/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.8882386]

What is the worst thing your friends/roommates/family has done in the kitchen?

[Anonymous No.8882393]

Tried to make treacle in my good pot. He burnt it and the stuff turned to fucking stone. Had to hammer and chisel that shit out.

[Anonymous No.8882414]

>>8882386
Drank all my fucking coffee that piece of shit!

[Anonymous No.8882426]

>>8882386
My roommate (girl) got really drunk one night and slept walked past two bathrooms and pissed in the kitchen sink

We know this because she left her piss soaked panties in the sink

[Anonymous No.8882494]

>>8882426
Did u fug?

[Anonymous No.8882507]

>>8882494
No she was pretty gross

[Anonymous No.8882522]

He boiled vinegar

[Anonymous No.8882528]

>>8882426
she could have just pissed herself and thrown her underwear in the sink because she was inept and forgot about it because of the booze

seems a little more likely, my man

[Anonymous No.8882538]

>>8882386
>my mother uses a fork in the teflon pan
>she actually scratches the PTFE coating to a amount where it is useless

>she once overheated a teflon pan
>it smoked and released poisonus gas

[Anonymous No.8882551]

Came out of their bedroom to yell at me for using a metal spoon to taste what I was cookin in a nonstick pan.

Also, smashed my garlic while I was chopping because "it's shortcut when you chop garlic didn't you know about this teehee" ...I was trying to get that sweet even tiny dice and work on my knife skills, and keep the garlic oil in the clove, not all over the cutting board!

[Anonymous No.8882568]

>>8882507
Who the fuck cares, i would have had them knickers in my mouth fist pumping at light speed.

[Anonymous No.8882666]

>>8882551
I pray I never become as beta as you.

[Anonymous No.8882721]

Washed my cast iron pan my dad gave me with soap and water and left it outside to dry because we were tight on counter space. She had her heart in the right place but has always been a space cadet in the kitchen.

[Anonymous No.8882728]

>>8882386
nothing compared to me Tbh

[Anonymous No.8882731]

>>8882721

There is nothing wrong with anything she did bro.

The only way she could have done better is if she threw that shit in the trash directly.

[Anonymous No.8882737]

>>8882731
Nice bait

[Anonymous No.8882747]

>>8882522

[Anonymous No.8882753]

>>8882737

I was as serious as cancer. Fuck that shit.

[Anonymous No.8882761]

>cuts meat on wooden cutting board
>leaves rag used for wiping counters on wooden cutting board

[Anonymous No.8882769]

My roommate made a pot of spaghetti bolognese and left it on the counter to become rancid and refused to clean it up for a week.

I eventually picked up the pot and threw it in the garbage. Then he said "Where's my pot" and then I said I threw it out and he got mad and said "What the fuck?" and I asked if he was going to clean it up today and he said no and went back to his room.

Moved out after that.

[Anonymous No.8882771]

>>8882522
For...what purpose?

[Anonymous No.8882776]

>>8882771
To make his coffee boil faster.

[Anonymous No.8882782]

>>8882386
>Halfway through culinary school
>Roomies ask if I can "show off" the fruits of my education for Sunday dinner
>Decide to do it since my roommates have never asked me to cook for them in the three years I've been with them
>Spend $70 of my own money to make a three course dinner from scratch
>Sunday night comes
>"Hey anon we went out and got some Jack, get out of the kitchen already so we can kick back some beers and burgers!"

[Anonymous No.8882783]

>>8882776

[Anonymous No.8882785]

>>8882769
and then what happened?

[Anonymous No.8882791]

>>8882785
I also got a better job so I could afford to live alone

[Anonymous No.8882808]

>>8882782
That's just sad...what were you preparing for him?

[Anonymous No.8882844]

>>8882808
There were four of us in that house, the menu was gonna be rock cod risotto, lamb cordon bleu made with etorki and served alongside steamed potatoes, and raspberry brownies (one being a weed brownie because one of the roomies was a degenerate and I decided to humor him for once). I made it on Monday instead but I was fucking pissed that they just forgot they asked me to cook for them.

[Anonymous No.8882869]

>>8882844
Fucking assholes. I would have eaten it and then had sex with you.

[Anonymous No.8882870]

>>8882731
>>8882753

[Anonymous No.8882874]

>>8882869
nah seems more like a failure to communicate, and being a beta /ck/ bitch he probably just assumed shrugging was enough of a yes for his roomies to save the date

[Anonymous No.8882884]

>>8882844
That sounds absolutely wonderful anon, I'm sorry they missed out

[Anonymous No.8883403]

>>8882538
>>my mother uses a fork in the teflon pan
She's got nothing on my brother. He cleaned a teflon pan with steel wool. It didn't just scratch the teflon coating, it ripped half of it off.

What's even worse is that he had worked for nearly 4 years as a cook.

[Anonymous No.8883422]

>>8882522
My roommate does this too. Nasty ass vinegar hotdogs. I want to strangle him.

[Anonymous No.8883431]

>>8882721
Soap and water isn't going to do anything to the seasoning, unless it's seriously heavy duty soap. Pretty stupid for not thinking of the rusting though.

[Anonymous No.8883434]

>>8882568
>delicious HPV

[Anonymous No.8883437]

>>8882761
I do this all the time
seems like it's not a problem if you wash it right after..

[Anonymous No.8883462]

>>8882386
My roommate's fatass sister loves to leave Styrofoam take out containers in the oven and forget about them. Then turn the oven on with it still in there.

[Anonymous No.8883475]

>>8882783
My mistake, you're actually supposed to salt the vinegar first.

[Anonymous No.8883491]

My gf didn't know how to boil God damn water even we first met. She literally set my kitchen on fire trying to make dinner

[Anonymous No.8883493]

>>8883462
Wtf. Why do they even put them in the oven in the first place?

[Anonymous No.8883497]

I woke up one morning with one of my pot on the gaz
This retard went out to party one night, came back absolutetly trashed and decided to cook pasta. Apparently he fell asleep while boiling the water and it stayed on the stove for hours.

[Anonymous No.8883511]

>>8883493
Because as far as I can tell, she thinks anything that's in the fridge is fair game since that's what she does to food in the fridge. My brother and I just ended up getting a mini fridge to stop her eating our leftovers.

[Anonymous No.8883526]

>>8883511
Ok she steals your food but why does the Styrofoam container go in the oven? What reason would anyone have for putting disposable plastic into an oven? Does she use it as a trash bin? Does she heat the food in the Styrofoam container?

