/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Am I the first to post? Oh well then... So I'm just going to repost something similar from last thread.

Congratulations, you and a Monstergirl/favorite monstergirl are gonna enroll to the prestigious Garreg Mach Officer's Academy as students.

https://monstergirlencyclopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Special:RandomInCategory/Mamono

So enter the link to see which Monstergirl you're going to tag along with in your time at the Officer's Academy. However, that is not all. You and the Monstergirl you roll with are gonna join up with either the Red Eagles, the Blue Lions and or the Golden Deer.

>Rules:

>Enter the link to roll a Monstergirl. After getting a generated Mamono who will be your Garegg Mach partner, get one dice. As in a 1-6 dice, or six sided dice. Roll the dice and if you get roll 1 to 2 you and the Mamono join the Black Eagles House and Edelgard. If you roll 3 to 4 then you and the Mamono join up Dimitri and Blue Lions. If you roll 5 to 6 then you and the Mamono join up with Uncle Claudius and the Golden Deer House.

Go ahead and tell the results and maybe a story of it.

I'm fine with party members that need some leveling.

>>24720310
Nana Whitehorn makes the best hot cocoa.

NUCLEAR HELL RAVEN

>>24720676
There goes the neighbourhood

>"They are stronger than us, smarter than us, live longer than us, and are far better looking than us. They are our superiors in every respect, and the taxes are lower when they rule. When they come back I will be the first to welcome them"
- Anon, Undead Kingdom loyalist

>>24720990
>"And best of all, if you marry one you get most or all the benefits of being one!"

Choose one monster girl for each of the following:
>Sports bra
>Lace bra
>No cup bra

>>24721401
Salamander
Wight
Jinko

>>24720990
Is that an actual quote? Sounds like one.

What monster would most likely use the infamous grapefruit technique on your dick?

>>24720990
I want Remilia to fuck me. She's so cute.

>>24721480
obvious answer: alarune
or one of them wonderland sluts, after doing a line of blow off your erect penis

>>24721480
A shoggoth. Because not only is The Grapefruit eldritch knowledge she would be able to morph her hand into one.

Why don't monstergirls want us to have rights?

>>24722144
Because their right to bear your children SHALL NOT be infringed

>>24722144
Historically humans when having rights and free will used it to kill eachother

I want to see MGE France.
I bet its full of CHIVALRY

>>24721479
From Warhammer Fantasy. The roleplaying game specifically.

>>24722199
Lescatia, I believe, was MGE France.

>>24722144
They want us to have "Incubus rights" instead

>>24722144
What rights do I need inside a sandworm's mouth?
I can't think of any.

>>24722199
>MGE France
>all the human noblewomen are turned into dullahans

Got a nice lewd of Yepa done up by Kuroi_Oni. Go check them out.
http://imgbox.com/T7v7cXmE

>>24721686
The mansion's mistress will take very good care of you.

>>24722383
That's good

>>24722192
huh, guess monsters enslaving us and keeping us as property is for our own good...
who would've thunk

>>24722387
The whole staff as well. That's how it is being the lady's favorite toy!

>>24722383
Big wendi!
Kuroi's a really nice artist, both with their output and as a person. Seconding the shilling.

>>24722438
"You look soft, Anon."

Stop talking like this. You have no idea how pleasant it sounds to serve, and make myself useful to someone more powerful than I.

>>24722476
Yes, but on my face as well

>>24722383
That's good.

>>24722491
>You have no idea
Exactly, that's why I want the portals

>>24722199
>go to MGE France expecting noble knights who will woo you and treat you right
>the second you set foot in your first fief, the local lady declares you her property
>marries you off to a sadistic vampire in another country to strengthen her family name and cement her right as a claimant to the throne

>>24722491
Continue to make yourself useful and your future will be bright.

Which monstergirl would play Pokemon with me?

>>24722589
>marries you off to a sadistic vampire

What do you think the average familiar from each sabbath would be like?

>>24722641
Small.

>>24722589
Good old crusader kings.

When will I stop shivering whenever MGs, or any women for that matter, touch me?

I'm gonna get eaten by a succubus if this doesn't stop soon enough.

>>24722740
Well are you shivering from excitement, or fear? Either-way Mamano find it adorable; there's no way you're not getting turned into a pampered cum-pump Anon.

>>24722978
I'm not sure, but it's happening again right now. I don't want to feel this way. I want it to stop.

>>24722978
>attract large group of succubi
>they all hit on your friends instead

>>24722637
Anon, no! Having your blood drained so often will leave you weak and helpless! You'll have to spend all day resting your head in her lap while she holds court and feeds you iron-rich snacks so she can suck you again!

