/jp/ - Otaku Culture

I'd kill you and feast on your flesh.

THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING.
But I'll spare you guys the anarcho-communist rant this time.

THIS time.

go away /a/, I'm busy

I could make a convincing trap so I'd probably be rounded up with other anons who look like they could be good traps and raped on a hourly basis.

Pretend everywhere.

It would probably be a smelly mansion.

>>6582420
i'd shit on every floor in every room

We'd all have our own rooms and never leave them and so never see anyone else. Meido would be there and take care of all housework. S/he'd deliver any food/packages to our doors and it would be like room service. Since we have a mansion we'd obviously also be rich and could live the NEET live for ever. I often have this delusion ;_;

I'd cover the floor with lego to fend off intruders.

>>6582472
oh god, my feet

>>6582420
We'd all hate everything about each other but be too trapped by cultural norms to say anything. Just like every other cohabiting group.

One day /jp/, one of us will become a billionaire through some means. Then our dream will become a reality. We will start a VN/translation company and work from the mansion.

>>6582472
Been using that trap since I was 5.

>>6582492
That's a funny way to say
>I'll enslave you and have you translating 24/7 through electric discharges so I can enjoy my VNs.

>>6582492
I think Mugen is probably closest. Would you be happy if we all lived in a mansion under Uncle Mugen's rulte?

>>6582492
I'll take the case.

I'll paint it red as well, so you can feel some at home at Scarlet Devil Mansion.

>>6582492
I think Mugen is probably closest. Would you be happy if we all lived in a mansion under Uncle Mugen's rule?

>What if /jp/ lived in a mansion together?

Round table discussions about VNs,eroge,doujins,dating sims,loli and video games whilst drinking tea.

Games of pretend taking place a couple of times a week.

Organized trips to Comiket every year.

Everyone has their own room and don't have to come out if they don't feel like it.

Video game tournaments with betting being allowed.

We'll live off the money we make from producing VNs,eroge and dating sims.

>>6582611
And every now and then, someone breaks in and starts putting up Saten pictures all over the house.

>>6582632
If my room can't be full of Saten pics, than I don't want to live in this mansion. Adieu!

might look a little like this

>>6582652
Get going.

>>6582652
Where all you guys came from I will never understand.

>>6582632
>breaks in
You are implying that it couldn't be an inside job.

Let's all save up and buy an old oil platform, like Sealand. FUCK YOU, OTHER NATIONS, I'M OPTING OUT OF CITIZENSHIP.

>>6582656

Isn't that a guest's house?

>>6582652
You could have them in your room, just don't put them up around the damn halls.
I would kill you if you did. So would most of everyone else.

>>6582661
Reported for implying.

>>6582611
>Organized trips to Comiket every year.
fund it

>>6582652

>>6582632
That's what the legos are for, man. They'll never get past that trap.

We can't let you in if you don't know the password.

We can't let you in if you don't know the password.

Just the thought of that makes me blush, OP.

I would lock my door and do what I usually do, I don't really like talking to people in person.

I bet we could make a really big figurine collection together, but that would be kind of gross though.

>>6582659
/jp/

lol if you want to imagine it anon then why dont you all post pics of yourselfs to aid

i would finally stop beeing so alone.
If any of you guys are living in Argentina cap fed, would you like to live with me? im living in a hostel and i have almost no privacy. Everyone realized i only leave my room to eat poop and shower

>>6582768
>eat poop and shower
I hope that needs a comma or two, or you can't live in the mansion.

>>6582765
You're banned from the mansion.

Autism mansion.

>>6582768
>eat poop and shower

>>6582782
Yeah, but i do poop and shower in a secuence, because there is no bidet and i just can't have my ass dirty with shit. (Toilet paper just doesn't work, long life the ass shower).
I also pee in a bottle i hide in my room and throw it away during the night.

