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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 573 KB, 798x605, BBQ1[1].png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523447 No.7523447[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Can someone upload or link me to the best of cooking with jack highlight video? or post webums? I'm teaching my friend about what I think might be one of the internet's most expertly-crafted trolls

Jack can't really be that bad, can he? He can't, no way.

>> No.7523462

>>7523447
fucking post it fagz (please)

>> No.7523486
File: 196 KB, 1080x1080, 1451603770992.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523486

Essential Ja/ck/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUvYcUbxzYI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHyXstpe_N8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eO6e5k6Vvnc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUMiZKyM6AA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf_W7As6xbk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQOnMVnstfE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ak3uJGf6Bj0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WRC7HXBJpU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fl5T5sw0238

>> No.7523559
File: 153 KB, 1280x720, topcuck.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523559

Is it Ja/ck/ time?

>> No.7523568

>>7523559
yes pls post webms so i dont have to dive through 14 minute videos

>>7523486
>watch the knife review, this should be good
>tries to cut a fucking heat-treated inch thick wooden spoon with a ceramic knife
>chortles derisively when it instantly breaks

I swear to god it's a fucking troll, it has to be a fucking troll

>> No.7523572

If jack is acting he is very consistent and not clever or funny about it.

>> No.7523573

I'd love to see the video of him being shot down by these investors.

>> No.7523581

>>7523486
Why was I hoping he cut his fingers clean off in the knife review?

>> No.7523587
File: 315 KB, 720x404, waala.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523587

>> No.7523593

Who is jack? I'm /newfag/ to /ck/

>> No.7523599
File: 2.77 MB, 480x270, 1457238477004.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523599

>> No.7523603

>>7523593
Jack is an idiot who gets way too much attention. He's awful at everything yet is fairly successful on youtube.

>> No.7523604

>>7523599
why does it make me so mad that he dresses like a big huge little boy

everything about his entire existence infuriates me

>> No.7523610

>>7523593

He is a dorky fat dude that posts bad youtube cooking videos. He has the personality of a wet mop and is not a good enough speaker to do what he is doing.

>> No.7523613

>>7523559

BIG

>> No.7523619

>>7523573

The whole episode was gold, it was a complete fucking disaster.

>Jack was forced to compete with a Texas pitmaster in bbq
>the old texans end up cooking instead of him because he can't even get the grill going and is too busy flirting with soccer moms and shilling his youtube channel
>it's obvious that the judges feel sorry for him and declare him the winner
>Jack tried to sell his sauce company for something like 300 thousand or was it 3 million can't remember but it was a ridiculous number
>they ask him about revenue and how many stores sell his sauces
>less than a hundred walmarts actually sell his sauce
>they call his sauce jelly
>they offer him 30,000 for the sauces or offer to take over his jewtube channel
>jack refuses and starts crying
>they pretend to feel sorry for him
>Jack gets nicknamed Jack Scalfatty

Those old texans actually seemed pretty cool guys.

>> No.7523637

>>7523610
>He is a dorky fat dude that posts bad youtube cooking videos

No man. He posts videos giving instructions that can even be dangerous to follow. Have you watched the way this guy uses knifes or tells you to cook chicken for X amount of time knowing that it will not be cooked, but still tells you that it's ok to eat it? Sorry but no.

The only good thing about it is that you have to be really ignorant to follow his advice, so I guess the people that would follow his advice lives on coupons and can't barelly afford the shit he recommends and for sure can not buy his sauces or seasonings.

>> No.7523662

>>7523604
I bet Tammy has to make him tendies.
REEEEEEEEEEEEE

>> No.7523671

>>7523619
Damn, I want to see it bad now. I can't find it anywhere.

>> No.7523673

>>7523447
https://youtu.be/hpPqguNvfEQ

I assume someone from /ck/ made this

>> No.7523676

>>7523637
We should try and get his channel flagged as a public health hazard.

>> No.7523678

Hahaha how did I miss this gold?
https://vid me/uKDR/jack-scalfani-comments-on-choking-son-mean-youtu

>> No.7523683

>>7523678
>choke your son out for smoking weed

Why?

>> No.7523693

>>7523637
I can't afford to buy beer but I do it anyway.

Real fans -- true fans -- of Jack Scalfani buy his products. His show is great but it only exists to market his sauces (The Best BBQ.Hot BBQ/Terriyaki Sauce You'll Ever Taste) and seasonings.