[Anonymous No.8883533]

>>8883526
Because she believes if she puts it in the fridge, it'll get eaten.

[Anonymous No.8883551]

>>8883533
Jesus that is annoying. Also gratz on getting dubs twice in a row.

[Anonymous No.8883925]

Roommate once tried to make chicken parmesan.

>spoonful of flour on chicken breasts
>1/4 bottle of ragu on each breast

And bake.

[Anonymous No.8883966]

Putting my knifes into the dishwasher...

[Anonymous No.8883981]

>>8882386
Old roommate used to boil chicken in a pot and then try to wash it off in the dishwasher. It never came out clean and always had little chicken bits stuck all over the inside.

[Anonymous No.8883995]

>>8882386
my mom thought it would be a good idea to pan fry ravioli

still to this day the worst thing i've ever eaten.

[Anonymous No.8883999]

>>8883995
>pan fry ravioli
She must be a complete hick if her first thought was to fry her food.

[Anonymous No.8884007]

Relative only feeds child home cooked meals or uses foods without dyes. Everything tastes horrible. Also whenever a recipe says you can substitute an ingredient for something else, it's usually taken as a serious suggestion and makes whatever crap is being made taste even worse.

[Anonymous No.8884008]

Even being in the kitchen. I hate other people being in my kitchen.

[Anonymous No.8884015]

>>8883981
Lol wait the chicken was put in the dishwasher or the pot?

[Anonymous No.8884028]

>>8884015
The pot. Little bits of chicken fat would stick to the pot and just not come off. He'd burn eggs in a pan and try to wash that in the dishwasher too, which also failed to clean properly. I don't know why washing things by hand is so fucking hard for some people.

[Anonymous No.8884039]

>>8883925

[Anonymous No.8884067]

>>8882568
>knickers
Please spell the word Knickers
>Can you use it in sentence ?

[Anonymous No.8885111]

Roommate had never used a microwave oven, thought it was the same as a gas stove. She microwaved a chicken for two hours - ended up with a blackened ball, the bones turned to jelly, and it set the bin on fire when she tried to throw it away.

[Anonymous No.8885151]

I had this hippy roommate who wanted to compost. Great, I've done it for ages. Her idea was to put leftovers in a mason jar until it became rancid and then pour it into a small hole in the ground.

Her 'cooking' was also absolutely horrific I think I have PTSD

>she got a masters in environmental something or other

[Anonymous No.8885199]

>>8883497
>I woke up one morning with one of my pot on the gaz
>pot on the gaz
>this gaz?

[Anonymous No.8885307]

>>8882386
My grandma has started losing her fucking mind and was slowly getting worse with her cooking to the point where I just started cooking for my and I.

On at least two occasions she put vegetable oil in chocolate pudding it basically had the consistency of Jello. When she would make meatloaf it consisted of nothing but ground beef with ketchup on top without any kind of seasoning or other ingredients.

[Anonymous No.8885329]

>>8885307
>I just started cooking for my and I
Meant to say for my dad and I.

[Anonymous No.8885372]

4 years ago, I bought a whole new kitchen set of non stick pots and pans. It was all Teflon, so I got a whole set of wooden cooking utensils to go with it.
Thanksgiving just a month later, the women chase me out of my kitchen - saying they know all about cooking and everything would be just fine.
But they ignored everything I said and found the metal cooking utensils in a drawer. Sure enough, $400 worth of Teflon coating destroyed in under an hour. They even managed to overheat a pan so the Teflon was burned right off the whole bottom of it.
MFW, the whole Thanksgiving dinner was contaminated with Teflon.

[Anonymous No.8885572]

>>8883966
I'm so sorry anon.

[Anonymous No.8885610]

>>8882844
>Eating fish

Fucking homosexual.

[Anonymous No.8885657]

>>8885372
>i was beta and something bad happened because i left objectively inferior people dominate me

man, that never happens in life. It's almost like telling people to fuck off from your possessions might be a good idea.

[Anonymous No.8885668]

>>8885657
They are all permanently b& from my kitchen, and they all know why.

[Anonymous No.8885679]

>>8885111
She set the fucking bin on fire?

[Anonymous No.8885682]

Female roommate can't really cook. I was making something in the kitchen. She was grating cucumber for a cucumber salad. I'm cutting something, look over to her, she's grinding cheese into the salad.

[Anonymous No.8885731]

>Dad had a cooking idea he got online.
>Today we shall make chili pepper jam.
>Wake to the house being mace and the parrot screaming.
>Eyes are watering and stumble into the kitchen coughing.
>All the doors and windows are open, it is doing nothing as this hellish liquid churns.
>He used Thai peppers in it.
>Find him in the backyard prepping himself to come back in the house.
>"Heh, that stuff is kind of stings eh?"

[Anonymous No.8885732]

>metal utensils on teflon
>leave takeout containers everywhere then complain about trash everywhere
>dishwasher has become the new cupboard
>cooking is the equivalent of Jack's garbage stew on a smaller scale and with half the spice rack
>"the flavor of steak comes from the spices"

[Anonymous No.8885739]

>>8885731
>"Heh, that stuff kind of stings eh?"
That's hilarious anon, I hope the parrot's okay at least.

[Anonymous No.8885748]

>>8884067
Google it tard. Lurn to green text too.

[Anonymous No.8885752]

>>8885682
>grinding cheese into the salad.

Whats wrong with this?

[Anonymous No.8885755]

>>8882522
i boil it in my electric glass kettle to get the mineral deposits off.

[Anonymous No.8885758]

>>8885748
>green text
Lurk moar, newfag.

[Anonymous No.8885765]

>>8885752

I know that some people are fatties and just can't stop putting cheese in a salad....but....a normal salad is one thing...cheese in a *cucumber* salad? WTF?

[Anonymous No.8885770]

>>8885748
>Lurn to green text

I think you meant meme text. Fucking SUMMER CAMP KIDS.

[Anonymous No.8885811]

>>8885765

Sorry. If that's the worst thing you've seen someone do in a kitchen then basically what you are saying is that the worst thing you have seen someone do in a kitchen is make a proper fucking salad.

Go sit in the corner till I say you can come out.

[Anonymous No.8885822]

A few years ago I lived with a guy. His parents moved into a new house and he basically inherited the "old" house. Two floors, five bedrooms. Lots of roommates, people moving in and moving out.

