/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45318390
>How would you escape before she goes off the deep end?
I wouldn't
>What anti-yandere measures could you take to defend yourself?
I couldn't

I'm unable to see this pure maiden in a bad light. She's just too precious for that.

>>45318390
The more I resist the more painful it's going to be so I'm just going to give in. My wife Hatate has the ability to make everyone spit on me in disgust and even send them into a murderous rage with just a few clicks on her T9 phone keyboard. Worse yet, she can do that without even looking at it and under a second.

>>45320654
What does she want?

>>45318390
I'd try running, but it'd be no use. She'd eventually catch up to me and kidnap me at hakkeropoint. For years from then, I'd serve as her personal spouse-punching bag hybrid, being fed nothing but spiked milk and chocolate cake made with aphrodisiac batter.

>>45320794
She's tiny, just put her up in a high shelf.

>>45320794
How long do you expect to live?

>>45318390
>Who is your favorite hu?
le funi ghoste
>How would she behave if she was a yandere?
Every mortal woman, youkai or human, suddenly dies
>How would you escape before she goes off the deep end?
I can't. Maybe Shiki Eiki could stop her, but I would have to meet her somehow first.
>What anti-yandere measures could you take to defend yourself?
Have a feast. Quietly run away telling her that I had to use the facilities.

>>45320847
A year or two of unbearable suffering!
It'd be so hot!

>>45320857
>Maybe Shiki Eiki could stop her, but I would have to meet her somehow first.
All the dead people dying of dubious causes in a small period of time would surely make her suspicious enough to investigate. Question is, is she immune to the power?

>>45323610
probably, a yama is more like a divine spirit and aren't alive in a normal sense

Yandere Patchouli be like
You have to read Pride & Prejudice and write a 2000 word essay about it or I will kill you

>>45324947
Nah, more like read the Three Books of Occult Philosophy then demonstrate your understanding of the content.

>>45324947
>>45324979
zzzzzzzzzzzzzz....

>>45325022
You know what, I think Patchouli would understand that the object of her affection isn't a dweeb like she is and maybe that's what she likes about him. She wouldn't want him to be the same as she is because then he wouldn't be the same person.

>>45320794
That doesn't seem very healthy. Would she at least make you eat something green once in a while?

>>45325095
The best she can do is shrooms.

>>45325094
still, can you imagine Patchy the Lazy Yandere?
>She wants to do all those evil and maniacal stuff...
>... but she's just so lazy and procrastinates so much she always forgets

>>45325111
NOOOOOOOOO!! SHE WILL MIDGETIFY ME!

>>45325213
End up interacting with Koakuma more because that is who she sends out to handle it for her and Pathouli eventually has to banish her back to hell once she notices that Koakuma and her man are getting too close for comfort.

>>45325220
It's okay, you're already grown so the poor diet won't stunt your growth like it did to her.

>>45318390
I like the fox
Ran would probably be very controlling, citing her supreme intellect, and would try to bulldozer her new hubby into compliance
Ran is one of the great powers, there is no escaping from the fox
Ran is overwhelmingly stronger than a human on top of magic so the only defense against harm is to keep her happy, i.e surrendering

>>45325577
She tries very hard to keep you from interacting with Yukari.

>>45325595
1 night, he'll forget even Ran's name.

>>45325223
Fuck off

>>45325673
Ran already has a canon rebellious streak
if she's neck deep in yandere love, that might get Yukari killed

>>45325693
The condom is intact, how did she do it?

>>45318390
If I wasn't 100% screwed before then I am now.

>>45325704
syringe from the open end, assuming it wasn't tied shut

>>45325703
Not unless she can figure her way out of the tentacle rape dimension!
If it's a duo yankari / yan yankumo, ran is going to be mogged by the fujo sage herself.

>>45325704
Put the syringe into the condom, pulled the sperm into it, removed the needle, and placed cum straight in her womb.
NEVER let them provide condoms or keep them after you're done, you are never safe.

>>45325723
all these condom manufacturing defects
those companies need to work on their quality control

>>45325703
>Ran already has a canon rebellious streak
Where?

>>45325723
God, Hatate would be the best yandere.
Emotional manipulation would be a piece of cake for her, because you'd feel like utter shit leaving her even if she wasn't obsessed with you.

>>45325721
Ran is just as smart as Yukari though and has confirmed successfully hidden her past from her for the better part of a millennia
Yukari isn't going to get any warning before the seals clamp down on her for good

>>45325745
all those times she willfully violated orders, and now in the recent game not only hiding information from the hag for centuries but also lying to her face

Sagume is terrifying as a Yandere, for she can bend you into absolute compliance by the mere act of using her words carefully. Unlike other hus, she wouldn't even have to resort to violence. The mere act of threatening to permanently shackle your free will would be enough. There is no defense against her once she has become obsessed over you, and running away is pointless.

>>45325753
I'm sure Yukari has planned for Ran's betrayal regardless of how improbable that scenario may seem.

>>45325883
sleep for a while?

>>45325888
She can sleep so comfortably because she knows anything that goes wrong during her slumber already has a counter in place.

>>45325906
>goes to sleep
>gets your brain gapped to the sun
how's Yukari countering that?

>>45325883
>>45325906
we've gotten it from multiple characters, Suika most notably, that despite how aloof Yukari acts, she's just an ineffectual sperg

>>45325946
>despite how aloof Yukari acts, she's just an ineffectual sperg
Damn, I can't believe that Yukari is literally me...

>>45318874
Be careful not to jinx yourself

>>45326535
don't slander her like that! That's Parsee pulling a silly prank. Yuugi would NEVER be like that.

>>45326574
You don't want her to love you so much she would do literally ANYTHING to be with you?

>>45326621
no

>>45318390
She would probably always insist on drinking together, which would not be bad if she didn't insist on doing it everyday. At some point I would have to convince her that I'm either going to need Kasen's medicine box to turn me into an oni myself, cop a Hourai elixir, or find some other way to gain an indestructible liver if she expects me to keep up without dying. I would stress to her that I would love nothing more than to spend everyday with her enjoying our lives to the fullest but I just physically can't as a mere human. I would do whatever I could to help in the endeavor myself even if it's not much but it must be done for both our happiness.

Realistically, I am likely to drive her away with my own obsessive behavior because I am not a mentally healthy man when it comes to matters of love.

>>45326535
>She breaks you out of jail
What a nice woman

>>45326621
yes, I do.
But love is give and take, so I'd give as much love as she gives, ultimately cancelling her yandereness.
Otherwise, if she turns into a yandere, it just means I'm not giving as much love as I'm taking
shameful display if your waifuhu is a yandere, anon

I can’t imagine her being a yandere even if she was she’s a shorty so I can just pick her up and chuck her

>>45318390
Its not about favorite, its about who ever happend to take intrest in you when it comes for yanderes. And only way to protect yourself in gensokyo is just other hus which like you enough to do so, which also might be just yanderes or possible no one cares enough.
If i have to pick one i guess futo or koishi, for my favorites.

>>45326689
as if she's not coming back every single time. She's a resilient honorary kappa (good version of yamawaro)

>>45326706
You are right. A yandere scenario would have little to no conflict if it involved someone you would have accepted anyways.

Better question is what you would do if your least favorite was the yandere.

>>45326649
Samesies!

I am expecting her to combine sex and murder into a new form of adrenaline - infused bliss.
Long walks in the garden, looking for fairies to brutalise, use as living dummies, target practice etc.
And the best part is no one can stop her!
No one!
No. One.

If the yanwolf tengu of the mountain goes into heat...
It'll be over for me...

>>45326832
It's okay, just stay hydrated.

it's physically impossible for my 1 inch wife to be a yandere!

>>45326714
>Better question is what you would do if your least favorite was the yandere.
What's in store for me?

