/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>35879206
I require milk.

>>35879225
Is spider milk ok?

>>35879225
I want to visit a convent of dairy breed centaur nuns.

i like maids

>>35879225
I can offer holy mofu milk

>want to like slimes
>know that they’re basically the weakest monsters in the series
>for some reason this makes it borderline impossible for me to actually like them
Guess it just makes me feel pathetic? They’re probably the first monsters you’d see after walking outside of a city so either you’d have to be weak enough to lose to one or weak willed enough to wife the first monster you see

>>35879245
There's such a thing as high level slimes you do know that

>>35879245
I don't hate slimes, but there's only one I consider wife material.

>>35879245
get the best slime

Goth Monsters are in short supply.

>>35879162
I guarantee you that it's better than the alternative.
Look at the shit infesting nearly every other fandom, explicitly excluding gays from the setting does a lot to keep things clean.

I want to get raped by 8 ft tall krakens and smell like squid for the rest of my life

>>35879279
>>35879271
Slimes are practically made to be maids

Does anyone have that one art where a guy gives a hellhound a collar and in the panel he’s the one wearing it?

Having mastered the art of repulsing human women in order to attain my wizardly powers, how do make myself equally unappealing to monsters? I'm half way to being an archmage and don't want to blow it.

>>35879228
Only if I get to take an active role in acquiring it.

>>35878945
>one day, hellhound starts wearing her hair in a scrunchy over one shoulder...

>>35879446
jesus, is your back okay old man. remember not to lift anything or your back might give out

Big titty, tomboy ryu

>>35879464
This is pancake mode for an ushi. Good luck sustaining yourself of those

>>35879446
Marry a Lich, she will gladly help you reach your magic potential and keep whores that want to distract you away from you.

>>35879206

>>35879483
that is no lich, that must be some sort of cow

>>35879206
I want to calm down this excited Yeti with a tackle cuddle

>>35879512
Those are not mutually exclusive.

>>35879481
Just have to massage them a lot while feeding her plenty of holst and man milk, you'll be drowning in milk before you know it!

>>35879520
Ghost moos.

>>35879522
She's a trustworthy cow.
I shall milk her.

>>35879483
>>35879520
Is undead milk good for you?

>>35879571
So good it takes your breath away

Hi, writefagging about a mindflayer at the moment, what would you call the thing they have instead of legs? And what would you think of them being able to give themselves legs?

>>35879601
tentacles or technically "arms"

>>35879545
found one

>>35879601
A trunk? I guess?

>>35879601
For all we know, it may be an organic skirt thing that covers her legs. IIRC, in Another Story of Fallen Maidens, mindflayer!Eristia's lower half appears to divide into a pair of legs in the H-scene.
https://exhentai.org/s/d27742aa69/969946-81

how do you guys feel about 'extra' nipples on your beastgirls?
I'm not sure I'd be into rows of wholeass titties but nips could work, I think

>>35879699
No

>When a young lizardman with beaten, rusty armor carrying a cracked axe shows up to become a part of your royal guard during tryouts.

>>35879699
absolutely disgusting.jpg

>>35879699
One of those things that's not too revolting on its own, but is almost guaranteed to come with disgusting baggage.

>>35879749
Yeah, unfortunately that is very much the case
>>35879724
>>35879737
care to elaborate? just a gut-level aversion, something aesthetic, ?

>>35879774
because its closer to an utter, because an utter is basically a single breast with 4 teats

>>35879667
This works, thanks.

>>35879814
what I'm thinking of definitely isn't multiple nips on each titty- more spaced out than that- but I can tell it's not exactly a fond topic here so I will say no more of it

>>35879814
>utter
Now you've REALLY pissed off the nerd cow.

>>35879854
yeah because youre getting closer to furry tier, if the face and torso doesnt follow general human physiology, its not going to be well received

>>35879814
haku incoming, prepare to be lectured

Alping is like gay bane but perfect paradise for trans.

Give me a dragon zombie greentext

>>35879885
The line between acceptable and non acceptable seems arbitrary and insubstantial, like why don't cat ears be a redflag it is closer to being furry then it not being there. Is it because its such a common trait used that people don't even think about it?

