/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>16855751
dent corn tastes bad raw.

>>16855767
looks cooked to me

>>16855772
it's not.

>>16855777
checked but have you been to the corn barn or how can you be so sure?

>>16855751
can I build a corn castle?

>>16855751
>keep the corn inside the barn
no you can't eat it

>>16855823
You can if you shit it out before you leave.

>>16855834
good point.

Looks like heaven on earth.

Would it be weird if I was under the corn, with a snorkeller for air, ambushing cute girls feet?

>>16855772
I want to start a Corn Can.
It would be a big pool of creamed corn.
I would let you eat it.

>>16855845
thanks man

>The first rule of Corn Barn

>>16855751
Do Americans really..?

>>16855842
That's against the RULES, faggot.

>>16856046
Well then fuck the corn barn

>>16856053
DOES NOBODY ELSE GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE CORN BARN RULES?

>>16855842
The corn would crush you

>>16856226
I AM NOT WEAK
>>16856064
I CARE NOT FOR RULES

it’s that time of year again. load the station wagon up and take the family down to the corn barn

>>16856232
Son I can tell you've never done a corn dive before

I've heard tell of folks dying in the corn barn. Follow the rules, they're for your own safety.

>>16856282
They're just having fun. They come out the other side totally fine!

>mom picks me up from school
>get happy meal from mickey d’s
>eating in car seat
>van pulls into parking lot
>”welcome to the corn barn”
>mfw

>>16856282
Golly, wouldn't it be satisfying to eat your way to the surface? Those pigeons know how to have a good time!

>>16855751
how deep does the corn go?

>>16856282
how do you get the guts out of the bread?

>>16856363
Nobody dares to find out since every expedition has been lost.

was anybody else scared of the corn creature? my brother used to tell me stories about it before we’d visit the corn barn

And they say the midwest is without culture.

>>16856448
i was, but we called it the maize monster

>>16856376
They don't. All the detritus and non-grain things are ground so fine and spread so thin that you just don't notice.

>>16856282
>those fucking pigeons flying in after seeing their brethren die
Glorious.

>>16855751
>not packing up your family to head to the local corn maze
>not gulping down apple cider and donuts while watching the kids slide through the plastic drainage pipes
>not riding the pedal tractors even though they’re way too small
>not climbing through the hay castle
>not crawling through the hay bale maze in the barns haymoy
>not taking the spooky hay ride through the woods
>not making smores over the communal fire pits

>>16856712

>>16856712
>t. Well adjusted white male with healthy family relationships and father-involved childhood
get out

>>16856718
I want to kill myself

>>16856736
It only gets worse

>>16855751
>corn barn
please explain? what is?

>>16857018
It's a Midwestern American traditional building, most of our corn-related and fertility-related rituals take place there.

>>16857038
and what are they all doing? why are they sitting in food?

>>16857043
It's not food until it's cooked

>>16857043
they aren't.
they stomp the corn for its juice, that is then used to make corn whiskey.

>>16857043
It's important to introduce the children to The Corn early to prepare them for their future careers and lives in agriculture.

>>16857046
cooked or not...
I do not sit in food.

>>16855751
__ _________ ______?

>>16857242
you wanna do what to the bunny?

>>16855751
>are you allowed to eat the corn at the corn barn?
I imagine once the season is over that's all going to be used as animal feed

>>16856695
I think I saw one grab another and try to drag in into the hole, but failed and they both survived

>>16857264
S-senpai no the cream cheese doesn't go there uwa~!

>>16855751
>hey CEO schlomo, what should we do with all this corn?
>Hmm? employee noseberg? why cant we sell it?
>It has too much glyphosate to pass inspection
>hmmm, I think I have an idea.

>>16855751
do Americans really?

>>16856302
You didn't show your feeling when

>>16856712
i did that shit one time when I was a kid and I'm fucking pissed that I'm too old now to do it again

Man, I remember visiting a maize maze and playing in the corn corner once when I was a child. It was at a farm on the edge of town, next to the concrete factory. I think they even buried some concrete drainage pipes in some dirt hills for us kids to crawl through, like a bunch of hamsters (which, incidentally, are called corn wolves where I live).

>>16855845
blessed

>>16855751
i’m kind of sad i never got to experience this as a kid

>>16857070
>>16857043
that type of corn is used for animal feed, city slicker

allowed in the sense that you're allowed to have hepatitis if you want

>>16856621
I wonder how many pigeons I have consumed over the years.

>>16857242
___ ____ ____

>>16856376
>>16856695
theres a net that prevents them from going in, they come out fine from the other side

>>16855751
what the heck are they doing in there?

>>16861222

>>16857994
Have kids, idiot

Corn is the most versatile grain. I haven't seen any rice barns. Have you? Any potato barns?

>>16863484
>he hasn't been to the legendary Potato Patio

>>16855751
>keep your head above the corn
Corn rules are written in blood

>>16855751
these idiots never read the dressmaker

>>16863511
>there could be a void beneath any kernel of corn
I know what I'll be having a nightmare about tonight.

>>16863511
>>16863528
whats up with the void? why is it there?

>>16863484

can i cum in the corn?

>>16856736
do a flip

>>16863659
Is there more of this?

>>16863675
No, she drowned in the potato silo Gotta watch for those voids

>>16855751
>keep your head above the corn
Good start to creepy pasta

>>16856282
Man, seeing their little heads disappear down into the corn gives me some serious fucking dread. Stupid ass birds, but still.

