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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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[ERROR] No.7768069 [Reply] [Original]

Let's have your worst

>> No.7768071

haha i've never seen this before

>> No.7768075

one more

>> No.7768077

>>7768069
FOOD REKT !!!!

>> No.7768089

>>7768069

fuck, I thought she was going to make a bloomin onion.

>> No.7768096

How the blade came close to her thumb the first time.

>> No.7768102

>>7768096
>came close
She actually cut herself if you watch. Then carried on without washing her hands

>> No.7768114

>>7768069
Is she cutting that with a butter knife?
Also that fucking camera work. Jesus christ.

>> No.7768247

>>7768069
You idiots trash Marie but do you even realize how intricate and difficult it is to pull off a star cut on an onion like that? She's clearly been to some form of culinary school unlike the VAST majority of the mouthbreathers on here.

>> No.7768255

>>7768247
>some form of culinary
one that teaches fucking shocking grip

>> No.7768272

>>7768069

>> No.7768284

>>7768272
hmmmm american cuisine, shit as always

>> No.7768297

>>7768069

>> No.7768325

>>7768069

>> No.7768942

>>7768069
Did she suffer a stroke or nervous breakdown maybe? I swear, can see chunks of skin missing from her fingers.

>> No.7768953

>>7768284
I wouldn't call opening up cans and using prepackaged garbage and forming a pig slop American cuisine. This is more like a fat fuck needing to meet his 6,000calorie a day diet, so of course a fat lazy fuck is just going to open cans and other processed crap together and load it with fat from mayo, cheese and whatever else that's cheap and eat the pig slop.

>> No.7768960

>>7768272
Jack really is a piece of shit

>> No.7768962

>>7768297
can he do anything right

>> No.7768976

>>7768960
The biggest smelliest piece of shit ever.
>>7768962
The guy is a fuckin moron.

>> No.7768994

>>7768272
I've sadly waited for this opportunity to ask for a "best of" jack post. Just requesting YouTube links to some of his worst abominations. Anything on par with aunt merna's party salad.

>> No.7769145

>>7768272

>> No.7769324

>>7768096
>>7768102

It looks like a butter knife...

>> No.7769382

>>7768069
well there go my fingers

>> No.7769424

>>7768297
That's not how you make jenkem.

>> No.7770578

>>7768297
>>7768962
>>7768976
what is his youtube channel?

>> No.7770593

>>7768069
Mods please move this thread to /wsg/ in accordance with the rules.
Additionally OP, requests for media should be posted in /wsr/.
Thanks.

>> No.7770635

>>7768069
EZ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INZ_hG1lyYU

>> No.7770652
File: 2.87 MB, 640x360, 1445286484086.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7770652

HARDMODE

>> No.7770697

>>7770652
HOLY FUCK

>> No.7770712

>>7770652
What the fuck, sauce!

>> No.7770717

>>7770712
>>7770697
have you guys really never seen that
how long have you been here

>> No.7770718

>>7770697
>>7770712
newfag alert

>> No.7770735

>>7770717
a really long time actually
never bothered to comment tho

>> No.7771850

>>7770652
that's not real

>> No.7771861
File: 12 KB, 296x296, 1418924863491.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7771861

>>7770635

>> No.7771873

>>7768994
>>>/wsr/

>> No.7771896

>>7770652
youtube link by chance?

>> No.7771916

>>7770652
more horrifying to me was when they had no idea how to open a can

>> No.7771928
File: 2.89 MB, 640x352, cans-are-hard.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7771928

>>7771916
You mean like this?

>> No.7771931

>>7771850
>>7771896
>>7770712
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Restaurant_(UK_TV_series)

>> No.7771935

>>7770717
>>7770718
To be fair, that video has only been posted on /ck/ since Monday, 19 October 2015 at 21:29 GMT. Give or take a minute or two.

>> No.7771952

>>7768994
/v/ here, we had E3 snack thread that turned into a BBQ thread that turned into a Jack thread
I came here for more Jack

>> No.7771977

>>7771931

What a stupid concept for a show

>> No.7771985

>>7770652
I was pretty sure a fingertip was coming off at :25

>> No.7772013

>>7771952
link to the /v/ jack thread? I want to see how they react to his buffoonery and the fact that he is a gaymer

>> No.7772016

>>7772013
>>>/v/340705869

>> No.7772019
File: 1.78 MB, 250x187, nomaam.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7772019

>>7771928
were those women epic trolls? i can't believe anyone is that stupid and still possesses all their fingers.

>> No.7772074

>>7768297
That's one of those shitty sugar jars from target. They dont seal for shit. (obviously)

>> No.7772082
File: 631 KB, 374x368, Corn.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7772082

>> No.7772122

>>7771977
Television is shit

>> No.7772796

>>7772082
Forget the fucking hair, that bitch is lucky she didn't lose any teeth.

>> No.7773230
File: 33 KB, 598x614, 1443040690363.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773230

>>7772082
s-sauce?