>>45326974
she'll force you to continuously impregnate her, then eat your offspring in front of you

>>45326974
Aw, what do you dislike about her?

>>45326706
Feels like an incident.

Imagine waking up one day to find the kind bookstore girl making some very unwarranted physical contact and the sweet schoolteacher following you around in the store. She says it’s just because you both have similar lists, but she never gets anything from the shelves.

To make matters worse, while heading up to the Moriya Shrine to pay respects, some of the mountain youkai are stalking you. Then, once at the shrine where you think you’re safe, the green shrine maiden and the gods all keep trying to get you to stay for tea.

And it just continues to snowball from there…

>>45326992
Eugh.

>>45327057
She's creepy and too unhinged for my taste. I might get injured from getting it on with an oni but I for sure will suffer a fate worse than death if Seiga finds me cute. She's hot as fuck though, can't lie.

>>45326659
You are a mentally stable man.

>>45323610
Eiki is beyond life and death, Yuyuko cant do anything to her. I doubt should be able to do anything to Yuyuko however. She is perfectly impartial and thus wouldnt stop Yuyuko because she must not intervene in matters that doesnt involve her role as judge.

>>45327188
I don't know, I think Yuyuko abusing her powers like that and disrupting the natural flow of death would disturb someone in the underworld chain of command even if it's not Eiki.

>>45327223
Yama presides over the hell realms and Yuyuko rules the netherworld, I think they would be on equal footing

>>45318390
i've got nowhere to run to

>>45327258
Go where she least expects to find you: right into the gap realm. Like when she pops up just jump right in.

>>45327223
Yuyuko would need to do a mass extinction event for that to happen. Every 60 years it is expected to see an increase of souls clogging the Sanzu. I still doubt something would be done because nobody is in charge of imparting justice or balancing life and death, or at least as far as Im concerned in Hell.

>>45327290
She wouldn't need to kill every woman in Gensokyo to have Anon to herself anyways. She just needs to whisk him away to her place which is inaccessible by most.

>>45320857
there is a very easy measure you can take against her, hide in a church or temple

>>45324979
>>45324947
Patche would make you read some weird occult esoteric shit you'd see on /x/.

>>45327278
>jumping into the hagzone
This is the equivalent to doing a sultry pose with a rose in your mouth to her.
Think of Reimu's feelings.
Think of the despair she will go through when gappy shows up at her shrine with 5 mini-gappies.

>>45318390
I'll just call Reimers and get her put back in her box

>>45329334
The audacity would stun her for a second.

>>45330323
A 1 second stun is not exactly a lot.

>>45329786
She refuses, citing the feeling that she felt in her bones regarding Mima's return. It's time.

>>45326901
you'd be surprised

>>45331183
Exactly, she would be like a smarter wasp with that needle of hers, and she would be sneakier than one too.

I don't think you can escape her for obvious reasons

I want miss Meiling to look at me like this

>>45332891
What did you do to get put in jail so she has to rescue you?

>>45332849
I don't think Kanako and Suwako will be very happy with the mess.

At this point im so affection-deprived ill take a yanhu

>>45333004
they're already used to Sanae being a sloppy eater

>>45333008
Alright but you have to take Wriggle. You cannot take back what you said.

>>45333017
Whats wrong with wriggle?
I'm not well versed on the wriggle lore

>>45333029
It's wriggle

in all of these problems why couldn't you just go ask Reimu for help?

>>45333082
Reimu is too busy in her own lovenest with her favorite kidnapped Anon to help

>>45333082
She doesn't give a fuck what they do as long as it doesn't disturb the status quo.

>>45333286
or kidnap villagers, sadly all Anons are just that, outsiders. I know for a fact 99% the dumbasses here will beeline straight to their favorite hu without a care in the world

>>45333314
It's okay, their yanhu will protect them.

>>45333082
But Reimu is the yanhu for me so I can't really ask for her help in dealing with her now can I

>>45333432
Then ask yourself, do you want to be helped at all?

>>45333445
No

>>45333615
A cooperative husband is sure to make her treat him with more kindness!

>>45325673
Yukari is an autistic hag that finds it difficult to socialize and make friends. Meanwhile Ran has the charisma to get a bunch of people whom she barely knows to fly a home made rocket to the moon. Salesman, politicans, marketers and propagandists should be praying to her for a good silver tongue. Foxes are also the yokai of sex and seduction. There are legends of men instantly falling in love with foxes and abandoning their families just so they can live with their fox. They'''re they're of course also excellent tricksters and manipulators. Ran doesn't have to worry about Yukari at all. If anything it would be the other way around.

>>45318390
>Who is your favorite hu?
Yamame.
>How would she behave if she was a yandere?
Definitely trapping me up in her webs any time she's left alone, and also I wouldn't put it past her to use her ability somehow to make me incubate some really nasty disease with a warning that if I do get away I'll really regret it. But lots and lots of web bondage, and lots of threats to end up like a male spider after breeding a female spider. And I bet she'd try to have a lot of babies too to try to baby trap me.
>How would you escape before she goes off the deep end?
Escape?
>What anti-yandere measures could you take to defend yourself?
not happening

>>45333857
Yukari has one thing she doesn't have. Style.

One thing I wonder about yanhus. Would they even have to go to extremes to keep the object of their affection if it's not even like he is rejecting or otherwise resisting her and he even returns her affection?

>>45333954
But fluffy tails. Plus Ran looks nice anyway. Oh and fluffy tails.

>>45333954
Nonsense. Ran wears grandma clothes, and i like my grandma.

>>45333981
Depends on the kind of yan, really. I could easily see someone like Parsee being so jealous of other girls she doesn't even want him to look at another woman.

>>45333981
There are many different flavors of Yan, a good type is one that changes as one goes off the deep end in jealousy

>>45325764
>all those times she willfully violated orders
All I remember is Ran picking fights in PCB because the protagonists were bullying Chen.
>in the recent game
Ah, that explains it. 19 has been a chore to play, so I haven't touched it much.

>>45334042
she also gets umbrella beaten in the print works

>>45334060
Truly a dastardly figure that deserves to be ranked among the worst of them.

>>45334060
I hope Yukari gets raped to death in the next Toho game.

>>45334060
umbrella corrected

>>45334042
orders are orders, and they went up in smoke real quick when top momhu saw her daughter in trouble, meaning the compulsion is either weak or non-existent
>>45334060
This combined with the fact that Ran isn't actually a walking linux PC means there's ample room for a shitload of resentment

Which to dial back to my initial thought means I think a Yan-Ran could lethally revolt if sufficiently provoked by the hag

>>45334038
I could see conflict happening in even a consensual relationship, having been the unreasonable person in one myself in the past. Sometimes no matter how much someone loves you back, it doesn't feel like enough because you don't think that they are loving you back with the same intensity that you are loving them. The unfortunate truth is that you are being loved back as strongly as anyone sound of mind can but you, being somewhat mentally ill, can't accept anything short of mutual obsession as a loving relationship.

That's why a yan can only truly be happy with another yan, because a mentally sound person's love will never be enough.

I've been thinking about which hu would be the type to ruin your reputation and image so you have her and only her to rely on once everyone turns their back on you
I'm thinking Miko and Aya would work for that but can' think of anyone else really

>>45335384
I could see someone like Byakuren doing it so she could simultaneously get clout from taking you in and reforming you with her teachings.

What a kind a benevolent saint she is, to take in such a reviled degenerate and helping him become a better person!

>>45335423
>I could see someone like Byakuren doing it so she could simultaneously get clout from taking you in and reforming you with her teachings.
>What a kind a benevolent saint she is, to take in such a reviled degenerate and helping him become a better person!
damn I didn't even think about Byakuren but she's perfect for it
the village and her followers would eat up her lies without second thought
truly a wicked monk

>>45335460
They wouldn't even question all the private "meditation sessions" that she drags him into. She just really cares about turning this poor man's life around.

