/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>39400731
playing.

Kogasa saw a certain gloomy witch and her devil servant with wings on her head from the bushes. Grinning to herself, she saw a good opportunity to practice her Terrifying Surprise Killing Technique (which she was devising to use on humans). Though Patchouli wasn't exactly a normal human, Kogasa thought her shut-in personality would work in her favor.

"Aaah Kaokuma It's sooo hot. Why do we have to come all the way out here." The witch moaned as she walked (but it was really more of a stagger).

She was supporting herself on a staff, while her servant walked leisurely beside her. It would have been poor form for the servant to walk in front of the master.

"Don't worry master. We are almost there."

"Damn that Sakuya, sending all the way out here just for one lousy ingredient. The sun...it hurts. At this rate I'm going to get a sunburn."

As if she just answered her own concern, she stopped for a moment, chanted something, and a small storm cloud appeared over her head to shade her.

"fufufu now you look even more depressed than usual master"

Patchouli only grumbled. Up ahead Kogasa had been waiting in ambush. She was crouched behind a tree and holding her closed umbrella as if it were a weapon. As Patchouli and Kaokuma approached Kogasa jumped out.

"Bero bero BA!!"

She cried out, unfurling her umbrella in the same moment, which licked Patchouli's whole face and left it dripping.

"Ah! w-what the hell!" Parchouli staggered backwards. "T-this is why I hate leaving the library! You damn useless umbrella...I told you the last time, you aren't scary and your surprises are--" Patchouli had gotten worked up and need to pause to cough. " --mere annoyances!" Her face twitched as she wiped the saliva off her face. "Kaokuma! Use you devil powers on her!" She pointed at Kogasa melodramatically.

Koakuma had up until now been stifling a laugh with her hand, but she openly let out a giggle and her wings waved up and down. "ufufufu no way Master! I couldn't hurt such a cutie."

"Useless..."

Patchouli caused her storm cloud to move over Kogasa's head, which began emitting a miniature typhoon. But Kogasa merely blocked it with her umbrella and stuck out her tongue.

"Beeeeh!"

Patchouli's forehead vain was visibly varicosed.

"You damn brat..."

Suddenly with a great crack and flash lightning struck Kogasa's umbrella. It's pupil rolled up and its tongue hung limp. It might have even been smoking.

"Ow! Now you've done it, you shut in witch! NEET! Fatty!"

"I'll have you know I spend each day doing intensive magical resear-- Fatty?! Who are you calling a fatty?? At least i'm not a little washboard like you!"

"If my boobs came from eating junkfood I wouldn't want em!"

"My, my" Kaokuma was still holding back her laugher.

Kogasa had taken several steps forward and rolled her sleeves up. Yet, standing directly in front of the taller Patchouli she became visibly flustered at the confrontation.

"Y-you smelly witch. W-when was the last time you took a shower."

"Oh look, the tiny-tits umbrella girl is scared of the great Patchouli. This is why you'll never surprise anyone."

"S-shut up! If I was built like you I could just sit on them and the smell alone would kill them!"

"I told you I'm not fat! This is just my body type!"

"Fatty!"

"Washboard!"

"P-p-pigchouli!"

"N-now you've gone to far!"

Taking a step back, Patchouli began chanting a spell, but because getting so worked up had aggravated her asthma she ran out of breath. Seizing the opportunity, Kogasa grabbed Patchouli's sleeve, and with strong muscles from blacksmithing, dropped her body and used Patchouli's greater weight to slam her into the ground with far more force than might have been expected from the smaller youkai. Patchouli was out cold.

"M-master??" Koakuma shook her shoulders, looking a little concerned now.

"Hmph. Serves you right for saying i'm not scary."

Picking up her umbrella, and turning around she walked away.

"T-they're not even that small..."

After a time Patchouli woke up

"Uwaaa~ Koakumaaa" She was crying. "My body hurts..."
Kaokuma easily picked up Patchouli's limp form, who moaned the whole time, and put her over her shoulder

"There, there master"

"Kaokuma...I'm not fat am I?

"Well..."

And as if all the life came back into her Patchouli shouted, pounding on Koakuma's back, "You shitty servant! Insolent devil! When we get back i'm gonna banish you!"

She yelled until she was out breath, and by the time they got back she was fast asleep. Coming to check on her, Sakuya and Hong heard her say while sleeping "I'm not fat...stupid...tiny tits...useless...umbrella"

>>33748507
Maybe.

>>30369699
Flabchy for me.

>>23116490
Pig witch only play games and read everyday