>>35879983
because ears and tails are really benign features, its still recognizably human, as per having a human face

>>35879968
>Dragon Zombie

i want an angry minotaur to punch me in the face!

>>35880013

Any monster girl that doesn't love getting railed up the ass by her husband is just a human woman in a costume.

>>35880243
Need to breed those tall, amazonian forest elves.

What monster girl would be best at helping get over unspecified psychological issues?

>>35880336

It's cold here, I need warm and cuddly monsters

>>35880384

>>35880384
>warm and cuddly
I'm beyond wanting that level of snug.
I want to faceplant into a lava golem.

Good night Anons, take care and don't burn down the thread.

Instead, buff, loyal tomboy kobolds.
Eager to help and some can even rival their werewolf cousins in size and strength

>>35880384
the grape snake will warm you up

>>35880384
Don't fall for the snakeposting, lamias will just steal your heat.

>>35880534
what a kissable face

>>35880601
No, they're more like big, scaley sleeping bags. Don't fall for the antisnakeposting

>>35879239
I don't get it

>>35880384
mofu is your best bet

>>35880700
Hellhound maid I think.

What do hellhound buttholes taste like?

>>35880890
Pussy like grilled meat, ass like charcoal.

>>35880715
STOP. POSTING. ABOUT MOFU! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME TAILS, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING TAILS! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just mofu stuff. I showed my vampion underwear to my boyfriend and the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the mofu is comfy HAHA *angrily dings to the tune of some gay kistune song*" I fucking looked at a Danuki and I said "THAT'S A BIT FLUFFY" I looked at my alp friend, I think of my lack of a sexy tail, and I go "ALP FAG? MORE LIKE FOX HAG!"
HAAAAAAAAAAAAA

vampires are suffering

>>35880959

I hate chink foxes. So overrated and boring.
The gazer and other western mofus are superior.

>>35881022
I was on board with you until the part about the g*zer

>>35881046
What's wrong with gazers? They're cute!

>>35880807
Isnt serving a master kinda antithetical to their being!

>>35880384

>>35880959
Cope and seethe.

>>35880959
it is no longer time for fluffy tail
the age of fluffy paw has come

>>35881004
Fluffy tail stole my burger

>>35881053
I think I agree, but I don't wanna accept it, they seem mean.

>>35881061
Hence the kiki telling her to not mess it up.

>>35881172
They're mean because you like it, if you don't, they won't be mean.

>>35881148
Your fault for leaving the 2nd best fox bait lying around where they could get it.

>>35881188
Makes ya think whats going through the hellhounds head

>>35881148
You bait the mofu with a spare burger anon, then you pull out the reserve for yourself to eat.

>>35881268
The exact times when Master's underwear drawer will be unguarded and sniffable

>>35881268
>Do not blow this for us.
What she hears:
>Do ... blow .his ... ..

>>35880384
alt fluffsnake

How do you tickle an automaton?

>>35881377
with a taser

>>35881377
cattle prods, tazers, and lightning magic

>>35880959

>>35881258
What's the best fox bait then?

>>35881391
>>35881395
>antagonizing the machine
sounds like a bad idea

>>35881408
fried tofu or an unguarded chicken coop depending on locality

>>35881408
Aburaage

>>35881410
i'm very intrigued by those haywire automata on that saida island with perpetual lightning storms

>>35881377
Uhhh stick your uhh, synthetic electro inseminator into uhhh, her model V duralube+ synthetic reproductive replicator?

>>35881426
Make sure to keep a low profile while walking across the lightning fields. If you hear a consistent whirring noise getting closer it's already too late

>>35881377
Analog input to a digital port.

>>35881305
Need a rolled up newspaper to bop her with.

Elf chads
https://nhentai.net/g/367351/

>>35881433
>gremlin has you stick your dick in the mystery tube
>she flips the switch and your dick suddenly feels really good
>after a few seconds, it stops and she pulls it off of you
>your dick is now the same length as the tube, and gremlin is drooling at the sight of it

>>35881410
Anon is just trying to show affection, they would probably get the sentiment even if they are off base.