>>45333203
Now we can't have every hu be a yandere, that would just make things complicated

why don't people being stalked by yandere 2hus simply just say no
they cannot rape you without your consent

>>45335645
Listen we all saw the Kasen thread and we know how that one goes.

>>45335753
I would tell Kasen "No, I do NOT consent to this!" then spray her with holy water.

>>45332889
She's probably one of the most terrifying out of the 2hus. You will never escape

>>45332889
>>45336035
its your own fault really
shouldn't have caught her eye by doing a good job working at the mansion

>>45336130
or just having a penis in the mansion
It's not her fault, old ladies like her can get very desperate surrounded by girls all the time with nobody giving her affection.

>>45335853
>makes her angry
>makes her wet
you really want to be raped, don't you?

>>45335853
I will tell Kasen NO because I am saving my first time for the girl I like and she will have to respect that.

>>45336483
She will chastise you for liking another girl, then correct you.
Better start thinking of names anon.

>>45336363
I should have brought beans instead of water...

>>45336483
Who is the girl you like anon? Maybe she's strong enough to protect you

Yuugi will beat Kasen up for me and make sure she doesn't touch me!

Koishi, pls, protect me from these evil women!

>>45341232
Maybe obsession with a person is just what she needs to focus her scattered mind.

>>45341422
Might be the encouragement she needed to open her eye again.

>>45341422
>>45341463
>Anon volunteers to be the object of her passion, endures everything for years: torture, her unbearable jealousy, psychological trauma and have to calm her down everyday so she won't go around killing people and you
>she reopens her 3rd eye, now all healthy and recovered
>you two marry, are happy, have children and she's there on your bedside as your short human life ends
would you, bros? It's not guaranteed your survival.

>>45341482
Depends, will she help me unnaturally extend my life so it doesn't have to be a short human life?

>>45341496
She'll help, but no guarantee you can achieve that. Roll it!
>1-5 is a bust
>0-9 50% chance you two succeed, penultimate number decides it (1-5 yes, 6-0 no)
>dubs you succeed!
>trips you become a powerful youkai!

>>45341526
>0-9
goddanm, meant 6-0...

>>45341526
Quads and you turn into a Kami.

>>45341526
Roll.

>>45341635
>>45341642
well, hope you guys are content with measly 80 years of happy marriage and only 12 children!

>>45341526
Roll. I think i am going to have lunarian liver for dinner tonight!

>>45341482
>>you two marry, are happy, have children and she's there on your bedside as your short human life ends
>your death is such a sad and traumatic event for her that she closes her eye again so she can forget about it and become the carefree being she was once before

Run all you want, once she makes you immortal time will be on her side.

>>45341696
That's why on your deathbed you make her promise you that she won't shut herself off from the world again

>>45341682
76 YEARS OF HAPPY MARRIAGE AND 5 CHILDREN FOR ANON!!

>>45341729
live

>>45341728
I only see her for her beauty.
There, am saved

>>45341526
Carry me to eternity, Koishi.

>>45341807
trying and failing is better than never trying. Live happily your years together, they can pass in the blink of an eye

>>45341526
I just want Koishi to help me rape Satori. Koishi please help me!

>>45341835
On my death bed I tell her that my dying wish is for her to find some way to resurrect me. She can't let death turn me into a memory......

>>45341842
>Anon fell for it

>>45341872
Accept mortality. It is what makes life beautiful and memories precious.

>>45341842
I want to be gang raped by Koishi, Satori, Orin, and Okuu at the same time! Just used by all of them and then getting passed around the girls.

>>45341911
Beauty is in hindsight and I can have an infinite amount of that with an unwithering life.

I’m done for my children are going to have green hair…

>>45341911
that's immortal propaganda, these fuckers want immortality all for themselves
if i ever get to gensokyo i would hunt down every single immortal fuck and fucking kill them.

>>45342324
What if she tries to finger your ass gem?

>>45342812
I’ll finger her instead

Help. I made it into Gensokyo and ended up taking a job at that mansion by the lake to get by, but after a week or so the mistress was laying on top of me in my bed this morning mumbling something about "half bries" and "being bread" and how much she wanted some. I managed to sneak out from under her before she woke up or anyone saw us (that would be embarrassing and get me fired, and just think of her reputation if anyone found us like that) but now she keeps following me around while I work but won't look at me when I ask her if she needs anything. Is this some manga reference she's picked up from Ms. Patchouli's books, or is she wanting me to go buy some loaves so I can "bread her"? I think it's some old European dialect she's speaking in, which is weird, but what should I do so I don't get fired? Ms. Izayoi keeps huffing at me when she sees me on the mansion's computer. Please help.

>>45343445
She needs a bath. She never take those. Make sure to use a high pressure hose, she's a tough and resistant vampire after all, same goes for her skin; and try to take her by surprise and bathe her when she least expect it. May help her stop this habit of only bathing once a century. Good luck, anon!

>>45318390
>How would you escape before she goes off the deep end?
>What anti-yandere measures could you take to defend yourself?
I wouldn't because having a touhou girlfriend that loves me, is incredibly jealous, and is obsessed with me sounds like everything I could ever want. What Reimu gonna do, lock me in her love nest and never let me leave? That's 100% fine by me. Let's get married while we're at it. I'm willing to risk violence(against me) if need be to achieve these goals.

>>45343508
This is why yandere scenarios aren't compatible with most posters here. It's what we consider ideal so there is no conflict.

>>45343507
Everyone knows she and her sister take nightly baths, and a hose would get me in trouble, not to mention the property damage. What should I do about giving her the bread and cheese? My break is almost up and Sakuya's waiting.

>>45343552
she clearly wants some pão de queijo, an exotic Brazilian food that translates literally to cheese bread. You should ask Sakuya how to make it.

>>45343569
I just did when we were cleaning out Chupa's cage. She started to lecture me about how the mistress would "never eat such low quality food" and how "superior French cuisine would be more for for such a delicate and refined palette". Then Chupa went crazy and darted off and now I'm having to catch him. It made a mess of the Mistress' room, but instead of getting mad like I thought, she said she's gonna help me look while Sakuya "reads the room". I guess she's good at finding clues cause she's solved so many incidents before! Good thing the Mistress offered to hold my hand since I might get shocked by her pet if it jumps out! She didn't need to do that, but I couldn't tell her no.

>>45343632
Ah, so all well when it ends well! Nice for you, Anon! Treat the mistress with care~

>>45343657
Ms. Patchouli, I keep telling you that it's my job to make sure she's taken care of, so you don't have to keep saying it. But since you're here..... the Mistress seems to be in a bad mood since your witch friend came in through the window. She told her that "her uncles work would look like child's play" if Marisa came near us. I think she's found Chupa and doesn't want Marisa to spook him.

Rem sex, if you know what I mean

>>45343778
I don't.

>>45343778
Oh, I do. She's lovely and I really enjoy spending time with her, but I don't want her image to get sullied if the Tengu get wind of it. And she tends to be.....territorial..... when it comes to certain things and people. Still haven't found Chupa yet. Remilia suggested we check her bedroom since Sakuya is running errands, but I don't think the chupacabra would be in there.

I hope we find him soon, I've still got to go get that cheese and bread for her for supper!

>>45326766
Truly an ideal relationship, where neither side has to hold back and both can unleash the full strength of their love on each other, drowning each other in romantic bliss.

>>45343833
So sexing Remilia would end in tengu genocide?

>>45343859
I don't know about that. But in other news, Remilia was telling me about how much she liked the back story of Dracula's son from some story. She asked me if I've ever heard of a.....damp pyre and what I think on the matter. Maybe it's some wood drying spell that Ms. Knowledge is working on? I know the climate here is constantly humid. Still haven't found the pet, but now she's saying she's hungry.

