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/cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL

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8528355 No.8528355 [Reply] [Original] [rbt]

Several years ago, I accidently stumbled upon the fashion and philosophy of my dreams. I was always a romantic person with a head full of fairytale-like thoughts, so it was love at first sight. I would spend my time before bed every night checking blogs updates, pining over beautiful clothes, and envisioning my life dappled in dewdrops and star shine and sweetened with honey. I was rarely able to wear the clothes, but that didn’t matter to me because I still had the lifestyle even if I couldn’t wear my dresses. It was everything I could have asked for.

Fast forward to now, and I find myself falling out of love with Lolita. The clothes look different now, people have stopped blogging, EGL is dead, and the lifestyle ideals are forgotten. I found part of the problem was that the style had changed so much from what I liked about it originally. I changed my wardrobe to an older look, and it helped, but something was still missing. I now realize that the lifestyle meant so much to me that without it, my love for the clothes suffers. Yet I can’t seem to get myself living such a romantic and fairy tale inspired way of life again. Without the inspiration from lifestyle blogs and everyone’s romantic culture musings to guide me, and having gotten older and having more responsibilities, I find that I feel silly and think maybe I don’t have time for self-indulgence and refinement anymore. I’m at a loss.

Is it time for me to move on from the fashion, or should I keep trying to start living the lifestyle again? Is there anyone who feels the same? Do you want to see a revival in the lifestyle aspect? Do you feel Lolita is truly a subculture without its own lifestyle ideals to guide the people in it? Were there any bloggers who inspired you, or any posts on EGL that stuck with you? Any memories of the past you would like to share?

>> No.8528375
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Of course I would love to see a lifestyle revival, I feel like it was an important part of the fashion. It's also something I personally enjoy and miss. Lolita used to feel more personal and, to quote someone else from another thread "sentimental."

Another quite from another thread:
"I think the lifestyle aspect is half the charm of the fashion, and people who think that a girl trying to make herself a little more refined and who has feminine and old fashioned interests is a freak are the same people who are gonna thing the clothes are freaky too. I honestly think people who think the fashion is weird or perverted might be more accepting of the clothes if people kept the lifestyle and explained it was about trying to bring back some old fashioned charm in the modern world."

I was heavily inspired by Princess Portal and Lolita Charm back in the day. They both had some very inspirational and cute writings. I miss them dearly. They inspired me to not be afraid to enjoy the things I felt silly for enjoying.

I miss older style Lolita in general, and I also miss the photo shoots of Lolitas "in their natural surroundings" versus the endless mirror shorts and basic cute poses we see these days. I'd like to see a revival of "less daily shots, more artistic shoots" as well.

>> No.8528384
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I feel the same, especially now that I'm able to wear the fashion it all feels different. However, I try to focus on the moment I feel happiest, when I first put on the dress with a poofy petticoat, no make-up or hairstyle done yet, and I just sit in my bedroom and look at my books and flowers and all the little things I've done to make my life that bit sweeter. That moment makes it worth it to me, so I haven't felt like giving up yet.

I think you should continue to try and live the lifestyle again! It's a constant effort now that we've grown up, but one that I think is possible if you set aside how other people will think of you and whatnot. The thing that has always inspired me the most since the days that I could only google 'lolita' and get kamikaze girl screenshots, has been Novala's poems, specifically this part:

'Loafers could never become maidens.
Sew frills onto the hem of your heart!
Put a tiara on top of your soul!
Have pride.'

That said, I would really love a revival of the lifestyle aspect! I have always considered lolita a subculture, I feel like it shifting into 'just a fashion' is only here in the west, as a defense against accusations and the like. I've been trying to start my own lifestyle-y blog, but I have multiple fashion interests outside of lolita, especially now that it's changed a lot, so I talk about those also (if not more at the moment). I encourage you to try it out yourself though!

>> No.8528388

I tried to get into the fashion, but now I've found myself just living the lifestyle. My room is filled with classic and victorian inspired knick-knacks and I cannot stop.

>> No.8528444
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Personally, I love classical music, been taking ballet classes since I was four, been taking singing/opera lessons, piano lessons, and now I'm going to study art history. My love for classic ballet is probably what made me fall for the fashion.
But in my comm, the girls are talking about j-pop, they drink bubble tea instead of actual tea, and would rather have meetups at fast food restaurants.
Of course, people are allowed to enjoy whatever they like, but if not even the lolitas cherish the old fashioned hobbies and arts, where am I going to find any like that?

(I do have friends who are into classical music or ballet, but not who are into lolita fashion)

>> No.8528488

I believe that bubble tea and j-pop can be a part of the Lolita lifestyle too. I think there are many sides to the lifestyle.

From another thread:
I define lifestyler as trying to make as many things as you can fit the aesthetic that you're going for, or doing things that make you feel more connected to the fashion. It's something that's different for everyone, but there's a common theme of old fashioned quaintness and femininity and most people try to add touches to match it to their décor and their out-of-Lolita style. Often, what influences a person to wear lolita influences their lifestyle also. There's also a focus on self refinement and appreciating simple things. A lot of people think lifestyle is being fake, but it's not about forcing yourself to be who you aren't, but rather letting your more quaint or beautiful interests shine through. It isn't about limiting yourself to what you can do either, which is another misconception. There's a lot of interests and hobbies people might not even associate with Lolita that would still tie in with the lifestyle ideal perfectly, it's such a broad idea. If I had to describe it in one phrase, I would say it's about "living artfully and beautifully."

J-pop and rock has actually been a staple in the Lolita community since the beginning, but so has more classic sounding music as well. I also think bubble tea is a good alternative for people who don't like regular tea, though I'd encourage everyone to give regular tea a try, there's so many kinds that a person is bound to find one they like.

What I'm trying to say is, there's a lot of different sides to the lifestyle, and they are all connected, even if they seem different. I'm sure that more of those girls have an interest in the classic things than you think, but with things like ballet and singing and playing instruments, they are difficult for the average person with no experience to just jump into or discuss.

>> No.8528505

Are you me?
I love the fine arts as well, my favorite things to do are listening to classical music and reading old books. I felt in love with lolita because it makes me feel like I'm the XVIII century, but no one else in my comm has interest in being a lady, they're just a bunch of weabos.

>> No.8528521

If there's not already a Lifestyle Lolita Facebokk page, there should be. I would make one myself but I'm very bad at keeping up with things, especially social media. I'd love to join and discuss though!

>> No.8528530


I'm >>8528488, but I want to add that I do know how you guys feel. I've always been in love with old fashioned things, and I really enjoy exploring older and charming hobbies and interests. I got into Lolita from the lifestyle aspect, and loved period clothing and books and classic music. Lolita reminded me of fairy tales and old stories, and that's what has inspired my style and what I probably love about the fashion the most.

I know not everyone has an interest in those sorts of things or the lifestyle, and again there are several sides to the lifestyle as a whole, but I do wish that more people were interested in it and that Lolita was seen as less "Japanese" and more "quaintrelle" these days.

>> No.8528631

Maybe someone could make a post about this topic on EGL? I know it's pretty dead, but there's still people who lurk and old lolitas who check it from time to time. Maybe it would get some discussion out there on a broader scale, or at the very least get a few people inspired and remind them of the older days.

>> No.8529498

The fashion has changed and so has the lifestyle that "goes" with it.

The fashion used to be about looking like dolls, drawing from period fashion etc and the old lifestyle matched it.

Now its very...Japanese. And the lifestyle that goes with it is that of someone who's in to anime, listens to jpop and visits cons often etc

>> No.8529568

I'm gonna agree.

I came to lolita because my lifestyle matched it. I've always had problems with the term "lifestyle lolita" because it implies my lifestyle matches my clothes instead of the other way around. Most "lifestyle Lolitas" of the Good old days where the same.

I feel that as the fashion gets more costume-ish and Japanese, it attracts people who are into all things Japanese and into costuming etc.

@ OP

I don't mean to sound harsh, It's sad that you are feeling so uninspired but my advice is to but try not to rely so heavily on others.

>> No.8529576

why don't you make the post?

>> No.8529608

I don't have a LJ.

>> No.8529610

so make one

>> No.8529613

Wow, I'm sorry for whatever put you in a mood today.

>> No.8529616
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>> No.8529735

reading a bit much into a few words anon

>> No.8529764
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I think you're right. It's not that the lifestyle is dead, but rather that it's changed as the style of the clothes did. Things change of course, but it's sad that it's not what I truly love anymore.

I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand, I think it would be great if there was a different word to describe the lifestyle concept while still keeping it separate from the fashion. On the other hand, I really do feel like the lifestyle aspect is vital to making it a "subculture" and not just a fashion trend (just to clarify I am well aware not everyone has the same interests and that you can wear the clothes without being a apart of the culture). I never thought I relied very much on others, but maybe you're right, because I wouldn't be so uninspired otherwise.

Novala's poems were always inspiring, though most of them would be crazy if interpreted literally, the imagery they produced was wonderful and I do think there were words of wisdom in some of them. I also really liked this quote from Arika Takarano:

"Gothic and Lolita clothes are a maiden’s armor, which even a knight’s armor cannot compare to. A maiden’s lace is her steel. Her ribbons are chains. Her dress hat is her helmet, and she surreptitiously changes the blood that flows from her wounds into true red rose petals. Thus, the maiden fights. After all, to live is to fight, and to become beautiful is to become stronger."

I've always wanted to blog, but I don't want attention and I'm rather shy. I think I will keep trying to stick with Lolita though, and the lifestyle too. I'm not sure why it's so hard to get back into when I've always enjoyed those same things. Maybe I've just forgotten how to self indulge, or maybe I really am relying too much on others. I'm interested in many different styles outside of Lolita too, but Lolita is the only one that has ever made me feel like magic is real and that my quaint and old-fashioned interests aren't weird.

>> No.8530204
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>> No.8530254

I really want to get into lifestyle again, but I have to be a bit punk rock to get a job in my field that isn't just cutting soccer mom bobs or perming old ladies.

>> No.8530262

What aspects about the lifestyle do you like most? If it's about acting refined/kind I don't think it should interfere with being "punk rock", you can be kind and still spunky! like a cool older sister.

If you're a gothic lolita then it would be easier, I think.

>> No.8530357

I'm a classic lolita, but my mentor literally wears suit jackets without a shirt and one of the big things in the industry is that you have to change your aesthetic to fit the place you work at. I love his salon to death and want to work there as soon as I can, but it feels somewhat fake to live a lolita lifestyle behind everyone's back. I'm not the right personality type to work a classic upscale salon, so if I want to enjoy my job in the extremely limited market in my state it has to be punk or nothing.

>> No.8530590

i want to blog again but i dont want attention on me
i dont know how id run an anon blog
but i still want shots of my coords and stuff
maybe i just wont show myself
i like blogging and writing more recently.

>> No.8530634

Does anyone feel like if there was more lifestyle in lolita, it'd be a little less... salty, I suppose? I don't mind it since it's a fashion style and it's always fun to gossip, but I feel like lolita has really lost it's heart recently. Maybe it's because of the influx of tumblr feelz and snowflakey shit that's made everyone more prickly, but I think lifestyle is really important to lolita.
I don't think anyone wants to wear frilly clothes for no reason. It's usually something fuzzy and can be downright trivial or silly deep down, but I really like hearing people reveal it.

That being said, why are you really a lolita? What does it truly mean to you?

>> No.8530855
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Lolita is pretty punk rock, you know.
I don't know why you would feel fake for indulging in one side of yourself when you aren't at your job. People have multiple interests. I am a Lolita and my personality and interests align perfectly with the old lifestyle ideals, but I also have interests and things that don't fit. That doesn't make me less of a Lolita. The lifestyle just about putting a priority on what you think is beautiful and trying to be a more charming, polite, and knowledgeable person.

I'm a Lolita because the first dress I seen was the first time in my life I felt like a dress was made for me. Because the lifestyle let me feel like my interests and softness wasn't something to be made fun of or feel weird about, but celebrated and enjoyed instead. I'm a romantic person who believed that life is beautiful and I want to enjoy that as much as I can. Lolita helps me to do that. The clothes and the old blogs I used to read were lighthouses in the dark when I felt lost and needed help to find my way again.

Lolita to me means that softness is not a weakness. It means magic and fairy tales and making them real and believing. It's connecting with my ancestors and women from times gone by. It's being able to live with wealth, even though I am not rich with money. It gives me wealth in the form of experience, smiles, and beautiful things.

I feel foolish for taking the time to be so open and writing so much on cgl of all places, but I don't have a blog or another place to share my feelings. I don't even have friends I can share them with. Truthfully, I only came to cgl out of desperation to find some much needed inspiration, this really isn't my cup of tea. But it is nice to know that there are a few people out there still interested in the old lifestyle things. I miss the "heart" of Lolita. I don't believe anyone comes to a fashion that's so inspired by pure femininity and old fashioned things and storybooks for no reason, either.

>> No.8530873

Definitely go for it! Even if you're not showing yourself and relying primarily on your words, it could help inspire others to come out and make their own blogs, too. Be the revolution, anon!

>> No.8530880

Since we all seem to want a lifestyle revival in the community, but are all apparently either too shy or unsure about blogging ourselves, why don't we turn this into a brainstorm/blog inspiration thread?

What sort of topics and discussions would you like to see or write about? I think there's a really wide variety of things that can be done. Blogs with creative writing and poetry that fit with lolita. Lolita lifestyle art blogs. Day-in-the-life diary types. Educational and helpful articles. The possibilities are endless.

>> No.8530883

I would love to write a romantic lifestyle blog or journal type thing, but I just don't think it's for me. I love to talk about that stuff and I don't have any friends with the same interests so it would give me an outlet I don't have, but I'm scared of the possibility of getting attention too. I'm a really shy and sensitive person and I know I wouldn't be able to handle negativity I might get, and not that I think I would be famous but I wouldn't want fame either. I've thought about doing it for years but never go through with it. If the internet wasn't such a mean and angry place, I'd do it, but all the hate and anger I see just turns me right off of it.

>> No.8530918

There's been a couple, but they all end up failing I think. Part of the problem is that there's little to no quality control.

I just had an idea that might solve most of the problems here, though: a group blog/tumblr. People can submit art, articles, etc, even anonymously if they want to, and won't have to worry about gaining too much individual attention. We'd get the perspective of multiple people and there would be admin and mods to control the quality of the submissions that get posted.

