/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>7535422
>>tfw 19 years old, can't get alcohol
Get older friends faggot

>>7535422
Just tell the bum outside you'll pay for his 40 if he goes in the store and buys the beers

>>7535422
That seems kinda expensive for half gal of grape juice motherfucker

>>7535422
in what region were the grapes grown

absolutely unimaginable desu

we got hammered with 15 already

>>7535438
I know but I'm at college and there are no grocery stores near here

>inb4 if you're at college it should be easy to get alcohol

>>7535442
Why can't you do this >>7535432 Replace the bum with another student who is 21if needed

My eight grade English teacher once told our class that you can take a sip from a jug of cider, put the cap back on and place it in a dark, cool place and in a couple of weeks you'll have hard cider. I suspect that he was yanking our chain.

>>7535466
That works if the cider is unpasteurized

>>7535422
>half gallon
>16 dollars
what the FUCK

>>7535422
Underaged bait fuck off

Damn, $16? You might as well just make sugar water and jam some cheap fruit in there.

Clean your stuff, and I mean clean it properly, don't just fuck about with an old dishcloth. Use something transparent so you can see when it starts to settle, it'll take a few weeks at least. Don't bother trying to heat it, you'll just fuck it up. Stretch a balloon over the top of your container and pin a few holes in it for a shitty makeshift valve. Siphon it into a new container to get it off the crap at the bottom. I have no idea what I'm actually talking about, you should really just google this.

buy/steal vanilla extract and drink it like shots with a chaser

>>7535543

shit that's a good [well not really but in the circumstances] idea

thanks

I used to make hard cider before I was 21. Pretty easy and cheap.

Just get some Apple juice, yeast, brown sugar, cinnamon for extra flavor, and a balloon.

Pour some of the juice into a saucepan with some sugar. Heat it up until the sugar dissolves. More sugar=more yeast food=more alcohol.

Pour this back into the bottle. Add the yeast while it's slightly warm.

Put the balloon over the top and poke some holes in it so gas can escape.
Make sure everything during the process is clean. You don't want to risk any kind of contamination.

Let it ferment in a cool dark spot for a good week or two. It will be naturally carbonated and surprisingly isn't bad. The dead yeast will collect on the bottom. It tastes better if you filter that out.

Wa la.

>be 12
>new years day
>parents get beers
>sneak a can
>empty it down my throat
>don't get drunk somehow

>>7535422
Why would you want to drink, anon? It's bad for you.

>>7535422

Won't work.

>Ingredients: Concord Grape Juice, Potassium Metabisulfite Added To Enhance Freshness.

Potassium Metabisulfite is used to stop fermentation by removing oxygen, something yeast needs to make al/ck/y.

>>7535422
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kilju

>>7535466
People used to make booze by chewing things like corn or potatoes and spitting them out to start fermentation. It's still done today in some parts of the world. In South America some rural people still make corn beer that way, it's called Chicha de Muko.

>>7535466
Why not just drink the cider? It's already booze.

>>7535892
Americans have this odd thing of calling pressed apple juice "cider", and calling cider "hard cider".

Silly Americans.

That juice has potassium metabisulfite, a preservative, as well as a bunch of fake sugar. It won't ferment, dum dum.

>>7536068

>>7535422
>paying $15 for a half-gal of grape juice.

There's some things that college can't fix.

>>7536094
see
>>7535756

>>7536068
>calling cider "hard cider"
So what do they call it when it's frozen?

>>7536127
yeah i cancelled that because i realized it was retarded

took the bus to the store, bought some apple juice. gonna make hard cider

>>7536136
You can't make hard cider with pasturized apple juice, buddy. Just find an upperclassman who can buy you booze, or go through whoever sells you weed

>>7536135

nothing

>>7536139

u wot

http://www.homebrewtalk.com/showthread.php?t=86398

>this desperate to drink
Pretty sad desu. 12 year olds do shit like this.

>>7536139
Jesus Christ.

>>7536146

i'm not an alcoholic...it's just school is stressful, i want to chill out after a long day and have a drink

well, that combined with being made to feel like a petulant child for wanting to drink a thing in this country

>>7536146
12 year olds drink listerine

>>7536139
Sure you can. I have.

>>7536139
>You can't make hard cider with pasturized apple juice, buddy.

The fuck do you think pasteurisation is?