Jack's family and family values are what define him, but what motivates him is communication. Fuck whatever some fag poster said a couple lines up -- Jack is a master communicator. He was a DJ for decades. What you guys see as incompetence is actually a way for him to engage his audience (ie. come in close, u jelly? or ooohhh I fugged up, how would you do it??). He does it so that Jackboys develop a personal relationship with him and he does it damn good. Whether selling sauce, engaging his audience or just spreading the gospel ("the good news" for any ck heathens, jk I don't want this to devolve into theological squabbling) Jack is an exemplar man of compassion and unorthodox competency.

I like these threads for the WebMs and people's reactions but there is a degree of revile you cucks have for him that comes completely out of left field.

>> No.7523699

>>7523693
If I was ever in prison with Jack, I'd have his back.

>> No.7523703

>>7523693
>9 years on youtube, less than 250k subs

Real successful

>> No.7523727

>>7523673
BIG GUY

>> No.7523736

>>7523673
What's with the massive tongue tho? It's like he was a molecule away from being born with downs syndrom.

>> No.7523740

>>7523703
How many smiles and laughs have their been?
How much learning and compassion?

You can point to better cooks, I get it, but not everyone on youtube is a subscription hound. Success is not defined by a number, and furthermore a small dedicated audience is almost always favored over a large disinterested audience by true communicators.

That being said, the number is not great so if you enjoy his dishes or just like seeing him 2+ times a week let your friends know about the king. Sharing is caring, and he's done his share of that in his time.

>> No.7523741

>>7523673
keking. I miss ja/ck/posting desu

>> No.7523742

>>7523673
>here we go before every bite

The guy has obvious mother issues. Was he abandoned by his mother? It's like he is feeding himself in a third-person manner.

>> No.7523745

>>7523742
>he has mother issues

He's Italian-American

>> No.7523748

>>7523673
>here we go
>here we go
>alright here we go
>here we go
>ya ready here we go
>here we go
>here we go
>alright here we go
>here we go
>here we go
>here we go
>ya ready here we go
>here we go
>here we go

>> No.7523750

>>7523740
>defending jack seriously

the persona is a troll. nobody would dress like that and have a fucking goatee on purpose.

>> No.7523757

>>7523745
No this is something deeper than your average latin roots. He is either punishing or praising himself before eating, in a very expressive way.

I'd need to watch the video a couple times again to make sure, but it's too disgusting to watch a pug faced fat fuck stuffing his face with lard.

>> No.7523759

>>7523750
haha, well it is a pretty dedicated Kaufman routine if it just an act. My guess is he's just not like most people you've met, for better or worse.

>> No.7523761

>>7523587
that looks suspiciously like maggots and rotting goat meat

>> No.7523762

>>7523759
Well he does have a statistically uncommonly low IQ

>> No.7523764

>>7523740
>Success is not defined by a number

It literally is.

>> No.7523770

>>7523673
haha, makes me hungry but it's late and I don't want to adopt Jack's figure (cause he's fat as hell)

>>7523762
maybe, maybe not, I think a lot of his apparent idiocy is a put on, but I suppose I could be giving the man undue credit

>>7523764
for you

>> No.7523773
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7523773

>>7523693
>Real fans -- true fans -- of Jack Scalfani buy his products.
yes yes good buy more shit you stupid fucking moron holy fuck you're such a fucking idiot buy more

>> No.7523774

>>7523770
Definitely giving him too much credit. Why assume deceit and acting when simple stupidity would suffice?

>> No.7523782
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7523782

>>7523486
oh my fucking GOD. I just watched that pizza review shitfest. I'm no big fan of chain pizza but I swear to god I want to kill this man after watching that. I've endured lots of ja/ck/ fuck ups and silently shook my head, that was over the line. I'm madder than I've ever been. He didn't even taste any of them, I learned nothing. Just some fat fuck with an axe to grind because his bullshit tier pizza wasn't perfect and didn't have two pounds of cheese on top. And you know he happily gobbled them all up as soon as the camera stopped rolling. I wish he'd have choked on them.

>durrr nobody in california knows how to make a pizza
>lets just take a look at our local pizza, shall we?
>reviews 3 huge multinational chain brands

Yea jack, if you think California pizza is bad you should come to Texas. I have a freezer full of Totino's party time pizzas from Walmart and they don't even have any real cheese on them and they don't even use pepperoni slices here, its little cubes. Texans sure are shit at making pizza.

