/lit/ - Literature

Nyarlathotep, Azathoth, Yog-Sothoth.

Bukowski, Joyce, McCarthy

Stephenie Meyer, Tao Lin, and Katniss Everdeen

jesus, I had a hunch

hey guys

>>>/tv/22961041

>>2641121
I'd put Joyce on offense. Look at him, he looks like a total fighter.
McCarthy on defense.
Lovecraft on support.

Marx, Chesterton, Barthes

>>2641126
/tg/ will use Lucius the Eternal as offense, or defense or support.
Probably all three. He's literally unbeatable.
And if you do beat him, you turn into him and you become a face on his armor, that is assuming you feel pride in beating one of the most powerful beings in the universe.

This is why we should stick to the amoral, emotionless elder gods and old ones, we need to think ahead of them.

Joyce, Chesterton, Lovecraft

Wait, do we get Sun Tzu?

>>2641146
Sun Tzu or Zhuge Liang is only good for armies

>>2641146
yes

Needs Hemingway on offense

>not putting Hemingway on Offense

Oh shit niggers what are you doing?

Hemingway - Pynchon (try to fucking find him faggot) - Pound (oh shit nigger, ever heard of propaganda and subversive Italian radio?)

Can't lose, won't lose.

>>2641154
True, true.

>>2641159
>>2641158
Hivemind and I like it.

>>2641165
The man fought in wars free of choice and even taught Pound how to box.

Pynchon on defense for sure. What's /mu/'s lineup?

Jeff Mangum - Jeff Mangum - Jeff Mangum

Actually yeah, Hemmingway should be offense. He covered wars, you know.
I say we go for Joyce on defense and Lovecraft on support, then.

>>2641143
I change my vote to
Hemingway, Joyce, Lovecraft

Joyce always let Hemingway do the fighting anyway.

So

Hemingway - Pynchon - Lovecraft?

This guy.

>>2641140
Yeah but /co/ has the Saint of Killers.

He literally can't be harmed and anything he shoots has to die and his bullets can't miss. Forged in the flames of Hell, killed Satan, etc.

I really shouldn't know that, but fuck off!

>>2641179

Hemingway - Pynchon - Joyce

FTW

Hemmingway offence, Pynchon Defence, David Foster Walrus support

Wait, do they have to be authors?
If not, ho boy.

>>2641179
I'd still put Joyce on defense.

>>2641179
What's Lovecraft going to do, insult any of his opponents of color?

>>2641158
>>2641159

You guys beat me to it. Boxing and Military background... he is a must have.

>>2641104
>mfw /tv/ didn't choose Chuck Norris

>>2641192
summoning elder gods and cosmic horrors for support

>>2641193
He did drive an ambulance, though. Maybe more suited for support.

But fuck it he's the man and the only other gun-crazed authors I can think of are Thompson and Burroughs and they're always wigged out on something.

>>2641204
Yeah, that.
Since we seem to be limited to authors, that's the best we can do. He just strikes me as the summoning type, a plainswalker if you will.

Lovecraft is a fucking faggot, though.

>>2641206
But what if we're not?

>>2641159
I support this

>>2641207
Yeah, Hemingway would just kick the shit out of him.

I second the nay on Lovecraft. we can do better

>>2641210
Oh, shit, nigger! We can use characters? Can we claim Old Testament God?

I just thought it had to be literature related

What if we go fictional? We can destroy them with

>offense
Old Testament God

>defense
Satan from Paradise Lost

>support
Judge Holden

>mfw no Jesus on offense
With God on our side, how can we lose? Put Hemmingway on defense.

>>2641219
>mm

Why are you on /lit/?

>>2641217
Hell, can we use Universe?

So wait, if we use characters we have
God, Satan, and Yog-Sothoth.

>>2641219
>Jesus is God
Nigga please. Jesus is a pansy. He'll just let everyone beat him up. We need some of that good ole' tribal God.

>using fictional characters
>becoming no better than /co/

Swell.

Since we can use fictional characters, I vote:
Nyarlathotep, Azathoth, Yog-Sothoth.

Vishnu
The Super Ego
Zombie DFW

>>2641226
Jesus. Nothing beats that. Seconding this as our team.

Jew God, Norse God (Thor or some shit), Greek God (Zeus or some shit)

>>2641215
>>2641217

>OT GOD

"And they shall go forth and look upon the carcasses of the men that have transgressed against Me; for their worm shall not die, neither shall their fire be quenched; and they shall be an abhorring unto all flesh.”

