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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 296 KB, 352x433, Ham.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233424 No.14233424[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Hello and welcome to Hail Mary, Greenpoint's finest diner. My name is Ham and I'll be your server today.

How many will be dining with us today?

>> No.14233429

0, but can I get your number you look just like my wife's (male) type

>> No.14233440

>>14233424
13, separate checks, and I'll have a 50/50 Coca-Cola and Fanta

>> No.14233450

>>14233424
You've got fried chicken? I'll take a whole bird, feet on of course

>> No.14233461

anywhere between 13 and 88, some of them haven't rsvp'd yet

>> No.14233473
File: 396 KB, 640x427, hailmaryint.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233473

>>14233440
Oh don't worry, despite being right near Pauly Gee's, where people wait 90 minutes for brunch, there's always plenty of room at Hail Mary. Grab a seat anywhere you like.

>> No.14233491
File: 102 KB, 942x511, hmchicken.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233491

>>14233450
Why you're in luck! Here at Hail Mary, chicken is our specialty and we make it fancy AF.

You can get an order of chicken for only $58, or $32 for a half bird.

>> No.14233492

>>14233424
Hi Ham, it's just me today.

Oh, don't leave, I'm ready to order.

I'll have a whole Hot Fried Sasso chicken with all the fixin's for $58 and the $15 shake with safforn mochi and rose sprinkles on top, please.

>> No.14233505

>>14233491
No fucking way that's really what they were serving?

>> No.14233508
File: 51 KB, 500x360, 1545095807895.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233508

>>14233424
>Being this mad that a girl with problem glasses ruined your friendship simulator

>> No.14233513

>>14233424
why does he look so...repulsive

>> No.14233517

>>14233505
100% yes. The feet make it QUIRKY!

Also:
>This is probably why people assumed this was an "ethnic" thing for Solah and her Husband, not because they can't grasp why a brown person would make burgers

>> No.14233542
File: 1.31 MB, 936x614, charredsalad.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233542

>>14233492
An excellent choice. Perhaps I could also interest you in a salad?

>> No.14233551

>>14233542
Looks like burned lawn trimmings with the crumbs from the previous table brushed on.

I'll take 2 orders, plus the BLOOD OF CHRIST cocktail, please.

>> No.14233572

>>14233542
The saddest part is that THIS is the one they decide to show off

>> No.14233581

>>14233542
good golly gee that sure looks delish!

how much is it?

>> No.14233594

>>14233424
What the fuck, this is generic American diner food, not authentic South Asian cuisine like I was expecting!!!!

>> No.14233608
File: 105 KB, 500x507, 1566174410304.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233608

>>14233542
>mfw I thought this was a joke, but it was real.

>> No.14233623
File: 64 KB, 768x511, DSC_0370-768x511.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233623

>>14233505
Of course! we aim to please. One order, coming right up!

>> No.14233635
File: 63 KB, 480x640, cocktails.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14233635

>>14233581
$13. About the same prices as our cocktails. Might I recommend the "A trick is something a whore does for money"? It's a personal favorite

>> No.14233660

is ham short for something

>> No.14233665

>>14233660
hamish probably

>> No.14233668

>>14233660
idk maybe his dad hated him and had a weird sense of irony, naming a middle eastern guy "ham"

>> No.14233676

WHEN I SAY HAM

YOU SAY BURGER


HAM

>> No.14233679

>>14233676
Deconstructed daily grind
burger

>> No.14233691

>>14233424
>be fat
>be called ham
bruh

>> No.14233695

>>14233660
hamothy

>> No.14233699

>>14233660
Hamlet

>> No.14233726

>>14233691
>Be fat
>Be called ham
>Marry a fat girl
bruh

>> No.14233796

>>14233726
>girl
lol! when they find your post history you're gonna get cancelled m8.

>> No.14233854

>>14233424
Is that fucking Simon from Yogpod?

