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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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12611605 No.12611605 [Reply] [Original]

Things Touhou characters would never say.

"The Scarlet Devil library is now open to the public!" -Patchouli Knowledge

>> No.12611612 [DELETED] 

"You're a faggot." -Your favorite 2hu

>> No.12611621

>>12611605
I think it'd be more like, "Marisa, take any book you want on my behalf."

>> No.12611623

They aren't real.

>> No.12611625

>>12611623
Yeah they are, they live in the transdimensional pocket universe created by the Hiroshima bombing.

>> No.12611630

>>12611605
"ZdbrraughdeeeaaaAAAAAfhde" -Nitori Kawashiro

>> No.12611637

"Limbo has collapsed into the real world. What was once hidden is now laid bare for all to see. Revolution is in the air." - Eirin Yagakoro

>> No.12611648

>>12611625
They live on my dick and they say you should suck it.

>> No.12611649

It's like I'm actually on an anime forum.

>> No.12611650

"Anger and violence can never destroy evil, only understandingness can!" -Reimu Hakurei

>> No.12611654
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12611654

"There's no root password!"

The assistant system administrator of the Scarlet Devil Mainframe.

>> No.12611736

"I don't put out on the first date." -Sanae

>> No.12611739
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12611739

"I won't suck it." -Sakuslut Izayoi

>> No.12611785

"I'm so rich" -Reimu Hakurei

>> No.12611821

>"The Scarlet Devil library is now open to the public!"
Pertinent knowledge: Pache isn't just the librarian, she IS the library.

>> No.12611827
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12611827

This spell works nowise!

>> No.12611866

>>12611821
>Patchouli gangbang
>stand in line for two hours, hnnng this is gonna be awesome
>get to the front of the line
>forgot your library card
>run home real fast and get it
>by the time you get back in line, the gangbang is already over and she only has them once every 50 years
>the next day everyone is talking about how awesome it was, and lolling at you for missing it

>> No.12611905 [DELETED] 

>>12611866
Who are you quoting?

>> No.12611918

>>12611905
Aya Sheimamaru at last weekend's slam poetry night. She wasn't as good a slam poet as Marisa, but she gave her a run for her money.

>> No.12611922

>>12611905
Yesterday's event. You missed it?

>> No.12611961

>>12611918
>>12611922
Hmm, conflicting sources.

>> No.12611977

>>12611961
yesterday was last weekend faglord

>> No.12611986

>>12611961
Patchouli gangbang was Saturday, slam poetry event was on Sunday and Aya wrote a poem about it. Bam, conflict resolved.

>> No.12612027
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12612027

WELCOME TO DIE.

>> No.12612444

"I love you!" -Your favorite 2hu

>> No.12612483 [SPOILER] 
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12612483

"I don't want to marry Rinnosuke." - Anonymous Perfect Maid

>> No.12612493

>>12611986
So Aya was there?
Was it a futa gang-bang?

>> No.12612522

>>12612444
Ouch, dude.

>> No.12612537

>>12611605
"I couldn't possibly fit another dick in there" - Sanae

>> No.12612538

>>12612493
Course it was. We're all little girls with not-so-little penises in here.

>> No.12612549

"i am not a slut" -sakuslut

>> No.12614077

>>12612493
She was a fluffer.

>> No.12614141

"Now we can fight as warriors! Hand to hand! It is the basis of all combat! Only a fool trusts his life to a weapon! " - Youmu Konpaku

>> No.12614169

"This time I will keep a promise and follow this diet!"- Fatchouli

>> No.12614177

"I'm back bitches!"- Mima

>> No.12614221
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12614221

"I'm not a lonely girl"

>> No.12614229

>>12614177
;_; my bones

>> No.12614304

>>12614177
one day

>> No.12614304,1 [INTERNAL] 

Man, this thread is hella epic

>> No.12614343

"Im not a slut" - Sanae Kotiya

>> No.12614343,1 [INTERNAL] 

I've always figured that this whore was sparkgay.

>> No.12614362

"Stand aside, m'Lady" - Marisa Kirisame

>> No.12614369
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12614369

>>12614221
Well, she have pets and her sister.

>> No.12614442

"I am unable to handle that many cocks."
-Sakuya Izayoi

>> No.12614501

>>12614442
"I can handle them no problem."
-Sanae Kochiya

>> No.12614520

>>12614442
>>12614501
sakuslut confirmed for biggest slut, never backs down from a dick.

>> No.12614538

>>12611605
"The Pubic Library of Sakuya is now closed!" -Sakuya Izayoi

>> No.12614543

"I don't wanna kill you!" - Literally everybody

>> No.12614562
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12614562

>>12614543
As opposed to what, figuratively everyone?

>> No.12614566

>>12614562
as opposed to illiterally everyone, so he's only talking about the people that can read.

>> No.12614571
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12614571

"I'm not going to eat you!" - Kisume

>> No.12614572

>>12611654
"I love maintaining old COBOL applications!"

The legacy code maintainers for the applications running on the Scarlet Devil Mainframe.

>> No.12614573
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12614573

>>12614566
Seriously?

>> No.12614597

"Sorry I forgot how to grow a dick today" -Sakuya Izayoi

>> No.12614610
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12614610

"Sleep is for the weak."

>> No.12614629

>>12614597
"But I remember." -Sanae Kochiya

>> No.12614674
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12614674

>>12614538
>Pubic Library

>> No.12614674,1 [INTERNAL] 

neo-neo-neo-W will call this thread "the classic days"

>> No.12614674,2 [INTERNAL] 

there was some gross fat old lady from wisconsin on the price is right the other day and her name was marisa

>> No.12614674,3 [INTERNAL] 

ye olden days

>> No.12614674,4 [INTERNAL] 

kill me

>> No.12618925

>>12614442
>>12614501
You're right, they wouldn't say those things, because they would never be in a situation where it's necessary to say it.

>> No.12618944
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12618944

>>12611605
"I feel like getting bronzed! Beach day?"

>> No.12624672
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12624672

Eat some bunnies will ya?
They iz proteinz!

>> No.12624684

"This thread is great!" - ur favorit 2hu

>> No.12624685

Let's have sex

-all touhous

>> No.12631852
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12631852

>>12611654
>>12614572
is /gjp/ a thing?

>> No.12631921

"I love you Anon" - every 2hu ever

>> No.12632100

>>12611654
mate don't even joke about that stuff. I swear I will punch the next retard who doesn't provide a root password and then complains their systems are not secure.

>> No.12632109

>>12614572
"Assembly language is so much more efficient, it's just worth the effort!"

>> No.12632579

"I drive" -- Cirno

>> No.12633086

"You know, I feel like I've stolen enough."

- Marisa Kirisame.

>> No.12633416

>>12611654
>>12632100
There's no root password because you can't log in as root.

>> No.12633520

Sanaefags and Sakuyafags are truly the worse

>> No.12633621

>>12633520
Will these slut fights ever end?

Will there ever be peace in Gensokyo's sex life?

>> No.12633857

>>12611605
"I think I have enough donation for today" -- Reimu

>> No.12635006

"I did not sleep with ZUN to get my games !" Aya.

>> No.12635036
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12635036

"My AA meeting is scheduled for tomorrow." - Suika Ibuki

>> No.12635126

>>12611866

Everyone also has herpes. Yokai herpes.

>> No.12635188

"I'm not the worst sister" Flandre scarlet

>> No.12635204

>>12635188
Fuck you

>> No.12635257
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12635257

"Seconds? No thank you, I've had quite enough food." - Yuyuko Saigyouji

>> No.12635285
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12635285

"I'm not getting paid enough."
- Kyouko Kasodani

>> No.12635387

"I don't like being spanked." -Tenshi Hinanawi.

>> No.12635387,1 [INTERNAL] 

>>12618944
>getting bronzed
u literally wot

>> No.12635387,2 [INTERNAL] 

Can you imagine being like one of these brainless dweebs?

>> No.12635387,3 [INTERNAL] 

is this thread ironic

i dont even

>> No.12637796

"Some say death is the end... but I say it is but the beginning."

-Kaguya Houraisan

>> No.12637859

>>12637796
But she has died, by giving up her mortality.

>> No.12637859,1 [INTERNAL] 

If I were a janitor things would be different around here...

>> No.12638202 [DELETED] 

>>12637859,1
If you were the janitor youd have to lose 50kg as janitors have to be 200kg

>> No.12638202,1 [INTERNAL] 

>>12638202
omg he posted it on the real /jp/

>> No.12638202,2 [INTERNAL] 

>>12638202,1
Literally O. M. G.

OMG
M
G

LITERALLY

>> No.12638202,3 [INTERNAL] 

>>12638202
I'd have to gain 150kg...

>> No.12638202,4 [INTERNAL] 

>>12638202,2
Oh my g-d.............,,.

>> No.12638232 [DELETED] 

>>12638202
nice trashcan LFMAO

>> No.12638477

"i'm still alive and relevant"

>> No.12638499

>>12638477
Not sure who you might be quoting here, chap.

>>
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