off from attending meets because they're so often left waiting around for people.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 14:04:53 2015 No.8115435

I used to really want to be close to my comm but after going to a bunch of meets, I am done. Nothing against the girls, it is just awkward and we have very little in common other than lolita. It feels more like we are all colleagues as opposed to friends. Plus a lot of them are younger and into anime or put themselves into huge debt and then cry about it.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 14:33:57 2015 No.8115473

>>8114640
>2nding
Ill be visiting at least once a year for 2-3 years before moving to Germany. Should i wait until my german is near fluent or are people patient and welcoming enough to make english conversation. (preferably eastern like the borders of Belgium and Netherlands)

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 14:49:11 2015 No.8115495

Our comm is very large, there are different circles and it is difficult to get in. You need to attend meet ups to make some social contact and get invited to various fb groups to be able to attend more meet ups (as very few of them are public, most are invitation only or you need to be in the fb group- which usually is private too). It keeps the creeps out though.

I have one closer friend in my comm and a few girls I like/talk to at meet ups but I'm not really friends with. Honestly, I mostly enjoy meet ups for Lolita small talk and gossip that I cannot make with anyone else expept my only Lolita friend that I see outside of meets. Not to mention the ability to wear more OTT stuff, put on all the burando and recieve some attention othe than the normalfag reaction to the clothes. Whenever I see people who are dressed badly I also tend to feel better about myself.

So I admit it, I'm a bad person because gossip and validation are the main reasons i go to meet ups with my comm. Anyone else or am I the only one...?

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 12 18:24:47 2015 No.8115863 I'm curious if other comms allow other people wearing other J fashions (like mori, decora, harajuku) to attend meet-ups? We have a few girls in our comm that are wanting to do that but I'm worried it might confuse people.

Anonymous Thu Feb 12 18:48:49 2015 No.8115890

My local comm is not very active, but I hang out with lolita friends outside of the comm (most of them aren't in the local comm) for casual shopping, lunch and what not. I wish my comm is more active in terms of meets, I love the other girls in my comm.
Recently a girl have been puttingg up sales posts with badly punctuated one sentence WTB/DS with terrible photos and it is annoying the hell out of me. I want to comment and tell her to get her shit together, follow the format and try to congregate her WTBs into one big post, but I don't want to come across as being mean as she is very new and seems slow. Same girl tried to sell an Infanta JSK for $100 + shipping.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 12 19:01:53 2015 No.8115905 >>8115863 My comm allows other J-fashion at casual meetups and swap meets, but not at ticketed events or fancy meetups. No one has ever complained about that policy, and it seems to work pretty well.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 12 23:52:35 2015 No.8116313 I love my comm. everyone is cool as fuck, friendly, and really kind.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 00:14:55 2015 No.8116355

>>8115863

My comm doesn't allow "jfashion", but we have some history for not allowing it. We also don't allow photographers and "lolita fans" to come along. The meetups are strictly only for people dressed in lolita or boystyle.

So far as I can figure there's been a few instances in the past where some weeb neckbeards from the campus some of our members go to try to join meetups so that they can fish for lolita gfs. "Jfashion" is one of those really wide categories where a guy can put together some mismatched junk and call himself a FRUiTS, or even show up entirely in cosplay. It sounds mean, but putting a blanket ban on everything non lolita is easier than dealing with why you'd allow some jfashion in but not others.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 00:35:25 2015 No.8116403

I've always heard good things about the colorado comm.
I've been to a few meets and everyone is nice, but I just can't fit in. Everyone is already good friends it seems.
also the facebook group is closed, but with 160 members.
Is that normal for comm groups?
I think it should be purged.

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 00:42:09 2015 No.8116413 Are there any comms in the Philippines?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 03:28:00 2015 No.8116622 >>8114640 Help?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 03:31:07 2015 No.8116624 What's up with the Australian comm?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 03:44:32 2015 No.8116630 >>8116624 In what way? Bits of drama here and there, but business as usual.

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 03:54:15 2015 No.8116638 >>8116630 I just always love Australian drama since I moved out of the country.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 04:30:50 2015 No.8116661

>>8116355
>We also don't allow photographers and "lolita fans" to come along. The meetups are strictly only for people dressed in lolita or boystyle.

So jealous... Especially of the photographer part. There's nothing worse than these hobby photographers looking for any opportunity not only to take pictures but also to promote themselves and say how totes awesome they are even though the only thing that's good is their expensive camera and their editing skills are worse than what I could do in five minutes with gimp. Not to mention the drama when one of the middle aged man developed a crush on one of the Lolitas. Ugh.
So much for the ones in my comm. But one of the girls is friends with them so we cannot say anything.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 05:11:30 2015 No.8116700
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>>8116624

A new fat ita in Melbourne is likely to be the next lolcow. Went to a masquerade picnic with her dog named Lolita.

Tillyander moved down here as well, but has been quiet so far.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 05:42:34 2015 No.8116748

>>8115473
I guess it really depends on the comm you go to. In my comm, quite a few speack english fluently, but others are still pretty young or only speak really bad english for other reasons. I am sure there will be at least a few girls who are comfortable switching to english for you. Everybody might be a bit shy at first (I know I am everytime I have to talk english), but if you attend meets regularly I am sure it'll get better everytime.

I am from bavaria, but I hope you'll find a ncie comm in your area...I think the comms there are pretty big!

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 06:35:01 2015 No.8116795 >>8116403 >thinking 160 is a lot

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 06:41:16 2015 No.8116799

>>8116795
Colorado isn't that big of a state population wise compared to say California or even Georgia so 160 is actually a fair amount of people. These 160 may not all be active though because I'd say most comms with that many people usually only have 20-50 people who are fairly active.

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 07:08:18 2015 No.8116818 >>8115890 Melbourne comm?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 07:12:25 2015 No.8116820 >>8116700 Wow and here I thought that the Melbourne community was nice. Guess you changed once all the longest standing members left.

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 08:23:27 2015 No.8116861 >>8116820 oh suck it up princess >b-but I thought lolitas were lovely!1!!

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 08:29:32 2015 No.8116866 Does anyone know anything about the Italian comm? Specifically around Milan and places nearby. I'm here for the semester and I'm thinking about joining. My Italian's okay but I get nervous sometimes and make stupid mistakes, how friendly is everyone?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 09:31:01 2015 No.8116927 >>8116820 melbourne is just better at keeping their drama and bitching contained than other comms. then you have others who are just itching to post to /cgl/ >>8116861 >being this edgy

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 14:09:33 2015 No.8117267

we used to have meetups several times a month with the whole comm (there's 100+ members) but then some of the lolitas decided to band together and make "private only" events that are only sent out to their friends soo nobody makes public/comm friendly meetups anymore.

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 14:17:25 2015 No.8117275 >>8116661 Mmmm what comm are you in?

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 17:09:24 2015 No.8117605 >>8117275 Eurofag here. I'd rather not reveal where I'm from as the story might be too detailed and comm members are lurking, but if you are in my comm you know that suffering. If not I'm really sad that there are more comms with this problems.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 18:41:33 2015 No.8117737

>>8114636
I like my comm. I get annoyed that so many people flake or that events get moved around a lot, but that's to be expected. Quite a few of them are socially awkward, though. I've noticed that a lot of them will be uber shy or standoffish at first and they have to basically be forced to interact with others.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 18:59:43 2015 No.8117763

>>8116661
We had one of those in my old comm. She would constantly self promote and invite her photog friends into the group without asking. Her thing was making these "lolita" calenders, where she'd get popular girls and these rich bratty itas that no one liked to each do a photo for the month. She was awful at photoshop and would make all the pictures scary and dumb as hell.

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 19:04:00 2015 No.8117772

>>8116661
Yeah have a similar issue in my comm.
Have a lot of "oh my community college coursework requires me to do a portfolio piece so I chose lolita fashion cuz I'm so unique teehee" girls who tag along and just make everyone feel awkward. Girls, you might have an SLR but holding the camera at a tilt and then photoshopping it sepia does not make your photo deep and interesting

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 19:07:29 2015 No.8117779 >>8117763 Do you have pictures of the calendars?

Anonymous Fri Feb 13 19:17:01 2015 No.8117799

>>8117772
>>8117763
Idk I'd take these girls over a middle aged completly talentless "photographer" any day. He's just so trying-too-hard-to-impress-weebs it actually makes me feel a bit sad.
>Oh I'm still young and hip inside and I hang out with the cool edgy kids!!
>I'm totes awesome at photography!!!
While in reality
>annoys the fuck out of everyone and doesn't know when to shut up/leave people alone
>Only thing good about the photos are the quality camera they have been taken with - literally everything else is shit

One example: After he took some pictures he asked me if I wanted to have them edited or anything. When I asked him if he could edit my skin a bit to make it look more flawless (it was the end of the day and my make up wasn't perfect, plus my skin looks like shit with acne/acne scars anyway); he looked really embarrassed and admitted he wasn't very good at editing skin. Like, seriously? This shit can be done with zero skills and even free software like Gimp.
>mfw there are now HD photos of my afwul skin floating around the internet

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 13 19:22:52 2015 No.8117806 >>8116700 haha you got tillyander. you want kate next?

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 14 02:01:17 2015 No.8118556 >>8116748 Thank you. Do you know if most comms are limited to facebook? i know of the Dunkel website too.

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 14 03:40:23 2015 No.8118637 >>8116700 she looks mentally disabled

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 14 10:06:36 2015 No.8118933 >>8117806 Kate who?

Anonymous Sat Feb 14 11:02:44 2015 No.8119072

>>8115390
I love my common. We are somewhat inactive but the complete opposite of this. Mostly because the majority of us are adults with jobs and lives who don't take the fashion super seriously. Of course the negative side of this is I don't have any friends to really talk about the fashion with, which is kind of the reason I joined a comm at all... But I'll gladly take what I got rather than risk having a bunch of assholes who take everything in their lives too seriously.

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 14 12:58:59 2015 No.8119229 >>8114636 I love my comm! They're full of really nice ladies, and there's no drama. There are a few itas in the comm, but they rarely go to meetups.