>> No.7773238

>>7772082
o fuk
surprised there was no blood

>> No.7773243
File: 18 KB, 560x375, lel.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773243

>>7772082

>> No.7773455

>>7771928
Nobody that stupid deserves to use a Wursthoff.

>> No.7773462

>>7772082
that looks like it came off way too clean. it looks perfectly shaved off.
fake/staged?

>> No.7773573
File: 358 KB, 500x357, 1465507168160-1.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773573

>>7772082
fake or not this is great

>> No.7773575

>>7770593
thumbs down

>> No.7773586

>>7773462

Knowing how much Chinese girls care about their hair, it's highly unlikely.

Long, black, silky hair is one of the most important criteria for beauty.

>> No.7773612

>>7772019
I'm pretty sure they haven't cooked anything in their lives, anon.

>> No.7773627
File: 2.77 MB, 480x270, no.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773627

>>7772013
Ja/ck/ threads are banned here now because mods detest anything remotely fun, and only approve of fast food threads.

>> No.7773629
File: 443 KB, 1280x720, im-in-the-mood-for-oil-burns.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773629

>> No.7773630
File: 74 KB, 540x960, lasagna-maybe.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773630

>> No.7773632

>>7773629
It's almost like you're supposed to lay the meat down AWAY from you for a reason or something.

>> No.7773633
File: 2.44 MB, 960x720, piggly wiggly.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773633

>>7773462
It's part of some forced attempt at a viral video, there's a jump cut, the moment her hair gets caught, if you watch it frame by frame in the 4th second you'll see her hair move back, off of the drill, before moving forward to get yanked off. Also the hair clump that's yanked out is fucking brown.

I'm sure that's happened to some stupid fucker who tried to do it in real life though.

Can't find the video on youtube but it was just someone trying to get some ad money.

Not exactly rekt, but this pig fucking destroys that cookie.

>> No.7773640
File: 101 KB, 709x400, 1457753645740.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7773640

>> No.7773656

>>7773629
>>7773627
Daily reminder that this low IQ asshole can vote

>> No.7773850

>>7773462
>>7773633
it is real, here is the after video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BttJ3AGxvZk

>> No.7773867

>>7773633
Why is this pig in a bed?

>> No.7773869

>>7773867

Because it's comfortable....

>> No.7773876

>>7773867
Why aren't you?

>> No.7773884

>>7773629
surely you can get tongs from a dollar store or something

>> No.7773930

>>7773627
Same here.

>> No.7774104

>>7770578
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P02xDmlgESY

>> No.7774106

>>7773640
Ah, the 60s...

>> No.7774110

>>7770652
>>7771928
These are sad as shit actually, i mean those kitchen utensils.

>> No.7774139
File: 17 KB, 375x330, 1426604379727.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774139

>>7768272
> vinegar out of no where

>> No.7774143

>>7773629
oil isnt hot enough to burn heh

>> No.7774169

>>7768272
why does he flick the fat chunk away?

>> No.7774185
File: 2.81 MB, 640x360, 1451312091764.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774185

>> No.7774190
File: 2.81 MB, 420x420, Hasselback Steak.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774190

It makes me happy when my Ja/ck/ webms get reposted by other people.

Also, reddit upvoted this monstrosity.

>> No.7774197
File: 1.55 MB, 940x529, ThenHeWaddledAwayWaddleWaddle.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774197

>>7774190
I've got nothing to do for like 4 hours, so I'll take any /ck/ webm requests until E3 starts and I can find out what games I'm going to be lied to about this year.

>> No.7774203

>>7774185

Every fucking time.

A normal person can see this is nowhere near cooked, that normal person would have put it back, waited for it to be cooked while deleting the first footage instead of... carrying on like this is normal and uploading it...

A normal person would have done that. Let that sink in for a minute.

>> No.7774209

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXVvfU0N8xM

>> No.7774316

>>7774185
>so moist!

this man is so fucking digusting

>> No.7774322

>>7774047
Full English is shit-tier without decent sausages and bacon, and they look like utter garbage

>> No.7774327
File: 2.80 MB, 640x360, JackMayoCake.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774327

>>7774316
What about the time he made a cake with mayonnaise

>> No.7774331
File: 2.63 MB, 640x360, JackFrosting.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774331

>>7774327
Bonus failure

>> No.7774341

who is Jack

>> No.7774345

>>7774341

some weird show. they throw a mongoloid into a kitchen and film how he plays with raw meat.

>> No.7774352
File: 2.74 MB, 640x360, JackChicken.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774352

>>7774341
He is a man who thinks he can cook.

But he cannot.

>> No.7774357

>>7774352
but...but that's DANGEROUSLY undercooked, like the pork...is it a joke channel?

>> No.7774363

>>7774331

Good lord, it looks like shit. Like literal human feces.

>> No.7774365

Does /ck/ like Simply Sara?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GqHESR3tcU

>> No.7774370
File: 2.47 MB, 640x360, bison-burger.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774370

>>7774357

you don't like juicy meat?