>>7536135
apple jack

>>7535422

>29 years old and do the exact same thing

>>7535422
If you google how to make wine there are some really comptonensive guides.
But the short not well done guide
You need either fresh fruit juice or no preservatives
Mix yeast and juice in a large container
Apply air tight seal and make a u valve with a balloon attached to the end so that co2 can escape but air can't enter
After the time is up you need to siphon out the wine cause there will be a big ass yeast cake
Add preservatives

But really just google it

make some friends?

>>7535683
does it have to be brewers' yeast or can I use baking yeast?

>>7535683
oh and how much sugar?

>>7535697
You have to open the can dingus.

>>7536626
I always used baking yeast. Came out just fine.

>>7535422
It would be WAAAAAY easier, and cheaper too, if you just made friends with someone who is either 21 or has a fake ID and then payed them to buy you a case of PBR or some similar poor man's beer.

>>7535452
>Replace the bum with another student who is 21if needed
You know I had some fucking Indian come into my room and ask me to buy him alcohol for him just because we were both civil engineering majors.
I literally told that guy to look around at my room, I need nothing, there is nothing you have that can convince me to buy you booze.
This was in Chico California where there are literally cops posing as people that want you to buy them alcohol.
I also had a sick decanter on my desk filled with whiskey and two cups like a badass (or huge tool who knows).

>>7536653
It's been a while since i've made it, but i'd estimate about 1/4 cup. A little goes a long a way.

>>7536657
It works but you end up with a fuck of a lot more yeast flavour. Kind of nice in a mead.

>>7535683
Also is the cinnamon put in after you heat it or before? Going to try this, thanks.

>>7536671
What an asshole

>>7536711
Did you not get to the end of the post, you should have just said you are a huge tool.

>>7536697
Couple, things you should know, because anon's recipe is retarded. What he's describing is gonna be a 2% ABV turd. You'll need a lot more than a quarter cup. Get a gallon of apple juice with no added sugar and add about 10oz to a pound of sugar to it. Don't use a whole packet of yeast, use like, a quarter or half. Don't put the yeast in the juice until it's under 100 fahrenheit. Let it ferment for a month, at least. Go until the balloon starts to deflate. Don't filter it, siphon it.

http://www.warpbreach.com/6/6.html

I remember someone posted this in Better Living Through Chemistry in 2000 on totse.

It's the only thing that came to mind.

You're supposed to inflate the balloon? What about the poking holes part?

>>7536750
>>7536738

>>7536750
Poke a pinhole in the top of the balloon, that's just to allow gas to escape, the balloon will still inflate a bit, and as long as it does so there is still fermentation. Once it's deflated fermentation is done.

>>7536750
If you're going to poke holes, there's no point using a balloon.

>>7536750
The balloon will inflate from the carbon dioxide (and possibly some other gasses) shit out by the yeast. The balloon's purpose is to allow gas out, by inflating and pushing itself out the holes, while keeping outside air outside. It just works. When it starts to deflate that means the yeast has stopped shitting and is either starving from running out of sugar or it's home has become too alcoholic to live in (it's living in it's own waste).

>>7536766
>>7536770
Cool, thanks for the information

>Multiple solutions required
>TWICE

>>7536738
pic related is the yeast i have, so like a teaspoon?

>>7536671
and this isn't entrapment or anything?

>>7536950
If you are female, I find that touching my cooch before I work with the juice is sufficient

>>7537058
Also if your a fine young gentleman you can always play wack a mole with your zucchini shafts until it spits out its lovely reward of fresh squeezed penis pulp. Hope this helps :)

>>7535422
In burgerland adults have to wait 'till 21 to drink.
Meanwhile in develloped countries, parents responsably educate their childrens to alcohol as early as 12. Theses childrens not only get a sense for handling alcohol but also learn to appreciate it and rarely engage in binge drinking later because it just seems wasteful to them.

I used to do this with apple cider, sugar and bread yeast

after about a week the result was a sweet, but mildly alcoholic cider. it was drinkable, but nothing good. and it gave you a pretty bad hangover.

all you really need is an airlock that fits on those plastic bottles, and champagne yeast which doesn't give off so many hangover causing tanins. I didn't even do that though I just activated the yeast, added the sugar, and waited about a week with the lid cracked and covered with a towel.