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 14 16:49:04 2015 No.8119602 >>8118933 known as wraith

Anonymous Sat Feb 14 17:47:28 2015 No.8119686

>>8118556
I think most comms are on facebook, but it's different for every comm. Your best bet might be to check out Dunkelsüß and Animexx and try searching the name of the city + lolita on facebook. Or you just ask on these platforms if anybody knows the comm in the specific town and I am sure somebody will tell you where to find them. Good luck and have fun with the girls!

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 15:51:53 2015 No.8121341 >>8116700 She looks fine, just a very unflattering pose and photo, plus she needs to dress a bit better. Wouldn't say lolcow by any means.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:21:52 2015 No.8121399 >>8114780 If it was months ago, ask her again.

Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:28:21 2015 No.8121420

>>8115863
I'd feel awkward at as proper meet where people were in other jfash, especially since other jfashions are less rules-focused and therefore easier to fuck up. For a casual meet where lolita isn't compulsory it's fine but meets where normalfag clothing isn't allowed shouldn't allow other jfashions IMHO.

I also think jfashion meets, as opposed to lolita meets, put a weebier spin on things. Because you're not together through mutual interest in lolita, or mutual interest in fashion in general, but only Japanese fashion. You might as well just allow Western alternative fashion if you're allowing other jfashion

Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:33:43 2015 No.8121429

>>8116661
I live between two comms. One has a weird self-promoting middle-aged photographer following a lot of meets around, and the mods encourage it because they want "pro" photos from someone with a decent camera. I find it so off-putting that I nearly always go to meets with the other comm instead, even though it's a longer drive away.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:35:52 2015 No.8121438 >>8116799 My comm has over 200 people in the closed Facebook group, but only 12 (20 at a push) regulars and even the largest meets never get more than 20 people.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:39:05 2015 No.8121444 >>8117799 I feel like I may know which comm you mean. Is it a city where there's another street photographer that's got nothing to do with the comm but has much more talent and more popular Facebook than the guy creeping round the comm?

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:52:17 2015 No.8121465 >>8121444 Nah anon, I don't think so. First the comm is for our whole state so no specific city, and also I don't know about any street photographer here too.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 16:57:14 2015 No.8121477 >>8121465 Oh, this whole situation must just be more common than I thought.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 15 17:22:30 2015 No.8121533 >>8116624 I want to know the Sydney drama with Milkyfawn. What the fuck happened there?

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:24:41 2015 No.8122468
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I fucking hate South Texas lolitas in general, I was going to join them for their shitty get together hoping I would be wrong but as soon as I saw them in the distance I knew it was going to be a mistake. I mean who has lolita meat ups at a public museum?

At least I'll save money...

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:34:32 2015 No.8122477 >>8122468 ...HLC, SATX, Corpus orr....?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:41:55 2015 No.8122487 >>8122468 >I mean who has lolita meat ups at a public museum? Fuck you, sometimes that's all there is to do in a town.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:43:04 2015 No.8122491 >>8121533 I'm curious too.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:44:22 2015 No.8122492 >>8122468 What's wrong with museum meets? Art galleries are pretty nice.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:46:16 2015 No.8122497

>>8122477
Way down south, I live in the shit hole called the Rio Grande Valley. I could literally walk over to Mexico if I wanted to. It sucks that most of the lolitas are Mexicans or trailer trash.

>>8122487
That may or may not be true, doesn't mean you have to take do shoots inside a dirty old museum and act like autistic children.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:46:36 2015 No.8122500 >>8122468 Museum meet ups are the shit, are you some uneducated dit that you can't enjoy a bit of culture?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:47:39 2015 No.8122502 >>8122492 They pretty much scream, I can't afford to go to a nice place. I think anon probably just lives in a shit hole. Anon are you Mexican?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 01:59:26 2015 No.8122520 >>8122502 No, I'm European.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:00:03 2015 No.8122522 >>8122497 Fuck you, you sound like a snob. Those girls probably have jobs and unlike you can't use money frivelosy. These girls actually have lives outisde lolita, now fuck off.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:01:18 2015 No.8122525 >>8122520 Sorry, I meant to ask the original who was was making of these girls.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:01:54 2015 No.8122526 >>8122502 Well, I mean, usually people go eat somewhere nice after seeing everything at the museum, I don't see how it necessarily screams poverty unless you live in a shithole that only has sad museums.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:05:11 2015 No.8122532

>>8122526
We only have one museum and our museum consists of a children's area, a children't jungle gym play area, mexican exhibits, and local artist "modern art". No joke, the museum is piss ass poor and hardly anybody goes unless free food is i nvolved.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:16:09 2015 No.8122553 >>8122468 fuck that looks really fun. i wish my comm was this fun. Its all older (26+) and very cliquish same few girls.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:23:33 2015 No.8122564 >>8122468 > wishes my town had an actual proper art museum/art gallery > nope.jpg > tourist bait

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 02:39:14 2015 No.8122590

My comm seems to be entirely made up almost entirely of cosplayers, so I don't really have much in common with them since lolita is my daily form of dress while to them it's more like a costume. A couple of them have an angry feminist vibe that's a little irksome, but they mostly seem nice enough, just not really on the same page as me and conversation gets turned to cosplay discussion.
Unrelated but I honestly do not understand the appeal of cosplay, it seems really expensive as well for something that has extremely limited usage, but hey at least cosplayers are having fun I think?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 03:17:26 2015 No.8122637 >>8122532 >tfw I live a block away from several of the world's most famous classical art musea Must suck to live in such a shithole town.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 03:26:50 2015 No.8122652 >>8122637 >musea Those pretentiousness levels are off the scale

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 04:36:42 2015 No.8122740

>>8122468
>I mean who has lolita meat ups at a public museum?

Is OP just butthurt or is that really not common?
I've been to museums with my comm a few times and we always had fun, not to mention we always went to a restaurant later too. Sure, if your city has no/only shitty museums this might not be an option, but almost every bigger city here has some nice museums to attend. And why not? You can still go to a nice restaurant afterwards. It is a nice way to get more people to a meet up as there are people who don't want to spend money on going to a restaurant (they can join for the museum).

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:17:15 2015 No.8122786

>>8122740
It's not really common at all unless you are part of some ratchet group.

>people who don't want to spend money on going to a restaurant

Well they obviously are in the wrong hobby if that is the case. "Oh boy I just bought this for 200 bucks, oh... well I can't afford to eat now." As ghetto as it sounds, even my lolita community in Alice can afford to do both.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:23:33 2015 No.8122791 >>8116700 if I see one more vague wtb post from her, I think I will scream

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:29:14 2015 No.8122802

>>8122786
Yes it is? Some people genuinely enjoy visiting museums and lots of big cities have several good museums in the area. It's good for winter when it's too cold to walk around shops outside but if you were just going to a restaurant the meet would be over in only an hour.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:30:03 2015 No.8122804
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>>8122786
Man you must be a fun person to be around. Glad people like you stay away from fun.

>"Oh my dress is TOO fancy to do anything so RATCHET. I spend $200 on it so obviously the only activity we can enjoy while wearing expensive dresses is going to high tea and feel better than everyone else!"

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:35:11 2015 No.8122811 >>8114636 My comm is nice, but almost everyone is so fat that it makes me feel weird being around them. >American feels

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:42:45 2015 No.8122822

>>8122804
Exactly! You can only spend so much time at high tea anyway, and in winter the choices of other after-food activities are pretty limited. Going to the cinema, for example, isn't free and actually makes you look a lot more ratchet than going to a museum or gallery.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:55:42 2015 No.8122830

>>8122822

You could go to one of these artsy movie theaters where the movie's about a dude stuck in a sand dune for two hours, and pretend to like it.

It's boring as fuck, but at least it's not 'ratchet.'

Your perceptions of ratchet are pretty weird is what I'm saying.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 05:56:59 2015 No.8122832 Can somebody tell me if the NW UK comm has calmed down ever since they kicked out the ones who were stirring up the trouble?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 06:23:18 2015 No.8122862 >>8122832 I have no idea. There are girls still in the comm and attending meets whose names were mentioned on Behind the Bows and although it could have been a revenge attack they were probably all just as bad as each other.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 06:24:46 2015 No.8122863 >>8122830 Mine? I'm not the poster who was calling museums ratchet, which is a weirder perception.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 07:24:17 2015 No.8122917 >>8114640 N-nobody??

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 08:04:00 2015 No.8122964

>>8122786
Have you heard of the concept of doing things with people that don't involve sitting on your ass shovelling food in your face you ratchet whale? The fact that you think people want to go to a museum because they can't afford tea and cake really makes me question your level of education.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 11:18:58 2015 No.8123170 >>8122917 Well I'm >>8116748 and honestly, I don't know the exact numbers of each comm in Germany. I'd say every major city has a comm, so I guess you'd have to be a bit more specific?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 11:38:01 2015 No.8123211 >Mods make a post about how to include newcomers >Never approach newcomers themselves >Or show up to meets outside their cliques

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 12:07:52 2015 No.8123255

My comm has had a huge influx of new people that actually come to meetups, so now most of our favorite places are too small to accommodate everyone. It's sort of a nice problem to have, but the mods are worried about having to enforce attendance caps. Honestly I wouldn't mind that, but I know some people would definitely get butthurt.

Other than that, very little drama, and our newbies are improving nicely. I think I'm pretty lucky to be in such a good comm.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 12:41:20 2015 No.8123321 >>8123211 It was a personal post, not a mod post. Hoe do you think we schuld welkome newbies then?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 12:42:22 2015 No.8123325 >>8123321 Should welcome

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 12:58:20 2015 No.8123350

I have kind of a weird issue. I really like my comm, I've been in it for years and aside from a few itas almost everybody is nice, well dressed and fun to hang around with. But my only issue is that several of the girls who have been in the comm the longest are REALLY FUCKING RUDE to people who come up to ask us for a picture or something. I really like these girls as friends, and they're always really nice in all situations until some poor old granny asks us where we're going dressed up so nicely, and then they fucking snap at her that "we always dress this way, we're just going to a cafe and we don't want to be bothered!!!". Two of the girls are the worst with this, they will literally curse at people who just ask for a picture while we're standing around waiting for the group to gather. They even literally said "We don't have anything, just go away" to an old homeless woman who came up to us and asked for spare change!
I fucking hate this behavior and it makes me super uncomfortable. Like, I can understand that you get a lot of people coming up to you all the time and it's tiring. But when someone politely asks you a question or asks for a picture, why be fucking salty and rude as hell to them?? It's not like they sneaked pictures of you or heckled you. I never know what to do in these situations, I hate that my friends and comm members give people a bad image of the fashion. I always try to give an apologetic glance or something to the poor people, but I wish I had the courage to speak up. How can I bring this up with them? I really wish they'd stop doing things like yelling at mothers who are just pointing out to their daughters how cute the princesses are.
>tl;dr: how do I stop my comm friends from being unnecessarily rude to random people

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:03:03 2015 No.8123357 WV comms?

