/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.19223757]

You will eat ze mucus
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFyd-kC6IUw

We will genetically modify all our plants to have mucus producing penises auto-fertilizing ze soil and you will eat ze mucus plants.

[Anonymous No.19223765]

crop field, Earth, 2023

[Anonymous No.19223766]

you will not take your meds

[Anonymous No.19223770]

crop field, Earth, 2067

[Anonymous No.19223773]

In a more serious tone. If this shit actually can capture nitrogen from the air, and we really would adopt it in all our gene modified plants, wouldn't that fuck with the composition of air of Earth, and ultimately with us? Too high oxygen % hurts the human brain. We could essentially dumb down the earth's population with such miracle tech.

[Anonymous No.19223791]

>>19223757
I fucking love science, unironically.

[Anonymous No.19223796]

>>19223773
It's easy to produce nitrogen and release it into the atmosphere, if it ever came to that, while nitrogen absorption rates of plants feom fertilizers are bad and a lot of it ends up as water pollution.

[Anonymous No.19223799]

>>19223773
It's not like nitrogen is lost in the process, it will eventualy go back into the atmosphere

[Anonymous No.19223802]

>eating medicated slime while the elites eat grassfed steak tartar in order to own the elites and capitalism

[Anonymous No.19223803]

You want eat ze pizza? Ze pizza came from flour from jizz producing wheat. You want eat ze pickle? Ze pickle is mucus cucumber. All ze plants will be mucus plantz and you will eat ze plantz and you will like it.

You want ze Coca Cola? Ze coca cola will haz high fructose corn starch from ze mucus maize.

You want ze organique egg? Ze chicken laying ze egg will eat ze mucus plantz.

You want ze freedom friez? Ze freedom friez came from sperm producing potato plantz that jizz onto themselvez quite gayly.

Gay mucus sperm plantz are the future and you won't evade zem.

[Anonymous No.19223807]

>>19223796
>It's easy to produce nitrogen and release it into the atmosphere, if it ever came to that
sauce?

[Anonymous No.19223821]

this will literally blow your brain

>humanity adopts gay nitrogen capturing mucus plants that jizz onto themselves very homosexually
>omg, not enough nitrogen, we must make nitrogen farting cows
>turns out that we acted too soon, the nitrogen captured by the gay plants return to the atmosphere eventually
>but now we have all this extra nitrogen in the air
>omg, we must produce oxygen farting cows to have the optimal air composition
>too much nitrogen and oxygen produced
>air pressure grows rapidly
>humanity's brains literally explode

[Anonymous No.19223829]

>>19223757
I'm trying to start an incestuous relationship with my sister. Should I forward her this (she's a nutritionist). It's pretty suggestive isn't it

[Anonymous No.19223837]

>>19223829
"Hi, sis!

I saw this video and it immediately made me think about you. Something about goopy jizz dropping from the tip of red rods reminds me of you. Do you know what that could be? I have no idea myself.

xxxx
ur brother"

[Anonymous No.19223939]

>>19223773
Nitrogen is 78% of the atmosphere, I don't think we could remove enough to change that significantly.

[Anonymous No.19223942]

>>19223837
Godspeed based perv

[Anonymous No.19223988]

>>19223939
currently only one plant steals the nitrogen from the air

if all plants could that would destroy earth forever

[Anonymous No.19224034]

>>19223988
The bacteria it has in its mucus are normally in soil, the video explains this. The nitrogen they use in artificial fertiliser also comes from the air so this would in fact draw less nitrogen from the air since the plants would just absorb what they need whereas with artificial fertiliser they have to be given twice what they actually use.

[Anonymous No.19224585]

It freaks me out when my ag news feed stuff ends up on /ck/
Its just not a good fit.

Also for anyone wondering, yes this discovery is a BFD

[Anonymous No.19224604]

>>19224585
>ag
>BFD
sorry, what?

[Anonymous No.19224632]

>>19224585
>>19224604
Big fucking deal. Also I'm withholding my judgment until implementation because there's lots of planet saving big fucking deals going on that aren't panning out because of funding and adoption speed, like plastic eating bacteria enzymes.

[Anonymous No.19224637]

>>19223799
>>19223939
>>19223796
>>19223773
>fix one problem by potentially causing another huge problem
>d-don't worry guys it'll be perfectly fine, we can solve that issue too if it happens
kek this surely will go perfectly well. Humans have totally not completely lied or botched their estimates before.

[Anonymous No.19224653]

>>19224637
but think about the size of them mucus tomatoes, boi

[Anonymous No.19224683]

so nitrogen fixing bacteria live in ze slime and then nitrogen diffuses into it and the resulting ammonia diffuses into the plant? neat. this is of course useful for making food, but more importantly it's useful for making explosives

[Anonymous No.19224702]

>>19224632
I too (the ag guy) am skeptical because it came to us so far out of left field.
That said if you have any idea how hard it is to fix nitrogen naturally , you know how badly a breakthrough like this is needed
The reason so many ag people are eating this up is because the process is so similar to how legumes fix nitrogen
It looks fucking real to me so far

[Anonymous No.19224795]

>>19223757
>This [x] Could Change The World

[Anonymous No.19224809]

>>19224795
plants auto-fertilizing themselves would radically change the world, yes

[Anonymous No.19224817]

>>19224809
It's only nitrogen, peak phosphorus and peak potassium will still destroy civilisation regardless.