They're all lazy about doing dishes, and running OUT of dishes is an impetus for the dishes getting done. He told me a year before they had accumulated so many random dishes from people moving in and out that one time the dirty dishes piled up out of the sink to the CEILING. Low-hanging ceiling above the sink, but still at least four fucking feet worth of dishes. They decided to sort and purge most of their extra kitchen stuff after that.

Now, one from me, same place:
I had a can of coconut milk. I used a little for something, then I put the can back in the fridge. When I came back to it a few days later it had obviously congealed, so I put it in a pot with some water around it and left it to simmer.
I totally forgot about it, and later another roommate was pissed that I'd baked a layer of nasty burnt blackened coconut milk all over the bottom of her pot.
I immediately told her I'd buy her a new one, but I went to clean it off and the burnt layer just came right off and the pot cleaned up perfectly.

[Anonymous No.8885823]

>>8885731
>and the parrot screaming

I don't know why but this part got me laughing like maniac.

[Anonymous No.8885833]

>>8885732
>cooking is the equivalent of Jack's garbage stew on a smaller scale and with half the spice rack
would you share some details

[Anonymous No.8885852]

>>8885811
>grinded cucumber
>grinded gouda
>vinegar
>sugar

Let that sink in anon. Let that sink in.

[Anonymous No.8885877]

>>8885668
I do hope you told them to replace them for you.

[Anonymous No.8885913]

went out of town for a few days for work. come back to a pile of dishes and pizza boxes on the countertops. asks me if i want to go out for dinner because he doesnt feel like cleaning. cannot wait to live on my own.

[Anonymous No.8886016]

>>8882386
>roommate's friend crashing on the couch
>decides to heat up leftovers on the stove in the middle of the night
>she did not understand how the stove worked
>managed to leave the gas on low with the burner off
>woke up to strong smell of gas
>had to shut off the gas/air out the house
>fortunately it was summer and there were several windows open

[Anonymous No.8886018]

I have four really shitty roommates who constantly fuck up the kitchen. Luckily almost none of the kitchen stuff is mine, I've kept all mine in boxes in storage, but it still pisses me off.
>roommate 1 routinely uses a fork and knife to cut up food while it's in a nonstick pan, scratching the coating
I tried to explain to her once that it was really bad to do that, that it irreversibly messes up the pan and that eating bits of nonstick coating are bad for you, and she started leaving passive aggressive notes in the kitchen insulting my cooking.
>roommates 1 and 2 reuse the same dirty cookie sheet, which was mine and was brand new just a few months ago, baking the grease onto it over and over again. it looks like shit now, I've owned baking sheets for years that never ended up looking like this one.
>roommate 4 NEVER does dishes, despite the fact that he's the only one besides me that does actual cooking (as in, not just reheating frozen food)
>any time roommates 1, 2, or 3 do dishes, almost all of the dishes are still dirty because they've been washed in cold water, all tupperwares are greasy, food still caked on to most dishes and pans, and they stack things together so nothing dries
I no longer wash dishes after I use them because I always have to wash them before I use them, and I'm tired of cleaning up after them.
>roommate 3 will eat EVERYTHING you leave in the fridge or cupboard, even if you leave notes on it to not eat it, even half-eaten food. I now keep all my good food in a mini fridge and in my room, only keeping vegetables and things that require a lot of cooking in the main fridge, because he doesn't cook
>all roommates stack up trash on top of an already overfull trash can, then complain to me that people are stacking trash on top of the full trash can and ask me to take it out
In the time it took you to complain, you could have taken it out yourself...

I'm moving out in a month from now, already paid on a new apartment.

[Anonymous No.8886054]

>>8886018
Get yourself a big bag of sugar free gummi bears or worms.
Put them in a plastic container with a note not to eat them. and put that in the fridge.

Wait for roommate #3 to swipe them.
>better than ex lax.

[Anonymous No.8886072]

>>8886054
>>better than ex lax.

This isn't kitchen related, but one of my biggest pet peeves about roommate #3 is that he has his own bathroom downstairs, that no one else uses, yet he will come upstairs to use my bathroom and I'm not kidding you, he gets shit EVERYWHERE. Shit on the back of the toilet seat, all in the hinges, shit on the floor. Literally poop on the floor. I don't want to give him laxatives because I have to clean it up.

He's gay so his anus is just loose and I guess he can't help but shit everywhere, I just wish he would either clean up after himself or use his own fucking bathroom.

Last night he came and knocked on my door to let me know he bought toilet paper that "isn't made of mummy wrappings." I didn't even buy the cheap toilet paper. He's so full of himself. He owns the house. Roommates 1 & 2 are moving out together next month and me and roommate #5 who is actually really cool are moving out as well and we're leaving roommies 3 and 4 alone here to shit on each other in peace.

[Anonymous No.8886096]

>>8886054

Listen to this anon. Also make things intolerably spicy.

[Anonymous No.8886126]

>>8886072

>shitting everywhere

God that reminds me I went to some faggot play in the faggot region of NYC and went to the bathroom. Big fucking mistake. The sounds. The stench. The faggot moaning and whining. The plops of gobs of semen hitting the so called water. The bits of shit, toilet paper and used condoms covering the floor and walls. The horrors that used to be sinks. The gaps between the stalls so they can eye each other. The most terrifying scrawlings of people asking to be pozzed and for daddies and drugs.

The play was hilarious though.

[Anonymous No.8886208]

>>8885731
parrot got cucked

[Anonymous No.8886214]

>>8883434
>not getting an hpv vac
ISHYGDDT

[Anonymous No.8886234]

>>8885151
I would eat that burger.

[Anonymous No.8886275]

>>8885329
And you let your grandma keep cooking for herself. thats fucked up.

[Anonymous No.8886330]

>>8882426
You say this like its a bad thing.

[Anonymous No.8886363]

>>8882522
boiling vinegar gets rid of smells in the house

[Anonymous No.8886371]

>be making fries in the oven
>oven set to 450
>take fries out 30 minutes later
>limp and soggy
>check oven temp
>"Hey Anon, did you know you set the oven to almost 500 degrees? I turned it down for you"

[Anonymous No.8886373]

>>8882568
did you see a picture of her somehow or something?
fuck man u guys are nasty

[Anonymous No.8886376]

>>8882728
YOU MOTHERFUCKER

[Anonymous No.8886379]

>>8886363
Interesting. I usually just kick your mom out

[Anonymous No.8886386]

>>8886373
Post one

[Anonymous No.8886532]

>>8883403
I knew not to use metal and only softly clean teflon pans when I was probably 7. What the fuck is wrong with these people?