>>24723169
Shhh.

>>24722641
Sexy

Let's play a game.

Name some species that could have been your waifu, and briefly/vaguely explain why you went with something different. Then we try to guess your waifu.

For example, I could have easily gone with a vampire or nurarihyon, but I needed something more monstrous in appearance.

>>24723146
That just means something scarier has you in her sights

>>24723052
Juusstt reelaaxx Anon. Deep breaths, in, and out, and just focus on how it feels as their fingers run lightly all over your body. Besides, you won't have the energy to shiver when they're through with you.

>>24723146
good for them, I hope their relationships go well

>>24722594
>Etiquette training with the head maid
>It's just her teaching you how to best undress to build eroticism and keep your clothes clean, how to use your tongue, and the best kinds of faces and vocalizations to make.
>Laboratory assistant.
>Help the magician with her work by cleaning up, fetching her books, and act as her guinea pig or just satisfiying her lust a bit.
>Secondary gatekeeper.
Help the gatekeeper keep her eyes on the gate, maybe sneak a quickie in if it'll get her to focus on her job when it's done.
>Guest's Valet.
>Make sure guests to the manor have all their needs satisfied and go home content with the manor. usually this means fucking the shrine maiden so she "forgets" complaints about the manor.

>>24720365
Auntie Deer's hot cocoa vs. Yetea hot cocoa is the great debate in Winterstown - on days when the Ice Queen's blizzards are at their peak, both shops are packed earmuff to earmuff for a golden, steaming cup of chocolate and marshmallows

>>24723294
I imagine my waifu putting me through trust and relaxation exercises with her, so I don't lose my mind just from holding hands.

>>24723312
>"P-p-prove the vampire isn't up to something bad again!"

Night shift has begun.

>>24723523
I really like the grooved and curved horns.

>>24723539
Drinkie snek

I love foxes.

>>24723272
I'd say Apophis?

As for me, I liked Lich for a while, but I found another species that was similar, but more emotional and monstrous.

>Exploring an abandoned manor
>Turns out the gate Gargoyle is alive, and wants to start a family with you
>Fuck like catholic rabbits until the sun rises, and both of you are turned into stone
>During the day, a Wight buys the property
Does this mean the you and the gargoyle are now property of the Wight? Or are there monster rights that prevent something like this from happening?

Drinkie snek

>>24720990
>>24722144
>>24722491
>>24722589
It wouldn't kill if you guys shot up some testosterone in your system once in a while.

>>24723476
>>24723312
Hell yes. Breed the fertile youkai miko while the mistress is watching with great interest!

Women who look pure and act pure, but are bottomless pits of sluttiness only towards their husbands are the best type of woman there is, and the best example of this are Kikimoras.
Chaste and pure, even downright cold towards people other than her master, but will do just about anything with him behind closed doors.

>>24723312
I really liked this list you wrote.

>>24723612
Squatters rights, anon. If the Gargoyle has been living in the manor property for long enough, and has been putting some effort to make the manor itself safe to live in, she would own it, not the Wight.

>>24723312
>>Help the gatekeeper keep her eyes on the gate, maybe sneak a quickie in if it'll get her to focus on her job when it's done.
>gatekeeper lifts you up while giving you a blowjob
>snu snu in her guard house later

>>24723272
>Started off with lich, but wanted something a bit more monstrous
>Cursed sword, manticore, honey bees, bicorns, nightmares, and ocelomeh all sounded great, but just had few things missing or undesirable for me
>Considered houris at some point, but realized I was too much of a scumbag for Eros to ever give me one

>>24723272
I wanted an anubis, but drifted over to another monstergirl who could satisfy my need for near death experiences, mixed with nobility.

>>24723272
Not really sure on this one. Gazer?
>>24723566
Baphomet?
>>24723962
Khepri?
>>24723991
Wight or Vampire.

This is harder than I expected.

>>24723280
Heard a lilim is in town tonight

>>24723272
Dark Elf
She's got the whole S&M thing going on that I'm totally into, but she's not my dragonfu so there's no helping it.

>>24723476
>The Shrine maiden has developed a habit of visiting the manor and not leaving until she's "sure nothing sinister is going on"
>Her first visits were serious where the head maid pushed you to distract her with the kills you learned, which lead to the both of you naked and on the floor.
>All her other visits were her using any excuse to come over and not leaving until you fucked her.
>With all her visits lately, you're starting to think she's been really holding back for most of her life.
>It's actually getting annoying to have to tend to her all the time.
>Eventually the mistress just slips you a potion the magician made and gives you a wink, saying that if her bloodline were connected to the manor she'd stop harassing them.

