/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Fucking board full of plebians. If you had an eye for detail you would see at the end that this mother brother is making a flower shaped pancake.

>>13087923
I just watched Cast Away and Tom Hanks should have done this

>>13087286
>>13087289
These haters never show the end result.

sorry for potato quality
best I could do with ffmpeg, original was already not hq

>>13087923
damn, now I want to go on a tropical adventure with coconutbro

>>13087923
You should see him deshell a sea turtle.

>implying you wouldn't eat it

>>13087960
stop posting this binch

Time to make some new webms

>>13088061

>>13088061
god damn, this makes me so anxious

>>13088061
man, that makes me really uncomfortable.

>>13088054
fuck this faggot

>>13088084

>>13088097

>>13087923
i want him as my daddy

>>13088061
That's Jack's kitchen so I assume that's his wife showing off the knife skills.
Got a link to the video?

>>13088046
thanks buzzfeed where do i upvote

i love me some england-style food

>>13088177
god she's so OLD

>>13088200

>>13088051
take that thot

>>13088177
>first we fuck

>>13088046
>castlevania olives
yes!

>>13088061
26 seconds of ass clenching

>>13088061

PLEASE

>>13087968
Amai

>>13088415
Kek

>>13088343
Is this the chef equivalent of stoner food?

>>13088343

>>13088177
Fuck she's so horrendous. Not like she was a looker before, but it just gets worse.

>>13088200
Had some friends over from England, cooked them up some steaks over some charcoal, their minds were blown I cooked them to med rare... it was literally just some shitty rib steaks from walmart I got for 6 dollars each.

>>13088083(you)

>>13088343
that doesn't look as good as he thinks it does

>>13088177
>>13088522
shes like a dollar store jessica alba

>>13088083
HDHGOWBTE???

>>13088343
What's the deal with these avocados that have a membrane on the inside? Are they just not ripe? A different variety? Every time I see one that membrane looks foul and they're hard as an unripe pear.

>>13088343
this reminds me of cutting into an abscess
sometimes they ooze out like this, sometimes they burst under pressure, but they're always that sickly shade of green

>>13088883
the 'membrane' is the skin of the seed
i don't know if theres a difference in how easily it gets cut by knife but it

>>13088061
>>13088084
>>13088100
>yes sir I have 5 years industry experience

>>13088704
It's crazy how Jessica Alba is still hot.

>>13088070
That's very satisfying

>>13088054
If someone else is paying. That fucker's $275.

>>13088177
Someone post the belly one please

>>13088070
gross

>>13089034
>>13089310
Duality of man

>>13088213
OH GOD

>>13088177
eww look at those fake ass veneer teeth implants

>>13088051
i would do this but then also hit her as hard as i can off camera

>>13088061
I'm physically hurting from watching this

>>13088083
the king has arrived

>>13087923
what a total bro, instantly sharing half of it

>>13088054
I sure hope he washes his forearm.

>>13089392
Salt sanitizes his arm on the way down.

>>13089310
IT's just a marshmellow with icecream/chocolate inside of it. What's the issue?

same old same old

>>13088054
Yikes what is that cheap watch he's wearing? Timex?

>>13090084
i remember working in a butchers and when i used to clean the big fridge with the hanging carcasses, one guy would come in and stick his finger up the lamb carcass's ass (it was obviously skinned and had organs removed) i always wondered how they got the butthole so clean

>>13087923
based as fuck

>>13090086
So women have masturbated with these fuckers for thousands of years right?

>>13090119
What kind of mental illness causes footfaggotry?

>>13090097
>>13090086
Jesus, they literally thirst for that cum and that bitch straight up bites the head off.
Someone needs to link me to the porn already

>>13090124
Everyone wants their partner to have non-fucked feet, but shit like "Foot Lung" really hammers home the fact that footfags are mentally ill. But they're arguably the least worrisome of all fetishfags.

>>13090116

what am i looking at here. what did they suspend that shit in, liquid metal? tar?

>>13087960
Honestly not very impressed

>>13090202
Project completion Meal, of Tar workers?

>>13088200
>>13088200
Impossibly horrific

>>13088207
Yea dad sure lemme have 2 more

>>13088301
This silliness angers me

>>13088343
Nah man keep it
Orange cheese and fish and terribly hard avocado
... damn that is some shit tier mess

>>13090059
What even happened? The video is too blurry

>>13090271

Prison Cook Impales Hand With Meat Grinder Steel Wire.