>>6582753

It's only gay if balls touch and the balls touch part is grey area on /jp/

>>6582805
>Toilet paper just doesn't work, long life the ass shower

My grand fantasy is waking up one day to find myself as a 2D girl in a large room. I would obviously be shocked and try to investigate (after masturbating for hours of course), only to find other girls like me and join up with them. Eventually, one of them would let a /jp/-related reference slip, only for everyone else to catch it, revealing that all "girls" are in fact former /jp/ Anonymous. We'd investigate further and discover that we're in an absurdly large mansion with all needs covered. Eventually we'd come upon maids, who'd inform us that they're also Anonymous sent here before us to arrange for the later arrivals. Then they'd seperate us into pairs pre-arranged depending on our personalities and send us to our rooms.

The rooms would be lavishly decorated with a large number of books. Obviously, most of us wouldn't care about that at first and instead seduce our roommates, but eventually sex would get boring and we would wish to become proper young ladies, studying etiquette, tea culture, cooking, gardening and so on. Some of us would be impatient and come out of their rooms quickly while others would want to be knowledgeable about various topics and read at length on those, but time would be twisted so that everybody steps out of their rooms at about the same time into a perfect society consisting entirely of elegant young maidens.

>>6582908
Over the course of the next few weeks, we'd claim the empty rooms within the mansion according to our interests: One Anonymous contributing music to OC threads may find a music room to their liking and teach how to play to their fellow maidens, eventually becoming an onee-sama figure smiling warmly and ruffling her charges' hair when they play well. Another who likes books could take over a library, cosplaying alternatively as Patchouli, Nya, Unseen University's Librarian (orangutan moe~) and such depending on request. The gardens would be tended by talented young girls who harvest fresh ingredients for Anonymous interested in cooking, who would in turn call all of us for a feast every noon and night, while spices and herbs would be used to make new tea recipes to be tried out during the afternoon.

Of course, we'd have crushes, most likely on our roommates, and constantly try to improve so that we can impress her, giving the object of our affections presents like handcooked food and hand-sewn clothing while blushing, or coming up with more /jp/-related gifts such as translating a VN or teaching Japanese to her. And during the night we could either sleep in our rooms or use a large communal bed able to hold all of us, where Anonymous knowledgeable in history would tell us obscure tales about historical or legendary figures with a soothing voice while patting our heads.

Being a cute girl and taking it easy forever alongside /jp/ is my sole wish.

i want to play the nonary game with jp
let's develop our morphogenetic field so we get rich on stock exchange

I think Mugen offered one of his warehouses a while back.

>>6582912
>Being a cute girl and taking it easy forever alongside /jp/ is my sole wish.
You're a good man. I hope your dream comes true for all our sakes.

Yes, and with our experiences we base off the /jp/ sitcom idea in the mansion.

>>6582912
The best about that is being able to come up with a new name for yourself.

>>6582968
I'm thinking of Elise.

>>6582968
I'm thinking of Elisa.

>>6582947

Would Mugen really approve of a bunch of guys freeloading and having sex in one of his warehouses?

>>6582997
Yes, if he could join in.

Bitching, nagging, fighting over opinions and people calling the police.

Wowsers, scared people and people with bad tastes in music.

Then you have kigfags all screaming to hear each other and drinking tea.

NO FUN AT ALL

>>6582997
Would it matter if we merely killed him and one of us took his place?

I'd need to have something to do around the house.

I have a driver's license, so I could drive for people who need to go places every now and then.
Maybe help out with some tasks like gardening and making food and such.
I suppose we'd need quite the industrial kitchen in order to feed everyone some decent meals.
The thought of just having endless amounts of cup-noodles shipped to our place does seem a little strange.
I think I'd like working in the administration office which could double as a postal service. Then you could all get your figurines delivered to your rooms during my daily mail round.

When I finish my education and save up a decent amount of money and don't have much more to spend it on, I'll buy a somewhat big, empty garage somewhere and build up a decent office and living facilities inside. Then I will go to /jp/ and seek out everyone with talent in writing, drawing, composing and/or programming, and invite them over to live in my garage and work together under my management to make galge. We shall be known as the Garuge Garage

>>6583013
We could report each other for breach of contract or something.
Loud music and being a fag in general, etc.
Once you get enough reports you get promoted. And if someone abuses the system, we'll just add Captcha.

