/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.16270070]

Would it be disrespectful for me to eat the thousands of cans of soup and beans my dad left behind in the basement? He started hoarding them back in the 90s.

[Anonymous No.16270107]

>>16270070
>eating it all
God speed. Your time on this planet was brief, but you shined brighter than any candle.

[Anonymous No.16270135]

>>16270070
no, it would honor him

[Anonymous No.16270163]

>>16270070
Is he dead or are you talking about swiping his survival rations bit by bit?

[Anonymous No.16270176]

>>16270070
If he's dead then go for it.

[Anonymous No.16270178]

>>16270070
eat it all in one sitting and live stream it

[Anonymous No.16270385]

>>16270163
Fucking kek. I’m imaging OP in his 30s, moving back into his parent’s basement, and gradually working through his dad’s entire supply of emergency rations while not jerking off to Chinese cartoons even though his parents still cook him 3 squares a day, complete with sneaking the empty cans out of the house at night so they won’t be noticed in the garbage. Just wait until your dad eventually comes down and wades through the piles of clothes and trash on the floor and discovers his rations gone.

>>16270178
I’d pay to see that.

[Anonymous No.16270415]

i'd be wary of 30 year old canned food

[Anonymous No.16270437]

>>16270385
That reminds me of my fat ass cousin.
Her parents tried to control every calorie she consumed.
Despite their efforts, she never lost weight.
Later they found that she's been eating the canned food in the basement.
No one ever noticed, because she was cutting out the bottom of the cans and putting them back on the shelves.
She'd rearrange the cans so the empty ones would always be on bottom and the back, but eventually there were so many empty cans that they found like 90% of them were empty.

[Anonymous No.16270440]

>>16270163
if he’s dead, clearly the “survival” rations were useless

[Anonymous No.16270448]

post time stamp

[Anonymous No.16270452]

>>16270437
Imagine the smell of all that rotting residue.

[Anonymous No.16270463]

>>16270385
OP obviously means that his dad died and left behind the cans

[Anonymous No.16270473]

>>16270452
She cleaned all the cans.

[Anonymous No.16270503]

>>16270437
Jesus wept I was just having a laugh memeing on the neckbeard basement thing. Reading the real version is just sad. Genuine mental illness is at play there.

>>16270463
Here’s your Reddit gold.

[Anonymous No.16270525]

>>16270503
>Genuine mental illness is at play there.
Oh yeah. She's severely mentally ill. She used to be rail thin. But apparently one of the pills in her cocktail causes her to have a massive appetite.

[Anonymous No.16271678]

>>16270525
>But apparently one of the pills in her cocktail causes her to have a massive appetite.
no shit?

[Anonymous No.16272028]

>>16270415
>i'd be wary of 30 year old canned food
why? canned food is good until the cans rust or swell.

[Anonymous No.16272057]

>>16270437
>No one ever noticed, because she was cutting out the bottom of the cans and putting them back on the shelves.

[Anonymous No.16272064]

>>16270437
this shit is wild
You have a fucked up family anon

[Anonymous No.16272515]

>>16270437
She sounds like a /ck/ poster

[Anonymous No.16272525]

>>16270437
What the actual fuck anon. Getting some real People Under the Stairs vibes

[Anonymous No.16273131]

>>16270437
>She'd rearrange the cans so the empty ones would always be on bottom and the back

[Anonymous No.16273201]

>>16270070
How do you even know it was your dad who put them there? Checked fingerprints on the cans?

[Anonymous No.16273207]

>>16270070
I'm sorry for your loss.

[Anonymous No.16273316]

>>16270070
just start with the older stuff, he wouldent want it going bad.

[Anonymous No.16273738]

>>16270437
Man, and people say food addiction isn't a thing

Imagine being so fat you'll fish out a can of beans from the basement, shovel them into your mouth cold, and then put them back hoping noone will find out. How fucking sad

[Anonymous No.16274465]

>>16270437
Reminds me of King of the Hill when LuAnne's mom was popping holes in the bottom of Hank's beers.