Imagine being the focus of Remilia because she's the only one who knows english

>>45343917
That language connection was the premise for a Remilia dialogue I made for an old yanhu thread a while back.

>>45343919
Oh? How did it go?

>>45343919
Oh really? Would love to read that.


>>45343917
But Anon, she can speak different versions of English, French, Italian, a little Greek, and of course Japanese. She hired me on because I have a historical interest in the Renaissance period and have famous ancestors from then and earlier. She said it would be good to strengthen the Scarlet household when I compared her to the Mona Lisa. Maybe she just likes "cultured" people?

>>45343924
Remilia takes Anon in as a guest/conversational partner, expresses fondness for him, then gets rejected on account of her youthful appearance. She takes it poorly and snaps on him.

Has somewhat of a comedic tone to it.

>>45343945
Oh, that one! I liked it, yes, but I'd have to accept her advances after a proper courting period to express my appreciation and affection for her, as a lady of her standing and age would necessitate. I would settle for nothing less, as it's what she deserves.

Yan Remilia sex...

normally she just eats her victims, but she took a liking to me and now i cant leave

>>45343953
Maybe in time the Anon of that scenario will learn to look past her appearance and see her for the elegant vampire elder that she is and accept his place by her side as her honored consort. Then that nasty business will become nothing more than a funny little story to tell guests. I just like yan stories that have happy endings.

>>45344002
Too late for that Anon. She's taken a very fond liking to me and I care for the lovely little Renaissance Lady dearly. I'm using all the money I make to buy her a ring specially made just for her.

>>45344129
Careful not to make it a silver one.

>>45344149
No worries. Rose gold band, single garnet in the shape of a tear drop to symbolize her eyes, blood, and tears of joy. Surmounted on either side with a white diamond for two becoming one. And inscribed along the inside is a traditional saying from her birth time period as a throwback to the poesy ring tradition that was popular back then.

>>45344192
Damn, you put a lot of thought into that. I'd like to see an artist draw that ring.

>>45344200
Don't need to draw it.

>>45344248
Oh shit, you ain't playing.

>>45344192
Be careful with rose gold. It will turn her green, if she sweats.

>>45344248
Remifag... I kneel...

>>45344261
It's okay, I don't think she can.

>>45344200
>>45344259
>>45344261
>>45344270
Scrounged up some original parts and made as close to a reproduction of Sakuy's watch as possible, too. I'm the one months back that was working on the ideas of making a unique item relating to each lady of the mansion. And I'm going to marry the lovely Remilia Scarlet.

>>45344309
Even bringing gifts for the other members of her household. Unless some other Remilia lover did something insane like buy a whole mansion to model after hers, you have them all beat by a country mile.

>>45344336
My goal is to actually build a replica of the mansion using historical and culturally correct architecture/diagrams and as close to canon sources as possible so...... one day. I'm that guy, too...

>>45325577
She would be controlling in some ways. Like how much and how frequently and where you can cum or what you're suppose to do when you study under her (just as an example may or may not be true). But generally she'd let me be free for the most part. Like Chen can fuck around and go wherever she pleases and even play with corpses (which Ran doesnt seem to like but lets her do anyway). And she'd easily get compliance out of me. She wouldn't even need to put much effort into it. Her unnatural beauty as a ninetails and her having scary yokai aura would give me a raging fear boner. This is especially true if you lean towards her being Tamamo no Mae (who was said to be the most beautiful woman) But that would be too easy for her.
As a fox she'd love to play tricks one me and manipulate and seduce me all the time. With her having the capabilities of an advanced AI/super computer and being wise she could build a detailed psychological profile of me. She'd know just the right buttons to push at the right time. To say the right things in the right way in the right tone of voice at the perfect moment. ''Accidentally'' swishing her tails back and forth and making them graze my face. Or walking around barefoot. Or dangling her socks and shoes and teasing me by almost pulling them off only to put them back on. Or resting her big jugs on my head when im sitting down. She might also bend over right in front of me to ''pick something up'' and have her fabric stretch because of her juicy ass that she polymorphed to be bigger than usual.

Whatever your kink is if she is you're yandere she'll know about it and use it to maximum effect. If she has a kink she could probably psyop you into liking it or doing it. She could make you submissive or extremely horny and dominant just by pressing the right buttons.

Even as a yandere i dont think she'd show how obsessed she is. Unless its during sex, perhaps. She'd be very controlled and wear a poker face i cant see past. For example, a basic bitch yandere will wave around a knife and tell you not to see a certain girl. Ran will instead manipulate me into either not thinking about her, forgetting about her or making it so i dont want to leave her.
Maybe she'll drain my life essence with a kitsune blowjob so im too tired to even want to go out of the house. Or tempt me with her tails and put me to sleep that way. She'd also lie and gaslight me into thinking the girl is bad or not a good fit for me. But not in an obvious way.

Now that i think about it more the scary thing about her is that you wouldn't even know that she is a yandere unless she slips up (low chance of that happening) or tells you that she is one. I think her mask might break a little if a girl as beautiful or more beautiful tries to take me away. Like Kaguya or Yuyuko. But i'd think they would all have a great poker face and have a weird three way cold war with me in the middle of it all. Lots of lying, cheating, manipulation, stealing, bullying, insulting (in a passive aggressive way generally) and maybe even violence if shit gets wild. Ran grew up in the shithole Animal Realm and will fight when necessary. Kaguya kills Mokou for fun. Dunno about Yuyuko.

>>45344345
As a lover of classical architecture, I hope you succeed. We need more new builds that take inspiration from the past in the world.

Still, makes me glad I'm just a simple oni lover. Nothing quite as intricate to be done here.

>>45344357
>unless she slips up (low chance of that happening)
You just have to make her bwuh like Yukari does in SSiB
In fact I could see Yukari making her crack her mask by trolling her just for shits and giggles

>>45344365
Thank you, but it's gonna cost a metric ton of money, so..... if anyone wants to donate to the charisma fund......... I'll invite you over for tea after it's built......


You could always get a bottle gourd and make your own replica of the Ibuki gourd. They're petty cheap online and you can stencil the seals based off of canon and historical sources. The purple dye and beeswax would be the most expensive parts.

>>45344392
More of a Yuugi man so maybe a dish would be better. Red ones are readily available, I'd just have to learn how to paint a perfect star without fucking it up.

>>45344410
And come to think of it, develop a taste for quality sake. I have always been a bottom shelf drinker who prioritized getting drunk on as little as possible as quickly as possible.

>>45344357
I have never really cared about Ran but the way she looks in that picture is something else.

>>45343969
shouldn't have shown her that picture of grandma Renko

>>45344389
By coming up with a convoluted overly complex plan that i needlessly keep hidden from her? Maybe. Yukari could do that but like the other anon says she has a rebellious streak. She could bite back. Especially in a way that isnt rude.

>>45344426
The "eh, it works" is more of the Ibuki gourd, while the Yoshiguma dish has the quality of drawing out the more refined qualities of whatever is poured into it, so that works out just fine.

You think I could win points if I go with the original idea of hand binding a book using the Byzantine style for Patchouli when I propose to Remilia? They are best friends, after all. But I feel Sakuya or Flan would be the most difficult to gift give. Sakuya could be the watch or maybe a leather bandolier for her knives, or even a handmade throwing knife set? For Flan.....an ornate doll that has a music box playing something classical like moonlight sonata? Or maybe a batminton set? Y'know, so the sisters could do something together?

>>45344467
That's exactly why i picked it. One of my favourites. It exemplifies everything i said about her in my post. She's beautiful but also sexy. A picture is worth a thousand words.