My friend freaked the fuck out at me the other week. I told him to not use metal on his pans. Then when he was done his stir fry, he just poured the food in a big bowl, puts the nice pan his mom bought him under the pan, and turned the tap on, steaming the fucking hot ass pan.

When I told him this, he freaked out "WHAT THE FUCK! STOP FUCKING TELLING ME WHAT TO DO!"

Sorry for fucking caring about your stuff. I left after that, he called and said sorry. I said "ok, but I'm never, ever going to tell you what to do again. You know how you needed help fixing your car next week? Take it to a mechanic. I'm not telling you what to do with that either."

[Anonymous No.8886558]

>>8886532
Bragging about being a catty bitch, interesting strategy let's see how it plays out...

[Anonymous No.8886564]

>>8884028
fucking retards. The nice thing about living alone is you don't have to deal with them fucking up your kitchen. Also, I can drink beer all hours of the day or night on the couch and don't *feel* like an alcoholic.

[Anonymous No.8886576]

>>8886564
About to move in with my girlfriend who, unfortunately, is really shitty about doing dishes. At least I know she'll not ruin my knives/cookware and I can leave them in the kitchen.

[Anonymous No.8886578]

>>8882769
I do this too. If they wont wash it, its going bye bye

[Anonymous No.8886584]

>>8886558
sorry, are you saying I'm being a catty bitch?

[Anonymous No.8886590]

>>8886584
yes, obviously
you had an argument with your friend and are now reneging on helping him to punish him for offending you

[Anonymous No.8886612]

>>8886590
fair enough. I'm not gonna be yelled at, then help someone for 4 hours fixing there car. I don't ever get yelled at, when I do for no reason, it pisses me off.

This guy does nothing but sit on his ass and smoke weed. Everything gets given to him. He has no reason to yell at me or anyone else. If I helped him, I would be the bitch the way I look at it.

I understand what you are saying though.

[Anonymous No.8886615]

>>8886578
The first house I lived in we were all so bad about doing dishes I threw out everything but one bowl, one plate, one cup, and a set of utensils for everyone, and like a single cast iron pan and a pot. It was a dumb, eighteen hear old bitch move, but it did work for a time.

Oh, I also owned all the dishes. I wouldn't throw away someone else's shit.

[Anonymous No.8886635]

>>8886612
Kill yourself, roastie

[Anonymous No.8886646]

After ignoring my warnings my brother once attempted to deep-fry potatoes in a pot on the stove top.

I told that motherfucker it was a bad idea. When I couldn't convince him otherwise, I warned him again to keep his fuckin' eyes on the pot the whole time.

Long story short, I come back inside from havin' a ciggy to find a massive fire engulfing the stovetop. My apartment was rapidly filling up with smoke, and when I tried to smother the fire, it only caused the damp towels I was using to catch on fire. Apparently there is a hollow space under the stovetop making it near impossible to smother a grease fire if the burning grease runs underneath. After plastering about a dozen damp towels all over every inch of the stove I was finally able to put the fire out.

Why not use a fire extinguisher you might ask? Well I tried that, but the extinguisher that came with my apartment had fucking zero pressure. Let that be a lesson to you, I guess.

Afterwards, I found out that my brother had brought the oil up to temp, added potatoes, and then fucked off to his room to smoke a bowl and forgot about the whole thing. What an asshole. Luckily all I had to do was replace the stove and the vents above it.

[Anonymous No.8886648]

>>8886615
lol. When I moved out with my first gf, she was the worst and keeping the place clean. I eventually did the one bowl/plate/cup thing. It saved my ass!

I remember once she used my single dishes, so all were in the sink. I came back for work, and saw it, said hello, and then turned around and walked out the door. "where are you going anon?"

"I'm going to grab a bite."

"can I come? Where are you going?"

"to the sub shop. You can stay here and clean all the dishes. That is why I'm going out to eat."

Fuck that, I was working 12 hour days. I'm not a dishwasher for you. Clean the fuck up.

[Anonymous No.8886666]

>>8886648
>>8886612
you the same guy by any chance?
any more stories about how your friends and family don't appreciate your brilliance?

[Anonymous No.8886669]

>>8886666
nice digits my man

[Anonymous No.8886679]

>>8882551
>using a metal spoon to taste what I was cookin in a nonstick pan

The only mistake made here was that they didn't make you lick the kitchen floor right clean in a made outfit.

[Anonymous No.8886689]

>>8886666

>Satan quads

Noice. Checked.

[Anonymous No.8886697]

>>8886648
Yup. same guy. I don't like to put up with bullshit. If "brilliance" to you is what I was preaching, wow. You want another story?

"don't put pans in the fridge with tomato sauce and pasta in the fridge. Put it in a bowl. and cover it with plastic wrap"

That must be brilliance.

[Anonymous No.8886705]

my husband cooks steak in a nonstick pan

[Anonymous No.8886711]

>>8886697
are you autistic?

[Anonymous No.8886714]

>>8886646
I couldn't live with him after that to be honest.

[Anonymous No.8886716]

>>8886711
no. sorry I didn't handle this shit like you would.

[Anonymous No.8886721]

>>8886705
mb he just like blood dripping blue rare steak like me.

[Anonymous No.8886763]

>>8885111
bullshit. you can't set a microwave to two hours without constantly resetting it, and she'd smell it while doing so.
>also nice digits

[Anonymous No.8886776]

>>8885307
>>8885329
>>8886275
This, wtf dude your gma has Alzheimer's you have to look after her or put her in a home, she can't fend for herself anymore retard

[Anonymous No.8886779]

Chekm

[Anonymous No.8886785]

>>8885852
sounds like a fancy coleslaw, faggot

[Anonymous No.8886804]

>>8886584
>sorry, are you saying I'm being a catty bitch?

[Anonymous No.8886816]

>>8882386
My brother decided to buy and only use beer mugs as cups in the apartment.
He never washed his mugs and other dishes either so I ended up cleaning them every day.
Got sick of that shit coming home seeing the sink with +4 mugs and his quick sloppy meals I stopped doing the dishes for a month. It got so bad that a bowl of cereal+milk started curling up and smelled like bad cheese before he cleaned up his mess.

[Anonymous No.8886898]

>>8885731
I don't normally lol irl, but this was one of those times

[Anonymous No.8886922]

>>8886816
When mates do this I insist that status quo may continue if they cover 5%-10% more of rent.

Ain't doing that shit for free.

[Anonymous No.8886931]

made rice krispie treats in my stainless steel pot and didn't clean it

[Anonymous No.8886941]

A lot of the worst things I've seen in the kitchen have come from my sister.