>> No.8530953
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Op here again. I'd like to post some excerpts from an article Princess Skye wrote about Lolita Lifestyle.

"In the end there really is no such thing as ‘The Lolita Lifestyle,’ there is no set of rules one must follow, no code of behavior or list of accomplishments. Nothing is required to be lolita, other than to dress as one (and even that is debatable). This said, there is such thing as ‘A Lolita Lifestyle,’ in fact there are many of them, such different lives as lived by lolitas all over the world can be said to each in their own way be a lolita lifestyle. The distinction is very important. The first is definitive and all encompassing, the imaginary ideal that all Lolitas must live a certain way and behave as befits the clothing - this is the false concept and in fact few (perhaps none) who actually aim to live as lolitas believe in this. Only the detractors of this so called ‘Lolita Lifestyle’ seem concerned with its imaginary rules and regulations. The second is oh-so-different, for it is personal and unique to each individual. They create it for themselves and it is simply that which brings them greater enjoyment from Lolita."

"Just as it is unlikely that any lolita should like everything they find in the culture, it is also unlikely that all Lolitas should share the same idea of a ‘lifestyle.’ Each is drawn to this novel, exaggerated yet elegant style for different reasons, though usually they recognize something in all the lace and pin tucks that is already familiar to them. Whether it is a decadence as only found in their favourite period novels and films or a simple love of dressing up and feeling girly and pretty, there are too numerous answers to count for why we wear Lolita fashion. None is more valid than the other and likewise there are numerous ‘lolita lifestyles’ all equally real and valid."

>> No.8530957
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"Most lolitas have a sort of ideal of lolita that is personal to them, it can be anything from a Victorian lady, to a Japanese stage idol, an innocent young maiden to a creepy gothic doll or even none of these things but something completely different that serves as an inspiration. Lolita is almost an excuse, in a way, to explore these ideals. Usually there are existing hobbies and interests, the same ones that attracted us to lolita and these form a part of our lifestyle. Sometimes we are lucky enough to discover new things, learn new skills and make new friends through Lolita and these become part of our life as well."

"One of the greatest criticisms of this lifestyle concept is that it is in some way forced. It should never be forced. Changing your opinions, behaviour and interests in a way that is not natural to your personality and likes is not living the lolita lifestyle, it is conforming to someone elses ideal. There is no on ideal that is right, that should be accepted by all and forced on those who wish to wear the clothing, there is only our own individual inspirations which should be fun to explore and fulfilling to accept as a part of our life.

The Lolita Lifestyle is expressing yourself through and enjoying activities that make you feel Lolita. Whatever that may be. If it’s being playful and childish and going to amusement parks and eating lots of candy, then that is your lolita lifestyle. If it’s sitting in your garden drinking tea and reading Jane Austen, then that is your lolita lifestyle. If it’s going to clubs and seeing the latest bands and joining Visual Kei fanclubs, then that is your lolita lifestyle. Even if it’s just dressing up and hanging out in the mall with your friends and drinking bubble tea and taking purikura, that is still your Lolita Lifestyle. Enjoy it, explore it, define it - don’t let it define you."

>> No.8531042

Sometimes I want to just sit under a tree, listen to soothing classical music, and embroider or something. I just don't want to have to do it alone.

>> No.8531068
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Move to SoCal and join me, that sounds pleasant. I really miss the whole lifestyle concept as well. I got into this fashion because I already had an interest in romanticized Victorian lifestyles - the tea, the crafts, the aesthetic... But no one in my comm seems to have that same dreamy ideal. I'd love to have even one friend to share that with, to sit under a tree and embroider with...

>> No.8531104

Dropping my email in case anyone wants to try being friends. I'm a 26-year-old classic lolita interested in the historical influences and working on leading a more simple and romantic lifestyle.

>> No.8531141


Funny thing is, I used to do lifestyle-type stuff alone all the time and never had a problem with it. I grew up without friends and I was used to being off by myself. It wasn't until after the lifestyle stuff started fading that I really felt alone and wished for other people to share it with. I was fine on my own before, but after getting to experience how nice it was to be able to have some kind of person to share and connect with, even if only online, it's hard to go back to being alone again.

I think maybe that's why I'm lacking inspiration and the ability to continue living romantically these days. It's easier to find that there's a group of people you fit in with than it is to find you no longer fit in with a group of people.

>> No.8531148
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I almost feel like I'm responding to a personal ad, heehee! But I'll drop you a line! Let's be friends ...

>> No.8531154

If I try making a Facebook group would people be interested in joining? We can post inspirational things, outfits, general chat topics, etc.? I don't want to make one if no one joins, but I think it would be nice to continue this somewhere more permanent...

>> No.8531162

Heh, figured I should give a bit more info to see if people wanted to get to know me.

I don't use facebook at all anymore, and as mentioned above, lifestlye fb groups tend not to last long.

>> No.8531235

I agree with >>8531162 for the most part but I think it would be a good way to meet and make online pen pal arrangements if nothing else. I really want to get back to that idea of lifestyle as I originally imagined it.

I got into the fashion at the height of the lifestyle debacle and watched it slowly fade from interest. It's a special sort of nostalgia for me; I got into it right as I moved to a new state and it helped me learn how to be alone without being lonely. I think the idea of the quaint romantic lifestyle is still my ideal but I've also accepted that I have to adapt my style to fit my life, not adapt my life to fit my style like escapism.
I can't wear frilly dresses to sit at a sewing machine at work for six hours but I can come home to a room of pretty things and lounge in cute roomwear, and that's how I'm approaching finally making my lifestyle a reality.

>> No.8531269

>writing and poetry that fit with lolita
Yes. I would love to see some more poetry like Takemoto Novala's.

>> No.8531342

Yes! I like that mentality...

>> No.8531400

anon. please make this. i would follow in a heartbeat.

>> No.8531409

The "adapting my style to fit my life" thing is something I've been working on for a while now. Lolita is hard for me to wear, I don't have a lot of money to spend on it, and I'm not able to wear it often, and finally one day I decided I had enough of not wearing the clothes I loved and I started working on making it work for me. Sometimes I wear my Lolita clothes in a way that isn't strict Lolita, and I've started to focus on other styles of clothing too that still have a romantic, dreamy feeling but are more casual. I think that's why I love the lifestyle so much, I can still live a romantic and quaint type of life even if I can't always wear the clothes.

>> No.8531435

It's a pretty big commitment, but I'd be willing if there's enough people interested in submitting and modding. Anyway we can get a count-off of how many people there actually are in this thread?

Agreed! It really is a shame that there aren't any really good alternatives to "lolita lifestyle" since it definitely goes beyond lolita. I know there's quaintrelle, but not sure if people actually like that. If I do end up making the group tumblr thing a reality, I was thinking about calling it something like "Life Romantic"

>> No.8531439

I like this idea, but I'm not sure how well it would turn out and if it would get enough participation. Maybe if it gets posted to a few different Lolita sites, the word will get out and help get more people watching and posting.

I like the idea of having a little place for people to submit their lifestyle musings, recipes, photo-shoots, artwork and poems and such for sure, just would be worried about it not panning out.

It seems that these days, anytime someone tries to make a new Lolita group, blog, or whatever, it never lasts. It's sad. I blame Facebook, because people started to migrate there and then things became shorter, quicker and impersonal.

>> No.8531521

That's a big part of what makes it such a huge commitment. If I decide to go ahead and start it, I would be in charge of generating content when there are no contributors as well as promoting and trying to generate interest. Not sure if I'm up to the task or not, tbh, but it's something that I'd love to see exist, and if that means doing it myself, I may have to.

>> No.8531532

I definitely would love to be apart of this, helping mod or whatever you need... my tumblr account is inspirikki.tumblr.com if you wanna message me there if/when you start somethin...

>> No.8531555

i would be

>> No.8531580

I kinda just went for it gulls and made a blog, I'd be grateful if anyone wanted to admin it with me?
I've just done a few test post's so don't judge it so far, and sorry about the shitty layout.
I'd appreciate any feedback and suggestions anyway.


>> No.8531718

I'm flattered that the description of lifestyle you used was a quote I wrote!

I don't think that wikihow aryticle is very good though... Maybe instead you could link something like http://www.parfaitdoll.com/2009/09/so-you-think-you-want-to-be-a-lifestyle-lolita.html

>> No.8531726

Not feeling the theme's awkward scrolling, but really, really loving it otherwise. If you're still looking for an admin buddy I'd be interested.

>> No.8531735

I agree, it's too hard to read and see the pictures because the top banner doesn't move. Maybe either make it smaller or make it scroll with the page so it's easier to see.

>> No.8531748

It's a lovely description and I couldn't have picked a better one.
And yeah sorry I just shoved that in randomly so I could test if the tag system worked or not!

Anon if your interested in joining send in an ask with your email you signed up to tumblr with so I can add you as a member, it's the only way I can think of safely adding you?

I'll look to change the theme a bit more, thanks!

>> No.8531776

Like the others have said, I'm not digging the theme, it's sort of confusing.

I'd love to see original content and mostly DIY, since I feel it's a big part of the lifestyle. Also cute "housewife" things, like cute recipes for sweets, tea, how to decor your room, bed etc.

I am really into the sweet and innocent side of the lifestyle. I loved those girls who were either Hime lolitas or Hime Gyaru who had those blogs with little costumizable pixel dolls, and whimsical instrumental music playing, where you would go to read tutorials on how they would decorate everything with lace and ribbons, and see pictures of their vanity table with lots of old perfume bottles... It makes me so nostalgic.

>> No.8532217

Thanks for stepping up, anon! I'm really excited and kind of relieved I won't be the one actually running it I'd still like to join and help out, though. I'm not near my computer, but I'll definitely send something when I can.

>> No.8532295

dropping my email in case someone needs or wants help

>> No.8533026

dont we admins need a way to communicate with each other? we can do it through tumblr messenger, right?
also what kind of posts are allowed?

>> No.8533113

I changed the theme to a more simple and forever scrolling thing, tell me what you guys think? If it doesn't work or if something is off!

I used your email to add you as a member so hopefully you should get that soon.

Yeah I think that should work, and I'm thinking things that are DIY, pictures of our own spaces, lists of ideas of things to do, artwork, items that people could find useful (like a cute tablecloth or something idk), even little cute poems or quotes maybe.

I think it's just about getting the aesthetic of it.
The only thing I'm worried about is over catering to the classic lolita life and leaving out gothic and sweet themes?

>> No.8533221

Maybe we could have theme days/weeks/months? Whatever fits the format better

>> No.8533245

I don't like forever scrolling themes because they always freeze on me, I don't know if anyone else has that problem. I prefer a page based theme because of that.

>> No.8533248

>and having gotten older and having more responsibilities

You know OP, I can see this happening once you've begun to settle down, getting/married or have a child. If you're still a single, I think going back to the lifestyle helps.
It is a very lonely thing to be doing though, you will find most your community today would much prefer being able to slip in and out of modern living, and being super cute. Everyone wants to do more than have High Tea and picnic. (I could do them forever)

The fashion is really competitive now, and meetups are like meetings to discuss furthering competition, even if they don't mean to.

>> No.8533261

Hey anon I love this! Followed.
I started a history and lolita blog as well (mostly art history) and I've been researching paintings on popular dresses and basically just connecting fashion throughout history to lolita. This is for my independent study outside of my degree program but would anyone be interested?
>I even cite my sources

>> No.8533262

I really love the way this theme looks though! It's just that endless scrolling that never works right for me. But again maybe it's just me.

The lifestyle thing works for any of the substyles, just that they would put their own aesthetic twist on it. Traditionally it seemed that lifestyle was mostly done by older style sweet for some reason but there's tons of crossover and you can take the same things and swap the color palate and make them more gothic or more sweet. As long as you keep all three styles in mind when posting things I think you'll be fine.

>> No.8533303

Link your blog, anon! I'll follow you, that sounds really interesting.

I have a tiny gothic/aristo blog right now, and I'd love to incorporate more lifestyle type content into it but I'm not sure where to start. Home decor? Music? Hobbies?

>> No.8533316
File: 561 KB, 450x600, Rosemaria Photoshoot in the forest 16.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I'm single and don't have any interest in getting married or kids. I've also never been interested in the communities apart from the worldwide one, and my local one isn't located close enough to me anyway, so I've always been a lone Lolita.

I am going to try lifestyling again though. I know it's going to be difficult but to not do it would be neglecting the greater part of myself. I can't let getting older and having to focus on unpleasant things suck my fun and personality out. If my love of Lolita doesn't return, then I'll know that it's time to move on, but I'll always still try to be myself and live romantically.

Maybe I'm slightly biased, but I recommend making sure you include some older things in your blog and make sure it's not just modern stuff. It doesn't have to be filled with really old-school stuff, but since the lifestyle is considered a thing of the past and so many of the attitudes and inspiration came from back then it just seems appropriate to make sure to include that sort of stuff as well.

I would be glad if the blog could be filled with mostly original content, but I know that if it never takes off that won't happen. I'm really rooting for it though, even though I don't like tumblr, and I will try to contribute to content if I can.

>> No.8533321

I like all that stuff, and home décor and hobbies are some of my favorite things to see on lifestyle blogs. I also like things such as recipes or food recommendations, shopping recommendations, recommendations for books or movies that you've watched that you think fit the aesthetic. Id recommend looking at other people's lifestyle blogs if you're feeling stuck, maybe it could help to give you some inspo.

>> No.8533327

I hear you two about the endless scrolling, I'll fix that in a bit.

Share it here, I'm sure a lot of other people would be interested in it. I am!

>> No.8533330

Actually both of those were me, I wanted to mention that I liked the theme even if I don't like the endless scrolling and I realize it came off looking like two different people. Whoops!

>> No.8533338

That's alright anon, and I was just wondering generally if anyone would be interested in a sort of documentation of me transforming my study and bedroom's?
I don't know if that is too personal and boring, it would just be updating every so often on how far I have come and show what paints I'm using, furniture I've found, decorating idea's ect?
This would be alongside other things of course.

>> No.8533389

i would be interested! i have a lot of wardrobe/rooms saved for inspo. my room is a hot mess and seeing cool people do cool things with their spaces is a motivator.

>> No.8533396

This pic is pretty, but it makes me kind of worry her dress is going to catch on fire from the candles.

>> No.8533498

Please share it, it sounds really interesting!

