/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>14248294
Holy shit you're a retard OP

>>14248294
Tell me more about this magnificent creature.

>go to the bathroom
>thread dies when I come back
>this guy rushes it and fucks up the OP

O-okay...

>>14248294
Good job there OP.

OP if you're out there I hope you seriously consider killing yourself. People like you are cancer who should an hero.

God damn it OP.

I want to go fishing with a Harpy!

>Putting the title in the name field
First day here?

And now OP pretends he doesn't exist. Fuck you OP, never make a thread again.

Is this still the loli thread?
Or is this a thread for new things? Like monstergirl twins?

>>14248294
I remember a time back on /a/ when I put the subject in the name field.

Yeah yeah, what's done is done, we're not making another one are we? Now let's discuss monstergirls doing what they do best.

>>14248294
Once again, OP is a faggot.

Well, traditions are important I guess.

>OP in charge of being retarded

Gee what a suprise

>>14248319
>Like monstergirl twins?
>tfw still trying to figure out a way to do yandere twins

>>14248327
>OP doing damage control
I wish this board had IDs, I really do. That way we could at least heckle and chase off OP for a thread.

What happens in /hbg/ when someone fucks up the OP?

>>14248319
No this is the Manticore thread.

>>14248341
Manticores are rude!

Very rude!

>>14248334
>>14248327
>>14248294
Afraid not faggot.

>>14248341
mofu cup

>>14248300
I was one press of a button away from posting a REAL OP too. Fuck me.

>>14248338
They ask if OP's husband was ploughing her from behind as she made the thread.

>>14248327

Nice try OP

But I visited /pol/ enough before we had IDs to know when someone is sliding

>Actual image of OP

OP here. Sorry I fucked up. I will now commit sudoku.

>>14248341
why not Manticore twins?
you're going to need two dicks

>>14248350
Don't associate alps with the OP.

They didn't fuck their OPs up.

>>14248334
>>14248349

>>14248321
Me too anon. Me too.

OP is still a faggot though. I can be a hypocrite if I want.

This is the Wendigos in spats thread

I want to catch a Sabbath witch and put her on the stocks in my bedroom to gently irrumate and deflower!

>>14248341
>you will never line your den with the pelts of manticores

>>14248353
Hey, that's pretty good, I like it. Continue.

Come on guys, it's not that big of a deal. Oh boo hoo, I bet you guys have fumbled with a thread before, now talk about monster girls already

>>14248371
Honestly, if I had a girl in this position I'd start throwing raw, cold bacon on her buttcheeks to see if they stick.

>>14248368
How do they put spats on with their tails.

>>14248355
Two Manticore twins.
The first got her sister's share of breasts and is a complete titty monster while also being a bit of an airhead who likes spoiling the man. The second is a selfish and flat chested, playing more into the traditional Manticore role while also being jealous of her sister.

I want them both.

>>14248380
With a hole in the spats, and someone to help them get their tail through it.

>>14248363

Sure thing

>>14248385
Hey, that's pretty good, I like it. Continue.

>>14248380
They don't, they wear them on their heads.

>>14248385
>>14248388
Nip this in the bud now.

This is the greatest thread we've had in weeks.

>>14248377
Twice in fact.

You're at the edge of the river, fishing for your next meal. You've been on the journey to the village to the west, that you suspect will be around the riverbend. However, right now, you're looking in particular for a meal to fill your empty stomach. You finally get a pull, and you reel it in, however, what surfaces is an odd but cute girl shouting "owwowowow"
Continue? Y/N

>>14248399
This is the worst thing I've ever read.

Keep going.

>>14248294
OP, you dumb faggot.

>>14248399
Hey, that's pretty good, I like it. Continue.

>>14248399
N

>>14248399
What was the question?

>>14248386
Oh yeah, this is real convincing. Especially when we've had this little game in the thread before. Hope you got your yuks.

I just wanted to talk about cute custom made lolis. Fuck you guys, that's the last time I make a thread. I just wanted to help.

>>14248421
GET FUCKED RETARD

DON'T BE SHIT NEXT TIME FAGGOT

>>14248319
This is a loli thread!

Oh for gods sake.

>>14248348
>implying such a retard has a husband

In all seriousness, though, do you think the actual Writefag-kun will come back at some point? Or rather, post stuff in the threads with his name?

Do you feel bad for him? A sense of schadenfreude?

>>14248428
Name.
Now.

>>14248433
>Writefag-kun
Who?

Did this happen because i shared with you guys that i had a Dream about a Bapho-size young dragon that was after me?

>>14248413

We have?

>>14248433
>feel bad
Never paid much attention to him. What happened?

>>14248435
http://nhentai.net/g/136383/

>>14248405
Fag.

>>14248421
Interesting trip

>>14248389
Is something wrong? I'm seeing a pair of spats and a fur coat make muffled awawa noises over there

>>14248442
Much obliged.

>>14248384
I want to fuck the flat one lovingly and tenderly while her sister holds her in a full nelson and says encouraging things to her.
I want to make her feel loved.

>>14248439
>Bapho-sized Dragon
Want. Much want.

>>14248433
He fucked up once, not the big thing. I don't feel bad for him but I don't mind if he comes back.

>>14248452
Would her sister whisper words of encouragement in your ear from behind and make lewd comments about her sister to fuel your desire?

>>14248439
>i had a Dream about a Bapho-size young dragon that was after me?
I'd rather not know about the dream, but I do like the thought of a loli Dragon.

In a Monster Girl tavern, what girl there would you go for? Or rather, what girl would go for you?

>>14248475
She was a chill Dragon, very comfortable to be around

>>14248355
>Manticore twins
Fuck off.

>>14248428
Me on the right.

>>14248484
Bollocks wrote some decent smut about them.

>>14248479
I have no idea.

>>14248428
>Henreader

Why are you doing this to me, Anon?

>>14248479
Hopefully a nice CC.

>>14248479
her, or a Jinko

>>14248479
That's the fun on getting drunk in the tavern ain't it?

>>14248488
A) Wrong Thread
B) There are three on the right, three on the left, and two in the middle.

>>14248282
Continuity of consciousness isn't the only consideration. What difference does it make if you become a being with a completely different set of values and worldview by instantaneous magic button-press or by a slow, gradual process? The end result is still a creature entirely divorced from your original self, sharing only your memories. Isn't that a form of death?

>>14248479
But alcohol is bad.

>>14248479
I want to be a bishie in a biker bar surrounded by big scary monstergirls!

>>14248506
Why're we talking about SOMA again?

>>14248513
The Oni of disproval looks in your direction.

