shhhh... /ck/ secrets that know one knows you do.

[Anonymous No.20470986]

I add a shot of my tequila stash to my iced tea when my wife isn't looking.

[Anonymous No.20471061]

>>20470986
>when my wife isn't looking
why? what is she going to do about it?

[Anonymous No.20471101]

>>20470986
I bet she gets good and nice after that, but don't admit anything.
FYC
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcD6hsiAW60

[Anonymous No.20471103]

>>20471061
>go berserk
>call him a drunk
>threaten to call the cops on him for being drunk
That's what my mom does, at least. Also, I'm 32 and wish I was dead.

[Anonymous No.20471113]

I don't wash my tasting spoon when cooking nearly as often as I should

[Anonymous No.20471126]

>>20471113
According to biden that's a felony!

[Anonymous No.20471162]

>>20471103
Maybe if you weren't a 32 year old alcoholic living with his mom she might loosen up

[Anonymous No.20471187]

If I offer food to someone then I practiced safe cooking at levels beyond most restaurants.

If I cook for myself I don't wash my hands, 5 second rule for shit that falls, usually drunk/high, and I often smell the sweat on my balls. Ball sweat adds umami.

[Anonymous No.20471203]

>>20471162
my mom and I used to get wasted until she passed away. Not even my faggot brothers would drink with us because their wives wouldn't let them. I also used to beat my wife if she ever made a face if we didn't have diapers or formula due to our drinking

[Anonymous No.20471217]

What do I do if my wife can't help herself but eat cookies and drink sugary drinks around the house?

I don't buy any junk food myself but around the holidays or something usually we'll get chocolates and whatnot and not a day goes by when she won't indulge. I can have sweets in the house for weeks before I finally finish them but she eats them all within a couple days. I feel like I have to hide them like she's a child or something and I feel so stupid for it. I guess my secret is I hide junk food from my wife for her own good.

[Anonymous No.20471222]

>>20471203
>I also used to beat my wife if she ever made a face
Did she smarten up and stop complaining or leave like a bitch?

[Anonymous No.20471233]

>>20471222
she was packing her backs one time and I stopped her and told her that I love her and I would never do it again while I kissed and had sex. Seem they get off on lies and deception

[Anonymous No.20471265]

i eat and use food that falls on the floor all the time if its in my own home
even if something falls on the filthy table outside, its getting picked up and eaten

[Anonymous No.20471288]

>>20471061
good question, she's okay with me having a few beers, doesn't say much, the shots of tequila might raise an eyebrow though.

[Anonymous No.20471295]

>>20471187
Good GOD man. What the fuck is wrong with you? wash your goddamn cock.

[Anonymous No.20472786]

>>20471265
i saw my mom accidently drop burger patties into the compost bucket when she was dumping the grease out. she scraped the food scraps off it and put it back into the pan

[Anonymous No.20472804]

>>20470986

>when my wife isn't looking

Anon, she knows you have an alcohol problem. She's in the final stages of preparing to take the kids and go stay at her mothers whilst your're at work. You're going to lose the house in the divorce. she's going to take everything. Now is the time to buy a gun.

[Anonymous No.20472809]

I like to mix various sodas with my beer. Monster Ultra Zero and lager beer go well together.

[Anonymous No.20472811]

>>20472809

Post COD K/D ratio or gtfo

[Anonymous No.20472815]

>>20470986
My alcoholic move after my fiancée pointed out how many drinks id had on a weeknight was to crack a lacroix and pour some vodka in it.
This worked until one time she wanted a sip of it.

[Anonymous No.20472816]

>>20472811
I don't play cod. I just like the energy drink because it was a meme here like 6-7 years ago.
>that first sip of the day

[Anonymous No.20472852]

to me alcohol is associated to weekends, so I don't drink on a regular basis, and it is rare to even drink on weekends for me
to me alcohol is something I take to get drunk, socially, the most I'll do is have a beer or two on the weekend by myself

[Anonymous No.20472859]

you can add salt to food to enhance the flavor. don’t tell anyone!

[Anonymous No.20472888]

>>20472852
I have been drunk every day for like 10 years but I still managed to go overboard last night and I'm currently dying from a hangover. I'm not working today because of weather even though it's not fucking raining and its not going to but I guess that's okay because I truly feel like shit

[Anonymous No.20472904]

I refuse to go grocery shopping or cook if the house is messy. I'm perfectly fine just eating McDonald's for lunch break a few days. Wife got a lot better at keeping the house when she found out idgaf and am satisfied with omad. Either she loses weight and gets semi-attractive again or she gets off her ass and does her job. You can't lose.

[Anonymous No.20472907]

>>20472888
>every day for like 10 years
anon, you probably already know, but that's not going to end well, it's going to fuck up your health big time

[Anonymous No.20472923]

>>20472907
I'm from dirt poor Irish and French immigrant stock everyone in my family lives until 80 years old being a complete piece of shit I just shouldn't have taken 5 shots of vodka and drank 2 monacos in addition to my regular beer regimen. Young people are retarded and think that drinking being unhealthy mean you will die of liver failure at 29 but what it actually means is if you drink a liter of vodka every day you'll die at 55

[Anonymous No.20472966]

Fine wine is cheapest in the ghetto.

[Anonymous No.20472981]

>>20472923
Try taking one of those hangover supplements that contain hidhydromyricitin before going to bed. They work remarkably well.

[Anonymous No.20473082]

>>20472888
>I have to go in at midnight
Well at least I already want to go to sleep

[Anonymous No.20473092]

>>20472923
idk pham, do you think everyone in your family that got to 80 drank every day the same you do?
Idk pham, why do it in the first place? It's most fucking unhealthy behavior phisically and spiritually.

[Anonymous No.20473102]

>>20473092
>idk pham, do you think everyone in your family that got to 80 drank every day the same you do?
Yes and it's not a matter of what I "think"
>why do it in the first place?
Physical addiction

[Anonymous No.20473106]

>>20472966
It's dark people so it's probably malt.

[Anonymous No.20473134]

>>20473102
>Physical addiction
get some self love anon, you'll enjoy buzz after that again, I think it's worth it, you're an alcoholic as fuck, by the manual
c'mon anon, do it for yourself

[Anonymous No.20473159]

>>20471217
Maybe it’s just me but after starting to eat a few dates every day my sugar cravings almost completely disappeared. Alternatively I’m not suggesting food poisoning, but people become hesitant to eat foods that have made them sick (knockoff samoas upset my tummy if I eat too many).

Also it’s not really shameful but my secret is I don’t really get angry except when I’m cooking, but when I’m cooking I swear up a storm (no I’m not a chef/cook for my job).