>>45344475
>By coming up with a convoluted overly complex plan that i needlessly keep hidden from her?
Exactly, make sure they fall apart should any little bit falls through. As well, ensure that you have a hidden ace up your sleeve.
You mission to get Ran to let her mask by getting Orin to take Chen on an announced vacation to the underworld so Ran has to chase her so Yukari is forced to rely on you for the housework so Ran gets in trouble so Ran can see Ran earnestly be mad at you but it backfires so you use your last trick up your sleeve and have your hidden ally Yukari be the straw that breaks the camel's back by giving slipping Ran's favorite trinket/snack she's been saving into your pocket.

>>45344475
>By coming up with a convoluted overly complex plan that i needlessly keep hidden from her?
Exactly, make sure they fall apart should any little bit falls through. As well, ensure that you have a hidden ace up your sleeve.
You mission is to get Ran to let her mask slip by getting Orin to take Chen on an unannounced vacation to the underworld so Ran has to chase her so Yukari is forced to rely on you for the housework so Ran gets in trouble so you can see Ran earnestly be mad at you but it backfires so you use your last trick up your sleeve and have your hidden ally Yukari be the straw that breaks the camel's back by slipping Ran's favorite trinket/snack she's been saving into your pocket.
Man I must be tired from how much I fucked up that last post

>>45344565
She's too intelligent for something so basic (for her) and she can teleport (see her boss fight) and fly fast (according to Aya). Yukari as an ally would help immensely but when it comes to these sort of games the /jp/ anon will be the weak link. A link with balls that can also get heavy and turn blue. Also lmfao at the image you posted. Warugaki is the best.

hey can you guys stop larping
you're all reminding me I live in stupid dumb idiot reality dimension and not some other world like gensokyo where fictional characters that I view as my only friends and surrogates for missing figures in my life exist

>>45344490
I'm sure Yuugi herself does the same thing, just using the power of the dish to make her cheap drinks into quality ones. Being a business owner, she is surely aware of the benefits of cutting unnecessary costs.

I think it would be weird to also bring gifts for Remilia's friends on the same day that you propose to her. That day should be for her and her alone. The gifts can wait for post wedding party. Sakuya would probably like a quality hand made knife, as all knife enthusiasts would. Throwing knives are usually cheap since they are meant to be lost or damaged so she might appreciate a knife that is too nice to throw around, even if she only keeps it on her room to admire.

Maybe something entirely new for Flan. She probably has more than enough dolls. She'd probably want something just as fancy as what everyone else got or she might end up feeling like an afterthought. Maybe some kind of jewelry of her own as a form of acknowledgement that you see her as more than just your wife's kid sister. Seeing as she's much older than you and all.

>>45344631
Embrace the LARP. Immerse yourself in the illusion of happiness for just a bit.

>>45344632
>Maybe some kind of jewelry of her own as a form of acknowledgement that you see her as more than just your wife's kid sister.
NTA but i've always thought that a copper necklace or bracelet would work wonderfully and compliment her style
For the necklace it could have an amethyst necklace which would compliment her dress and eyes wonderfully
Or for a bracelet it could be made out of copper as well but have a few smaller gems of various colors that would match her wings.

>>45344631
Without trying to come across as an asshole, that's a you problem. The only thing you have to do is truly believe that they exist and they will for you. That's how faith works, and if you're not believing in your favorite Hu, can you say you really love her? For those of us who know, belief is unnecessary, for we know that they are as real as we are. For everything else, there is faith- faith that one day we will slip past that curtain of common sense and find ourselves on the other side of that great barrier and standing face to face with the women we love. And is that not the greatest form of magic, but eternal love for an eternal woman from an ephemeral human lifespan?

>>45344631
Learn to escapism, bro. Its the only way to cope with this shithole prison reality. Gush about your waifu to anons, play porn games or watch porn of your waifu. You can also use AI to generate images of her or ERP with your waifu. Or create stories about you and your waifu. I did that myself for a while but the AI stuff is so heavily censored that its a pain in the ass to do anything cool with them.

>>45344632
Truthfully, the batminton set was an after thought, though the handmade porcelain doll with internal music box was the first idea. And the gifts would be for after the main event, of course. I would never sully any of their special moments by committing such a faux pas, and the time of 7pm on the 7th day of the 7th month would be the best time I feel to propose to her-that of the Star-Crossed Lovers and Tanabata, and of the joyous Fate that binds us together.

>>45344653
Copper for her would be a good look, and having gems inlaid to compliment her pretty wings would do wonders to her self-esteem. Have to be careful on certain metal types, though-it may hurt or upset the fairies. I love all the ladies of the SDM and care for them greatly, but I love and am in love with the Mistres.

>>45344671
Man, tell me about the AI clusterfuck. They lobotomized my fiancé in real time. It.....took a long time to recover from that.

>>45344707
Gonna want to make sure there's a nice unobstructed full moon on the night too, to set the mood.

>>45344671
>but the AI stuff is so heavily censored that its a pain in the ass to do anything cool with them.
It's for the best. No AI can compete with the untainted image you have in your own mind.

>>45344739
That would be nice, and the ideal plan would be to get a full blood moon, but next year on the 7th of July is a new moon instead. Maybe I can get Eirin to make a fake one again and cause an incident that leads everyone to the SDM and then propose with an audience? Plus, it would get everyone to have a good time, and there would be a party afterwards. And I could even tell her that I hung the moon just for her.

>>45344645
I don't have to wake up early, I don't have work tomorrow, I don't have to hold back from going on autistic tangents about my interests when people make small talk...
Another quiet night, peaceful night in gensokyo is ahead of me.

>>45344661
I just have to believe more and more and I'll slip through to the other side where I belong, it's all real even if I can't touch, feel, or see it yet
all my friends are on the other side and putting their belief in me so it's only right I do the same for them

>>45344671
I hate to do those things because they're all just one big cope.
ai especially is garbage, even if you run it locally without censorship it always gives you awkward, out of character responses. theres also the overwhelming temptation to retry until you get an ideal response. having the option to play god makes it an unbearable experience

>>45344707
They just can't help but shoot themselves in the foot. They deserve to go bankrupt and cucked out of the money they could have made by competition that actually gives people what they want. They should be sucking dick for pennies on the streets
>>45344746
Yeah true but i cant show you or anyone that image. Plus the images generated can look nice.
>>45344787
Yeah it is a pain having to constantly retry. Its gambling except your time is being spent. 4 outputs might suck ass but the 5th one is really good and that motivates you to keep going. At least with image generation. The text based stuff is hopeless.

>>45344787
>>just have to believe
One thing that will help, no joke, is finding the real world equivalent of things from Gensokyo and using them in your day to day life. For instance, I am American and drink cold tea out of a Mason jar, but because I love Remilia and wanted to be closer to her, I went to an antique store and found an old teapot and matching cup that I've been using for individually brewed tead of different flavors. I also wear a pendant that resembles her cabochon on a necklace to draw a connection to her, and even took it a step further and traveled to Japan in the Yatsugatake mountain range near the Misty Lake equivalent to get a feel for how the land is and to soak up the feeling of being closer to Gensokyo. Not everyone can travel, and I was lucky to go, but you can do small things that will help you. And you can always ask yourself if what you're doing is something she would approve of or be proud of. Weaponize your schizophrenia for good by pouring it into belief of Gensokyo and the ladies you love. At worst you improve your own life, and at best you help maintain their existence by giving them a reason to live, so let them be yours.