>>24724079
I won't say which, but you are correct

>>24724090
Dragon. You're not supposed to say who she is.

>>24724079
Ah and the girl I was considering was Kejourou, as cool as the hair is, there are other ways of rendering me helpless.

>>24724097
>saying that if her bloodline were connected to the manor she'd stop harassing them.
What a great scheme. I'm in.

>>24723272
Nachos
I really love hardcore tsundere girls, plus getting berated by little girls is hot, but I really don't think the whole 'turning into a giant dick-spider thingy' work well when there's another waifu in the picture

>>24724079
On the money, Anon! I adore her claws, and love how she can take my soul and body to the brink!

>>24724079
Not Baphoment, Tengu.

Bapho with transparent camisole
https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/82932954

>>24724079
No, I'll add on to >>24723962 if it will help.
>The combat abilities of Cursed sword and Ocelomeh were very appealing to me
>Bicorns are great for fulfilling my "surrounded by beautiful and horny women" fantasy
>Bees, manticores, and ocelomeh all share a feature that I like on my girls
>I like Houri's skin and loyalty
The girl combines all of these features, or at least makes it possible to have them all.

>>24723272
Kikis are very comfy, and easily lend themselves to the kind of switch-y kink I'm into. Hellhounds or Wolfus too, but they're a little too dommy.

>>24723272
A Kiki, but I ended up with a waifu with the exact opposite personality of one after realizing my preference for being a sub but still having a waifu that wants what's best for me.

>>24724126
I reject your reality and substitute my own. Just like how my wife would.

>>24724195
Wolf Tengus are just right. Momiji is fine as she is.

>>24723272
I haven't decided yet, but it's a toss-up between multiple monsters that don't act constantly horny yet like to be handled. I'm definitely a dom, though.
Hint: none of them are lolis and they are all canids

Remember that the best clerics and shrine maidens have massive breasts.

>>24724159
Great taste, but "nobility" made it pretty easy.
>>24724162
Never read Tengu's profile, harpies don't interest me.
>>24724182
Uhh, H'orc?
>Strong
>In charge of a bunch of Orcs
>Fluffy
>Brown

>>24724286
Wow!

You should go to the threads that talk about shrine maidens!

>>24724288
Yeah, it's H'orc.

>>24723272
>Name some species that could have been your waifu
Lamia and jabberwock. I like what they both have to offer, but I prefer something better; something that's a 2-for-1

>>24724286
Such faith

>>24723710
remilia looks so comfy and pregnant!

>>24724097
Woa.

>>24724227
Close but not quite.

I want to lose spectacularly to a low level monster. Like those werecats you find in the starting area.

>>24723280
I hope that means their buffcubus friend is going to arrive.

>>24724361
Exactly.
Its why Valkyries, angels, and other faith based monsters have such big bosoms.
They come from faithful stock!

>>24724419
You have to take off your gear. And you won't believe the monster's eyes when the high level adventurer is "defeated" after he's been afking at same spot for about four hours.

>>24720990
No more nobility, no more kings, no more queens, the age of monarchy is over!

>>24724286
Shrine maidens are for corrupt and dump. Too haughty to make into wife, too weak to make you take responsibility.

>>24724460
Undead Republic is fine too.

>>24724440
Something cute this way comes.

>>24724386
Very.

Wanna find a secret research facility then start terrorizing the scientists with a shoggoth

>>24724519
Now flex!

>>24724286
Western faith breasts won't lose!!

>>24724580
Do you have something to confess?

>>24724286
i prefer my shrine maidens to have modest chests

>>24724519
Oh no! She’s PERFECT!

>>24724549
>terrorizing the scientists
For what reason.

>>24724519
She's cute, would hold on to her arm while we walk.

>>24724580
This is true but the eastern clergy bind their breasts to appear more modest.
Its why even some shrine mice maidens may have massive breasts in secret.

>>24724491
It's the only way.

>>24724602
I touch myself at least three times a day while thinking of Sister Mary!

>>24724602
The pale sister seems far too fascinated with my lewd confessions!

>>24724653
>Shrine Maidens may have massive breasts in secret

>>24724286
"As you once did for the voluminous Nefertiti, grant us milk, grant us milk!"

>>24724557
>How to make Buffcubus smug in two words.
You're getting aggressively hugged after she's done showing off Anon. Imagine those strong arms around your head, as she pulls you into her chest.

>>24724286
I like demon/succ knights, but a shrine maiden is fine too

>>24724714
An Nefertitty, the first chosen of Hathor.

>>24724643
I wanna pretend I am in some horror story. Ideally I pretend that we are the result of some experiment that has gone wrong.

