/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>15885741
Do you know how to go buy food?

>>15885741
stop drinking soda and energy drinks it makes you a neurotic useless retard too afraid to try anything new

>>15885746
No. My parents have always done that.
>>15885749
I don't like soda. The bubbles feel weird down my throat.

>>15885741
Why are you scared of grocery shopping

>>15885753
24 years old you better learn how to do things for yourself..

>>15885769
People silently judging what I out in the basket and speaking the checkout person.

>Too scared to go grocery shopping
lettuce is terrifying, i feel you

>>15885793
You've just got to remember that everyone else in that shop has no interest in you whatsoever. They are just as self obsessed as you are, just less anxious with it. Not a single person is out their to judge you for your shopping, they're all too busy thinking about their own lives.
Honestly, no one cares, you will be fine

>>15885741
You can learn all those things in like half a day. Try pushing yourself through the anxiety. Those things are easier than you think.

>>15885799
>>15885800
Dubs of truth

>>15885741
How’d you get the bread if you are too scared to go shopping

>>15885741
>Don't know how to use my gas stove
This is concerning.
>Don't know how to cook eggs
https://youtu.be/LML1S7InIU8
This is a good place to start.
Jacques likes his eggs barely cooked; you may prefer around a 5 minute egg.
Do not use a plastic dish; make sure you use a glass or ceramic dish. Butter it well; just smear your finger in some butter and then wipe it around the inside of the dish (sides and bottom).
Sitting the dish in boiling (simmering) water means you can't burn the eggs, and the timing is repeatable - the water controls the temperature.

You can beat the egg first, if you're afraid of distinct whites and yolks.

>>15885812
this french accent is too much

>>15885799
>>15885800
Thanks guys. :)
>>15885810
Petrol station sells bread and little things.
>>15885812
I'll check this out. :)

>>15885821
Eggs are quite inexpensive.
If you screw one up, you're only out like 20 cents (probably less). They're a good thing to try with, and you can always fall back on bread and water.

>>15885793
I have good news for you, anon. They have self-checkout stations now.

>>15885741
I was in the same boat as you a few years ago, anon. Minus the whole grocery shopping thing. Parents kicked me out the day after my 18th (Thankfully I had a part time job). I learnt to cook and make things just by watching YT videos, buying food and experimenting with different stuff. You'll get there.

Honey I went from basically being tardwrangled by my parents to a homeless brokedick cokehead, to further recovery living in a trailer park with an alcoholic i met on /b/, and I could still scramble myself some goddamn eggs.
Anxiety and fear of failure is a bitch but youre never going to get better if you dont try.

>>15885793
They literally do not give a flying fuck. and even if they do, why should you care?

Eggs and steak are fucking cruel so that's good

>>15885865
If you make 1 bad dish don't give up. Cooking is an easy skill to pick up, but it is a skill non the less. Takes practice, just like anything else that is actually enjoyable and satisfying in life, it's not easy the first time but time+effort=improvement
You might end up loving it if you give it a proper go.
No one on here made a great meal the first time they tried, and now we are all lurking on a food forum just wanting to talk about our hobby/passion/career with other anons.
Good luck out there m8, life is only as hard as you make it for yourself

I can't express how little most cashiers want to talk to you.

>>15885741
You can just microwave eggs or do what my grandpa does.
>Coffee
>Throws whole sleeve of crackers in
>Wa la, lunch is served

>>15885741
if you know how to use the internet, you should have an answer to all of your questions, retard.

>>15885865
>Parents kicked me out the day after my 18th
Why are americans so fucking mentally ill?

>>15885936
>Americans
I'm Aussie

>>15885741
go work in a kitchen as a dish pig, after 2 - 5 years you will know how to cook well.

>>15885741
Just order your groceries online. It costs a bit more but that is the autism tax

>>15885741
Your parents failed you in every possible way, anon.

Retarded parents forget they're not just taking care of their precious eternally young angel, they're supposed to be raising a future adult who can function on their own. Neglecting to actually prepare someone to do adult activities then throwing them out into the world is honestly abuse.