So, like, what do we do when the feds come to bust us on charges of child pornography, illicit sexual activities and mass copyright infringement? I mean, it's a big house, so we'll need a few hidden panic rooms for when this inevitability happens, as well as Scooby Doo Haunted House infrastructure of the complex.

And could I make my own X Jet and store it under the pool? Pretty please?

All I ask is to have the most feminine trap sent to my room three times a day. Once in the morning,afternoon and evening and a decent internet connection.

>>6583051
>illegal content
Man the .50 cals, gentlemen. We're about to get raided.

>>6583051
To get in, you must swear off 3D.
This includes CP.

If you lust for that stuff, ask someone to drive you to the nearest town and have him pick you up the next day.
You could stay at a hotel in town.
We'd need a daily shopping expedition for groceries anyway, so getting dropped off at day one and picked up at day 2 shouldn't be a problem.

So long as I have a half decent connection to the net, my own room and a lock on my door, it'd be a blast.

>>6583051
I suggest a /jp/ base on the moon. I estimate Otome Function will come out about the time we finish it.

In fact, the moon is too close, we should try for Charon. When astronauts land on the Pluto's moon, they'll be shocked to see it terraformed and soon find a mansion full of little girls elegantly drinking tea together with the pinky finger extended.

>>6583147
Too distant for solar power. We'd have to bring fissionable nuclear material, and connections to the internet would be wicked slow.
"I pinged Google, but I didn't get a response for over an hour!"

Is it a bad sign if I imagined being denied entry from the mansion before I even imagined what living in the mansion with /jp/ would be like

>>6583147
Fuck that cold shit. We're going to download as much shit as possible, then fly off to Gliese 581 g before fucking /tv/ gets there and calls it "Vulcan".

go check out the archive of /a/, this thread's a re-run from there

>>6583147
Even if we all got hold of one billion American dollars this wouldn't be possible.

I'd also like to keep the mansion on earth.
Preferably in Japan.

I vote for the mansion to have a bar where the bartender could select the jazz album he wanted to play.
Then I suppose the mansion budget would include training of some of our people to actually be able to make something that isn't just pouring straight drinks into the same kind of glass.

Maybe I'm a bit out of place suggesting this; but I think it would make sense to have some fairly spacious rooms with comfortable furniture where we could bring our laptops and just hang around.
I-it's not like I'm not satisfied with hanging out with my waifus all day or anything, i-I just want to see some of you other guys every now and then, ok?

>>6582908
I know I'll be told to get out of /jp/ numerous times. But I've never, and maybe will never, want to be the little girl. I would want to be the grandfather figure of the household, taking care of my precious little maidens, and scolding them when they get out of place. A fatherly gentleman butler, who always tries to look his best for meido, his unrequited love.

>>6583228
I've always wanted to be called papa.

>>6583222
sort of like this?

>>6583147
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hashima_Island

I've always wanted to own this place
You guys wanna pool our money and renovate it?
We'll only need a few hundred billion or so

>>6583242
forgot pic

Captcha: the Ariutist

>>6583189
Come on, it's only a maximum lag of about 6,5 hours at the aphelion. Besides, we can set up a network using the computers we bring there, we'd only be dependent on Earthlings for the Comiket bounty and new VN releases.

>>6583247
Renovate? It's like I live there already.
Don't mess with perfection; you'll ruin my post-apocalyptic fantasy world.

>>6583195
Well, you will have to present your personal papers to someone like me at the reception when you arrive with your stuff, so if you can't manage that, it's a no-go.

Actually I think we shouldn't allow anyone addicted to hard drugs.
I'd also prefer people who could present a clean crime record - having internal strifes over people stealing each other's shit would be awful. Violence isn't welcome either since not everybody knows aikido.

What about figures? Where would we store them?

>>6583294
In your room jackass, you're not living in a dumpster anymore.

>>6583254
Maybe a bit darker with a black ceiling and bar, and with the chairs at the bar closer together.

The other stuff looks good. I like the lights in the ceiling.
Noted for my interior design ideas of the place.

>>6583255
Which would be YEARS behind. I suppose it would be just a time-lag scenario once we got going, and the difference would be negligible, but that first delivery ship better be taking off a few weeks behind us. The economics behind the initial supply train would be staggering.
It would be rather amusing to communicate primarily via private imgboard on the house server.