>> No.7774373
File: 1.78 MB, 640x360, JackBison2.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774373

>>7774357
No, he's just convinced that he's some down to earth everyman cutting through the pretentious liberal hipster recipes that use things like fresh ingredients and herbs.

>> No.7774375

>>7774370
It would take effort to cook something that shittily, he would've had to cook it for like a minute each side or something

>> No.7774387

thanks /ck/ i feel better about my cooking

>> No.7774395

>>7774190
Can anyone confirm that its a bad idea to cutthe meat before cooking it? It seems like you would loose a lot of moisture.

>> No.7774397

>>7774352
MMMMMMM, I just love it when my chicken is severely under cooked.

>> No.7774414

>>7774395
Yeah, that's a no no. It isn't as bad as cutting it WHILE it's cooking but it should be avoided

>> No.7774425

>>7774370
>>7774373
why would anyone make a bison burger

why is the tomato so thick

why does the cheese and bun look so shit

>> No.7774426

>>7773629

the oil is clearly quite cold

>> No.7774430

>>7774104

>lemon curd chicken

what the actual fuck

how fucking sweet must that shit be

>> No.7774433

>>7774185
thiss makes me so mad.

>> No.7774434

>>7774395

more surface area = more moisture loss but at the end of the day it's more about the temperature you take it to than anything like that. i mean everyone likes ground beef right

>> No.7774436

>>7774363

no it doesn't

why does /ck/ have such a crappy imagination that every time they want to criticise someone they find something brown and say it looks like poo

>> No.7774439

>>7774331
hahahahahahahahahahaha

>> No.7774441

>>7774185
>meat should be falling apart practically by itself

Yeah, no.

>> No.7774444

>>7774190
>cuts it
>ultra well done

>> No.7774446

>>7774197
Can you do some Bruno Albouze? He can actually cook.

https://www.youtube.com/user/BrunoAlbouze

>> No.7774453

>>7774446
Sure, if you give me a specific thing from a video you want.

>> No.7774461

link to that filipino girl making carbonara?

>> No.7774466

>>7774190
those fucking tasty videos are terrible

there's one where they cut chicken for a salad and it's LITERALLY raw on the inside and they still plate it

>> No.7774470

>>7773640
Looks like your average pate.

>> No.7774472
File: 745 KB, 1500x1001, main_1500 (2).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774472

>>7774190
>reddit
Expecting else anything from lowest common denominator: the website

>> No.7774481
File: 38 KB, 495x528, 1452713614125.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774481

>>7774461
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-PKO2FrdPY
:(

>> No.7774485

>>7774466
Nice tripdoubledubs.

They really are fucking awful. If it's a savoury recipe it's just excessive cheese and bacon to cater to the reddit meme crowd, and if it's a dessert then it's nothing but sweet stacked on sweet stacked on sweet. With bacon too, probably.

>> No.7774487

>>7774466

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0OY-Exwia4

this one? it looks completely safe

>> No.7774488

>>7774430
"Sweet as candy", like he said.

>> No.7774500

>>7774487
yes thats it

Im glad you knew which one it was

>> No.7774517
File: 2.32 MB, 1080x1080, TASTY RAW CHICKEN.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774517

>> No.7774523

>>7774500
You might just be used to overcooked chicken

>> No.7774533

>>7774523
You can tell that the core is undercooked and that the chicken didn't firm up in the slightest bit between flipping and taking it out. I could tell before he even started cutting it.

>> No.7774534

>>7773640
That's fucking weird but not...
>the shrimp
Oh my fucking god....

>> No.7774540

>>7774533
>>7774500

it's just a tiny bit translucent. it's definitely perfectly safe, whatever you think about how it tastes is up to you but i quite like it like that.

>> No.7774544

>>7773633
sleep tight porker

>> No.7774545

>>7774523

>If it's not pink and translucent in the middle then it's overcooked

I also remember seeing some comment on the video saying the chicken keeps cooking when u take it off the heat, slice and put into the salad. Fucking mental.

>>7774540

So pretty much one day you undercooked a chicken and didn't die from eating it.

>> No.7774547

>>7774540
I wouldn't say "perfectly safe". You don't want to kill just 90% of the bacteria and call it a day. Or maybe call it a day, but don't call it safe.

>> No.7774559

>>7770652
the tool-making animal, they said

>> No.7774580

>>7774559
Clearly referring to the only gender that matters.

>> No.7774604

>>7774545

>So pretty much one day you undercooked a chicken and didn't die from eating it.

no, this isn't anecdotal, this is based on knowing how meat contamination and pasteurisation works.

>>7774547

you're killing much more than 90% of the bacteria if you sear the outside hard. pan frying is one of the safest ways of cooking meat. there is more danger in mixing it with the vegetables in the pan than there is in leaving the centre translucent.

>> No.7774611

>>7774517
Fat fuck detection, that looks good.

>> No.7774620

>>7774185
Doesn't he then proceed to say the claws are a bad product that doesn't work? I have some and they're great, assuming you are shredding fully cooked meat.