Last night I had a dream where I was still living in my mom's house and I was married to this one girl I used to know.
Weird shit, Nightmare-chan. Weird shit.

>>24724404
Made for eating out while she is working

>>24724765
>I wanna pretend I am in some horror story
So real life just isn't enough for you, is it?

>>24724655
>>24724491
It's just run by rich undead families anyway

>>24724730
Sounds terribly nice.

>>24724689
Well yeah, what do you think they meant by the carrying of burdens?

>>24724800
No, because in real life I am on the receiving end.

>>24724822
>Terms are held for unlife.
>New leaders are only elected once the old decide to abdicate.
>It's almost always their children anyway.

>>24724901
Just move to Vancouver and pretend to be a ma'am while invading women's restrooms.

>>24724792
Where does she get all those wonderful knives?

>>24724948
I wonder how the "it's ma'am!" scene would play out with a freshly converted Alp

>>24725035
Make her comfy with her alp'ing through rough babymaking sex!

Comfy night with Lich-san, consisting of cuddles and Bad Boys II

>>24722144
They want us to have plenty of rights, just not the right to not become a incubus or monster.

>>24724531
I want to keep impregnating her forever and have lewd wedding ceremonies with her. I want to cum inside her so much and lick tongues with her while we kiss while she has twins inside her.

>>24725321
Someone could get jealous.

>>24723761
Don't help her anons. She got herself into that situation she can get herself out!

>>24725272
>won't allow vanilla
I don't want wings, coils, or an entire horse body getting in the way

>>24725386
Plenty of monsters can accommodate that. Just direct yourself to the majin types.

>>24725353
>it's actually a trap to make you grab the bulb and "accidentally" get pricked by one of the barbs
Clever girl.

>>24725348
I willing to be Gensoukyo's husband and marry and impregnate all the girls if they want to.

>>24725446
as expected of an apex sexual predator

>>24725439
>kej

>Go into a Greilia clinic for a cough or chest pain
>The first things they do are inspect your loins, and prescribe a lifetime dosage of loli cuddles
Are we sure they're qualified doctors, and not just desperate singles in nurse's garb?

>>24725482
Your sacrifice will not be forgotten.

If a Shirohebi travels back in time to prevent a disaster or something, does she become jealous if/when she sees herself with her husband?

>>24725386
Tell me about it. I just want to be myself.

>>24725527
That's an insult to the Grelia Sabbath! They specifically only let in monsters that actually want to do more than get laid.

>>24725548
That's how you fry white snek's brain

>>24725566
What makes you think you won't be?

>>24725548
Trust nobody to leave your hubby be, not even yourself!

>>24725610
Shirohebi_pointing_gun_at_herself.jpg

>>24725566
Ultimately it's your fantasy Anon, if you don't want to change much in it, you don't have to, but your waifu will love you for it.

>>24725023
Magic!
the village minotaur smith

Kissing a dullahan head at home while the body is on duty!

>>24725707
Put her head on a headless mannequin and dress it so she can have a substitute body.

>>24718094
They are fully sustainable too since they can always drain their enemies HP to stay in the fight

>>24725571
>Medical practices used by the Sabbath often lead to sex
>Sex in MGE effectively locks a monster to a single man forever
>This contradicts the standards of doctors trying to help as many people as they can
Their careers are a one and done. After their first treatment, they just become a standard monster wife with healing powers.

>>24725792
You clearly haven't read up on the Grelia Sabbath. It's quite a bit more complex than that. https://monstergirlencyclopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Monster_Girl_Encyclopedia_World_Guide_III:_Sabbath_Grimoire#Pharmacomancy_.28p120.29

As an example, married monsters can perform some of the spells by using another monster to inscribe the spell. To quote:

>On the other hand, since monster pharmacomancers who already have a husband will not permit any other man to have intimate contact with their skin, by using “operate (p.123)”, which is mentioned later, they employ this spell through other women by utilizing the method of inscribing the spell formula of “medical cure” on unmarried human women and monsters, or if the patient is already married, on his spouse.

So no, their careers are not "one and done."

>>24725792
This is why you get healed by a momster.

>>24723761
Manticores can't rape you if they get stuck on the banister.

Does your waifu say swears?

>>24725966
No. I'm glad she doesn't.

>>24725770
I want to be utterly dominated and drained by a powerful wight warrior/sorceress

>>24725966
On the rare occasion that she stops hovering, and ends up stubbing her toe on something, yes.

>>24725770
>>24726083
>Fear, but also an erection

>>24725966
She tends to use insults of varying degrees and directed at various persons.

But she only swears when she's really angry.

Do you trust Runya to never try and have sex?