>>13090223
>Man who could not draw a straight skidmark in his tightie whities is not impressed by art
ok

>>13090017
>I'm not in it for the money but look at all this merch.

Also, wasn't 5 dollars a shitload of money 38 years ago?

>>13087923
>thanks bro

>>13088017
Don't talk shit about Jack Black you fag lord

>>13088207
damned, the oil looks hot, that's a huge improvement.

>>13088011
Easily one of the shittiest omelets I have ever seen.

>>13090116
>>13090202

that's a '' gigot bitume'' it's a tradition among worker in france to cook lamb legs in fucking tar at the end of a big construction site; usually, a road or a very big bulding.

its dangerous as hell and there is professionals cooks dedicated to this kind of event, and i'm pretty sure anyone who have eaten a '' gigot bitume'' will eventually die of heavy poisoning

>>13088046
So this is puttanesca for people who prefer blandness?

>>13088061
It's like a horror movie

>>13088054
stop the fuckint kinfe tapping aSGH

>>13090657

Not sure what was I expecting, but laughing so hard at the end everytime

>>13088566
They were being polite.

>>13088017
Jack Black is based you fucking nigger kill yourself

>>13090695
>>13090692
>>13090689
>>13090682
>>13090680
looks yum yum in the unprofessional homecooked comfy way.
except the meatloaf, the meatloaf just looks delicious

>>13090446
>>13090704
Fuck off.

>>13088083
how does he get out?

>>13090718
He has to break all the cell.

>>13090017
>green symbolizes the freshness of the chillies
what a fucking lie. the color of the cap indicates the flavor/spice level

>>13090446
>>13090704
pair of faggots

>>13090017
>if you haven't succeeded yet it just means you haven't tried hard enough
Imagine swallowing American propaganda this hard.

>>13090760
Let me guess anon, you work a minimum wage job 30 hours a week and then come home and shitpost and fap all night in your parent's basement

No wonder you haven't succeeded. Ever try learning a skill? Since you're on the internet I recommend game development, if you can come up with a relatively simple to program but novel idea for a multiplayer game and market it well, then all you gotta do is fill it up with microtransaction cosmetics and the zoomers will pay your bills for life. Your first few games will probably be total shit but if you do enough drugs you might randomly have a good idea one day

>>13090774
Is this copypasta, or are you a legitimate dope?

>>13087923
Consider the coconut.

>>13088054
He keeps his knives sharp, I'll give him that.

>>13090774
You sound like a working class chump. I bet you thought it would be a great "investment", how you would wake up to a warm, healthy breakfast to start off your long day. Maybe, you even had a couple thoughts about all the other nifty little uses you could find for the thing, how it would help you cook healthier meals in general, shed a couple pounds off the old gut, boost your confidence around work and with the ladies. Yeah, maybe that slow cooker would start your life cooking again, wouldn't it? I can see your strained hands holding the box and reading through it carefully at the store. A little bit pricey, but you're the type of guy who thinks everything is more than you can spend, aren't you. And look what happened to you. Look what the slow cooker did to you. Fucked you over, and made you clean it like a useless bitch. You don't even fucking like oatmeal. Piece of shit, you've been repeating those three words your whole life, haven't you. Yeah, how was work after that piece of shit fucked you over? I bet it was on your mind the whole day, you probably didn't say shit to nobody. Can't be telling people about your mistakes. How your little fix yourself plan, failed you. Don't want people to start thinking you're the failure. You're the piece of shit, all along. You don't want that do you? You don't want to be the piece of shit everybody secretly whispers about, do you? Was your father a piece of shit like you? I bet he never had a slow cooker. He had a woman, a house, a damn good job. I bet it's slow cooking you the fuck alive, isn't it. Comparing yourself to him. How one day when all the steam runs our of your life, you'll discover how you're nothing more than burnt shit to be scrapped off and thrown in the trash.

>>13090776
The fact that think I am a retard proves to me that on some level you know you aren't trying hard enough and are in denial about it. I don't give a shit if you stay in your parents basement or not, more money for me. But on the off chance that they invent and immortal robot for me to transplant my brain into within my lifespan, I don't want to be stuck in this reality forever with a bunch of faggots like you.