>> No.7774624

>>7774481
I almost puked what the fuck

>> No.7774636
File: 15 KB, 260x260, bombs internally.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7774636

>>7774481
look at how fucking dirty and disgusting that fucking stove top is jfc, only some fucking flip monkey would fucking think of this fucking abomination
>hotdogs
>kraft fucking cheese
someone please fucking put me out of my misery

>> No.7774779

>>7774517
The chicken looks just fine.

>> No.7774878

>>7770718

Please go back to /b with that newfag shit. No one gives a shit how long you've been here.

>> No.7774893

>>7774472
>art

>> No.7774975

>>7774395

It's as bad as those retards who use a fork to turn a steak.

>> No.7775101
File: 2.48 MB, 1349x1199, The smuggest cat.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7775101

>>7774481
Jesus Christ

>mfw seeing the husbands grimace and knowing I'll never have to eat that trash

>> No.7775153

>>7775101
It's like he's being held at gunpoint

>> No.7775201

>>7774517
But that chicken looks just fine.

>> No.7775555

>>7774331
>That hand gesture at the end.
"Wala!"

>> No.7775573

here for the american insults am I late or no?

>> No.7775578

>>7775573
I'm still here if you wanna take a jab

>> No.7775585

>>7774517
>
the chicken's fine
the guy who makes those has awful, awful technique, but the chicken is fine

>> No.7775589

>>7770593
omfg people are breaking the roles on a website that in no way affect anyone. this shit can't be going down, not on my watch!

>> No.7775590
File: 149 KB, 700x700, 1462675198526.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7775590

>>7775101
I want to laugh but he has a wife who cares about him and I haven't touched a girl in years.

>> No.7775614

>>7774357
to be fair, in the video he does realise its undercooked.

he recommends blasting it in the microwave to solve that problem.

>> No.7775628

>>7770652

Oh my sweetlord, I think they're retarded

>> No.7775633

>>7774373
HE DOESNT FUCKING BLINK

CRAZY EYES

>> No.7775647

>>7770652

where can I watch this online

>> No.7775664
File: 2.44 MB, 640x282, JacksBedroomEyes.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7775664

>>7775633
Sensual eyes...

>> No.7775705

>>7775647
i remember watching it online

>> No.7775726

>>7775614
What is 're-recordong the video' instead of looking like an idiot on youtube

Oh wait this guy uses 2 liters of mayonaise for 'salads' nevermind.

>> No.7775764

>>7775664
fucking christ thats terrifying

>> No.7775766

>>7774580
Hijras?

>> No.7775767
File: 326 KB, 1200x1600, whoopsie.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7775767

>>7772019

>> No.7775777

>>7775664
Can you make Henry Phillips from Henrys Kitchen webms?

>> No.7775837

>>7773867
ur mum sleeps too m8

>> No.7775848

>>7774331
Jesus fucking christ.
I don't think of myself as a very prolific or great cooker but even I know that's a bad idea.
What in the fuck is wrong with this guy. shit

>> No.7775858

>>7774481
She lives in Oman.

>> No.7775880

I have to thank whoever was posting the Jack videos. I went from being very hungry to no appetite, which is good since I ate enough today. Thank you.

>> No.7775882

>>7774425
>why would anyone make a bison burger
Bison's good, mang.

>> No.7775884

>>7774470
It's aspic, you aspie.

>> No.7775903

>>7770635

Steps:

1. Don't remove root. (Correct)
2. Remove paper. (Correct)
3. Set onion on wobbling root and proceed to make overly difficult cuts. Bonus points for holding your thumb and forefinger in the cutting range.
4. Sharp knives don't cause cellular damage! We're literally cutting it with Japanese magic right now.
5. Proceed to barely push your knife into the onion in the other direction 4 times (but only actually cut it three times).
6. Instead of just cutting the onion in half before beginning so you have a flat surface, stab a fork into the root and 'dice' your onion by hacking off large, uneven slices caused by your wobbly, uneven onion.
7. Leave a large hunk of uncut onion on the end of your folk.

Wa la!

>> No.7775913

>>7774104

>make cooking show
>not enough time to buy fresh herbs due to cooking show

>> No.7775916

>>7774104

He didn't... Take his rings off. That is absolutely disgusting.

This man shouldn't be allowed within five miles of a motherfucking chicken.

>> No.7775949

>>7770652
I don't know what I'd do if I only had those utensils, either. I take them outside and whack them with a hammer.

>> No.7775951

>>7774365
I like her. Her videos have a nice vibe to it and her voice itself is an attraction.

>you will never worship sara from her toes to her blubbery tits

>> No.7775952

>>7774425
I had a buffalo burger when I was a teenager, and it was delicious, but that idiot deserves a serious case of brucellosis for eating it like that.

>> No.7775960

>>7774197
'Til the very next day

>> No.7775963

>>7774365

She began as the first of the shitty youtube cooks.

