/ck/ - Food & Cooking

For me, it is this one.

Yoshi blade, not even close. It's not even funny.

>>13824155
Why would someone need to cut wood with a kitchen knife? Does this fool eat woodchips for brekkie?

The one where he puts cayenne pepper in his eyes to cure his pink eye.

>>13824025
literally just pick any jack video and you'll find something infuriating

>>13824179
link

The one where he blames the magic bullet for his omelette being undercooked.

https://youtu.be/7InCfiYZW4I

>>13824192
Yes but there must be one jack to rule them all, one jack to undercook them, one jack to enfuriate us, and in the darkness choked out.

>>13824363
This entire episode is extremely infuriating.

>>13824362
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Era4tENWn4Q

On the topic, my favorite Jack webm is the one where he separates a yolk unsuccessfully. Can anyone post it? It's stunning how he finds a way to be so inept; he ruins things in ways you never thought it thinkable to do. In that simple act of separating a yolk he does like 10 wrong things.

>>13824505
this is unreal

Can we have a good old fashioned raid, like back in the day? He live streams on Saturday morning and would be great to sneak some /ck/ memes into his boring ass Boomer show.

We used to have Joey on our side where he even shouted us out

>>13824523
Surely, he would have run out of food by now in this age of quarentine?

Is this guy like ironic or what? It looks like he’s being doing this show for over 10 years now and he is still as terrible. Most of hos videos have high number of dislikes and many negative comments. What does he say about it? Is he for real?

All of them. I can't even get through most of the clips posted here, I can't imagine how fucking trainwreck his full videos are.

>>13824564
He calls them jealous haters from third world countries.

If you have been in the epic live thread when he was on that hillbilly shark tank show you would've seen his ineptitude is legit. À la ChrisChan TV spot when he was a kid

>>13824576
Any clips?

>>13824523
Not your personal food army, faggot.

>>13824592
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_CnVFFMpYc

>>13824708
I don't think that applies here, dumbo. It's not like he wants to DDOS his ex-girlfriend or something.

>>13824708
I'm damn sure you wanna laugh, too.

Not like anyone actually comes here for cooking tips.

>>13824714
I fucking hate British "people"

>>13824505
For what purpose?

>>13825227
I think he wants to keep the middle cold so it stays rare. Which is retarded and dangerous.

>>13824708
Sorry you hate fun

>>13824025
The one where he tried to grill eggs

>>13824407
>he ruins things in ways you never thought it thinkable to do
this. it is like a talent he has. he should be studied.

>>13825227
https://lifehacker.com/this-ice-cube-trick-will-make-your-burgers-super-juicy-1794751529

Has anyone got that one webm where he cracks an egg onto a grill and it just slowly slides off and falls into his bbq

>>13825398
>dangerous

>>13826104
i can literally go on lifehack right now and publish an article on why it's good for you to drink bleach.

>>13824025
This seems more like shitty appliance design. Why would it unscrew the same way that it rotates?

>>13826142
Now the true test is to see if Jack will do a video on it.

For me, it is him trying to shred half cooked pork.
I can't even watch Jack ironically even more.
He has become more bitter and lazy, and his dead stroke arm is fucking disgusting.

>>13826265
yea thats the one for me as well

burger_blunt_knife.webm

>>13826143
It wasn't locked into place

>>13824155
That one is especially infuriating because he proudly declares that he plans on taking the knife back for a refund after deliberately destroying it.

>>13826143
In a battle of wits between Jack and the designers at KitchenAid, you think *KitchenAid* are the ones who don't know what they're doing?

how do I stop myself to click on these threads?
i justHAVE TO look at ll webms of jack, even if it hurts.
why do i do this to myself?

i'll never figure out why you guys subject yourselves to this. it's like smashing your balls with a potato masher, and you say "oh man this is so fucking stupid haha im crushing my balls with a potato masher ouch!!" but you keep doing it.

>>13826346
>>13826325


there are no answers more than selfhate

>>13824363

>>13824051
bruh, the chicken is still flying arround wtf

>>13824051
thats a big thigh

>>13826265
an animal died for this

>>13824363
Why does it look like he's using a green screen when he's standing in his kitchen?

>>13826426
He's not dead yet.

>>13826453
That's because Jack isn't any better at lighting than he is at cooking.
He probably has the lights really close to the camera and that gives it that weird CGI look.
This is also why you sometimes get that look when using flash on your phone camera, especially with subjects close to you.

