/lit/ - Literature

Making music playlists for characters that exist in my head. Feeling conflicted about it, cause its good fun, and I can tell myself that its useful, that I'm defining the story's mood, establishing these character traits in my brain before I write them for real. I'm probably just making excuses though. The playlists are good fun, that's why they're a good distraction.

I haven't written anything in about two weeks. I sit at my computer but I can't focus. The last time I wrote, it was only after I spent my day in some sort of fugue. At work I felt like I was having an out of body experience. My feet didn't move, I glided over the room. My hands would rise up to open a door and I'd pay special attention to them, like they weren't mine. Occasionally I would feel this intense jolt of sadness and I couldn't tell you where it was coming from. I talked to my friends and felt like I wasn't really on anyone's wavelength.

It was a really lonely feeling. But I wrote effortlessly that night. I never write effortlessly, and I'm bad at self discipline. That isolated, scary, out-of-body feeling hasn't come back, and I'm probably happier and more comfortable day to day, but come night time I'm up at 3 in the morning wishing I could bring it back and write again without forcing myself.

Western philosophy is rooted on axioms, Chinese philosophy is rooted on humanism and Indian philosophy is rooted on observation. I can't focus on a single one because I'm afraid that I'll miss out on things.

Last night when I was high and drunk I mentally came up with the entire solution to a functionality problem I was having in a programming assignment. I told myself I would wake up early and implement it.
This morning I woke up early and implemented it.
Its flawless.
Weed makes you smarter.

>>18736481
you must be in the honeymoon period

Can someone help me out with a formatting quesiton? I'm kind of retarded.
If I write in an essay,
>The BigRed is defined by the words that make up its name. The "Big," comes from it being large. The "Red," comes from the object being the color red.
If I'm explaining something like that do I put those words in quotation marks or do I leave the quotation marks out?
Another one for example
>They use the word "remove" in their job rather than "kill" to dehumanize the enemy.
Keep the quotation marks or trash them?

>>18736248
You are going to miss everything that you don't focus right now. That is how you deal with it.

>>18736523
of? weed smoking? not a chance. 5 years in. Ive been in the degenerate period for years now.

>>18736481
Yesterday at work a pajeet made a bad merge commit and destroyed the entire development build. Now he's nowhere to be seen and seems to have quit in shame having accomplished nothing but leave a smoldering pile of shit.
Don't get into programming.

So I always thought I was really ugly, but the other day I was on break with a bunch of coworkers, and everyone was rating each other for as like a "fun" thing...and this hot guy that I like said I was slightly above average! I had this huge wave of good feelings wash over me and I have been riding that high for like a week now. I'm a girl btw if that matters.

>>18736550
he went home and committed hairycurry

>>18736537
That is because you are not just smoking weed and whatever. The main problem with it is that most people end up abusing and being stoned all the time, but depending on how you consume it, as in before sleep and in the right amount, it is fucking great. I don't smoke anymore, because I don't really have any control, but I remember sleeping really well back when I smoked before sleeping.

Fit and lit really isn't the most based combination.
Artlit is.

>>18736572
no, it's all three.

>>18736639
fartlit

>>18736481
The only friend I have ever had seem pretty depressed and fixed on seeing me after years of not seeing each other. To this day I still don't understand why he was so kind and friendly to me back then. Throughout my life I have managed to form some acquaintances. Always, after talking a few times, people always start talking to me about very private matters and feelings. I think all of them realize that I am very lonely and that therefore I will never tell anyone what they tell me. The people of my country are way too gossipy. They still always stop talking to me after telling me all these feelings, Shame I guess.
I have changed now, but I can't but hope to reconnect with my friend. I'm tired of being alone all the time.

>>18736682
I hope you get your friend back anon

>>18736187
I sit in my government mandated quarantine. My mom just cooked me some eggs, my mom is not a very good cook, didnt even salt and pepper, just cracked some eggs in a pan and overcooked them. I hate Canada.

>>18736713
cook you're own damn eggs you ingrate

>>18736713
Bro where tf are you? how is it still lockdown?
I'm in MTL and everything is pretty much back to normal aside from masks.
also why didnt you just make your own eggs

>>18736720
I can't leave the room I am in because I am forced to quarantine for 14 days by my retarded government ( and take 2 tests during those two weeks )

I wish i'd die in my sleep tonight. This world is not for me.

>>18736713
Canada, blessed land.

>>18736732
Why? What happened?

>>18736744
My life happened. Its just a mental misery.

>>18736751
I feel you, brother
but I choose to trudge on, because I must

>>18736731
lmfao did the gubmint set up a camera outside your bedroom? just, like, walk to the fucking kitchen retard

>>18736187
I hide in a shell. It's a shell i have made, just like my problems. Why do i hurt myself constantly. I desire to live in another shell, blue is not my color. So many would kill to be blue but i still think about it constantly. It has consumed my life. In the back of my head, in the lonely projection room a constant reel plays of a future i desire. It's something that is achievable but not. My shell is large and unlike any pink one i have seen. I believe in no god yet i still ask them why. There is no answer because yet again i can not blame this on genetics or science or god or anyone, it's a matter of will. I used to think i didn't repress my desires at all and was fairly mixed between blue and pink but as i look around at my small life everything you could point at and pick up would be blue. If you break them apart there insides are still blue. Break me open please, do I too bleed blue?

>>18736758
Perhaps you see something good about it.

>>18736856
I see life as what it is, temporary

>>18736526
keep them

I hate old people

>>18736818
Look they actually do send people out to check on you and they also do random calls. Shit is a police state and I am on the naughty list because I refused to comply with the mandatory 3 day quarantine hotel stay, had to sign a non compliance form stating that I understood I could be fined up to 750k.

>>18736860
True, its temporary. But that adds up even more anger at yourself when you're unable to enjoy it

>>18736187
Cute!

>>18736889
in the end, it's all about perspective
I choose to enjoy my limited time on this plane of existence
absorbing the absurdity of it all

>>18736885
why not just spend 3 days in a hotel rather than 14 in your room, You sound like an ungrateful retard

>>18736898
>why not just spend 3 days in a hotel rather than 14 in your room, You sound like an ungrateful retard
YOU HAVE TO SPEND 14 DAYS REGARDLESS. It's 3 days in a hotel where you pay $1000 because the government has allowed the hotels to price gouge. Then once you get your first test result ( which I took ) after 3 days THEN you are allowed to go to your home to quarantine. You also take a test on day 8, and even if that one is negative too you stay home until 2 weeks is up total.
You put way too much faith in the Canadian government not being retarded.

>>18736911
Damn, that shit is straight out of a dystopian novel.

>>18736891
Who is she?

>>18736897
Maybe im too dumb for absurdism. I get the idea but it doesnt really click with me personally despite reading his material over and over again.

>>18736981
I don't get anything really
life's too short for that, I just choose to be happy

>>18736985
were you always happy?

>>18737007
Not really, childhood was a bumpy ride, parents and divorce, the typical, what followed was a very long period of depression and suicidal thoughts, then one day I think I just chose to be happy as weird as that sounds

>>18736836
Do I... Actually feel bad for a trans person? Whats wrong with me? Sorry anon

>>18736911
>>18736938
It used to be 28 days, which has no scientific merit whatsoever.

>>18737022
I guess im you before choosing to be happy. Was there a single catalyst or just a regular day?

>>18737050
it was a lot of introspection and meditation during that period of depression, trying to come to terms with my life and what reality means to me
why I want to kill myself and what I am really after by craving death, and what it really means to die.

>>18737022
I honestly think that being happy is retarded and cringe-tier. It requires turning your brain off and being a boring, passive loser who weirds out intelligent people. Happiness is for household pets, human men are meant to suffer. The best you can do is just get better at suffering.

>>18737074
Two questions
>how long have you been "happy" for?
>do you actually have any answers to those questions you asked yourself?

>>18737084
I've been happy for a decade and a little bit now
as for answers, yeah I do have them, but they're not something concrete, they feel more like an emotion, or a line of thought, doubt they'd be meaningful for you, I reached them using my own experience and my way of thinking, my memories and my love for the people around me and were around me before.

>>18737074
Maybe i just suck at introspection. I remember having a thought that i might learn something terrible or realize that my situation is objectively bad. I guess i could say that my deathwish i fueled by anger towards everything.

>>18736836
You will bleed with propaganda and delusions, and with that out will come a harsh realisation, in your last moments you will understand you have been ruined by people who never knew you and used you as a pawn to further their malicious goals.

>>18736187
Twinks.

>>18737076
>tfw to intelligent

I spend way too much time just thinking, usually about the same things. I need to get out of my head and live life some.

>>18737142
You know whats even worse, i knew about the trans stuff before i even came into contact with the internet, i didn't even have a name for it, I used to live in rural Australia with no outside knowledge. It was a town of 50 people. Granted after we moved when i was 16 and i got to use the internet it sure didn't help but I realized thats what i am, and how screwed i am

>>18737153
yes

Repost but I still can't stop thinking about sex meanwhile I know I won't get to have it for the foreseeable future. How can I stop?

>>18737171
get into your body more, do you play any sports? if not, try tennis or something

>>18736187
I sauntered up gradually to the counter of my local Barnes and Noble. In line stood an exasperated looking single mother with her mulatto offspring screeching and stirring around her. I pitied her, not just for the hellish life she had brought upon herself by spawning those half-negro bastards but for the visible wear that a fast life of sex and drugs had done to her face. She must have been about 30 years but had the appearance of a woman much her senior. I shot a dirty glance her way, making it clear the mistakes of her life were visible to even those she hadn't known, and cut past her in line. Distracted by those petit bastards, she neglected to protest.

I approached the counter and dropped my purchases on the counter with a loud thud, startling the bored teenage clerk with her headphones in. She was short, with dark hair and eyes, clearly fresh out of schooling and starting her illustrious career as a cashier. I opened: "Como estas, mucho gusto, Este es una tienda bueno". She looked at me confounded. "Oh I apologize, you don't speak your ancestral language? A pity, really, I am fluent in Latin as well much like my virile Italian warrior patrimony. Chusae a-ae mashae."

She had no words, perhaps intimidated by my trilinguality in reflection of her own monolinguality. The cashier looked down at my books and her face became as flushed as that caramel skin could. "MEIN KAMPH" read the title, in large print Gothic script. She glanced upwards at me briefly before averting her eyes, overwhelmed by my masculine energy gained via my monastic process of semen retention. "I like underdog stories", I said firmly without breaking my gaze.

She bagged the book and moved on to the next. "Lo-lee-tah", she verbalized with the pedantic nature of someone who should not be employed in a palace of letters such as Barnes and Noble. "That one's about a pedophile", I uttered, still not breaking my gaze. I leaned in close to her face, pockmarked from teenage acne that hadn't quite the time to heal, "I have quite of florigellium of those".

>>18737269
you can start by going to the advice board instead of asking for it here

>>18737328
She bagged the book without a response. Before she stated the price I cut her off with a scoff. "It does not matter the price, I can afford it". We stood there in silence for a few moments, my gaze still firmly fixed on her eyes. Such is a power move, women demand to be dominated and I was doing thusly, without even a word, I could tell by her nervous disposition that I was striking quite a chord.

"So are you single?"
"W-what?"
"Do you have a boyfriend"
"Um, yes..."
"What's his name?"
"Um..."

I cut her off there. "If you can't remember his name with sufficient rapidity to save yourself the bother of delaying with your 'ums', he must not be that important". She had no response, looking around as if someone was going to save her from my raw masculinity. "Give me your number", I demanded.

"Um.."

"Stop with your 'ums' and speak clearly, your servile disposition is very unattractive"

"305..."

I interjected before she could say more. "Are you a Dolphins fan?"
"Yeah I guess"
I informed her, "sports are for fags" and grabbed my new books without paying. Once again she did not protest, as the single mother approached the counter to purchase whatever dime store romantic trash she was going to fill her post-wall afternoons with now that she wasn't pretty enough to get the drugs for free. I exited my building and approached the vehicle where my bitch cheuffeuse of a mother was in wait.

"Did you find anything good, pumpkin?" She inquired with the good natured yet off putting simplicity of a provincial housewife. "No mommy, I guess I'll have to use my Good Boy Points somewhere else, can we go to Wendy's instead?"

She frowned and let out a sigh, hoping I would take pity on her after a long day of work at the factory and release her from her motherly duties. It is always the dream of peasants to live life as an aristocrat like myself, but without the labor of the peasantry, whom'st would provide an aristocrat such as I with chicken tendies from Wendy's? Besides, if given a life of leisure such as mine they would certainly squander it on frivolities. The stupid whore couldn't even decipher that I had two new books clenched against me, despite not using her useless Fiat currency to purchase them.

My chauffeuse started up my chariot and we ventured onwards. "WENDYS TENDIES WENDIES TENDIES" I began to chant from the rear of the vehicle, with the force of a thousand waves crashing on some impoverished Pacific village. This was life and I was living it.

>>18737328
kek

>>18737338
kek
why does reading uncomfortable girls turn me on so much

>>18737338
you're my hero

>>18737338
if only i could be half as based as this.
>This was life and I was living it.
indeed

>>18737362
Because that's just the natural state of girls dealing with a man who acts based (and therefore a man they are likely to want to fuck)

>>18737328
> I shot a dirty glance her way, making it clear the mistakes of her life were visible to even those she hadn't known, and cut past her in line. Distracted by those petit bastards, she neglected to protest.
delightful

>>18737338
The autism is too strong.

>>18737346
>>18737362
>>18737374
>>18737381
>>18737390
>>18737395

Thanks bros, I've never done any creative writing outside of high school.

>>18737441
Make your story into a novel, I'd read it.

P.S pls somebody notice the Latin is Pig Latin

>>18737328
>>18737338
it's something alright

>>18737474
very clever anon

What, fundamentally, is action?
There are physical acts, mental acts, and when there is Divine Intervention, God acts.
It is motion.
The laws of motion of physical bodies apply only for the sake of the laws of motion of minds. They dovetail in the brain.
Oh, holy temple, dwelling place of Spirit.
Specific patterns of electrochemical signals enable the performance of associated mental patterns.
If you think of an apple, there is a pathway for that. If you think of a woman, there is a pathway for that.
All the time, you experience freedom of both thought and will. You can do whatever you want to.
Deterministic theories of consciousness which presuppose that you are a consequence of biological laws, are clearly missing the point.
The fact is that you are real and you do decide what happens next. You can change the course of your life this very second. Or maybe you like things the way they are... Whatever you decide, it's up to you.

>>18736885
but.. you're in your house? I fail to understand what keeps you from going to your kitchen

>>18737328
>I sauntered up gradually to the counter
bad prose, stopped reading

>>18737152
<3

IN THE LAND OF TWILIGHT UNDER THE MOON
WE DANCE FOOOOOOR THE IDIOOOOOTS
RING AROUND THE ROSES- JUMP TO THE MOON
WE SING WITH THE CASTANEEEEEETS

Today's my 22nd birthday.
I'm going to go to a bar with some friends tonight and maybe have them over at my place afterwards.
I'm also meeting a girl I know somewhat well for sex. It always feels good in the moment though leaves a certain weird feeling in me, probably because I know it's just me satisfying unnecessary carnal pleasures. At least she's hot though
Dinner with family tomorrow night. Should be fun, hope you anons are doing well

>>18737620
Unfathomably Based

>>18737644
Based .hackChad

I got drunk with some of my coworkers the other night and started rambling about Jesus. I'm hoping they don't talk about it at work

>>18737667
what did you start rambling about

I just woke up and had some odd dreams.
In my dream my friend (I have none) was a leech and I let them attach themselves to me but I was not totally sure they were a leech and I was eating these grubs also.
I was in some building like a college dorm I guess and walked past my friends room and looked in but could not see her and assumed she was a leech on me and I just had to wait for her to take human form.
The entire place was lit blue from artificial lights and i walked into this room with half walls and then to my dismay it was a girls bathroom. I said to the girls I was with "i'm sorry I did not notice" and they said it was fine and this one chubby girl said we needed to talk more.
She said that she also tried to keep 38kg-20kg or she will become fat.
She asked me about my friend and I said she was a leech on me at least I think she is and then this man appeared and started beatboxxing casually but soon it became insanely glitch noise beatboxxing and I was amazed he could make such amazing sounds.

How to escape the system is homesteading is an impracticality?

>>18737498
very dumb take

>>18737622
>It always feels good in the moment though leaves a certain weird feeling in me, probably because I know it's just me satisfying unnecessary carnal pleasures
Disgusting whore

>>18737684
Jesus

>>18737704
Yes

>>18737022
Literally me.

>>18737328
>>18737338
This is incredible! I laughed loudly, good job!

>>18737269
you don't I don't even fap anymore and i started waking up covered in jizz again my body is screaming for sex it will never stop aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

>>18737727
sour grapes

>>18737022
>I just chose to be happy
i feel like im too cynical and sarcastic for that

>>18737050
At some point it felt like I had suffered an entire lifetimes worth and I just decided to not suffer anymore. I decided the era of suffering is over. And anyone that brought me suffering got ejected out of my life immediately. Getting rid of any toxic relationship the moment it is identified as one.
I never lost the ability to feel awe when looking at nature. There is tremendous beauty all around us every day. We just need the eyes to see it.

Also getting into lifting weights was the single most positive thing I ever did to myself besides getting into reading. Its all about your human capital and refining your unique character.

Use your sense of wonder like a compass, let it guide you, if you do this long enough you will encounter more and more miraculous situations.

>>18737811
Hope you have a shit birthday

>>18737813
You can always stop being "cynical and sarcastic", shit is lame af.

>>18737851
a complete 180 just like that?

>>18737811
not everyone wants to be a whore like yourself, there's a reason it makes you feel bad

>>18737854
Yes.

>>18737854
Make a conscious effort to be sincere and optimistic, I know it's hard but psychedelics help if you dont mind doing drugs.

>>18737854
why are you cynical and sarcastic? once you realize that you can do as you please, for some it doesn't even take that level of understanding just a conscious effort.

>>18737869
Psychedelics just make people think good and evil dont exist and 'everything is one' and relative

>>18737848
>>18737861
The one who said sour grapes wasn’t me though
And I wouldn’t really say it makes me feel bad since we enjoy our time together even without sex

>>18737888
Sure they did that to me too but it's wearing off now that I found Jesus.

>>18737875
i've been seeing the world as an unforgiving and harsh place who just tramples you as soon as possible. it's been like that for atleast 20 years.

>>18737441
>>18737441
Many audible keks were discharged. I could read this kind of shit for days.

There are two kinds of truths: the first is for all, the second only for oneself. To the first kind belongs 2+2=4, to the second All people are your brothers and sisters. The first kind of truth is called truth, the second faith.

Why are people selling 'courses' left and right now?

>>18737951
because only thing you can do with your "education" is teach otherwise it's all a hoax

>>18737933
there is only one truth, that there is no god but God and Muhammad is the messanger of god

I want to be honest with myself regardless of other's opinions, but I fear ending up alone or disliked by doing so.

>>18737989
do you not want to be free? love yourself from within and watch the chains break away

The same people saying covid super deadly are telling me the climate will kill us any day now. ... Remember when it was called global warming? Now its climate change. Always interesting when they change the wording. Psyops all of it. My 2cents. Mazlow hierachy of needs taught them that if you keep the masses in constant fear about tomorrow they dont think longterm and will consoom moar today.

I'm job hunting right now and I can't shake the feeling of being disingenuous for asking one of my friends to ask if they have an opening at their workplace. I don't like asking people out of the blue like this nor do I like it when others do it to me. I don't want them to think I'm just trying to use them.

>>18738010
I understand the feeling, I'm also a very honest person with a fear of putting on an act like that. I think the thing to do is to simply ask, don't put on a whole "hey man I miss you so much have you been! Anyway there's this thing...", just say what you mean without any extra weight on it.

you guys I have a confesion I am only a lit and philosopy guy because I discovered I am too dumb for physics desu

pic unrelated

>>18738071
What? I've been a STEMfag for most of my life because philosophy scared my ass away, science is so much easier to wrap your head around IMO.

I just realised how much I hate everyone hahaha

>>18738118
I love you anon

>>18736187
I have a lot of trouble following through on things. I always end up starting projects and never finishing them. I've been working a lot on trying to push past it this summer, but not with much success. What can I do to help with this?

>>18738010
Your friend won't care, it's a very normal thing to ask

>>18738006
You're a dumb bitch

>>18738124
Don't work in your room/house.

>>18737888
If "everything is one" then nothing can be relative

>>18738134
That's you, buddy.

I don't get my aversion to sobriety. Every now and then, for a few days, like now, I am sober. And then it all gets too much. The sensations. The world. Too overwhelming. Better to be dull and miserable.

Who's the best lookalike?

Looking in the mirror makes me want to rip off my head and slam it onto the the ground.

>>18738149
>Better to be dull and miserable
The way you type makes it seem like you don't really believe that.

>>18738153
I'm not gay, but something about chubby round-faced grandpas with all-white hair does things to me

>>18738144
I'm not your buddy, pal

>tfw dumb and ugly

>>18738165
The papa smoke effect

>>18738165
I know what you mean. I used to have fantasies about Santa Claus.

>>18738079
you sound like someone who never had to solve a greeen's function it still have nightmares

>>18738188
PAPA SMOKE

>>18738118
what about women? they are so cute i can't stop loving them even when they reject me

>>18738188
god i just wanna bury my face in that chest hair hnnnnnnnggggggggggggggg just imagine how warm and cuddly he is FUUCCKKKKKK

>>18738160
It is better to be in a pit waiting to get out than to navigate in an uncertain forest. Why should I even try for the latter? It's all going to be over soon enough. What are the few decades of my life compared to all of the time? How much less insignificant could a legacy really be than of a drunkard?

Maybe I don't believe in all of what I typed above. Maybe that is why I don't get my aversion to sobriety.

ne kimi no koto boku no koto sore wa watashi no koto

>>18738214
ね 君のこと 僕のこと それわ 私のこと

>>18736563
kek

>>18738203
What's not to get? Being drunk and high feels good, most of the time. Making it into this dark and gloomy thing, a pit of despair or whatever, makes you sound like a total douche. Save it for your future AA meetings.

>>18738223
他の誰も知らない
あなたが知っている

>>18738238
僕らの物語
知らないきみのこと

stop with the moonrunes this is a proper christian, anglo-saxon board no orientals allowed

Thank God for Tea.

love this song
https://youtu.be/dy90tA3TT1c

>>18738255
日本語喋らないじゃん

>>18738255
ᛁ ᛚᚩᚠᛖ ᛁᚩᚢ ᛏᚩᚩ ᚪᚾᚩᚾ

>>18738255
>他只看得懂一個語言

Anyone else doesn't get lonely? I'm starting to wonder if there's something wrong with me.

>>18738255
ケク

>>18738296
I don't really get lonely as much as I need external stimulation
I can occupy myself with my thoughts, but that only works for so long before I require external input to test my theories or challenge my views

先日僕の妹はシャワー出て来て、パンツだけ着て。。。かわいいいな~

>>18738310
ベースド

enough with that silly ching chang chong talk speak engilsh I can't understand you clayton bigsby

>>18738306
You don't crave human interaction?

>>18738321
isn't that human interaction?

>>18738321
I do

>>18738318
どこかの誰かと寝ちゃえば良いのよ

Staying alive is the true bad karma.

>>18738329
External stimulation can mean other things
>>18738331
Then we're not in the same boat. I've been basically isolated for 3 years, yet I can't remember a time I've felt the need to talk to someone for the simple sake of talking.

>>18738352
So why don't you kill yourself?

>>18738354
I need new materials basically
I actually talk to myself a lot

>>18738318
I'll translate for you:

>>18738214
>>18738223
>>18738238
>>18738246
These don't really mean anything. It's basically just "it's me, it's you, I don't know you, this is our story". It's sort of nonsense.
>>18738285
This says "You don't speak Japanese"
>>18738310
This says "a few days ago my little sister came out of the shower, only wearing underwear... so cute!"
>>18738317
this says "based"
>>18738335
This says "you should sleep with someone anywhere"

>>18738369
>I actually talk to myself a lot
I actually do this too sometimes. Mostly to not lose the ability to speak.

>>18738378
yeah, I use it to practice lateral thinking
jumping from subject to subject, helps keep the mind flexible

>>18738378
You don't sing? Like ever?

>>18738382
I think I sing more than I talk. Why do you ask?

>>18738369
maybe im going to sound crazy but i experience myself as "we" there are 2 of me and my inner monologue is a dialogue between us

>>18738399
anon, you don't sound crazy, you are crazy
I don't mind though

>>18738398
Just asking. That is also a thing with me, I definitely sing more than I talk now that I'm living alone.

Huh...
the fact that we're all basically doing the same thing makes me think we're either the same kind of people, or our actions are just how humans cope with loneliness

>>18738399
That sounds based, I don't have an "I" monologue or anything. My things are all in terms of ideas whirling and pumping out from whatever they are supposed to come from to my fingers or speech. I have a hard time thinking sounds, I'm getting better at it now that I'm reading epic poetry.

Good thing I have a /lit/ older brother to discuss philosophy with all day.

>>18738214
うおおおお!!!扇ちゃん!!!かわいいだ!かわいいいいい!!!

>>18738415
I don't think I'm crazy. I've just personalized some part of myself. He is distinctly separate from me but is also me, it's a hard thing to explain. I'd have to think quite deeply about it to give a proper explanation and it's something I try not to analyze mostly because I like his presence.

>>18738372
>This says "a few days ago my little sister came out of the shower, only wearing underwear... so cute!"
why do these thing never happen to me

I just signed up for an online AP English lit class and I'm so nervous about having to share my thoughts in a public space with my name attached. I didn't really do school, I'm a hs dropout and even while enrolled I barely showed up. I want to improve my reading beyond a surface level and be able to better express myself in discussion but I'm so anxious that just signing up has me worrying if I'll even make it through an introductory class.

I'm not worried about the coursework, just having people critique my work.

Humanity is alone as far we can tell. No signs of intelligent life out there.
People use the law of large numbers to justify their existence, as in if given a large amount of instances then unlikely events do tend to occur. But the law of large numbers truly tells us only that with a large enough sample size it is an accurate measurement of the general statistic.
So, therefore, human beings are unlikely. We already knew that.

But chance miracles don't occur against all odds in nature. I mean yes, in statistical mechanics it is possible a system could temporarily defy entropy, but the odds are minute. It is possible that due to random neuronal firing you could hear the complete works of mozart, but once again the odds are miniscule.
Probabilistic truths have sturdy foundation, in that what is probably true actually is so, and improbable things are not the generalization.

Then we have us, a statistical anomaly.
One in 60 quintillion planets perhaps, and just one example. (Yes there are some estimates that there is only a 1% chance intelligent life will arise given the entire domain of the universe at any given time).
But we conveniently draw the line on the hypothetical odds, so as not to become implausible. Just the right amount of planets have appeared so that we had a legitimate chance. Right?

>>18738296
I don't but I think it's the animist culture (something is near you, even if it's only ghosts or objects and not living things)

Do people seriously enjoy feet? I thought it was a meme

>>18738792
It will never matter whether there are intelligent life forms out there or not, because we'll never actually get to meet them even if they were real. It's the kind of distance no amount of scientific advancement could conquer.

>>18736248
where did you get this?

>>18738800
Not sure I follow. Unless you meant internet/media having a numbing effect on one's sense of loneliness. It's something I've considered.

>>18738827
I think some do. I have a feet folder on my pc, but that is mainly because I felt like learning how to draw them. Got a hand folder too.

>>18738921
anon, it's time to come to terms with your fetish

>>18738921
>>18738952
>>18738827
Body Part fetishes
Face > Legs > Hands > Tummy > Armpits > Butt > Feet > Neck > Tits

>>18738952
Some feet are beautiful, but they don't turn me on like with other people. If anything it is movement, this is definitely underestimated. The way some people move, drives me fucking nuts. Although I'm a fucking terrible dancer, I'm ironically attracted to the most gracious ladies who are amazing dancers. I call it the universe playing with me, but whatever, I don't care. Not really worried about it.

>>18739083
And I'm not even talking about someone dancing. This goes from the way they move their face when they are smiling, getting mad, thinking to the way they move their whole body as they walk. This is something that is hard to find, but I'm very attracted to this kind of thing in a visceral level.

I'm ugly and I'm proud

>>18739083
>>18739098
>kinophilia
Based

>>18737727
this.

>>18737909
>>18739142
Pride in looks is no good my brother. I am ugly too but I'm trying to be indifferent instead of hating myself or having some weird narcissistic attitude toward my face.

it's midnight and I just blasted some stupid commie memes through my laptop speakers with windows open not realizing that other students from my dorm are most likely hearing all of this. I sincerely hope they don't know where it came from.

>>18739274
seize my mains of cum production daddy

>>18738906
Animism is the name for religions where basically everything has a spirit/magic. Being alone doesn't really happen in those religions. In religions with fewer gods, it's easier to be alone.

>>18736970
https://www.instagram.com/theanastasiah/

olol you're relying on me to make things not awkward for you. you're making your own choices in life buddy, i'm already out there saying it's a bad idea, i'm not saying it's a good idea so we both go down together. you are doing some dumb shit and i'm not helping.

>>18736187
will be a father soon. also bought a house recently in a great neighborhood, some of the best schools in the country.

im so anxious about being able to afford it all, especially with one job so i have time to be in my kids life. im trying to learn computer programming but im always so exhausted from my current 9-5. if i do excellent in my current 9-5 my career will take off, six figure salary, six-seven figures in shares at my company.

my health is getting wrecked. gained 25 pounds, addicted to junk food almost. procrastination kills me. i havent read in forever.

>>18739242
>Pride in looks is no good my brother. I am ugly too but I'm trying to be indifferent instead of hating myself or having some weird narcissistic attitude toward my face.

>>18739437
based dad-to-be. hang in there

>>18736885
You are in your fucking house. Just go to your kitchen. I did "quarantine" like 3-4 times now, no one cares even if you leave or meet people.

can't bring myself to read new books lately and I can't go back and read old favorites because I last read all of them in the presence of my ex

>>18736187
i decided that i am irredeemably fucking stupid today

>>18737888
And what is bad about that?

>>18737888
nah they mainly just made me enjoy being around other people for once. but then I got really depressed afterwords. sort of a one time fix.

4 more hours until I can eat food.

I was about write horror-comedy regarding myself inseminating Butterfly, but why bother?

why cant a nigga get his prostate blasted without everyne being weird about it? like im not into femdom or any gay shit but its there for a reason you know

>>18740152

>>18740256
case and point. douche bag

>>18736555
you know the rules, tits or gtfo

I wonder if I should split my exercise routine. The good feels only last about two hours. I don't care about muscle, I just don't want to feel bad

>>18740462
if you have a homegym go for it

>>18736187
There is a lot of things on my mind, and it all boils down to one thing: None of it could have happened, but I chose to make it happen.

Life is truly what you make of it. Inaction is a choice, just like action.

i think i was molested as a kid. it would explain alot

>>18739437
How old are you? Having kids is amazing!

Get a rocking chair :)

Just another day writin' and creatin'. Tomorrow it's back to work and I'm sitting here trying to catalogue my old stuff for what basically amounts to an exhibition nobody will see.
That's cool though. We're makin' efforts.

I think Butterfly waits for me to post for her to post:3

>>18740526
my mother told me I was molested, but I can't remember anything

its that time of the day again.
it is time for me to smoke weed.

>>18736187
I want to die.

Seriously.
I don't want to kill myself, because a suicide would crush everyone around me, and we already had one. But I wish that an accident happens someday which kills me.

Why? I don't like how I live, and I don't think I can make it different despite my best efforts. Everything is only becoming worse, and only now I come to realize I passed the point of no return somewhere in the past, four or five years ago.

>>18740777
what happened 4-5 years ago

>>18740735
I'm the opposite. I remember it but I have no way to validate it and no one knows

>>18740777
Join the Patriot Front

To the /lit/let anon who asked who that booktuber was. That would be based *e m m i e *. Your superior and master from now on. She will be responsible for turning /lit/lets into a en/lit/en'd anons.

There is no escape from this reality. I can keep chiseling away at it with my thoughts but I will see nothing but an infinite mantle of stone cold incomprehensibility before me. The only true truth is experience. Too much thought, like too much of any good thing, is an infestation.

>>18740543
Will you have printed copies?

Cant decide what haircut to get.

>>18740777
What happened?

>>18740866
My books on amazon are available in paperback form. Everything else is canvas paintings and little knicknacks I've made over the years. I picked the best of (they really aren't that great but I did make them) and hope they impress.
Even if people find my work lame it's kinda nice to showcase it instead of keeping it hidden away in the shadows forever. Ya never know. Artists are their own biggest critics.

Is thought a good thing though? Other animals get along perfectly fine without thought. By thought I mean a certain arbitrary reflection on possibilities not immediately tied to one's organismic self-preservation. I am perfectly in light with the attitude that thinking is an affliction, often a necessary one, but someone who thinks compulsively has overridden the true purpose of their cognitive faculties I'm reminded of Norweigian philosopher Peter Wessel Zapffe's notion of the "tragic animal." Man is like the deer whose antlers cannot stop growing, and which do not stop growing and end up tipping its head over. In a similar way too much consciousness is a burden.

Cognition not tied to purely pragmatic ends, where has it got us? What if humankind thought nothing of bringing its material needs closer to it? Why consider all these excess possibilities outside the cone of survivalistic necessity? In this exception of animal law, humankind has betrayed all other species. This was our original sin. Consciousness was our fall from eden.

>>18740937
How much money do you make per paperback sold?

>>18740960
About two to three bucks. Which feels kinda bad since my paperbacks cost 12 to 14 dollars. I tried to make them as cheap as I could to match the ebook price so I wouldn't be jipping people, but that's as low as Amazon will let me go.
So you figure five books out, if someone spends 60 bucks to buy the set I get ~20 bucks.
Ebooks is a lot more reasonable. I sell them for 3 bucks, I get 2 bucks. Yay.
Honestly I wish I could make them cheaper because I sell my books in parts, but it is what it is.

>>18737622
Updating my blogpost in the blogposting thread:
No sex happened but instead we had a God-approved makeout while watching TV, which I'm in favor of.
Bar with friends was fun although I was late by almost a half hour which I feel shitty about
Dinner still on tomorrow. Take care blogpost anons.
>>18740762
I've felt a surprising lack of desire to smoke weed these past few weeks. Hopefully this means that I'm growing out of it.

>>18741029
To add on to that this is why I also want to do audible books but ~I~Don't~Have~A~Voice~ (and even if I could I can't play female characters) and I'm shit at getting my name out.
Numbers get retarded real fast if I actually did get my name out there. 1 person is 20 bucks right? 1,000 people? ...yeah. I mean I worked hard on everything so I'd be happy but that's very intimidating. That is a lot of eyeballs.

>>18741029
Do you have any paperbacks printed with you right now?

I print my own paperbacks and have been able to get the cost down to $1 per book. I intend to sell them at $25 a copy, the same price you'd find a Penguin Random House novel at the local store.

Anon, doesn't it feel like creative works of culture have been heavily degraded in value while assets like housing are completely inflated?

You're not going to have a healthy population and society when owning a house or a blank piece of land is so much more valuable than producing any works of art and self-expression. You'll fill your society full of bug people who are spoon-fed "culture" from global organizations...

>>18741029
Oh and one more thing, doesn't selling an ebook for $3 feel like it devalues your art? How many pages/words are those books?

Damn I love me some chocolate and mint, made me hungry you bastard! :)

if someone experiences homosexual thoughts and attraction, but they do not express or act on it in any way, objectively speaking can they still be considered gay?

>>18741077
I do. Oddly enough my actual fanbase is off the internet. I can sell books to people in person, face to face. (I guess having a low/whisper voice helps when selling books dealing with the afterlife.) So that's where most of my sales come from. I just order author copies for a few dollars and then sell them for a few books profit.
My bad habit is I'll buy the entire set and the customer will only want the first book. So then I have to reorder the first book. Just in case someone wants the set.
I only keep two or three copies around the house. I don't want to sink a lot of money into a series that won't move. Nobody has complained about my work at least so I assume people are happy with them, I just work a lot and have very little put-myself-out-there skills. If I ever get fired from my full time job between my investments and my "secret weapon" as one fan calls it, I think I'll be okay. I am not hurting in that category.
>>18741081
It's over half a million words now and they're all ~300 pages full with an 8.50 by 11 trim. I wanna sell my next book as a 99 cent ebook since its my first Romance and it's a one off, so I want people to give me a chance. I've had a lot of trouble reaching people online so if someone slaps me and says HEY. I HAVE AN ACTUAL STRATEGY. I'm very likely to listen, but then there's trust issues, paying them etc. I'm stuck in my shadows, unsure where to move next.
...but out of everyone around me, I'm in the best position. No debt, very few bills and a lot of my investments worked out. I just...need...I can do this...I'm so close...but I have to go to sleep for work tomorrow. There must be a way forward. Unfortunately the thread will likely die before I can participate again. Back to the shadows with me.

>>18738792
>But chance miracles don't occur against all odds in nature
Fucking how about LIFE ITSELF?

My friend has been writing lesbian short stories for years and is going for an english degree.

I wonder when he'll stop.

>>18741190
Didn't think the male equivalent of a fujo would exist

Is there a place in this world where the women aren't whores?

i dont know what the fuck a calamansi is but this juice is good.
im going to bed

>>18738838
>It's the kind of distance no amount of scientific advancement could conquer.
I am absolutely sure this is what people thought about the technological advancements we have right now 300 years ago. If you showed the internet to a guy from 1700 he would think it's black magic. You don't know where science will advance.

>>18741203
Well... considering the internet is enslaving humanity, I'd say black magic is right!

>>18741198
Is there a place in this world where the men aren't whores?

>>18737328
>"Como estas, mucho gusto, Este es una tienda bueno". She looked at me confounded. "Oh I apologize, you don't speak your ancestral language?"
kek

>>18741196
They definitely do. And they're just as obsessive as their female counterpats.

>>18741204
You guys from /lit/ are my black magic bros...

>>18741201
it's a philipine citrus juice made from a small plant relative of the lemon. pinoys put it on literally everything. they even mix it with onions sauce.

t. flip

>>18741219
It's a tale as old as time. Spellbooks, stories, what's the difference really.

>>18741208
Probably not. I do everything in my power to not be an animal, I often wonder what for. Nothing demoralizes me or gets me angrier than other fucking people.

>>18741227
its very good. i love going to the asian market and trying new snacks. although last time i tried some Filipino crab chips that were not the best

>>18737328
>>18737338
10/10

>>18741245
get the filipino chicaron if they have it. the vinegar ones are goat. filipine cuisine in general is very interesting as it's a natural fusion of asian and spanish. balut is a meme btw don't let anybody tell you otherwise

jollibee is based if it's in your city. fried chicken and spaghetti is 10/10

>>18741208
When you write a book telling other men that being a whore hurts yourself, it's a tough sell!

https://www.amazon.ca/City-Singles-Jason-Bryan/dp/0991825705

>>18741286
how many copies do you think you've sold by shillposting here

>>18738006
You're a based guy

>>18741533
Not about selling that book from 2013, everything I predicted has already come to pass, just hyping up for my 2nd book!

>>18741655
not that many, I take it?

>>18741699
I sold a bunch back in 2013 but the profit was soooo low on the paperbacks after having to buy them from Amazon and shipping them to my door.

miss u Q
https://open.spotify.com/track/6OtqlPXVOmdjnpFEO86Gr3?si=VK1zVDz3TkmtzCvuldNKwg&utm_source=copy-link&dl_branch=1

If this website were a real place with real people whom I could interact with in the flesh I would commit at least one murder a day

>>18736737
By no means

I have created a hell with carelessness and cruelty.

>>18742050
We would all be a lot more polite irl, both out of fear of consequences and because empathy is a lot stronger in person than over text

>>18742150
I wouldn't be surprised with that being the case. Have you seen /pol/ meet up? Total 180° from what you'd expect.

>>18742155
I don't think about /pol/ at all, at least not ever since reddit took ever

When people smugly reply that you can't eat the rich, since much of their wealth is held in stocks, do they not understand that the goal of communism is collective control of the means of production?

What america needs isn't communism, it's a reset

America should either be nuked or isolated like Japan's Tokugawa era.

6 times a day my dad goes into the bathroom by my bedroom and pisses and 6 times a day i wrap my arms around my head and rub the hair on my head to drown out his piss hitting the water in the pan. i have done this for 1 years. sometimes he catches me off guard and i hear him piss before i can close my ears and rub my head and it puts me in a bad mood.

I don't understand how boomer women watch trash TV and trash soap operas. There are these TV thrillers from the late 2010s that are so shit, it's something I wouldn't be able to sit through in no possible way. I found one of these abominations' titles and I looked them up on IMDB they get 10/10 reviews from women. I just don't understand how you can watch something like this. In olden days you could watch Columbo and OK it wasn't the most intellectually stimulating thing but it was pleasant, the photography was interesting, the characters were nice. In these things they just cry, cry, cry, and scream, every actor looks the same, every man is a hunk with a square jaw and that dead fish stare and there's no difference in looks between the bad boyfriend and the good boyfriend except that at some point the other guy without any red flag or whatever goes full mustache twirling villain and the woman screams and cries. Every act is the same, same things happen at the same time. I am sure you could run 100 of these movies at the same time and the key moments would happen exactly at the same time in all of them.
WHY, WHY DO YOU WATCH THIS SHIT
HOW IS IT POSSIBLE
I WOULD GO INSANE IF I WERE FORCED TO WATCH THIS EVERY DAY BUT YOU DO IT
AND YOU WATCH ALL THE ADS WITHOUT MUTING THE TV OR CHANGING CHANNEL
HOW IN THE NAME OF FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE

>>18741105
Yes.

>>18742472
you should post this as a review on some of these movies lol
anyway, there really isn't anything to understand, might as well just label them NPCs and move on

Thoughts on Americans who move to Europe?

>>18742803
Well, they're making better choices in life than some, but they're still Americans so...

>>18742803
Does it even make a difference at this point? Europe has become a colony of America and is thoroughly Americanized. I say this with regret. You will only be living in America with a different flavor.

I was going to post in the writing general but I figure I'll get a more targeted feel here. In short, I'm looking at doing an anthology of shorter stories in the style of Asimov that revolve around the equivalent of a space garbage man. Turns out that taking out the trash can be complicated and dangerous. Plus it lets me show off worldbuilding in natural fashion as the MC goes from job to job.

Good idea or bad idea?

>>18741198
Middle East?

>>18742986
Some might find life in parts of Europe more agreeable than America.

I’m wondering if maybe I should give up drawing.

>>18743035
How so?

>>18743110
Well, it’s just a different lifestyle, can afford a different lifestyle. It’s a consequence of culture, attitudes, and how long people have been there I suppose. There are parts of Europe which have been there for thousands of years and know what it’s like to have tanks roll through. We are babies in America and I’ve personally found that you can feel the difference in culture and worldview. To me, it feels more “normal”, more “natural” maybe.

>>18743138
>We are babies in America
Live in a different part of America, anon. It ain't uniform.

>>18743146
You misunderstand. We are babies in a cultural, civilizational sense. Escaping that in America is a complete and total impossibility.

>>18743151
>We are babies in a cultural, civilizational sense
Who cares about that? Just live your life.

>>18743109
You should.

>>18737171
Go outside and take a walk.

>>18736713
Wow, what an ungrateful son you are.

>>18739437
>will be a father soon.
Doubt it,

>>18742996
I like the concept. Do you have any sanitation experience?

>>18743319
None

>>18743326
Ah, I figured. Be careful to avoid cliches about the work and the people who do it

>>18742155
you mean this? I'm not that surprised desu, I always thought that most of them are probably just edgy teenies with no friends. Actual nazis have their own chat rooms with stuff that they would rather not share to the public

>>18743354
Could have sworn there was another one with black people in it.

>>18743354
I remember one about /lit/ where people thought they would be high-class and shit.

>>18742150
>and because empathy is a lot stronger
it's exclusively fear of consequences, people have no empathy

>>18743389
Okay you nihilist.

>>18743354
>these are the people calling you a cuck
to be fair, I think these images say far more about the kind of person who would go to a chan meetup than they do about the general audience of a board

>>18743389
They definitely do though it's possible you don't if you have aspd or whatever

>>18743393
/lit/ meetup is worse though?

>>18743354
Not what I've imagine.

New thread
>>18743416

>>18742150
>meetup in Russia
>Stabbings over Tolstoy v Dostoevsky and prose v poetry
Nothing more impolite than showing up thinking prose and Dostoevsky is the answer.

>>18743419
Russians don't care about them. I don't know why /lit/ are obsessed with them.

>>18743425
I changed it to a /lit/ meme from the actual Kant stabbing.

>>18743425
He's referring to an actual event where two russians stabbed each other in an argument over Dostoevsky and Tolstoy

>>18743443
Oh shit, I thought I was making that part up. I know about the Kant's categorical imperative stabbing and the prose v poetry one, but didn't know there was a Dostoevsky v Tolstoy one. Did Tolstoy fan win?

>>18743402
they're all bad, but that doesn't go against my point

>>18743425
so what? Russians are uberplebs, the vast majority of them. remember that it's a nation that systematically eradicated their intelligentsia less than a century ago. fuck whatever "the Russians" think.
besides, a prophet in his own country yadda yadda

>>18743451
of course, Tolstoychads win every time.

>>18743354
I want to mass shoot them

>>18743847
sounds like you'd fit right in then

>>18743425
I'm Russian and I care

>>18743855
Judging by the picture I really physically wouldn't

>>18743870
you're saying you're even fatter than some of those kids?

>>18743876
No I'm female

>>18743884
well you're a violent bitch aren't you? please dial 8

>>18743183
That’s exactly what I’m suggesting some might go to Europe to do…

>>18741198
your bedroom

>>18744071
rekt,sick burn anon

>>18743884
Seek help.