>> No.7523790

>>7523774
I used to listen to a lot of talk radio (which Jack used to work in) and it is not possible for hosts to be as retarded as they unintentionally. Feigned helplessness is a trick of the trade so to speak and I think Jack has applied it to youtube to make passive viewing an interaction and cement his core audience.

>> No.7523799

>>7523790
Jack was just a DJ for some shitty country station, he's not Andy Kaufman. He is just a stupid guy.

>> No.7523816
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7523816

>when your taco roleplays as a faucet

>> No.7523818
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7523818

Am I the only one here that's legit jealous of Jack's stupidity? I wish I could bumble about like him without any self awareness at all. He's completely retarded but seems so happy and clueless. If ignorance is bliss Jack is the happiest man alive. Must be nice.

>> No.7523843

>>7523818
>you ma ma make me happee

>> No.7523844
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7523844

>>7523486
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHyXstpe_N8
>asking for your money back because of a bubble

>> No.7523848

>>7523818
Will you still be jealous when his body continues to fail and he has a foot amputated? Ignorance has a price eventually

>> No.7523852
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>> No.7523859
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7523859

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igHTDpOOOY4&feature=youtu.be&t=2m18s

>> No.7523864
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>> No.7523870
File: 202 KB, 690x1266, tammy-cucked.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523870

>> No.7523873
File: 2.39 MB, 640x480, honing-knife-skills-for-palestine.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523873

>> No.7523874

>>7523870
>spray tan, bleached teeth, 90 lbs overweight
man has walked this Earth too long

>> No.7523877
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7523877

>> No.7523881
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>> No.7523882

>>7523870

Everytime I see that fat cow I want to fuck it... what the fuck is wrong with me?

>> No.7523886
File: 139 KB, 1414x794, jack-films-a-sex-tape.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523886

>> No.7523888

>>7523818
No, I'd rather be dead. I'm completely content being somewhat above average intelligence, self aware, lonely and miserable.

>> No.7523891
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7523891

>> No.7523895

>>7523447
Found one:

http://www.watchseries.li/link/vodlocker.com/4996317


This show is just insufferable.

>> No.7523897
File: 496 KB, 852x480, jack-learns-physics.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523897

>> No.7523898

>>7523882
>what the fuck is wrong with me?
you sexually identify as jack. What you really meant to say is that you want to see other men fuck it. I'm sorry to have been the one to tell you this you poor poor anon

>> No.7523902
File: 2.74 MB, 690x450, tammyattack69.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523902

>>7523882
one of us

>> No.7523905
File: 2.71 MB, 844x446, jack-learns-physics.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523905

>>7523897
Oop that's not him learning about physics..

>> No.7523907

>>7523882
I would. She'd do anal too.

>all fat chicks will take it up the ass
>low self esteem and it's painless, they take big shits

>> No.7523912
File: 2.78 MB, 640x360, cakesque.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523912

>> No.7523914

>>7523882
>>7523907

Kill yourselves, Ja/ck/-kin

>> No.7523915

>>7523891
What's so hard about putting on the lid securely and placing it in correctly?

>> No.7523917
File: 2.17 MB, 480x270, 1455493274429.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523917

>> No.7523919

>>7523573
>>7523671

http://allmyvideos.net/d2ragai8t5dz

this is the whole video with Jack

>> No.7523920

>>7523915
It was hot coffee which you shouldn't put in a ninja since it's not vented

>> No.7523922
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7523922

>> No.7523925
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7523925

Does Ja/ck/ know that he's a /ck/ meme?

>> No.7523929
File: 1.45 MB, 756x384, a-big-healthy-one.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523929

>> No.7523931

>>7523925
>The fucking delayed response when the hot mixture hits his hand

Just how fat is he?

>> No.7523933

>>7523848
that jack tries it episode where he checks his blood sugar before and after drinking diet soda to see if it will make his numbers rise... classic Jack

>> No.7523935

>>7523929
Why does this faggot have a shun?

>> No.7523936
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>> No.7523941
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>> No.7523945

>>7523844
>Everything moves?? ;)

Yeah you fat fuck, it does. You would know that if you ever fucking worked at a restaurant in your entire life. I can't handle this fucking retard, I couldn't last more than a minute. God help the pizza chains around this zombie blob

>> No.7523947
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7523947

>> No.7523953
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7523953

>>7523886
Holy shit! I remember typing that post a while ago. Thanks for saving it anon.