But, she seems like such a sweet and kind person that /ck/ fell in love with her. Pretty sure a large majority of us eat this shit up.

>> No.7775986

>>7774523
The top two pieces of chicken after being added to the salad are definitely undercooked

>> No.7776122

>>7774425
>why would anyone make a bison burger
because it's good meat

>> No.7776140

>>7776122
>because it's good meat
So... you use a good piece of meat to make a burger? thats the best idea that you can have?

>> No.7776186

>>7774327

That's a real thing mang, Portillo's restaurant makes their chocolate cake with mayo.

>> No.7776241

>>7774104
Holy shit he actually cooked it properly.

>> No.7776250

>>7776186
yeah, it sounds gross, but really its not that bad, depending on what mayo you buy/make. Mayo really is just eggs oil salt and a touch of acid.

>> No.7776255

>>7776140
bison tastes good, therefore you make food out of it
thats the basis of most culinary inventions

>> No.7776271

>>7776255
yes, but if you can get a piece of meat like that you could think a better way to cook it than a fucking burger man...

>> No.7776331

>>7776255
>>7776271
>>7776140
>>7776122
I'd start by cooking my burger correctly and using ripe tomatoes when making a burger before considering moving on to more complex recipes, to begin with.

>> No.7776364

>>7774878
>/b
>No one gives a shit how long you've been here.
Newfag leave.

>> No.7776407

>>7774185
Anybody got the link for this video?

>> No.7776420

>>7776140
m8, bison isn't a domesticated animal. Virtually every single cut of meat is much more tough than its equivalent on a cow plus it's very lean so there's little fat to render - you pretty much have to either cook it low and slow or tenderize the hell out of it one way or another to get a texture comparable to lean beef. As there really isn't a market for expensive cuts of red meat that have to be slow-cooked for pretty much an entire day, most of the meat is ground into hamburger and you get the excellent flavor without its unfortunate durability plus the versatility of ground meat on top of that.

Honestly, bison is only about a dollar more per pound than 93/7 at this point. If I ever need ground lean red meat then I just go for that instead or elk if I'm feel like splurging. Elk's my favorite but it's $8/lb.

>> No.7776466

>>7773640
This actually is god damn good!

>> No.7776609

>>7771928
To be fair when I was out in a place where I had nothing but a shitty knife and a spoon, that was about the same way I opened my can of meat pate.

>> No.7776610

>>7773867
Better in a bed than in a blanket.

>> No.7776617

>>7774327
>the entire point of mayonnaise, despite how gross the idea is, is to replace eggs and oil
>still adds eggs

>> No.7776678

>>7770593
>Mods please move this thread to /wsg/ in accordance with the rules.Additionally OP, requests for media should be posted in /wsr/.

3rd post says food rekt

>> No.7776702

>>7776407
https://youtu.be/ItcgIIGeFnc?t=458

>> No.7776745

>>7776702
I will watch this man's videos until he dies. They're the most fascinating things on youtube. To think that someone that fucking retarded actually exists is phenomenally compelling.

>> No.7776765

>>7774487
The three topmost pieces (the thickest part of the breast) are pink in the middle. Seriously undercooked though probably safe if fresh and handled properly.

>> No.7776785

>>7775590
>cares about him

nope

>> No.7776786

>>7773633
Man, even a pig eats in a less disgusting way than Jack.

>> No.7776821

>>7775767
FIRMLY GRASP IT

>> No.7776824

>>7775664
u gon get raepd

>> No.7776829

>>7775590
If she cared, she'd have the fucking decency to learn how to cook

>> No.7776835

>>7775555

its ''voila''

>> No.7776837

>>7776835
it's voilà, actually

>> No.7776841

>>7776609
Sure, if you're out in the middle of nowhere it's acceptable to bash the tin with a rock if that's what you've got to do.

Those two are in a fully equipped professional development kitchen, though. There are tin openers.

>> No.7776847

>>7776835
wew lad

>> No.7776882

>>7775882
>>7775952
>>7776122

but why ruin it by making a fucking burger out of it. Stupid muricans i hate you so much why do you have such shit culinary culture

>> No.7776892

>>7776882
>Stop liking what I don't like!
>You should only do things I like in a sophisticated manner, like a sophistic person like myself would do, in a sophisticated way. Because I'm so sophisticated.

Okay.

>> No.7776894

>>7776892
i bet you fart at the table

>> No.7776918

>>7776837
faggot here in the USA it's wala. Not that faggy french shit.

>> No.7776953

>>7776918
kill yourself

>> No.7776982

>>7776918

No, that's just you silly fags who decide to follow the 4chan meme like so many autistic sheep.

>> No.7777006

>>7776982
>autistic sheep
What's the point of shitposting if you aren't going to meme? Take the stick out of your ass.

>> No.7777010

>>7777006
Because I'm stating an honest opinion rather than shitposting.

Meming is silly, thus I refuse to do it.

Is that so hard to understand?

>> No.7777014

>>7774365
just a fruit salad, not bad... Now the macaroni salad however

>> No.7777022

>>7777010
>rather than shitposting.
We're all here to shitpost, including you.

