/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>38917660
If I got interviewed by Aya, I'd make up a whole lot of bullshit.

>>38917765
don't worry, she will make up your testimony as well. so it evens out.

>>38917660
O-okay, but you promise you won't rape me afterwards like you dirty Tengu usually do to unsuspecting men, right?!

do i get free eggs if i do this interview?

>>38917806
But anon, if she doesn't then how will she be able to make your complimentary egg for giving her the interview?

>>38917863
Can't she just settle for some eggs bought from the store....?

>>38917913
No. She's kinky like that.

eating all of aya's eggs

>>38918281
I wish. I really really like eggs. Best food on earth.

>>38918281
What do tengu eggs taste like?

>>38917660
Cool, ask away Miss Tengu. I am ready.

>>38918500
Salty coins and milk

>>38917863
>>38918281
What a kinky bird

>>38918500
Like ostrich eggs.

>>38918571
...pomf?

Egg making time.

Which 2hu enjoys reading articles about outsiders the most?

>>38925410
Most of the Kappas would love to read about interesting techs, Yukari would like to hear about unique people and Mamizou would look stuff about business.

>>38918281
Poor Rinnosuke, these same Birds always harass him with their Egg fetishes.

What would I have to do to make Aya fall in love with me?

>>38917660
Oh, okay!
*lean in to her nonexistent microphone*
"...I fockin 'ate the tengu, fokin 'ate fake news fockin 'ate journalism." while directly looking into her eyes, politely.
I wonder what would happen

>>38927437
She would make an Article about what you said and next day in the morning you'll see an Army of Tengu surrounding your House, ready to teach you a lesson.

>>38927437
>what would happen
Hatate would kill herself!

>>38917660
Sorry, but I don't trust reporters nor youkai. I honestly believe you'll twist my words.

>>38918571
Isn't it coins and salty milk?

>>38927505
Don't sudoku yourself Hatate!

>>38927505
I masturbated to this pic

>>38927437
Her cloaca would turn into a waterfall. Your survival isn't guaranteed.

Anayalation.

>>38927505
Depressed and clingy girls are the best. You can do anything you want to them and they won't complain.

>>38927656
What happened to her?

>>38927482
>>38927505
>>38927584
I like how in all scenarios someone dies, thanks anons

>>38928608
Death is good for newspaper

Aya wears white panties.

>>38917660
Please stop bothering me Tengu-sama, I don't like strangers

>>38928980
>why don't we be something closer then strangers then, anon?

>>38928868
Imagine how soft they are for Aya to wear plain panties!

>>38917660
I'm willing to go through with this, but don't expect my interview to be positive. In-between the murderous supernatural inhabitants, the lack of modern conveniences, and the poor quality beds at the inn I'm staying at. This has NOT been a fun stay.

>>38931179
What the hell were you expecting? Dispite all it's supernatural and fantasy-like aspects, Gensokyo still remains a 19th century japanese rural province.

Ok, I will accept the interview, but I have some questions of my own.

1. Ayar, why are you a stinky crow?
2. Does anyone actually buy your newspaper?
3. my friend wants to know if tengu and humans can crossbreed
4. My other friend wants to know if there is any kind of tengu sex ritual that involves a single human man, and every female tengu in your tribe

>>38931627
> Aya, why are you a stinky crow?
Because God made her a Tengu as for the stinky part, its just her natural youkai smell
>Does anyone actually buy your newspaper?
Aya doesn't sell her Newspapers, they're free. Controlling the Informationen flow in Gensokyou and being capable of producing Propaganda/twist the Truth in her and her kins favor in more important then any sum of money.
> my friend wants to know if tengu and humans can crossbreed
They can as long as the Human believes in it. Halfling of all sorts aren't rare in Mythology and Rinnosuke is an example of that being true (Sanae too)
> My other friend wants to know if there is any kind of tengu sex ritual that involves a single human man, and every female tengu in your tribe
Tengu are the most well known rapist and kidnapper in Gensokyo, however Humans of the Village are under protection. Outsider on the other hand are like Faries, one is a fly Onahole the other is a walking Dildo.

