/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>10344897
spagheti

>>10344901
What kind? Go wild!

Why the fuck you ain't just ask me what do I want to eat?

>>10344926
More fun this way desu.

big ass fries

>>10344897
>Fois Gras Crostini, Cherry Chutney
>Lobster Red Bell Pepper Bisque
>Duck Conifit Salad Sub, Arugula Baby Spinach
>Tiramisu
>Pina Colada

Ask what the hottest new snack is that's popular with all the kids these days is, and also try to get some unlimited cucumber and enough sushi to kill myself through mercury poisoning.

I just ate so I'd be picking like just some oranges

>>10344937
Nice, good stuff. More like this!

>>10344897
Ham and cheddar lean pockets (2)

>>10345110
>not turkey and broccoli

A platter of raw oysters with lemon and horseradish, shrimp cocktail, a whole lobster, zuppa de pesce, and a Chardonnay

>>10344897
The strongest alcohol the future has to offer

>>10344897
bacalhau the way my mom makes it because i'd probably be a wreck realizing she is dead

>>10345152
>vegetables
top kek wew lad

>>10344897
fish and chips
pea and ham
steak and veggies
french vanilla cheesecake
bundy and coke

>>10344897
>hear about different wars in last 200 years
>Eugenics wars
>World War 3
Ask to try MREs from these wars

>>10345319
>given the advent of portable field kitchens MRE's were eliminated in the 2100's.

>>10345363

>>10345363
Fuck off! They had MREs in TNG

>>10344897
Nutrient paste.

>>10345375
>The Army used to have more than 4,200 MKTs back in the late 1990s, but it has now streamlined down to about 1,600.

Sorry desu but MRE's and even portable kitchens are in decline. Soldiers have vehicles and vehicles need bases for fuel and repair. Those bases have kitchens. MRE's just aren't eaten as much as in the past.

>>10344897
What a long way to go for a simple question, anyway I choose a huge fucking burger and a cherry coke but ask the machine to make them nutritionally perfect without sacrificing flavour.

>>10344897

>"replicator, make one dozen creme-filled chocolates, but with rotten mayo instead of creme."
>give them to the future people
>"these are a delicacy in my culture, if you don't eat them I'll get offended."

>>10345420
>What a long way to go for a simple question
You should see my nuclear fusion posts on /sci/!

>>10345420
you're no fun

>>10345460
Computer I'd like a bag of butter pieces!
>and a side of ranch dressing

If there are aliens, I want to try their version of a crawfish boil. If there aren’t, I’ll have a regular Earth crawfish boil.

>>10345878
I don't know what's worse.... eating butter cubes or playing The Sims in 2018.

>>10344897
Probably whatever I've been craving up to that point. So, since you're asking right now, I'd probably ask for a really great bison burger with peppered bacon, BBQ sauce, and some kind of excellent cheese. Add a side of crisp fries and a rum and coke and we're off to the races. Wrap it up with a slice of NY cheesecake with raspberry sauce. Fuck you, OP, now I want these things even more.

>>10344897
brontosaurus steak, dodo stew, tardigrade dumplings with aardvark sauce

Appetizer: Deep fried salt and pepper squid
Soup: Scottish broth
Main course: Minted lamb chops with mashed potatoes and baby corn on the cob
Dessert: semolina with jam
Drink:Port wine 10 years

>>10345921
That's Civ 5, you inbred shitstain.

>>10344897
Food replicator are a 24th century technology ya dingus.

Chicken fried steak with gravy
side container of buttered corn
mashed potatoes without skins with gravy

sand

Cheese pizza

>>10346083
Get cucked strata-meme. Your life isn't even worth a simulation. Don't spawn, not like you could anyways. Also you're a fucking faggot.

Over 20 pounds of pussy and ass

>>10346146
Anything else?

>>10346152
Wow nice angry forced comeback, trying to give him shit for a mistake you made, I think its you who is the faggot, faggot.

>>10344897
#3 extra value meal plz

>>10344897
Fuckin uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I dunno how bout a mcchicken sandwich

Sashimi appetizer followed by oysters and shrimp. Dirty martini as well

>>10345999
I've never had semolina with jam. I'll give it a try during the week

Tea, Earl Grey, Hot.