>> No.8533519

sorry for the cheesy name, im not so creative but thank you anons!
I'll be frank, there might be a few posts a week (trying not to hit double digits at least) that will be sponsored though but i try to keep to the blog theme. I have a special tag for that so you all can blacklist it if its not your cup of tea.

>> No.8534550

I'm loving all the lifestyle/nostalgia threads lately. I find that while I still feel some of the magic, somewhere along the way I became more anxious about likes/reblogs and less about just enjoying lolita and being a kind, creative person.I want to focus more on the beauty of lolita and less about meaningless things like internet popularity.

>> No.8534761

I used to think about internet popularity and fantasize about ways I would do it, things like that. But recent events made me realize I honestly don't care about fame or popularity at all. The way efame is glamorized had me convinced that's what I wanted but it honestly isn't me at all.

>> No.8535552

That sounds great, would gladly read. Go for it anon!

>> No.8535571

I became interested in lolita in 2005, and it was this really magical, fairytale-like fashion to me, and it was like the people who wore it were living in their own little world.
Now that I'm older with some sort of income and can actually wear it, it has changed so much and now it's all about scepters and costumey outfits, and the community is like catty high school cliques.

I don't know what my point is, exactly, I guess I wish lolita was less about e-fame and popular prints, and more about being cute in your normal life. I miss the kind of lolita I fell in love with so many years ago.

>> No.8535771
File: 1000 KB, 750x1127, White Forest Lolita - Little Sunflower Series (1).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I'm sure everyone in this thread feels that way, I know that's how I feel too.

Now that the fashion has changed and so has the subculture, and most people have either moved on and the newer lolitas have never been exposed to the older style and culture, it's up to the few people who still hold it dear to keep it alive. Maybe someday more people will return to it and there will be a revival.

To me, Lolita will always be more than just clothes. I honestly think that for most lolitas it's more than just clothes, but they either don't act upon that or they tuck it away in the back of their dresser drawer to be forgotten.

I feel like I cant stop dreaming about the way Lolita used to be. I've been dreaming about since the day I discovered it and a day hasn't gone by without me having some sort of thought or daydream about it. Maybe since I never really did stop having all those romantic daydreams about lolita is why my nostalgia is so strong. Sometimes I wonder if I'm living too much in the past and need to get on with life, but the images and dreams are still so beautiful to me to this day that I can't stop and don't want to. I don't think there's anything wrong with it because the world needs more beautiful and happy thoughts, but the nostalgia makes me so sad.

Regarding your scepter comment, I know BABY used to release scepters as a collectible item way back when, so it's not a modern idea, but most people only carried them for photo shoots or parties and kept them as a collectable item otherwise. I don't know if they still do or not, but I've always sort of wanted one. I think they are cute and the ones I remember seeing were always very tasteful.

>> No.8535869

This is great so far, but what is going to get posted? Only reblogs?

>> No.8535919

Nah, we have a couple of admins on it now.
I don't know what the other two are going to do I plan just to post >>8533338
and also probably just photography that fit's the aesthetic generally?

>> No.8536188

And of course we are hoping some of you guys will want to contribute!

>> No.8536208
File: 11 KB, 1640x80, 2015-07-29_001721.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I'm fine with the BABY scepters, but the huge staffs that some people carry are way too much for me.

I keep looking at this quote that was in a lolita 2ch thread from 2005 or so, and it's eerie how they sound like modern lolitas complaining about the same thing.

>> No.8536212

I agree! It seems like it's all about being "the best" and "the most beautiful" in my comm, and not about sharing a common love for the aesthetic, you know? It's like meetups have become a beauty pageant... Sigh.

>> No.8536248

Are you guys going to accept submissions? I have a few ideas of things I'd submit, but I don't have the time to run my own blog.

>> No.8536283

I've slowly been drifting away from lolita and into otome because of it, which is kind of a pity. I guess it's fine to be a lone lolita and do what you want, but I do value being hang out with other lolitas because normalfags just don't "get" the money and time it takes to pursue the fashion.

>> No.8536533

Different anon, but I love the pun.

>> No.8536830

Lolitas in my comm are guilty of being OTT sweet wearing weeaboos, but we go for high tea quite often and have visited art museums and the like.

Having a shitty comm is a very unfortunate reason to fall out of love with lolita. Not having quality people around to share it with is totally out of your hands.

>> No.8537610
File: 333 KB, 1024x1534, tumblr_ns5hnuMbFv1s0s3nuo5_1280.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Having a shitty comm is a very unfortunate reason to fall out of love with lolita.

I agree with this, though maybe it's easier for me because I'm a lone Lolita and never was interested in the comms. I know firsthand how lonely it can be, and I know the wishing for Lolita friends and the wanting to have someone to share what you find beautiful with. But life has also taught me that some things you have to do alone, and that doesn't make them any less beautiful, and sometimes the most beautiful things are just a little bit sad.

I grew up living in a mix of run down city and redneck country, and I have always been interested in more romantic things than my peers, so because I was "different" nobody would be my friend, and I grew up learning to do things alone. I finally made a friend and we still are friends to this day, but they have very different interests than me, so I still do most things alone. It is sad sometimes, but it's what I love, and I refuse to give up a part of myself just because I live somewhere that I can't find another person who appreciates it. Lolita is for me, not for other people, so it's not important if I don't have others to share it with.

You never know either, someday you might find someone with common interests where you least expect it. You just need to remember to try having an open mind and not judge a person by the first time you meet them or their appearance alone.

>> No.8538919
File: 116 KB, 440x871, b9f018e3gw1etog3znjvsj20rs1izh3o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Bumping even though it's not quite at the bottom, I just want to be safe because I'm not going to be around for a little and would hate to see this thread accidently die.

This picture, even though it isn't the best one out there, sort of describes visually how I feel in Lolita. I don't really know how to put it into words, but I feel like this picture somehow describes it perfectly without words.

>> No.8539043

So what exactly defines lifestyle lolita? What's the difference between a lifestyle lolita and a non-lifestyle lolita?

>> No.8539083

anyone want to start a LJ revival group on facebook?
we can make blogs and share them kinda like a lolita blog carnival or something? if enough people like the idea i can make the group

>> No.8539126

i went ahead and made it
we could also discuss blogging topics? Im looking to be a better writer but i get stomped on topics

>> No.8539233


I'd join, anon. I'm always looking to talk with other lifestylers!

>> No.8539304

good question..
i dont know.
someone who tries their best to live life like a fairy tale? keeping positive,being *that* stereotype that lolitas are sugary sweet lovelies that lolitas have been trying to move from, being ladylike, not cursing, maybe being more domesticated like in the 50s? I have no clue.Does anyone? or is lifestyle just a romantic fantasy with no basis in the real world? to try in vain to be in this unattainable, dream like state

>> No.8539543
File: 248 KB, 549x640, teapartyandbullshit.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I feel like we've lost this answer since egl died. Maybe there's no wrong or right way to approach this since it seems like individuals have their own preferences and ideas. I imagine a lifestyle gothic lolita would place more emphasis on the macabre, the classic lolita practicing Victorian ideals, and the sweet lolita adding kawaii in everything they do.

Those examples are a good start though. Maybe it can be a collection of things because even if they are different, they still carry on ideals of an Old world view or an alternative worldview rather.

Man, it sucks that I do miss the idea of a life style lolita because I've always felt that even if lolita is essentially a fashion, it backs up a reasoning for wearing it and feels more like a sub-culture - kind of like how punk started out as an anarchistic movement that was later expressed through music and fashion.

I'll still be a fan of the idea(s), but I don't think my sailor lolita swearing and trip-hop listening ways are fitting of the lifestyle.

I'll do what I can to help out. Maybe have a weekly or bi-monthly antique shop post (posting cool finds) or something (I guess some of my hobbies are lolita friendly after all).

>> No.8539550

btw, your url isn't working

>> No.8539561
File: 174 KB, 443x443, iveseensumshit.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>this entry was made on September 18th, 2005

>> No.8539840
File: 101 KB, 427x640, tumblr_l0y6c97GgK1qbat6to1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Everyone in the thread was talking about this earlier. A non lifestyler just wears the clothes, and from my experience they usually don't believe the lifestyle adds value to the clothes anf often feel like it's being fake. A lifestyler tries to add old fashioned or quaint and feminine and sometimes a little bit fantastic touches to their everyday life. A lot of people who are into the lifestyle seem to feel it's what makes Lolita a subculture and that without it Lolita would just be a regular fashion.

EGL dying did contribute to the death of the lifestyle I believe. It's a very broad idea, and there is no right or wrong way to approach it. It's a little different for every individual person, but the ideals are always the same.

A big starting point of the Lolita lifestyle beginner was trying to learn to curb their swearing in order to refine their behavior and be more elegant and polite. Now I have no real problem with people swearing but I do think it's incredibly rude when done in public and especially around children (and honestly I often think it makes people look rather dumb) and personally I try my hardest to not swear as much as possible because it's not something I want people to remember about me and I want to be a more polite person. It's not too hard to do once you become mindful of it, and an easy and Lolita appropriate way to try to stop is to replace your swears with old fashioned and outdated curses and slang that don't carry the weight of a modern curse.

You can be a lifestyler and have interests that aren't Lolita, and to try to force yourself to be someone you're not isn't the idea. In an earlier post someone quoted Princess Skye saying that Your Lolita lifestyle is personal and to change yourself into something you aren't is just conforming to someone else's ideas of who you should be, and that isn't suppose to be what the lifestyle is about.

>> No.8540612

I don't have much to contribute that hasn't already been said, but I really want to express my appreciation for this thread! I've always been kind of a nostalgic loner. My grandparents and great-grandparents raised me and I always felt like the hobbies and values I gained from their influence made it a little more difficult for me to make friends with people Irl in my own generation. Lolita finally gave me a point of reference for people my own age liking the things that I liked and practicing things that I was interested in. The "lolita lifestyle" taught me that I wasn't defective. For me, the overarching theme is that it's okay to be different and that even if you feel lonely, you're never alone. In that way, I feel that lolita is punk's ever so slightly more mild-mannered sister. The fact that the fashion is actually really beautiful and visually interesting was a nice bonus. I think I missed the moment when lolita stopped being a subculture and turned into a fashion.

I don't even remember how I first found EGL. I think it was back when Gaia released that little lolita set and the forums exploded with "why no brolita" threads. I wasn't even that into anime &c, I was so desperate for friends that liked writing and cute stuff!

Anyway, enough of that gush! I think we can all agree that -lifestyle or not- itas are still total posers!

>> No.8540627

Outdated swears are the best. I'm surprised that cuckold is becoming a thing again.

>> No.8540776


To understand lifestyle/non lifestyle lolita I think it's helpful to make a parallel to vintage fashion. Some people buy and wear vintage because the clothes appeal to them and that's really the extent of it. And then other people make vintage their whole lifestyle, besides the clothes they decorate their home to match, have related hobbies like swing dance or classic cars, watch old movies, socialize with others with similar interests etc. They don't have to put on an act or literally pretend to live in the past, it just suits their personality and influences their whole lifestyle.

So apply the same to lolita. Some people just like the clothes and that's fine, but it's also possible to match your lifestyle to the feeling of the style. And it depends a lot on the person, like a MMM loyalist might make everything black and blue and make mana/music a big focus vs super sweet angelic pretty fan having everything kawaii vs a classic lolita that focuses on the victorian era. Just whatever your lolita style is, incorporate it into your whole lifestyle. I honestly don't know why it isn't more popular... maybe because people associate it with putting on an act? But doesn't it make sense that many lolitas are drawn to the fashion because they already have that type of personality and interests? In my experience, the girls interested in the lifestyle aspect come to it genuinely, so idk why it became associated with changing your behavior and being fake.

>> No.8540785

I'd never shun anyone in the fashion for this, but I really believe that someone who lives the lifestyle to some degree, in whatever form it may take for them, is much more a part of the subculture than those who just wear it to conventions, or who don't wear it, or at least inspired clothing outside meetups (unless they genuinely aren't able to).

I feel awful for thinking this, and I'd never treat anyone differently for it, but after many years in the fashion, I've found that those with a deeper interest, those who live an "eccentric" or Lolita lifestyle to some degree tend to stick around longer and treat it less like clothes and more like a part of their life.

I really must sound awful.

>> No.8540835
File: 156 KB, 500x405, 3145_600.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>So apply the same to lolita.
This is a bit of a false dichotomy. Classic retro vintage actually happened, with clothes that were actually made during that time or that are currently being made and maintained in that style. It'd be more appropriate if we actually dressed up in victorian or rococo period inspired clothing and stuck primarily to these types of dress styles, but right now that is not the case, it's a print clusterfuck. Lolita fashion is a serious hot mess which follows no rules other than to make a profit off young girls. Which leads into this:

>I honestly don't know why it isn't more popular... maybe because people associate it with putting on an act?
Simply put? Yes. It does look like an act, it looks really really fake, and weird, even some of the cotton material used early on had a terrible paper like texture which flies in the face of rococo sensibility, it's a mess. It always looks better when done in a calmer, more casual otome normal fag kind of way, or on the opposite end when it's very true to classical rococo.

I rewatched Kamikaze Girls yesterday cause it's been years, and it all felt incredibly fake, and weird, and why is she dressing up like a small child, why is she wearing a baby's bonnet if she enjoys rococo fashion, why not a more mature appropriate bonnet? Nothing felt believable. It's a weird cobbled together harajuku fashion style that doesn't make a lot of cohesive sense and I think the child-like aspect is a real turn off to most people, myself included. Yes it exists, it's there, it's weird. I generally try to avoid it and incorporate only casual outfits into my general style, avoid the peter pan collars, but it's this reason I would never call myself a lolita, or be a part of its community, it has ageplay elements, or "doll-like", but let's not fool ourselves in thinking it isn't interchangeable.

>> No.8540844

Honestly I don't think you sound awful. If you truly don't judge people for it even if you feel that way, then you're not doing any harm.

And I actually agree with you. There's nothing wrong with it being "just clothes" to you, but then you aren't really a part of the greater subculture either. It's like a person who wears goth or punk clothes, but doesn't hold any of the same ideals and philosophies, and has no interest in the related music. You wear the clothes, but you're not a part of the culture.