>> No.7777049
File: 16 KB, 480x360, hqdefault.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7777049

>>7774190
>Garlic
>Shallots
>Mushrooms

Looking good

>Cream cheese
>Egg
>Chives

Oh shit what are you doing

>> No.7777053

>>7774481
Guys I'm shit at cooking and a newfag. What exactly was so bad about this?

>> No.7777067
File: 126 KB, 254x205, 1452219548832.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7777067

>>7774481

>> No.7777068

>>7777053

Buy a cookbook or google recipes. Follow directions.

>> No.7777109

>>7777068
So that's it? The fact that it wasn't actual carbonara? That's not so bad.

>> No.7777117

>>7774481

>rinsing pasta
triggered

>using metal utensils in nonstick pot
TRIGGERED

>melting american cheese slices into cream of chicken soup with hotdogs to make carbonara
T R I G G E R E D

>> No.7777130

>>7777777

>> No.7777134

>>7768069

The tilted camera angle and set layout definitely adds a feeling of anxiety and ill ease to this video, maybe the person filming actually knows what he's doing

>> No.7777146

>>7777134
The whole video is so full of mistakes and wrongness some think it's a cooking lesson, in a "list all the problems in this video"
I don't think so, why would there be cooking and camera problems, what kind of school cover both subjects?

>> No.7777156

>>7777053
If you don't understand why it's a foul mess then you must be either retarded or so sheltered and poverty-stricken that I'm surprised you're using a computer

>> No.7777159

>>7773656
He voted for Cruz.

>> No.7777169

>>7770652
>>7771928
what show is this guys, kinda want to watch it now

>> No.7777201

>>7777169
The Restaurant UK

Dunno which series this is from though, there's been 2

>> No.7777541

>>7774352
WHY IS EVERYTHING THIS MAN MAKES UNDERCOOKED

WHY

>> No.7777543

>>7774370
OH GOD>>7774373

>> No.7777570

>>7777541
His son said he only cooks for YouTube videos, other than that they go out for food.

He just tries to get everything done as quickly as possible it seems.

>> No.7777595
File: 1015 KB, 1280x720, jack's non-newtonian marinade.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7777595

>> No.7777600

>>7774370

The type of knife, cutting surface, and amount of force used makes me extremely uncomfortable with this webm.

>> No.7777619

>>7773238
>>7773238
So was she. She keeps checking her hand.

>> No.7777640

>>7774169
He doesnt; he was flicking it into the waiting mouth of his wife. It's this weird fucked up thing they do with all canned foods.

>> No.7777652

>>7772082
>>7773462

no it didn't come off clean.. it scalped her.. the rest of the video shows that part of her skin separated in a clean line and it starts to bleed pretty bad right at the end...

>> No.7777670
File: 9 KB, 264x200, Ragrets+_4563d75776f616079a3774e27ef8ce08.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7777670

>>7770635
>maximum cuts out of your onion

>> No.7777687

>>7777595
i like your filename bro

>> No.7777700

>>7777652
Where do you see her bleeding?

>> No.7777710

>>7777700

its not in that webm.. its on the full videos other places on the net.

>> No.7777714

>>7774373
>that use things like fresh ingredients and herbs.

and replaces them all with mayonnaise

>> No.7777753

>>7775101

>that grimace and sets the bowl down while constantly stirring it and pretending it was good...

>> No.7777816

>>7777777

>> No.7777895

>>7777156
Ok.
Sorry guy.

>> No.7777914

>>7774327
why the fuck he open his arms when he is trying his abobinations?

>> No.7777924

>>7777914
He has to spread his arms so that his tits stop crushing his gullet and he can swallow.

>> No.7778171
File: 662 KB, 1944x2592, 1457569148365.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778171

>>7774481
This one makes me real sad... She is prob. just doing her best with what she can get, they look very poor. That look from her husband, just real sad. Am I a faggot?

>> No.7778219

>>7768114
Oh my stars she is

>> No.7778273

>>7774481
This is every Filipino cooking video though.

>> No.7778286

>>7778219
I can't tell if it's truly a butter knife or not. but if it is I assume that's all people will let her have with the way she cuts stuff

>> No.7778331
File: 43 KB, 625x656, 1454882203408.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778331

>>7768247

>> No.7778343

>>7774414
DING DING DING
>correct

>> No.7778345

>>7774327
You know, you notice that many other youtube channels don't show the people eating the food after, they seemed kinda bias....

>> No.7778402

>>7777570
Yeah. Ja/ck/ would rather play video games and go out to eat than cook.

>> No.7778479

>>7774481

from the image, i thought it was bananer pudding with a bunch of vanilla wafers floating around in it.

i think i'd rather think that than the reality

>> No.7778511

>>7777159
Does he say this in a video?

>> No.7778548

>>7770635
>that condescending "okay?" like he's talking to a child
>holds an onion with a fork instead of cutting it in half
>those mediocre cooking skills with the confidence of a seasoned fine-dining chef
I don't hate many people, but jack makes it so easy.