How my sister "cooks":
>put ingredients in pot/pan, turn on stove
>go back to room, watch tv, listen to music, go camwhoring, whatever
>1-2 hours later hear the fire alarm going off
>run to kitchen, smoke is filling the house
>eat whatever can be scraped out of the pans
>leave charred food-encrusted pans in sink "to soak"
>no amount of soaking ever lifts the burnt food
>days later Anon eventually needs the pot, so Anon gives in and spends an hour scraping it all off with a spoon and steel wool
>rinse and repeat

I'm glad she moved out a month ago. Her shitty habits are her own problem now. My parents, brother and I took turns cleaning her dirty pots and pans for the 13-ish years she was "cooking."

Another one from about 10 years ago:
>be me, 15 y/o
>older sister, 18 y/o, buys a coffee machine, but no one is allowed to use it except for her
>I buy a jar of instant coffee for myself to get my caffiene fix
>sister sees the jar, decides to use my instant coffee like regular coffee grounds
>uses half the jar, basically creates a super concentrated coffee slurry
>"ew I'm not drinking this"
>leaves it in her coffee machine because she doesn't want to clean it
>2 weeks later coffee pot is infested with a centimeter of mold

Eventually my poor sweet grandma who was living with us at the time cleaned it out.

[Anonymous No.8886998]

Cousin lived with me for a little bit, made some pasta in some pot and just let it sit there for a week and let it grow mold. Ended up having to throw the entire pot out

[Anonymous No.8887050]

>>8882782
>>8882844
Anon, did you actually tell them that you were serious about cooking dinner or did you just go "Yeah" and never speak of it again?

[Anonymous No.8887056]

>>8886705
I fail to see an issue.

[Anonymous No.8887059]

>>8885731
Your dad is awesome.

[Anonymous No.8887077]

>spend a sunday making chicken stock
>put pot of stock in sink with ice water to cool it before I put it in the fridge
>leave the kitchen to do something
>hear someone turn the faucet on

[Anonymous No.8887135]

>>8885151
What's the point of composting? Won't the stuff just compost once it hits the landfill?

[Anonymous No.8887177]

>>8887135
>he doesn't grow is own veggies

[Anonymous No.8887194]

How do I tell my roommate next year that they're not allowed to use my pans? I've lived with them for a year already (we're moving from the dorms to an apartment) but I want to be 100% clear that they're not to touch any of my shit because I know they'll try to scrub my cast iron or use metal on my nonsticks.

[Anonymous No.8887198]

>>8887194

If they're not idiots if you just tell them not to use themproperly it should be fine.. I've never had a problem myself but I'm kinda picky with roommates.

[Anonymous No.8887204]

>>8887198

*improperly

[Anonymous No.8887241]

>>8887198
When we first moved in together I told her how to use my coffee maker, specifically mentioning that it has to be opened up after being used or else mold will grow (old roommate was disgusting) and she can't handle even that simple task. I can't trust her with expensive pans. What do I say except "I can't risk you destroying all my shit"?

[Anonymous No.8887252]

>>8887177
I do. See pic. I think most people who compost don't grow.

[Anonymous No.8887255]

>>8887252
what's that vine at the middle back climbing up the cage?

[Anonymous No.8887259]

>>8887252
not to derail this thread, but composting can be wonderful. back when i lived with my mom, i had 30+ rose bushes and i actively composted (had a composting tumbler and also two piles that i rotated), and my roses were huge and lush.

composting is great when it's done right — it can turn into wonderful soil and fertilizer and your plants will thank you (if you have the time and space.)

[Anonymous No.8887265]

>>8887241

Maybe just tell her explicitly then keep them in your room or in a locked cupboard or cabinet?

[Anonymous No.8887268]

>>8887252
Snap bean.

[Anonymous No.8887273]

>>8887259

See

>>8885151

Now that's real composting.

[Anonymous No.8887274]

>>8887268
Phone posting. Meant for >>8887255

[Anonymous No.8887282]

>>8887268
ahh I see, those are good never seen them before summer

[Anonymous No.8887294]

>>8885731
That's such a dad thing to do; to colossally fuck up and just play it off.

[Anonymous No.8887418]

My roommate fucking burned pasta

[Anonymous No.8887494]

>>8883999
>>8883995
Its amazing if done right look up some recipies

[Anonymous No.8887739]

I moved back in with my mom a year ago to help with aging family and stuff. She doesn't clean up after herself at all. She puts half eaten food in the sink under water because "It's gotta soak :^)" and it stays in there forever because I refuse to clean up her bullshit and she does nothing but fuck random hood niggers. She doesn't even have a job and mooches off of her parents. The house is fucking disgusting outside of my room and I'm ashamed to live here.
Moving back out in a few months though can't fucking wait. Good luck assholes.

[Anonymous No.8887817]

>>8886363
>gets rid of smells in house
yeah, by replacing it with the smell of vinegar. Just clean your house like a normal person so the source of the smell is gone.

Anyway though, I had a roommate who would leave meat out on the counter to "defrost" all day and when she cooked it you could smell how rancid it was and she also wondered why she kept getting sick. She was a total bimbo bitch that would use up all my pads and claim it was "an emergency" so I never told her.

[Anonymous No.8887824]

My old roommate would make scrambled eggs by throwing the eggs into the pan and pick out the shells. Then scramble with a fork in the nonstick pan.

We had 2 fridges (5 people), and I had to put overflow party beer in his fridge and when I opened it there were boxes of eggs everywhere. There were literally over 150 eggs in that fridge.

[Anonymous No.8887834]

My one roommate in college had chicken go bad in our dorm twice. First time I threw it out, second time he cooked and ate it

[Anonymous No.8887840]

>>8882386
My brother in law savagely beat my sister and left their baby playing in her blood.

Well, that was in the dining room, so maybe worst thing in the kitchen was when these two homeless girls I was in a poly relationship with cleaned my kitchen as a thank you and one of them fucking washed my seasoned cast iron pan.