>>15885793
They don't matter.

>>15885941
Oof, well then learning to cook and efficiency with ingredients is even more important, you guys have Canada pricing on most of your food stuffs.

>>15885793
You judge people all the time when passing them by on the street but 2 minutes later you forgot about them. People will judge what you put on your basket, then they will get in their car and they already forgot you exist.

>>15885741
Learn to tie knots in ropes faggot

>>15885741
Not being sarcastic, I can understand how using a stove or cooking eggs can be intimidating for someone who hasn't done it before.

How about making some meals that don't involve any scary or involved techniques but are also healthy-ish. Make a sandwich, buy some sliced ham, american cheese, squeeze bottle of mustard, I'm sure you can manage that. And try getting some vegetables into your diet. I'm sure you can wash some lettuce. You can buy packs of salad greens that you just need to add some dressing to and toss. Drink lots of water, it's good for you. And if you feel you need something warm, then maybe you can try working up towards the stove. Use a toaster first, maybe a cheap sandwich press for grilled cheeses. Make some instant ramen (I'm sure using an electric kettle is less scary than a stove) and add whatever toppings you like.

>>15885793
how do you live alone

>>15885936
>>15886985
how embarrassing

>>15885799
I judge every person near me. Carts full of sodas, Debbie cakes and sugar cereals. Parents toting around obese children paying with EBT. I judge them all. I’m neurotic though.

>>15887105
>I can understand how using a stove or cooking eggs can be intimidating for someone

It is a gross failure of parenting, but over the past 30 years "don't use the stove! hot! hurt baby!" and "you're 12 now, so you can microwave your own hot pockets!" have been what I hear.
Fucking sad.

My 3 year old needs me to turn on the stove for her, but she can fry an egg better than a number of my ex-girlfriends could manage, and her sausage patties are perfect. Still working on the pancake thing; she insists on using a badly shaped pan because it's cute, so they're hard to flip. I'm letting her big sister (9) teach her pancakes; she has the patience, I just want to grab a sturdy ladle to apply corrective instruction.

Anyway, my kids can fry an egg; I hope OP can figure it out. You need a little butter (or oil), even in a nonstick pan.
Don't be afraid of going nonstick easymode; feeding yourself ("results") is more important than mastering technique and artistic frippery at the moment.

Good luck in the kitchen.

>>15887173
No one cares about your opinion.

Just wear tinfoil underwear in public. The grocery scanners radio waves won't affect your junk so your hormone level won't go winky. Thank me.later.

>>15887218
This, gotta protect your sexual organs from the government radiation OP.

>>15887173
i judge the shit out of everyone too but it doesn't matter
who cares if people judge you?
people have opinions, so what

>>15885793
Don't listen to these people saying nobody will judge you. That's obviously a lie designed to get you to go to the store. I judge what other people put in their carts all the time, and sometimes I see one so funny it stays in my memory permanently. You do need to monitor your behavior at the store same as anywhere else, I think you're intelligent enough to know this, and trying to trick you won't work. The truth is that it will take time to learn how to make purchases that won't cause other people to laugh at you and remember you. The truth is also that it's worth it to go through that trial and error. If you have a car, you can cheat by going to out-of-town grocery stores to practice.

>>15885961
not possible unless you're nonwhite

>>15887310
Imagine going to a store and checking what everyone else has in their cart lmao
How can a single anon be so self-conscious and pathetic
What a loser

>>15887310
Ok chud

>>15885741
Desperation's a great motivator. Find your rock bottom and push off of it.

>>15887413
Try being autistic and hate people, you will find lots of things to hate about them

>>15885793
No body gives a shit about you, you arrogant prick. You are not the center of the universe. Aren't children supposed to grow out of this phase at 11?

>>15885741
>Is there any hope for me?
With that incredibly shitty attitude of yours not really.

>>15887578
Ok chud

>>15885741
How the fuck does someone with such severe autism manage to live alone?

>>15885741
Hi buddy. My advice would be to make small goals (look up SMART goals). Can you shop WITH someone?

>>15887651
At least you know to admit defeat, anon.