>>10344897
app: seafood chowder
soup: leek and potato
main: burrito w/ steak and grilled veg, lettuce, black beans, rice, cheese, and the spiciest salsa made from future super chillies
dessert: bread and butter pudding
drink: port

>>10344897
>They explain they have food replicator technology that can make most foods by voice command.

Giant blunt, 2 double doubles extra animal style, animal style fries with extra cheese, and a milk shake

>>10345427
The past into the present, but would it go over well?

>>10344897
appetizer: Swordfish Carpaccio
soup: Butajiru (japanese pork/miso soup)
main course: Confit de Canard
dessert: Chocolate Bingsu
drink: lychee jasmine green ice tea

>>10344897
Computer, make me a tub of whipped cream, a bucket of hot chocolate sauce, macerated strawberries and some extra large unripe bananas. Disengage safety protocols.
"Oh, Counsellor Troi, the replicator seems to be malfunctioning can you step into the room please?".

>>10345363
Fuck you, and I mean it.

>>10344897
I would ask what foods can't it make. Then I would try to order those foods and have a reeee screeching fit because it wouldn't work.

>>10344897
McDonald's fries fresh out of the fryer, piping hot, and perfectly salted
Big Mac with extra Mac sauce, replace the middle bun with a McChicken patty
A 32oz styrofoam cup full of World of Warcraft Mountain Dew Wild Fruit flavor Game Fuel

>>10344897
>you can never go back.
Computer? Can you make me some chicken with green beans and mashed potatoes, just like my mom?

>>10346807
damn, I'd save that kind of feels food for at least a week in when the homesickness really kicks in

Milkshake.
"What flavour would you like?"
Erm, beer.

>>10346807
So you want me to cook the food badly

>>10344897
a shitload of smoked herring, lobster, a few gyros, KCMO (LC's if it's that specific) slow smoked brisket, and tex mex style chile rellenos.

>>10344897
Dino nuggies, waffle fries, and lots of honey mustard sauce and some pop :^)

>>10346848
oh, and a glencrain with lagavulin 16 at the side.

>>10344897

fried dodo, seasoned with the KFC 11 herbs and spices

>>10344897

>Tea
>Earl Grey
>Hot

>>10344897
There isn't going to be any of that shit in the future on the current path that humanity is on. If I was that far into the future I would be innawoods asap, if they still existed.

>>10345363
>hey guys this is steve2289
>here we have a standard Starfleet emergency ration from 2250
>let's get this out onto a tray
>nice!

How detailed can I get? Can I ask it for the specific chocolate Coca-Cola cake my mom made once in elementary school that tasted amazing but for some reason, she lost her amazing recipe to (later attempts were good but less amazing), will it malfunction?

>>10346960
>chocolate Coca-Cola cake

DO AMERICANS REALLY

I would tell them to hold off and ask about what happen in the last 200 years.

>>10346960
You'd probably have to say something like
cake, chocolate cola
and add some description to tweak it.
ultimately it would only be an approximation

>>10347005
Same here. Would be too much in shock. What a thing to deal with!

I would go into survival mode and order as many nutrient dense bars of the future as possibe, instructing the computer to individually wrap them in plastic, and then shove them all into my pockets.

>>10347071
I'm actually more concern if the people, if they are even humans, have evolved to a point that we're just cavemen in comparison, or we might have been pick to become "animals" in a zoo.

>>10346945

I know what this is
but why doesn't he mix some of those fruit purees with the oatmeal instead of adding water?

>>10344897

>fish sticks

breakfast, soylent, hot

Shrimp scampi, a whole roast pig, chicken rice biryani, potato samosas, creme brulee, birthday cake, stuffed clams, sushi, charcoal grilled hotdogs, filet mignon, rasperry trifle, champagne truffles, eclairs, scones with clotted cream, mcdonald's french fries, a six-pack of coke, a lime rickey, and a chocolate shake.

>>10344897
Durian, to see if it can replicate the stink.

>>10344897
>order poutine and beer
>bring it to the holodeck to consume while i have hot alien babes toss my salad and suck my dick
>use active transporter to teleport poutine out of my body so i can eat it a fresh batch
>go kick the shit out of wessley with my bro worf

Chicken fried back rhino steak sandwich.