The best time to start learning a new skill is in elementary school, the second best time is now. Will you do something with your life, or just waste away in front of your computer?

>>13088054
Wtf he took the bone off. The whole point of getting a tomahawk steak is so I can take pictures of that stupid fucking cut for my instagram.

>>13088011
How the fuck did the pan come out so clean? No matter which way I make eggs, even in a non-stick pan, the pan is left with some egg whites stuck to the sides with a shitton of grease all over it.

>>13090786
is this pasta?

>>13090784
It's a sharp knife, but I suspect someone else keeps it sharp for him.

>>13090105
ah mexico. The only place worse in all ways than america. Fat bastards lmao

>>13088054
What's his end game?

>>13090017
They also displace a chunk of the population down wind during the production season.

>>13091052

>>13090676
>brits
>polite
Brits and Aussies are two of the most awful and foul mouthed groups of people in the entire world.

>>13090657
What happened here? Why did they stop and what was that at the end?

>>13088051
ha!

>>13091049
You must have the shittiest quality nonstick pan in the history of shit quality nonstick pans.

>>13090657
Since when does Kay care about danger close?

[alternate reply]
That knife is almost as dull as she is.

>>13090668
I can't imagine how he ever got pink eye.

>>13091091
Norf
Norf
Norf

>>13090116
>>13090473
what the hell france

>>13089349

>>13091145
>>13091150
>>13091155
>>13091159
>>13091163
how

>>13091178

>>13091187
>that filename
Kek good one anon.

But how does he get out of there without breaking the eggs?

>>13091190
>that fucking eggfort meme
ok, this to me qualifies as an ascended momment of 4chins meme history

>>13091133
ha. cats are dickheads

>>13088061
woah jack your hands look... smooth

>>13090017
>he says, after having already made more money than he can spend in his remaining life
Suuuure, money isn't important Mr. multi billionaire.

>>13088515
based charcoal chicken man

>>13087960
TEH REI one is better, but both are insanely impressive. Fuck.

>>13088051
Too Chad for me.

>>13090369
>That poor bench

>>13091538
>worst girl
Disgusting.

Hey Chefs

In 1 Tour and 40 Minutes tue 4chin autumn Cup groups will be drawn, in which /ck/ will compete to make it back to the Elites in Winter.

Stream and more info can be found here.

>implyingrigged.info

>>13087960
>>13091538
How do they do it?

>>13091190
I hope /ck/ is in the next 4chan cup. We may be slow, we may not have many memes, but the ones we do have are all great.

>>13090784
>>13091054
He uses these: https://www.amazon.com/Friedr-Dick-Breaking-Knife-8/dp/B000UBBVZC

They're cheap as shit and easy to regrind in a few seconds.

>>13091619
poor bird :(

>>13091619
That wasn't Mari tho...

>>13091732

>>13091741
Accurate.

>>13091761
thats a man

>>13091770
With an ass like that? Don't care.

>>13091780
>>>/lgbt/

>>13091632
The autumn Cup Starts next week, and /ck/ will be playing.
Today we find out who we will be playing

>>13088051
wouldve given her my bowl and just walk away

>>13090097
I thought that was a bull penis in a hotdog bun

>>13091619
>this bird = me a buffet
so much food but it all sucks, wat do

>>13091980
>so much food but it all sucks
that buffet feel when

>>13091753
how'd they even accomplish that? 10/10 engineering skills

>>13088207
Kay is Scottish, not English.

>>13087286

what the fuck was the name of that scottish mum who made shit food?

>>13092044
>>13092034
fuck me shoulda just read the thread

>>13092044
death her self

>>13090649
What's the proper way to use that?

>>13091790
where would i watch this?

>>13087286
that is the worst thing I've ever seen

>>13087923
Very cool guy

>>13089560
Marshmallow. It's not mellow. It's mallow.

>>13092034
Cincinatti Chili step one...

>>13091790
Which game is this :3?