I liek

>>2641228
This is true. Using characters is too limitless. I propose using the Hemingway/Pynchon/Pound team. Ours will win because they actually exist.

>>2641226
Satan shouldn't go on defense.
He kind of got his ass handed to him by Micheal in Paradise lost.
Otherwise, I can see God on offense and Yog-Sothoth on support.
Yog-Sothoth holds all the knowledge in the universe, we need him.

>>2641227
Eh.
God is kind of whimsical. I can imagine us unleashing him and him turning around and being all "YOUR FINGERNAILS ARE NOW FROGS BITCHES" and going off to impregnate some whore.

offensive: Yahweh

This one should be without question.

No ban list? There should've been a ban list.

>>2641237
There's only one real person on that list, and he died recently.

>>2641233
we should do Saturn instead of Zeus

>>2641237

Seconded.

Ok, I vote Hemingway - Joyce - Pynchon

/LIT/ WHY ARE YOU RETARDED GODDAMNIT
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO NAME CHARACTERS FROM NOVELS NOT THE FUCKING AUTHORS

JESUS CHRIST WHY IS THIS SO HARD FOR YOU FUCKS TO UNDERSTAND

>>2641228

>/tv/ is using characters, not directors.
>/v/ is using characters, not developers.
>all the shitty weaboo boards are using characters, not cartoonists/authors

/mu/ is probably the only board that'll have to use real people.

>>2641228
It says characters on the chart.

>no cthulu
oh shit /lit/, what are you doing?

>>2641245
so dead people are better than fake people?

Joseph Smith
Henry Darger
Tolstoy

>>2641245

Thinking about it more, that sounds good.
You can't beat Hemingway in a fight. Joyce would be solid on defense, and Pynchon on support is a wild card.

Harry Potter, Bella Swan, Eragon

they can't lose because the plot demands it

>>2641228
>dismissing fiction
>on a literature board

>>2641250
>cthulhu touching yahweh
lel

>>2641250

gtfo pleb. cthulhu is already low tier on the cthulhu mythos, let alone outside of that fictional realm

>>2641250
Cthulhu is eclipsed in power by Azathoth, Nyarlathotep and a lot of other beings Lovecraft named.

>>2641254
>implying Hemingway, Pound and Pynchon didn't write fiction

herp da derp

I think going with Elder and Outer Gods isn't that bad an idea... just let everyone catch a glimpse of Azatoth and they'll die of fright or be rendered insane right away.

Those who don't are no match to what Nyarlathotep can do.

Yog-Sothoth can sit back and watch.

>>2641253

hahaaha holy shit /lit/, i stick around for the gold like this

just an update on /tv/ and /v/'s list

ill be here tommorow to see what choices you chose

so if you want to add the pictures yourselfs, go right on ahead

>>2641253
I laughed hardily, anon. Thank you. Can we tie this thread up, please? Just insert three pictures so we can pander to the pleb boards. Remember, reminding everyone that we're better than them is most important.

You fucking knobgobblers, everyone is using fictional characters. Why on earth would you want to us authors?

>>2641261
Looks good.

LITTLE TIP FROM /tv/

THEY SAY TO CHOOSE GOD.

John le Carre was MI6

>>2641253

...goddamnit it, this may actually be our best pick for a sure win

I'm going to through Howland Reed into the ring.

guys, we already have to face Saint of Killers, a guaranteed invincible being.

as retarded as /tv/s list looks they're on the right track with sutter cane for support - the key is pacifying the opponent e.g. driving them mad

this is where having an elder god for support comes in handy.

>>2641265
So we can appear superior and more mature.

>>2641261
I was beggining to wonder why /tv/ would pick jackie chan and bill murray. lol

>>2641271
Ostensibly superior. Obviously we'll have lost completely.

>>2641264
Reminding everyone we're better requires using brilliant authors and not sci-fi pleb fare fantasy characters. To win this game is to lose all dignity and stoop to the level of the screen watchers and comic flippers.

>>2641259
Nyarlathothep has to be offense, he's powerful and actually has control over himself.
Azathoth is better suited to defense, he'd make a good wall.
Yog-Sothoth, knowing everything ever would be good support because, well, he knows everything ever.

shiva - brahma - vishnu
seriously we win automatically

>>2641227

You clearly haven't read Paradise Lost. Jesus drives a gold chariot with flaming wheels and beats the shit out of Satan and his war machines by shooting them with thunderbolts. He's basically Keanu Reeves.