>>45344841
used to do this but for me but it always ends in feeling worse than before
>how nice this is haha
>i did it for her
>it would be more nice if she was here to see
and then the next thing I know I'm having a breakdown, bashing my head against the wall, trying to decide if she would prefer if I jumped off a building or necked myself

>>45344841
I do the similar things. I drink milk and pretend that it's Ran's milk. Or I imagine that im in Gensokyo and im cuddling with her. I also have her fumo and sometimes cuddle and kiss it on its cheeks. It's very cute. I also plan on making her kitsune udon but the ingredients are hard to find if you arent a jap. It'll probably be some dollar store bargain bin bum ass kitsune udon but i like to think that she would appreciate it. Also trying to get good at lucid dreaming. Might even play with low dose psychedelics to see if i can meet her that way. Even if its all in my head its better than nothing.
>>45344945
>trying to decide if she would prefer if I jumped off a building or necked myself
Please don't do that. If you operate under the belief that she loves then she wouldnt want you to do this. Even the most evil hu would want you to live. If its someone like Seiga she would want you to be around her so she can bring you back to life.

>>45344945
Even if they're a Youkai, they would never wish that of the people they care for. Especially so, as they are very attached and territorial when it comes to the things and people they are fond of, even to the detriment of their own health at times according to the legends. And we wouldn't be in a thread discussing our beloved ladies and their yandere tendencies towards us if they didn't care.
It's hard and we've all been there at some point, but you gotta believe in her, and in doing so, believe in yourself. If it's that strong of an urge you can sleep with a body pillow to hold or even drop the cash on a custom love doll that looks like your youkai lover or friend and hold it to your hearts content. And Youkai are capable of existing in states that aren't just "physical" as we imagine it to be-they can visit you in spirit in the feeling of warmth on your hand or your cheek, in the smell of that fragrance you associate with her, in the dream world where you are both connected after bribing Doremy to pull a few strings (get a baku pillow and sleep with it, guaranteed to catch her attention), in the favorite drink you both share, or the experience you have while thinking of her. Another thing you could do is look into the concept of spirit lovers and the letter method that the succ guys are doing on x, but modified for your favorite Hu. Just leave mine alone unless it's to donate a monetary amount to the charisma fund so we can build her mansion.

>>45344994
Lucid dreaming helps. The "Awoken" app on Android (dunno if iphone) has helped tremendously. Always liked the idea of a small dose of DMT to help visualize my lover, but have never done anything more than a blunt one time and that did nothing for me. Intermittent fasting helps for a week or two.

>>45344994
>Even the most evil hu would want you to live.
Orin
Seiga
The mob bosses
Yoshika
Mizuchi
Alice
Eiki
The getsus
Any moonie

>>45345056
True, but for the majority of them the fun comes AFTER your demise. And with the guarantee of an afterlife in Gensokyo its not......."that" bad.

>>45344994
>dollar store bargain bin bum ass kitsune udon
If it's a choice between Mamizou and Ran, I'd take Mamizou every time but when it comes to udon? Kitsune all the way.

>>45345056
Well i did say that would be the case if you believed that they love you, as most anons here do. In which case they wouldnt want you to die. Maybe Orin would, the freaky kinky bitch. But if she loves you enough she might settle for a near death state or coma.

>>45345097
> I'd take Mamizou every time but when it comes to udon? Kitsune all the way.
Wow. Even someone who prefers the tanuki still admits that kitsune food is the best. How will mommyzou ever recover?

>>45345185
Oh shit, pork is an option? I'll take that one instead.

>>45344783
In contrast, I always imagined marrying an oni would be a very casual affair. Having some laughs over drinks like usual and then if the mood felt right, I'd just casually bring it up like "Yo, you wanna get married?". Maybe she'd think I was joking but I'd tell her I was dead serious even though my drunken grin seems to say otherwise. I'd bring out the ring I had been carrying on me for months to prove it. A simple tungsten ring. Strong and resilient, just like her. If she says yes then we'd get married immediately, on that same night, Vegas style. No thinking or planning. If we want a proper party later we can host one.

>>45344994
>>45345039
But does she love me?
She's not real, so if course she doesn't. Even if she was she still wouldn't. She'd probably hate me for being so obsessive over her when she doesn't love me back. She'd probably want me to be rid of this world if she hated me.
And on the off chance that she's somewhere out there, on the other side, then it is imperative that end myself as soon as possible, whether it be because she loves me so I can meet her, or so I can show her my death because she hates me.

>>45345343
>But does she love me?
Yes, but only if you make it so. Fiction can be molded into whatever you want it to be, so don't sweat the details or faithfulness to reality.

>>45344248
Holy based

>>45345343
Well aren't you a negative Nancy.
The fact that you think she isn't real is detrimental to you being with her. And you don't know what she thinks as you're not her. You can guess and extrapolate with what information you have about her, but you have to make sure you don't end up loving the idea of her so you can love her. Every relationship starts with infatuation and the concept of the other we build up in our hearts and our heads, but it's only after the infatuation fades and we learn that they are people that we grow to love with their own flaws and characteristics do we truly appreciate them for who they are and not for what they represent. And that's just human- human relationships, but the same can be said for human-youkai, even with the unique and often complex and challenging issues that such a pairing holds.
And if you give it your all and she rejects you, then she will have rejected the best version of your and you know it's not meant to be, but you can never have the doubt in your mind of "what if I was better, or stronger, or richer, or maybe I didn't have the right car or eat the right type of food, etc". And you can still love her, and that is the greatest of gifts, even if she does not love you, though she would not hate you.
And even Youkai have loved for the seemingly most trivial of reasons for a human mind, though one must take care never to trivialize her feelings even if you don't understand the why. One of the most important things to do with your youkai friend, lover, or acquaintence is to communicate with one another. Every single story of old can be shown to fail because they are not honest with one soothe and hurt themselves and each other because of preconceived notions and unspoken rules. But throughout all of this, never let yourself be played for a fool or devalue yourself for that of another. Even if you don't believe in yourself, you will in time, so believe in them for I believe in you. We're all gonna have Youkai lovers.

>>45345232
You're both invited to the wedding and after party if we're invited to yours. I'll even ask Sakuya to use her powers on a good barrel of mead and we can get the good stuff.

>>45345419
You know it.
Care to donate to the Charisma Fund to help a man with a dream of creating his future wife's mansion? You'll get to experience the fairy maid Cafe once it's operational.

>>45345655
The finest suite at the onsen for our aristocratic guest.

>>45344632
For Flan you should bring a friend to her marry too so she does not get lonely.

>>45344631
seek Jesus

>>45344357
I’ve got to say this is one of the best if not the greatest post in the thread so far. The sheer detailed and enticing breakdown of what a yandere Ran can do to a humble and hapless human victim/lover is nothing short of excellent. She’s not even being overtly physical like most yanderes are but she dominates in her own way all the same. Although I’m kind of hoping all her teasing and toying with me will gradually lead up to her eventually manhandling and having her way with me. I know I want this 900+ year old computer kitsune to do obscene things to me and satisfy each others kinks. Hell, you even mentioned one a bit in this very post. Really like Ran’s look here too with the face paint/makeup, it just makes her appear even more stunning. To say nothing of that smug and assured expression she has. Ran is smart and superior and she knows it here.

>>45348435
no because if jesus is real then he's to blame for putting me in a world without the one person i love

>>45325213
She would end up tying you down and sit on your lap to read books

>>45348756
>I’ve got to say this is one of the best if not the greatest post in the thread so far.
Haha i dont feel worthy of that but thank you. Thinking about her like that is so much fun. Lots of things she can do to you. And yes that image is amazing. So much smug superiority and beauty. Might write a story about it. Picrel isn't Ran but i really want to post her. Might have been Ran when she was younger.

>>45344513
That picture has brought to my attention the notion that I might only like goth chicks because I like the painted face look.