I want a harem of submissive p'orcs to breed in the stables, and a h'orc to take me to bed in the actual house.

How do you get rid of rata infestion?

>>24726213
Say you no cheese.

>>24726176
Maybe you could trick her into it if you "accidentally" get envenomed by a basilisk or manticore spine and only she can relieve you.
It'd start with paw stuff naturally but once she gets into it who knows.

>>24726176
If you stick it in, she'll start milking you automatically even in her sleep.

But other than that you should be fine. Just don't get tempted, no matter what her subordinates might say or do.

I want my waifu's big fat fucking tits in my face and my other waifu's smug mouth locked around my cock.

>>24718094
wait what happened to my little lich chan?

>>24718094
Wight power!

Nerdy wans

>>24726283
Just how far would they go to get you in bed with Runya?

I'm going to go to the Pharaoh and demand she let my people go!

>>24726362
Hungry Wolf!

>>24726365
A team of familiars would recruit and groom you expressly for that purpose.

>>24726203
Why not have the horc out in the stables too so you can breed her there?

>>24726375
But Anon! She'll take you in return! Are you sure you can handle her?

>>24726399
Wow, the "1000 year old lolis are the real pedos" meme is certainly coming out alright.

>>24725966
She does have a tendency to misuse the Lord's name. Usually in the bedroom.

>>24726401
Not him but I can't.

That wouldn't stop her from making me her husband would it?

>>24726375
>tfw I like pharaoh girls but I’m Jewish

>>24726401
So this is what happens if I mess up when calling out her many titles

>>24726401
I guess she figured out anon was lying about the plagues he was going to call down.

>>24726401
with's that thing sticking out of her lamia tail covered in bandages?

>>24725966
She always uses cutesy PG swear words while I sound like a sailor when I talk.

>>24726478
Periscope. It's a miniature submarine in wrappings.

>Want my waifu to bully me
>But I don't want her to know that I want her to bully me
>But I'm pretty sure she already knows
>So she'll bully me to try to get me to admit that I want her to bully me
>But I want that anyway
>I just don't want to admit that I want that
It keeps going around in circles, till I get exhausted and we just cuddle

>>24726401
I love how her pet cobra is like "Mistress, do I really need to be here for this?"

>>24726400
She goes to the stables whenever I'm still horny after she's all tired out from riding me.

https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/82941003

>>24726401
This definitely looks like koburatuisut's work, but I don't recall seeing it before and it's not among their recent posts on twitter. Where'd you find it? Perhaps it's an old one I just never saved.

On the other hand, looking let me find this very big charybdis. I do adore how this artist gives forgotten monsters attention.

Anon, what's Cunny Premium Magazine with Kurofufuru's cunny personal care tips doing in my mail?

>>24726630
It old

>>24726644
Strange, I thought I had saved all their old art that I liked.

>>24725548
>come back home from an errand
>find your wife catfighting with herself
>run to grab the crossbow and silver bolts
>can't tell which one to shoot
>demand they tell you somehting only your wife would know
>they both go into an uncomfortable amount of detail about every facet of your life
>including things you didn't tell them
>and things that happened long before you met her
>and even some things you didn't know about yourself
>both of them are now gushing to each other about how great you are, so you decide to go to the bar and wait for all this to be over
they're both waiting for you when you get home

>>24726401
No I can barely handle how my wisdom teeth hurts because its coming out.

imagine being hired by a billionare lilem to be her personal living dildo

>>24726737
Yes, "hired"

>>24726428
Runya gives of the feeling that she's pretty young for a Baphomet, like a young adult in real age.

>>24726737
I wish I could live on Limbux

>>24726737
Awful. If I'm getting claimed by an MG, they better do it right. Especially something strong like a Lilim.

All that magic and she PAYS me to stay with her? Pathetic!

got a panda comm https://i.imgur.com/t7ucLQH.png

>>24726768
flexible

>>24726768
Nice Panda.

>>24726768
I want that panda to sexually harass me

>>24726768
Got to keep the panda population up

>>24726401
>You're bound in magical wrappings.
>You can't see.
>All you can feel is her.
>All you can smell is her.
>All you can hear is her.

>>24718094

What monstergirl would panic at the slightest hint that you were sick?

>>24726931
Undead

>>24726891
Please stop. You're making me nervous.

>>24726940
She live through the black plague or something?

>>24726891
>>24726945
>QUEEN'D.com

>>24727077
Are there applications to be in the Wight category videos? Asking for a friend.