>>13088343
MEHMET, MY SON

>>13092104
Implyingrigged.info

Click the cytube box

>>13092034
She's English you dopey mong

>>13092142
This is the fourchanc Up
Played on Pro evo soccer.
>wtf even is this shit?
All you need to know:
https://implyingrigged.info/wiki/FAQ
>All you need to know about our team https://implyingrigged.info/wiki//ck/

>>13092146
thank you

Ok Chefs

We will be playing
Vs /mu/ on saturday
Vs /his/ the friday after
Vs /out/ next sunday

>>13088177
she looks like caroline konstar

>>13088200
Butter-basted beef jerky

>>13091619
I'll have some egg salad, hold the bird poop.

>>13091049 If you get the opportunity, use goose fat to cook eggs. Silky smooth, light taste, nothing ever sticks. Pure heaven+

>>13088054
Why the fuck are you touching my already prepared food with your digusting fucking hands you ape?

>>13092090
Insert the serated edge first, then pull.

>>13091780
gays fuck off from /ck/

>>13092129
this.

I've made Cincinatti chili twice, and each time, I get a little perturbed from having to throw meat into plain water and then massaging it until it's a really loose, pink slurry. Tbh, two was enough. Next time I make chili, I'm gonna work out a way to get a better flavor while keeping a similar consistency.

All I know is I hate the cinnamon in it.

>>13087923
I want some of his coconut water

>>13088054
what does tapping the knife do? also what kind of knife is that?

>>13092431
>what does tapping the knife do?
looks hella dope

>>13092442
bro

>>13092442
kek
>>13092431
probably helps getting rid of traces of meat or meat stickied to the knife, or maybe just one of those ritual shit he's used to doing

>>13087923
https://hooktube.com/watch?v=qihY8mp7aa0

>>13092468
Use invidio, hooktube doesn't work properly anymore. It's just a lighter version of youtube now.

>>13089426
but who sanitizes the salt?

>>13092475
Keep getting "The media could not be loaded, either because the server or network failed or because the format is not supported." from invidio.

>>13088054
No gloves. Enjoy your shit particaled food.

>>13092476
the good Lord

>>13087923
God I wish that coconut was my asshole

Doesn't look like there is a bottom. I guess they just spooned it out from the bottom once done.

>>13092547
you'll N E V E R be a grill

>>13092547
Post cock

>>13092560

>>13092409
>Being attracted to a girl that hot is gay
Sure thing, incel.

>>13087923
God what a CHAD

>>13090017
>if you haven't succeeded yet it just means you haven't tried hard enough
fuck you old man

>>13088110
I've never been around one of those saws, is it designed to prevent him getting cut if he puts his hand against it from the back rather than the front or is he being stupid grabbing it as close to the blade as possible?

>>13088177
What's wrong with her face? It's like the muscles don't know how to move in a human way.

>>13088213
>English food
I see they are cooking it the traditional way. By means of a tatted up lard ass.

>>13088343
Looks absolutely disgusting.

>>13088515

>>13088566
shut the fuck up retard, have sex also dialte

>>13088054
he cooks like a down syndrome kid.

>>13090760
Babies first nialism? There is no reason you cannot exceed in life other then your own retardation.

>>13090695
never seen a moron cooked before.

>>13090718
He has to serve all the eggs

>>13092665
Band saws are only sharpened along the feed side edge. That's not to say the back side is safe to touch, but a lot of butchers and experienced carpenters get really comfortable with getting that close to a running saw, and he's a butcher as his main skillset.

>>13088011
Nigga WHADAFUK

>>13092570
very recognizable bulge

>>13087945
watch gladiator next i've heard it's good

>>13087286
Unironically what would happen if you tried to shallow fry pancake batter? Would you end up with something with the consistency of a donut?

>>13092792
>>13092800

>>13091378
Well, what the fuck do you want him to do? You expect him to make JUST enough money for the rest of his life and then totally end his company? You're an idiot.

>>13090473
>>13091142
yeah, this sounds like something they'd do in some commie bloc shithole, not France

>>13088051
>eating the noodles that are mixed with her spits
Fucking gross

>>13090649
How can one human be so fucking inept at simple tasks? It is staggering how poor his motor control is.

>>13090649
/ck/ hasn't been the same since Jack died...

>>13088051
I liked the part when she smiled I want to make a girl smile one day.

>>13090760
>>13092661
losers who cant accept that they are the reason they are losers. its not society's fault you wasted your life away. we are all responsible for our own lives.