>>35881466
>white pee this
>white pee that
Seriously why do I keep seeing this line in hentai? Do japs really?

>>35881486
>I have over 12,000 synthetic fibres specialized for cuddling hus-
>Just get in the bed you dope
>Y-yes honey

Something about this monster girl seems suspect but I can't put my finger on it

>>35881524
It's probably nothing. Just whip out your incubus dick for her and she, as a monster, should know what to do with it.

>>35881486
she can show affection too

>>35881490
it's a real boner killer. sometimes i appreciate the language barrier

>>35881524
Seems legit

>>35881524
>>35881584
>desperate human women cosplaying as monsters to try and get men to pay them attention
Truly sad

>>35881596
>there's this really flirty human girl with a nice rack who's wonderful and very into you. she's giving off all these signals, you know she's hiding something
>she pushes you down on the bed and you're waiting for her to reveal she's a demon or succubus or something
>she's not
monstergirl twists on the horror genre

>>35880959
Tail-lets, when will they learn?

>>35881637
Oh god, imagine almost sticking your penis in a h*man woman! The horror! Hold me automaton-chan!

>>35881596
Many such cases

>>35881637
>try to slip your pants back on and excuse yourself
>YOU LIKE RAPE, DONTCHA?
>try to eloquently explain that it's a nuanced subject and the broadest definitions of rape may not adequately explain the imagined romantic encounter with a monster
>get raped
such is life

>>35881667
kek

>tfw you will never have high elf and dark elf momsters

>JiiiiI~

can i keep a wendigo as a pet

>>35881828
>You walking down the street as an elven woman walks up to you and conversation has been initiated
>"You, human! What do you choose, Asur or Druuchi?" she asks demandingly
>"What?" you wonder
>She sighs "Ugh! Okay let me just say it as this. Asur are high elves, Druuchi are dark elves. Now human boy, I will ask you again. Asur OR Druuchi?" she asks again with more demanding demeanor
>What is your answer???

>>35881915
Yeah sure, they're easy.

>>35881916
Answer with literally any other kind of elf, like wood elf.

>>35881916
Is this a Skyrim reference posing as a Warhammer reference?

>>35881965
Todd is getting creative with the psy-ops

>>35882008
Oh fug this isn't the arknights thread. It's got girls with animal ears tho that still counts right?

>>35882049
An ancient evil that awakens other ancient evils!

>>35882061
Is there a “lower limit” to what a monster girl can be like in terms of non human traits?

>>35882096
magical girl, like witches and dark mages are the most human in mge, after that its ears and/or tail, like gremlin which is a demon type with beast ears

Mods are asleep. Post milk

>>35879225
Cute udders bra.

>>35882133
Alright.

>>35882133

>>35879446
Funny, my main concern when considering going full archmage is how to avoid having to fuck any monsters while still capitalizing on the benefits they provide.

What part of humans do you think confuses the average monster girls the most?

>>35882430
Other than kakuens... Ears

>>35882430
The fact that some of us don't want sex, our weirdly short lifespans and fragility, and our tendency towards situations of mutually assured self-destruction.

How do I achieve peace between kakuen banana bandits and the banana farmers?

>>35882459
Just talk like Ray Comfort at the Kakuen.
>Behold! The atheist's nightmare!

>>35879206
Some anon did a gazer-(kraken?) hybrid

>>35882459
You can't, now fork over the bananas or they'll bully you with their butts!

>>35882234
More taur type monsters would be cool

I wanna watch a Werner Herzog documentary about MGs. Which species would he cover?

>>35882803
Your glow in the dark CIA squirrels and their misinformation networks can't protect you from the light of God forever.

I wanna be assigned to the breeding hut in a p'orc camp.

>>35881915
where's the followup to thisnwhere the dad shows up?
also.one of my favorite ln pics is wendidad holding his daughter in his palms. it's cute

>>35882488
Do we consider dragons to be taurs? They have six limbs after all.

>>35882921
I wanna take a handful of p'orcs for myself and turn them into domesticated, brood mothers and be their master.

>>35883140
I can't believe centaurs and dragons are insects.