>Jesus Christ
>Holden Caulfield
>Edward Cullen

We'll mad them into submission.

>>2641272

A lot of us picked them, then the Dr. Who guys came and were like "No fun allowed". Bill Murray in Groundhog Day is pretty much unbeatable due to the time loop.

>Superman Prime blitzes THROUGH the earth to get to Bill Murray
>builds up his infinite rage, drawing power from the cosmos or whatever
>blasts billmurray into atoms and vaporizes the atoms
>suddenly is back where he started, turns and blitzes back through the earth, building up his infinite rage
>murray yawns

>>2641272
we tried to be classy

it wasn't very effective...

>>2641275
We can just use the bible gods and an obscure Lovecraft monster to do that.

>>2641275
This. Can someone just paste the hemingway/etc. pics so we can move on go back to calling each other racists and plebs?

>>2641279
>he's basically keanu reeves
I lol'd heartily.

>>2641282
>>2641281
Stay mad, latefags
Also, >>2641272 is wondering why you WOULD pick those two

>>2641279
It's a badass chariot, too. Not only is it gold with wheels of flame, it has three spirits attached to it.

>>2641281
>Bill Murray is a boulder
Sounds like real life.

>>2641275

This.

I'd go for Hemingway, Chesterton, and what the hell is support anyway?

offense: dagny taggart
defense: hank rearden
support: john galt

>>2641275
>implying video games aren't the apex of human achievement

come on guys, we've got this.

>>2641295

3/10, made me reply

>>2641293
Support would be not exactly frontline fighting (offense) or refuting/holding off incoming attacks (defense) but being able to embolden, assist, or otherwise make better the other two teammates.

>>2641298

huh, i meant to reply to >>2641294 but i guess my post still applies somehow

>>2641253

>no jehovah
Piece of shit, delete immediately.

>>2641303
>bella swan

Vampire babies aren't considered winning. To anyone.

Disregard Imposters Please Update Your List

>>2641301
This is why Pound would be great for Support in my opinion. Or maybe Gordon Lish. Gertrude Stein?

>>264129
this is the best we're gonna get

Done and done.

>>2641303
We're the only board with characters that have inpenetrable plot armor, we've effectively won.

>>2641303
Eragon looks like he has the downs

>>2641309
2/10, would reply again.

>>2641296
THIS IS BEST

>>2641312
shoo waifu faggotry

>>2641309
Do it.

>>2641303
Team Mary Sue gogogogogogogo

>>2641311
don't forget: when she turns into the vampire she becomes the prettiest, strongest vampire of them all and incomprehensibly doesn't have a blood lust that all newborn vampires have

Who's Author Cane?

>>2641305
Besides being the most influential editor of the Modernist Era he was also a propaganda radio piece for Mussolini. He was made to support.

i propose Gorgias (of Leontini) as defense

>1. Nothing exists;
>2. Even if something exists, nothing can be known about it; and
>3. Even if something could be known about it, knowledge about it can't be communicated to others.

>>2641309
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>>2641303
Let's just vote on this. I think it effectively shows how little we care about the other boards' opinion.

>>2641296
I think that would work pretty well, if by God you mean the Godhead, as in The Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost.

>>2641321
He's a Lovecraft analogue, from a movie called In the Mouths of Madness or something
Basically whatever he writes comes true

>>2641320
So she'll defeat the competition by making all the others so jealous of her prettiness, strength, and vampirehood that they fail to notice avada kedavra?

>>2641309
>>2641309
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>>2641309

Lol'd. Fuck Pleb boards.

Why is anyone taking this seriously? Fuck those troglodytes on /v/, etc.

>>2641332

Implying 4chan isn't entirely a pleb board...

>>2641334
>not knowing how to imply

Yahweh, Azathoth, Cronus

Come at us.

you know i spent a while finding the right images on photoshop etc

shiva is the destroyer and ultimate god, no explanation necessary
pynchon is unfindable and apparently unkillable, god knows that old fart should have died long ago
and yog sothoth is obv support, he'll just drive any invincible opponents mad, the end

BUT FUCK IT /LIT/, THIS IS NOT THE WAY

THIS TEAM MAY BE THE WINNINGEST TEAM

BUT /LIT/ PLAYS FOR FUCKING KEEPS

GOGOGOG THIS TEAM:

>>2641303


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>>2641303

>>2641332
I agree. Let's just run a vote.