I think this is a really good way too look at it. I wanted to explain it but couldn't think of anything to say that hasn't already been said. Back when the fashion was still a baby over in the west the lifestyle was huge, but as it gained popularity girls started to worry that the lifestyle would get them negative judgment (even though it's such a huge part of the fashion, even the G&LB's has lifestyle stuff in them all the time) since the clothes were already getting so much attention. Thus, lifestylers were shunned.

>For me, the overarching theme is that it's okay to be different and that even if you feel lonely, you're never alone.

This is how I feel about Lolita too.

>> No.8540845

>rococo sensibility
The fashion didn't resemble rococo anything until the classic brands picked up on it a few years ago.

>> No.8540874

It's been a few years since I last saw it too, but I remember her whole rococo speech being mostly about the ideals of that lifestyle, not a desire to replicate its fashion style exactly. Clothing like that would've been impractical in her life, but lolita gave her a similarly fancy feeling that she related to that time period and its decadence.

>> No.8540908


I realize they aren't exactly the same, but the distinction between lifestyle/just clothes approach is similar, which is what I was speaking to. And yes lolita is kind of a mishmash, which is why "lolita lifestyle" isn't strictly defined but rather dependant on individual style. Actually vintage is the similar, there are a lot of different approaches from kitschy to sophisticated even though it all relates to the same era.

It's okay if you don't like it or don't get it. I think its pretty obvious Momoko wasn't trying to recreate rococo in her life, because yeah if she was she failed. She was inspired by the rococo spirit of hedonism and charm, which she connected to her lolita clothes. The whole point is that she was doing what she wanted, and it doesn't matter at all if it makes sense to observers. Besides, people are going to think we're weirdos just from the clothes anyway so I really don't think it makes a lot of difference if some girls do find personal meaning in it and let it influence other aspects of their lives.

>> No.8540996


Aw. I'm a total weeb, but I'd love to swap letters. I have a stationary set that I found at an estate sale and I've been meaning to use it for sometime.

>> No.8541120

Oh I remember this!
Some of the tips were lulzy but the spirit was good. When I started wearing lolita around 2007 I was worried my life wasn't 'lolita enough'. Things have changed so much now... I would want to wear lolita everyday but my job is messy and I get lazy to dress myself just to being home. I'm a lone lolita, I got nobody to share activities with.

>> No.8541711

you're going to attract a lot of shit with that blog name unfortunately. i feel like it should have been something like "dailyromantic" or "day-to-dayprincess" since lifestyle lolita is now a buzzword.

>> No.8541713

anyone know what OP she's wearing?

>> No.8542050

Little Sunflower by White Forest Lolita. Says right in the file name.

>> No.8542096
File: 110 KB, 640x427, tumblr_m2ce4umH0D1qay9xeo1_1280.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I wore Lolita for the first time this year. I always had an excuse not to wear it, but yesterday I woke up and said, "I am going to wear it today no matter what."
It was a casual outfit, a pretty pink skirt worn with a Hello Kitty t-shirt, and bloomers only, no petticoat (though my skirt does have one built in). I didn't even put stockings on until I had to leave the house. Once I clipped a lace bow into my hair and looked at myself in the mirror I could feel the magic again. I had to run to the store, and I got a few looks from adults and children alike, and I hope that I brought them a little light to their day the same way the clothes brought it to mine.

Wearing Lolita again after not wearing it in so long also brought a less than pleasant realization to me. Perhaps the reason I'm always avoiding wearing it so much is because it's just too cumbersome. I found as wonderful as I felt, I spent my day just sitting around, and even then I felt a fear that I was wrinkling up my skirt.
I never have gotten used to how much volume Lolita has, and I couldn't even go pick my garden because I was afraid I might get mud on my clothes. The layers are too hot for the summer, and they aren't warm enough for the winter unless I layer an extreme amount, and then the layers are so awful and uncomfortable I couldn't wear them without feeling iIll, and how hard it is to do things in so many layers!

That brings me to what I'd really like to say most. I always loved the romantic lifestyle of Lolita, even if it's not something many, if any do anymore. It let me feel like it's okay for me to be myself. And I love the gorgeous clothes. But I don't love wearing the clothes. Even when worn casually and without a petticoat, I still feel a bit uncomfortable and afraid to actually "live" in the clothes, they still feel special to me and it's not something I wear daily. Lolita feels less like something I can do as a part of my lifestyle and more like I'm wearing a party gown.

>> No.8542098

Anon it really just sounds like Lolita isn't for you.

>> No.8542110
File: 78 KB, 500x375, tumblr_lfgxo0e4tq1qf5kzoo1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

After thinking about these things and thinking about my feelings, I think I may have found the answer. I don't know that Lolita is for me at all and perhaps maybe that part of my life is over with. But that doesn't mean I can't wear the gorgeous clothes. I'm going to change the way I look at them and wear them to suit my own unique lifestyle.

I'll do away with the petticoat except for a special occasion, and toss out the rules of Lolita altogether. I'm going to start treating the clothes as something I can wear everyday. It won't be quite Lolita, but it will be me, and it will allow me to wear what I love whenever I wish instead of whenever the stars are in alignment for me.

I already feel freedom while thinking about this. Maybe I'll try it and things won't work out after all, but it's important to me that I try. Lolita has been a part of my identity for a long time, and while I'm ready to give that up, I just can't give up the clothes, and of course I can't give up the lifestyle.

As the seasons begin to change, and lazy summer becomes the fall, crisp and busy with harvest and preparing for the winter, I,too, am changing. I am leaving Lolita behind me, and blossoming into a maiden from an old dusty book. A girl living in the forest in raggedy clothes. A princess who runs away to become a knight. I'm going to take all the parts of the things I love best and let them coexist and mingle into to something that's doable for me. It's going to be a little scary, but I feel as if I should have done this years ago. I'm ready.

>> No.8542112

Sorry for the late reply anon, but yes we are pretty much relying on submissions.
I want this blog to be contributed by lots of different people so it can be as diverse as possible.

>> No.8542115

Lolita is not part of your identity, even with the lifestyle aspect.

Also, what you're talking about seems way different than the idea of lifestyle that most people have. You sound less interested in the indulgence of particularly girly, victorian habits and more interested in being a fantasy book character. It's far more escapist thank the rest of us and much less attainable.

>> No.8542122

You should make a note of that somewhere on the blog so people know. Make an about page and reserve the FAQ page for the stupid questions people will eventually start asking. At the moment the blog is pretty void of information and looks only like it's been half done, which maybe it has and there's more still that you're doing with it and just haven't yet, and if so I apologize.

Besides submitted posts, perhaps you could consider posting something once in a while as well. You could post one of Novala's poems once in a great while, or link to old essays and musings from the old days. I like the idea of recipes and room décor posts too, and maybe even party/social gathering ideas.

>> No.8542126

jfc anon, I need more pictures like this.
This was before my time, I think.

>> No.8542136

Anon you replied to here.

The inspiration behind Lolita came from many different places. Both fairy tales and days gone by are big parts of it. I don't see why my love for stories isn't as valid of an inspiration ad my love of the outdated and exploring old-fashioned hobbies and traditions.

But your right, Lolita isn't for me. That's why I am going to try something new. It might work, it might not, but I won't know until I try it. It seems sad, and awfully silly of me, to not enjoy the clothes if I love them so much. So I'm doing what I have to in order to find what works for me as an individual.

>> No.8542142

It sounds like you hardly had a grasp on lolita in the first place to be honest. More that you fancy yourself a fairytale character and were romanticizing it to fit in with your ideals more than them meshing together.

>> No.8542152
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In the days of early black metal in Norway, artists would go on about Satanism, Death, and National Socialism when talking to the press. This wasn't done to spread their ideals, it was done to marginalize their group and to scare away those who were viewed as not being dedicated enough to the music.
>>The scene was exclusive and created boundaries around itself, incorporating only those it deemed to be "true" or committed. Musical integrity was highly important and artists wanted black metal to remain underground and uncorrupted.

And it worked, the early Norwegian blackmetal scene created some of the best and most influential metal music of all time. For this reason, I think that lolita needs something to scare away those who are more interested in other subcultures that aren't compatible with lolita. Alternative fashions that seek to "rebel from the mainstream" by giving into the mainstream drugs and sex culture should not be tolerated. We need something that could help scare these people from Tumblr or other undesirable communities away. In most subcultures, members gain status through dedication to it's music, art, ect. In lolita, you buy an expensive dress and wear it properly. That's how you gain status. Since that's all it takes to get lolita cred, we end up having some undesirable people in lolita. It's really no wonder that it's so popular among attention whores and snowflakes. To combat this issue, I propose...

1. We develop a greater appreciation towards handmade clothing and towards the people who make their own stuff

2. We devolve our own type of art to go with the fashion, we already have some. (Bizenghast, Kamikaze girls, ect.)

Anyone else have any ideas on how to scare away all the Tumblr girls?

>> No.8542171

Sorry to say, but the mainstream exclusion of lolita is far beyond help. Especially with things like e-fame and the kawaii ambassador title drama, destroying that mindset is going to be almost impossible. It does make sense that a lifestyle revival would happen at this time though. The western community has never been unified. I just wish people would understand that these kinds of communities require a level of elitism to function and that even if it's 'just clothes' to them, posers and itas ruin communities.

>> No.8542173

If you're wearing it in your own house, you really don't need to do all the layers for it to look cute. Try a skirt without a petti and a breezy summer cutsew? You could also get a bodyline skirt to wear in the garden. They are just clothes, dirt would wash right off.

>> No.8542176

I'm still working on it, but I took your idea for an FAQ and about page!
And thankyou for the other ideas, I've been working a lot recently so I haven't had much time to devote to this unfortunately but I will get it done!

>> No.8542180

I disagree. Western lolita has never been united, but I think that's what can save us at this point. Within goth, there are "mall goths" who are generally hated by goths, but still make up the majority of the fashion. Know what I mean?

>> No.8542185

Fuck no, use WordPress. Also, I hate you. All you're doing is getting us even more recognition from the cancer that is tumblr.

>> No.8542188

>Adopt Russian level elitism
>Shun and shame people who wear lolita to cons to further reduce the "lolita=costume" idea
>Promote culture of bragging over how much an outfit cost to buy (brand only) or make (top tier materials only)
>Shun and shame trend hoppers, e-famous people who wore other jfashions previously, people wearing more than one jfashion in addition to lolita
The biggest barrier for lolita is money, and the biggest "threat" is dilution. Ignoring poorfags would help a lot, as would nipping cross-fashioner trends. The travesty that was peignoirs stemmed from people also trying to dabble in CPK at the same time, I can only imagine the horrors to come from this larme kei nonsense.

>> No.8542189
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You are forget the aspect of lolita that is based on looking like a doll, anon. Hence the big clunky shoes and the visible bloomers. It's more based on Rococo style dolls and children's clothing than on actual Rococo.

>> No.8542191

Also the length of skirts which is worn by children or children's dolls.

>> No.8542198

But shit like PC and antibullying SJW shit is going to snuff it out.

>> No.8542199

>Promote culture of bragging over how much an outfit cost to buy
Ugh, could we not? We already have this culture. The whole "get your hands on this super sought after print" is a good example. It's obviously more about the status than the dress. The only reason people want these "special prints" is because they want to show off their wealth and get popular. Dedicating effort into something that's not superficial is what scares posers and snowflakes away. These girls have nothing going on upstairs, but anyone can buy a dress and be appreciated for it.

I've thought about cranking up the bitchiness too, but now I think that would just add to the problem.

Maybe we should all take a vow of chastity to preserve our purity for a certain period of time. Or, we could find some other ridiculous way to judge one another. The mainstream antisocial youth culture is based on "don't judge me, I do what I want, yolo". We should be more judgmental on one another based on looks, manners, dedication to the lifestyle, ect.
Some basic rules...
>can't be fat
>must learn to sew
>Must be a proper lady
>always maintain your honer and dignity

If girls are shown to have questionable morals, they could be shunned from the community. Yes?

>> No.8542205

We have an anon image board to shit SJW lolitas, all we need not is to get more girls to stop posting their coords to Tumblr.

>> No.8542298

Can we please find a medium between total bitchiness and "there are no rules in lolita!!"? Tumblr aside, lolita is judgmental enough. If we haven't scared off the eternal itas yet, more bitchiness probably isn't going to stop them (honestly, I think some of them thrive off of it). If we can be firm in educating and correcting newbies, I think that would be more helpful.

But I'm okay with lolita not being a super exclusive club with no outside influence. If we become too insular, we might die off or stagnate. If someone dresses well and isn't fucking up the community somehow, I'm okay with them being there. Every fashion has dumb trends sometimes, anyway.

>If girls are shown to have questionable morals, they could be shunned from the community. Yes?
Scammers, legitimate creepers, total assholes, etc. should definitely be shunned, I agree.

>> No.8542315

Well, if that's true, then leaving it is probably a very good idea for me.

I guess I shouldn't have used so much story- sounding writing, I didn't realize it would give off the wrong idea. I thought other Lolitas were also inspired by stories too.

Regarding some of the chatter that suddenly exploded in this thread,
I feel like the anti-snowflake and elitist mindset is just as dangerous as the snowflake mindset itself. I personally dislike both groups of people. I think maybe the best thing to do is live and let live and not get so serious about one or the other.

>> No.8542333

I agree, I've been lurking here and seriously both ends of the spectrum are as shitty as each other.
In the end we all look like we're weirdos to normal people.

>> No.8542349

Thanks for the kind advice. I do like the idea of buying cheaper pieces to use for wearing for dirty activities. I have trouble seeing my Lolita things as clothes right now, since they feel more like party dresses and I rarely wear them, which makes them feel too special for daily life. I still think that I need to move on from the strict Lolita outfit formula though. During the many years I've been involved with the fashion, I watched a lot of girls that I really adored leave. I thought it was understandable, but I could never figure out how they could just give up on it so quickly and be so eager to move on. I think I understand now though.

>> No.8542350

We need more assholes and less fake bitches plz

>> No.8542368

I'd rather have less of both.

>> No.8542404


I don't get where the idea that being a jerk is okay because it's somehow better than being "fake." I don't really understand what "fake" is even suppose to mean anymore, people have accused me of being fake my entire life just for being a nice person and trying not to swear much. I'm just being myself, so I must be a fake person.

Anyway I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think it's all ridic, People need to calm down.

>> No.8542430

>trying not to swear much
That would already be fake to many people. I wouldn't necessarily agree but to many people there's a world difference between having no intention to swear and trying not to swear even though you feel like it.