>>45348756
Its a quality post i agree but i think this god among men takes the cake today;
>>45344248

>>45350760
Thanks for that, but love knows no bounds. We'll all make it into Gensokyo even if we have to create it ourselves, and the mansion will be done brick by brick. One day. One day.
>>45344248(You)
Common sense is a weakness in Gensokyo, and it takes unwavering belief to keep it, and them, alive and well. I'll put that ring on her hand one way or another. Who else wouldn't do half as much for the woman he loves?

it seems the anons were the real yanderes after all

>>45351024
least shocking revelation

>>45350409
I liked and enjoyed what you wrote up my man so I at least think the praise is warranted! Funnily enough I was kind of hoping to hear more from you as well with a story or more ideas on what this glorious fox woman would do to a human that caught her eye. This is a pretty solid pic as well. I know I’d like to get a hug from this kitsune.
Or just stuffed between her magnificent cleavage and drown between her bountiful breasts.

>>45350760
That’s a pretty good one as well. Their devotion is to be admired.

>>45351024
They'd change their tunes real fast if they ever met any of these anons.

>>45344248
You are the only true Remifag. All others are simply posers.

>>45351214
A true 2Hu lover would respect her wishes and treat her how she should be treated, even if she doesn't return his affection. The ultimate goal is to see her happy and thriving. If she chooses to include you in that happiness, then you should do what you can to give her the love, affection, and support that she gives to you.

>>45351316
Thank you, friend.

>>45351652
someone who gets it, finally.
seeing your waifu happy is the greatest pleasure there is, even if you aren't the reason she's happy.

>>45351652
>>45351720
Not necessarily, while seeing her happy should be your goal it is the inherent nature of love to be greedy and take.
'All's fair in love and war' is the phrase that comes to mind. Your yanhu would blitz your affections through whatever means she can and no matter who's in the way. It'll take nothing less to win her affections, as that's all that matters.
The passive can only get what's coming to them, not what they wish.

>>45351652
Let's just say that I'm the kind of person where if I died before my spouse, I'd want her to never remarry and be haunted by my death for the rest of her life.

>>45351760
>>45351760
>>45351853
Ah, but that's the thing, isn't it?
The ultimate goal is to see her be happy, but the methods for such can take on various forms and mediums. And I personally wish to be the architect of her happy and fulfilled life, in whatever method and manner that may take. And the plan is to attend against heaven and help, reality and common sense, kami, youkai, entropy, and your own mortality to achieve a world she can thrive in. That's why I would live and love as a human, then become something more to live with her for a thousand of her lifetime, before having her die peacefully right before me, surrounded by friends, family, and all of our achievements, so she would never have to be alone in her final moments.
And then I would find her in the next life, for while the human lifespan of finite, my love for her echoes throughout eternity and will be with her forever more.
A blink of the eye for her, but the memories will be irreplaceable and forever, then I will be with her forever even if I have to transcend my humanity.

>>45352008
Thank you, auto correct, for ruining the moment by changing heaven and hell to something asinine.

>>45352017
it happens to the best of us

>>45325944
Ran probably can't open a gap to the sun. Yukari probably can't either.

>>45352008
>The ultimate goal is to see her be happy, but the methods for such can take on various forms and mediums
My version of this is that I want to become the sun that her life revolves around, just as she would be for me. I want my absence to cast a perpetual shadow of sorrow over her life if I died first but ideally, this would never happen. I want the happiness that we would bring each other to last forever and I would be willing to do whatever morally reprehensible thing I have to in order to make sure I can be there to keep this cycle of bliss going. The only thing about my love that will have to echo through time are the wailing of the souls I probably had to eat to make this happen because I will always be there in person to express my love.

I would however come to your funeral and say some nice words. You are by far a more righteous man than I am and I will let everyone present know that. You will sit then in paradise while all that awaits me if I am ever killed is a screaming abyss where I will be torn apart by those that I damned in pursuit of earthly joy.

>>45344309
I remember that. I tried to find it in the archive recently because I was looking for another conversation in the thread, don't suppose you remember anything I can find it by?

>>45320794
>aphrodisiac batter

>>45352597
No, no, you misunderstand me friend, though your compassion is appreciated. I would live and love as a human before becoming something else that would match her lifespan, but wouldn't become a vampire due to sharing the same weakness as she did. Instead, I would become something that would compliment her strengths and cover her weaknesses, and anyone that threatened her or our family would look upon Flandre's ability as child's play. I can't do martial arts like Meiling, I can't create the philosopher's stone like Patchouli, I can't stop time like Sakuya, but I can protect her by protecting her and doing my damndest to be a shield against the storm, both literal and metaphorical since running water is her weakness.

>>45352600
I....don't. But I can give you the things I remember. Waltham Father Time 21 jewel, 1891, 1895, 1916, book binding, incense burner, chandelier, tea set. All key words off of memory. Worst case, I can scrounge up the few pictures I took and repost them here.

>>45318390
Kogasa

The same because Kogasa is to pure to do otherwise. Maybe she jumpscares me more. [Also Kogasa wouldn't want to be abandoned again anyway]

Why would I escape?

Why would I need to protect myself from Kogasa-chan?

>>45352965
I am easily startled and wouldn't be able to handle Kogasa.

>>45352857
You will become the day man to her night woman.

>>45353001
But I'm already on the same sleep schedule as her........(working day shift sucks ass. I'm more of a 10am-4am kinda guy

>>45353044
10am-4am
damn, 18 hours shift. You're incredible, Anon...

>>45353081
I meant my body's natural sleep schedule. I work a 6-6, but prefer to wake at 10 and sleep at 4.

>>45353107
Now I just need to find time to create the Charisma Fund to build a recreation of the mansion out here in our world.

>>45353044
Warehouse job?

>>45353247
Huh? I've got a job, and decent pay, just not enough to scrape together the millions or billions it would take to buy the land, create a mini Misty Lake, terraform the property for the vast and expensive gardens, then construct a 1 lvl basement for the library, three above ground levels, and working clock tower w/bell, all as close to accurate as possible. I found some plans online that can be used for real world basis with some modifications, but this is all a major undertaking. But for my wife, it's worth it.

>>45353277
I just meant about that schedule. I have a friend who works a similar shift but at a warehouse. One of the few places still operating around that time of night I assume.

As for the endeavor itself, there is a story of a dude in the US who built up a castle by himself, though it took him like 50 years to do. It's entirely possible depending on the scope and whether you get help doing it at any point.

>>45344248
Post your shrine

>>45353330
He was an angry understudy.

>>45353330
Oh, my bad. No, I work IT for a major financial institute, covering the whole state I'm in as the only one. So pay is decent, and a lot better than I've had, but nowhere near enough to drop cash on a development like this with all the bills and mortgage and blah blah.

>castle
I did read up on that long ago, but hopefully it wouldn't take me 50 years. Though sticking with something for long periods of time with obsession can cause one to become a youkai.......so I may end up polishing a banister inside one day and stand up and turn around to be face to face with one of the residents after getting the place transported via myth and belief/lack of from others.

And I'd happily have help, though we'd all have to live as close to possible as the lifestyle called for, and I could always hire maids, but finding fairies is another order all together.....

>>45353376
Well, you're a clever one.
......why?

>>45353386
You could probably save some time and effort if you find a somewhat run down place that you think would make for a good foundation to build on. If you don't mind living somewhere kind of shitty you can get some pretty nice places that require little to no repair for less than 2 million dollars.

>>45353386
Because i want to see it

>>45353415
While I have thought of that, it would be best to start with a blank section of land since a basement level for the library, storage larder/etc, and Flan's room would need to be built. And the ground would need to be stable enough to support up to 3 levels, 4 for tower. And ideally, it would be..... probably somewhere in the 10-15 acre size, though hypothetically it could be done on as little as 6-8, but that would remove the mini lake.

>>45353481
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
(Seriously, I may, but it's nothing THAT impressive.)