A chicken fried black rhino steak sandwich.

>>10347382
There is no deleting here.

>>10347361
>not disabling holodeck safety protocols and transporting poutine into random parts of wesley's body

Would love a couple of burgers from Game in Louisville. Specifically the alpaca burger and the kangaroo burger. Drink is PBR because it actually goes really well with both.

Alpaca burger: greens, tomato, brie, bone marrow aioli, on brioche

Kangaroo burger: greens, tomato jam, on pretzel bun

>>10344897
i would want to try future food

>>10345967
>dodo stew
>>10346911
>fried dodo, seasoned with the KFC 11 herbs and spices

sorry to be a party pooper but

>The giant tortoises unwittingly helped the dodo to go extinct. Dutch visitors to Mauritius named dodos ‘Disgusting Birds', because they tasted so horrible that even starving men could hardly stomach them. But they found they could force dodo meat down when it was dressed with tortoise oil, which was held to be 'superior in taste to that of the olive.'
>Giant tortoises helped to inspire Darwin’s theories of natural selection. Sadly, even he brought back no specimens, alive or dead, except for one juvenile pet. His crew had indeed taken dozens of tortoises on board - but they’d scoffed the lot, and chucked the remains overboard.

>whatever food and drink that ensures weightloss
>and do you have a cure for gender dysphoria?

>>10344897
Appetizer: Nicole Kidman's dirty panties
Soup: Nicole Kidman's luscious piss
Drink: Nicole Kidman's breast milk
Main course: roasted legs of Nicole Kidman
Dessert: Nicole Kidman's mons venus, vagina, and uterus, warmed to body temperature, installed in a sexbot

>>10344897
McChicken flavoured go za

>>10344897
I'd ask for what ever the best version of calorie free diet soda is. if it tastes actually like the real thing, then I think I will be ok. But if this technological utopia still hasn't figured out how to make a diet soda that isn't waxy on your teeth, then I'd know for sure that their promises of a 'need free' society are bullshit.

>>10347649
>Eating a sexbot

15 kfc nuggs
15 mcdonalds nuggs
1 mcdonalds sweet mustard sauce
1 kfc sweet and sour sauce

>>10347663
>if it tastes actually like the real thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7w0i5zfXmI

>>10347609
well, they can put like ridges on your head and flipper hands if that makes you feel better.

>>10347600
In that case, I substitue my dodo stew for a moa drumstick

>>10347678
no but like, reassigning my Y chromosome into an X chromosome, changing my skeleton, getting a real vagina and female reproductive organs and getting to live a normal life as a woman would make me feel better

you know, like Admiral Janeway did

>>10347693
the day a real x-change pill comes out is the day we achieve world peace

>>10345363
SEND ME BAAAAAACK SEND ME BACK TO THE ALMOST UNPLEASANT PAST WITH NICE HISSES

>>10344897
>You are sent 200 years into the future
i dont wanna play this game

>>10347709
>You look up Steve on historical archives, you catch up on videos you never saw as you watch him age before your eyes
>In the last videos he is shaking constantly
>he apologises for the shaking and promises to upload a new video shortly, okay cool cya
>that was his last video

>>10344897
Order a single cracker for all courses.

Then for desert I ask for a time machine.

Check and bingo.

>>10347115
Because that's not what the soldiers would have had, faggot.

>>10344897
don't forget that all the food is made out of freshly recycled poop

>>10347725

>>10346758
>reeee screeching fit because it wouldn't work.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qD4EVXkfe0w

Here you go. Enjoy.

>>10344897
>After your stomach settles down from nerves
Suspension of disbelief shattered.

>>10347725
I like to think his last video he looked young and then you see the report of botulism induced heart failure. It is better that way. He died for the things he loved.

>>10347725
I'm picturing that scen form interstellar but with noice man instead of titcow.

>>10345363
We have portable field kitchens now, chucklefuck. It's just that we'd rather eat MRE's than get food poisoning from the worthless military cooks. That, and theyre a pain in the ass to lug around and set up.

>>10348554
huh?