>>35883140
By that logic angels would be taurs too.

>>35883168

>>35880114
I want one to put me in a headlock and noogie me because I bumped into her by mistake

>>35881906
That's some cool shit.

>>35880601
Pythons, will wrap around their eggs and vibrate their bodies to produce heat from friction, helping keep the eggs warm despite them not producing body heat.
So if a Lamia starts twitching while wrapped around you, she's just trying to keep you toasty.

>>35883140
no theyre just sexapeds

You're gonna get clucked.

>Leave the monsters and them Demon Princesses to me!

>>35882921
What's life in the breeding hut even like?
Basically a one bedroom apartment where p'orc girls keeps coming and and fucking you one after another?

>>35883804
>trips on a dark matter

>>35882914
>Terry Davis isekai'd into MGE

>>35883849
you say that like it's a bad thing

It must be so frustrating for Chief God to see a promising hero lose to a lvl.1 slime.
Seriously, a lvl.1 slime. Losing to lvl. 1 succubus she at least understands, but how can a HERO lose to a mere lvl.1 slime?

>>35884464
Hero that starts out doesn't get access to good spells until he levels up a bit and slimes have high resistance to physical damage.

>>35883564
well guess what?

Echidnas only want one thing and its gross

>>35884779
To be an egg factory?

Mosquito.... erotic.....

>>35884779
>only 2 hair snakes

>>35883804
SEIBA

>>35885247

>>35885177

>>35884721
what?

>>35885272
Seibah has a really high riding skill, right?

>>35885289
chicken butt

>>35885301
Built for rape

>>35885145
imagine being swarmed by these haha,or worse,a group of them pressing themselves on your window just waiting for you to open it

>>35880959
Mofus get the quantity, vampires get the quality

>>35885406
Vampiric kitsune.

>>35885436
I'm talking about their fanbase.

Patricians go for vampires
Plebeian masses go for mofu

>>35885472
is that why old vampires are old hags and still virgins, cause they ain't enough hag love-I mean patricians around for them

>>35885378
Haha imagine if your wife mosquito’s eggs hatched and instead of feeding them breast milk or something she just let’s them cling to you and sip your blood wouldn’t that be cool

Old hag virgins are the perfect combination

A running gag in Tex Avery cartoons was showing the mother-in-law as a menacing figure. Explain how a momster-in-law might be a terror. I'll start with Kiki.

>Kiki momster-in-law comes over to visit
>She notices there is a room that her daughter hasn't sorted
>After she leaves, you find that your man cave has been completely reorganized and you no longer know where everything is

>Your face getting molested by baphomet tongue and covered in baphomet saliva
Yes please

143 cm of concentrated maid

>>35885577
i dont know if thats supposed to be scary or arousing,what if i get dehydrated?

>>35885631
As maids should be.

>>35885567
They're totally virgins of their own choice, they're just waiting for the right guy! Most of them are not starting to consider adopting and raising their own husband, not at all!

>>35885630
Based

>>35885618
Hmmh!

>>35885659
Scarousing. And don’t worry about dehydration, being the incubus husband of a mosquito probably makes you generate huge amounts of blood easily

>>35885762
Kanako is the kind of hag goddess who would talk about rewarding her follower and act cool and calm, but inside be freaking because she didn't expect her follower to actually be able to do it and she's not sure what to do next

That's when she invites you inside the shrine and offers you a handshake.

>when your seed is a bit too potent

>>35885771
>wake up
>you are being pressed down by all your daughers taking their blood breakfast
>the buzzing sound rings on your ears nonstop
Fuck that noise

>>35879206

>>35885771
>>35885659
It’s literal infants, that is nasty

Jinko lost her pagoda again.

>>35885790
Her hand's all shaky and sweaty.

>>35885682

do elves count as mgs?

>>35885813
They’re just feeding bro don’t worry about it

>>35885762
The umbrella is more likely to get married than her, she needs to get out and visit the village more often

>>35885829
>>35885829
>elves

>>35885829
They are lewd non-human women who can't stop thinking about human dick, so yes.