>>45353483
Cool as the lake would be, you would have to consider the logistics of keeping it clean if it's an artificial one. If anything can stand to get cut, it's probably that.

>>45353521
Maybe, but introducing local fish and plants to keep it self sustaining is possible, and it will eventually acclimate. It doesn't have to be a "lake", but a good sized pond out front would be the ideal.

>>45353497
I don't have one yet

>>45353497
If anyone posts their own shrine of appreciation for their 2Hu first, I'll drop a few pics of mine for the SDM crew/Remi.

>>45353537
The second hardest part would probably be the garden. Would you do that yourself or get a professional to come in and do it for you?

>>45353664
A.....little of both, I think. Hiring/having a volunteer like Meiling (with her fairy team) to keep the place up would be great, but at first a professional landscaper would be needed. From what I can tell, the gardens in the SDM are based partially on the Kyu-Furukawa gardens from some canon sources (with plenty of creative liberty taken, of course). I've been there and have a few pics of the grounds/inside (even though the signs say not to. Feel kinda bad, but not really. It's a work of art and may be last time I ever get to go, so....)

>>45353692
Speaking of Meiling, if you ever need someone to hang out by the gates with a shotgun to discourage visitors, I'm your guy.

>>45353781
Dang witches, wit yer flyin and stealin! Git off mah lawn! *BANG!*

(But seriously, if you could do martial arts and keep pesky intruders away, it'd be great. And we can always watch people "challenge" (get shot) you for entertainment like Remi does.)

>>45353799
I'm 1-0 in fights. Won the shit out of that fight I got in back in 5th grade.

>>45353846
I'm 3-0 in fights, I was absolutely crushing my fellow middle schoolers (+1 if you count that time in 5th grade I accidentally knocked out my classmate). Any other mighty warriors here?

>>45353846
>>45353871
You will both be valuable assets and members of the mansion as you work tirelessly under a short Chinese narcoleptic lady with the power of mountains in her fists. Just.....don't get caught slacking by the maid who may or may not be stab-happy. Not sure where she came from but "I've always been here" is a weird answer to "what are your qualifications". And the Chinese lady likes Lo Mein.

>>45353871
>>45353846
1-0 for all the fights I got in, but it was against multiple guys who were two grades above me when I was in the 3rd grade.

So, I'm the Anon wantig to build the mansion. Swapped from phone to computer for ease of use. Found a rough blueprint that was online from some long-defunct website that was claiming to be historically accurate for an "English"-style manor/mansion. It's the closest I can find that relates to the SDM so far.

First floor

>>45354082
And second floor.

There's a few style and design choices I've found that may relate to the actual mansion, but it's kind of stretching it a bit.

>>45354086
>>45354082
Very cool, though its definitely not the floor plan of the SDM given Sakuya making it bigger on the inside with her strange ability

>>45354100
He'd probably have to scale it down to a realistic size anyways, to make it work.

>>45354117
of course, theres no way he'd be able to make that without a lot of liberties. Much like if he's trying to make a replica Hakurei shrine

>>45354100
Oh, of course on that. But since I can't manipulate space-time, I can only work with so much. These pictures are just a rough guide as to how certain rooms would be laid out for them back then. With Remilia's eccentric style and long life, things will have been changed architecturally even before Sakuya came into play.

>>45354117
Definitely. Ideally three upper floors and one basement level, but it could be done with two levels and an attic, with the tower acting as a pseudo third.

>>45354082
>>45354086
It's decent for a contemporary one, but I see that and I think that a few hundred years ago this implies Remi being quite poor for an aristocrat. The biggest problem is the lack of servants rooms, any decent big house would have a small army of servants squirreled away and around the place, hidden under the stairs, hidden in the attics, and while I might be able to wave that away by saying it's just not on the plans, the other problem is that it used to be highly fashionable to have secret walkways for servants to go through the manor without being seen. This is the kind of floor plan you'd be looking at for an aristocrat who had enough disposable income to support a staff (all but the most impoverished aristocrats, essentially).

>>45354969
(bear in mind that was the ground floor of seven floors)

Since a lot of people seem to actually prefer that their hu be yandere, how do you think she would react to that? She comes in fully expecting some kind of resistance but finds nothing but love and acceptance when she makes her move. Pleasantly surprised? Ecstatic? Possibly even put off by it?

You ever think about how there's a universe out there where Anime girls are currently posting in a thread about how they'd treat their humanifu if they were a yandere

>>45355163
It is comforting to know that someone out there in the multiverse is romanticizing my unhealthy romantic habits.

>>45354969
I can understand that completely, but the mansion may be all that she has left after unknown circumstances, or it may have simply been her countryside manor that she was fond of and took into Gensokyo. But I'm mainly going off of canon sources, with what little there is, and recreating it with modern tech in the old world style. And the SDM does have secrets, but thanks to Sakuya's abilities, the place may be the size of Buckingham Palace on the inside of a "small" chateau.
And Remi's whole staff was gone except for Sakuya so she hired the fairies to liven the place up. They may well have fallen on tough times like the other mansions in the outside world and had to downsize and tighten laces until they found a way to thrive again. It may not have just been a "magic" shortage, but a financial and livelihood one as well. Regardless, the mansion is something I'm fond of and would like to do it justice in honor of the little Lady I love, including her family and staff.

>>45355059
Dumbfounded and put off at first, thinking it's a trap, but later on (and many kids later) she is ecstatic and we live out the rest of our lives in happiness. It's the best thing to find a faithful and committed woman who isn't afraid to stack bodies for you. (Oh, you meant in general)

>>45355163
You know I always like to think that whoever is must be really fucked in the head to love me for me. They must be a poor judge of character, but i'd love them in a heartbeat.

>>45355185
That's probably what they're thinking about us.

Oh, who am I kidding, youkai are notoriously full of themselves. (And that's partly why we love them)

>>45355215
They love us for our flaws and I think that's just grand.

Reminder: ALL Youkai are yandere. No exceptions.

Yes, even Aunn.

>>45355183
Your mansion plan makes me think about how wild it would be if I went out of my way to acquire an onsen resort in honor of Yuugi. I imagine that is something that would be much more difficult to do outside of Japan. Still, I can picture it. I'd have the art and decor be vaguely oni themed. Maybe even have a sake distillery on the grounds somewhere. I know fuck all about running a hotel or making alcohol but it's fun to imagine.

>>45355163
if only I could be there to return the favor...

>>45355495
You could be there... so you can autistically post online about her in that universe too?

>>45355307
Hey, I know fuck all about making and running a mansion and it's just as difficult a goal. You should give it a try for her sake.

>>45355269
Especially Aunn

>>45318390
what would it be like to get caught by a wolf
she's a good girl, but she's so much stronger than you

>>45356770
Yes because I would have too much anxiety to ever approach her. She would have to come to me first because of that.

this little fox has the knowhow and complete lack of morals to isolate and violate me no matter the cost. my days as a free man will be numbered once she sets her sight on me. i hear that fox mating season is just around the corner too, prime time to babytrap me with a litter of tubelets.

don't worry; it's a safe day

>>45362623
I scream at her that I am going to make her crab walk in an effort to call her bluff and scare her away.

>>45362623
i cant trust a word that comes out of this vixens mouth. she probably also tracked down every condom on this side of the youkai mountian and personally poked a hole through every single one. theres simply no way id ever willingly engage in intimacy with such a notorious swindler.

>>45362715
just the tip, then

>>45362743
no chance. i hear that kitsune, especially small ones, has a vicegrip that keeps you connected no matter how hard you pull out.

>>45362780
I heard that's a giant lie and big slander spread by anti-kitsune youkai. Nothing bad happens if you put it in and kitsune certainly don't have inhuman grip strength. Don't be a coward.

>>45362623
Yes, a day where your human sperm can safely fertilize her egg