>>16863659
oo baby
Is there any more hentai for real potato lovers?

corn

>>16855751
…do Americans really?

>>16863659
>this is the most beautiful woman in Idaho

>>16856718
What
I did all those things and I'm a fucking zoomer
What's wrong with you people holy shit how fucking insulated from normal society are you that you think of going to a fucking children's farm is some unattainable long-lost ideal from the past

>>16857070
Your ass would get laughed out of the corn barn for being such a sperg.

>>16864099
Oh no, now he won't be able to sit in the food!

>>16863511
>helplessly sinking into the grain as the screw in the bottom keeps turning, knowing you will soon be ground into chunks by its rotation
Fuck..

What are the rules of the Korn barn?

>>16855751
>no throwing corn
>no diving
That’s literally the first two things any kid would want to do.
Fuck you, corn barn.

>>16864130
Iit's obvious you nwver lived among corn and absolved their culture.

>>16857994
Take your kids and do it with them. You have kids right, anon?

>>16855751
Do Americans really? they're literally playing with food while people are out there starving.

>>16864299
That's not human food you faggot. That's feed corn. It's livestock feed. Trust me you don't want to eat it because I have and even when it is fresh off the stalk at peak ripeness, it tastes like absolute shit and is basically inedible. Also, it's not our problem if others are starving. Maybe the noble Euros and Big Daddy China should get together and solve world hunger through the kindness of their hearts while we play in our feed corn. Nothing is stopping you faggots.

>>16864319
Based and correct on all counts.

>>16864319
you WILL feed the downtrodden

>>16864319
Eat your bugs

>>16864116
put freaks on a leash

>>16855845
>I will never ever swim and eat in a pool of cream corn with my fellow /ck/ bros....
Fuck

>>16856712
This fellow Midwest anon knows whats up.

>>16864299
NOOOOOOOOO SOME PEOPLE SPENT ENTIRE MILLENNIA ELECTING THEIR LEADERS SOLELY BY AGE AND DANCING IN CIRCLES WITH PAINTED FACES INSTEAD OF CULTIVATING CROPS AND IT'S OUR FAULT THAT THEY'RE STARVING

>>16864387
This retard's still seething

>>16855751
is this in mass?

>>16865376
Do Americans really have mass in the corn barn?

>>16864116
>>16864351

>>16865386
makes sense a thirdie like you doesn't understand the basic nuances of language, you're thinking en masse

>>16864095
Calm down and take the corn cob out of your ass, boy. It's a joke.

>>16865398
You're the one failing to differentiate between Massachusetts and mass (the religious ceremony). Must suck to have American education.

>>16865401
What's the joke

>>16856282
this is so damn satisfying

>>16865511
>t.cat

>>16865455
It's observational humour regarding people who get humorously upset about mundane things, idyllic families in this case. Have you never seen a soyjak before?

>>16865537
Anon was posting the soyjack in reply to >>16856712, making the point that the greentext is somehow some kind of tradwank lifestyle which would make you go "ugh...I want to go back".

>>16855751
Never complain about where you live. Some people have to live in the midwest USA.

>>16865588
I think in practice, there's a difference between posting a soyjak and quoting their entire post (implying that post was soy) versus posting a soyjak with a paraphrased reaction (implying people who react to posts like that are soy). It's a surprisingly complex meme with a lot of deep interpretation required.

>>16865453
oh you're one of those

>>16865615
Are you retarded? The joke was that "in mass" can mean "in a Catholic church service", the phrase "en masse" had nothing to do with it

>>16859939
farmer here, we all remove the cover from screw conveyors to prevent straw from clogging the silo.
those pigeons are minced meat

>>16865629
no the joke was asking him if he was in mass, not in mass
retard

>>16864099
why would I ever go to a corn barn. what is the point. are those people retarded?

please, less explaining jokes and more making jokes, i come to /ck/ to laugh

>>16865665
lmao imagine not going to the corn barn

>>16865671
>i come to /ck/ to laugh
that's unkind anon some retard post genuine recipes here

I come to /ck/ to weep.

>>16865689
weep your meringues am i right nigga

>>16864299
>they're literally playing with food while people are out there starving.

>>16865613
You don't really "get" 4chan, do you

>>16863484
>Any potato barns

Actually worked in one. 10 feet high, 40 feet wide, 300 feet long of potatoes. It smells so fucking bad.

>>16857264
>No one posted it
I guess this is my burden to bear.

>>16865960
Smells like an Irish whore house

>>16865665
What’s “the point” of going to the British Museum or the Louvre?

>>16863641
Chambers excavated by corn spiders

>>16866025
to not lay in corn?

>>16866061
>not laying in corn wherever you go
sorry?

>>16865988
Kek

>>16863511

"Flow of granular media" is a topic with many open theoretical questions, as well as practical potential nightmares for structural engineers.

t. used to know a professor of engineering mechanics

>>16866061
It is clearly apparent from OP pic that most people are comfortably sitting in the corn, not laying in it.
However, laying in the corn does not appear to violate any of the Corn Barn Rules. As such, the freedom to either lay in the corn or not is entirely up to you.

>>16856282
Wait, theres meat in my cornmeal?

>>16864110
The sheer heat and pressure will kill you long before you reach the bottom.

>>16863659
Hot

somebody post it

>>16855842
>coomer can't follow the corn barn rules
Typical>>16855836