>>15887668
Sure thing chud

>>15885821
Go get eggs, chicken, olive oil, some white fish like tilapia, salt, pepper, cheese, lemon pepper and Cajun seasoning. It isn’t much but at least you can feed yourself.

>>15887667
>SMART goals
lol the company i work for makes us use those

>>15885891
That's a good meal before a flight

>>15887182
You have given your three your old more parenting than the OP at 24 years old ever received

>>15885741
>OP

>>15885741
you have this crazy amazing seemingly endless tool at your disposal called the INTERNET just teach yourself or are you seriously that disabled you cannot learn by yourself?

>buy salmon filet (skin on)
>put tin foil on baking sheet (enough to wrap over the salmon, but not too tight
>put fish on foil
>season with a little salt, pepper, and garlic
>throw on a lemon slice
>cover with foil
>bake for 15 minutes @ 450F
ez

>>15885799
https://youtu.be/AkoML0_FiV4

Bet you have never made a phone call

>>15889527
Whenever I get called I immediately panic in a fight or flight manner, then I ignore it and ignore the voicemails too

>>15885799
ehhh most people are definitely like that but theres always someone out there that looks around and judges

>>15885741
this is the modern man
let that sink in

>>15889534
you are a sad sad existence

>>15885793
You know you can order groceries online and have them left on your doorstep without even having to interact with the delivery person, right?

>>15889587
I know, it's not a choice

>>15889616
yeah it is

>>15889534
>>15889587
>>15889616
That's the existence of a startlingly large amount of people now

OP here. Sorry for the late replies. Surprised the thread is still up. Thanks for the all nice replies and what not. I'm gonna go to the local store today (currently 10am) and buy some little things like eggs, bacon, some packed salad and start from there.
>How have you been living alone all this time
I don't know. It's only been a year and a half.
>Surely you can use a kettle and a microwave
Yes I can. I know how to make coffee but I have using a microwave. Dunno why.
>Watch YT videos and learn from the internet
I do watch cooking videos a lot.
I'm not entirely retarded. I have this stupid social anxiety I've had for god knows how long. I do try, i just have low confidence in myself.

>>15889663
get yourself a good cast iron pan and just cook shit in it
chicken, beef, veggies, gravies, pancakes, toast, whatever
you'll burn or undercook things at first, more often than not simultaneously, but you'll eventually develop a feel for it
and a decent cast iron pan will be something you can pass down to your kids eventually
plus it's nontoxic unlike a lot of cookware out there

>Policies designed and enacted with 'boosting children's confidence' in mind instead cause them to be unconfident and social anxiety-ridden
How was this fucked up so badly

>>15889746
How much are they? I only have $40 on me.

>>15889761
Boomers

>>15889761
w*men

>>15889780
to be honest all the cookware I have with the exception of a dutch oven I bought in college was actually passed down to me, most of it is 2-3 generations old, but cast iron is hard to screw up
I'm sure you can find a decent pan for that money
just do your homework on whatever brand you go with

>>15889761
>Let's prop up children so when they fail they fall from a greater height so it hurts more
That's how

>>15889823
Thanks. I'll have a look around

>>15889830
You pretty much nailed it

>>15889663
hey anon, as somebody who is in their 30s and still deals with stupid anxiety shit but who now completely functions, cooks, pays bills, and has an awesome job after being directionless for most of my life
i want you to know
you're doing a good job and taking the effort to ask, improve yourself, and push through your anxiety is really great, and you will only get better the more you do it even though it will initially suck

>>15889761
>>15889830
I've actually been to a seminar about raising kids (don't ask) and the theme they touched on again and again was, make sure your kids keep trying when they fail. It seems to me that it's not enough just to tell them to do this. The way they are rewarded, or not rewarded, when they are bailed out or not, all of that matters just as much if not more. It seems that despite knowing well what leads kids to succeed, we still mangled the execution in recent years.

>>15889900
Why would I choose to fail and risk hurting myself when I could instantly abandon anything and everything I'm not immediately talented enough to be good at?