>>35885846
Elves are BEAUTIFUL and PURE magical forest people and they NEED to be protected from corruption at ALL COSTS

>>35885762
>cute hag
>powerful goddess
>one of the best themes in a series known for great music
>there's the possibility to be a haremfag and bang all three girls at the shrine as a package deal

>>35885886
you mean to dick 'em hard and fast and with no remorse?

>>35885829

i hope someone tells her that her tail is on fire

>>35885682
She might be extra cautious and find a boy as fresh as possible to adopt, like a boy who is about to be born and is already planned to be put up for adoption. She fills out the paperwork in advance and acts as midwife during his birth and walks out with him within minutes after he is born.

>ywn be adopted by a CC monster girl within minutes of your birth

W-Why is Onee-chan looking at me like that?

>>35885793
Best case scenario is the seed is so potent that at some point the "rules" get broken and a human male heir is born. Only way to have full blood related older born monster sisters.

>>35885846
>incelf
kek

I don't want to have sex... I just want to feel love...

>>35886028
There's a skeleton inside you right now.

>>35886028
this
cuddling is good too

I want to travel to the MGE version of the Inferno town for holiday.

>>35885903
>>35885886
Both. Worship and impregnate the elves.

>>35885968
someone is gonna get milked. DRY

Eh, I forgot to ask the guy who replied to me he wants a sleepy mofucore story from a few threads ago. Do you want new characters, or you are fine with me using the ones from my previous works aka Irene and Anon?

>>35885938
I wonder how many get bamboozled into adopting someone well into wizard status?

>>35886062
Ok. Hear me out, is it POSSIBLE for a man to become an incorporeal undead, and have his skeleton resurrected into a monster girl for him to fuck? Canon possible self-cest?

>>35885771
>marry a mosquito
>start cumming blood
amazing and yet terrifying

>>35886132
Ask KC

>>35886132
The skeleton would still be male

>>35886166
No, skeletons become female when resurrected

>>35886169
Alps skeletons?

>>35881377
>computer, set synth skin sensitivity to 10
>computer, set laugh volume to 10
>computer, restrict limb motion to flailing
>and computer, remove safety restrictions

>>35886174
skelobussy

>>35879206

>>35886174

>>35886129
You mean she fills out the paperwork before ever seeing the boy and she later learns the paper she signs was a total lie or she didn't bother reading them and got what she signed for?

Now lets rearrange that. She pre-orders the boy and then when acting as midwife is the first one to learn that he is born crippled.

>>35886176
That sounds like a good time

>>35886117
what if i stick my dick in her tailpussy while she sleeps?

>>35885793
I'm all for having numerous rodent-type monster half-sisters.

>>35886117
Uhhhhh sure

>>35886257
Just remember Anon: you'll eventually be too tired to tickle her, but she'll never run out of energy to take her revenge

>>35886274
I mean go ahead with your characters.

>>35885630
Gross, just kiss her properly.

>>35885793
Anyone got a proper translation of this? Machine translation is giving me gibberish.

>>35886277
Oh no! How could I ever think to challenge a cold immortal machine? Even if that machine is weak to tickling

>>35884248 >>35885247
>giving the /tg/ human girl autist attention

>>35886312
>He doesn't wanna be erotically licked by a beautiful, little girl
ALP

>>35886407
i can't believe anon has such intimate knowledge of /tg/ he knows which poster is which in a completely different thread

>>35886381
>run out of breath tickling your automaton
>she grabs your wrist
>"Computer, disengage finger servos"
>I'm afraid I can't do that, Anon
>safety protocols have not be re-engaged
>stuffs your face into her cleavage before you can reactivate them
>mercilessly smothered and pounded by your angry robowife

>>35886174
Skeletons are less like normal undead and more like golems made out of bones.

>>35885818
Getting an uncomfortably long handshake from Kanako!
Having to pull my hand a bit so she understands she can let go!
Wiping my hand on my shirt since her's was so clammy and sweaty!
Asking her if I can head out now since it's very awkward!
Her saying some weird reply that I can't tell if it's her trying to be cool or young or what!

>>35879206

>>35886449
Fat

>>35886418
You're nowhere near as subtle as you think you are.