>>24726891
Heaven! She is a goddess after all

>>24726930
I'd spend an entire day having sex with her

>>24726945
No need to be nervous, she just has to be thorough enough that by the time she is done you never forget how good it felt.

https://pastebin.com/eSNRe0pe
Heres an (unfinished) Story I was writing that some people found in my pastebin, so I updated it a little.
Synopsis: A Doctor in the woods comes across an injured harpy, and he makes it his mission to fix her up. Hilarity ensues.

>>24727438
Damn good job on the update, Anon.

Time for cuddles!

>have an abnormally large cock and balls and it aches for some reason
>momster is very concerned about your penis and how you can't fit in any pants, so she takes you to the "doctor"
>the doctor claims that to proceed with the procedure to fix my genitals she needs the momster to leave
>when she leaves, monsters like demons, wights, and other sophisticated species, in nice suits come in for some reason reason
>end up getting molested and then raped by the "doctor" and her politician/billionaire friends, taking turns or going in groups
>penis still isn't fixed and it's become permanently erect ever since your momster started taking you to the doctor only to get violently raped
sucks being the only source of stress-relief in town, especially when your the only sexual jackpot for everyone

>>24727513
>Lives alone in a cabin far from town
>Attention depraved
>Developed a yandere attitude
>Will most likely keep you locked inside
>Minimal amenities
>Running water: Negative
>Gets abnormally hot
>Likely to be a sweaty, smelly girl with stinky breath
Where the fuck do I sign up?

>>24726676
>spoiler
I would be afraid of future me attacking myself

>>24718094

>>24727438
Enjoying it so far, thanks anon.

>>24727637
Huge chi orbs.

>>24726931
Khepri. So many kings throughout history died to illness.

>>24726931
CC that just got you

>>24726931
Bicorn worried that one of the human sluts she set you up with wasn't clean.

>>24726930
>RATA Breaking News
>local Unicorn goes to sex shop for lingerie for her husband!

>>24726930
I'd fuck the cute succubus from next door in front of her.

>>24727637
Cute mouse

I want to be a young gentleman and pleasure old and milfy monsters

>>24728193
Ara?

>>24728234
Yes. Ara, indeed.

When I'm an old man I wanna be the town grandpa to a bunch of young monsters assuming I manage to get to old age and stay single

Monsters have an instinctual and intuitive understanding of human boy sexuality. In fact they understand the sexual desires of any human boy better than he does. Therefore monster on human boy rape doesn't exist and it is more of a "proactive sexual service" .

>>24728275
So what are you gonna be the wacky old man that declares him self the self appointed emperor of the realm or maybe you challenge all the youngsters to a rock skipping contest but only do so on a beach with no flat rocks? Then during the winter you dress up like Santa? Man being an trickster old man would be fun

>>24728000
>Now to World News
>Pregnancies skyrocket in Ulthuan! The Queen of the Elves denies there is any correlation between this and a recent fad in Human Male servants in the Kingdom.

>>24728275
Be a teacher. What's the worst that could happen?

>>24728383
I'd have fun teaching them Home Ec, though I might need to get special sewing machines for the more monstrous students and I better make sure to let the arachnid monsters that they have to use the machine and thread provided not their own silk. Then for cooking classes I better make sure there is enough room in the kitchen for them all so that each student can do their assigned task maybe only one large monster per cooking area. Though the hardest part would be home finance days where I gotta let the richer monsters know that they can't use their own wealth for this exercise and that we are using pretend money so that we can learn budgeting,

>>24722740
Find yourself a Yeti wife

>>24728445
>Home Ec teacher
How have your monster coworkers not taken you for themelves you are practically the perfect househusband

>>24728885
What if I put myself in a cardboard box with "Please take me home" written on it in MGC?

>>24728234
Fattie

>>24728968
That cute succ is way more attractive than the girl on the left.

>>24726930
Thats a cute uni

>>24729022
Thank you.

>>24726930
I'd spend my entire day with my arm in her ass

>>24728934
Maybe.

>>24729022
I want a Satyros/Faun shaped Unicorn that's the optimal girl

>>24729045
I like the idea of a cute unicorn that wants to do super lewd, monogamous things.

>>24728302
What if a boy has conflicting desires? I've got a few fetishes I'm not sure I'd want my wife to indulge.

>>24729100
Unicorns are the jabberwocks of the centaur family. They'll hook you up with every fetish and desire in the book, except for polygamy.

>>24729067
Very fertile, but almost extinct yokai

>I love cats
>I love every kind of cat
>I just want to hug all of them
>But I can't
>Can't hug every cat

>>24727730
Oi oi...

>>24729117
This. I think piss is hot in porn, but I'd never want to indulge in it.

You wouldn't join a Goblin pirate crew, would you?

>>24729150
That seems a bit of a contradiction.