>>15889894
Appreciate it. Hope things get better for you too. :)

>>15885793
If you don't want to be judged, here's what you buy. This is a normal american type of grocery shopping. I'm assujming you have nothing, if you already have any of these items feel free to drop them. Almost any combination of the stuff here wouldn't be that weird to buy or turn any heads. This will cost you a few hundred bucks, but will give you the basic ingredients, the skills, the courage, and the weaponry to continue to succeed on a go-forward basis. .
>kosher salt, it comes in a big blue box
>mccormick pepper grinder in the large size
>boneless skinless chicken breasts or if you feel fancy a whole chicken. The more expensive stuff is generally better, you want to stay away from the stuff that says it's up to X% retained brine
>a 3-5lb bag of yellow onions
>a bag of green peppers
>a bag of yellow potatoes
>2-3 heads of onions
>Like 7 jalapenos
>pic related - get this exact can. king oscar - boneless/skinless/in oil, unseasoned.
>a bag of generic white rice. Big big bag is fine. Rice is cheap + good.
>a pound or so of hot or sweet italian sausage
>pasta - like 10 boxes of the grocery store brand in a variety of shapes and sizes to find what you like
>a few jars of pasta sauce also at varying prices, see what the difference is between grocery store and Rao's
>5lbs of bread flour
>3lbs of all purpose flour
>a carton or jar of yeast (not just an individual packet)
>1+lbs of white sugar, idk if you use it in coffee or whatever
>a lb of expensive salted butter
>a lb of cheap unsalted butter
>a jar of jam
>a jar of peanut butter
>A bottle of milk if you drink milk
>a bottle of orange juice
>a bunch of bananas
>a couple tomatoes
>a head of lettuce, or some romaine if you are fancy
>2-3 avocados that are close to ripe. Should be dark green to black and a little bit soft. Once they are at the little bit soft stage, you can bag them and refrigerate anmd they stay ripe for a week or more.
>one bunch, fresh parsley
>2-3 each - lemons, limes oranges

>>15889999
>mayonnaise
>mustard
>dill pickles (not bread and butter)
>salad dressing: both types of italian style (creamy/vinaigrette) and a fancy bottle of caesar
>Expensive little bottle of extra virgin olive oil
>the maverick 88 12ga. on sale at kittery trading post and some 00 buck and some rifled slugs and a hunting shotgun bag and sling
>Cheap big bottle of vegetable or canola/rapeseed oil
>red wine, white wine, tequila, gin, rum, vodka, bourbon, scotch, rye, liquers, bitters in that order
>a brita filter pitcher if your water is sketchy
>some cheeses, whatever you want for sandwiches or anything else you might have it on. mozzarella, cheddar, swiss, and goat cheese are good places to start
>Do you have OK knives? Get the victorinox fibrox 8" chef's knife off Amazon if you do not, and their paring knife as well. Also get a sharpening steel, you should use this daily to keep your knives in good shape. You will need a stone down the line but not today
Good to go, you can now make a ton of different easy stuff that is all pretty normal to eat. This is my new englander diet and is pretty italian influenced now that think about it. You should also have seafood, but you should buy it the day you plan to cook it. It gets very bad very fast.
Here's what I would make,
>No knead bread
>Some seared chicken marinated with lemon over a cacio e pepe
>citalopram martini
>caesar salad
>chicken sandwiches, lettuce, tomato, mayo, maybe onion
>avocado toast with sardines and tomato
>peanut butter and jelly
>sausage/onion/pepper sandwiches or potato bakes
>just pasta with either sausage or chicken and regular red sauce
>glass of gamer girl pee
>chicken with rice or sausage with rice
>salads with or without grilled chicken
>bananas
>sushi

>>15885741
you have so much time! when I moved out I picked skills up one at a time across several years. I swear at 21 I could barely wipe my own ass but I was making my own bed, One step at a time, my friend.

>>15890003
>>15889999
This is me, btw im gay idk if it matters.

>>15889999
>>15890003
>>15890016
Hey thanks for the list! I'll put these in my notes and go over them soon. Thank you.
>>15890006
Yeah, one foot in front of the other. I'll get there.