>Computer, serve me the worst monster in the universe!
[turns out its man]

>>10348593
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4RuB3gT8t0

>Ctrl + F
>0 matches for "Romulan ale"

>>10348661
I think it exists irl

>>10348554
You some to be confusing your diesel powered trailer kitchens with the year 2100's portable field kitchens.

>>10344897
A .45 colt with a bullet

>>10348661

Please tell me where this image is from and please tell me it's a porno

Synthale. Always wondered how it affected you compared to the real thing. IIRC you couldn't get "fucked up" drunk no matter how much of the stuff you drank.

>>10348805
It's from episode three or four of Pretty Little Liars.

>>10344897
A bowl of barbecued human clitorises generously slathered in Secret Aardvark Spicy Mayo.

>>10344897
I'd see what the cool kids on other planets ate then try and order items like hasperat.

>>10348998

Clits are meant to be poached and frequently basted, dum dum.

Roasted then seared Kelpien testicles.

>>10344928
yes, good thread.
sake, warm
Tempura sampler
Sushi assortment
sping rolls
baked alaska OR bananas foster

>>10344926
I like being given a scenario. It makes it more fun.

I guess I'd want an Indian chicken curry and a lager.

>>10348840
yeah at most you get a tiny buzz, like the first sip of an alcoholic drink but you dont even get tipsy no matter how much you drink and you dont get a hangover no matter how much you drink

>>10346843
I love you

Ortolan, clearly

>>10344897
Majel a qt
Also I'd ask for the most decadent bowl of chocolate-mint ice cream with as many toppings I can think of. Troi fucking gorged herself on that shit all the time and didn't get fat so I'll be fine.

>>10347765

he opens the MRE
that's what the soldiers would have you catamite

Gyoza
Tonkotsu Ramen
Ginger Ice cream

>>10347765
soldiers mix and match things in mres all the time, Steve occasionally does it too

>>10344897
Can I get
uhhhhhhhhh...

>>10346151
>yfw we've slipped so far down the slope by that point that an actual child comes out of the machine pussy first
>the cyber police are there to make sure that your rights to express your sexuality are well defended

>>10347657
Well done steak with ketchup.

>>10347707
The day those pills come out is the day everyone becomes a woman because who the fuck wants to be a guy, and as soon as everyone's a woman we blow our selves up

>>10348661
>ctrl+F
>[random reddit meme nobody cares about]
>"Hurrr durrr I'm the smartestest here guys"

>>10348985
Is that a porno?

It has the simplest rules: post food!

>>10347123
ya like fish sticks? then you're a gay fish

>>10344897
Chicken salad sandwich. Gas station brand.
And a mug of cinnamon apple tea.

>>10344897
>sardines
>non-gmo cabbage
>non-gmo almond milk
>triscuits
>mustard
>tobasco

if they don't have tobasco then I jihadi suicide bomb the leaders

>>10344897
McDouble no pickles or onions and 2 McChickens with medium fries and diet coke. Obviously check the bag because those faggots always put pickles and onions on the double.

>>10344933
fuck you I get that reference

>>10346186
uuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaffpftppppfffftppfffffffff

>>10350689
No.

>>10344897
They tell you that all salt, fat, sugars, and anything unhealthy is now illegal.

1st item : Fried pig intestines
2nd item : every crispy fried chicken sandwich from multiple fast food chains.
3rd item: worms in dirt desert (chocolate pudding, crushed oreos and gummy worms)
4th item: pecan pie

Drink: Balls energy drink

A pint of ale and a phat burger with smoked goose breast slices
If alcohol is synthehol then coke

500 grams of chinese chicken and cashew
500 grams of chinese zha shaokao chicken
1kg of sui mai
1kg of cooked jasmine rice
and a can of diet coke

homemade chili and corn bread

Meatloaf with mashed potatoes.

>>10350676

I like being a guy. I like having a penis.

Red vines and Dr. Pib

>>10345259
you really think you can eat meat in the future? snowflakes will have made it illegal by then.

>>10353994
>Bawls energy drink
Is this your version of the 90s?

>>10344922
Moms

>>10345194
It would just give you 200 proof alcohol. You can buy that RIGHT NOW.