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:05:27 2015 No.8123359

there are two people in my comm I'm not a fan of. One is a hardcore tumblrina, you can even tell by the way she types on the page- she has the "classic tumblr style" of writing and it's terrible. The other is always posting about meeting up in a city close by but no one knows who the fuck she is because she's never been to any of the main meet ups, so she gets ignored a lot. But everyday, I will wake up and go on facebook to see a notification from her about meeting up to The Hobbit or some shit.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:13:14 2015 No.8123376

>>8123350
My best friend was like this, often unnecessarily rude to anyone who stopped us while we were out. All I did was ask her why she talked to people that way, and when she got defensive ("it gets so old, it's annoying, people should mind their own business!"), I just told her I understand that it gets old, but that I found it unpleasant to be around her when she's acting like that. And from then on I made an effort to be the one to respond to strangers' approaches and do so politely but keep things short ("oh, we're just a fashion club, we get our clothes from Japan, thanks for asking!", something simple that shows you really don't have time to talk but aren't biting someone's head off). Since then, she at least doesn't act like that around me if she interacts with curious strangers while we're in lolita.

If you're close enough to them, I'd suggest calling them out on it directly but not in a bitchy way, just call attention to it. If you're uncomfortable with that, make an effort to be polite to strangers before your friends can be dicks to them.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:22:26 2015 No.8123397

>>8122590
There's a lot of people in my comm who are cosplayers as well, but are very active in lolita. It tends to go hand in hand with a lot of people and isn't all that uncommon, especially for those who discovered lolita through conventions/anime, etc. Seems to be a large portion of people in my comm.

It's something that's fun for conventions. It's fun to create costumes. I get a kick out of making something impressive from a pile of fabric and supplies. It's really just a craft that involves a lot of skill and practice.

Whereas with lolita, it's enjoyable to dress up, wear beautiful clothes, put time into your appearance, build a lovely wardrobe, and for some, collect items. There's differences, but I know people that can take both very seriously. That said, I try to keep the cosplay discussions out of lolita functions unless it's brought up.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:25:28 2015 No.8123403 >>8122468 tfw when I will never be that brolita in the picture hanging out with a 5/10 and 7/10.

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:30:19 2015 No.8123413

>>8122590
>>8123397
Same, my comm has a LOT of cosplayers who got into the fashion through anime/cons, but several of them also take lolita and jfashion seriously rather than treating it like a costume, even if they aren't wearing it daily.

And I agree that cosplay and lolita are enjoyable for different reasons. I love sewing in general and really enjoy working on the skills you can learn as a cosplayer (makeup, props, wigs, etc), some of which becomes useful irl on occasion, and I like lolita because I admire the clothing, like fashion in general, and enjoy being able to embrace a more feminine look than I have the other ~5 days each week since I don't have a lolita-friendly work environment.

To each their own, though, obviously, but yeah, I sometimes wish the conversations at lolita meets didn't turn into cosplay talk so often.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 13:57:36 2015 No.8123481 >>8122917 There is also a very active Germany thread, why not ask there?

Anonymous Mon Feb 16 14:04:37 2015 No.8123503

>>8123350
Are they over compensating in a way? I feel if you feel it's necessary to shout and people that THIS IS TOTALLY A NORMAL DAILY FASHION it probably isn't for you. I mean you take your time to dress up super pretty for pictures with a group of people with similar interests. You're clearly not just going grocery shopping. You are kind of going some place dressed up extra nicely.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 20:11:22 2015 No.8124571 Is it normal to just join the comm facebook group out of the blue? I don't know anyone in my local comm and i don't even know if it's really active or not

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 20:17:46 2015 No.8124582 >>8124571 If you get a response within a week, that means your comm is still active. Otherwise, send a PM to the mod with a reason for joining if you don't hear back after a while.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 16 20:22:05 2015 No.8124593 >>8123403 That is a girl you fucking piece of uneducated shit.

Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:32:02 2015 No.8127124

I'm fairly new to my comm, at least in comparison to many of the other members, but I really like it so far.

I only recently started hearing about drama I guess. Apparently one girl tried attacking another member through a window or something? Don't know the details but I kek'd

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:38:08 2015 No.8127141 >>8122497 Dirty old museum? Wtf third world country do you live in? Museums in my city are famous. You clearly have never been to a decent museum.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:40:00 2015 No.8127146 >>8124571 I would PM a mod and introduce myself and ask to be added.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:40:49 2015 No.8127147 >>8122786 Just because you live with crappy museums in your area doesn't mean the rest of the world has crap museums. Museum meets aren't uncommon at all, stop projecting.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:42:35 2015 No.8127154 >>8115495 Nope, not the only one. I also go to meets for pretty much these reasons. It's a light, pleasant, frivolous way to pass an afternoon.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 19:46:32 2015 No.8127161 >>8122502 Anon you probably shouldn't join the comm then. No one wants your salty racist ass.

Anonymous Tue Feb 17 20:32:57 2015 No.8127296

>>8127141
I live in the Rio Grande Valley, South Texas. In this area there are literally no other Asian lolitas just cosplayers who dress in lolita who act like autistic brats. my idea of a get together isn't going to a ugle museum and going to a thrift store.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 20:35:33 2015 No.8127304 >>8127296 Who thrifts in Lolita? I love me some thrifting but most of those places are pretty jumbled and dirty.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 20:41:34 2015 No.8127324 >>8121533 Nothing happened within the comm. It was the blogging and crazy fans that did it. I wouldn't be surprised if she had legit stalkers, the way some of them acted.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 20:42:13 2015 No.8127326 >>8127304 They go thrifting in lolita, Walmart, and even McDonalds...

Anonymous Tue Feb 17 22:14:22 2015 No.8127495

>>8123350
They act like rude bitches that to random people, but are nice to people they know.
Honestly they sound like they're not really great people to begin with and only act decent to people they like. People who are actually nice wouldn't act like that to begin with.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 17 22:27:08 2015 No.8127510 >>8116355 My comm does that too. We don't allow people to come to meets if they won't be wearing lolita (unless it's a casual meetup). It kind of defeats the purpose of a lolita meet if you also allow people to just show up wearing whatever.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 02:25:53 2015 No.8127925 >>8127296 >expecting Asian lolitas >kek

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:15:43 2015 No.8127984 >>8127925 My mistake for thinking that but at least I dropped a pricey hobby, I don't want to be the only Asian in that ghetto group. I rather just keep cosplaying and focus on that.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:22:11 2015 No.8127990 >>8127984 you sound racist tbh

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:22:18 2015 No.8127991 >>8127984 Cosplaying in the RGV sucks too :/ pretty sure half the people who do it here were in a bad cosplay thread earlier. Going to SA, Austin, and Houston are better choices.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:32:28 2015 No.8128012 File: 55 KB, 640x695, 1412988274312.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8127984 if the only thing you're worrying about is the people around you instead of the clothes themselves than its a good thing you left, more burandou for me.

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:45:41 2015 No.8128026
File: 326 KB, 2048x1536, DCIM_06540613.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8127991
I go to whatever few events they have just to see freinds for cosplay but nobody there ever recognizes what character I am. Luckily I don't enter their contest for ribbons and printed prizes.

>>8127990
Maybe I am but I don't want to be associated with lolitas who go around acting like children running around, screaming in malls and thrift stores.

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 03:58:29 2015 No.8128044

There is on girl in my local community and she is a pain. She talks fake in real life and online is just embarrassing. She posts on closet of frills in a dirty matted split wig and a long wall of text about how speshul she is. She was chased out of two other communities and i didn't think she would last in mine

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 04:56:08 2015 No.8128110 >>8114647 > 50$ being steep in Lolita okaay.jpg

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 04:56:49 2015 No.8128111 >>8114647 bostooon

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 05:10:24 2015 No.8128131 Nignog detected! Now go back to being a cum bucket in some shady porn studio and let the women talk!

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 05:15:33 2015 No.8128137 >>8123350 > crying over homeless people getting treated as they always do and deserve to be treated You sound stupid enough to get raped and murdered by one for a one dollar bill

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 05:19:38 2015 No.8128142 >>8124593 Calm your cock bro you make a real 2/10 loli

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 05:24:22 2015 No.8128145 Any info on the Toronto Canada comm? I moved there recently. Drama? Gossip? LolCows?

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 06:53:06 2015 No.8128208 >>8127324 More details?

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 07:26:39 2015 No.8128241 >>8123321 Welcome them by actually interacting and attempting to be-friend

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 07:58:39 2015 No.8128258

>>8117267
that sounds like a comm i tried to go to for a meetup (during vacation at home vs school= new comm) and I went to this restaurant with only two others (one didnt even talk) and saw a group of 10 other who apparently organized it between themselves and not the fb group. Not sue if i ever want to go to a thing again by them if they want to let new comers feel left out.

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 15:09:48 2015 No.8128899

Our comm is huge and for how large it is, there's only a few dramamongers and everyone is nice for the most part.

There's this clique I really I want to be a part of. The lolitas are so much fucking fun and do non-rovery-rorita activities, like drinking, partaking in paraphernalia, and partying. I saw one girl sneak in edibles at a meet and pass them around with her friends - nobody really knew but I saw the packaging and recognized it right away. I can't help but spill my spaghetti every time they tried to talk to me though
>mfw Im too stupid to strike up a conversation
>smoke a bowl alone
>forever alone

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 15:20:34 2015 No.8128917 >>8128899 >make edibles >bring to meet >share with them >profit

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 15:21:53 2015 No.8128922 >>8128899 Guh, I have the same problem! I know a pair of girls in the comm that seem like so much fun, but they are both are lifestylers, and I'm a once in a blue moon lolita, so I doubt we can be friends.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 15:43:55 2015 No.8128958 >>8128899 Is it so hard to strike up a conversation? Walk next to the, sit next to them?