>> No.7523954

>>7523905

Does that much oil even come in a single container?

>> No.7523956
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>> No.7523957
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>> No.7523961

>>7523914
suck me off, girl

>> No.7523968
File: 1.13 MB, 1277x719, this-was-a-mistake.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523968

Hope none of you are coffee fags.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jMCSOH87hU

>> No.7523971

>>7523486
>"A nice healthy dose of sour cream"

I know this is a figure of speech but after 2 1/2 lbs of cheese, the word healthy triggered me.

>> No.7523973
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>> No.7523982
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>> No.7523986

>>7523968
such an HT patrician

>> No.7523990
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7523990

>> No.7523996

>>7523486
Christ almighty what he is doing in that pizza review?

That's rape in some states

>> No.7523998

>>7523486
I'd eat that enchilada if there wasn't a truckload of cheese tbqh.

>> No.7523999
File: 2.76 MB, 1280x720, 1454111783279.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7523999

>> No.7524011

https://youtu.be/ItcgIIGeFnc?t=454

Surprised this hasn't been posted yet

>> No.7524017

>>7523581
he was trying his hardest

>> No.7524035

>>7523673
damn so weird to see Ja/ck younger, he is fucking fat as shit now.

>> No.7524039

>>7523486
>cuts by pulling the knife towards him instead of pushing
i dont know why this triggers me as much as it does

>> No.7524053

>>7523816
>cup of grease comes out

there is a reason dude looks like he ate a everlasting gobstopper an hour ago.

>> No.7524058
File: 134 KB, 311x355, 1422413055160.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7524058

>>7524011
Isn't uncooked pork potentially lethal?

>> No.7524065

>>7524058
Jack probably has about 300 different undiscovered species of parasites that have a symbiotic relationship with him at this point

>> No.7524078

>>7523929
he never ceases to amaze

>> No.7524082

>>7523957
lmao

>> No.7524086

i don't think anyone could convincingly pretend to be as incompetent as jack actually is

it's even more astounding considering jack went out of his way to start a youtube cooking channel. he's not some dude who hates cooking and is comically bad at it. he considers himself someone to watch and learn from.

>> No.7524088

What's up with the theme song for Jack On the Go? It's so obnoxious but it's always stuck in my head.

>> No.7524223

>>7524088
BLEEBLEEBLEEBLEE OOOOO-OOH by John Williams

>> No.7524238

>>7524065
Imagine what the coroner will see in that festering gut of his underneath that thick, rotting layer of fat

>> No.7524267

>>7524086
Jack doesn't think he is good at cooking, he has openly admitted his channel was created to sell his BBQ sauce. He owns the sauce company because a partner bailed out of a deal with him and left him with it before launch. Cooking with Jack is how he is making lemonade out of some lemons life gave him.

>> No.7524269

>>7524267
Didn't his son say that Jack rarely cooks outside his show?

>> No.7524278

>>7524269
yeah there's a couple second video clip of that somewhere. It's not wholly damning, given that it is his son saying it while getting pestered by trolls, but it's probably true given how fat his family is.

I don't have any real proof but a lot of Jack's "friends" are usually fellow business owners, so in addition to his channel being a prolonged ad he seems to be giving other people commercial exposure as well. For profit, payola, or just goodwill I can't tell, but it rustles my jimmies when I see it.

>> No.7524283
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>> No.7524287

>>7523982
He'd give Joey a run for his money, weight/sizewise.

>> No.7524291

>>7524058
It used to be really bad because they used to fed dead pigs to pigs and that just kept perpetuating the food born diseases for pork but then they stopped that and now its not really that bad.

>> No.7524295
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7524295

>>7524283
if you're going to make a beer you might as well bottle it with a twist off

>> No.7524301

>>7523891
That yellow thing in the coffee isn't butter, r-right?

>> No.7524302
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>> No.7524308
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7524308

>>7523905
>puts it in cold oil

>> No.7524314

>>7524301
It is butter

>> No.7524328
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7524328

>>7524314

>> No.7524364

>>7523982
wow, his older son was able to take a joint or bong or vaporizer out of his mouth for 30 seconds to take this picture? color me shocked..