>>14248514
>biker bar
I want to ride a Frisco chopper into a biker bar full of scary biker monster girls!

i want to get a buttjob from twins as they face ass to ass and grind up and down on my dick

>>14248516
I'm sorry, I only read these threads once every couple of weeks while I'm checking for writefag updates. I don't know what SOMA is.

>>14248479
I want to drink with the group of Goblins who frequent the tavern and drink themselves silly after a hard day's work. Buying a round or two for them doesn't seem like a bad idea.

The question is what kind of drink do you think they'd prefer? Obviously some kind of ale but would Goblins go for lighter stuff or something dark and malty?

>>14248516
We've had this discussion a few times before SOMA ever came out, as it turns out.
Though if the game includes that as a theme, then I guess mroe people will be talking about that concept. It's pretty relevant to MGE, after all.

@14248500

>>14248506
You could say the same thing about someone who changes their values and beliefs over time as they grow up or learn about a subject though.

What of someone who was raised in an extremely religious household who becomes agnostic as their life experiences shape them, or an atheist who gains at least pseudo-religious beliefs after going to war and witnessing enough close calls and "miracles" to shake their conviction about the absence of a deity? Would you call changes like that a form of death?

>>14248524
A video game which deals primarily with exactly what you were talking about.

>>14248519
Does this truly look like a face of disapproval?

>>14248380
I still want more pics of CC Wendigo

>>14248536
That's the only one there is.

>>14248528
Yes, I know. It's just that now that the game is out, and deals with exactly that (Seriously, even the exact same language), it's hard not to note it.

>>14248479
I want the tubby Jabberwock Bar Maiden to take me into the back and let me sample the wares even though I told her I've never drinken before!

>>14248529

>>14248489
Double the fuck off, then.

>>14248526
Wychwood Brewery over in the Motherland has a bangin' dark amber ale called King Goblin. Kind of fruity over malty but it's something I'd expect a band of Goblins to quaff in great quantities while Hobgoblin boss sits in Anon's lap eating a parfait

>>14248473
No, she'd whisper teasing things into her sister's ears about how much she's enjoying being pampered and how deep down she loves me.
This will continue until she breaks down and admits her feelings before wrapping her arms around me and stealing a kiss.
What's the point of Tsunderes if they never go dere?

>>14248500
The rightmost one. With the ribbons in the tail.

Actually, I just want to take a second to point out how much I like the idea of ribbons in tails.

>>14248539
I know, that's why I brought it up.

>Not fighting crab girls with crab crackers
>Not bringing a side of butter.

>>14248547
>Wychwood Brewery
Huh I should have thought of them, used to drink Hobgoblin all the time.
>That spoiler
Cute/10, would buy her a glass of orange juice.

>>14248531
It's clear that identity isn't static and sense of self changes over time. However, there seems to be a marked difference in changes to "what you believe about the physical facts of the world", e.g. there is/isn't a god, the planet does/doesn't orbit the sun, etc. and changes to "what you believe about the metaphysical facts of the world," e.g. what is good is what a virtuous person does/what is good is what brings the greatest happiness to the greatest number, positive knowledge about the world is/isn't possible, etc. The former is a change in what you're looking at, while the latter is a change in how you go about looking. I'd contend that a change to the latter has a much more radical impact on a person's identity than a change to the former, and that while the former is expected to change for everyone simply in the process of learning new things changes to the latter are experienced as life-changing events.

Monsterization/incubization seems to be almost entirely a change of the second sort, and I'm leery of even putting it in the same category as the sort of change you're talking about.

>>14248532
I see. Thank you.

>>14248479
I would be unlikely to go to a tavern at all. I'd sit at a table in the corner if I did go.

>>14248479
One would probably like me if they like their targets meaty and slow.
I don't want to be eated.

still sitting here, anons?

>>14248534
I think her face says is this faggot serious?

>>14248582
Always, for reasons that are unknown even to me.

>>14248582
Yes, but my stump is on wheels

>>14248586
She looks inebriated.

>>14248558
>>14248558
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZ35SOU9HTM
>Goblins singing this
>Furbait getting flustered and leaving

>>14248428
Too short. This is what heaven must be like.

>>14248582
She'll come for me one day, I know it.

>>14248573
Would you want monstergirls to see you sitting in the corner and try to hit on you?

>>14248294
So anon. how much of a hassle would it be to take your sick MG to the doctor's office?

>>14248598
I wonder how long it would take the bartender to tell them they've clearly had enough, although he'd probably blame anon for buying them those extra rounds rather than get on the bad side of a gang of Goblins.

>"Hiss!"

>>14248582
I guess we're here forever, uh?

>>14248611
I would. Oni's would be all over me, noticing that I hadn't touched my glass of Baileys for the past 20 minutes.

>>14248617
>Run
When there is 1 red ant there is somewhere in the hundreds of them.
And if they are like real ants, they are very temperamental.

>>14248617
>Have at least 5 red ant nests in my back garden
>Can't be bothered to get rid of them
If this was monster girl land I'd be in deep trouble right about now.

>>14248621
And don't you ever forget it.

>>14248631
You absolute madman.

>>14248582
just waiting for her to come back

>>14248615
>Bartender is just as cotton-mouthed as the Goblins saying shit like "Ach fer fook's sake what're ya doin' givin' all those wee ones a tird round ya divvut?"
>Anon's face when he doesn't understand a lick of it

>>14248621
Everyone's waiting for someone.

>>14248624
Would you want one to come over to you and ask what's wrong?

>>14248621
Eh, it's comfy.

>>14248631
The queen of each colony would be having wars with each other regularly. So with any luck they might just not notice you.

That, or they keep kidnapping/rescuing you from each other in an endless cycle.

>>14248617
>unzips Raid

Does anyone have the old daughteru greentext with all the "you will never"?

>>14248639
>Anon doesn't know what she's trying to say.
>Just gingerly pats her on the head and says: "Uh, yeah, totally..."

>>14248655
Figuratively literally every greentext ever.

What is the best body type and fruit flavor for a Barometz?

>>14248659
I mean the one that used to be posted a lot back on /a/

>>14248644
I don't think they'd even bother asking. Just chug the glass down and then off to the backroom.

>>14248593
Is that so wrong?

>>14248660
Fat-bottomed and with the refreshing and energizing taste of Powerade™!

>>14248660
>Fully figured
>I dunno I really like grape

>>14248489
If I wanted to read Manticore smut I'd just look at Seafoam or RS over a faglord

>>14248650
>Tired of fighting they decide on a system
>Each one has one week with anon on a continuous cycle
>Every sixth week they send representatives to a host nest to gang rape him and foster friendship between them

>>14248617
So would Red Ant girls be aggressive busty rapists?