>>38931321
This is where being a pajeet will help me.

>>38931321
I was expecting not to get abducted by a certain Gap hag. Since that failed, the least I can do is whine about how shit Gensokyo is to my heart content.

>>38931885
Atleast you survive but yeah fair enough.

>>38931885
If you dislike Gensokyo so much, go give Rumia a hug. She may not be able to use gaps, but she'll send you to a better place.

>>38931928
No, I'm going to visit Reimu to get me out of this shithole. Then I'm going to post a really unpleasant review online.

>>38931179
Futons are comfy you absolute fart

>>38917660
Hi can be interviewed by Hatate instead?

>>38931714
>>38931885
>>38932011
LMAO based

>>38935061
Sorry anon but she's currently in Eientei because she tried to kill herself. You have to make do with Aya.

>>38935625
Oh, okay corvid with hominid features I'll talk. You see in the outside world. We have all these crazy things like water coolers, and paper cups. An we worship two deities named Mario & Sonic.

Us outsiders are force to live under the tyrannical rule of a Japanese super power named Nintendo who really hates it when we listen to music on you tube or on any music sharing platform or even form a competition around their titles. They especially hate it when you make fan-works and will personally send you a genuine cease & deist along with a gun pointed at back of your of head.

Sega was at one point in history an entity rivaling Nintendo & their deity Mario, but have fallen ever since the collapse of the dreamcast, and them not understanding their own masco- i mean Deity sonic, but at-least they're okay with fan content, music and etc unlike Nintendo.
They do what nintendon't .

is that good?

>>38936771
"...whats a you tube?"

>>38931885
you know you can visit Reimu and go back right?

>>38939619
A god forsaken website where people upload incredibly unfunny videos.

>>38939713
I intend to. But she's busy at the moment and I'm stuck here until she can send me back.

>>38925299
Aya has decided that your kids are all gonna look like her

>>38925299
What is she saying?

>>38944747
I don't want to settle for Aya

>>38944823
I hope you're ready to dress like rainbow puke because certain blue bird still hasn't gotten over the regret of betraying her ex

>>38945435
The traditional ceremonial garb of my people should be close enough!

>>38944747
I didn't agree to it. I perfere other 2hus

>>38945717
>I didn't agree to it.
Tengu are notorious rapists, so saying stuff like that is only going to make her hornier.

>>38945894
Isn't she supposed to ne the nice one?

>>38917660
I'll agree to let myself get Interviewed if I get to go balls deep and cum in you

>>38946688
That's just an act.
She is a journalist, lying is second nature to her.

>>38917660
Fine ask away Mis

>>38946688
She is one of the nicer Youkai.

Most of them would rape and then eat you.

>>38950354
i would like that

>>38946688
shes also kindof a notorious bitch

https://youtu.be/NEF2PzUtwy0

>>38925299
Oh no but have milked me so many times

>>38920025
anon, what are we gonna do on the bed?

>>38917660

Ayayan

>>38917660
If you want my truth, know that death is the proof of life.
To live is to die, that much is certain. Accept the cessation of your functions, youkai or human. Predator or prey.
And then find happiness. That is my wisdom, Aya. Now kill me or don't, but publish my article, because you know you will die eventually.

>>38971381
Anon, you should become a philosopher. We need someone like you to piss and shit on the Streets of the Human Village.

I want to scramble the eggs of her insides with my cock, this stupid sexual tengu. So bad.

>>38978940
Becoming the gensokoyo equivalent of Diogenes and shitting in front of sages while also mocking them at the same time.

>>38979541
Most youkai are actually humans, as they are featherless bipeds.

>>38978940
>We need someone like you to piss and shit on the Streets of the Human Village
Would it sadden Aya if I said this is already what she does, and compared her newspaper to human waste?