>> No.7778558

>>7777595
How does he not realize the batter is far too thick to work with? Why does he keep trying to batter the piece of chicken when it's obviously not going to work? Why would he upload something like this to youtube with his name on it?
There are so many questions.

>> No.7778559

>>7778511
I'm, pretty sure Jack is a democrat, he's a fundy, but became one after he already lived well into adulthood... I can't source it in a sea of Jack videos but I think before he moved to Tennessee he was talking about guns at some point and tipped his hand a bit

>> No.7778595
File: 2.65 MB, 640x360, adventures in Jack.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778595

>> No.7778602

>>7774331
What a fat idiot, his hydrogenated fat clogged brain can't think lemme soften it up in the microwave first.
>>7774327
Fat fuck gotta get his calorie fix, mayo will do. I bet this idiot loses his shit if he eats lean foods.
>>7774352
Why isn't this guy dead yet? Is it true god protects the fat and stupid?
>>7777595
Just when you thought he couldn't do anything dumber, this asshole goes and tops himself. For fucks sake man.
>>7778595
Why couldn't those shredding wolverine type claws just slip out of his hands and impale him in the neck?

>> No.7778614

>>7778595
lmao

>> No.7778622

>>7778559
Do you mean Republican? I would have thought he would vote for Trump personally... Cruz is truly awful so I dislike Jack more if that's true.

>> No.7778634
File: 1.46 MB, 217x217, 1369710902567.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778634

>>7778595

>> No.7778653

>>7778622
I could be wrong, but I meant democrat.
Nothing he says or does would lead one to believe he had any left leanings at all, but I vaguely remember him talking about gun control for about 50 seconds in one video and he was in support of restricting them and I was surprised because of who he is.
There's no way I would be able to intentionally dig it out the video, I think it was Jack on the Go, but I don't know. I will even say it's possibly it's a false memory, but I'm not american and don't really give a shit about gun control so it'd be weird if it were.

Jack knows that openly talking party politics would only alienate potential viewers and so I would be surprised if he had a public trail about politics anywhere. What he does wear on his sleeve doesn't seem to vibe with the democrat schtick, but who knows maybe he's been a welfare queen in the past and still carries the torch.

>> No.7778681

>>7778653
Actually I think he mentioned his family was poor and lived on food stamps

>> No.7778689

>>7778681

Yeah that rings a bell too, in his mom videos, saying what a saint gadblessherheart she was for raising a bunch of kids on foodstamps, and he did not know until he was an adult because she was so good with it

>> No.7778698

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLUoc1vl4Cc&t=26

>> No.7778706
File: 49 KB, 634x534, 1465689011673.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778706

>>7778689
I bet his brother noticed it, Jack didn't because he has an IQ of 85 (if I'm generous).

>> No.7778723

>>7778706

Jack probably ate his brother's portions given the difference in body masses.
I don't think either are particularly bright, but Jack is definitely doing much better in life than most of his equals are

>> No.7778726

>>7778595
My favorite webm ruined. I love it.

>> No.7778736

>>7778723
How much of that is due to the fact that he is codependent on women in his life?

>> No.7778749

>>7778736

yeah. I don't know. Presently quite a lot, but I think he'd be able to live off of his youtube money if he didn't have a kid.

Previously? I can't say. We don't really know anything about his ex except that she was an alleged addict of some type (probably smoked pot occasionally) and was abusive. I don't think Jack's "Okay buddy...? be REAL careful!" programming would work great on too many radio stations, but he does have a good enough voice that I'm sure he'd have been able to keep regular work as a DJ. Would he live in opulence? probably not, but that's as much of a curse as a blessing to him

>> No.7778752

>>7777777

>> No.7778801

>>7777541
No it's totally fine. If you can eat beef rare then why not chicken? They're both meat after all.

>> No.7778806

>>7778801
if you want it medium rare just pop it into a microwave for 10-15 seconds doe

>> No.7778821
File: 1.85 MB, 1600x2560, 1435277862401.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778821

>>7777595
I think this one is my favourite. It'll be okay, Jack. You'll get it right one day.

>> No.7778850

>>7778806
I want it juicy...

>> No.7778868

>>7778801
>If you can eat beef rare then why not chicken?

chicken is a lizard, thus has salmonella

>> No.7778873
File: 1.58 MB, 1440x1080, 1452034753800.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7778873

>>7778821
Well he hasn't yet and he has been doing this shit for 8 years

>> No.7778879

Jack is a modern day arsenic eater. Follow his directions at your peril.

>> No.7778954

>>7777595

that stuff behaves like magnets. it makes literally no sense for any fluid, i havent seen ANYTHING move and stick like that, become soft again, then sticky. and i cook a lot.

>> No.7778975

>>7774352
This almost made me vomit.

>> No.7778998

>>7777595
Flashbacks to primary school science

>> No.7778999

>>7778954
How have you not interacted with non-newtonian fluids and specifically cornstarch and water before? What about honey or ketchup?

