/lit/ - Literature

>>14686188
I wanted to make video games but am too mentally ill to do anything except browse the website and pretend to work at work now.

>>14686188
God

Socialism with chinese charachteristics.
Also, start following Mao's fitness routine:
https://www.marxists.org/reference/archive/mao/selected-works/volume-6/mswv6_01.htm

>>14686188
There's a nice French novel that ends up with the main character using a baton of dynamite as a cigar to blow his head up, because that is the only possible way to be one with the universe for him.

So that, I guess.

Knowledge

pussy and drugs

Eternal life of play with the one i wanna play with, with various modes of being that serve the creation of our joy and development. To escape from all slavery and coercion. Sovernity in my own realm.

>>14686188
An end

>>14686231

This desu.

I also love my nights out with the boys. I hope good times with the boys never ends. I fucking hate that our woman friends want to be part of it

Your best bet is to make healthy lifestyle choices. If you don't like that, then drown your misery in self-destruction.

Test

Hitlerite National Socialism

>>14686188
judeau

Wine, cheese, and a good television series to help motivate me for more fiction to write.

Casca.

>>14686188
Contentment with yourself.

>>14686199
F A L S E

>>14686188
The love of a good woman and the praise of my peers. Been searching for a long time.

The rare moments of clarity experienced only after sitting quietly in an empty room for long periods of time

Love and acceptance

>>14686188
>What is it that makes you whole
Cliche or not, a smooth drive with good music and a beautiful sunset and/or environment, particularly when I'm driving without a destination. Rarely do I feel more free and glad and whole than when all of that comes together.

Back when I was far less stable and far more suicidal I remember driving on a beautiful summer evening, the sun golden and orange and warm, down a road listening to a wind ensemble and in one moment everything came together so perfectly, so completely, that I felt so genuinely content that the first and only thought in my head was to kill myself there and then in order to have my final moments be as perfect and golden as they possibly could be.

>>14686188
if you're a man, the answer is God. if you're a woman, the answer is a big veiny dick in your cunt. luckily, both are omnipresent for the respective parties.

Absolutely nothing, its not worth seeking. Just live.

>>14689156
nigger

In all seriousness I don't think there's anything for me right now. No family, serious long term relationship with gf ended, pretty poor, not in school, an okay enough job, and no car

But oddly enough I'm alright, depression and anxiety still exist of course and I'm not sure I feel whole but I'm not doing terrible, I've survived worse than this and this isn't the most ideal situation but what keeps me going are my hobbies and knowing that I am only alive for one real reason and that's for myself

Even though life is shit sometimes and I get in bad little cycles I'm not really worried about finding some cure all or book or ideology to keep me going or feeling whole because I think that's a mindset of never having enough or never feeling like your quite there yet

I suggest trying to make some irl buddies and occupying yourself and you'll hit the comfy zone where you aren't "missing" anything

>>14689138
If you killed yourself then you would have never been able to have another moment like that again. Glad you're still here buddy

>>14686188
Finding the perfect grandiose delusion that can’t be disproven and doesn’t make me appear insane

>>14686188
Revenge.

>>14686188
Sunshine; nature; blue skies; the forest; silent walks through the woods; a cool winters night; freshly covered trees with snow; a calm thawing lake in spring; the summer breeze bristling my hair; my love’s soft soothing touch; the giddy of playing children; smiles of sincerity; twinkles of the eye; my brother; my sister; mom and dad; childhood memories; future possibilities; companionship - I am still severely depressed.

>>14686188
There's not one thing each day brings something new.

>>14689226
>If you killed yourself then you would have never been able to have another moment like that again. Glad you're still here buddy

It took me a long time to think of it in that way. Truly wanting to kill yourself is a kind of trench that it's hard to see over or out of - I thought it about it just about every day from my mid-teens on, and tried a good number of times. And just about nobody - not my family, pretty much not my friends - knew. Not really, anyway. It was about 2 years ago now that I reached what is, at least now, my lowest point. Barely hung on by a thread and it felt like my only options were to have a complete mental breakdown or legitimately, finally kill myself. I returned to Christ and, though it's been a difficult journey, things have ultimately gotten better than I ever let myself imagine, and I never would've had any of it if I hadn't gotten that low.

I'm sure someone will call me out on it, or say that it's a life-long cope now, the way drug addicts and AA people often seem to over-preach as compensation, but it is the Truth to me and what got me out of that trench. I can see beauty now, better than before. I can believe in goodness.

Thanks for the kind words, anon. I hope the best for you too.

You can't not be whole, you can only trick yourself into believing a part of you is missing and be disappointed when you don't find it.
Might be like a survival mechanism or maybe something to do with the mode of production, I haven't decided yet.

Sunshine; nature; navy skies; dark forests; silent meadows; crisp winters; spring ponds; summer’s surly; lovers love; giddy children; sweet smiles; fluttering eyes; lost brothers; annoyed sisters; caring parents; quiet childhoods; past futures; heartfelt hope; - I am still severely depressed.

love

hate

>>14686188
watching this anime for the first time recently, amazing stuff

>>14686188
The only times I’ve felt that wholeness are when I’m out at night walking empty streets and just taking everything in. It’s the only time I can really feel calm and at peace with everything. I like the solitude in those moments, but find it unbearable most other times. I think my life would be complete if I had somebody to walk with and who felt the same, but that’s probably just the emotional horniness

>>14686188
a big fat cock.

>>14686188
The novelty of learning

>>14689357
Its got a downside; nothing else is nearly as good

>>14686199
/thread

>>14686188
mountains and mountains of cum

>>14689234
Now this is a chad goal. That's basically what philosophy is all about.

>>14686188
Absolute knowing

>>14686188
Recognizing the fact that you are whole all the time, trying to find something constantly is the cope for the weak. Everything we find is a surplus that only feeds our greed.

>>14686200
Mao was a lardass.

>>14689052
seethe more

>>14687730
He deserved to live a long life with Casca. Alas.

>>14686188
nothing will ever make me feel whole

>>14690048
Wholeness comes after we die.

>>14690053
All we can do is hope, I don't share your optimism at this point in my life

>>14686188
His death was the single most hilarious part in Berserk. I couldn't stop laughing, reminded me of Don Quixote in that respect.

You can't really get it if you didn't read the page before and after this but I couldn't find those so here.

>all these fags itt who enjoys "things" but can never find "a thing"
Sad.

I hoard my golden apple, because I found it, and it is mine, I am wise because I keep my knowledge. Teeh hee tee hee!

>>14689144
>if you're a man, the answer is God. if you're a woman, the answer is a big veiny dick in your cunt. luckily, both are omnipresent for the respective parties.
This is the correct answer.
Also, God is good but dick is better

>>14686188
That, what makes you whole, is enlightenment.

>>14689052
Moth blown the fuck out.

>>14686188
Freedom

>>14686188
The latest product and/or life scheme promoted by any of the various global media corporations and their stockholders

>>14689314
mfw reading this post

Any books with this feel?

>>14690012
But I am content with myself

>>14690053
The exact opposite happens. That why it’s death. You are diseased