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 17:18:04 2015 No.8129186

>>8128208
There really aren't any beyond that. Her FB page is gone so I can't show you the crazy directly. One girl I remember really clearly would beg for the Honeycake JSK she had on pretty much every photo or video. Another girl regularly said shit like "you're the reason I'm still alive". And she had a bunch of people who just were copying her in general, and calling her their idol/senpai and not being sarcastic about it.

Internet/e-fame is fucking scary shit, dude. It's not like being a real celebrity where you have an agent and a publicist and a team of handlers that keep your fans out of your face. E-fame, they think they know you because you replied to their comments, and get right up in your business.

Anonymous Wed Feb 18 22:33:16 2015 No.8129909

>>8122468
I really cannot believe you would trash your own area you live in as well as the people who live here as well. As a professional cosplayer I've got to say that is totally uncalled for and unnecessary. And for you to be calling us all mexicans or trailer trash well excuse me Stacey Aprille Apolinario not all of us were lucky enough to be born a special snowflake asian in an area made up of 90% hispanics. You dont like it then gtfo bitch, you give us hard working cosplayers a bad name here in the valley. As a founding member for the nerdgasm girls I can assure you we would never ask for you to join in any of our shoots now or ever you racist bitch.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 18 23:05:14 2015 No.8129969 >>8129909 > as a professional cosplayer > professional cosplayer > professional Stopped reading right there.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 02:24:00 2015 No.8130389 >>8115390 We have some SJW's in my community too. They are fucking god awful. Breathe at them the wrong way and you are an abelist, sexist, bigoted, piece of shit. Being around them is terrible.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 03:26:19 2015 No.8130477 >>8117267 I think it depends. Occasionally we have huge creeps hanging out on the public group or girls that just seem crazy.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 03:28:43 2015 No.8130481 >>8129909 >nerdgasm girls Kek. Ok.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 04:24:02 2015 No.8130536 >>8121429 sounds familiar what comm?

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 04:29:35 2015 No.8130540 >>8127324 Speaking of crazy fans Pixielocks is trying so fucking hard to take Milkyfawn's place and it's so obvious it hurts.

Anonymous Thu Feb 19 04:42:54 2015 No.8130554

>>8128922
That's totally not true...or they're not worth being friends with. So you wear lolita less frequently, so what? Friends should like you for you, and I'm sure they'd probably enjoy your company. Go try being friends with them :)
If they don't want to be friends, just move on because there's too many people who DO want to be around you to waste time on the ones who don't.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 05:55:59 2015 No.8130617 >>8128145 2nding this ask!

Anonymous Thu Feb 19 06:48:32 2015 No.8130656

>>8121341
You obviously haven't had to put up with her constant spammy, almost impossible to understand posts.

She takes close up pictures of dress bodices as sales pictures. Wants to buy bodyline's entire catalogue of wa lolita as dream items. Also she doesn't actually know what a petticoat is (or "the puffy t skirt u were under them" as she calls it)

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 07:43:03 2015 No.8130693 >>8130536 One of the UK ones.

Anonymous Thu Feb 19 07:47:55 2015 No.8130699

>>8114640
Well I'm not in a comm myself, since I'm just not into meet-ups, but if you wanted to know some meet-ups you should check out the german lolita community website: http://dunkelsuess.de/site/index.php/Lexikon/Regionaltreffen?from=Magazin.Events

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 15:50:44 2015 No.8131309 Are there any comms around the WV Tri-State area?

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 16:13:03 2015 No.8131339 >>8130693 Can you say which one? I'm from the UK and am changing comms soon so I'd like to know.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 17:16:03 2015 No.8131437 >>8131339 Not that anon, but where are you changing from/to?

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 18:08:32 2015 No.8131509 >>8131339 The comm with the photographer is a drama comm anyway. It's NW, so if you're moving to there I pity you anyway. To be fair, I dunno how many meets the photographer actually goes to. I just see him post on the page a fuckton.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 19:02:10 2015 No.8131602 >>8119602 eugh fuck no, don't force flakes onto another comm... actually please do! We don't need her here she actually scares off other lolitas who want to join.

Anonymous Thu Feb 19 19:06:50 2015 No.8131610
File: 103 KB, 500x375, 1418156191175.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Would anyone from the Brisbane comm be willing to introduce me to everybody at some point so that I don't stand off to the side like a frilly idiot the whole time?

I'm hoping that I can make it to the Marine Museum meet.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 19:20:12 2015 No.8131653 >>8131610 Just ask on the page someone would be willinh to heelp, maybe heather? Just stay away from the two faced ita bogan in our group, Wraith aka Kate she's a shitlord at our meets.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 19 20:21:44 2015 No.8131802 >>8131653 I was thinking of asking Heather. I've spoken to her before and whenever the Bris comm comes up she's mentioned as being really nice. Thanks, anon!

>>	Anonymous Fri Feb 20 06:59:02 2015 No.8132783 >>8131802 Hey anon I'm definetly happy to introduce you to everyone at the meet and I really do hope you do get to come. It sounds like it's going to be a great meet. Feel free to message me sometime to discuss it or if you just want to talk dresses.

Anonymous Fri Feb 20 14:16:42 2015 No.8133330

I really like my comm. Low/no drama, pretty well-dressed with no it a lolcows (yet not intimidatingly brandwhorish - the sort of dress level where no-one is embarrassing to be seen with but I'm still better than a lot of comm members, which suits me just fine), fairly wide age range but mostly sensible fun women in their mid-20s with a cynical attitude towards famewhores, no sissy interlopers, a few flakes but quite a lot of regulars, pretty friendly. Perhaps some seagulls would think the SJW element in the comm was too strong, but I'll take adult feminist tumblr-users over weeby ita teens any day.

(That is only the local comm I actually attend though. There are others within driving distance but they have too many weeby teens so I stay away.)

>>	Anonymous Sat Feb 21 22:00:18 2015 No.8136142 File: 77 KB, 720x960, DCIM_0221156.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8128026 Example of lolitas who go around acting like children and acting autistic. Imagine seeing your fellow lolitas doing this constantly.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 22 11:33:22 2015 No.8137182 anyone from vancouver in here? I'm not in the community but I'm thinking of joining, what's it like?

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 22 11:50:58 2015 No.8137209 I adore my comm<3 We are v v small, but there is never drama, we are all really good friends outside the fashion and do have non Lolita meets to get to know one another too~

Anonymous Sun Feb 22 12:32:29 2015 No.8137259

My local comm is really small. We're about 50/50 ita versus decently dressed. But a lot of the girls are still really cheap so our meets aren't usually very exciting. Thankfully the whiny-est, most annoying girl has left the fashion. We're pretty spread out so travel was required for meets and she would always beg for a ride from someone because she doesn't like to drive herself, even though she is out of the way for 99% of the other me members.

Anonymous Sun Feb 22 23:03:09 2015 No.8138578

>>8122468
First of all the meet up was at a cafe where we had brunch and we decided to go to the Museum afterwards. Second, it's Meet ups not Meat ups. Third, If you live down here then you fucking know that theres isn't much to do down here since the Valley isn't very posh. Also us having fun in lolita doesn't mean you have to have a fucking stick up your ass and act very demure all the time. I don't know about you but if you think thats how you have to act all the time in lolita then i'm sorry for you. Save your money and save us from having you join.

Anonymous Sun Feb 22 23:07:44 2015 No.8138590

>>8136142
There was no one around, it wasn't an official meet up, it was only three of us, and this was posted on only one of our face books and we have a good idea whoever you are that shit talking on us. And again, at least we have fun unlike you with a stick up your ass all the time.

>>	Anonymous Sun Feb 22 23:09:23 2015 No.8138595 >>8122468 Your vendetta is showing Anon. Especially since you posted photos of only us instead of the comm as a whole. Ps. Your not Asian no matter how hard you try to look it ;)

Anonymous Sun Feb 22 23:17:47 2015 No.8138610

>>8136142
This is a good example of not pretending to be a delicate flower. I don't let Lolita dictate my personality. Im still me, this is simply a method of dress I enjoy. If there is no one around except for close friends then having some fun is harmless. Especially because the photos are kept private and not shared or used as examples of proper public etiquette, the only apparent mistake I see is letting you pollute our friends list. A problem very easily rectified.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 00:22:02 2015 No.8138748 >>8122468 >who has lolita meat ups at a public museum? anon have you ever heard of this thing called an education? It is a typical thing that lolitas do

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 00:31:15 2015 No.8138781 >>8136142 man, you don't sound like fun

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 03:05:09 2015 No.8139046 >>8138595 >Ps. Your not Asian no matter how hard you try to look it ;) you don't sound much better than them with that casual racism, tbh

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 03:07:39 2015 No.8139052 Only three girls went to my comms last meet. I feel really bad because I was going to go but I got flooded in.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 03:07:59 2015 No.8139054 >>8129909 doesn't seem like much of a loss for them there, you should try harder

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 03:25:19 2015 No.8139078 >>8139052 I feel you. i always have last minute urgent matters to attend but really regret not going... my comm has been around for 10+ years and about 3-5 people show up when the facebook has over 50 members.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 03:54:06 2015 No.8139106

>>8122590
> it seems really expensive as well for something that has extremely limited usage
Oh my god, hahaha. I've had the exact same thought, only about getting into lolita after being a cosplayer for 5+ years. I've got a pretty good personal stock of fabric and sewing supplies so I don't have to spend that much anymore to create new costumes (maybe $40-50 on simple costumes, $100+ for more elaborate ones or things that require notions I don't already have). I've been trying to put together a first coord and I can't even begin to count the number of times my eyes have bugged out of my head at the price tag on a $300+ burando jsk.