>> No.7779002
File: 104 KB, 692x389, reeses.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7779002

>>7778171
No. It's what you're describing. At least they love each other.

>> No.7779006
File: 168 KB, 654x604, 1464571658104.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7779006

>>7774481
Don't know what to feel. The dish is, at best, inauthentic. Doesn't look like a complete trainwreck, but does look trashy. On the other hand, they're impoverished and are making dishes that they (presumably) like to eat, even though 4chan autists like to deride everything they see through the comfort of their computer screen.


Doesn't look terrible, definitely isn't carbonara, but something about the fact that she felt the urge to publish the video, showing that at least someone enjoys it, is endearing.

>> No.7779025

>>7778999

no cornstarch acts one second like soft paste and then like superglue. watch the video and tell me it does any sense.

>> No.7779050

>>7768069

https://youtu.be/vmLaWu8kWfU
>hot lettuce

>> No.7779064

>>7778954
>>7779025
it's not stirred in - the stuff at the bottom is mostly cornstarch, the stuff on top is more diluted.

If he stirred it, it would be a thick paste, probably needs another tsp or two of liquid.

>> No.7779090

>>7779025

It does depending on the proportion of water to starch.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-Newtonian_fluid

>> No.7779290

>>7779025
That is what I would expect, non-newtonian fluids tense under impact stress and yield otherwise. Go make some with different amounts of water and you'll see this demonstrated easily.

>> No.7779454

>>7778698
Dat juicy pineapple.

>> No.7779517

>>7774370
arrrgghhhh don't cut that burger with your good kitchen knife on an earthenware plate.

>> No.7779522

>>7779050
>hot lettuce
>what is petit pois à la Francais

>> No.7779531

>cu/ck/s who don't know Marie

>> No.7779535

>tfw /tv/ has better ja/ck/ threads than /ck/

>> No.7779556

>>7777595
>All that cornstarch on the side of the bowl that hasn't been mixed in

What ratio of starch to liquid did he use?

>> No.7779588
File: 50 KB, 716x724, 1437546498151.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7779588

>>7779556
like jack measures anything

>> No.7779598

>>7775916
>mockoutrage.jpg

>> No.7779634

>>7777595
Why didn't he just thin it with something? It's not fucking rocket surgery.

>> No.7779639

>>7768272
Wow someone bought the SlapChop.

>> No.7779658

>>7774481
C-clean the stove.

>:(

>> No.7779667

>>7774370
>>7774373
That's just unsafe.

>> No.7779703

>>7771928
Holy fuck that made Raymond Blanc visibly upset.

>> No.7779708

>>7779667

typical pleb

clearly you aren't a connoisseur of rare meats

>> No.7779713

>>7777595

This one actually turns out fucking awesome, probably the only success story he has.

>> No.7779715

>>7768069
...this is exactly how I chop onions.
I can't see what she is doing wrong.

>> No.7779716

>>7779708
Sorry, Jack. Teach me your ways.

>> No.7779719
File: 2.67 MB, 640x360, JackGarbageStew.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7779719

Cooking is a art not a science. You just gotta do what feels right and it'll turn out good.

>> No.7779725

>>7779719

it seems to be going ok until he finds his tin opener and unleashes pandora's box

>> No.7779733

>>7779719
I'll never drink Lagunitas again.

>> No.7779748

>>7775767
I think he was trying to stab the seed and he slipped.

>> No.7779750

>>7779719
Hot dog stew. Jesus

>> No.7779751

>>7768272
Do people really not know what Porn & Bean salad is?

>> No.7779754

>>7779751
>Porn & Bean salad
You have my interest

>> No.7779757

>>7779050

cooked lettuce is delicious

>> No.7779760

>>7779751

>porn and bean salad

i thought i was the only one!

>> No.7779788

>>7779748
>he

>> No.7779789

>>7777714
Fuck I laughed

>> No.7779801

>>7778343
>smells like ass

>> No.7779811

>>7774414
Should've cooked the steak first then topped it and quick broil

>> No.7779988

>>7779719

where does he get canned pink sock?

>> No.7780065

>>7779050

so many bad cooks given undue exposure on youtube

>> No.7780073

>>7774104

it's just not jack unless something is curdling

>> No.7780079

>>7774327

i wonder if he was thinking about the sour cream cake and his fat addled brain thought mayo should substitute since it looks sort of the same

>> No.7780209
File: 70 KB, 300x374, 1444875333151.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
7780209

>> No.7780347

>>7775767
Fake, that avacado would have turned brown long before you got to the hospital

>> No.7780422

>>7779719
Jesus H Christ.

>Serves a bowl with one roasted red pepper in it

>> No.7780692

>>7768325
top kek

>> No.7780699

>>7773629
oil not even hot. How fucking stupid can you be?

>> No.7780755

>>7775101
That's her dad.

>> No.7781190

>>7778873
does that guy EVER BLINK!

>>
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