>>35886425
>>safety protocols have not be re-engaged
The phrase every automaton husband dreads to hear. Even if she's pouting while saying it

>>35886284
okay, when I'm finished I'll post it here as usual.

>An ancient evil awakens

>>35886528
She's kind of fluffy for an ancient evil...

>move to the frozen ass end of the Yukon to get away from everything
>build your own cabin because fuck yeah
>staying at a hotel in the nearest town in the meantime
>finally make it out to your land, get everything marked out and planned so you can start building
>next day you come back notice a yeti has very clearly marked territory in an area surrounding yours

>>35886546
The sign on her cabin says "Cuddle Shack, all are welcome", one peek inside wouldn't hurt

>>35886546
>has very clearly marked territory
gross

>>35886528
NOOOO NOT THE HUMAN-SIZED CHEST AIEEEEE
HELP ME TEZCATLIPOCA I'M CUMMING INSAAAAANEEEEE

>>35886528
Dick it
What could possibly go wrong

>>35886546
Move to White Agony Creek

>>35886528
just imagine how heavy her horns are

>>35886613
Ancient Evils tend to be extremely possessive and pent-up, so your dick would only be freed from her pussy after at least 3 months of non-stop sex.

>>35886528
Damn I love horns.

>>35886546
Realistically living in a cabin in the snowy part of the world would be the easiest way to avoid getting raped
>monsters generally don’t attack people
>only monsters that are a real threat are glacies and selkies
>glacies just want to harvest your energy without sex and could be easily scared off with fire magic, and selkies are usually stubborn and haughty unless their clothes fall off
>so you could live in a cabin and survive by hunting and fishing and not really have to worry about getting raped at all

>>35886546
>Dark Elf didn't do her research and moved to Great Slave Lake because the name made her think it would be easy to get a slave-consort
>She refuses to admit she made a mistake and would rather die than go back empty handed and face her sisters mockery
>At least that vampire that lives nearby made the same mistake so she isn't completely alone

>>35879206

>>35886613
you spawn a legion of MG who proceed to go on a raping spree across the land and become the king of a previously extinct monster faction

>>35882073
So, like their mom?

>>35886680
Her ass is as big as her chest.

>>35886664
>a man finally comes up to the lake for a fishing trip
>vampire and dark elf practically tripping over each other as they sprint towards him
>corner him on a frozen lake
>devolves into a catfight as they have each claimed him
>while they fight, a selkie pulls the guy under
>vamp and dark elf left staring at a hole in the ice
>go back to their tiny, drafty cabins to skulk

>>35886528
Myria?

>>35886698
It's things like that that prove God is real

>>35886700
If they really wanted a husband they would have dived in after him
>frost dragon flying back from a shopping trip down south to her home in the Arctic sees a dark elf, selkie, and vampire rolling around on the ice and fighting over a man
>laughs and films it with her phone so she can upload it to Mtube later

That's it, I'm giving myself up to science and letting those point dexters do whatever they want to my body

>>35886698
yes, and?

>>35886546
>Aslaug's Hug & Snug (Formerly Anon's)
I tried.

Dark elves can't enslave you if you are too useless

>>35879206

>>35886963
YOU'LL NEVER SEE IT COMING

>>35886948
I wouldn't say that. They're always in need of pleasure slaves and breeders.

>>35886948
nope, whipping shall continue until morale and competence improves

>>35887049
What if competence decreases instead?

>>35885938
On the subject of MG midwives, are there any monster girls who wouldn't make a excellent midwife? They're all supposed to be good at physically handling humans. If a pregnant woman was in labor I can't imagine a nearby monster girl not doing everything they can for her.

>>35879206

It's kind of incredible the stronger and desperate mgs don't just start decimating the slimes to avoid them claiming majority of adventurers

>>35887067
more whipping

>>35887083
I never understood why people want to be adventurers. I just want to chill and work on my crops.

>>35887092
As far as I can tell the main reason to become an adventurer in a monstergirl setting is to get raped by monstergirls.