>>6583272
you best be betting that there will be heavy weed smoking going on

>>6583272
>Actually I think we shouldn't allow anyone addicted to hard drugs.
I'd also prefer people who could present a clean crime record - having internal strifes over people stealing each other's shit would be awful. Violence isn't welcome either since not everybody knows aikido.

Well fuck you too, buddy. You act like I already robbed you for drug money.

>>6583272

Eh, guess those are reasonable measures, with some exceptions.

I just figured they'd deny people based on personal taste and it would become a messy high school clique affair.

Can't we just annex the white house or something

>>6583303
Best be keepin' the Blues Bros intact.

it would smell like semen

>>6583358

That's an aphrodisiac for some people.

>>6583358
all under the garden
Was all you were needing when you still believed in me
say what you want to say
Hang for your hollow ways.
Moving your mouth to pull out
All your miracles aimed for meeeeee.

>>6583363
Get out of here /mu/. The mansion is /jp/ only.

>>6583294

Think big. Forget those tiny pieces of plastic. Instead you have life-sized statues and fountains in the image of your waifu.

>>6583309
As long as the weed smoking is kept in one part of the mansion, I'm fine with it.
I don't want my room to smell like that shit if the guy who lives under my room practically turns his room into a stoner's den.

>>6583332
The guys in the suits?
Well, I was thinking about myself being one of them, so they can stay no problem.

I think we should have a democracy sort of thing going, just so that our budget doesn't go out of control.
Spending whatever you have of your own money is outside of the mansion budget, but I'd expect everyone who's able to throw in a coin or to to do so.
Purchases for everyone to use would be part of the budget, so if a lot of people think that the IT crew should operate a printing shop (paper, canvas) as well as general maintenance, we'd have to have a meeting about it.

I wish there were a way for us to get all together and work towards some serious money. And then pull out something like this. Living with a brotherhood who understands my ways would indeed be very much entertaining.

We'd have a massive weed garden and get blazed errrrryday

>>6583380
I don't really care about the politics so long as someone lets me shout at a meeting about them, "/jp/ has no king! /jp/ needs no king!"

>this thread

Go back to /a/

Why so much junkies ? You can count me out.

Tissue.


Tissue everywhere

>>6583410
Implying /jp/ doesn't rub it on their bellies?

>>6583403
Good riddance.
If I can't watch Gundam high, I don't want to live.

>>6583409
pero pero, pero perooo, perooo perooooooooo pero pero perooooooooooo

>>6582824

Suddenly K-ON thread? Too bad this will never happen, just like the /a/ island.

meiiiiiiiiidooooo!

>>6583487
The thread starts with
>What if
We are openly fantasizing, so stop hating there is no harm.

Welp looks like the thread is over. It was fun while it lasted.

No Fun allowed.jpg and all that stuff.

How can you imagespam so fast?

>>6583399
>>6583401
>>6583402
>>6583404
>>6583405
>>6583408
>>6583409
>>6583412
>>6583414
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>>6583417
>>6583418
>>6583423
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>>6583439
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>>6583448
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>>6583453
>>6583454
>>6583458
>>6583461
>>6583463
Thread just got even shittier.

If you're going to spam a thread use porn.

>>6583588
Out.

>>6583593
Said Anonymous as he posted /a/ material on /jp/

>>6583634
K-ON is more /jp/ related than this thread

>>6583634
>K-ON!
>/a/
Out.

>>6583643
fartface nooblord kon is an anime

>>6583657
U mad?

>>6583638
They are both on the same level to be honest.
>>6583643
Trying too hard.

Woa, I wasn't on the thread so I can't be sure of the contents. But just how silly buttached does one have to be to spam like that.

If you don't agree or like something just report and hide it. Stop spoiling other people's fun. Take it easy, man.

>>6583680
its sion, his butte is litirally flaming with burning rage

Right, now that that's over.

I've changed my mind. I propose we take over Lichtenstein, it'd be easier and cheaper than buying a legitimate mansion.