[Anonymous No.19224839]

>>19224702
>run up on a lady minding her own business
>trap her with your massive pincers in front of your face
>fug her good
>toss the used whore off your branch
What a life

[Anonymous No.19224845]

>>19224637
lots of plants fix have structures that facilitate nitrogen fixing. this one just happens to also have starchy seeds. stay in your lane.

[Anonymous No.19224847]

>>19224637
lots of plants have structures that facilitate nitrogen fixing. this one just happens to also have starchy seeds. stay in your lane.

[Anonymous No.19224860]

>>19224795
You change the world every second you’re alive, friend.

[Anonymous No.19224931]

>>19224845
do they capture nitrogen from fukken air tho?

[Anonymous No.19224936]

>>19224931
>>19224847

[Anonymous No.19224938]

>>19224637
Two more weeks and you're under the ocean landlubber.

[Anonymous No.19224949]

>>19224931
>>19224936
yes, it's atmospheric nitrogen. it's been happening for billions of years. nitrogen is not something that needs to be rationed, even in space. nitrogen is never brought to the international space station on purpose because it's not worth the weight. they have only what was already there and happens to be in any spacecraft that docks.

[Anonymous No.19225013]

>>19224949
>atmospheric nitrogen
not above ground

[Anonymous No.19225279]

>>19224632
Plastic eating bacteria would be one of the biggest disasters ever unleashed on the human race. Imagine if, overnight, all plastic just magically turned into paper or some other organic material that could become rotten. Cars and computers would all disintegrate and stop working in a matter of days or weeks. Plastic water bottles and food containers would rot along with their contents, nearly instantly spoiling the global food supply. The PVC pipes in your house would dissolve and there would be no more running water. It would most likely mean the death of billions of people because Earth's entire infrastructure and economy basically depends on plastic not being digestible by bacteria.

In the absolute best case scenario, after the mass extinction, they would invent a new material that isn't biodegradable to take the place of plastic, which would present the same environmental risks that plastic currently does while also being more expensive to manufacture and having worse structural properties.

[Anonymous No.19225309]

>>19225279
Afaik the bacteria itself isn't plastic eating, it produces an enzyme that can be harvested and applied in isolation like a gel/paint/spray etc similar to PVC chemical glue.

[Anonymous No.19225338]

>>19223757
Once thing at a time, I'm not even allowed to buy ze bugs in grocery stores yet.

[Anonymous No.19225642]

>>19223757
I'm not paying extra food corn cum
If you sneak tax me I'm going full nigga and stealing from the store

[Anonymous No.19225777]

>>19225279
It’s super pointless then, why not just burn it then?

[Anonymous No.19226327]

>>19225279
in reality, it wouldn't work like alien blood.

it would be like everything that can eat wood

[Anonymous No.19226397]

>>19226327
You think it would turn out ok if an appreciable portion of computers and cars were suddenly made out of wood?

[Anonymous No.19226475]

>>19223757
>mfw you can all run naked backwards through a field of dicks

[Anonymous No.19226516]

>>19223773
>wouldn't that fuck with the composition of air of Earth
it might shock you, but the planet's air composition has changed constantly.
half of the reason why there were so many "giant" versions of creatures a few million years ago was literally because there was a much higher % ratio of oxygen in the atmosphere, as bigger creatures need much more oxygen to breath.
modern insects are at the limit of how big they can be for the current % of oxygen in the atmosphere, because of how their respitory system works

shit's like 9th grade science

[Anonymous No.19226749]

>>19224702
That was the single most Chad thing I have ever witnessed.

[Anonymous No.19227224]

>>19223988
This isn't true though. There are tons of nitrogen fixing plants/crops like clover and most legumes

The video is specifically talking about corn

[Anonymous No.19227274]

>something new useful is introduced
>schizos start screeching it is teh jooz

[Anonymous No.19227626]

>>19226749
we might be going back to that system

[Anonymous No.19227669]

>>19227274
Fake: Anon likes pop science
Gay: Anon likes plant mucus on his penis

[Anonymous No.19227683]

>>19227669
Literally anything scientific except THE most cutting edge discoveries can be described as pop science because the only criteria to be called pop science is non academic media coverage.

[Anonymous No.19227698]

>>19227683
it seems you don't have the intuition to tell when something is pop sci or not, but if it mentions some absurd retarded thing that sounds like a bad sci fi novel

[Anonymous No.19227756]

>>19227698
Those corm plants are real though, not pop science lies

[Anonymous No.19227788]

>>19223837
xoxo instead of xxxx. otherwise, send it

[Anonymous No.19227792]

>>19224604
bofa deez nuts lmao

[Anonymous No.19227900]

>>19223757
man there's a lot of shots playing with the tip drip in that

[Anonymous No.19229022]

Beard man said global south, a dog whistle for irresponsible non-whites.