/lit/ - Literature

>>18762719
I’m very new to writing, but if anyone would like to read my the first two chapters of sci-fi story on the exploration of alien oceans and catholics exploring alien religion, here’s a link to my work: https://docs.google.com/document/d/10LkV1_D--VqSGHzit_gfRasnfb1YZ5foTA4re5lIhJk/edit
(If anyone responds to this post and I don’t reply, it’s because I’ve been banned after spamming Nicoavocado’s butthole on /fit/

>>18761150
OP do you mind if i hijack your thread? I too am writing a story with alien animals, and I would love some feedback on this paragraph describing one of them.
(Leading up to this paragraph, a young girl sees a light in a pond (on an alien world) and chases it. The pond is covered in something I call whispering algae, so only the light is visible. Then she sticks her head underwater and:
>Below the red algae the light was a pale yellow, a drowning sun. It shone so brightly through the murky water that I had no problem making out a large portion of its body. The light came from a glowing patch of bioluminescence on the brow of its head. Some sort of cyst or dome that shone bright with light that could only have evolved on an alien world. The mouth was crocodilian, the nose was two slits, and the eyes were nonexistent. Behind the jaws protruded gills, rhythmically pulsing in and out. The color of the creature was black, with a series of dotted lines that ran from the head down its elongated and serpentine neck, starting red and shifting to orange. When they reached the body the orange became yellow, and the various lines converged into two. The body was slim but not so slender that it made the creature look snakelike. Four elongated legs, like those of a frog if it had gone through a medieval torture rack, sunk into the mud. A massive shark fin protruded from each shin, the tips of these shifted to a vibrant blue, much like the tail that extended far beyond the glimmer of the light. All of this was able to stay submerged in what had been no more than three or four feet of water, which looking back has led me to believe it was some kind of ambush predator.