>>35887105
I want to be an adventurer to see the world and see new and strange monster girls

>>35887092
I want an echidna,i dont think echidnas would venture out of their caves to seek a farmer

>>35887092
I like the idea of trying to explore the world for as long as possible without getting raped
>developing all kinds of tricky spells and enchanted items to help make you faster, let you stun or confuse monsters, or put them to sleep so you can easily get away
>entire time you’re adventuring you get to see all kinds of great sights while also playing a game of cat and mouse with every monster around and leaving a trail of hypnotized and sleeping monsters in your wake

>>35879470

pastebinned it for whoever wrote that nice story, had to change a few choice words in the last section to squeeze it through though

https://pastebin.com/nP4WBvGi

>>35887092
That's what you do after you retire with your wife. When you see a young man traveling with his salamander childhood friend, you take him into the basement and give him an "overpowered ring from the final zone." When he comes back to thank you, you tell him that the ring didn't have any enchantments on it.

>>35887184
Thanks man. I might work that into a proper story on my Ao3 later, didn't expect it to get that long. I can definitely expound upon it though.

>>35887164
>be a farmer
>run out of space in Your basement
>build a new one outside of Your home
>since there's nothing to do, start expanding it
>it's getting kinda big now
>one day a snake lady shows up, claims Your basement is perfect for her to set up a dungeon in
>load her onto a wagon with Your strong farmer arms and drive her out of the village
>she comes back the next day, saying You defeated her, therefore You are worthy of being her husband

FARMING IS FOR WIMPS

>>35887254
>said the manlet skelly from the city

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E7eP_AAVkBAX6p1?format=jpg&name=small
Lewd sword

>>35887254
Well, well, look at the city incubus and his fancy new midland carriage.

>>35886465
lol

>man up and decide to take the bold path of becoming a farmer in MGE
>not even one week into it there's an alraune bulb smack dab in the middle of one of your fields
>you think she might be trying to be sneaky, but it's not like any of the crops have even sprouted for her to blend in with

>>35887320
Just tell her you know she's there and you don't like Alruanes that way.

becoming a farmer is a surefire way of getting raped by a cow, goat, sheep or plant

which is why I became a farmer

Anon; Professional Manticore Hunter and Tailpussy Fister, at your service.

>>35887320
First, you plow the fields, then their mom.

>>35887344
>Tailpussy Fister
Cumming from handholding is embarrassing enough. Get ready to develop an extreme addiction.

>>35887338
>be a farmer in MGE
>help a stray Holstaur with a sprained ankle and host her for a few days
>herd instinct kicks in and other cows start showing up at the farm
>there's 20 holsts, 5 minos 2 ushis and 1 haku on the farm now

>>35887344
Reminder you will become a plaything even to your own daughter

>>35887320
Get some Super-Gro™ Hyper Alraune Fertilizer and dump as many bags of it as you can directly into the soil surrounding her.

>>35887387
Daughteru dicking is cringe and even Manticores would have to abide by my feelings.

>>35887373
Addiction to watching my fluffy wife cum and be embarrassed from simple handholding? Hell yeah I would be. I bet she'd be a major patslut, too.

>>35887344
>Anon! Thank the Chief God you're here!
>there's a manticore in the woods!
>fear not, citizen! I'll handle this!
>Anon procedes to tear his pants off in front of the manticore
>gets ravaged in front of the whole village
>turns out he overstated his credentials, actually just an exhibitionist with a manticore fetish
>still technically stopped manticore from attacking the town

>>35887387
Nah, those little shits will have to find their own boyfriends

>>35887417
Yes but minus the exhibitionism. I'd tear my pants off in front of her in the forest, or in front of her cave.

>>35879206
Cumming inside the tiny womb of a sabbath girl

>>35887320
Tell her that field is for potatoes, and if she doesn't move she will be henceforth considered a potato.

>>35887405
pee pee poo poo ka ka doo doo on you anon

>>35887442
>in front of her cave.
Imagine how terrifying it would be for the poor 'core, minding her own business in her house, when suddenly a stranger kicks the doors in, tears his pants off and screams "I AM HERE TO FUCK YOU".

>>35887448
lolis suck, sabbath sucks, fuck a real woman with great big stonkin tits

>>35887470
And then he just starts furiously rubbing her head

>>35887472
Agreed.