>>24729217
not that one

>>24729226
She's a survivor they're a dying breed

>>24729131
>When the girls are talking things they'd like to do with their husbands and the uni puts out something more fit for a wonderland girl.
>They're all shocked except the wock who gives a thumbs up.

>>24729150
That's a body built for worship, only thing she's missing is some visible musculature. Toned tummies are the best.

>>24726768
Weird to see a commission censored

>>24729257
>Well you see it's not cheating if I drink a doppel potion so I like to tie him up and run a fucking train on him

can you escape a barometz by eating the fruit?
rape is not sexy

>>24729226
She is one of a kind and have been too busy with scheming. Also she scares away any suitor

>>24729217
I think she's enough booty right there.

>>24729278
She is no warrior yokai. Just a lazy scheming one, albeit very powerful. She is very much up for having a worshipper though

I want to be the head priest of a shrine dedicated to the goddess of chastity and purity and make my goddess proud by staying a virgin for her. I'm sure with my devotion she will reward me with insight into the workings of the universe

>>24718094
Chief God is taking action into her own hands.

what do you think she has behind the door?

>>24729296
To ask some youkai out you need a wheelbarrow to haul your huge balls with.

>>24729352
>I'm sure with my devotion she will reward me
She'd "reward" you alright you always hear about the man corrupting the goddess but this would be a case where the goddess corrupts man

>>24729361
Tech Monthly magazine.

>>24729359
Lenneth?

>>24729371
>He always assumes it's just his goddess testing his faith
>She's actually thirsty as fuck and regrets picking the domain of purity when she sees how her lewd twin sister is having so much fun and has more worshipers

Adveturer Boy/Hero Adventurer. Wat do?

>>24729364
How do you go about asking out this one? Grovel on the ground before her and praise her magnificence?

>>24729409
wrong universe >>>/hbt/ is the next dimension over

>>24729409
Get ignored

>>24729409
Fix sword.

>>24722199
>MGE France

>>24729409
Slimed

Reminder that Hellhounds can't rape you if you want it.

>>24729409
Wait if he's the hero does that make me his jerk best friend that ends up dying

>You'll never the culmination of 100 generations of carefully curated human lineage, the overseer of which now calls you Master

>>24729455
Only if you're lucky. If you're unlucky you become the comic relief character.

>>24729421
VERY carefully. Being good at gardening would also be beneficial. I'm not sure if groveling would do any good. It could amuse her though.

>>24729405
Being that dense around a goddess is not good

>>24729409

>>24729461
>comic relief character.
Nah man that's the best roll in the party nobody expects shit from you so if you are ever remotely competent once that is a bigger impact than someone always competent

>>24729473
It is the start of a divine bloodline I guess

>>24729309
Eh guess it's not a deal breaker. How powerful is she?

>>24729502
Really.

>>24729409
>>24719226
Same guy? Feels like the person who kept finding excuses to post boys they find attractive is back.

>>24729477
Cute horn rings and hair bows.

>>24729450
When a Hellhound tries to rape you, always say "thank you" and give her a kiss.

>>24729556
ear rubbing is good no matter what monster

>>24729282
See, thats the sort of stuff she'd do.

>>24729436
>For the lady!

I'm probably weaker than the weakest monster so it's a good thing I know no monster would take advantage of me cause I'd be powerless to stop her

>>24729587
Very true.

>>24729409
Cute reverse trap.

>>24729696
Would a man alp if he crushed on a reverse trap and thought he was gay for it?

>>24729525
>"She's possibly the most powerful youkai in Gensokyo, and has a tendency to toy with her opponents rather than use her full power from the start."

What a cutie, she's getting molested.

>>24729647
Lots of monsters out there that would find somebody like you very tasty

youkai more like yo-gay OOOOOOOOOH GOTTEM

>>24729710
Attaboy.

>>24729708
Only he desires dick/male cum.
If he's attracted to the androgynous form, it's fine.

>>24729722
She looks like a messy eater she should learn some civilized manners

>>24729728
B U R N

Monsters would be very angry if they watched harem anime know that not every girl wins

>>24729710
In a way she runs the place. Also she comes with two servants. A nekomata and a Kitsune-bi/Inari hybrid

>>24729743
She has been on a long campaign. I mean she got armor on and everything

>>24729764
Shirohebis would love it for the same reason.

>>24729764
They would love Omamori Himari though.
>most the girls are non-human
>canon end is them reverse gangbanging the mc

>>24729792
I want to date twin Shiros

>>24729764
Harem shows not having harem ending is total BS.

>>24721401
Hellhound
Manticore
Holstaur

>>24729817
Would they finish each other's sentences even during sex?