[Anonymous No.16274485]

>>16270070
he did it for you
because he loves you
he wanted you to make it
and you would even consider disgracing his loving memory

i spit on you

[Anonymous No.16274540]

>>16274485
Nice filename, zoomer.

[Anonymous No.16274548]

>>16270070
It's what he would have wanted. Godspeed

[Anonymous No.16274570]

you could be a good boy and compost the contents and recycle the cans.

[Anonymous No.16274573]

>>16274540
how would a zoomer know of parental beatings?
lol you're such a dumb fuck

[Anonymous No.16275430]

>>16270070
blow em up dog. tannerite, napalm, fertilizer, black powder the works.
tie it al together and get you some kind of propellant. send that shit into the sky on the fourth over a huge crowd and make it rain blood.

[Anonymous No.16276963]

>>16272028
Not the ones who have a tab you use to pull them open. Those have a short shelf life.

[Anonymous No.16277433]

>>16270070
Do it and post results

[Anonymous No.16277443]

Is this the American equivalent of aging wine?

[Anonymous No.16277457]

>>16277443

Nothing compares to a vintage Boyardee

[Anonymous No.16277849]

>>16270385
I let a friend of mine move in with me for a while until
>a few months
turned into a year and I told him to GTFO. His parents brought him food but he ate most of my emergency pasta, a bunch of my canned fish and, here's the real kicker, DOZENS OF POUNDS OF MY SUGAR. DOZENS. He bought his own sugar for Kool-Aid so IDK what the fuck he was doing, just eating that shit plain I guess. This was in addition to him drinking liters of soda per day. Dude would chug them down like water.

[Anonymous No.16277861]

>>16270070
tst

[Anonymous No.16277939]

>>16270437

[Anonymous No.16278018]

>>16273207
did ever establish whether the old cunt was dead or not?

if ded them it would be a horrible disrespect to eat ded dad's supplies. You might as well eat them, then shit in the can and go down and hurl cans of your own shit at his gravestone.

If the old fucker is still alive then easy hos fucking bomb shelter prepper bullshit. It will be funny just to see the smug cunt go down to his shelter and realize his rathole is empty and the zombie communists are advancing on his position.

[Anonymous No.16278041]

>>16270503
Summer already?

[Anonymous No.16278145]

>>16277849
there's a reason people have 'roommates'. they're dysfunctional humans more than half the time.
my old (college) roommate was a competitive gamer on a scholarship for it, and he ate nothing but raising canes tendies that his parents gave him money for. he would leave everything on the counters, never put it in the trash, break anything down, and when there wasn't space on the previously clean, organized countertops he'd throw his trash away in the bathroom trashcan, and when i didn't pay for more trashbags for the bathroom he started hanging plastic bags around doorknobs in the apt and he'd fill those up. fuck LoL, fuck raising canes, and fuck roommates.

[Anonymous No.16278194]

>>16270437
>my fatass cousin
This should be good lads
>she
Wtf!I'm cooming

[Anonymous No.16278547]

>>16278145
Yeah that's that fat faggot in a nutshell except he couldn't even dedicate his NEET time to getting good at games. Living alone truly is GOAT, the next time anyone moves in with me it's going to be the woman I'm marrying.

[Anonymous No.16278767]

>>16270437
I love this story.
Upvoted.

[Anonymous No.16278823]

>>16271678
zyprexa

[Anonymous No.16278854]

>>16270437
heist of the century

[Anonymous No.16278891]

>>16270437
This is by far the most desperate fatass story I've ever heard.

[Anonymous No.16278904]

>>16270525
>gear
>but for architects
noice

[Anonymous No.16279107]

>>16270176
>>16270163
>>16278018
>>16273207
>>16270463
OP here, I'd like to clarify that my dad is still very much alive, he just moved to a retirement home and left the house (and taxes/utilities) with me.

[Anonymous No.16279160]

>>16278145
>there's a reason people have 'roommates'
Poverty?

[Anonymous No.16279355]

>>16270070