It's nice to see someone's perspective from the other side of the fence, haha.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 05:17:04 2015 No.8139169

I love most of my comm but I find myself forcing myself to go to meets because of one individual. I like everyone else at the meets and try to stick with them but this girl is just so over-bearing and has to make everything about her.
She's one of these girls who, good or bad situation, has had it better or worse.
You've done something? She's done it too but better. You're having a bad day and quietly talking to friends about it? She listens in and then berates you because you haven't considered that some people (I.e her) have it so much worse; one of those check your health privilege types.
Just the idea of having to spend time in her vicinity puts me off meets but I persevere as the benefits of seeing my friends outweigh the negatives of enduring the endless pity party.
There only seem to be 2/3 people in the comm who actually like her so I don't know why she hasn't just been told to get lost. (I know I know I should do it myself but I'm scared of confrontation and a number of the girls are quite ballsy tbh)

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 05:25:38 2015 No.8139173

>>8139106
>I've got a pretty good personal stock of fabric and sewing supplies so I don't have to spend that much anymore to create new costumes
Once you have your basics together (blouses, accesoires, shoes etc) creating a new coord is relatively easy and cheap, depending on what you want to coord you can create several coords for one dress without having to buy new stuff.

>I've been trying to put together a first coord and I can't even begin to count the number of times my eyes have bugged out of my head at the price tag on a $300+ burando jsk.
>$300+ burando jsk
Either you are after popular releases, trying to buy new from brands or not looking at the right place. Usually Burando is way cheaper second hand. If you look at CLoset Child, any of the auction sites or other second hand places you can easily get burando for $40-$100. Even on the Western market you can get burando for $100 or less, I just bought a Btssb jsk for $60 on LM.
Sure, the first coords will be more expensive because you need to buy everything, but as said - once you have your basics it gets less expensive. Not to mention you can wear Lolita more often than a cosplay.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 05:43:53 2015 No.8139187 >>8139169 UK?

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 05:52:12 2015 No.8139192

>>8139173
I'd appreciate it if people stopped saying that you can get 2nd hand burando for as cheap as $40.The kind of jsks/ops that go low are either seriously damaged or seriously unpopular and that means very likely the person you are trying to school on burando prices simply doesn't want that item either (not because it's not popular with others they are trying to impress but because it's a design that's not appealing to them).
This is coming from someone who isn't into prints and usually loves those cheap brand items.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:14:05 2015 No.8139211

>>8139052
My comm has a ton of members but only the same 5-6 people that come to each meet

>there's even some members who have straight up said they would never go to a meet up. Like why bother joining a comm? I don't want to see you talking about and posting pictures of all the cute cafes you went to by yourself

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:15:23 2015 No.8139212

>>8139192
Even if you don't want these kind of dresses it's just super easy to get brand for less than $300 which is what i was trying to say. I wish people would stop saying
>I can't even begin to count the number of times my eyes have bugged out of my head at the price tag on a $300+ burando jsk

Maybe that's just my pet peeve and I don't want to judge the anon who wrote this but in general I'm super annoyed at people who are new to the fashion and crying about that $300 burando price tag and how every Lolita dress is sooo expensive!!1 $300 for burando!!11
To keep it on topic: New people in my comm do this too, writing semi passive agressive posts about "Waaah waah brand is always so expensive waah" always with these made up super high prices, while in reality unless you buy new from rand shops or are after rare dresses you rarely pay that much for dresses. Not to mention it mostly has this judgemental tone a la "bohoo all your brandwhores in your $500 dresses while I'M the only newbie on a budget! ;_; >:("

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:29:29 2015 No.8139222
File: 22 KB, 250x333, ChestSwitchingStripedJSK-sax.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8139192
Eh, I have seen even cute stuff go for super cheap on Japanese auctions. Like I lost an auction on a gelato JSK in lavender because my highest bid was set to 4,500 and someone bid like 5,000. It's not the most popular shit, but there is still a lot of decent stuff out there for very cheap if you know where to look. My first brand dress cost me around 7k, iirc, and while it's not a popular release, I think it's pretty damn cute.
>still laugh when people try to sell this for like $200+

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:34:32 2015 No.8139226
File: 100 KB, 240x320, baby_jsk_lacefrilldoublewaistribbon_color2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8139192
Pfft, I have gotten many brand dresses in good condition for $40 or under. It's just that they're not printed or super popular, sometimes the listing has bad photos or is hard to find. I got this JSK (almost the same, but the lower lace was a nicer design) for 1000 yen plus a BL blouse and a Chocomint headbow last year, that was one of my best finds.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:37:40 2015 No.8139228 File: 80 KB, 360x640, 406753193.1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8139226 Got this for about 4000 yen

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:39:27 2015 No.8139230 File: 43 KB, 300x400, 2242407003_5f73b2ff76.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8139228 And this for 3000 yen, plus many more but I don't want to spam the thread too much.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:46:27 2015 No.8139235

>>8139212

Not the other anon, but I think if you're going to tell newbies to buy secondhand, at least be fair to them and tell them the cheap secondhand is going to be used goods, possibly in dodgy condition, probably unpopular or plain fugly, and that you had to search a long time to find someone selling it at that $40. It's equally unfair to a newbie to get into what they thought was an affordable hobby, only to find they are forever limited to scraping the dregs of secondhand sales markets.

I get what you mean with people whining about brand being expensive, but I've got the opposite opinion. I'd rather we tell newbies that yes, lolita *is* expensive, and no, it carries no status value, in fact it marks you as a bit of a weirdo for wearing it.

I'm getting tired of newbies lowballing sellers thinking that all secondhand burando needs to be under $100, or getting sticker shock over a $200 lucky pack when the dresses are normally $300, or callling scalper when a seller posts a bnwt dress at above retail price, or throwing some kind of tantrum because the $300 dress they couldn't afford now goes for $500 on the secondhand market. Lolita hobby does cost money, especially if your taste *is* the popular stuff. I'd rather they get sticker shock now and leave, rather than trying to get into the hobby and then throwing tantrums for the next few months while they figure out that they like expensive things that they can't afford. Which sounds like what's happening in your comm.

With regards to the original cosplayer anon, you could have pointed out taobao dresses cost $100+ brand new, and then point out that the cost of buying a cosplay from taobao is also around that price, except that the secondhand lolita market is very active, so you could get at least half your money back whereas cosplay costumes are harder to sell. I think it's a far better argument than trying to focus solely on finding secondhand brand that costs under $100.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 06:47:22 2015 No.8139237 >>8139187 No mainland EU (coincidently I'm originally from UK but moved after dad got a new job). But sad to see it's not a unique problem.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:00:13 2015 No.8139242 >>8136142 Please don't compare me to trashy bitches who think it's cute and edgy to act like a stripper and flash their ass in public. I may be an autist but even I'm not that embarrassing.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:02:18 2015 No.8139243

>>8139235
>I'd rather they get sticker shock now and leave, rather than trying to get into the hobby and then throwing tantrums for the next few months while they figure out that they like expensive things that they can't afford. Which sounds like what's happening in your comm.
The problem isn't that they realise it costs money, but that most are far overestimating WHAT Lolita actually costs, and then proceed to whine and bitch and beg for cheap brand or alternatives or how superior their cheaper Bodyline/Taoabo stuff is compared to all these "$300 burando!!1"

And what's with the $40? That was just one estimated price range, I'm not trying to say all brand should be $40 or less than $100, but finding something under $300 isn't hard. Even for newbies who don't want to buy from the auctions or even CC it's not that hard to find a dress on the second hand Western market for under $300. Just look on LM for ten minutes. Or maybe have patience and within a few days or weeks you could be lucky and make a great deal. It's not that hard.
But most newbies would rather throw a tantrum why they don't get a cheap burando dress NOW or why everything is so expensive and that everyone who owns brand is a brandwhore and has a secret sugar daddy or whatever.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:08:50 2015 No.8139251 Are there any nice comms in England?

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:17:31 2015 No.8139262

My comm is huge and as such, tends to split into smaller groups. I'm bad with crowds so large meetups aren't an option for me, but most of the smaller meetups are private ones between friends. The only smaller meets that aren't private mostly attract newbies/teenagers/itas. They're pleasant enough people but I can only take so many conversations about the mean popular girls at school, replicas being superior to brand or whatever tumblr's social justice issue of the month is.
I really regret not joining the comm years ago when I was still a teenage ita myself. Sure the pictures would have been bad but at least I would have had the opportunity to meet more girls my age.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:26:08 2015 No.8139268

>>8139243

That's the problem with newbies, to you, $40 is the lowest end. To them, they're thinking "oh so $40 burando exists! I will only buy those!". That's how they end up exaggerating a $300 dress into $500, someone told them SS fees and shipping costs x amount and they just added $200 to the cost of everything.

Even $40-100 is still fairly low. If you want something contemporary, it's more likely to be $100-$200. $40-100 is generally for old school lolita or very unpopular items. It's great if it's your taste, but not everyone likes it; there's a reason it's that cheap after all. The "under $300" revised estimate is definitely more realistic.

I'm not really sure that there's any way to deal with how dumb the younger newbies can be other than to block them if you find them that annoying. If they aren't complaining about the prices of the dresses they'd be whinging about how they couldn't get the latest AP release and when is the replica coming out, or Tenso being difficult to deal with, or having a new dream dress every other weekend. Complaining about sugar daddies and brandwhores is just another stupid thing they do.

I originally objected to your advice as you specifically responded to a cosplayer who wasn't a lolita (yet), which is what I thought was unfair. If you're going to get someone into lolita, telling them cheap secondhand burando can be had for $100 is somewhat misleading. On the other hand, if you want to argue with newbies bitching that they're too poor to buy burando, the argument you put forth would have been perfectly fine.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:39:04 2015 No.8139284

>>8139268
>I originally objected to your advice as you specifically responded to a cosplayer who wasn't a lolita (yet), which is what I thought was unfair. If you're going to get someone into lolita, telling them cheap secondhand burando can be had for $100 is somewhat misleading. On the other hand, if you want to argue with newbies bitching that they're too poor to buy burando, the argument you put forth would have been perfectly fine.
Yeah, my response got a bit carried away. In short I just wanted to let cosplay anon know not to be afraid of Lolita and that you don't need to spend as much money as $300 per dress.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:49:32 2015 No.8139298 >>8138595 What normal asian/anybody would try to be into lolita? Most places people try to stick in or look older.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 07:52:02 2015 No.8139302 >>8138610 >>8138610 >This is a good example of not pretending to be a delicate flower. >What are you on? If people arent like this then we are faking it?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:04:36 2015 No.8139318 >>8139302 edited >This is a good example of not pretending to be a delicate flower. What are you on? If people aren't like this then we are faking it?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:07:09 2015 No.8139323 I'm not that active in my local comm. I wish I could go to meet ups but besides transportation issues, I lack actual cords. I'm a disgrace. I'm so sorry guys.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:21:35 2015 No.8139330 >>8124571 That's what I did but my comm doesn't seem to have meets outside of cons and a lot of them hop the border and go to other comms meets. The page goes at least a month between new posts

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:22:28 2015 No.8139333 >>8139251 Leeds & Sheffield are good

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:23:52 2015 No.8139336 >>8139226 That's exactly what I said though? Damaged or not popular. Thanks for backing me up.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:29:50 2015 No.8139345
File: 479 KB, 480x270, 1423805112471.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8139333

Does anyone know if there's any comms in the East Midlands? Nottingham/Birmingham/maybe even Manchester perhaps?