>>13826848
imagine him handling lights

>>13826815

>>13824025
The canning one where he instructs how to get botulism

the one where he advocates napalming palestinians is pretty hilarious

>>13824025
He did a homemade hand sanitizer video earlier this month. Of course he fucked it up and thought it was all good. Something tells me he doesn't wash his hand regularly.

can some kind anon please post the dining with jack menu

>>13827398
You mean this?

>>13827237
Beautiful

>>13825227
he's making steamed hams

>>13827327
Did he use Tito's vodka?

>>13824708
Newfag alert

It has to be Aunt Myrnas party cheese salad. I laugh at most jack vids but he went to far that time

>>13824523
It kinda stopped being funny after the second stroke.
I think a lot of use don't even watch his videos anymore because they're just pathetic instead of hilariously pathetic now.

>>13824032
That's not Jack, dumdum.
https://youtu.be/lI2lWuoMV3I

>>13827398

>>13826453
Court ordered to remain 500 ft away from any kitchen at all times

Nothing makes me rage more than seeing Jack cook shit in a cold pan/oil.

>>13828168

>>13826810
I'd eat the entire tray, I don't give a fuck

>>13824051
>>13824505
How the fuck does he manage to make everything so bloody? Everything he slices open starts bleeding out like a live animal, I've never seen anyone manage to somehow fuck up so badly, not even a literal child learning to cook

>>13826286
kek

>>13827237
kek

>>13827926
Rubbing alcohol and aloe gel. Final product only had around 20-25% alcohol content, far below the usual minimum.

>>13826408
>>13826408
>>13826408
>>13826408

>>13828018
amazing thank you

>>13828018
Good on ya

>>13828208
>bloody

>>13824051
This one is just horrible.

>>13827888
imagine if someone made this for you

>>13824025

>>13828018
cream cheese and marshmallow fluff fruit dip is actually pretty good, only edible thing on the menu

>>13828639
i'd reward them with candy and a coloring book

>>13828639
I'd be happy anyone cared about me enough to cook for me at all.

Jack's lost his charm when I found out he's a fraud who only "cooks" for the camera. Even if be was a terrible cook at least you could appreciate his passion. But no he's a lying hack who eats fast food when not making videos.

>>13828018
Couldn't stop laughing, I needed that. Thanks anon

>>13826408
For you

>>13824032
>tfw you forget to rinse the garlic

>>13828952
>But no he's a lying hack who eats fast food when not making videos.
This wasn’t obvious from his cooking?

>>13824363
>that intro title doesnt even has even spacing

i wonder how this retard can procreate

>>13824169
Its Ja/ck/ so... Probably

For me it's when he cooked chili for his church chili contest using brisket that had been sitting in his freezer for a year. And he was butthurt when he didn't win

>>13824564
>dislikes and negative comments
Someone hasn't watched a Jack video in a while

Anyone have the webm of the omelette maker blowing open? That one's pure gold

>>13824051
Look how juicy that is!

>>13824367
The LotR movies made references like this so much less cool than they were when "Frodo Lives" was a thing.

>>13824523
He loses his shit whenever someone calls him boomer on the live streams

>>13824523
Not your personal army.

>>13828208
he's fat so he literally cant wait the full 20min for his meals to cook.
he throws them in for 5min and his fatbrain instinct is to instantly take the food out the second it smells nice so he can start eating.

>>13826815
>>13826265
>>13824505
>>13824051
this is the future you rare fags wanted.

>>13824363
>magic bullet
>that entire commercial
American television is truly unbelievable.

>>13830185
None of those show Donald Trump being submitted to eternal agony on all of his nerve endings while being granted eternal life. What are you talking about?

>>13828952
It makes sense he'd be a fat glutton if he cooks like this, I'd run to a fast food joint too if I was this inept.

does anyone else feel kinda bad that he can't be a masterchef anymore with only one usable arm? does anyone have the clip of him trying to open a jar...

>>13824407
Reminder to wash your hands after wiping your ass and before wiping your eyes, boys.

>>13826278
Where do you buy these face masks? My local stores are out of stock.

>>13827888
Why would anyone need a recipe for this shit?

>>13828645
you missed:
no money
no skills
clearly unsafe
gives no useful information
i have this useless crap

>>13828645
>>13830267
and no decent kitchen utensils

>>13824032
people like she and jack tell you so much about the human race once you get past the initial horror...

a being who should be fully aware of their own ineptness, instead takes the position of guiding others, implying they think they know what they're doing.

marie is probably already dead from lead poisoning that she got somehow and ja/ck/ will not survive goronavirus, at least