>> No.8542446

I like your style of writing it reminded me of Skye.

Having been in to the fashion for 10 years myself I can understand graduating from lolita. I still wear lolita clothes but not always in a lolita way, I have my own style and aesthetic lolita just wasn't enough for me sometime around my 7th year. I'm glad you're feeling inspired again, that means you're definitely making the right choice I wish I could see what your style morphs in to.

>> No.8542472

>Anyone else have any ideas on how to scare away all the Tumblr girls?
You're not going to scare away Tumblr girls. I'm sorry, but with the advent of social media, once niche and tight-knit communities and interests have gained a fuckton of popularity. Cosplay, lolita, sci-fi movie/tv show fandoms, comic books are some I've witnessed explode in the last 10 years. The only way to protect "our precious fashion" is for everyone to stop wearing it and stop sharing pictures collectively. That isn't going to happen.

What will happen, however, is people will either lose or gain further interest. They'll either move on to something else or they'll become better at it in time. Of course there will always be people who never really get it and eternally screw it up until they eventually phase themselves out. Patience is a virtue.

In reality, you can't control what other people do. You can only control your own actions. Don't like tumblr culture in the fashion? Don't be a part of it. Don't like trends, don't hop on the bandwagon. Don't like fat people, don't get fat. If you think you can police others into wearing lolita the way you want them to, you're going to be wasting a lot of time. I suggest investing that energy into a more productive hobby.

>> No.8542522
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I grew up being taught that I shouldn't swear in public no matter what. I don't want to swear, and I never used to, but it just sort of became habit after having to be surrounded by people who cursed a lot for long periods of time. I don't see how it's fake for me to try not swearing if it's something I don't personally want to do. I'm not trying to argue or anything, especially since you just said you don't personally agree, I just don't understand why trying to be a better person and being myself makes people think I'm faking who I am.

That's honestly one of the most flattering things I've heard because I used to like Skye's writing. I wasn't trying to mimic her or anything, I just wanted to write something that came more from my romantic side since this is a lifestyle thread and I thought it would be acceptable.
That's what I wish to do, wear the clothes but not in a Lolita way. It's funny, I'm in what I believe is my 7th year of Lolita. I have my own style and aesthetic too and it encompasses more than just Lolita, and Lolita really does not always agree with my lifestyle even though I am what you would consider a lifestyle lolita.
I'm afraid my new evolving style may not morph so gracefully at first, but I'm very excited to see where it goes. I want to add more mori and possibly otome influence to my clothes, along with things that have a fairy-tale charm to them or an old-world look, and overall I want things to be more laid back and simpler so I can easily enjoy wearing them daily.

You sound like a very intelligent person. I'm glad that you left this comment. It's good advice, realistic and hurts nobody.

>> No.8542717

Wow, this thread got kind of weird.

I can kind of see where people are going with wanting to maintain standards, though "elitism" seems a bit strong and some of the suggestions for doing so seem a little silly and arbitrarily exclusive. I think that the best way to do this would be to have some universal guidelines about the lifestyle, while still trying to keep it flexible for individual interpretation.

My biggest suggestion for this is a rule to always strive to be polite and courteous. This doesn't necessarily mean it has to be a hugbox, but to prevent people from being outright rude. If you're going to offer criticism, do it constructively, avoid name-calling, etc. Disagreements are going to happen, but there are ways to argue civilly. In fact I think it would be a good idea to post some sort of netiquette guideline to point people to.

Trying to get rid of trends altogether and ignoring tumblr just because tumblr is kind of ridiculous imo. The first because it's a fashion and trends are going to happen no matter what you do. The second because outside of cgl, tumblr is where the vast majority of lolitas congregate and ignoring that is pretty much guaranteeing failure due to lack of interest.

So basically: standards are good to have, but let's not be stupid and shoot ourselves in our collective foot over it, yeah?

>> No.8542863

Yeah I don't know what happened to the thread, but I'm the OP and I am pretty irked TBH that it went in the directionnit did. I don't know what I was expecting, I suppose this is CGL.

Less whatever is happening and more lifestyle and romance please. I don't believe extreme negative attitudes and elitism of any kind are appropriate to voice on a thread that was intended to be about nostalgia and positivity.

>> No.8542891

I know right? As long as I've been in the fashion and that pic is before my time too. I wish I could see more old photoshoots. They were always so enchantingly beautiful.

>> No.8543142
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Google "18th century bonnet"

>> No.8543185

This sort of bonnet was very common and popular amongst the "common folk" in the 18th century.
Then Marie Antoinette got her Petite Trianon and decided to run around pretending she was a farm girl. Which set of this trend for the "farm girl" look and amongst the court. She even wore one to face the guillotine. I'm too lazy to look up a painting for that but yeah its not a "baby bonnet".

>> No.8543375

Yee.that's cgl for you. As to redirect the thread, would anyone be interested in being penpals?

>> No.8543383

That totally sounds like something a rich person would do.
Didn't her husband help fund the American Revolution?

>> No.8543389

It would help if a social media site like LJ came back again. What helped "kill" lolita (AKA make it more mainstream) was the mass exodus to mainstream sites like Tumblr and Facebook

>> No.8544143

That would be pretty difficult, considering her husband lost his head too. France, however, did help with the American revolution, because by the time it happened they were old hats at the revolution game.
>History, motherfucker.

>> No.8544153

Your understanding of basic history, in particular the parts of it that are relevant to democracies and republics today, is so limited it's embarrassing.

>> No.8544331
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Wasn't it a jab at her by the New republic? And someone drew a caricature of her heading to the guillotine. Pic related and source http://www.wga.hu/html_m/d/david_j/7/702david.html

>> No.8544358
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According to the book 'queen of fashion' she picked her own outfit which wasn't a far cry from what she was already wearing at the time. And even though the rich adopted the bonnet they didn't do away with their Ott hair styles so it lays a little awkwardly.

>> No.8544367

My history is a bit rusty, but didn't the French Revolution happen after the American? I also remember reading that Louis XVI supported the Americans.

>> No.8544387

Oh wow, sounds interesting. I'm gonna add it to my reading list. Thank you!
Back on topic, what were the reasons for liking lolita? Not so much entering the fashion, but more so when you first heard of it and saw it, how did it make you feel? For me, it was the perfect blend of girly hyper femininity, but also still somewhat rebellious. I doubt I'm the only one who was somewhat "expected" to wear mainstream female fashion, most of which really showed skin. But I liked the whole "I can be beautiful and not have to show more skin than I'm comfortable with. Also there was this asian teenager living in my neighborhood at the time I started getting into anime and jfashion (like 2003-5?) And she'd wear visual kei, kuro lolita, cosplay in my strict Italian American neighborhood, it really was a sight. But no one ever bothered her outside of staring. She did her thing despite the stares. I hope she's doing well wherever she is right now, we never even spoke but damn she was ballsy.

>> No.8544479

I liked the obvious historical and fairy-tale/folk/princess influences, I especially loved the little details of the garments, I have an eye for details and enjoy intricacy. I appreciated that the dresses were not only cute, but made with more quality and covered more skin than what mainstream has offered for the last 15 years as well.

When I first seen the clothes, after my initial surprise and what I just discovered, I felt like I finally found clothes that matched my personality and interests after being unhappy with the clothing I could find normally for a very long time.

For me it was never about rebelling, it was just about being myself, but I don't deny the rebellion is there at all and I think it's cool and I relate to it a lot.

>> No.8544489

I have been wanting to try finding a penpal for a while, but I want to be picky about who I'd trade addresses with and so far I've been too shy to actually go through it. I actually have a friend who lives long distance, and we talked about dropping internet communication except for emergencies and pen-palling instead (it was her idea actually), but she's not a romantic disposed person and she never did go through with it, seems the idea sounded better in her head and she struggles to write anything.

>> No.8544565

there was a lolita pen pal group on fb dont know if its still there or active

>> No.8544816

I'm the same, I've really wanted to find a pen pal but I want to be picky as well. So far I've just sent a few letters to my long distance friends for special events or heartfelt messages...

>> No.8544894

This thread got me nostalgic for Skye's old stuff, so I went to her Flickr to look at some pictures for a smile, but some of them are missing or no longer available and I don't think it's just my computer. I hope they aren't all going to disappear. I'm saving everything that's left into my inspo folder in case something happens. Just thought I'd share the warning in case anyone else loved her things too.

>> No.8545153


>> No.8545220

I'm kinda glad this thread is here. I found out about lolita just as people were starting to post less about lifestyle and more about the heightening fervor of BTB drama. Which was sad because the lifestyle aspect is what got me interested in the fashion aspect.

For me, Lolita has a sense of daintiness and sweet calm that when applied in my life in small ways was one of the best ways of coping. It feels so soothing to cook beef stew on a snowy night whilst wearing a frilly apron you made for yourself. Or finding DIYs that have to do with beauty and health to just generally pamper yourself with. You can't feel too bad doing your daily hygiene routine while listening to a playlist of vintage French vocalists. I really miss posts about Lolita lifestyle.

>> No.8545237

I'm glad to hear from another person who feel the same way I do. It's a relief to know that there are at least a handful of girls still interested in these things. Makes me feel less alone and reminds me that it is okay to be myself even if people think my romantic and feminine side is weird.

>> No.8545267

Louis XVI supported the Americans indirectly with arms and loans. He also supported America directly by declaring war on Britain. He did so not because of his love for the republic and freedom of the commoner, but because of the conflict with Britain. All of the efforts resulted in huge debt which was one of the causes of the later French revolution.

>> No.8545525

Nope, don't listen to them, you're absolutely right, I completely understand where you're coming from, do exactly what you feel is best for you. I'm the same way, I can't stand the level of poof and want to be able to wear my clothes more frequent and casually, so I did away with the petticoat and wore pieces with whichever blouse I felt like in whichever way I liked, to express myself in whichever way I wanted.

>> No.8545690

dude, i'm pretty sure half the dudes in norwegian black metal were that crazy, plenty of those guys made some prison time for burning churches and the like an i doubt dead's suicide was a fake. also you'd think varg is pushing the joke pretty far, what with killing a dude and marrying some crazy lady just for the sake of being marginalized... i don't think music quality has much to do with the degree of sanity of the artist, sorry.

back to topic, i don't think you guys can scare away tumblr, it's too late for that when most lolita already use it.
that said, it wouldn't be necessary for a lifestyle lolita revival i think, i doubt it'd be the kind of stuff that interest tumblr to begin with, so you could just become a smallish and tight knit livestyle community inside the biggest lolita community.

>> No.8545776
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AYRT. Thank you for your words, they've helped to assure me I won't regret taking a new path. I'm glad my meaning came through even though I got a bit carried away with my words. Of course I love the way Lolita is in it's full poof and layers of details, but it's not practical and I have more loves than Lolita alone and wish for a way to combine them into something that is more personal. I like to compare it to going from being a European princess to a storybook maiden because that's how I feel my style is changing, and the way I see changes in myself since I started as a lolita. I hope it will allow me to wear my clothes on a regular and daily basis, and give me the ability to better express myself through what I wear. Since it sounds like that's what it did for you, I'm sure it will work out for me too.

>> No.8545895

I would like to not feel the need for a partner, but since i always fail so badly (too sperg) and most of my life i' passed it as single i think getting into lolita lifestyle would be a great idea to indulge. I have some friends that dress lolita but they aren't interested into a lifestyle or they arent close friends. At times what i really need is a girl that loves lolita lifestyle, visual kei and gothic stuff. I feel pretty alone for now, so my desire is this but it seems all the lolitas now are con goers, weebs and similar i.e. part-time lolita. I feel sad to not wear that much lolita due to not having a best lolita friend. There are some fb groups about lolita penpals, not sure if that could work but hey... at least distance friendship and lolita skyping while drinking some tea would be amazing.
>i live in the middle of nowhere south Italy sigh
Anon!! I felt the same when i discovered lolita but now with all these comms, high tea parties, perfect coords and petty drama has lost its charm. But we can create our lolita world, maybe alone or with a close friend is best than a shitty comm. I'm not that much into popular prints of now (i have Dream Fantasy and Toy Parade but they dropped their popularity), i love old school and simple items as well and i'm trying to make more kawaii my life. I'm obsessed with My Melody but i wear mostly black, it's a bit weird.
I start to notice some lolita lifestyles are at times loners at heart due to feeling different from their peers, that is interesting.

>> No.8545956

I'm a product of American public schools
>pls no bully

>> No.8546106

At times what i really need is a girl that loves lolita lifestyle, visual kei and gothic stuff.

We must have been separated at birth, Anon. I've basically given up on finding someone with the same interests as me locally.

>> No.8546954

Different anon, but I've given up on ever finding someone with my interests where I live too. Forever stuck in the Midwest. I like all the nature but the people are just so... unappreciative of romantic things or finery. I was well liked in school but I couldn't make real friends with anyone because everyone thought I was too offbeat.

Which reminds me, once when I was younger a group of kids somehow became convinced that I was a witch. I overheard them talking and one finally came up to me and asked if I was. I was like 10 years old or something and even though it was meant to be insulting and they were freaked out by my presence alone I took it as a complement because I thought witches were cool. I'm sorry that has nothing to do with Lolita, just something I thought of. But it does bring up a topic that is about Lolita, I always though witch Lolita should be a thing. I know they do it every year around Halloween, but I think it should be a year round sub-style. I just love it.

>> No.8547996

Anon, lets meet! Yeah, it's really hard to find someone with similar interests in my place or someone i click a lot even if i dont have too much in common. And... the more i get older, the more is harder to find people like you because many are getting families and marry, too much work and they don't induge anymore in something they would really like. I feel a bit behind at times. But that lolita lifestyle... the thought of it make me feel better, that being alone or not like others isn't a bad thing and i can find the strength in myself. It's one of the few alt lifestyle that really match with my personality. It makes you appreciate the simplest but prettiest things of life without that useless consumist hedonism of today (and modern lolita seems falling on this).
We should really start a forum, a fb group, a lj or something to revive the lifestyle!!
Me too is too much offbeat and more into a calmer life with appreciation of the small things. In HS i was always the loner and unfortunately a bit bitter but now i'm older i'm discovering i shouldn't not be negative and ignore what people thinks of me. Now, i remember an ex friend that had some disrespect for lolita, maybe she thought being feminine was a weakness or silly clothing, ugh.