>>38979583
The best part about this. I could totally see the majority of them believing this.

this better be worth it

>>38979541
And what's stopping at least 2 out of the three from killing you or breaking your bones is?

>>38982116
They can't stop me I'm Diogenes.

>>38982257
Anon thats not how this works

I Imagine Anon shitting on all Religious Groups in Gensokyou and pocking holes in thier Logic. I'd read it.

>>38983279
Funny thing is, that could be actually lethal to them if you explained them how they couldn't exist.

>if
too bad wannabe dogman here has only the brain of a dog

>>38983279
>>38983403
Anon would misteriously disappear shortly after spreading his nonsense to the villagers.

>>38983940
He would then reappear as a Vengeful Spirit and shit on Yukari as it's Traditional before going around telling people his bullshit.

I'd imagine Anon talking shit about Tradition, Religion and other stuff to a Crowd and then once he's finished, proceed to Mastubate furiously and take a shit in front of them.

>>38983990
Doesn't anon want people to stop believing in Gensokyo gods? I don't think anyone is going to take him seriously if he starts shitting on the village's streets.
If anything they might kick him out of the village, where he'd have no protection against the gods he was badmouthing just a few moments ago.

you couldn't even shit on chen

>>38984052
They are joking around about Anon becoming Gensokyou's Version of this Guy (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-A3IlRATIsI&feature=youtu.be))

>>38944823
yeah, aya will never be promoted
you deserve better, anon

>>38985149
It's not bad.

>>38979541
Kasen doesn't deserve such a thing. She's at least stands with humanity, which is more than the other two can say.

>>38917660
who cares about outside world human perspectives? outsiders are food and nothing else

i wish to make eggs with this bird
im sorry my human brethren... but i am betraying you for youkai pussy

>>39024159
here's your Aya bro

Never forget the 6 million 'Gu's

>>38925410
Yukaribel.

>>38917660
Okay so I uh sneed a lot.

Always the best, no matter what.

>>39024387
Ah an improved Aya, let's keep it this way.

i really wanna have eggs with a birdhu

>>39021410
>im supposed not to want to ejaculate inside and all around this

>>38917660

>>39029133
This old hag knows how to flaunt herself

>>39024680
'Gu's?

>>39068208
Okay. The joke here is that he substituted out the word "Jew", as often used in anti-Semitic rhetoric about the Holocaust as "Gu's", referring to a shortened form of the word "tengu", of which species Aya is a member.

>>38917660
Let's talk about the crimes of the Tengu, of which there are many.

>>39077510
Raping humans when they should be the ones getting raped by humans.

A Tengu Reporter?

AYA THE TENGU REPORTER!?!

>>39078536
She has visibly pointed ears, how could they not tell

>>39079817
Listen, you can't just go around judging people by the shape of their ears. It's the modern era, you can't do that kind of thing anymore. How would you like it if I judged you by the shape of your ears Anon? Wouldn't feel good, would it?

>>39079817
She hides them in her bobcut

>>39079817
She wasn't wearing the tengu hat

>>38917660
Go bother Sanae.

is aya strong enough to carry the fattest /jp/ user while flying?

>>39090910
Anon, not even Superman is strong enough to do that.

Miss Aya, I know this is a personal question, but how often do crow tengu lay eggs?

>>39091017
>As frequently as we, uhh, you know...
>well what i want to say is tengu lay eggs in the same way as human women have children, you know, after getting pregnant

>>39092428
Cool! Well why don't you show me how one is laid?

Rather, why don't you and I get... laid

>>39131002
What happened to Aya

>>39131301
She slip an fell into a puddle, a very deep puddle.

She won't report it...

>>38917660

>>39101042
That was awful, anon. Unless you're trying to make Aya laugh, I suggest you come up with something better.

>>39144615
Fine. Aya, sex, now.

>>39132581
I don't get it.

>>39161099
nice thighs, miss aya

>>39161099
Does she sit like that to intimidate people who can't?