>>13088011
I hate that fat slob and his fans so fucking much.
Every fucking video he's just frying some cheap shit in a pan, tossing everything around because that apparently makes you look more authentic and the comments section is full of slavering retard boomers proclaiming that "this is REAL cooking!"
Goddamn, I'm mad.

>>13093465
I can see it's quality and authentic boomer cuisine

>>13093457
>21 yo giving his take on society
shut the fuck up retard no one cares

>>13093496
waaaah the boomers ruined my life its not my fault i didnt apply myself in school or my career waaaah

>>13088343
KingCobraJFS wouldn't even eat that shit.

>>13093682
the king likes his 'cado deep fried.

>>13093531
No matter how hard you try, you might fail any way. You are not guaranteed success just because you give it everything you've got. This is a basic fact of reality. It doesn't mean you shouldn't try.

>>13093531
>he fell for the "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" meme

Fucking yikes and boomerpilled

>>13093707
With the skin on.

>>13088054
Why does he put salt on his elbow?

>>13093820
It just spreads out the salt as it hits his elbow. I tried it and it actually works surprisingly well, but it is at the expense of looking like a massive faglord

>>13093842
>I tried it
god imagine being this fucking autistic, what are you, 12?

>>13090652
Do you guys remember all the fucking jenkem memes?

>>13093858
Well it's been posted a million times so why not try. It just requires salt. You never do anything out of curiosity? What a fucking gay manbaby you are

>>13093909
>You never do anything out of curiosity?
That's how I ended up with a $3000 fursuit and the clap.

>>13088213
This was painful to watch.

>>13092674
Shes an actress, she so used to emoting in such an exaggerated way she cant move her face normally

>>13088883
There are varieties of avocados, this one tastes different and has a bigger seed.

>>13090652
how is it possible for a man to fuck things up?

>>13091761
whats the obsession with asians and sex change?

>>13093465
jfc why not just put a bullet in his head, it would kill him faster than feeding him all that butter and cheese

>>13094117
what a chad way to serve cake

>>13094199
What's with the automatic assumption that she's has to be trans? Is it because that's deep down what you think she has to be to be that hot?

>>13094229
i can see the adam's apple

>>13094225

>>13094283
those breads actually look tasty, the craft cheese ruins it though

>>13094237
What the fuck did I just watch..

Mexicans:
>TACO BELL ISN'T REAL MEXICAN FOOD!

Also mexicans:
>>13094354
>>13094360
>>13094366

>>13094369
>i only like authentic mexican food
>here's you greasy corn wrapper with some unseasoned mystery meat

>>13094360
>Mexican cuisine
"Walking Tacos" are pure flyover.

>>13094352
Why does this moron cut the wax rind into the food?

>>13094448
>Wax rind
There's no wax rind on Raclette.

First time visitor of this board from /fit/.

Been fasting (not eating) for the past 20 hours to detox and basically reverse a night of drinking whiskey and lots of chicken tenders and I click on this thread.

Not the best idea. Supposed to be fasting until tomorrow night.

hello, this is my first time in /ck/.
have to day, i thought my home board had some fucked up WEBM threads, but boy o'boy, yours takes the cake.
it was an horrifying experience, i made face throught top to bottom. jesus fucking christ

>>13088100
>>13088084
Why are women such vile creatures ?

>>13094352
Americans can't even eat a bloody salad without a gallon of cheese on it. Jesus.

>>13094757
that's raclette retard, it's not american

>>13094750
God that's so upsetting, the drop AND the cold oil.

>>13094237

its funny cuz aLL gAyMERs LiKE doRItoS!!11!! xd

kys

>>13092034
She's English

>>13094757
OBSESSED

>>13093329
France is a commie block shithole with slightly prettier architecture

>>13090709
you must be as retarded and fat as jack and kay

>>13091619
this bird looked at almost everything, and deemed it to be shit. damn!

>>13094369
glistening with grease.

>>13093374
Cringe.

Someone post the webm of the """authentic""" Mexican food being made where that qt girl shows up for a second behind the old man making the food.

>>13091761
Yuck ladyboys

>>13095877
nice job, you little fuckin retard

>>13087923
You may not like it but this is what men peak performance looks like.

>>13094676
Thank you come again