>> No.8548151

I'm not sure how it is for you, but I really really like dolly kei and I know you mentioned mori- gunne sax, laura ashley, along with any vintage pieces I can get my hands on. I dress according to my mood, sometimes I just want to wear all black and sometimes I want to look like a teacher or a a chic secretary from the 80's, a 60's house wife, and sometimes I want to look like I've been living in a forest all my life. Sometimes I want to look loud and sometimes I want to look peaceful. Good luck on your style journey, I would love to see what you come up with.

>> No.8549385
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Oh I like many different styles too, and I think wearing what suits your feelings for the day is a lot of fun. I decided I'm not going to box myself into categories, so I'm avoiding labels altogether, for a while at least, in order to allow myself to develop my own style and feel more confident with experimenting and mixing pieces up. The Lolita mindset is to follow a specific formula and perfection, and while it helps to achieve the look, it has made it hard for me to forget the rules and freely do as I like, and it made me forget that it's okay to be imperfect and real, and that my shoes don't have to match down to the last little detail if I don't want them to.

I plan to have two sides in my wardrobe, one for funky, casual clothes that are more on the mainstream side, with lots of colors and blacks and fun things that are easy to wear and mismatch. The other side will be filled with dresses and skirts that evoke a more old and natural, maiden-like feeling, like I just stepped out from an old movie or book or a lost cottage in the woods.

Thank you for the well wishes, I'm very excited and I've already started making plans.

>> No.8550330

Lolita Lifestylers blog mods:

Is your ask box working? I sent a couple asks the other day and they were never answered.

I know your blog is still a baby but I like the poem you posted and the meet ideas and the list of 101 lifestyle ideas. Very cute, very oldschool. God, I want to relive those days more than anything. Everything was so rosy then. There was so much magic. I haven't felt magic like that in years now.

Also a question about how it works, since I don't have a Tumblr account. How does submitting things work? I would like to submit things in the future, maybe some writings or see if I can't dig up some links to old photo-shoots or something.

I'll send a shout out about the blog to Lolita Tips too, to try getting you guys some traffic and hopefully followers and contributors.

>> No.8551248

I've been sent to a blogging thread from the general, this seems closer to what I want. I'm starting up a lolita/lifestyle blog. I'll post music (not my own, but some great artists), cooking/baking, sewing, etc.
The description for my blog reads:
"I'm a dreamer and a hopeless romantic. Intrinsically in love with life and the ups, downs, sides, and loop-de-loops of emotion.
There are many flavours to life.
You could find anything here"

Does this sound terrible, or ok? I don't want to sound too ~deep~, verbose or pretentious.
Haven't written anything in a long time.

>> No.8551427

I like the first line of your description, but the second and third are super cheesy and sound like some kinda broken English. It doesn't sound pretentious or anything, just extremely out of place.

>> No.8552110

I didn't like those much anyway, so that is good to hear!
I might keep the second line solely to fit with the blog theme.

>> No.8552240

If you keep it, I'd reword it to make it sound more eloquent personally.

>> No.8552558

There are many flavours to life, be they the tang of tears or the sweetness of a smile; my flavour may be corny, but at least I am not a salty seagull.
Would this be an improvement?

>> No.8552798

Can't wait to see your blog!!I would like if you only use the first line, it's really good.

>> No.8552833

I've done that.
The blog is thecutiecafe at blogspot.

advice on layout/any tips are welcome.

>> No.8552889

I really like the description you chose, can't wait to see the blog grow.

>> No.8552904
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I was never the cute frilly lolita-appropriate kind of girl - but I've always wanted to be.

Sadly, I've had to settle for a more jasper-like look. I'm so jelly of you adorable cute girly girls! <3

>> No.8552929

>that shitty show for kids
Seriously, go back to tumblr. Nobody wants you here.

>> No.8553025

Can we not please not rag on people just for liking things? It's kind of ridiculous. Cartoons or no, we're supposed to all be adults here, not children on a playground.

>> No.8553066

It's like, a fucking good show with awesome values, it's easily one of the best cartoons to come out in a long time.

>> No.8553770

The first half is okay and cute, but again the second half is kind of not so good. It really is up to you though. Good luck on your blog!

>> No.8553775

You know, I used to think that I wasn't cute or pretty and couldn't ever look girly. My body is small and thin and obviously feminine, but my face is really androgynous. I have a lot of masculine features to my face and I spent a lot of time feeling like I could never be "cute because of it. Then I actually wore Lolita and I realized I have never felt cuter in my life and my features quit mattering.

I like that Lolita lets me show off my personality on the inside by what clothes I wear on the outside.

Lesson is, if it's something you're interested in, try it just one time. I think people should try as many things as they are able to in their life, and you might be surprised.

>> No.8553864

I can relate in a way. I'm prone to putting on muscle more easily. I'm built like a linebacker with broad shoulders. My calves and thighs are pure muscle because my body doesn't want to store much fat there. Put me in heels and it's rippling calves time! My biceps are very visible. But I'm also on the chubby side as well, so that adds more to the bulk. (basically what /fit/ calls it builtfat) Nothing about me is petite and frail.

I've also been into the obese range in the past. I never really learned anything beyond basic makeup: foundation, eyeshadow, mascara, basic eyeliner, etc. I rarely wore it after high school except for cosplay and you couldn't even tell I'd even put on any makeup when I did because I'd look so plainfaced in photos. What is photography makeup? I never felt particularly beautiful and actually kind of enjoyed being plain or even just ugly to some people. I didn't want the unwanted attention other girls would get. I liked blending in to the background.

After being into lolita, I realize how pretty and cute I can be. I've learned a great deal about makeup, lost a lot of my weight to fit into bruando. I learned how to dress in a way where I can still look elegant and cute with my body, and learned to pose in a way for photos where it's not apparent that I can probably pick you up and toss you.

You'd be surprised what you can accomplish when you try.

>> No.8554543

I would love to be a penpal with anyone here. The fact that you were interested enough to click a lifestyle lolita thread is enough for me! I was trying to get a few of my normie friends to send letters with me but they all have the same response- it's either too much effort or they don't see the point. If anyone is interested, let me know and I'll post my e-mail so we can exchange addresses away from prying eyes. I live in Canada if that makes any difference.

>> No.8556244
File: 277 KB, 540x809, tumblr_nrqu4kp4Q21qlhxg5o1_540.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Bumping the thread. I need some lifestyle inspo.
Here's a picture for your troubles.

>> No.8557406
File: 1.89 MB, 2592x1456, IMG_20150521_122118673.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Still interested! Reality has gotten really boring and with school coming back in session while I've graduated and gave no plans on going to grad school, I'm going to be a lone lolita again.

>> No.8557416

Hello! I live in America and would love to have a penpal. I've been wanting to write letters and have a reason to buy nice paper and stationary. I actually had a lolita penpal a couple years ago, but we stopped writing and I feel terrible about it. She was from Canada, too.

>> No.8557423

Good luck getting your blog going, anon. I am looking forward to seeing music and cooking posts.

>> No.8558187

Just curious, but what is your favorite part of the lifestyle thing?

For me, it's being able to take part in feminine activities that before Lolita, I used to feel embarrassed about. Now I feel proud of them instead.

>> No.8558339

I think I like the concept of taking one's time and enjoying life's little pleasures and moments. Don't get me wrong, I like modern conveniences and I wouldn't trade living in this century for the past, but it's things like overuse if technology and millenial problems that make it hard to stop and smell the roses.

I've been thinking about blogging about the concept of living in the moment - free from the distraction of a screen; free of worry about the past and the future. It sounds so Buddhist just wording like that which isn't really a bad thing, but of course I'd want to put it in a romantic lifestyle spin. I'm thinking of writibg on the following topics:

>Eating like the French
Comparing French and American eating habits and views on food

Talking about the problem of cellphone usage in a theatrical space

>Acting Topics
Even though I wasn't an acting major, I took acting classes and learned a lot about the concept of living in the moment, but there are also other useful lessons that I'd like to share that I think would be useful for lolita and just being a person.

And then there are fillers like ootd, package openings, meetup/con reports, reviews ( although, I'd like to do reviews for things like restaurants/tea houses, shows, etc), antique shop finds, et al.

>> No.8558343

Aw. I'm in murica too. My only penpal was from the UK, but we didn't correspond much. This was back when Shelby Cloud did a sticker trade iirc. I'd love to swap letters and small gifts like stickers and tea samples.

>> No.8558354

I agree 100% about the little pleasures and living in the moment. Lately for me I've realized that's the most important part of the lifestyle aspect for me.

>> No.8558717

I'm the OP of the thread, and I agree about little pleasures. I feel like Lifestyle Lolita culture encourages a person to enjoy the little things in life that make it beautiful. I also have some interest in being present and living in the moment.

I seriously think all Lolitas could use more of these types of thoughts on a regular basis, lifestyler or not. I feel like the fashion would be a happier place if more people could think a little bit more positively.

>> No.8560510

I made an e-mail, [email protected] Anyone who is interested is welcome to message it! Maybe include how often you want to send letters and what you want to write about so that we can pair up with someone who has similar interests.

You know you're lazy when you use yahoo purely so that you don't have to log out of your actual hotmail account to make a new one

>> No.8560574 [DELETED] 

You turned it into heavily sexualized hobby, like you girls always do.

>> No.8560609


Hey there. I'm >>8557416, and I sent a message to the penpal email. I hope the rest of you can join up as well and we can all get matched up.

>> No.8560613

That would be really cool! I'm in Europe btw. And fb has a lolita penpal group.
>not much cute stationery letters yet
>feel sad man

>> No.8560864
File: 1.23 MB, 2592x1456, IMG_20150715_162622016.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Whee! I just sent a reply. Im hyped.

>> No.8561321
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I know it's a bit off-topic but I found an account of skye and it says the last time she was active wasJan 29 2015.She also uses an account picture that looks like pic related.So I guess she's not dead or tattooed.

>> No.8562465

As much as I'd love to know the account, I want to ask you don't give it away.

I loved Skye and her works and would follow her to the end of the world if I could, but she obviously wanted to get away from Lolita and the attention and I feel like it would be wrong to out wherever she's found her new internet home.

>> No.8562481

But I hope it's okay if I reminisce about her.

She seemed like she was interested in so many of the same things I was, and I was always an outcast in school and didn't have any friends because of my "weird" interests, so to find someone with a similar interests and personality made me feel like I wasn't a freak after all and that I'm not alone. Her blog taught me that I didn't have to hide who I am inside just because other people might think it's weird, and I honestly always loved the "princess" philosophy and think that the sentiment that every girl is a princess if she wants to be is very sweet and can even be empowering even though so many people loathed it. I grew up reading a lot of books and fairy tales and still enjoy them to this day, so maybe that's why I'm so fond of it when other's weren't.

I really hope she's happy in life now. She helped me to be a happier person and so I'd like to see the same for her.

>> No.8564605
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This photo set of her is so beautiful honestly. I'm glad she left Lolita and found something she's more comfortable with.

I don't like the name "lifestyle Lolita" because a person might wish to leave the fashion (something I'm actually probably going to do soon), but I and most lifestylers have romantic hobbies or dispositions that drew us to Lolita in the first place, so the lifestyle part never really goes away even if you leave the clothes. Romantic lifestyle is a more suitable word for it, for sure, because it doesn't stop when Lolita does.

>> No.8564651

How do you know that's her? A reverse google image search points to a profile that has no information on it other than "Female" "Libra" and "Australia"

>> No.8564663

It's literally a picture she used on the blog she did after Princess Portal. Did none of you guys ever go to her new blog while it was still around?

>> No.8564919

She's not into Lolita at all now, just regular fashion and crafts. She has a serious job.

>> No.8564965

Just curious, but do you actually know her then? I knew she was done with Lolita, but I always thought she'd be one of those people who kept one or two of their most loved pieces to keep wearing even after they leave. Do you know if she's still into vintage and romantic style clothes, or did she leave that too?
Sorry, I don't mean to pry so much, I'm just curious. She was a huge role model for me.

>> No.8565006

>I don't mean to pry so I'm gonna pry

>> No.8565009


>> No.8565322

Besides Skye, were there any other lolitas who influenced you lifestyle wise For me it was Lolita Charm, written by Victoria Suzanne. I know there was a little drama involving her at one point, but I enjoyed her writing up until recently and she really made the fashion feel accessible to me and gave me a way to feel and become involved, and gave me the courage to finally buy my first outfit. If Skye was my role model, Victoria was like my mentor.

>> No.8566995
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I like to write fairy tales whilst wearing lolita. Its easier to write about princesses when you feel like one.

>> No.8567104
File: 54 KB, 450x600, 2700138536_2f34d3df2f_o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

This thread is so inspiring - I decided to start my own lifestyler-related blog, too! It'll mostly be personal, detailing my handmade lolita crafts/projects, outfits, and inspiring movies/books/etc. and things like that. I think putting effort into a blog recording my activities will help inspire me to do MORE of those activities, incorporating more lifestyle things into, well, my life...

>> No.8567126

Bless this thread, I love reading up on everything posted here so far, I feel inspired already.

>> No.8567388

>Some basic rules...
>>always maintain your honer and dignity

Can we learn how to spell first?

>> No.8567393

>What helped "kill" lolita (AKA make it more mainstream) was the mass exodus to mainstream sites like Tumblr and Facebook

No, what made it mainstream was the constant exposure in weeaboo venues and cheap brand copies.

>> No.8567697
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I don't have anything to contribute right now. I guess I'm just hoping somebody else does, this thread hasn't gotten much attention in the last few days and I have posted a few times and feel like I've said all I could without repeating myself.

I have a cute embroidery idea page though, for anyone out there who embroiders. I've been meaning to pick up the hobby some time, but I don't really have anything I can embroider and don't want to do the whole decorative wall hanging embroidery thing, I prefer functional stuff.

>> No.8568076

This is adorable! Id love to learn to do this!

>> No.8568116

It would be quite a feat if someone could maintain a boner AND their dignity. I guess it'd be easier in Lolita, though.

>> No.8568124
File: 263 KB, 716x582, embroidered blouses.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Do you have your blog up yet? I always love finding new lifestyler blogs. Please share it here, if you can.

That's really nice. I've always wanted to write lolita stories, but I just am never inspired. Maybe it turns out I need to be frilly first.