>>14248661
Talking of the /a/ threads, I sort of miss zombie imouto.

>>14248655
>>14248661
>you will never have a lamia daughteru who curls around your arm and rests her head on your shoulder
>you will never have a centaur daughteru who can walk to you clumsily on the day she's born to hug you
>you will never have a harpy daughteru who attempts to fly but lands on her butt each time
>you will never have a spider girl daughteru who weaves a picture of you out of web
>you will never have a slime girl daughteru who covers you in her entire body as a hug
>you will never have a mantis girl daughteru who brings you whatever she hunts for your praise
>you will never have a cow girl daughter who you caress gently as she milks for the first time
>you will never have a lizard girl daughteru who you need to help peel off her old skin
>you will never have a cat girl daughteru who purrs whenever you hug her and pat her head
>you will never have a dog girl daughteru who just wants to rub against you
>you will never have a caterpillar daughteru cry and cling to you for a whole day because she needs to leave you for 7 months to become a Butterfly daughteru
>you will never have a dullihan daughteru who you break up fights between the head and body
>you will never have an allrune daughteru who smiles gently as she blooms and says she loves you for the care you've given her
>you will never have a vampire daughteru who you cut yourself to give her blood to ease her hunger for it
>You will never have a scylla daughteru who you need to change because she keeps inking her panties when afraid
>you will never have a kitsune daughteru who you help her brush her multiple tails
>you will never have a wyvern daughteru who you rub her upset stomach as she develops her dragon breath
>you will never have any monster girl daughteru

Do you mean this one? Because I know of one which I wrote, which isn't this one. But you probably meant this one.

>>14248672
>rape
>implying

Who literally wouldn't agree?

>>14248663
I'd like to think Oni are more considerate then that when it comes to a drinking environment.
>"Hey, what's wrong? That's good stuff and you haven't even touched it."

>>14248672
Pretty much, regular Ants are industrious workers, red ants are warriors.

>>14248675
Yeah, like this, but there was one much bigger.

>>14248675
>you will never have a centaur daughteru who can walk to you clumsily on the day she's born to hug you

Damn

For some reason that got me right in the feels

>>14248660
Tall, busty, hourglass, dat ass, killer thighs, hair flowing down to her back.

>>14248678
Maybe a blue oni.

>>14248685
Suffer more.

>>14248680
>You will never have a yuki-onna daughteru that just wants you to snuggle with her because she's always cold.
>You will never console your mermaid daughteru after she hits her head on the local pool's diving board.
>You will never have an elven daughteru to congratulate after her first perfect bullseye-shot on her archery class.
>You will never have a cyclops daughteru to take to the optometrist for a monocle fitting.
>You will never have a dragon daughteru who will always consider your love her greatest treasure.
>You will never have a zombie daughteru that needs of your sewing skills to keep her hand on it’s place.
>you will never have a kikimora daughteru who tries to help around the house with a bromm far too large for her
>you will never have a yeti daughteru who constantly clings to you with all the strength her little arms can muster
>you will never have a sandworm daughteru who tries to swallow you but can only ever fit you hand in her mouth
>you will never have a wurm daughteru who constantly breaks her toys because she doesn't know her own strength
>you will never have a sphinx daughteru who always asks you the same riddle and you sometimes answer incorrectly to make her feel better
>you will never have a weresheep daughteru who cuddles up to your face when you go to bed
>you will never have an oomukade daughteru who is to scared to show her face to others that she hides under you clothes
>you will never have a thunderbird daughteru who tries to zap you but ends up shocking herself
>you will never have a mimic daughteru to play peek-a-boo with
>you will never have a ryu daughteru who flies in circles around you
>you will never have a sahuagin daughteru who almost never says anything except for an occasional hushed "I love you daddy"

That's all I can find currently. Post 13158572, if you're wondering. Hope it helped.

>>14248677
I'm imagining they'd aggressively repel anyone who gets close to their hive until they find a man that suits their fancy.
Then they'd overwhelm him and drag him into their hive to their queen, the biggest and bustiest of them all.
Their stingers are filled with an aphrodisiac toxin that when injected into the body causes the victim to feel a burning lust that lets them keep going for hours on end. The Queen's variant is even more potent
If the queen approves of the man they choose, then all the Red Ant girls of the hive sting him with their venom and then gangbang him until every single one of them has had at least one turn.
After that he's kept as their beloved communal husband, and they'd fight tooth and nail to keep him safe and happy.

>>14248692
Thanks

>>14248688
I dunno man, there's something great about imagining a tough and boisterous Red Oni girl who's still a great listener.

>>14248675
>>14248692
>you will never have a lamia daughteru who curls around your arm and rests her head on your shoulder
>you will never have a vampire daughteru who you cut yourself to give her blood to ease her hunger for it
>you will never have a weresheep daughteru who cuddles up to your face when you go to bed
Kill me now

>>14248694
Aphrodisiacs are literally the most overplayed literary element in this niche it's disgusting.

>>14248714
>your baby MG daughteru will never fall asleep on your chest clutching your finger

>>14248720
I kind of like them.

>>14248720
Yeah, I think just pure temptation skill is more interesting.
Aphrodisiacs are just cheating mane.

>>14248720
How else do you propose incorporating a Fire Ant's stings?

>>14248701
She'd probably be the type to give really blunt and to the point advice that's actually effective.

>>14248725
Paralyzing poison followed by kidnapping.
Or just poison for self-defense.

>>14248730
>"Listen kid, life's short. You're born, you live a while, and then you die."
>"Now, I don't know what happens after you die. I don't know if there's an afterlife, if you reincarnate, if you start over and do it again but a little differently or if there's fuckin' nothing after you die."
>"But you can't spend your whole life sitting around and moping. Get out, meet new people, do great things with your life. Maybe even meet a girl."
>"One might be closer than you think."
I wish I had a nice Oni drinking buddy to say things like that to me.

>>14248721
That's a strong feeling. But it's not as strong as the thought of your daughter sandwiched between you and wife, all in bed and under the covers.

>>14248734
But anon, Fire Ant poison makes you feel like you're on fire.
The "Burning Lust" joke almost demanded to be made.

>>14248725
Well, it's not an anti-coagulant so there'd be no point in Pod The Rod lasting for ten fucking hours to their stings. The Oomukade bite or Manticore stings which make your tactile sense of touch and receptiveness to pleasure play off easier on the palate because it makes it easier for them to force you to LIKE the feel of their bodies.