I did do a google, but loads of the posts are from 2008, and I wouldn't even know where to begin looking in any real depth for one.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 08:36:50 2015 No.8139352 >>8139345 Don't go to Manchester, whatever you do. There is a midlands comm. Join that.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 09:10:03 2015 No.8139377

>>8139336
You said "seriously damaged or seriously unpopular." There's a difference between being hideous and widely disliked and just being a basic (i.e. not popular/well known) nonprint piece, which is what a lot of cheap pieces are. The community is so are hyped into prints or super elaborate lace mountains that a lot of simpler stuff goes unnoticed. Neither I nor the other anon ever said you could buy this season's new hot print for less than $100, but you can buy a lot of solid, under-loved pieces at that price point.
While I'm not saying we should run around telling people it's a "cheap" fashion/hobby, I agree with the other anon that I'm sick of hearing "wahhh, lolita is so expensive! Who has money for $300 dresses??!?"
I've spent more than $300 on maybe 4 or 5 dresses out of the 30-40 that I've owned, and those were all super popular releases (Chocolate Rosette, Honey Cake, Antoinette Fleur, etc.).
Hell, I got the DDC jsk nwot for like $210. You just need to keep an eye out and have a bit of patience.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 09:19:09 2015 No.8139383 >>8139336 As if you're going to get Holy Lantern or another popular print for anything less than $400. What a moron.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:04:16 2015 No.8139442 >>8139352 Didn't the NW dramacows move to the Midlands comm?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:08:17 2015 No.8139446 >>8139377 >unpopular Can you please stop ranting and just read what I said?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:20:48 2015 No.8139465 >>8139446 not those anons but I think there's a difference between a release flopping and being very unpopular and one being meh-levels of popular which is what they seem to be arguing

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:25:38 2015 No.8139475 >tfw everybody cool in your comm either left or rarely shows up to meets. >tfw they keep having events at anime conventions and they all look like shit. >tfw weebs invading. >tfw hug box itas everywhere now Save me anon.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:27:39 2015 No.8139480 >>8139465 Well I did say for $40 it has to be seriously unpopular. For $100 it would just be unpopular.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 10:46:27 2015 No.8139504 >>8139475 I just hate that cons/lolita/cosplay are so intertwined in general nowadays. I have no interest in flavor of the month anime, fandoms, etc. and everyone in my comm who is really into that shit, even the slightly older ones.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:20:23 2015 No.8139546 >>8139262 NYC?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:30:01 2015 No.8139564 >>8136142 That's hot

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:41:35 2015 No.8139585 File: 65 KB, 528x960, IMG_20280127512511.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] This wreck is moving back to our con state:/ who ever had her, I'm guessing Houston, take it back.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:45:10 2015 No.8139598 >>8116403 Most are not active, i wish it will be purged.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:46:12 2015 No.8139602 >>8116700 Oh god I thought this was a dude

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:47:14 2015 No.8139605

>>8139504
This.
I hate anime with a passion.

The con this weekend everybody just went full weeb mode and it was absolutely embarrassing.

One of the mods wouldn't shut up about Jojo and kept making stupid poses and I could see up her dress constantly because of it.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:47:53 2015 No.8139606 >>8117799 Why don't you wear some fucking foundation then

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:58:19 2015 No.8139627

>>8139480
>tfw I once snagged an undamaged ETC OP from CC that regularly turns up in dream dress threads
>for $60
welp

Lots of cute non-print dresses and print skirts hover around $60 on CC. You only end up paying significantly over $100 for very popular sweet pieces, hard to find classic pieces and MmM. Fucking MmM.

>>8139475
Same. My comm has such a huge influx of fandom coords that it's almost become the norm. At the last meet I was asked by a girl in a SM-inspired coord what the 'theme' of my outfit was. I was like, strawberries I guess? She was so confused by that answer because she was honestly under the impression that lolita coords always needed to have some character theme like Usagi, Kyary, Madoka, Alice in Wonderland, Snow White, little red riding hood, cute witch, whatever.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 11:59:40 2015 No.8139630

>>8139605
I watch anime/read manga occasionally and was a pretty weeby kid (though I hid my power level pretty well), but I'm incredibly picky about what I consume, don't make time to watch tv that often, and hate modern/tumblr fandom culture.

If I have to hear about Free!/Shitgeki/KLK one more time, I swear I'm going to blow a fuse. I can understand not wanting to discuss sensitive stuff like politics or whatever over tea, but can we at least talk about something not horribly weeby? The conversation always devolves into memetic bullshit, screeching, or, like you said, stupid poses/behavior.
Whenever I try to introduce a new topic or steer the conversation in a new direction these two obnoxious girls will basically interrupt me, talk over me, and force the conversation to stay on whatever it was they were freaking out about.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:10:15 2015 No.8139643

>>8139630
Totally agreed.
I don't mind it when people talk about their fandoms but there's two girls here who just would not shut up about LoL/Anime.
They didn't go on about it all the time but when they started they wouldn't shut up. It's like a time bomb.

There was a girl who left who really liked Warcraft and I'd ask her about stuff every once in a while but she'd drop the subject after a few minutes.

Maybe I'm being a bit pissy because it was an anime convention but every meet up I've been to is like too. It's old. I want to hang out with adults and talk about lots of things not just nerdy stuff.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:31:32 2015 No.8139670 >>8139606 Hi harry

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:35:08 2015 No.8139677 >>8139670 is he a wizard

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:38:19 2015 No.8139682

Apologies for being a little spazzy and excited but.... I went to my first meet yesterday!! It was the first time having high tea too! I read a lot of horror stories on cgl about some members in my community but I am so glad I went anyway. All of the lolitas looked immaculate, so I feel really lucky to be a part of an actual comm now instead of being a lone lolita.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:40:54 2015 No.8139684 >>8137182 It seems like there are a lot of events that are not posted to the main fb page, so sort of cliquey I suppose. I haven't been to many meets yet, but would enjoy going to more. The girls I've seen were generally well dressed.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:52:02 2015 No.8139703 >>8129186 I know one of these girls, Laura right? Calls herself minty fawn, asked Alanah for her autograph when she bought a choc dress from her

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 12:52:38 2015 No.8139705 File: 73 KB, 800x460, turq-cords-2011.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8139323 Here, have some cords.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:01:23 2015 No.8139716 does anyone else have annoying vegans in their comm? they are the most unpleasant people to have at a meet

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:05:04 2015 No.8139724 >>8139716 Cute steak house meetup time!

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:07:15 2015 No.8139727

>>8139284
>>8139268

Y-yikes, sorry friends. >>8139106 anon here - I didn't mean to be inflammatory or complain that burando cost too much. I just thought it was funny that someone had thought the exact same thing about cosplay that I had initially thought about lolita. You're both right about the $300 thing - I had been looking at buying new brand and had factored in the JPY->USD conversion as well as shipping, so I guess I was being misleading. I'm a funny size (tall) and had been told to look into IW's long dresses, and when I couldn't find a lot of them secondhand I figured I might as well find out what the cost of new brand would be. I've also seen a few attractive listings on LM that have also been above $300, but most of those were (what I assumed to be) out of production popular prints.

No offense meant, the eyes bugging out of my head comment was more representative of the feeling when you plan to go shopping and realize you have to transition to window shopping instead. It's a bummer, but I know I have to save more before I can afford the stuff I want.

Sage for not contributing. To be more on topic, I guess shit like this is why I'm a little nervous to join a comm. I keep thinking I'll end up with my foot in my mouth and everyone will be to polite to tell me to take it out.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:13:03 2015 No.8139735

>>8139716
We have a couple of vegan comm members, and thankfully they are super quiet about it, and always contribute really good vegan stuff to potluck meets. It's actually really helpful for the people who are La those intolerant, too, since it gives them a wider variety of "safe" foods.

We used to have someone who was annoyingly vocal about it, but thankfully she doesn't really come around much anymore.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:25:13 2015 No.8139757 >>8139716 MB claimed to be a vegan and whined about it but ordered meat at every meetup.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:25:49 2015 No.8139759

>>8139716
>>8139735
Sorry on behalf of the nice vegans out there. We're not all loud mouth assholes, I promise.

I'm probably the only vegan in my comm but I'm pretty sure no one cares. If we do potlucks or something, I just bring contributions I'm comfortable eating. And if we go out, I either call ahead and confirm veg options are possible or eat beforehand and snack on a few smaller dishes. I'm there to socialize anyways!

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:28:15 2015 No.8139765 >>8139757 from sf? as if i needed more reasons to avoid that lot.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:32:36 2015 No.8139771

>>8139682
congrats on your first meet! my comm had a high tea meetup yesterday too and i'm soo sad i didn't get to go. are you part of SF by any chance?

>>8139757
o god i remember being confused as shit about that too. and how he was vehemently against gmo products when he sure as hell didnt order organic. i hate that MB is still being associated with the SF comm when we gave him the ban hammer a few months ago

>>8139765
please don't avoid us! we kicked out and banned all the creeps. there are a ton of new lolitas joining the comm now and we're much more active than before.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:34:44 2015 No.8139775 >>8139757 >Melissa is now friends with Sissy Maid Tanya KEK

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:34:54 2015 No.8139776 >>8139383 not that anon except there are lots of popular prints in the 100-400 range, so long as they're not Iron Gate tier or the like

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 13:40:16 2015 No.8139785

>>8139771
I've run into you guys a few times at baby over the last 5 years, but I've always been a bit shy about officially attending the meetups. Is it weird for SO to attend too (we're not from the city so it's hard for me to come alone)?