I don't know what your tastes are, but I really love the look of embroidered blouses like in the picture. It just seems like such a wonderful detail to elevate a blouse. Maybe you could embroider blouse collars (even of normal/work shirts) to start with the hobby?

>> No.8568765

Oh This is a good idea! I don't know if I could do anything beautiful enough to put on a blouse without more practice but I love the idea of it.

>> No.8572532
File: 452 KB, 1000x600, tumblr_m9s7sg2eUR1rxxqcqo1_1280.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Bumping! Don't want this thread to die.

>> No.8572652

That little owl plush in the background is precious.


Has anyone had a reply about getting a penpal?

>> No.8572735

I really want to post in egl. Im so nostalgic for old school and the lifestyle. Though i never considered myself a lifestyler, others in my comm do. Lolita just happens to fit along the things i love to do. Im not sure what to post though. Tea sets? My lolita crafts? A weekly themed post? But i dont know what exactly.

>> No.8572813

I'd be up for a general tea post (tea sets, but also tea recommendations) or a craft post on there.

>> No.8572979
File: 398 KB, 550x453, ladies-liquor.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


Pic unrelated, but kinda funny

Go for it, anon.
I know it's tough to deal
with the idea of doing things "wrong", not being / doing something the way others have agreed on as "right" or people judging you for leaving the proverbial well beaten path. Just keep in mind no matter what, you are living your life. You do what is best for you and if someone doesn't like it, good for them. They aren't you living your life so your choices have zip to do with them. There's always gonna be people who never grew out of their juvenile collective instinct of being social / fashion police, don't let standards or rules stop you from doing what makes you happy and comfortable.

>> No.8573005

Do you have a blog anon? I would love to read about your lolita slice of life.

>> No.8573062

No. I've considered it though. I guess I just dont have much time now adays. I do a lot of events within my community organizing meetups, planning panels and tea parties at the local conventions. I'm getting married next year so I plan on taking a year off for that. Only attending things rather then hosting. Maybe I'll start blogging again then. I use to use blogger years ago, though I'm not sure which the best site to use now is. Something that is also mobile friendly since i like to jolt things down on the go, and edit later.
Likewise, I am very interested in following new people. The people I use to follow when I was still blogging have long since stopped blogging, or have left lolita.

>> No.8573065
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Yes, it just has one post right now. I kinda nervous sharing it on /cgl/ but I guess everyone in this thread has the same feeling I do, so, whatever - pintucksandlace on blogspot.

I love this! I've been doing embroidery on and off for the past couple of years, but I find most of the patterns either too grandma-y or not to my taste, but I really like this one. I might try it out! Thanks for sharing!

>> No.8573960

I've noticed that most embroidery patters really aren't so nice. If I ever get into it, and I really do want to, I would like to just sort of freestyle once I get enough practice, but I love this little tea set embroidery, and since I love to drink tea I thought maybe I could make some sort of coaster set, or a pouch to keep teas in while I travel using those patterns

>> No.8574026
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She has a new blog? Sauce?

I haven't gotten anything except for a notice that OP was going to wait a few days to see if she'd get any more people interested in being penpals.

>> No.8574753

/had/ a new blog. It's gone now. When she decided to leave Princess Portal she told everyone and gave out a link to her new blog, but she left the new one too after a few years. I can't figure out how people didn't see it when she told everyone she was making a new blog twice. It was called the Lost Princess.

>> No.8574766
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This is blog-anon from before - So last night I decided to embroider a simple teapot, I think it came out pretty cute!

>> No.8574813

I don't get this post at all, anon. You do understand you can have mainstream tumblrites in your fashion, but also have a little clan of lifestyle lolitas that don't conform to how they are at all. The fashion has always been polarized like this. There's the fame whores, drama whores, etc. and then there's the lifestylers that have always been more toned down and have a deeper connection to the clothes. I really believe these loyal lifestyle types are the blood of lolita and don't get enough credit like you, but consider the mainstream side a blessing. They funnel money into your fashion and keep it thriving.

If you want more handmade clothing, arts/movies/whatever, then funnel it into the handmade clothing subgroup and the lifestyle groups. You have to make your bubble and build it up if you want it so much.

>> No.8575445
File: 23 KB, 500x263, Joyful-Room-Decoration-Idea2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Ohhh, no, I misread. I remember Lost Princess. I thought you meant that she has a new blog, now that she's done with lolita and having more "normal" interests.

I guess she really is done with the internet?

>> No.8576446
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Maybe we should do a lolita penpal thread?
I find very frustating to struggle finding people really into lifestyle because they are less popular and unnoticed, usually the more vocal ones aren't into lifestyle (except few of them) and are just attention seekers or flaunting their newest popular print or the most flawless coordinate. I noticed lots of these aren't into lifestyle, dress the fashion only for shoots/meets and even outside lolita have very normalfag hobbies or fashion style. Or they are big weebs into some tumblrina fashion.
I could be wrong, by the way.

Ah, finally i want to get back into baking sweets, of the "kawaii" type. Too bad macarons are too hard to do at home.I should bake cat donuts instead.

>> No.8576576

You know, I really feel you there too. Even though I said to make your own bubble, it's hard when others and even own lolitas conflict with you. I'm a lifestyler and just decided this very, very recently. I was always sort of it in spirit, I suppose, but just decided to finally use the term. I was very lukewarm with lolita and being so casual in it recently, I think because I believed it had so little heart to it. I just got a dream dress recently and it sort of reignited my love for it.

I've read more than once that Japan is more lifestyle oriented. Lolita clashes much more with their culture over there in certain ways (what's just cute frilly clothes to us, possibly inspired by our culture is "rebellious" and "western" over there.) and dedicating to lolita is something like a lifestyle choice. It seems to be more default "lolita is lifestyle" over there rather than just "clothes". There's a certain admiration for "western" culture, to put it vaguely, they seem to adopt upon themselves, like refinement and romanticism I don't see lots of lolitas over here take up at all. I was reading not horribly long ago that gyaru and lolita just cannot mix. It's interesting because despite being so big and beside eachother for years over there, they never truly mingled. It was because lolita was treated as a lifestyle choice and the "lifestyle" aspects of a gyaru. Mixing them wasn't seen as very possible at all by gyaru or lolita since the lifestyles were day and night.

>> No.8576578

Maybe that's the foreign issues with lolita? The gyaru experience varies per sub-fashion, but I'd describe it overall as being a type of party girl or even bad girl, but I think most over here saw it as a type of clothing and makeup. It's not as if foreign gyaru could go to parapara clubs and hang with host boys over here. Maybe similarly, there's some "lost in translation" with lolita and there's important subtext to lolita that gets lost on us. Lolita is practically an abandonment of the traditional Japanese culture (which I think could translate most places easily), taking on a very romanticized view of the world and refining yourself, and overall sort of creating your own beautiful world that the outside world clashes with severely.

I think I'll grab some official stuff on lifestyle and try to find some of these things I read long ago. I really believe there's so much more basis for lifestyle in their rules, especially in things like the GLB, than there is here.

>> No.8577530


Her Lost Princess blog was her "leaving" Lolita officially I think.

Yeah, she seems to be truly done with the net. It's sad but I do feel for her and understand how she feels completely.

Sorry if I sounded snotty too, I didn't mean to come off that way but realize it could sound like that.

>> No.8577694
File: 1.47 MB, 1697x2335, teastuffglb2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Eh, you're not as bad as the customers I've dealt with at work.

I just got mine. Apparently, only one other person had replied and so I'm paired with her. I'm working on my letter as well.

I find it funny that I had gotten a stationary set with only two pieces of letter length paper in it; I guess that's what I get for going to estate sales.

btw, I've gotten around setting up a blog; I'll probably post it later in a future lolita/cosplay blog thread or something.

>> No.8577848

This is super adorable, anon!

>> No.8578025
File: 1.34 MB, 1697x2335, teastuffglb3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

lilythefrilly blogspot

Eh, put it up anyway. I honestly didn't think I'd get around it until later, but realized that I have a long work week ahead of me so I figured that I'd start it now. I'll mess with the settings later since I don't really care for this layout. I want to focus on posting asap (I've got a few meet ups to cover).

>> No.8578298

Yes, i feel the same when i try to mingle with lolitas. I find finally someone that is interested into a lifestyle, it's something!I always admired lolita due to its supposed connected lifestyle, when i was younger i induged to check stuff about it, finding interesting lolita insights and the overall fashion was more into a lifestyle. My personality seems also very suitable for the lifestyle and one of the few that doesn't involve stupid rebellious stuff like drugs, unsafe sex and other elements. It's more an inner thing that refine your soul and at the same time rebel into the mainstream ideals. The romantic lifestyle was more a thing in the past in Western countries, now people lost it's value for this we see destructive or non productive behaviour into some alt or mainstream cultures. Gyaru seems like the "spoiled popular princess" lifestyle, for this lolitas don't want to mix with them in Japan.
Also, the lolita fashion is a rebellious way to gain independence and not cater to men's needs/glance.In Japan the view of the women is more traditional, lolita become like a feminist thing to dress only for themselves and not to men or society.I always loved this, it's one of the few styles that totally banish male's gaze and being feminine is seen as empowering not weak.

>> No.8578302

That is awesome anon!I just need more stationery paper, all i have is some Emily The Strange letter set. Cute yes, but wish there would be more gothic lolita-ble letter sets.
I can't wait to read your blog!

>> No.8579319
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I got into Lolita during high school, but I never wore the fashion because I couldn't afford it. I read a couple of lolita blogs, including Skye's, and adored the lifestyle, but I never participated in it because back then all my friends were "edgy" and I was afraid of them judging me and not wanting to be friends anymore. Now I'm in my mid 20's and I just decided to finally try wearing Lolita regularly, maybe once a week to start and if things go well maybe a couple times a week, and would like to participate in the lifestyle also. But when I tried I found that I felt childish and foolish, and I feel like I don't have much free time to devote to it. Can I please get some advice on what I should do? I'm really passionate about the lifestyle thing but just don't know how to participate as a grown adult and even though I don't mind playing a little pretend in good fun and I feel like I have the romantic personality that fits the lifestyle, I feel ridiculous because people my age aren't suppose to enjoy or do things like that and there's not as much time in the day for all the things I want and need to do.

>> No.8579392
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Thanks. Hopefully I'll actually feel motivated to keep this one up.

Have you considered making your own stationary items? Hobby Lobby sells stamps, letter paper, and envelopes that are easy to make (a little pricey, but I imagine it being pretty fun). Zazzle apparently makes customized ones too, and Aliexpress sells some pretty gothic inspired sets.

Aw. You're totally me, minus wearing lolita regularly. Doing all of those things are hard to do and I understand not having much time - I mean, I work two jobs and when I do have free time in between, all I want to do is sleep or browse online. I think one thing I've taken away from school is learning how to manage time and making time for things and making time to slow down and step away from the screen is key to participating in lifestyle activities, even if it's just 10 minutes to prepare and enjoy some tea.

As for other people, I wouldn't worry about feeling ridiculous because it's not mainstream/age appropriate. Lolita fashion isn't mainstream and you still enjoy it, right? I feel like lolita, like any subculture, is simply a big fuck you to what's supposed to be mainstream.

Over the course of this thread, I think we've come to the conclusion that there's no real right or wrong way to have lifestyle aspects as a lolita. I have to get ready for work now, but your post inspired me to think of fun ideas as to how to make your life a little sweeter (I think FYeahLolita might have done something like it,but I'll check later). I'll work up a list of things while I'm working.

>> No.8579398

I guess I'm a little confused at your question. You feel childish and foolish for dressing in lolita and/or participating in "lifestyle" type activities? Maybe it's not for you, then? Or you're pursuing the wrong type of activities... for example, the aspects of lifestyle that I like are more Georgian or Victorian inspired activities - embroidery, tea, sewing, light nature walks, bird-watching, etc. These activities fit easily into my adult life since I was already interested in these types of things/fit them into my life before lolita. Lolita was a natural "fit" aesthetically for my life.

What activities do you mean make you feel childish/foolish? For me, none of it is "playing pretend," or anything like that. I may have a daydreamy tendency, but I'm not actively "playing pretend" as I did when I was a child or anything... is that what you imagine lifestyler activities to be? You say "I feel ridiculous because people my age aren't supposed to enjoy or do things like that.." Like what? All the things I mentioned that I enjoy are totally acceptable for people my age (twenties) and I have several lolita friends who participate in them, as well...

I sympathize with lack of time aspect, but again, these "lifestyler" things are already my hobbies, so in my free time I find ways to fit them in. For work and school I usually express it in the clothing I wear (lolita or general romantic j-fashion styles, luckily my job doesn't have a strict dress code) and the items I use (purses/backpacks, notebooks, etc.) and in my off-time I enjoy arts & crafts with a "lifetsyle" feel, reading/writing, etc. etc.

>> No.8579427


what happened to Skye?

The Lost Princess was my world. It was where I escaped. I crafted a wardrobe, a lifestyle, even my art from it's magic. I'd come home and watch Jane Marple and read Oscar Wilde.


I used to keep a blog similar, and told stories too.
So much nostalgia. I really long for that world. I wish that when she left she kept up her things. Her blog, her goodreads, her tumblr everything is gone.

She made my loneliness seem like a fairytale.

Now that i'm older i need it more than anything. Life is a bitch.

>> No.8579458

here's a lookbook i think skye had


>> No.8579592

I think all Lolitas need to take that last line to heart.

>Enjoy it, explore it, define it - don’t let it define you.

>> No.8579718
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It is so hard these days to find time to yourself. I do find it hard to disconnect from the internet anymore, so maybe not allowing myself on as often would give me more time to do other things. It seems like I need to go online for almost everything though, for inspiration, information, and talking to my friends. Thanks so much for your thoughts. I'll check out FYeahLolita and see if I can find the article you're talking about.

I don't feel childish dressing in Lolita, just for participating in the lifestyle. I don't embroider or sew but I do the other things you mentioned and they are things I've always been interested in. I guess maybe I'm just not as romantically inclined as I used to be. Maybe doing things that are out of the norm feels like playing pretend now that I'm older. Maybe it's the self indulgence that feels like pretend. I don't really know how to explain it.

>> No.8579757

Are you me?