Over the generic "My mind's in a haze and I'm stuck in an MC Escher maze" bullshit that gives you a ram-rod erection for God knows how fucking long when the human body can't even do ten male orgasms without it feeling like you're ejaculating fire.

I say this because I hate myself for using that EXACT KIND OF BULLSHIT POISON OR MAGIC EVERY TIME

>>14248740
>Now, I don't know what happens after you die. I don't know if there's an afterlife, if you reincarnate, if you start over and do it again but a little differently or if there's fuckin' nothing after you die

>On the other side of the bar, a Wight, Lich, Zombie, and Will-o-the-Wisp glare at the bartender

>>14248740
Miss Oni are you trying to seduce me?

>>14248740
I wish I had any monster girl as a drinking buddy, an Oni would probably be disappointed at how little it takes to get me tipsy but something like a Cheshire Might be nice.
Cheshires would be cute after a drink or two, everything would be funny to them.

>>14248754
You just need to smile and nod with these things Anon, Onis don't open up like this easily, she just needs someone to listen to her for a bit.

She's a nice girl, even if she's a bit rough on the outside.

>>14248759
I want to drink an Alp under the table, call her a pussy then hi-5 a Minotaur girl from Omega Mu.

>>14248754
Maybe she is.
Maybe she's had her eyes on you ever since you first walked into the bar.
Maybe she just wants you to come home with her and have some rough passionate sex with you and then cuddle in the afterglow.

>>14248759
>Lightweight Cheshire Cat
>She's giggling and hiccuping after a couple drinks.
>She's probably a lot more affectionate too, draping herself over you in a drunken giggly hug.
That's cute. That's way cuter than it has any right to be.

>>14248740
>Oni saying this to Anon
>"Actually, my wife's a Wight. I'm one of those undead Incubi. I thought you monsters could smell that on men, are you just too drunk or something?"
>"Oh yeah? Well if you really were who you say you were, why are you sitting in a bar by yourself?"
>"She works across the street, that big office building. It's our anniversary but she had a meeting so I'm just waiting for her to finish."
>The Oni, looking to find solidarity in her acceptance of mortality, walks away depressed

>>14248773
Don't forget rubbing her cheek against your to mark you as hers.

>>14248740

>>14248773
That's cute as hell. She's probably the kind to fall asleep being carried home on your back too.

>>14248771
There's an old adage that applies to Alps

>I like to drink Martinis, but only one at the most
>Two I'm under the table
>Three i'm under my host

>>14248793
>Three i'm under my host
You wouldn't take advantage of a drunk Alp now would you?

>>14248783
>Drunk Cheshire
>Can't teleport properly, ends up crashing into things when she does.
>Her usual philosophical mumbo jumbo makes even less sense.
>Purring constantly and rubbing her cheek against you until you smell like lavender.
>Can't turn invisible properly, ends up as a pair of legs stumbling beside you.

>>14248800
I'd go full Omar on her and take pictures of her after I've slathered her in my smell and love-juices to blackmail her into more lewd sex

>>14248780
>You'll never go to College in MGC
>You'll never be teased by a Cheshire Cat every single day
>She'll never constantly swipe your underwear and things like that.
>You'll never walk down to a local bar near the campus to calm down.
>She'll never show up and sit down at your table.
>She'll never tease you while slamming down drinks and laughing.
>You'll never actually enjoy yourself despite her antics.
>She'll never follow you out of the bar, stumbling around.
>She'll never press up against your side and ask if you can carry her home.
>You'll never grudgingly oblige and pick her up piggyback style.
>She'll never get oddly quiet as you carry her back to the dorms.
>She'll never lean in and whisper into your ear.
>"Hey, sorry about how I act usually."
>"It's just, this school didn't allow humans until recently, and my mom kept me kinda sheltered."
>"I don't really know how to act around guys. Especially not guys I like."
>"Hey anon... I love you."
>You'll never blush ferociously and try to ask her what she means by that only to see that she's fallen asleep.
This is suffering.

>>14248801
Drunk chesire teleportation could be pretty funny. Just imagine her trying to warp somewhere nearby, only to end up with half her body sticking out of some confused person's abdomen, and her butt sticking out of their back.

>>14248800
There would be some times were you'd wake up with a crude, big, snoring Ogre, holding you in a headlock in your sleep.

Or other times you'd wake up on a frilly, lacey bed with an Alice curled up on your chest.

Are you prepared for that?

My waifu is human

>>14248804
Thats kind of disgusting.

>>14248806
hnnngh

>>14248811
>She tries to teleport to bed
>Instead she manages to teleport her upside down into your lap in a seated 69 piledriver

>>14248816
Yeah, well, Alps are disgusting.

>>14248811
Imagine her trying to warp behind you only to accidentally end up above you.
Her ass would come crashing down on your face.
And she'd be unusually flustered about it.

>>14248815
Get out.

>>14248815
Might as well fuck a man.

>>14248813
>Or other times you'd wake up on a frilly, lacey bed with an Alice curled up on your chest.
I wouldn't mind that, Alices are pretty nice.

What sort of fairy tales do monster mothers tell their daughters before bedtime?

>>14248815
If I had a human sister, I'd do everything in my power to protect her from monsterisation.

>>14248839
Same tbh. Nobody deserves that happening to them.

>>14248843
What if they want it?

>>14248811
>Drunk cheshire tries to sneak into your room via a window
>gets stuck because her ass it too large to fit through the frame

>>14248845
Then it's a tough ethical question. If they want it they probably have a right to do it to themselves but still, destroying yourself mind and soul might as we'll be suicide. Would you let a family member commit suicide or try to get them help?

>>14248848
That's a pretty big ass.

>>14248857
For you.

>>14248855
I'd say destroying their mind and soul is a stretch. They could easily be turned into a monster that suits them.

>>14248833
A tale about a broken knight getting healed by a qt farmgirl.

>>14248848
>Wake up
>She's sobered up but still stuck in the window
>Have her service your morning wood with her mouth before you free her

>>14248845
Then I guess that's okay. If they're fully aware of the ramifications, and willing to change on their own terms, I wouldn't mind so much.
It's just having things in your head change like that. To become a slave to urges at the cost of actual thought that bothers me.

>>14248857
I don't think it's abnormal for Cheshires to have wide hips and big bottoms.
>>14248864
Now we're talkin'.

>>14248848
>"Ohhhh noooo, hahaha... I sure hope nobody takes advantage of me like this."
>You just lie in bed, trying to ignore the drunk Cheshire's plump ass jiggling about in your direction, the window frame creaking.
>"I'm pretty helpless right now... Complete- HIC! -ly stuck~"
>You're tired, you just want to sleep.