MB always gave me the creeps, just his lack of effort and bad attitude. I was by no means surprised to hear what happened, but I'm really glad it's settled now.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:08:17 2015 No.8139838

>>8139785
>Is it weird for SO to attend too
Not at all. We have plenty of lolitas who bring their SO to events and meet ups. The only joke I can make about bringing your SO is that they will be the designated photographer for group photos. We are very active with multiple meetups throughout the month, but the monthly meet is always a safe choice since no commitment is required (most events require a deposit up front to reserve a spot). While meet ups aren't for everyone I highly encourage you to try to come to at least one. You can request a FB invite and post on the event that you're new - if we go to the same meetup I'd be more than happy to accompany you and introduce you to the group.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:21:32 2015 No.8139857 >>8139838 >We have plenty of lolitas who bring their SO to events and meet ups That sounds like a shit idea? I mean unless the meetups are incredibly casual and don't even have a dress code.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:23:26 2015 No.8139861 >>8139857 Why is it a shit idea?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:27:38 2015 No.8139868 >>8139861 Not that anon, but unless your SO is dressed up as well, it makes no sense for them for go to a meetup for lolitas. It's a lolita meetup, not a lolita and normalfag SO meetup.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:29:19 2015 No.8139871

>>8139861
Because the guys aren't interested in the fashion, don't dress in the fashion and apparently are just there to take pictures? Kind of the equivalent of bringing your gf to a dungeons & dragons session.
Though as I said it depends on how fancy or casual your meets are.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:30:26 2015 No.8139873

>>8139857
>>8139868
I know some lolitas are really against it, and some are more open to the idea. I can understand both sides, but I feel like an asshole if I just make my SO drive me to the meet and leave when it's pretty far (+ have to pay toll). Also, I find having him around really helps me (and the group too, I guess) deter creepers when I am alone (walking to/from the meet location and so forth).

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:35:18 2015 No.8139879

>>8139868
>>8139871
I guess our comm is more accepting of lolitas bringing their boyfriends and since I haven't heard of any objections I don't find it strange. I've noticed that most lolitas are shy and struggle with conversing with strangers they've never met before so they feel more at ease by having someone they know around.

Apologies if I'm putting my foot in my mouth and assuming for other lolitas who bring their boyfriends to meetups

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:40:27 2015 No.8139894

speaking of normalfags, how do you enforce the rule without coming off at elitist or being a mega bitch? we've had an influx of lolitas bringing their normal fag friends and we were okay with it because they were interested in the fashion and wanted to get to know more about it (I was opposed because being a lolita doesn't mean you have to be in a fucking comm). well... several meets later, they're still showing up to tea parties in fucking jeans but nobody is saying anything because we didn't quite plan it through or give them a 'deadline' to when this..... lolita trial thing would end.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:41:39 2015 No.8139898 >>8139894 >enforce the rule of wearing only lolita to meetups forgot to be specific

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:43:32 2015 No.8139904 >>8139894 Heh, that's what I was thinking when I said it's a bad idea. If your meetup is a pub or sushi bar or something casual it might work but for fancy teaparties leave the guys at home if they can't bother to dress at least aristocrat.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:46:01 2015 No.8139917

>>8139078
That seems pretty typical. My local comm has 200, but never has meets with more than 20 people. Most are the same 6-8 people, plus one or two newbies. Another neighbouring comm has 60 and usually gets 5 or so at meets. Another has 40 but is relatively new so gets 6-ish at meets. Another has 100 and yet only has 5 regulars, usually only 2 or 3 of which show up to meets unless it's ILD. Usually, the older a comm is the more inactive members it'll have, (or people that used to be in the comm but moved away but didn't leave the Facebook page because they visit their grandma in the area twice a year and sometimes it coincides with meetups. Or something. For example, I'm UN three comms for cities within reach of my hometown, one comm for my uni city and one for a slightly bigger city a train ride away from my uni city.) Also, some comms cover a large area - even if it's a city comm not a regional comm, people within a 30-50 mile radius might join but then find attending small meets isn't worth the travel time and therefore only show up on ILD.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:54:28 2015 No.8139937 >>8139251 I like Leeds, not been to Sheffield or York but a lot of the Leeds members are in all three comms so they're probably nice too.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 14:54:55 2015 No.8139938 >>8139861 I get mad because if it's a lolita meetup with reservations and deposits, it takes up spots for ACTUAL lolitas who want to go.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:02:14 2015 No.8139958

>>8139323
When I started out, I had two full outfits. Everyone seemed to like me, my coords were good, I went to two meetups and then freaked out because I didn't have anything to wear to the next meet up (one outfit was gothic and the other sweet and they couldn't be mixed and matched at all). I ended up not going to any meetups for like six months until I could afford another big order, which in hindsight I kind of regret. Yes, when you're saving up for more lolita you'll have more money if you don't waste money on meetups, but I could have gone to one or two without most of the people at the meet even noticing I repeated. Once I actually started attending meetups I realised that any meet up labelled casual (once every couple of months) would have 50% of the attendees not in lolita anyway, and I missed out on a lot of opportunities to get to know the comm better.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:06:00 2015 No.8139963

>>8139345
Manchester is the new NW comm but IDK how safe it is to attend. NW closed down from drama and then reopened with a new name, CLAM (Cumbria, Lancashire and Manchester I think?) and the worst dramacows kicked out but two people who had been posted to BtB in the height of the drama still regularly attending meets. It's supposed to be drama free now so you could try it, but I wouldn't make it your main comm.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:06:58 2015 No.8139964 >>8139879 >struggle with conversing with strangers they've never met That goes both ways. It's fucking awkward as hell having to make small talk with some random girl's SO.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:09:17 2015 No.8139971

>>8139377
The problem I have with the "Just buy boring nonprint brand pieces!" argument is that if a design's that simple I can probably make it myself, to fit me perfectly, for cheaper (although it wouldn't have the same resale value). Besides which, super plain stuff is no good for meets and most of us aren't lifestylers. If I'm gonna buy brand, I want prints.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:11:01 2015 No.8139977 >>8139971 >for cheaper hahaha.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:14:57 2015 No.8139990 >>8139964 i know what you mean. I guess it helps there are a few SO attending my local meets normally, so they can kind of mingle in the corner and commiserate together. plus creeps don't hassle us when they see a group of big dudes nearby.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:17:06 2015 No.8139996 >>8139990 >the lolita SO comm meetup lel i like this idea

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:18:23 2015 No.8140000 >>8139345 Search Midlands lolitas on Facebook and join the group

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:20:34 2015 No.8140005

>>8139735
Seconding the lactose intolerance thing. I'm lactose intolerant and I don't ask for special food because it's an intolerance not an allergy so one milk tea and a slice of pizza or one cheese sandwich won't kill me (can't drink milkshake tho), but if I go to a meet and those are the only veggie options I can't eat much.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:27:22 2015 No.8140026

>>8139904
Sounds odd, but I don't really like the way most guys look in aristocrat or ouji. I think it's much cuter on girls. Whether a guy's in aristocrat or normalfag clothing makes no difference to me at most meetups.

In fact, guys in normalfag suits (with optional fedora) are my least favourite meet up guy outfit option. I'd rather casual clothes than that, even to a fancy event, because office suits don't match lolita anyway.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:30:49 2015 No.8140040 >>8139977 $40 JSK/something with a lot of lace no, $40 skirt or a piece decorated only with ruffles yes.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:30:57 2015 No.8140042 >>8140026 I'd much rather see a guy who tried to dress nicely rather than one who just threw on some cruddy jeans and a tee shirt.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:33:49 2015 No.8140047 >>8140026 I tried to think of alternative male meet up clothing options, and now I actually think the idea of a fairy kei guy + sweet lolita girl couple would be adorable.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:35:56 2015 No.8140053 >>8140047 Guys aren't dress-up accessories.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:37:56 2015 No.8140056 >>8140042 >>8140047 >>8140053 i wish my bf would dress up, even just dress nicely. but no he's just not into that stuff and i won't force him. but man, it would be cute to have matching couple coordinates.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:39:37 2015 No.8140062

>>8140042
I was visualising more "chinos and a jumper" normalfag boy clothes than "baggy jeans and a sweatshirt that's been through the wash a few too many times". If the latter were showing up to meetups that'd be annoying, but most guys I know would wear the former to a formal-ish occasion. My perspective might be skewed because I hang out with a lot of gay guys, but I think most girls would have the sense to ask their boyfriends to dress like a smartish normalfag.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:44:29 2015 No.8140073 >>8140026 Aristocrat isn't a cute fashion. It looks good on guys. Ouji is a whole nother story.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:44:47 2015 No.8140076

>>8140062
Yeah, my SO doesn't come to many meets, but when he does, he'll wear nice fitted jeans and a button-down shirt. It's casual, but not slobby. On the even rarer occasions that he comes to a tea meetup, he wears neo-Victorian/borderline Steampunk. (Aristo doesn't really work for him, he's a bearded burly dude.)

I agree that nice casual is probably best, unless it's a really formal meet. But at a more formal meetup, only guys that are interested in dressing up would typically bother to attend (at least in my comm that's the case) so you don't see much conflict.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:48:45 2015 No.8140082 >>8140073 +1 Accurate Victorian men's clothes or romanticism stuff would also be acceptable.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:52:10 2015 No.8140093

>>8140076
>I agree that nice casual is probably best, unless it's a really formal meet. But at a more formal meetup, only guys that are interested in dressing up would typically bother to attend (at least in my comm that's the case) so you don't see much conflict.
Sounds like a good way of sorting things out, I totally agree. In my area, large formal events are ticketed and expensive so girls that usually bring their normalfag SO to meetups find it cheaper and easier just to have them browse around town/go to the cinema/meet up with other friends.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 15:53:19 2015 No.8140096 >>8140082 *romantigoth not romanticism

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 16:18:13 2015 No.8140146 >>8139251 London, Leeds, Sheffield, Brighton

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 16:23:37 2015 No.8140159 >>8140146 Oops I meant Bristol

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:07:03 2015 No.8140244 >>8140146 I didn't know Sheffield and Brighton had comms.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:30:42 2015 No.8140296 >>8140244 Brighton has a general Jfashion comm and Sheffield has a small lolita one

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:36:55 2015 No.8140320 >>8140296 I am currently abroad in Brighton and brought 1 coord with me and I want to wear it so bad. Idk where to find fellow lolitas. Do you think I should post to tea party, do a london meet?any help would be nice.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:49:12 2015 No.8140350 >>8140320 Post to the TPC and some of the Brighton girls should comment. There are a few london meets too that you can join

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:49:35 2015 No.8140352

>>8139894
This happened to us too, and I had to put my foot down and hosted my own meetups. When the same lolitas would try to bring their +1s, I would ask who they are bringing; if it's a repeat normalfag offender I would let them know that if their friend is more than happy to come along once they're finally a lolita.