[Anonymous No.8887856]

>>8882386
my mom was drunkenly baking fish, and dumped a shitton of lemon-pepper seasoning and cumin powder on it.
horrible eats, worse shits
thanks mom

[Anonymous No.8887859]

my roomate used to complain i didn't do enough dishes, so one day i washed everything in the kitchen, including the cast iron pan he had been seasoning for quite some time

also he would keep his pots and pans inside the stove so i would turn on the stove to preheat it and come back to a bunch of cookware baking and warping... like five different times

[Anonymous No.8887860]

>>8882426
Reminds me of freshman year of college
>live in coed dorms
>hanging out in my room with friend, just talking
>girl comes home drunk, not functional enough to remember how to open the common space door or the girls' bathroom door (keycard and then code)
>decides my room will be the bathroom
>walks in, pulls down pants, squats and pisses in the middle of the floor
>mfw
College is a meme

[Anonymous No.8887911]

>>8886126
I've never really had any desire to visit NYC but you just ensured I will never set foot in the place

[Anonymous No.8887925]

>>8886379
kek

[Anonymous No.8887944]

My roomate set my cast iron pan in the sink, and soaked it in water.

[Anonymous No.8888010]

>>8882426
This is my fetish

[Anonymous No.8888037]

>>8885752
lol you fucking Americans man

o i am laffin

[Anonymous No.8888042]

>>8888037
we used to have cheese in salad all the time when i was a kid

like lettuce, cucumber, celery, carrot, and cheddar cubes..... it's really good

and i'm not american

[Anonymous No.8888050]

>>8886126
>I went to some faggot play in the faggot region of NYC and went to the bathroom

>The play was hilarious

Who is the faggot in this story?

[Anonymous No.8888062]

boiled sausage I had bought intending to fry

[Anonymous No.8888096]

>>8882386
>Roommate only knew how to fry food
>Usually turned out shitty but not the point
>He used a shit ton of oil and never put a lid on it
>Oil covers counters and floor every time he cooked
>He never cleaned it up

>Another roommate used the oven but he only broiled shit
>"I'll save time if it cooks faster"
>Pans always burnt to shit
>Took forever to clean them

>>8887859
Something similar to this too. Our kitchen was tiny so they just shoved dirty dishes in the oven on top of the dirty pans.

Also we had a sink with two sections, so I always did the dishes and cleaned one side out so I could defrost meat. It was still in the package (or ziploc bags) but my fucking room mates would always throw water into the half that had shit defrosting in it.

The worst thing I deal with now is babysitting a kid who refuses to wear clothes at the dinner table. Doesn't matter what meal it is, he just refuses to keep them on. His parents know he does it and they don't say shit, so I feel like an autist for being uncomfortable with it.

[Anonymous No.8888258]

>>8882386
Oh, I've got a fucking story for you.

>Girlfriend and I are getting ready to go on a ten day vacation, some time away to celebrate our recent independence from our respective overbearing families. We had pitched in and got a place with her best friend, and her best friend's boyfriend...and her best friend's sister who didn't officially live there but may as well have since she barely ever went the fuck home.
>The night before we leave, GF's best friend makes some admittedly good beef stew.
>There are leftovers. She made way too damn much.
>"Eh, we'll take care of it. You two go finish what you gotta do.", says the boyfriend.
>Next morning we go into the kitchen. The rest of the stew is still sitting in a pot on the counter.
>So guys...Guess you're gonna throw that away, right?
>"Yeah man, I'll take care of it after I'm done watching this."
>Alright.
>Go on vacation. Have a great time.
>Come home.
>The fuck is that smell?
>Go into the kitchen
>The beef stew is still there on the fucking counter.
>It's more mold and rot than stew. It looked like it belonged in a fucking John Carpenter movie.
>Girlfriend gets so queasy from the smell she runs to the bathroom to vomit.
>The three of them are sitting in the TV room.
>The TV room is filled with fucking empty pizza boxes, Chinese takeout shit, and the most strategically placed air fresheners ever.
>THE FUCK IS THIS?
>"Oh shit man, we were gonna clean it up before you got home. It just smelled reaaallly bad, ya know?"
>They also apparently fucked on our bed while we were gone. They never cleaned up. Semen and vaginal fluid stains all over the fucking sheets and comforter. Their bedroom was too close to the kitchen stank.

We moved out a month later once we found a cheap studio apartment.

I still can't enjoy beef stew.

[Anonymous No.8888279]

>>8887241
>hey anon can i use yr pans
>no
>WHYYYY
>because you fucked up my coffeemaker that's why, fuck you
and then you hide your pans in your room

[Anonymous No.8888285]

>>8886584
canadian detected

[Anonymous No.8888373]

>>8884007

>Relative only feeds child home cooked meals or uses foods without dyes

You know that's not a bad thing right?

[Anonymous No.8888376]

Happened a few years ago but the stench is burned into my memory for eternity.

> coming home from college for the summer
> my mom is able that year to come down and drive me home instead of my having to make a 10 hour bus trip
> great success, very nice
> ask where my brother is, apparently he wanted to stay home even though we're stopping in NYC for a couple days
> get home; mom has been away for almost a week at that point
> open the door
> cough
> gag
> stench like a thousand rotten corpses and a bathing-averse prostitute with a yeast infection
> brother had baked some fish in milk on like the first night my mom was gone and then left the pan sitting out in the kitchen with the milk and fish residue, which has gone seriously rancid and started to mold over
> this was during a heat wave, and my mom's house doesn't have air conditioning

It still boggles my mind. He's about my age so he was like 19 at the time and not mentally infirm or anything, either.

[Anonymous No.8888396]

>>8885852
>>8885765
>>8885682

anon you are a fucking pleb

[Anonymous No.8888403]

>>8885731
>parrot screaming.
Capsaicin doesn't effect birds.

[Anonymous No.8888406]

>>8886612
Dont let these retards troll you, Your idiot friend felt like a jackass because he was doing things wrong and you were correcting him, instead of learning from his mistakes he wants to pretend hes made no mistakes and youre just a bossy asshole, I wouldnt help that cunt either.

[Anonymous No.8888422]

>>8888403
you calling him a liar?

[Anonymous No.8888516]

>>8888422
I ain't calling him a truther that's for sure

[Anonymous No.8888581]

>>8882721
>muh seasoning
You do realise that it doesn't actually do anything?

[Anonymous No.8888660]

>>8886072

Sounds like a scene from Megg Mogg and Owl. you are owl.

[Anonymous No.8888662]

Nothing other than the asshole uses 90% of fridge space for himself.

[Anonymous No.8888671]

>>8882426
Did you suck the piss out of the panties while masturbating? I know I would have.

[Anonymous No.8888697]

>>8885668

I don't understand what it is with women and fucking nonstick cookware. Are they retarded? I have never met a single woman who could get it through their fucking head not to use metal implements or the highest heat setting when cooking in Teflon coated cookware. It's fucking incredible how after two years, I still catch my fucking girlfriend doing this shit. Every woman I've ever met has the same problem, from roommates' girlfriends to my fucking mother. It's like every single one of them becomes absolutely fucking brain dead as soon as they come within 3 feet of any amount of teflon.