>> No.14235168

>>14233854
Nah, it's Solah from Bon Appetit's husband who opened a really shitty, overpriced "upscale diner" in Brooklyn with her. It failed for reasons you've seen in this thread and then they just blamed it on racism instead of being bad at business

>> No.14235188

>>14233424
Yeah....gimme a burger with that ethnic spice that smells like armpit. I like that.

>> No.14235214
File: 68 KB, 750x1000, o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14235214

I'll have whatever this was supposed to be. Are there payment plans?

>> No.14235260

>>14235214
A tortilla de patatas burger.

>> No.14235270

>>14233635

Whoa, I'm not sure I like that terminology you're using... "whore" seems a little derogatory towards sex-workers.

>> No.14235271

>>14233424
If I was ever greeted like this in a restaurant, I would walk right back out the door

>> No.14235596

>Hail Mary, the cute gourmet "diner" on Greenpoint Avenue, closed over the weekend after less than a year in the neighborhood. This is sad news for mac and cheese lovers, funfetti fanatics, and anyone who enjoys high quality comfort food in a cozy, welcoming environment. If you love a restaurant, go there frequently, or risk saying farewell.

>> No.14235616

Why do places like this make poor flyovers seethe so hard? The decor is cool, the chicken looks pretty good and the prices are relatively standard for the area.

>> No.14235626

>>14233660
>>14233668
It's a semitic name from the OT

>> No.14235630

>>14233491
Le cringe

>> No.14235870

>>14235616
Because their poorcuck wages of less than 40k a year or neetbux can't afford it.

>> No.14235885

>>14235616
Rent free.

t. not even a yank

>> No.14235891

>>14235885
It's hardly rent free when you see them seethe every thread.

>> No.14235895

>>14235616
Anyone got prices? I'm going to go ahead and assume it wasn't priced 'relatively standard for the area'. These places always open up with some gimmick and try to charge 50% more than their competitors because they think they're worth it, only to get assblasted when they find out the cold hard truth that most of their customers will just go to somewhere cheaper.

>> No.14235943

>>14235895
They charged 32 dollars for a drumstick and a wing

>> No.14236083

>>14235616
>flyovers
I'm the one who posted it and I live in NYC, maybe 15 mins from this place. The reason this is so funny is because this place is entirely unremarkable. You'll never stand out as a restaurant in NYC with "cool decor", a boring menu. It's practically johnny fucking rockets, but with fried chicken feet.

The prices are fine (minus the whole $58 fried chicken thing). They're standard for the area. But I'd never consider stepping foot into this place given all of the great brunch spots in the area.

also, have you seen the front door? NYC is all about foot traffic, and you'd never know this place was a restaurant from the outside.

>> No.14236104
File: 1.96 MB, 1378x1038, tripadvisor.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14236104

>>14235895
>>14235895
Tripadvisor had some pics. I'd say the prices are comparable for the neighborhood, if you actually got what you ordered (i.e. $13 for a one of the veggie sides isnt outrageous, but the fact that the side ends up looking like this horseshit >>14233542 makes me refuse to pay $13 for it)

>> No.14236106

>>14233623
Nooooooooo. Nooooooooooooooo.
Please don’t tell me they bring it out in that.

>> No.14236112

>>14233635
That is the most horrific font they could have chosen.

>> No.14236154

>>14233635
They don’t even have a watered down signature “hail mary bloody mary” marked up to god knows what? This place can’t be in business anymore. But you can bleed money for a long time before getting shut down.

>> No.14236182
File: 45 KB, 442x537, ancient roman chicken.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14236182

Can someone explain to me how we're all 'racist' to this bitch, but she can take the piss out of our religions but using basically blasphemy to name her restaurant and cocktails?

Not religious, btw, just interested in this 'logic'.

>> No.14236190

>>14233424
why is your name Ham and why are you looking at my 5 year old son the way you were looking at the ice cream when we came in?

>> No.14236198

>>14236106
based on the tattoos it looks like it might be ham himself.

>> No.14237032

>>14236182
Religions are stupid and should be ridiculed. Praise the sun or fuck off moron