This reminds me of when K-ON! spammers spammed Scandaroon's threads for an entire day. I think ZUN!bar took count of how many threads there were.

Maximum autism.

Worst anime ever made.

THIS THREAD HAS ENDED PEACEFULLY

M-M-M-M-MONSTER AUTISM BUMP

>>6583811
>Not part of the EU
Why bother taking it over when we can just move there? After awhile, we could worm our way into the infrastructure and just legally annex it. That way nobody gets butthurt, and we don't have to show how beta we are when the inevitable international outcry comes up from violent regime-change.

It would be interesting, I guess. Everyone stays locked in their rooms, and people from outside always invade the mansion saying loud shit and hanging pictures from different anime series everywhere.

/jp/ missle silo? Are you a bad enough little girl to carve out your own space?

>>6583960
I like this idea. We can set up an underground village.

>>6583960
Welcome to Gensokyo over the blastdoors.

BOOF owns a bunker, I'm sure we can crash there.

>>6583960
We'll be first generation Morlocks.

If I managed to buy an island/bunker how would I be able to make the worthless mass of /jp/sies useful enough to cover overhead?

How would those of us who are talentless NEETs earn our keep in this utopia? I can't imagine the founding anons being wealthy enough to sustain this community in perpetuity, or to support the entire population of /jp/sies whose only skill is taking it easy.

All I can come up with is whoring myself out as a trap, and I'm not even sure I'd have what it takes to be a trap.

>>6584034
We just have to hope that the afterlife exists and is like this.

Oh, /jp/, how many times I have I said that we have more than enough power to make a company?

>>6584696
We have like, all sorts of skilled people, like translators, engineers and programmers. We out-manpower Carpe Fulgur and probably rival NIS America (or whatever), sort of.

>>6584034
>talentless
Just because I don't USE them doesn't mean I don't have any.
But there's the rub-- would we use them for the good of the house? Who knows for sure?

>>6584777
I tried bringing the subject up earlier in this thread, but people were too busy fantasizing about being little girls.

We'd all stay in our own rooms. The more social people will mingle. They may play mahjong together or watch each other play Touhou. The traps of /jp/ will satisfy the sexual needs of a few people. Typical stuff.

>>6584788
But seriously we have enough skill and power to get through.

We just need to get past our hangups

Hm... Im a young violinist who teaches music for a living, It would be a pleasure to teach you guys how to play some touhou/VN musics. And our comiket releases would be anxiously expected...

>>6584822
Hey, I play viola. Let's see if we can get a quartet going.

Is that the mansion from Duck Tales in OP?

>>6584829
>>6584822

>>violinist
>>viola

I smell potential for our own TAMUSIC.

>>6584829
That would be great... and after that we can get an orchestra going. After a while /jp/'s mansion would be regarded as a bastion of culture and etiquette... well I guess it doesn't hurt to dream a little... ;_;

>>6584876

Yes, but I can see we can focus and actually do things we can possibly already do.

>>6584894
This is my favorite post.
It makes the most sense.

im the violinist-kun, my brother plays piano very well and reads VNs and plays touhou... he doesn't visits /jp/ very often although.

>>6584919
We have talented and skilled people.

We just need a charter/census to get people going.

I'm an illustrator-in-training.

>>6583811

>Europe

lol no, how about an island in Hawaii instead.

How long would it take until someone goes around and seals all the doors with duck tape?

>>6582533
I "have" a mansion... it's not that big or classical by western standards but I do have several houses (and a large warehouse) inside my compound... and a swimming pool overlooking laguna lake...

While I'm really lax about house rules... there are several rules that must be strictly followed...

No Dogs or Cats or Pets allowed.

Guns should be deposited at the guard assigned at the gate [sorry BOOF]

http://d.imagehost.org/0874/MG_6119.jpg

>>6585064
I like where this is going

I demand location

I'm an artist, I'm a performance artist.

>>6585157
Philippines... money is easy here...

http://d.imagehost.org/0473/IMG_6051.jpg

Set up a /jp/ company first to earn monneh.

>>6583811
Enjoy getting assraped by Switzerland

No oxy, heroin, or opana allowed? Pussies.