[Anonymous No.8888737]

>>8888671
Already posted, Jonny come lately.

[Anonymous No.8888745]

>>8888737
Quote the post that said that before me.

[Anonymous No.8888762]

>>8882538
My mom always, always uses metal implements in her nonstick pans. After a while they aren't anything like nonstick anymore, but she keeps using them. One time I tried making scrambled eggs in one of her pans -- the entire thing was coated in crusted-on egg by the time I was done. I had to soak it to get it clean.

[Anonymous No.8888984]

>>8888403
>>8888422
>>8888516
because birds don't react to their owners screaming and running around you fucking idiots

[Anonymous No.8889001]

>>8882568
That's just pathetic man, no other way to put it.

[Anonymous No.8889018]

>>8888984
are you suggesting that one can wake up to a house being mace?
maybe sir you are the idiot here

[Anonymous No.8889038]

>>8889018
considering my brother's godmother woke up when she went blind due to a clot in her brains, yeah I think you can wake up if there's capsaicin in the air.
I have also woken up to the smell of my cat's shit

[Anonymous No.8889053]

>>8889001
>No other way to put it
I think you'll find it's erotic. Not everyone is plain like you sitting in a chair upright with your pump hand cream and man sized tissues jerking it to blonde Hollywood type "lesbians" licking each others snatches. Norman.

[Anonymous No.8889060]

>>8886941
>Eventually my poor sweet grandma who was living with us at the time cleaned it out.
Your grandma should've just thrown the fucking thing in the trash.

[Anonymous No.8889067]

>tfw tried to make a waffle but forgot to lube waffle iron
>waffle encrusted into it
>picked it out with a butter knife

s-sorry

[Anonymous No.8889068]

12 packets of noodles seasoned with an entire tub of butter.

[Anonymous No.8889076]

>>8885610
lol

[Anonymous No.8889086]

>>8889053
>Not everyone is plain like you
>mfw guro/vore fetish
How the fuck am I plain

[Anonymous No.8889100]

>>8888745

Here

>>8882568

[Anonymous No.8889117]

>>8889086
Sorry, you're actually a plain 12 year old who thinks he's edgy by wanking off to cartoons with blood in them.

[Anonymous No.8889254]

>>8889117
>>8889086
You're both degenerate.

[Anonymous No.8889267]

>>8887840

it has been said elsewhere in this thread already, but soap won't remove a proper layer of polymerized fat in a well seasoned cast iron skillet.

you are mad over nothing, and your seasoning job was probably shit anyway

[Anonymous No.8889287]

>>8882386
I'm so fucking tired of my roommates leaving their dirty pots and dishes all over the sink. I've asked them a few times NOT to but they do it anyways. And the worst part is that they always go back to their hometown over the weekend and leave their shit sitting around even longer.

Probably bothers nobody because I clean up my own dishes and pots and pans, only because if I didn't they'd probably use it and fuck that

[Anonymous No.8889293]

>>8884067
Ahahahahahahahaha

[Anonymous No.8889300]

>>8886705
That isn't an issue
Why are you on ck

[Anonymous No.8889307]

>>8889060
You don't understand humans, do you

[Anonymous No.8889342]

>>8886998
just fucking put it in a container in your fridge then, takes 2 minutes, instead of ruining a pot i swear to god some of you people are so petty youd rather let people ruin your shit than lift a single finger

[Anonymous No.8889376]

>>8887194
Clean and dry them after using them, store them on your desktop

[Anonymous No.8889390]

>>8888888

[Anonymous No.8889681]

>>8888037
feta dude? It's a staple of so many salads. Plus things like halloumi, ricotta etc are really populat

[Anonymous No.8889709]

>>8883462
hahaha my roommate leaves all kind of shit on top of the toaster oven while using it, i always have to walk by after he leaves the kitchen to move stuff off it. no matter how many times ive told him he doesnt learn. what was formerly a white surface has all kinds of coloured shit from packaging melted into it now

i also have to turn the oven and sometimes stove off

[Anonymous No.8889722]

>Always wash non-stick pans and utensils
>Keep wooden utensils inside cupboard where non-stick pans are to avoid looking for them
>Fridge has weight distributed proportionately since the holds are broken (it's a really old fridge my uncle gave me)
>Mother convinces me to let her house-sit while I go stay a couple nights out of town
>Brings nephew who's about my age
>Explain to both of them what to and not to do to wreck my shit
>Write it down and stick it on the fridge

>Two weeks later I arrive back home to find wooden utensils bloated and spongy in the sink half full with soapy, dirty water
>Pans are all scratched to shit. One of them, with the burnt remains of whatever happened to fall on it, outside of the sink because "they were going to use it again"
>Pot has been turned into a fungus farm
>Fridge's holds have fallen and whatever was on them that they didn't eat was left there to spill
>There's pizza boxes and takeout just crammed anywhere that fit
>Plus, they drank all my alcohol and complained that the "wine" I had was too shitty. It was regular grape juice, it even said so on the bottle: 'non-alcoholic wine'.
>Point out all the shit they did to my stuff and they just respond with "Well, just buy new ones."
>Can't be bothered to get mad, tell them to pack their stuff up and go home
>They still ask if I'm not going to cook something for them before they go

Needless to say, my autism doesn't run in the family.

[Anonymous No.8890499]

>>8889018
have you ever cooked hot peppers on the stove?
it can get pretty fucking intense m8. I can see it spicing up a whole house especially if you're making a large batch for canning as jam

[Anonymous No.8890571]

Use my brand new Chemex as a flower pot.

[Anonymous No.8890652]

>>8882386
Complained his medium rare steak was raw and proceeded to turn it into charcoal and tell me and everyone else I can't cook.

I have a reputation with a lot of people I know that I'm incompetent and I have no reason why. I've fixed his TV, Speakers, toilet and cook because he's a fast food fag.

Would probably starve if his room mate didn't like cooking too.

Does anyone else have this problem?

[Anonymous No.8890711]

>>8887252
Literally the only reason anyone composts is to feed a plant or plants they're growing.