I want to be cornered by a Jabberwock and Chesire who demand me to tell them which has the bigger breasts and ass!

>>14248862
The keyword here is could.
And even then their personality will still change to some extend.

Unless the concept of a soul exists, monsterization is something no one deserves.

>>14248862
It completely changes their thought processes, needs, wants and goals. Imagine you got magically changed to hate the Internet and everything about it. Sure, you'd probably be better off but would you be the same person?

Also, if we go by MGE canon they usually just turn into succubi.

>>14248873
>a Jabberwock and Chesire who demand me to tell them which has the bigger breasts and ass!
What were the results of that poll anyways?

Where are we going on a field trip today, teacher?

>>14248860
For me?
>>14248870
>I don't think it's abnormal for Cheshires to have wide hips and big bottoms.

I like this. I like this a LOT.
>>14248872
That cats getting a spanking.

>>14248881
We're going to the zoo.

The zoo is awesome.

>>14248881
The stump

>>14248872
I kinda want to go get some baby oil or something and use it to get her unstuck from the window.
Then I'd princess carry her to the bed and fuck her senseless.
Then in the morning I'd ask her to be my girlfriend.

>>14248873
The only real answer is to fuck them both while assuring them that they're both great.

>>14248881
That museum that lets you touch all those cool exhibits.

>>14248881
Does anyone have the last yeti beach trip thing saved?
Are there any others besides it?

>>14248891
They won't be very cool after she's done with them.

>>14248845
Hope their husband is a family man, otherwise you're never going to see her again. Once she's a monster she'll be too busy being his buttslut to bother showing up to the family reunions, and if you try to visit them she'll just get upset at you for interrupting their together time.

>>14248855
Meh, the whole personality death thing is edgy bullshit. I'd rather think of it as being fundamentally the same as being human but with some perks and increased sexual desire.

>>14248898
>monsters exist solely to have sex with human men
>become even more single-minded once they find a husband
>edgy bullshit

Where do you live, where this wouldn't constitute a change of personality for the women around you, anon? I'd like to vacation in porno-world this summer.

>>14248898
>Wanting 3DPD monster girls.

Go to /a/ and don't come back.

>>14248839
>>14248855
>Be Paladin's squire when your family is blessed by a beautiful human daughter
>She's a giggling mess every time you give her piggy-back rides
>She dotes on you about how you're her big strong onii-chan
>Save her from bullies, your back to her
>She cries when you refuse to let them strike your back, telling them only cowards retreat from the path of justice and righteousness
>You grow out of touch as you become a full fledged Knight of the Order Sanctorum
>Your parents send word by raven that your sister went off into a city on the outer limits with a neighboring Demon Realm
>She'd been training to become a cleric
>You race your horses to its absolute limits, your mind closing around the abhorrent, unthinkable terror of her becoming a harlot whore monster
>Forced to wander for a man to rape and breed
>The city is dark, full of Succubi and other monsters corrupting women left and right in a midnight raid
>Caith Siths turning other women into furbait with their dander being rubbed onto them
>Succubi schlicking young maidens into corruption
>You hear a scream, your sister's
>Moments before impact, the Succubus tells her how she's going to unleash all of her pent up frustrations
>Your pauldron has never impacted more truly, sending the slut-demon careening into a wall and into unconsciousness
>Tell your imouto to get behind you as you weather the blows of an entire monster invasion force
>Bones break and are mended to the best of her feeble ability
>Your body is bloody ruin at the end of it,you can feel the darkness taking you, pain is your existence
>But all the monsters have been subdued and marked for expulsion
>The last thing you remember is your beloved younger sister hugging you from behind, calling you an idiot and acting to recklessly
>Wake up days later in an unfamiliar bed covered in bandages that she'd just cleaned
>Ask her how she knew it was you before you said anything
"Whenever I needed help, you were my Shield."

>>14248904
>>14248908
Don't take the bait, kids

>>14248908
Maybe he meant 2D human girls. 2D human girls are nice too.

>>14248895
No puns, please.

>>14248904
Maybe he just doesn't get off on the idea of all the MGs being nothing more than walking fleshlights?

In case you missed it last thread, I finished up a story about a dragongirl bounty hunter: http://pastebin.com/1m5nbxmH

20,000 words if you're wondering about length.

And now I disappear again.

>>14248922
Frankly, neither do I. That's just the way they're described.

Though KC did say that they might enjoy going to sporting events with their husbands, so maybe there's some unreliable narrator bullshit going on with the profile descriptions. Since they're supposedly being written by a monster, I wouldn't be surprised if she wrote about how married monsters spend all of their time having crazy sex because she's single and frustrated and writing with one hand up her skirt.

Magical Kiki's!

Headpat one today!

>>14248933
It's a fucking Dark Matter, not rocket science to figure out what she's doing.

>>14248936
How magical?

>>14248939
Who even put her up to it? It just seems like such a bizarre thing for a monster to do.

There's also the stuff in the setting materials, like >>14248087
Those are a bit harder to handwave.

>>14248936
Indeed.

>>14248943
Flying on their brooms and singing meaningfull songs magical.

>>14248893
I found the Yeti beach short
>>/jp/thread/S14031930#p14035363

>>14248936
I'm now imagining a kikimora who magically commands an armoury of broomsticks.

I'm now imagining her wielding the brooms like Noctis from FFXV, for ultimate dusting action.

>>14248936
Kiki's Delivery Service

>>14248933
Actually, I believe KC said almost exactly that. At least, I'm under the impression narrator bias was mentioned by someone.

"Monsters exist solely to have sex with human men" should be interpreted as monsters were remade to sexually desire men. There's plenty of room to assume they have personalities, hopes, and dreams.

If there's one generalization I can feel comfortable making about this thread, it's that most anons here seem to be more interested in having a loving waifu then ending up as some cumpump in a Druella realm orgy pit.

Paladin girls > Monster girls

>>14248961
I'd cuddle her if she'd let go of her irrational hate and fear, and work with me to help human/MG relations.

>>14248951
Neat, thanks.
I wonder if we'll see more of that. I kind of want to see them visit somewhere like a rainforest, or something.

>>14248957
Well sex would get boring after the 500th time. It's like chocolate, it's nice but you gotta mix it up or you'll get sick.
>>14248961
They have cool armor I'll give her that.

>>14248961
>Boobplates
LITERALLY RETARDED.

>>14248944
The whole "they're walking fleshlights" shit is why I don't put any stones into KC's world. You can call me a faggot for that all you want but I'd rather at least be doing something with a waifu other than fucking like rabbits.