The Lost princess was more important to me than Princess Portal was. I have always been a lonely person (living somewhere I don't fit in with, my only friend moved out of the country and I cant make any new ones, and prior to her I had no friends my entire life). Her blog indeed made my loneliness feel like a fairy tale. I wish that she would have kept her blogs up too, even if they will never be updated again. Even if her later posts were getting more and more melancholy compared to how her blog started, they somehow left me feeling like I had a gift, and positive instead of sad and sorry for myself.

>Now that i'm older i need it more than anything. Life is a bitch.

Same. I need that magic in my life again. It helped me in a world where I feel like nothing helps and nobody quite understands.

>> No.8579774
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Oops, I'm >>8579757. I didn't finish writing all I wanted to say.

>>8564919 If this is true, this is your answer. I would like to know what exactly happened to her and why, and would like to know more about who and where she is now, but even if somebody knew I'm sure nobody would answer out of respect for Skye's privacy, which is understandable.

Personally, I think she left for a couple different reasons, especially after re-reading her final Lost Princess posts. I think that she wanted to leave her Lolita past completely behind her, but felt like it was still following her. I think she also started to want more privacy as she got older. Maybe she even felt insecure about herself, or was uncomfortable with how many fans she had. Part of me wonders if maybe something happened in her life that was a major change that would have made her want to disappear from the internet, especially since her posts got so weary towards the end.

>> No.8580565

That's really interesting in an ominous kind of way

>> No.8580572

I think people just do it through the ask box?

>> No.8580613

For me, lifestyle is trying to capture that strange, nostalgic sweetness I get from watching the scene in A Little Princess when she 'imagines' all the food, or the dark yet charming atmosphere from A Series of Unfortunate Events.

The same feeling you get in antique stores when you're surrounded by old leather chairs and fancy desks and the like. Maybe the line between fantasy and reality? As long as you're still capable of getting a job and functioning in 'normal' situations, this kind of dreaminess is fine.

I think it's a similar romanticism that draws people to steampunk and goth and fairies; when you apply it practically, it just means immersing yourself using clothing, food, locations, and activities.

If you genuinely enjoy any of those things, then it's not fake.

I think you can be acceptable to average society and also be interested in this kind of thing.

>> No.8582693

This is sort of my view on the lifestyle too.

>> No.8582742
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>> No.8582753
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Thank you. I may someday give it a try. For science!

>> No.8582785

Just pass you free time the best you can!Wear your favourite lolita coord even with cute slippers, drink tea while reading a good book, surf the web and listen to "lolita" appropriate music... there are many little ways to lifestyle your life in a short time span or no time for hobbies like sewing or baking.
I feel the same, i felt always different from others having more social interests while i always had more indoor hobbies and a bit nerdy. Or not into the YOLO tooedgyforme life at all. It seems lolita lifestyle is a way to get back into a world where you feel safe, infact lolita is becoming my safe harbor where i can forget my pain and hardships of some failed relationships that crumbled my self sense. Lolita would heal finally my soul.
That sounds like a really good idea, thank you!I wear lots of black but i have pastel or colourful deco in my study/room because i can't find spooky cute deco. Like Kuromi stuff.
I never find gothic sets on Aliexpress, i only bought some black stationery like a polkadot mech pencil and a bear pen.

>> No.8582823


Aww anons are both of you me?I felt all my life lonely, often with no friends and it seems everyone has a good social life but me. Now i have hopefully friends i don't go out much or i'm social a lot but being into lolita lifestyle i feel finally happier. Life is a bitch really, for now i see only the fog but lolita is the little spark out of it. I'm glad to have more people like me!

>> No.8584122

That's why I love Lolita, it feels like the spark of hope for me in the fog of how crappy and hard life is. I think maybe I'm moving on from Lolita but I'll always be inspired by it and the lifestyle will always be a part of me.

>> No.8585861

The little spark of life in this deadly exsistence!But well if you move on from lolita you can still have your lifestyle at least. I'm not wearing much lolita due to lack of events, being more a loner and having just busy prints. My life isn't that bad if you see on the surface, but i'm always turned down by people and it seems the only genuine thing in this life are lolita and my hobbies.

>> No.8586860

Ive been thinking about getting back into blogging, and re-vamp my old blog. What would you like to see in an old school/lifestyle blog? Reminiscing of older releases/trends, antiquing adventures? Tea cup collections? Ootds for general daily outfits, not just fancy/event coords?

>> No.8587895

>Tea cup collections
There's 50 trio sets at my house. God help me.

>> No.8587899

Please post anon

>> No.8587932

They're in storage boxes right now. I might post later if I get the time

>> No.8588004

Maybe a throwback post like on egl_Lj??Lolita appropriate baking goods?

>> No.8591736

bumping because I don't think I can post what I want to before the thread gets knocked off

>> No.8591845

I'm not feeling well today, so I'm sorry if this isn't a good quality response. I'll try to think of what I love about lifestyle blogs, and I'll try to think about what I'd do if I had one. (I want one but don't have the energy to run one)

The things I enjoyed the most about lifestyle blogs were the way they made daily life seem like a fairy tale. Real life is dreadful, Lolita lifestyle blogs were my escape and I used to rely on them for inspiration on how to make my own life more of a fairy tale. Focus on what makes you unique as a person and showcase things you find interesting. I think you should try to wear a pair of rose-tinted glasses when you write.

I liked a mix of journal-like posts (think PrincessPortal) and advice posts (think FYeahLolita). I want to see how you live your Lolita lifestyle, but I also want some occasional advice or ideas on how I can live mine too.

I like to see things with a Lolita flavor besides Lolita fashion. Things like décor, out of Lolita clothing, media, food. To me, being a lifestyle Lolita means bringing Lolita elements to the rest of your life, so if you have anything like that to share, such as your teacup collection or just pretty pictures, I recommend that you do.

I like reminiscing once in a while, but I prefer bloggers to think in the present. I do A TON of reminiscing about the good old days, and I need to stop and try to bring what I love about them to my present instead of just living in nostalgia. One thing I'd like to see from a lifestyle blog is a "timeless" feeling. It's a bit difficult to explain what I mean, but I guess I'd prefer someone to o what they enjoy regardless of time or trend, and I prefer a blog that can be re-read and adored in the future just as well as in the present. Make sure you find a balance between the past and the present, and keep future readability in mind.

>> No.8591850

>>8586860 >>8591845 cont.

OOTD are appreciated, especially when they showcase daily appropriate outfits and unique outfits for special occasions. I don't recommend doing it everyday though. Maybe one outfit feature a week is more reasonable, or if you post less often, maybe once or twice a month at the most. You want to showcase your style but you want your blog to be about more than that. Try to take outfit shots that are more than basic mirror shots too. One thing I liked about older Lolita was how many people took cute and creative pictures of their outfits. I'm so tired of mirror shots and basic cute poses.

Remember that it's your blog, so you should write about whatever you want to. Have fun with it. Sometimes I read a blog and it feels like the writer just couldn't care less or isn't enjoying themselves and it makes me wonder why they would force themselves to write. It's no fun for the reader if it isn't fun for the writer too.

I guess that's about all I can think of right now. I hope that was at least somewhat helpful. Good luck on reviving your blog!

>> No.8594026
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Lifestyle advice from Parfaitdoll/Lolita Charm:

"No matter what you decide is an important facet in your lifestyle definition, I think i can safely say they’re all about adding something beautiful. The key is spotting these moments in your life and acting on them. One could almost call it pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone, or pushing yourself to change your life. For example, maybe you’re shy, but your idea of a lifestyle lolita is that she brightens the day of perfect strangers. Make it your mission to coax a smile out of everyone you meet that day! (God Mode: Try this next time you’re at the airport. Hardest mission ever!) Or if you discover a place that makes a perfect chai is right next to your office, take a little ‘me time’ break and grab one. Pick yourself wildflowers; tote around something like a Jane Austen novel to read on the train. If you idea of lifestyle lolita is all about dark roses and baroque music, keep a CD of it in the car for your commute. These little additions, things to make you smile – that, to me, is what lifestyle is all about. First, decide what you want, and why; then decide how to work it into your real life."

>> No.8594352

This is my perfect idea of a lifestyle lolita. It isn't necessarily the large things, but the little things a lolita does to stay true to herself that makes her a lifestyler.

>> No.8594503

Would people be interested in a lifestyle-type youtube channel? I'm not really cut out for a blog, but I'd like to make videos. I was think a series on lolita/romantic media, little touches to your everyday life, etc.

>> No.8595108

YES I am interested, I am interested in blogs, youtubes, literally anything lifestyle. I dunno about other people but I think videos would do well, they aren't as "out of date" as blogs are.

>> No.8595511

I would be very interested as well! Please do it and of course post here!

>> No.8595714

Are there any spinning lolitas out there? just started learning how and it's fascinating, plus sitting at the wheel I feel very fairytale like :)

>> No.8595772

Ooooh that sounds lovely actually. I am not at all but I do find the process fascinating and think it would be fun to try one day. Do you knit or crochet? I don't do either, unfortunately I don't have the patience for it, though I was taught the basics of knitting once when I was younger. I think it would be cool to spin and knit your own things.

>> No.8595868

I assumed they meant being a DJ until I read your reply.

>> No.8595872

No, I literally made one just for getting more into lolita. I was into the fashion for years and never fully committed.

Add me please! leigh99

>> No.8595875

>Implying being adorably girly isn't punk af now that the punk aesthetic has been coopted by normies.

Actual punks would love you wearing lolita because it rebels against how trashy society is now

>> No.8595876

Punks were never against how trashy society is, but it's more about rebelling against being told to be a certain way and being content with status quo.

>> No.8595882

That would be interesting!I believe i never saw any lolita dj or i'm missing something. In Japan there are many female dj that dress in jfashions, i bet someone wear lolita fashion but i'm unaware!
>mfw broken dream that never came true
It's the best advice, small little lifestyle things added everyday to change your life make a real big change. I'm trying to do the same but many things happens in my mind and heart that i forget about the small beautiful things for a lolita lifestyle.

>> No.8595901

I like you, too. There's nothing fake about having manners. Not sure when being offensive and rude became desirable

>> No.8595909

Sorry I'm an idiot, after I got to the bottom of the thread I realized none of you were using LJ

>> No.8598257

No, I don't knit or crochet. I was taught when I was younger like yourself but think its forgotten now... But I do like to do cross stitch and embroidery. I was hoping I can pass the wool onto some of my friends who knit.

Give spinning a go, you don't need a wheel, there are drop spindle kits on etsy or ebay for under ten euro's.

>> No.8598391
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That'd be adorable. I wish my brother kept his dj set before he moved out of state. I would have loved to learn how to use the turntable. I think I would make trip-hop music.


Man...I forget how hard it is to keep up a blog. It sucks that I've been working 10 hour shifts so I've been too exhausted to be up writing. Hopefully I'll get around it on my day off. I want to aim for small and frequent blog posts. Maybe something like poetry of the day or lolita lifestyle bit of the day (add a little frill in your day! - Agh, words, how do they work?).

aww. We should swap lj names and start an old school lolita comm on lj. I remember someone talking about it a while ago and I'd be up for it.

>> No.8599699

If i had the skills to create music i would create dark electro/industrial tunes, with my own vocals!I would have use some "lolita related" lyrics but no... not like Misako did with her musical project Lolitina (too much sugar coated!), more life metaphors, Alice in Wonderland references or distorted fairytales, etc.
Your brother is going further into his career?
About lolita blogging, i have plenty time but how i'm lately isn't the best condition to make a blog, i should brainstorm ideas for a future lifestyle blog instead. And buy more lolita items.

>> No.8600243

Not dj-ing much anymore, but he works at a recording company as a sound engineer. Actually, if I was a lot more ambitious, I'd love to master guitar and learn how to use pedals. I've been in a bit of a shoegaze kick lately. Idk how lolita lifestyle appropriate that kind of music is since people tend to associate it with classical and visual-kei and jpop, but I like the heavy droning of guitars with soft, almost indeciferable vocals. I guess dream pop or twee would be closer to a sweet lolita feel. Like you, I don't really like Misako's music project nor am I appealed to sugary imagery. I feel like lolita gives out a more nuanced feeling than simply kawaii.

>> No.8600379

That is cool about your brother!!I like some "kawaii" music that tend to be electropop (Vocaloids for example)but i feel everyone in their lolita lifestyle choose the music they love to fit the lifestyle and not force themselves to like something they despise. I'm not a fan of classical music, i like some visual kei artists that play other music genres (like Schwarz Stein and Kaya, pretty "gothic lolita for me)or akin to dark electro. Visual kei imo would have be more successful if more people choose different music genres instead of metal or rock.
I wonder what lifestylers listen here on cgl!

>> No.8600923
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Ah fellow shoegaze fan lolita here! I'd love to chat with you!

>> No.8600940
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I also like twee, I think the post punk going into twee (ironic/ creepy sweet) stuff from beat happening is quite old school 'lolita' to me in the concept, though maybe not the most lolita sound with Calvin's vocals.

>> No.8601405
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Does this mean that Skye is still around somewhere?

>> No.8601615


Was a punk before I was a Lolita. Can conform that that extreme femininity and slightly dark twist of Lolita fashion is punk AF.
Honestly I feel more punk as a Lolita than I did back when I was a punk.

>> No.8602408

I consider myself a "lifestyle" lolita, in that I wear Lolita as much as I can (but not in the French Quarter of New Orleans in the middle of the summer), live in a house built in the mid 1800s and generally enjoy antique furniture and "doll-type" things. However I think having an appreciation for classical music, literature, architecture and art kind of just makes you a well-rounded person and it's silly to try and fit the mold of "lifestyler" if you aren't GENUINELY interested in that kind of thing. I like pretty old things, but sometimes I just want to wear an O-Mighty top and go to the bar. I like collecting hardcore records. I work at a strip club. And I've been in the fashion since 2005. Even fairy tale princesses have hobbies and interests and lives outside of enchanted forests and finding a prince.

>> No.8603707

Well, not every princess need to find a prince to feel like this infact! I like old fashioned stuff, especially from period end 800s-first 1900s decades, being interested into vintage furniture miniature and other loliable hobbies, BUT i love futuristic themes at the same time.... cyborgs, transhumanism, aliens, electronic futuristic music. I would like to create a futuristic lolita coord, but it's a real challenge because the fashion is mainly influences by historical fashion.
I'm glad you can live your idea of lifestyle lolita without having issues to getting together opposite things. Creating a good balance.

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