>Hey Anon! Can I put a +1?
Sure thing, Anon #2! May I know who so I can give them an invite?
>Oh, it's my Anonfriend.
Oh yeah, I've met Anonfriend. Has she finally gotten her first coordinate?
>No
Well I'd be more than happy to invite Anonfriend when she finally does!

>Hey Anon, I'd like to reserve a spot with a +1.
Sure thing, who's your +1?
>My boyfriend
Unfortunately lolitas get priority. Does your boyfriend dress up in lolita as well?
>No
I'd like to have the meetup only open to lolitas at this time. There are plenty of other events that are more open to a wider audience but since I am hosting this event, I'd like to enforce the lolita in the lolita meetup.

Usually that gets a few snarky comments but they're usually too immature to deal with anyways and send their deposit anyway. If these lolitas are okay with normalfags and their boyfriends coming along make your own meetups

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:52:48 2015 No.8140362 >>8140352 Holy shit, I can't type today. I meant to say that they're too immature and wouldn't put a deposit lol

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 17:56:28 2015 No.8140376 >>8140352 This is brilliant Anon! I usually don't mind boyfriends at bigger meet ups or meet ups that don't require any member restrictions (like restaurants etc do), but this surely is a good idea.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 18:06:33 2015 No.8140393 Can anyone tell me what the HLC is like? I'm new to 4chan and Houston, so I know nothing about it. Are there a lot of itas? Are the members fun? Are the meetups boring?

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 18:18:14 2015 No.8140419

>>8140352
>>8140376
Our comm doesn't mind boyfriends because they're generally conscientious enough to put a bit of effort into their appearance when they do come, and they tend to get into activities/help out with stuff.

The normalfag friend thing has only happened once or twice, so we don't have a rule about it. Plus, some of our older members have dropped lolita, but still are friends with people, so they sometimes swing by wearing non-lolita outfits (not necessarily jeans and tees, but other jstyles or vintage stuff).

TL;DR: I guess it varies from comm to comm how obnoxious that sort of thing becomes.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 18:27:57 2015 No.8140440

>>8140419
tbh i only mind when someone's bf is really creepy or douchey, which happens too often. the girls in my comm made it a rule not to have SOs at regular meets because it was an ongoing problem. though they like my bf enough to invite him to our smaller outings, which is really sweet.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 19:51:11 2015 No.8140636 >>8139046 We actually thought the girl who was insulting us was a different girl who calls herself asian and does her makeup to look asian when she's very hispanic.

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 20:07:55 2015 No.8140674

>>8139971
A good number of people don't feel that way and are sick of the print hype, though. I have a good mix of print and non-print in my closet, and if anything, I feel like my non-print outfits get more compliments/comments at meets/online than my print ones.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 20:09:45 2015 No.8140682 File: 99 KB, 459x350, youstupidshit.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>8139971 >>8140040 >thinking most non-prints are plain look at this little newfag babby.

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 20:27:30 2015 No.8140739 >>8140053 Like they care?

>>	Anonymous Mon Feb 23 23:52:15 2015 No.8141274 >>8139705 thanks, super cute

Anonymous Mon Feb 23 23:52:34 2015 No.8141277

>>8140352
Genius idea!

I've hosted meets where SO's were allowed to attend and what ends up happening is that all the single lolitas don't want to come anymore. if we are literally going to romp around town and shop/take pics/whatever, why bring a normfag BF or GF? One girl brought her anime, obvious cosplay wig wearing friend to a small meetup! I usually only bring my SO if the event is large enough that it wont be awkward and interesting enough for them to attend. Plus some of these dudes are there just to feel like pimps or something. majorly creepy!

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 00:15:57 2015 No.8141352 >>8140352 i'm going to take this idea from you... my comm is half cosplay/weeaboos and half lolita. i hate it

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 09:40:10 2015 No.8141970 >>8140682 I specified boring nonprint. Non-boring nonprint is expensive to make yourself because of the amount of lace and detailing, but stuff like that goes for above $40 anyway.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 16:17:11 2015 No.8142582 anyone know if the DC comm is ok? thinking about joining.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 19:07:29 2015 No.8142973 >>8139727 I knew what you were saying, anon. I don't know why the lolis took it so literally.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 19:12:03 2015 No.8142982 Speaking of boyfriends, is anywhere here in the portland group? What is their opinion on bringing +1s?

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 19:12:30 2015 No.8142984 >>8139996 I like this, too. A lot more than I should. "Boyfriend, hurry up and get ready! Your normalfag meetup is today, too!"

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 19:28:19 2015 No.8143010 >>8142982 As long as he's not a douche or super socially awkward (to the point of making others uncomfortable) then there usually isn't a huge problem.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 19:54:21 2015 No.8143055 Possibly moving to either Seattle or Portland. Deets on those two comms?

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 20:17:06 2015 No.8143102 >>8142984 Made me laugh. It's definitely more awkward when there's one guy at a meetup than when there's three or four and they can congregate together.

Anonymous Tue Feb 24 22:33:03 2015 No.8143378

>>8143055
Portland is a vague clusterfuck. It seems like there's a huge increase in underage weebs and 30+-year-old obese women lately, along with bizarre issues about people hosting "private meets" (aka hanging out with their friends), two groups within the group constantly fighting each other over stupid shit, attention whores who have awful outfits, and then normal girls who wear normal lolita coordinates.

Basically there's a lot of crazies but if you find the right girls you'll be fine.

>>	Anonymous Tue Feb 24 23:44:04 2015 No.8143500 >tfw you made a snippy comment to someone on rufflechat and they got huffy >tfw you didnt realize that person is one of the prominent members in your local comm well that's okay i guess im cool with remaining a lonelita...

Anonymous Wed Feb 25 00:15:51 2015 No.8143580

>>8139046
>>8138590
Have all the fun you want, you look cute, but for the love of God, irregardless of who's where or who'll see, wear a petti. You have a really nice butt, but for you to dress that well and not have an essential piece kinda makes me cringe.

Anonymous Wed Feb 25 00:36:25 2015 No.8143626
File: 1.60 MB, 3264x1836, 20150220_200105.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8143580
Im actually wearing a hoopskirt with a petti on top to get a nice cupcake shape. It gets pretty hot here and wearing layers of pettis easily gets sweaty quickly (plus no worries of deflation). I do need to invest in a pair of bloomers though! I'll throw some in my next bodyline order.

(Pic related, view of how the hoopskirt petti combo looks normally)

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 25 01:01:25 2015 No.8143664 >>8143626 I love your butt. But yeah, you need to buy some bloomers. Find some indie brands that sell good bloomers, not creepy Mr. Yan.

Anonymous Wed Feb 25 03:33:21 2015 No.8143951
File: 888 KB, 400x252, 1424308764639.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>8139352
>>8139963
>>8140000

Thank you for the warning! I'll stay clear of Manchester, I'm still very new and I don't fancy diving right into drama-ville (or ex-drama-ville).

Ta again all, off to look up the Midlands one now.

Anonymous Wed Feb 25 06:14:23 2015 No.8144163

>>8143951
Oh, also, since I said upthread that they seemed to be getting over the drama, I feel like I ought to retract that statement a bit...

The current first post of the ita thread in the catalogue is Manchester, despite the fact the outfits in it (apart from the pompom shoes) are nitpick at worst. So someone in the new comm, with access to pictures posted on the comm Facebook, still has a vendetta.

tl;dr if you go to a meet with them and you're in any of the group photos, there's a fairly high chance your picture will end up on 4chan even if your outfit is fine.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 25 10:33:55 2015 No.8144448 >>8140393 There's some nice people in the area, but HLC is just headed by shady, fake, and probably crazy characters. Don't fuck with them or AM and you'll be fine.

>>	Anonymous Wed Feb 25 12:28:11 2015 No.8144593 >>8143580 >irregardless unless english isn't your native tongue, there's no fucking excuse for this.

Anonymous Wed Feb 25 18:29:20 2015 No.8145506

>>8117737
Yeah, my comm gets flakes too. It usually ends up being the same 2-3 people including myself which is manageable, but it could be more fun. The most I've seen at once is probably 8 people total. I know that a lot of people live far away from each other and we've had an influx of younger girls, but I hope it gets better. I'm considering on hosting a large scaled meet to try to get many people to come. I'm likely to host it in July (since I may be out of state for actual summer lolita day). Would it be too soon to announce it?

>>8143055
Hey, me too! (well, hopefully, in a year)

I believe that there's a more private lolita group reserved for people who've attended at least 3 meet ups which is a really good idea considering how huge their comm is and it easily weeds out casual admirers/creepers/4ever itas, etc.

>normal girls who wear normal lolita coordinates.

I hope I get lumped into that group.

Anonymous Thu Feb 26 20:00:42 2015 No.8148567

This is a really nooby question, but how is wearing the same/similar coords to multiple meets viewed? I've just started building my wardrobe so I don't have a lot to work with, but I'm worried it'll be viewed as tacky if I keep showing up in the same clothes for each meet.

>>	Anonymous Thu Feb 26 21:27:38 2015 No.8148775 >>8148567 In most comms, no one will care if you wear the same dress multiple times. Just keep the coord fresh with different accessories, hair styles, etc.

Anonymous Thu Feb 26 21:54:30 2015 No.8148860

>>8143055
I wish I could say >>8143378 wasn't true but yeah, it's gotten kind of crazy lately.

But all that being said there are a lot of really awesome and well-dressed people in the comm. You just have to come to a meet up to see because that group isn't the most active in the comm online.

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/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL