/lit/ - Literature

So far, I know: He is from New York, he went to school in Seattle, and he is graduating in New Orleans. He reads Tom Robbins, and we shared the same favorite Vonnegutian short story, Harrison Bergeron. He watches Futurama (he wore a shirt with Fry's face in its center), he is about twice my height, and he can hold conversation with me very well.

What he knows: I am not in school, I wrote a book, I am writing a book, I am doing research for another book, I read too much true crime, and I have tattoos of two of Kurt Vonnegut's line drawings. He knows I write more than read, and that I have had the same dehumanizing job for much too long.

Since I first e-mailed him, I have received a response from him, and I have responded to his response. Mine are lengthy, so I will avoid the copying and pasting of them.

His response to the first message:

Kxxxxxx,
Sorry for the delay in response. My professors think it's motivational to make us slog through tedium with the carnival on the horizon. We'll have most of next week off, officially or otherwise, so I suppose I understand their slave driving.

Thanks for the loverly story. Despite my threatening gestures and grand announcements of DOOM, I will not be too critical in reviewing it.

You have a good vocabulary and you write with slightly out of date syntax. You're an avid reader and it shows with your word choice. Describing a rustic and human scene with educated language is a neat juxtaposition.

I'm going to leave the general grammar alone. You didn't use the dreaded semicolon, awkward colon, or killitwithfuckingfire hyphen. Well played, milady. Those blackguards will verily wreck some prose the hell up.

Time to roll out the compliments! "Ballerina deer" is your best part of this entry. It's immediately evocative and simple. After that line was written I can imagine you kicking your feet up on the table and leaning backwards while donning a pair of sunglasses. Dope. Also, the "Ohmanohmanoman" lead in seemed really appropriate when you take the educated style of your writing into account. That break made the regular style seem tongue in cheek, like some kind of anthropological study. I'm not sure of your intent, but if that was on purpose it was well conceived. If it was by accident, consider writing something in an entirely down-to-earth manner, using your normal spoken language. It's a neat exercise, and I think you'll see that it's just as easy to communicate in vernacular as traditional prose.

I did enjoy reading this. Thanks for having the guts to send it to me after my villainous departure. As promised I will give you my number. You're welcome to call me anytime after Mardi Gras. Things will be too surreal this week for socializing.

For what it's worth, I wanted to give you my number when we met in the "I will ask you out for coffee because you are interesting and attractive"-sense. It's always nice to meet another lit nerd regardless.

-Pxxxx Kxxxxxx
xxx-xxx-xxxx
[I respond well to texts]

--------------------------------------

Now, my question is:
Does /lit/ believe any passion will be formed from this potential love, created by a mutual interest in writing and literature? Is there a certain approach I should be taking, that I am not already? What does /lit/ think he is thinking?

He Wants Your Velvet-Lined Pussy

anyway dude sounds like kind of a dork but if he's cute go for it

>>>/adv/

>thinking /lit/ knows a thing about relationships
merp

you're just posting on here because you think he browses /lit/. Admit it

>>1610196


/adv/ is not my peer. /adv/ would have no interest or knowledge in a literature geek's love. I'd probably get redirected here.

Is it too soon to write a love letter? Potential love really gets to me. I want things to happen, but I have absolutely no patience.

>>1610197

This, as well.

>>1610197

Honestly, though, I hope he does not.

>>1610184
DAT FUCKING TATTOO

please tell it's yours.

>>1610206
It is. This one, however, was my first. I got it a month after he died, in memory.

>>1610208
I'd fuck you if you didn't have that stupid shit indelibly on your body. What a waste.

>>1610208
i'm fapping at the speed of light to the idealised notion of a well-read, attractive woman.

>>1610214
What you really must consider is:

Would I fuck you?

Absolutely not.

>>1610219
Print screened.

>>1610223
So it's win-win. I have no respect for any woman who blows her money on such stupid, permanent garbage.

ITT: fap-addicted, basement-dwelling virgins.

>>1610229
You obviously have no respect for women in general. If you first ask yourself "would I fuck her?", there is no respect for the woman to even gain.

Good luck on your quest to find whatever concept you consider to be love.

>>1610229
why so angry? what do you have against tattoos and women?

>>1610236
fap-addicted, attic-dwelling, non-virgin here.

>>1610223
You ma'am, are a gentlelady among pigs. Even if your thread is /adv/ material.

Is his name Geoff?

>>1610236
ITT: fap-addicted, basement-dwelling virgins who think reading Vonnegut is being well-read.

Fix'd.

>>1610244
PS: OP can have a profound, tragic relationshit with the man or a shortlived but passionate seasonal affair.

those are your options.

>>1610255
What would happen if I were to stick him in the friend zone, in attempt to keep him around longer?

>>1610259

You fucking bitch. You. Fucking. Bitch.

>>1610259

Do it, go to a party, get slightly drunk, then see what happens. If anything happens and it's not awkward the next day, you're in there.

That's how I met my boyfriend.

>>1610259
i smell troll a imposter but anyways,

it would either turn him into a basement-dwelling, fap- addicted, misogynist or he would use the experience as a motivation to write a Kundera-esque novella.

>>1610274
Not imposter. You must understand that I am one of you guys, I know you guys inside-out. The only difference is the body, with which I get better results.

>>1610264
It'd probably have to be a one-on-one thing. We don't have any mutual friends, and there is a big age difference.

>>1610263
Sorry. Some of you ask for it.

I don't want to stick him in the friend zone, but I also don't want something short-lived. I also just recently made the decision to date only women, but has happenstance fucked me, as usual.

I kind of agree with the guy who was knocking her tats. The Blue Monday one isn't so bad, but the OP pic is just a really ugly eyesore that says little more than "hey, world, I read some books!"

pic related

>You didn't use the dreaded semicolon, awkward colon, or killitwithfuckingfire hyphen. Well played, milady. Those blackguards will verily wreck some prose the hell up.

ha ha ha wow he sounds like a full-on retard.

>/adv/ is not my peer. /adv/ would have no interest or knowledge in a literature geek's love. I'd probably get redirected here.

Ha ha ha and you're a pretentious cunt.

How about reading something written in the past ten years, anyways? I know Vonnegut has a lot of books, but at least half of them are garbage, certainly nothing worth putting on your skin. People who claim to be "literature geeks" but only like highschool standbys and can't keep up with the contemporary scene are worse than people who claim to be "literature geeks" but have legitimate reasons to. How long has it been since you've actually read a book? Yeah, I figured. "Writers" like you don't read.

Jesus Christ, I couldn't be this stupid if I tried. I know this is an anonymous forum, but I'd still be embarrassed to post something like this.

Back to watching Star Driver

>>1610293
continue to flirt with him for a prolonged period over email or whatever. eventually start hanging out or whatever. realise that you might as well be dating and confront him about it. mutually agree to be dating. long-term relationshit established.

enjoy your tragedy, or decline into mediocrity as a couple in LOVE.

This sounds similar to the premise for The Secretary.

>The only difference is the body, with which I get better results.

lol this sounds like a sentence from a Viagra spam e-mail

>>1610299

Again, on tattoos, what if there was not money being "wasted" on the tattoos? What if they were just there, illustrating their owners' interests, with no price behind them?

Half of my tattoos were done by myself, for the small cost of some non-toxic inks and sewing needles.

One thing I like most about Vonnegut's writing, is when he incorporates drawings. When I was a child, I wanted to be a cartoonist, then an illustrator. Once a teen, I wanted to be a psychiatrist, then a detective, then a psychologist. Now, entering my twenties, I want to be an author, and Vonnegut was a huge inspiration in my discovery.

>>1610347
Waaa waaaa someone online finally told me the truth about my tats. Why did my friends lie to me and say they looked great? Whyyyyyyy?!

>>1610184

pic reminds me of that Stephen King short called "Sometimes they Come Back" or something, the one about the astronaut orbitting Venus who gets outbreaks of those alien eye things on his skin.

>>1610351

I have my parents for that.

>>1610190
This makes him sound like a total dick, who is either trying way too hard to impress you (and it's working apparently) or he is truly a 'total dick'.
Just because you write doesn't mean you have to write the way you 'write', if you follow me. ESPECIALLY if you're writing to a fucking person and not writing a story that is intentionally supposed to be non-conversational.

Where do you work btw? Are you in NYC?

>>1610381

Well, I do LOVE dicks.

I work at a smoothie bar in NOLA.

>>1610381
or perhaps he's just a nervous tryhard like everyone else from /lit/ when corresponding with a girl?

>>1610385
I've always wanted to go there. Interesting city, I hear. Ever visit Paul Morphy's mansion?

>>1610388
>like everyone else from /lit/ when corresponding with a girl

nah. this dude clearly stands out as something a little less 'cool'.

Is /lit/ jealous, or something?

Or am I just getting all of the immature guys?

>>1610397
>i will never meet a nice writer guy in a coffee shop and hit it off.

>>1610397

Never mind, I forget I am asking all of this on 4chan.

>>1610397
What answer are you looking for? I was being entirely honest with my post and wasn't trying to be offensive like that 'I would fuck you' idiot.

But you feel like you can keep talking to the guy, then do it. If you're wondering whether he's interested in you, then his last couple of lines in that email confirms his interest. He just came off like a dick in that email is all I'm saying, despite the whole 'we are potential lovers because we both love reading..' bit. Do what you feel like doing.

>Or am I just getting all of the immature guys?

Welcome to 4chan.

Do whatever you want, whether or not your both douchbags or not (too lazy to read the whole thread). I doubt anyone on here will be able to tell you what's going to happen so use your noggin.

>>1610409

I will, I will.

Fare well, /lit/

>>1610411

>your

That was awful, I apologize devoutly.

>>1610414
So what happened to us being your 'peers'?
>>>/adv/

/r/ing moar pics of OP

>>1610421

Hey, meow. I was just saying I was done with my search for answers. /lit/ is still my favorite board. Of the moment. I spend just as much time lurking /ic/, but this is the only board on which I will post. At the moment.

>>1610425
Nothing special.

>>1610437
I find you attractive, and that's only partly because you look like Amelie (sorry, you must get that like 1,000,000 times a day).

>>1610443

Audrey Tautou? nha more like ramona flowers

saged and reported

>>1610437
Oh, howdy howdy pusskin, do not be dowdy, blushkin,
For our time here is brief, like you said
An oak that outlived our grandfathers
Will remain when our grandchildren are dead

So, my rowdy pusskin, do not not let's not make a fusskin
So give into my lustin, and run away with me.

Next time don't tell us about the guy, and just start a thread about vonnegut, or a thread asking for us to look at your writing.

sage in all fields

>>1610448

>>1610453

Want to read what I sent him?

>>1610437

I'd enjoy getting served coffee from you and having a literary chat once in a while.

If I was actually the kind of faggot that went into smoothie bars

>>1610459
OP confirmed for attention starved whore.

in b4 white knights

>>1610467
there are no white knights on /lit/.
Just pretentious faggots and corrosive bitches.

>>1610465

K, I have your attention!

I had an amazing day, yesterday. Once I acquired full consciousness, I lolly-gagged around my friend, Samantha’s, childhood bedroom for an hour. I wasted some time on the Internet, and emailed a friend about my recent dreams. I did not consider starting the active part of my day until Sam’s mother called me downstairs, asking, "Are you ready?". Of course, my immediate thought was, "Ready for what?". She did not give me a definite answer, so I gave up momentarily to meditate while brushing my teeth, instead of following my obsessive compulsive routine of brushing teeth. In the car, I avoided questioning her at first, but the confusion on top of being uninformed was getting to me. What I eventually determined before arriving was "it’s her friend’s house", "they burn a lot of wood", "it’s very rustic", and "there are a lot of cars on the property". If you do not know me, then you do not know that I will ask as many questions as I find necessary in order to understand.

We arrive to a castle built of logs and stone, with at least ten obviously unused vehicles littering the front lawn. Everything in sight was covered in inches of fresh snow. It was beautiful, and it was only the driveway. Samantha’s mother directed me toward the door, and I knocked. A young man answered and, in retrospect, I was a bit rude. I do not think I ever properly introduced myself, but I did depart knowing his name and he knowing mine. When greeted by Not-Yet-Dome, I immediately asked him where I could find Sam, and he directed me toward the master bedroom.

At that moment in time, I was so overwhelmed by everything that I did not notice anything. I entered the bedroom and found Samantha lying in bed, next to an endangered species of a man. He was introduced to me as "B", but I left knowing him as "Father William". They were watching Avatar, and their being distracted gave me perfect opportunity to appreciate my surroundings. I was walking into someone else’s story, and the story teller, fortunately, was still well and willing to tell his tale.

There were antiques everywhere, and they were all put to use. There was a wooden children’s chair with a quilted puppy pillow being used as its cushion, exhibiting generations of use and wear. There was an old Mac desktop on the dresser at the foot of the bed, seemingly one of the newer acquirements. As I counted mirrors, I began to smell the wood. I could not control myself, and I internally commended myself for bringing my book bag. I pulled out a notebook and pen, and I was ready to map the place out. I was in awe of this house, and even more in awe of this man.

Sam found a case of cigarettes that had been containing unfiltered Pall Malls. She was about to light one, when I asked if I could light it for her, just to have a single drag. She handed it to me, and Father William handed me a pack of matches with which to light the cigarette. I struck a couple, but they must have been wet, because I could not get either to light. He handed me another pack, and lucky strike. I told him I contained a lighter in my book bag, and if he would like it, he was more than welcome to take it.

This is when he told me the story of why he only uses matches. "I woke up on a beach one day and all I had in my pocket was a pack of cigarettes. I wanted to smoke one, but I didn't have a lighter. There was a bar on the beach, and I asked the bartender if he could light my cigarette. I noticed he only had one hand. I didn't think too much of it at first, because it was a time after war; missing limbs were common. He'd pull out and strike a match in the same amount of time it would take you to pull out a cigarette. This made me think further. I asked him why he didn’t just use a lighter. He said, 'Lighters ruin the taste'. Now I only use matches." He then explained that he lives by several persons’ examples, as do I.

I would like to think that I could have fallen in love with this antique man at that moment, but I later met his wife. To give you an idea of what I first noticed when meeting him, he had a shade of dark brown all over his body. I was not sure if he had even thought to bathe since the beginning of winter. He was wearing this sweater, which had the ends of the sleeves and the belly cut out of it. The bits of fabric missing were replaced with leather patches. His pants looked to be constructed of multiple animal hides stitched together. His shoes, however, must have been of the same, original animal hide. There was a lot of stitching put into this unconventionally beautiful suit. He had a long, dark but silvery beard, and, with the help of a wool beanie, approximately 85% was hidden.

Samantha offered me a tour, and she asked Dome, the doorman, to guide us. Sam asked me how many cars I thought were on the property. My best guess was 18, hers 25+, and Dome said 15. We agreed to count. We trudged around in the snow for a minute, heading towards the back of the castle. This family seemingly had not ever thrown a thing away. They recycled, but in a different way. Everything had an alternate use, and if it did not, Father William would find a use for it.

While trying not to slip down a beaten path made icy from recent snow storms, we were "interrupted" by a ballerina deer, and another, and two smaller ones. Dome "shoo"ed them, but I felt as though we were the ones distracting them from their dance. We walked between walls, twice my height, of cut firewood. During the tour, I counted at least 15 unused cars. There were old VWs, Volvos, Fords, and motorbikes of different makes. I poked around two different basements, and Father William eventually came to show me a secret passageway, about which I had been inquiring. He showed me his steam-heating system, on which he had been working for the past year, and explained its process. He told me if I were to ever visit, with enough time to work out an apprenticeship, he would teach me masonry.

Ohmanohmanohman. The tower was still in its construction stages, so it was surrounded by scaffolding as tall as itself. You're damned right, I climbed that scaffolding! Father William followed me up five stories of ladders and scaffolds, and we stopped to take a break and a look around. It was beautiful. The sun was setting, but it was behind us. I had not felt so content in such a way for a very long time. I told Father William, this activity reminded me of climbing the Sydney Harbor Bridge when I was in Australia. I probably had not felt as great as I did in Connecticut since I had been in Australia. This saying a lot, because I met my first love on my trip to Australia, that being the best time of my life.

We descended once his wife arrived, which was also the first time in three weeks. Samantha had the family reuniting. We made our formal acquaintances inside. Father William's life partner's name is Carrington. We told riddles and jokes around the chimney fire, drank coffee, and Father William showed me some of the oldest books in his library, which consisted of every book Father William had ever owned, on shelves stretching towards the ceiling and hugging the walls. He showed me one of the original dictionaries of the English language, written by Webster, published by Merriam.

Eventually, Willy showed up. He is Father William’s son, and he is not nearly as amazing as his father. We had dinner, which consisted of baked potatoes and hamburgers; both were very delicious. Willy and Sam told stories of the two of them partying, getting laid, and getting lost. It was a spiritually eventful night. I had no outward concerns, I wanted to be where I once had been, where I am, and where I will be. I wanted to be myself, and I wished to be king. This all, unfortunately, ended around 7.45 pm, when Samantha’s mother arrived. We kidnapped Willy, he bought a bottle of wine, and a lottery ticket for each of us.

The remainder of the night was spent inside, playing poker with pennies. In Father William's presence, I wished to be king. In the presence of my poker peers, I reigned king.

>approximately 85% of his face was hidden

ok, i want to fuck you so hard now oh god

NGGGGGGG

Why does this read like a /tg/ rpg scenario?

>>1610498
Willy Willy Willy Willy....

>>1610498

I wanted my modern adventure to seem more like a traditional one. I tried.

>>1610510
You suck at writing. It's terrible. The whole time, you're cramming a square peg into a circular hole. You never get it in.

>>1610514
Is that what she said?

>>1610514

You suck at critiquing. If you really wanted me to feel that, you would have given an example.

Bring ittttttt.

>>1610518
Not that guy. Your prose could do with a little work. The characters' voices don't seem so consistent, like at:
He then explained that he lives by several persons’ examples, as do I.
That totally fucked me over, though the rest of the paragraph was alright.

>>1610518

But if you troll (derp), congrats for my bite.

>wtfamireading.jpeg

>>1610524

Always working on it, thanks for noting that. I will edit this again tonight.

Unfortunately, I have no traditional schooling in creative writing. All I have to work with is the form I learned in high school, and my imagination.

I still need to find my voice and style, which can be hard to develop when you have no assignments or time. I need a challenge.

OP is a trolling cunt. I bet she's not even a woman. If she was, she would have showed us her boobs by now.

>>1610547
That's only a problem if you let it be. The only thing you can do is to practice writing, and learn to critically appraise your own work, which an academic course may or may not give you. So don't sweat it broski.

>>1610555

NO U

That 'story' is a troll, right? riiiiight?

Go for it, OP.

But if you both are writer types, don't expect to leave your dehumanizing job anytime soon.

C'est la vie :(

>>1610547

It isn't particularly bad. I don't think you need to have taken classes, reading enough books should do that for you.

If that's what you emailed to the guy I have no clue wtf he's response was about if I'm honest. Vocabulary, ruining prose with semicolons, yeah I think he's full of shit or trying to get in your knickers unless he's referring to something utterly different.

>>1610569
Kind of. The ending is a troll.

>>1610568
It's OK. Prostitution is good money.

>>1610581
Oh god, I totally didn't read the start of the thread. OP, the guy's a pretentious faggot, who's trying to impress you with pretentious faggotry.
>Describing a rustic and human scene with educated language is a neat juxtaposition.
Bleeeuuuurrrghhh....

NOT /LIT/ NOT /LIT/

>>1610589

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO HEAR.

I know a couple of you kind of said it before, but neither of you were convincing.

I need to know that he's just saying "Hey, it's not that great, but I think you're really cute, so I will say it's loverly."

Now I can call him out on it, and try to form a genuine relationship, be it of friends or of lovers.

>>1610607
Hey, the writing's alright. Keep it up and you'll get something good, and the idea is certainly interesting. But you should call him out on it, and take his crit with a pinch assault.

I'd love it if this thread turned out to be one giant troll. It's got everything. Butthurt jealous virgins, white kinight proto-feminists, some yuppie so far up his own ass he's sending emails with pseudo-literary bullshit as animated as spellcast golem, some weirdly retarded dreamscape that everyone's trying to comment on, and the endless dissemination of relationship advice.

10/10

>>1610190
>>1610191

Most faggotry-laden horse shit I've read in a long while.

>Now I can call him out on it, and try to form a genuine relationship, be it of friends or of lovers.

please be troll

>>1610630

Duh. If I wouldn't fuck one troll, I am not going to fuck the original troll. It's ALREADY time to move on.

>>1610607
>I know a couple of you kind of said it before, but neither of you were convincing.

I was convincing, you were just in denial and clearly needed an hour or so to come to terms with the fact that the guy is an obvious dick.

>I lolly-gagged around my friend, Samantha’s, childhood bedroom for an hour

Stopped reading there.
The commas around Samantha's is unnecessary and grammatically incorrect. Go learn how to write. Being a fan of Kurt doesn't make you a writer.

>>1610646

You should have kept reading!

>>1610650
You should have learned how to write!

>>1610661

No school, no teacher. Just doing it. The unnecessary commas are forgivable, I am sure. I am also sure that you are no editor. You should have continued.

WHYYYY are threads like this in /lit/?

no one gives a fuck about two tards who are bored enough to bother with eachother.

Jesus Christ. I prefer the threads about Warhammer 40k novels. At least they have some kind of integrity.

>>1610705

I was going to let sage have it's way with this thread's remains, but there is still meat on its bones, apparently. It has been a lovely meal, but we really must wrap this up.

Would you like your wine in a to-go cup?

I've never seen a writer on /lit/ who is as skilled as I am. It is a daily personal ego boost that never fails to make me smile.

I will thank OP and her male friend for filling in today's slot.

>>1610734
>Filling today's slot
Do ho ho. Contemporary Dickens you are.

jesus, i mean i like KV, but this?

new to /lit/, and I came here initially because I like reading. Now I stay because this shit is way funnier than anything that came out of /b/, with all these snarky assholes acting superior to all these other snarky assholes. I feel like I'm drowning in a sea of kids too hipster to be hipsters, the most pretentious of the pretentious.

Keep on keepin on /lit/

ugh, this is the worst train of bullshit ever

>>1610786

This. Even if anon is subtly trying to asert his own superiority.

This thread is depressing on so many levels. I'm going to vomit now, enjoy your delusion OP.

To answer your original question legitimately, OP: sharing interests/hobbies does not qualify as a basis nor motivator for a relationship. in my own experience, sharing interests has been more of a liability than an asset. you end up competing, with passive aggressive attempts to show superiority of knowledge or skill.

there's no rationalizing attraction. i've had relationships with people where my partner and i had common interests, political views, etc. i've also had great relationships where i've had virtually nothing in common with the other person. those are actually a little exciting. you get to peek into different social circles, learn about a different culture, eat some bomb-ass food (indian, mexican) and when discussion of politics is off the table you can fully enjoy one another's company as a person (and not ideas)

I'd love to fucking the shit out of Lady GaGa.

OP. Kick that guy to the curb. He just wants to fuck. It's obvious, since we now have the source material to compare his critique too.

His critique is an illusion. He offered no concrete criticism but presented in a way that makes it seem important. He was basically flaunting his education (emphasis on "education" since it's not clear that he's actually intelligent).

Lastly, with regards to your piece, it is nice and all but it suffers from one fatal flaw. It is whimsically boring. It made me feel warm and fuzzy for a second, but it offered nothing other than a transient look into a quaint little dinner party during the winter thaw. I can only describe you writing in one way: if your writing was a person it would be the lonely, unmarried, middle-age woman who spends her days crocheting.

>>1610243
>If you first ask yourself "would I fuck her?", there is no respect for the woman to even gain.
You really have no clue about anything within the male mind.
No straight man in human history has ever met, glanced at, or even heard of any woman without first asking himself that question.

>>1611628
This is fairly true. Even if it remains subconscious, this is the primary question.

>>1611628

Haha. Oh wow great generalization. The first thing I think of when I see a girl is, "I wonder what she thinks about Proust?" or, "I wonder if she believes in true love?"...lol just kidding. I mainly think about whether she'll still be a good fuck after I dismember her in my basement.

You have a question?

>>1611642
>The first thing I think of when I see a girl is, "I wonder what she thinks about Proust?" or, "I wonder if she believes in true love?"
These are merely manifestations of the Wille zum Leben.

>>1610299

killitwithfire.jpg

>>1611628
I don't ask the question "would i fuck her", but i routinely do some sort of subconscious appraisal of physical attractiveness. Nothing nitpicky either, it's just sort of a "Hey, she looks pretty good." or "That girl is hot." This has no bearing on my judgment of her character/personality/beliefs, should I ever make one.

>>1611628
Is that seriously how it is? So, I will never find a man who isn't constantly trying to fuck some other woman in his mind? That's rather depressing.

>>1611721
There is nothing depressing about the continuation of life and our species.

>>1611737
I'm just talking about on a relationship between two people level. It's depressing that there are apparently no faithful men, if what you said is true.

>>1611737

U shore baut dat buddy?

>>1611744

A faithful man would be the one that fucks other women only in his mind.

>>1611744

Most men remain faithful, but if your idea of faithfulness extends to a man's thoughts then you have some issues.

>>1611757
To me, that still counts as unfaithful. If you are pretending to have sex with other people while you're having sex with someone you claim to actually love, that's pretty much the ultimate 'fuck you.' If you can't stand to look at them or think about them, why be with them? At that point, you're probably just forcing yourself to be with that person and both people are going to be miserable. But then, this is probably why my relationships don't work. I have way too lofty expectations. Oh well.

>You didn't use the dreaded semicolon, awkward colon, or killitwithfuckingfire hyphen. Well played, milady. Those blackguards will verily wreck some prose the hell up.

what.
That's like saying "you didn't use grace notes, slurs, or tuplets."

>>1611744

uh. Get over it?

Honestly you probably have a stunted libido. Women do it too.

>>1611780
I might. Because during all my (two) relationships, I only had sex with the person I was with. I also only /wanted/ to have sex with the person I was with. Other people and their sexual characteristics and habits didn't concern me at all. Maybe I'm just ridiculously monogamous. But there has to be someone else out there are monogamous as me, I'm hoping.

>>1611801
read a biology book

>>1611801

Yeah, the folks that go live in a monastery are as monogamous as you.

>>1611801

when you're in a relationship you never think to yourself "oh damn I wonder what he looks like naked?" You never watch porn? You never masturbate to thoughts of being raped by Herman Melvilleas an ocelot?

>>1611801

I'm very monogamous. I'm so monogamous I've been single for 7 years.

>>1611801
My impression is that most people are naturally, easily monogamous when they're in a serious relationship, in the only-wanting-and-only-really-even-thinking-about-fucking-the-person-they're-with-way. But the opposite is true when single- they may not, even probably will not, carry it out at all, but they're in a weak, basically meaningless way hot for everyone slightly good-looking that passes by. I'm certainly that way.

Also, fuck yeah, hyphens!

You idiots are oversimplifying shit. It's not everyone you meet you evaluate, but to pretend like you never have your head turned when in a relationship is kinda dumb. Sometimes you'll just meet people you'll think of as potential mates due to the Will to Life.

>>1611853
Then why even be in relationships, if everyone is always going to want to fuck other people?

Monogamy is an invention used by patriarchal societies in order to reduce uncertainty of political successors. IE: the king has a wife. Before the age of DNA testing, monogamy was the only means of being certain that the son (successor) is really his father's son.

I'm aware that many other mammals have partners for life. I don't think it's been unequivocally whether or not humans are inherently monogamous, but history and contemporary statistics show otherwise. Dan Savage had a great column about finding other people attractive while in a relationship.

>>1611868
Because you believe that person (or at least the Will to Life tells you) that they are the most appropriate person for you.

If anyone will do, why do people split up, cheat etc?

What we know about you:
>You'd rather promote other people's ideas.
>You're verbose to prove to people you're smart.
>I won't be reading your book.