An anon in the last thread brought up protecting your home from unwanted sabbath gang-bangers with a sanctuary spell.
I have one question about that, though. After the rift to the demon realm opens, how many people do you think have the dosh to hire a sorcerer for home security? Not everyone has the resources to turn their home into a monster girl fallout shelter. Are we really going to jump back a few generations and turn into this Monster Hunter-esque society that fights for survival on the daily?

>>14248945
I'm taking that Werewolf home.

>>14248968
>sex would get boring after the 500th time
I don't follow. Why would the sex get boring?

I'm not saying they wouldn't be lustful creatures. I wouldn't be here if the idea of getting pounced and ravished by the waifu didn't excite me. But for me at least, and I assume the guys who post about waifus, we want more than sex without love.

>>14248660
Fatty Pizzamets!

>>14248972
Look at the gold trim, man. I'm 90% sure that's ceremonial armor.

>>14248975
That's what life is like in countries that border on a demon realm, though. If you don't want to be constantly on guard against being jumped by a monster you find disgusting and mind-fucked into being attracted to her, you should move to a country bordered only by human-controlled territories.

>>14248975
Hire a full fledged wizard no. But people will very quickly learn the importance of warding and take some lessons in magic themselves. There will be quite a market for cheap, but decent wards.

>>14248972
I like MGC. It's a fun setting.
>>14248979
Well I mean if it's nothing BUT sex it'd get tedious. You need cuddling and all that other stuff.

>>14248979
I think that's exactly the point he's making. Sex would get boring after the 500th time [if that's all there is to it].
Obviously I added on that last part, but I think that clarifies things a bit. You want something to bond over besides just sex.

>>14248957
I'd like to think that monsters GENERALLY think like humans except that their sex drive is ramped up five or six times and they're significantly more straightforward about what they want.

>>14248989
Oh, you were agreeing with me. I see. Exactly.

>>14248990
Yeah, I finally got what he meant.

It's not my thing, but I don't have an issue with anons who don't want what I do. That' why there's green realms.

>>14248990
>boring after the 500th time

What a naive thing to say.

>>14248957
>it's that most anons here seem to be more interested in having a loving waifu then ending up as some cumpump in a Druella realm orgy pit.

Fucking normies.
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>14248997
It most likely varies from species to species and probably even girl to girl.

So, over the last couple of weeks we've discussed the idea of MG's being able to sniff out fetishes.

How do you feel about the idea that spirit energy smells/tastes particularly good to a monster that would make an ideal mate (both sexually and romantically)? And I mean, before the MG would become "keyed in" onto your taste.

I literally cannot think of a story that the thread won't hate. Especially if it involves an unholy abomination like a Myrmecoleon.

>>14248999
Well, I suppose it's more of a general statement. Understand the intent of it, even if it isn't worded in the best possible way, and you get what I just explained.

I mean, even then we take take that "sex 500 times" thing literally, and still see that it might not be the greatest thing. Even removing physical limits as factor, just imagine doing it 500 times in a row, with nothing else to it. Nothing to interject into it, or any other bonding. It's going to get boring, I think, because beyond the pleasure, your brain simply isn't being stimulated.

>>14248982
Then the cost of safe properties within human territory will skyrocket. The only affordable "safe" space would be a place like Zipangu.
I'm beginning to understand the appeal of tanuuki.

>>14248983
This could work, too, although without a strong militia, the town could be fun down by a magically gifted Monster in an instant.

>>14248904
>>14248933
>>14248957

This is actually one of the reasons for the falling out between MGU and KC. The author of the MGE is an unreliable narrator, and KC makes heavy use of hyperbole in his expressions. Some of the MGU folks took it waaaaaaaay too seriously, and when he was like "Uh, seriously hyperbole for dramatic effect and stuff. Maybe it doesn't translate well across cultures, but my readers here in Japan just kinda get that the descriptions are over the top" some of those same folks started freaking out and declaring death of the author. That, along with the asshole who did shit like send drawings of dismembered MGs to KC on his birthday, were enough for him to finally go "Fuck it. You no longer have permission to host my content."

>>14248997
I can dig that.

>>14249011
Stop trying to get a pity-party going Bollocks.

>>14249012
The animal mind is not wired to get bored of sex. Our own would have gone extinct long ago if that were so.

Some nice stuff just got put up, hope they get translated
http://exhentai.org/g/865557/e89544a12e/
http://exhentai.org/g/865554/174da31079/

>>14249011
Go away.

>>14249020
I get bored of sex. With some of my relationships it's honestly felt like a chore.

>>14248936
Lots of headpats for knowing how to ride like a proper lady. It's unwomanlike for her to straddle it like a horse.

>>14249019
Not him but okay

>>14249022
>aruse yuuji
His hmanga with the hornetgirl still isn't translated.

>>14249010
hopefully she'd be able to settle on a favourite.
spirit energy would be like ice cream, they're all so good but she'd have to choose one in the end

>>14249010
I don't see a downside.

>>14249026
Bored with whom you're with. That's different.

Also

>some of my relationships
>implying many

Fucking degenerate normalfag

>>14249033
>TFW the only one he has that's translated is a fucking actual salamander... salamander

>>14249011
You can't please everyone, just write shit that you want to write.

>>14249020
All day, every day? With literally nothing else of value in between? No learning, living, talking, or any of the other things that make us human?

I think sexual desire is a wonderful and good thing. Love keeps the fire lit, lust keeps you warm when it's cold outside. But it would be like dying inside to be devoid of anything other than mindless sexual need.

>>14249022
Queen Slimes are always nice to see.

>>14249017
I first discovered MGE when the profiles were first being translated and we were having threads about them on /tg/, trying to figure out what living in such a setting would be like. The general consensus was that it was pretty fucking dark when you took five seconds to think about it.

It still looks that way, frankly. All the "monsterization is mind-death" stuff makes perfect fucking sense in the context of the before-and-after character profiles. You know, the ones where the characters "after" say shit like "Why did I ever care about all that stupid old stuff when I could've been taking the dick instead? Ha ha ha, I was so dumb!"

Maybe it's just me, but that's pretty spooky stuff.

>>14249010
It makes perfect sense. Humans already do that to a lesser degree: people with complimentary histocompatibility complexes smell and taste good to each other.

>>14249044
That one was given a yandere tag, although the salamander girl in that one didn't act yandere.

Which kinda disappointed me to a degree.

>>14249048
See this post:
>>14249017

>>14249052
>TFW smell fetish is so dirty that it's great when it comes to pheromones over B.O. or maybe both

>>14249012
>I mean, even then we take take that "sex 500 times" thing literally, and still see that it might not be the greatest thing.

I agree, but at the same time I think it's... well, not a good-for-you thing, but a good-in-a-narrative-sense.

You're fucking a monsterous demon for god's sake. It's not SUPPOSED to be good for you. It's SUPPOSED to end up as some sort of ironic Faustian punishment where you traded away your soul for sex, but now you have all the sex you want, you find yourself yearning instead for the deep and abiding love of a soul-mate - something you can never have any more, because you traded your soul for sex.

You made your monsterphile bed, heretic.
Lie in it.

>>14249048
Maybe they seek a comfortable death, with no need to worry about their needs or their contributions to society, just basking in the warmth of another's body while they fade away.

>>14249034
Think of it like that succubus story, except they home in on you instinctually. One minute you're pleasantly going about your business, the next you're jumped by some incredibly aroused MG that ends up being your soulmate.

>>14249052
>You know, the ones where the characters "after" say shit like "Why did I ever care about all that stupid old stuff when I could've been taking the dick instead? Ha ha ha, I was so dumb!"

Yeah, in a way that makes them more boring.

>>14249053
>Giving a yandere tag to something not yandere
That's like saying Laska in .less' art isn't a yangire/sycophant with the fucking knife fetish she has now

>>14249062
>>14249063
If you like that kind of thing, more power to you I guess. I don't see how you're trading your soul at all. Peace between two former bitter enemies, love, and really good sex. I don't think anyone's going to hell because they chose to make love rather than war.

>>14249010
Imagine a monstergirl saying "I don't want any spirit energy but yours!"
That's cuter than it should be.

>>14249070
Laska is shit in general, and it sucks to see Bobs buttbaby abomination associated with yandere.

>>14249075
There's a difference between yandere and yangire, Anon

Imagine it guys, a Bapho-size dragon.

>>14249075
Laska is GOAT

>>14249079
>Bapho-size dragon
That'd be a loli.

>>14249010
But I don't want the ones that would like me

>>14249079
No.

>>14249084
>>14249086
In my dream she had the attitude of an adult and was pretty chill

>>14249090
Nobody fucking cares.

Fuck off to your blog.

>>14249084
>TFW no Loli Red Dragon to pout when you're not scared of her fire burps

>>14249092
Someones in a bad mood.

Anyway what kind of dreams have you guys had that involve Monster Girls, im curious now

>You're fucking a monsterous demon for god's sake. It's not SUPPOSED to be good for you. It's SUPPOSED to end up as some sort of ironic Faustian punishment where you traded away your soul for sex, but now you have all the sex you want, you find yourself yearning instead for the deep and abiding love of a soul-mate - something you can never have any more, because you traded your soul for sex.

Can someone explain why they find this kind of setting appealing? We've discussed dystopian settings with conflict between MGs and humans, but this is the first time I've seen the argument that having an MG wife should be anything other than a good end.

>>14249100
Suffering fetish.

>>14249071
>I don't think anyone's going to hell because they chose to make love rather than war.

You're going to hell because Chiefy takes a dim view of miscegenation.

I guess I think it's in a way MORE sexy, and dare I say romantic, if human-monster couplings come with a price, instead of being strictly better than human-human relationships. Whether that price comes in terms of severe rocks-thrown-at-you-in-the-street social stigma, incubus personality degradation, a guarantee of eternal damnation, so much sex you stop enjoying it, or whatever.

It just feels to me like there should be some genuine challenge in it, otherwise its... well, it's too easymodo.

>>14249052
KC insists the Fallen Maidens are a special case. They're apparently so broken that not even demonic energy could "fix" them without rewriting huge chunks of their identity.

>>14249098
This is all that needs to be said.

>>14249110
>only given example is a 'special case'
That's just lazy writing, KC, or you want to go back on what you've written. Besides they seemed basically normal to me if a bit... driven.

>>14249106
>strictly better than human-human relationships
The price is the suffering of countless millions of humans that have died fighting the monsters. The challenge is figuring out how to deal with coexistence.

I mean, if you get off on the idea of burning n hell for eternity, by all means. I was under the impression that hell was reserved for evil people and pandemonium was created for couples that that chiefy bars from heaven.

I like conflict in a setting. I don't like a setting where every ending is a bad one, just because.

>>14249098
None
The only dream I had recently that I remember was the one where I was being sucked dry by ticks. And not in the dick way I mean blood. I wish I had dreams about monstergirls.

>>14249141
I had a flea infestation once. Nightmares and anxiety for months even after we killed them off.

I want to go to a party where I'm the only boy in a room full of CC monster girls.

And one Paladin my age to make things interesting.

I wonder If I'll dream of monster girls tonight.

>>14249098
Only a couple. The first one had me in some street in some random Japanese neighborhood where I was hugged by an arachne (crabman style, I'm afraid). Rather than the usual rapey-rapey, she seemed more gentle, like she was trying to reassure me over something; that I shouldn't have to worry anymore and everything would be alright.

That's the only one I can remember in detail. The others are pretty minimal: One had an unusual focus on Polt's surprisingly bare abdomen, while another had me waking up to a Kikimora spooning me in my sleep because she thought I needed to be kept warm

New monster tomorrow.
What are you hoping for?
Are you prepared for more disappointment?

>>14249098
Didn't really have a dream but recently I woke up thinking about Yeti butt

Your daughteru comes home wearing black mascara and saying that kindness and morality are weakness and she'll do what she wants from now on! How do you snap her out of her edgy phase?

>>14249185
Tall, with big breasts and a big ass.

I am a man of simple needs.

>>14249185
The storm is over.

Now we get a real gem. Something on the level of Kiki or Shoggoth in terms of universal appeal

>>14249187
Wait for real life to show her that kindness and morality give meaning in an otherwise empty existence.

>>14249161
Eat loads of cheese, and drink lots of milk, or something like that.
Not for any holst/dormouse related issues, but because just having dairy in your stomach while you sleep will make your dreams more vivid.
I'm not sure of the exact mechanism, but I'm told that's where the whole "cheese gives you nightmares" thing comes from. It just gives you more vivid dreams, so a nightmare is just statistically more likely to happen.

>>14249187
Let her go through it. This is something she needs to get out of on her own. Maybe after she gets a boyfriend.

And maybe say she's too old to sleep with Mr Fuzzybunny.

>>14249185
something cuddly

>>14249185
>What are youh oping for?
I'm hoping it's NOT a Kumiho, after seeing what KC did to the poor wendigo. Please, KC, just... just never make a kumiho.

>>14249187
Force her to look at peoples' steel donut sanics on DeviantArt until she snaps out of it.

>>14249201
>And maybe say she's too old to sleep with Mr Fuzzybunny.
She'll deny sleeping with it, but you'll still check in on her one night and see it lying next to her.

>>14249185
CU SITH

>>14249187
Ground her, and forbid her from all the luxuries and nice things she normally gets. Obviously she doesn't need any kindness from her parents, if she's cast it aside like that.
Once she snaps out of her phase, make up for all the love she was denied during it, and show her how worthwhile morality and kindness to another being can be.

>>14249209
Of course. Just as she'd deny her feelings for that nice boy in her class.

>>14249194
But she says being hardcore and doing cruel things totally works! She read a story on the internet about it!

>>14249190
>Kikimoras
>Universal appeal
They're boring maids.

>>14249210
Anon are you crazy?

It'll never happen. I mean, KC would never stoop that low.

>TFW can't meme Cu Sith anymore since it actually happened

>>14249187
BANE?!

>>14249190
The sooner you accept the Iä Iä into your heart the better. Too bad only Harblador wrote anything with one worth a shit.

>>14249185
Zombie Dragon
And I am never prepared for disappointment, Please do not hurt my heart, KC.

>>14249226
Story about a shoggoth who is actually an amalgamation of several absorbed kikimoras when?

>>14249190
>universal appeal
I don't like maids though.

>>14249185
I'm not really hoping for anything in particular, but you know what we haven't seen much of recently?

An aquatic monstergirl. A proper ocean dweller. I'm sort of holding out for one in that vein.

>>14249185
A magical construct this time.
;_;

I want to cumflate a familiar

>>14249187

No more headpats.
No more hugs.
No more Dad-cooked steaks on Saturdays.
No more Dad-smiles or Dad-laughs, only the occasional grunt to just barely acknowledge she exists and a cold stare the rest of the time.

I don't want to, but I certainly can. I learned from the best

>>14249235
When you write it, faggot. I have better things to procrastinate from than that insult to a Shoggoth.

Making her an amalgam of fucking Kikimoras absorbed by some kind of lovecraft slime, how absurd.

>>14249256
That's even more evil then her.

>>14249185
More oppai lolis.

>>14249201
>>14249209
This prompts a question in me. One of my prized possessions is this simple little teddy bear my mother bought in anticipation of my birth.

What kind of stuffed animal would you buy for your daughteru for her to cuddle every night when you first bring her home?

>>14249269
Pally Din, the stuffed paladin who protects lolis from bad dreams and is justicly soft!
Now with morning star!

>>14249269
A Mario Boo plush.

>>14249233
I wanna ask that Draco Lich why she looks so sad!

>>14249253
she would be so damn cute on your lap, rubbing her belly happily.

>>14249269
I'm glad I'm not the only one who kept his birth toy.

Nothing wrong with a simple fuzzy teddy bear.

>>14249269
I guess something related to her race. A qt dragon daughter playing with beanie babies would probably send me into cardiac arrest, though.

>>14249269
>teddy bear

I too owned a teddy bear so I'd give them one as well. Gotta keep family tradition eh?

>>14249269

The exact same thing I used as a little boy.

A stuffed Ninja Turtle.

>>14249269
A stuffed knight doll or some shit.

>TFW it's easier to just funpost in /mgt/ instead of trying to write stuff because smut all the time is boring

>>14249269
either a teddy bear or a bunny

>>14249297
You don't need to write all smut, all the time.

It just receives massively more views and comments, encouraging you to write more of it!

>Werecat waifu says she's hungry
>You're kind of hungry yourself
>Start making dinner
>She hovers around you the entire time and pesters you about whether or not it's done
>You finish cooking, toss it on a couple plates and bring it to the table for the two of you
>Only for her to wander off and watch TV
>She does the same thing when you have to go somewhere
>Gets ready real fast and starts rushing you only to fall asleep on the couch when you get to the door

>>14249185
not a loli, maybe another scalely one like a hydra or something.
Shark girl might be cool too.

>>14249311
That's how you get spankings.

>Loli vampire being followed everywhere by her shota butler

>>14249269
Well, I've got a little wolf toy I've had for just under my whole life, but it's about 6 inches tall. No good for cuddling, really.
And for an anubis daughter, it just seems redundant.
Maybe a great big owl?

>>14249281
Yep, although mobility may be a bit of a problem

>>14249336
I remember that.
Shame nothing ever came of it.

>>14249347
I'll have it in mind next time a drawfag ask for ideas.

>>14249343
She's a familiar, she can probably just cast some spell to get around.
If she can't teleport, then she can probably use levitation on herself to get around like a buoyant, cum-filled helium balloon.

>>14248675
I got it because I wrote (most) of it.

>>14249353
Or I could just carry her.
She probably wouldn't mind that.

Could you imagine the craigslist in a monster girl world? All kinds of men looking to whore themselves out to Monster Girls, and infinitely more Monster Girls looking to get some dick.

>"19/M/Looking for nice older girl who enjoys long walks on the beach and romance :)"
>Gets 50 emails 5 minutes after posting, with most variations of "eyy babe u wan sum fuck?"

Alternatively for Monster Girls selling shit

>"LCD TV, works good, brand new, must cum in mouth twice, pick up only."

>>14249340
Oh, how about a stuffed crocodile?

>>14249359
I remember when familiars worked for their summoners, and not the other way round.

>>14249362
You mean a stuffed Petsuchos.

>>14249359
carry her to the bathtub so can let it all out of her pussy and bathe in it

>>14249365
Sobek plushie also valid.

>>14249364
Damn kids these days. Back in my day we had to sell our souls to fuck a succubutt. These days it's as easy as posting on Craigslist and all they want is our semen. Damn kids have it so easy.

>>14249360
I'd probably use it.

>>14249362
That could work also. Bonus points if it's big enough to fit someone's head in the mouth.

>>14249375
but does it have any teeth?

>>14249360
>Never done this before, looking to have some wild times before I finish college. Up for tailpussy gangbang or mating ball orgy, can't host, respond with "college party" so I know you're real.

>>14248815
Good on ya.

>>14249377
Teeth made out of felt, yes.
But don't go thinking that means it's harmless. Threaten to blow raspberries on that anubis' tummy, and she'll get her crocodile friend to bite your head clean off.

>>14249385
>Paladin is fighting off a group of Devils just as the new Demon Lord comes to power
>returns to camp with a bunch of blue lolis clinging to her and calling her onee-chan
>all while with a tired and very irritated expression

>>14249360
I guess craiglist is some type of website to find dates?

>>14249397
And straight to the adoption shelter it goes.

>>14249397
all while she has*

>>14249405
Fuck
>>14249398

>>14249185
something with a fluffy tail, possibly squirrely