This is going exactly where you think it's going darling

>>35887476
>neetcore in her neet cave, playing some vidya
>when suddenly, BOOM
>She is startled and goes to check
>There is a man
>He sees her and of instead of running away, he rips his pants off, and yells I AM HERE TO FUCK YOU
>He then begins to rush her, the neetcore out of her element, runs
>He catches up to her, looming over her, She is shaking due to never being this close to a man before
> then he pats her head, she is so shocked that she faints

>>35887552
I can think of several places that this could be going. And none of them are bad

>>35887448
This but with a fairy or a pixie

>>35887565
And next I shall introduce her to the wonders of all the weird and somewhat obscure vidya I have.

>>35887338
or the occasional dragon, or roving bands of the undead, or wolves, or orcs

>>35887655
yes
the point is, being a farmer is a good way of getting raped

>>35887663
whats the fastest way to get raped?

>>35887472
Little girls are the best, the sabbath is still kind of boring, fuck a flat-chested true loli and nakadashi her cute pussy and butthole.

>>35887675
it really depends

>>35887675
On a farm?
Just sit out in the open after a day's work.
A young male, tired and sweaty; monsters can smell that for miles.

>>35887678
How's the county jail treating you, buddy?

>>35887699
in general

>>35887710
Oh in general? Go into a dark alley in the city.

>>35887338
I just wanna grow my plants in peace but these plant girls and greenworms keep pestering me to grow even more.
I’m pretty sure both of them are getting off on me planting seeds.

>>35887738
>>35887738
>i'm planting these seeds but not in thee

>>35887738
Greenworms can be dealt with by plantinga lot of collard greens
It'll distract them basically permanently if you replant it.

>>35887552
Dinner then cuddling. Right?

>>35887710
Go into a monster girl city and simply say your single and lonely. I’d give you 7 seconds.

>>35887747
>plant girl watches anon plant seeds into the ground
>”god I wish that was me”

>>35887769
if thats just planting seeds what about watering them

>>35887472
>lolis suck
I'm hoping they do

>>35887820
trolis lolis lick n dick

Loli's sock cause they ain't never gonna get any cock.

>>35887820
uohhhhhh

I bet onis beat the husbands

>>35887861
high elf loli tummy

>>35887820
>>35887828
>>35887861
Favorite loli monster, GO!

>>35887894
Druella

>>35887894
none of them cause lolis dont make my dick hard

>>35887894
succubi

>>35887894
My slime daughter

>>35887894
Same as my favorite overall monster, the Robutt

What are some pickup lines to seduce a oni?
>"I bet i can outdrink you"

Oh no! Kiki is flabbergasted when she 'accidentaly' looked at your browsing history! What did she see that has her so upset?

>>35887993
Upskirt pictures of herself

>>35887894
Wight

>>35887993
my desire to pamper and spoil old maids like her

>>35887993
How much of a slut for tailpussy I am.

>>35887472
>>lolicucks
>tiny dicks
>double digit iq
>find undeveloped children attractive
>find destroying the innocence of children erotic
>universally hated

>>tittychads
>dicks big enough for simuntaneous paizuri and oral
>triple digit iq
>appreciate the wonderful versatility of breasts
>has discovered dozens of objectively erotic things about breasts independently
>respected by both plebs and patricians

>>35887993
Purchase confirmation of a robot vacuum that can also mop.

>>35887993
my face while saying, "I know you went through my computer, no more sex for a week"

>>35887993
>bestiality and loli porn
Haha, surely it’s just a glitch haha I would never

>>35888020
Wisdom.

https://twitter.com/k_cross/status/1420780793392033792
New KC patreon post. This time it's free.

>>35887993
>big minotaurs
>how to meet minotaurs
>mino boobs gifs
>mino abs
>red t-shirts

>>35888020
>not wanting to dickbulge poke out from the cunnymgs.
>not wanting to breed all kinds of monster from small to "gigantic"

>>35887993
>old hag destroy poor shota
>shota potion recpies
>nearest hag city
>more hags raping
>how to flirt with hags