/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>29525070
she's basically gondola

>>29288022
Is Sora basically a Minecraft Gondola?

if my oshi ever knew how much I'd looked at her roommate accounts or what I say about her here she'd probably hate me and think I'm a disgusting otaku
even if not, she'd never be attracted to me. japanese people are attracted to japanese people.
and I'd never meet her. the odds are astronomical.
despite all that, still all I want is to hear her say she loves me. whisper in my ear in a language I hardly understand any of. talk about books i've never read or make offhand reference to some cultural touchstone I don't know because we grew up so disparately. she could talk about anything, i find her fascinating
I want to learn more japanese to understand more of what she says. the biggest mental hurdle so far has been thinking of it like how most people learn a language for economic reasons or for self-improvement. but i'm fine financially. I have a professional degree and even a girlfriend of some years. I've been to japan myself a few times.
i don't think I can improve. i think i'm pretty well broken. but my oshi, it's like there was this pain that was there all along, and she makes that pain go away. but now I can't help but notice when it comes back. like an air conditioner you've tuned out over months or years and suddenly one day it shuts off.
I wonder what it is about her specifically. i only got into this because i like lets plays and weeb shit.