/ck/ - Food & Cooking

waiting for this first step so i can shit on it.

I would love to know how to make homemade hashbrowns!

>>12082797
I start by peeling and grating my russet potatoes. You can keep the skins or use a different spud it it suits you.

I tried Alton's recipe once and ruined a perfectly good dish towel.

>>12082797
Your towel looks like bacon.

>>12082805
thank you.
now i can shit on your first step.
>ahem...
you wash the fucking potatoes off first.

>>12082810
>washing skin you're going to cut off anyways
do you wash your bananas too?

>>12082806
how did that ruin a towel?

Rinse your potatoes to get rid of excess starch, or don't if you're weird like that. Either way, squeeze the water out of the shredded potato. You can squeeze it with your hands, but a washcloth works great. I like to use my aeropress.

>>12082810
How much does it matter if he's peeling them? Maybe he'll die of residual dirt germs. Or maybe he'll get one grain of sand in his teeth and realize how wrong he was!

>>12082811
if you don't wash potatoes you risk getting them contaminated while peeling with pesticides and other ground shit.

Step one. Open the package of hash brown patties.
Step two. bang your mom with all the free time

>>12082797
I'm more of a home fries dude, for simplicity's sake. But this'll be fun to watch.

>>12082814
Here are the bizzare aeropress potato pucks that serve no purpose.

>>12082813
It didn't "ruin" it, but irreparably stained it. I'd still lived with my parents at the time and was kind of new to cooking.

>>12082811
Wash it everyday.

>>12082824
This should be the highlight. Compressed little hash brown patties. Do it!

>>12082826
Oh, that makes more sense.

Heat your cooking fat of choice. Anything works here, animal fats, canola, whatever. I like butter but sometimes I use olive oil. When it's hot add the potatoes and season. Add enough salt and pepper to frighten. Paprika recommended. I add cumin and cayenne too, go ahead, try and stop me.

WHAT'S NEXT OP!

>>12082836
ok

>>12082836
>I add cumin
fucking dropped

Stir and incorporate the fat & spices. Pack the potatoes down as flat as you can, I use my fingers. The idea here is to create as much browning as possible. Cook on medium low. I hope you're not doing anything because this is going to take at least 30 minutes. Personally I appreciate having time to make coffee and clean the kitchen a bit.

>>12082851
>this is going to take at least 30 minutes
behold, the reason everyone uses frozen hash browns.

After a few min, flip it halfsies omelette style...

>>12082860
and DESTROY IT! ahhhaaahaahaa fuck that shit up

>>12082851
someone do the vomit emoji

>>12082866

I call this the Fantasy Blade Technique. The has browns must be destroyed and reforged, growing ever stronger. I do this for two reasons. First, where there is browning there is flavor. By mixing in the nice browned potatoes around, you ensure that delicious cooked flavor is everywhere in the hash brown. Second, volume continues to reduce so the flavor becomes stronger while the HBs get smaller.

wait where's the fucking eggs you retard?

Another few min have gone by, so again we fold...

>>12082882
...and destroy.

>>12082805
You do realize most of the potato's flavor is directly under the skin? What a waste

>>12082866
>>12082867

>>12082876
this bullshit is why it takes you so long to cook them.

To be completely clear about the folding/refolding, this does NOT distribute crispy bits throughout the hash browns. Once folded back into itself, the crispiness is lost. We will crisp later. Right now the hash browns are mush. Be patient- at this point, only 36 years have passed.

For the last time we fold...

>>12082890

>>12082895
and smush. In real life, I actually did this four times.

Stars we once knew have winked out, but now the final hash browns have been formed. Before I said to smush them down, now I make them kind of thick instead. Crispy on the outside, soft on the inside is the goal. Thick = soft inside.

>>12082908
looks like cat barf

>>12082910
That's what ur mum said when u were born, m8.

>>12082912

Once side has been browned-- beautiful!
...or is it? Don't get excited, it's not crispy yet. I can feel that it's a little mushy when I drag the spatula across. Sure, it looks good but it's not crispy, it needs more time, a lot more time.
If you ever serve your guests mushy has browns, your life is forfeit.

Can I add worcestershire + chuno + shoyu + tomato sauce to it? Maybe some mayo too?

>>12082908

The amount of time it takes to crisp the final hash browns is enough time to cook other breakfast fixins. I plate the hashbrowns last and crank the heat to high right before plating.

>>12082797
>>12082805
if you make these often enough, i'd definitely recommend a mandolin for the future. it makes the whole process so much faster.

>>12082914
looks like shitty falafel

Real niggas make their hash brown with corn and grated shallots

Plate sloppily.

Best hash browns begin with dehydrated potato shreds

>>12082933

>>12082933
You ruined the eggs you stupid nigger!

This is how I like em- soft, fatty and flavorful inside with an outside so crisp you can pick it up like a hockey puck. Thanks for reading.

>>12082940
seems more like a janky potato pancake than hashbrowns OP, probably tastes pretty good though

>>12082940
pls dont invite me over...ever

>>12082940
Thanks OP. Now I wonder how it tastes with tonkatsu/miso sauce. Or sweet spicy fish sauce.

>>12082940

>>12082797
I already learned how to make hash Browns from the Egg and Milk Minder™. You just have to get potatoes and cut 'em up and shit.

>>12082805
Not inherently wrong but I prefer to just dice them. Better contrast of crispy potato exterior to fluffy interior.

>>12082814
Correct. Washing the starch off is the difference between crispy and soggy hashbrowns regardless of form-factor.

>>12082836
Nah brah, gotta use a higher smoke point oil than that. Plus you gotta fry at a very high temperature to get that good crisp factor. Cooks faster too, less than 30 minutes. Cumin and cayenne are based tho. Looks great overall anon.

Can't say I've ever seen hash browns that look like this, need to try it

>>12082797
You need a flat top to properly cook ash browns.

These are not hashbrowns

>>12082933

>>12082940

OP here, glad to see everyone unanimously loves my hashbrowns. Let me know how you like yours too.

>>12083016
not sure what I was expecting

>>12083029
Will do it was good content and you seem knowledge don't let /ck/ discourage you everyone here has shitty fast food tastes anyway, good thread now enjoy your breakfast

>>12083029

I've never taken the time to shred them so. I've always made them home fry style:

dice and boil
let them cool overnight
stir fry them with all of the extra ingredients
if they aren't crispy enough for you, stick them in the oven for another 15 minutes

>>12083133
I do this, but instead of cooling overnight, I put them in the freezer while I heat the pan and chop everything else.

>>12083133
dice em
boil em
mash em
fry em
bake em
cook em
nuke em
taters all round

>>12082836
And this is where you fucked up. I’m out.

>>12082797

>>12082805
>peeling potatoes

>>12082814
>rinsing potatoes to get rid of the starch that holds the hash brown together in the first place

>posting a food and cooking thread on /ck/
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU FUCKING NEWFAG
ACTUAL FOOD AND COOKING BELONGS ON /B/, /CK/ IS FOR JACKPOSTING JIROPOSTING BANGPOSTING AND MCCHICKENS

You're sposed to form patties and fry the outside on high heat, not carmelize the potatoes into a starchy blob you idiot

>>12082940
Thanks for posting!

What is your annual income? Curious about your economic class and ethnicity.

Ketchup goes on potatoes. Not eggs, you fucking man-child.