>>24721401
Salamander
Wight
Hobgoblin

>>24729863
That's kinda hot and creepy

>>24729863
>CUM

>INSIDE

>US
>US

>mad hatter invites you to her place
>it's a big castle
>go inside and hear a voice from a evil jabberwock that she's kidnapped your mad hatter gf
>explore the castle filled with rooms that have paintings in them
>they're portals to different worlds where you can collect power stars

>>24729918
Well hatterfag's out for blood now.

>>24729806
>And given he was unconscious for this, the main heroine declares he won't sleep again until they do it.

>>24729918
The Umi Osho there is surprisingly good at racing on land.

>>24729918
>>24729928
Sounds more like a roleplaying session honestly. The Hatter is probably just enjoying tea the Wock.

>>24729792
I want a Shirohebi, a Bicorn, and a Nurarihyon.

>>24721480
What's that? Is it something real?

What if magic combined a Shiro and a bicorn into one person

>>24729918
Kidnap the wock's husband in response.

>>24729968
I'd still love her

>>24729918
>Go to the haunted mansion world
>Across the scary evil piano mimic

>>24729984
she has no husband
that's why she's evil

>>24729918
Sounds pretty fun
>jump into one of the paintings
>no background music
>feel the cold immediately
PAINTED WORLD OF ARIAMIS
Think one of the paintings glitched out

>>24729989
https://youtu.be/8fCx1m0tQT0

>>24729989
Church organ seems sedentary enough for a hatter to enjoy playing.

>>24730002
Not the skeleton wheels, nnooo!

>>24730000
>she has no husband
It makes it sting more when you say "so long, lesbian wock"

>>24729918
>get chased by an apparition of a chomping sandworm mouth down a hallway

>>24730002
>Wock's fluffy cousin is sitting at the end of the painting
>Every painting has a lonely dragon waiting in it.
>Wock just wanted to get her extended family married.
>A harem is better than being alone.

Fuck onis.

>>24730044
I want to live with a comfy fluffy dragon in a cold, dark and very gentle painted world. Maybe not cold and dark all the time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD-y_hckwE8

>>24729968
As jealous as a Shiro, but turned on by it.

>>24729722
Remove Von Carstein

>>24730077
I would if I could

>>24730146
Impregnate them with your commoner spawn!

Manticores are intelligent, nihilistic, and have wicked senses of humor.

>>24725966
She is a dragon, she says whatever she wants.

>>24730202
well thats a meme i havn't seen in a while

>>24730202
For me it's Demons: intelligent, adorable, and have nice thick tails.

>>24730287
BLUE GIRLS

>>24730296
i remember, la blue girl got me into 2d porn.

Is the mosquito kingdom a safe place to visit

>>24730302
>La Blue Girl
>Isn't a blue girl
False advertising

>>24730303
is that a slur for the vampiric realms?

>>24729280
Used a commission site for Jap artists, so they gotta follow the regulations for it

>>24730303
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6uRQ0uslcM

>>24730220
Been seeing it make a comeback here and there on other boards recently. Feels weird seeing it here too.

>>24730381
Huh. I just thought it was funny.

>>24730381
there are certain memes I wish would make a comeback

>>24730357
Vampires deserve my rare blood

How do I draw the ire of The Extremists? Organize peaceful men's rights protests, or would they just find that cute?

>>24725966
Sometimes they will but they have to get decently mad

>>24729900
what would a shark girl that big even do with a man? Eat him?!

>Be p'orc chieftain
>Owner of p'orcer stronghold walled with palisade
>Has all the modern amenities with p'orcer architecture and decoration
>Sitting on your grand throne (a luxurious, glorified recliner)
>Playing vidya with your PC hooked up to the massive flatscreen TV
>One p'orcer to your right serving your hot or ice cold beverages of your choosing
>One p'orcer to the left offering moral support and looking pretty
>One p'orcer below sucking your dick as needed and when you command
>A couple other p'orcers preforming household duties that proper wives would do

>>24725966
Y'know don't say swears

>>24730357
Lies and slander.

>>24730496
The modern tribe chief life

>>24730551
that's a lot of fluffy bats

>>24730398
Sometimes it's best if the good ones stay as fond memories but at least caramelldansen and rickroll are still relevant.
Which reminds me I've been wanting to get a caramelldansen animation commission forever.

>>24730398
like?

>>24730357
I'd rather have a mosquito girl than a normal vamp.

>>24730640

>>24730496
I want a drawing scene based on this

>>24730651
I want a mosquito girl that swears she is a full blooded vampire

>>24730496
I want to see how the "moral support" orc looks