[Anonymous No.8890778]

When I was in HS my parents went away for the weekend and left my sister, who was in college, in charge of me and the house.
She had a party, got drunk and passed out.
Her boyfriend decided it would be funny to microwave some puke, then added a turd that was in the toilet, put it in for 5 minutes on high.
Stunk up the house bad.
That was so funny he takes my mother's Calphalon skillet and has a couple of the guys crap into the pan so he can fry it up.
While that was frying away, in olive oil, most of the girls took turns pissing in a sauce pot and he set it on the stove to boil.
After some puking he tossed all the shit on the wall and ceiling of the kitchen and poured the boiling piss onto my parents bed.
My sister tried to blame me, my mother said she was lying because I was too stupid to think up something like that.

[Anonymous No.8890813]

>>8890778
What the fuck kind of fucked up people do you and your family associate with. I would have beat the shit outta that kid

[Anonymous No.8890816]

>>8890778
Good fucking lord, WHY

[Anonymous No.8890832]

>>8890778
>I was too stupid to think up something like that
lel

[Anonymous No.8890861]

>>8890778
thats my fetish

[Anonymous No.8890882]

>>8890778
did you kill him or at least burn his house down in revenge?

[Anonymous No.8890894]

>>8890652
sound like you're a '60s housewife.
do you take it up the arse when its his birthday, too?
why not just tell him to go fuck himself instead?

[Anonymous No.8890913]

>>8882386
my roomate makes the worst 'chili' of all times. i's LITERALLY canned chopped tomatoes with kidney beans brought to a boil.
not even salt because high sodium is not good for you and superior people have adjusted their taste for smaller sodium contents.

sometimes in the kitchen i notice his dinner in prep lonely sizzling away on the stove which consists of some frozen rice dish heating up in a large pan with a salmon filet on top.

also for some reasons he doesnt use plates but eats everything out of cereal bowls. wtf

[Anonymous No.8890915]

>>8890816
>believing a post like this

anon.

[Anonymous No.8890924]

>>8883966
what's wrong with this?

[Anonymous No.8890933]

JUUUST

[Anonymous No.8891022]

>>8890894
Sounds hot

[Anonymous No.8891025]

>>8884067
>Can't a knicker get a lap dance?

[Anonymous No.8891035]

>>8886532
>I'm never, ever going to tell you what to do again.
>I'm not going to help you with anything ever again
>because you didn't like me bossing you around in the kitchen

Great communication and social skills anon! You sound like a pleasure to be around, not controlling or manipulative at all. Good luck bb

[Anonymous No.8891043]

>>8886648
holy fuck what an entitled asshole.

[Anonymous No.8891048]

>>8882386
>leave for a week
>come back
>awful smell in the kitchen
>pots everywhere
>one still on the stove
>check inside
>hamburger helper swarming with maggots
>has likely been left for days since he wasn't there

God fucking dammit I was so mad, we couldn't get rid of the bugs for the rest of that lease.

[Anonymous No.8891250]

>>8887817
>meat goes rancid in just a few hours

anon pls

[Anonymous No.8891392]

>>8888660
Jesus Christ I was thinking the same thing

[Anonymous No.8891432]

>>8888403
Doesn't effect there taste buds, still burns exposed mucus membranes like their fucking eyes.

[Anonymous No.8891446]

>>8891250
>a few hours
>ALL DAY
8 to 12 hours or more is not "a few"

[Anonymous No.8891467]

>>8891432
>"No--the ethmoid branch of the trigeminal nerve innervates the eyes, nose, and oral cavity. This is the nerve responsible for mediation of chemical irritation. There is no evidence that birds code capsaicin (red pepper) as an irritant at concentrations as high as 20,000 ppm (the hottest chili is about 2,000 ppm). Mammals like squirrels (rats, mice) reject capsicum concentrations as low as 1-10 ppm." In other words, birds are insensitive to red pepper, period. They could be irritated by excessive dust, however. Robert H. Schmidt, Associate Professor, Dept. of Fisheries and Wildlife, Utah State University."

hmm, really gets the old fraud story nogging wagging
my man you got busted, sorry not sorry

[Anonymous No.8891528]

>>8882393
molasses for non UK fags

[Anonymous No.8891599]

Roommate used brown scotchbrite I used for metal prepping to scrub my alclad pan. Literally every inch, even the fucking handle. Looked like someone took a wire brush to it. Made him buy me a new one and I just polished the one he fucked up so overall maybe not that bad.

[Anonymous No.8891756]

>>8891432
Why make shit up? You never learn anything if you pretend to know stuff. They just don't have a receptor for it. Not like Capsaicin is acid or something that actually burns.

[Anonymous No.8891800]

G/f at time, now ex wife asked me if I'd like a grilled cheese. Sure. Then proceeds to put 2 pieces of bread in toaster. When it popped up she then slapped 2 slices of cheese on it and through it in microwave. I should have known she wouldn't last.

[Anonymous No.8891801]

Kitchen at work, the cooker is an induction hob, not gas. No one has the patience to wait for them to heat up before sticking stuff in, so things tend to not cook evenly. One day I spot this crazy ginger goblin lady(no one complains about her because she's just too damn entertaining) putting her hand FLAT ON THE HOB to see if it's hot enough yet. Mansplain to her that it's dangerous and pointless because she didn't have her pan already on the hob and that will also take a while to heat up. I put her pan on, pour a drop of water out the kettle in and tell her that when it evaporates she will know the pan is hot enough to start doing her omelette. A few weeks later I see her pour some water in her pan and assume she's taken my tip to heart, but then she throws some veg in and cracks some eggs over them. I asked her why she didn't wait for the water to evaporate and she just looked at me for a long pause before saying she thought she could make her omelette using water like it was oil.

[Anonymous No.8891846]

>>8888888

[Anonymous No.8891947]

>>8891800
I do this if I'm incredibly lazy and don't want to dirty anything. I'd never offer it to someone else though.

[Anonymous No.8891954]

>>8886072
This post is old, but I just wanted to say, as someone who takes things in the pooper, there is still no excuse. I don't get shit anywhere but in the bowl.

[Anonymous No.8892099]

>>8890778
I love stories like these. Not cooking related, but:
>I was at a friends house party and had to use their toilet.
>The only toilet available also happened to be in the bathroom, and there were some cheap shelves at the foot of the bathtub with various products.
>There were two full bottles of hair removal cream on the shelves, so I poured them both into the expensive bottles of shampoo and conditioner.
>I caught up with them a week later and they'd lost all their hair.

[Anonymous No.8892111]

>>8892099
pretty /impish/

[Anonymous No.8892123]

>>8892099
>The only toilet available was in the bathroom

Indeed.

[Anonymous No.8892134]

>>8892123
Why is this so funny