I vote Tri-Joyce

>>2641334
>not carrying yourself as if you're the only patrician for miles and that everyone else isn't some philistine neanderthal

I shiggy diggy,

>>2641303
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>>2641339

I'm okay with a Joyce-triad

>>2641309

YES YES YES.

>>2641340
And that is why this board is shit.

Tri-Joyce: 2

Mary Sues: 2

Yahweh offense. Yog Sothoth, support. Defense?

>>2641309
I already posted this image on /tv/, so I guess that's that.

>>2641349
Azathoth or Nyarlathotep defense.

>>2641354

so, is this it? i'm okay with this.

I vote Yahweh on. Make the others jokes or whatever you want, but put Yahweh there.

>>2641303

fuck every other suggestion itt

>2641253

lolol

It's all about James Joyce here, the patron of this board and Ayn Rand his Antithesis, per se... Now, what about a third author, Vonnegut, Palahniuk, Ellis, Pynchon, Meyer, Collins, Rowling, maybe perhaps Mr. King?

>>2641354
>>2641358
>being fucking retarded

>>2641261

It's not over yet

>>2641362
>>2641358
>>2641354
But it's just plain wrong. Like, the labeling of the people themselves is wrong, the team isn't that bad.

>>2641367
>tfw late

OFFENSE: Gilgamesh - oldest recorded fiction hero. The fact alone that he's a hero means he MUST win. If we chose an eldritch abomination then they'd be destined to be defeated by one of the other board's heroes.

DEFENSE: Osiris - As god of death, Osiris repeatedly brings Gilgamesh back from the grave allowing him to continually attempt every possible strategy for victory.

SUPPORT: Sherlock Holmes - Also a hero, more specifically has ridiculous amounts of intelligence and insight to makes him adept to figure out the proper strategy to defeat all the other boards, including methods to ending unconventional strategies like Bill Murray's time loop. Like Gilgamesh, Osiris allows him to infinitely plan out victory.

>>2641371

that's the joke.

>>2641354
I guess the vote has been subverted. Polls are closed. Discussion is over. Tri-Joyce wins by sneaking into the White House with little objection.

>>2641370
This is what we should go with.

>>2641370

better version was alreayd psoted here

>>2641338

but that's irrelevant because >>2641303 is clearly the superior team

>>2641303
didn't you hear
no fun allowed

>not choosing Sisyphus for all three
do you really even want to win
give in to the boulder

>>2641375
I want this.

i swear to god if this tri-joyce faggotry is selected over this genuinely clever submission >>2641303 i'm never posting on here again lit

I vote for whatever the stupidest possible team is

So Eragon McDragon, Dobby, and Ignatius J Reilly

These guys are right:
>>2641303
>>264>>2641303
1303
>>2641311
>>2641325
>>2641362
>>2641380

There is only one REAL choice here:
>>2641303
>>2641303
>>2641303
>>2641303
>>2641303
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>>2641303

The fuck, guys? Stop posting your dumb lists in /tv/ without any agreement.

>>2641392

it doesn't matter, the tripfag in charge of this does the final picking anwyays

let the retards be retards

>>2641303
I support this because, again, this competition is immensely stupid and such a stupid grouping of characters is the only appropriate response. Fucking throw Bella out there. Who gives a shit

>>2641376
It's just not a funny joke.

>>2641383
So many great choices in this thread now. I literally can't decide. I'm sure I'll be good with whatever you guys choose at this point.

>>2641389
I think you just voted for team plot armor:

>>2641303

>>2641396
>implying an autistic tripfag can tell a joke from his arse

>>2641396
>lovecraft fan
>no sense of humor
Makes sense.

>>2641303
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>>2641396

Fair enough.

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>>2641303

DON'T BE FUCKING RETARDED LIT

THE ONLY WINNING MOVE IS TO NOT PLAY

I REPEAT

THE ONLY WINNING MOVE IS TO NOT PLAY

>>2641303

>>2641400
>Psychologist
>Autistic
Yeah, being autistic and having my job wouldn't work very well.

>>2641407
>implying /lit/ doesn't love being super try hard

how can you beat /co/ they literally have god on their team and the Saint of Killers killed Satan and could presumably kill god as well

>>2641409

hence all the HURFDRUF JOYECE getting thrown around

>>2641303
>>2641303
>>2641303
ironic victory for sure, I'm down with this.

>>2641408
Seems to be working

>>2641410
i think he did kill god actually

but plot armor demands different results vs. >>2641303

>>2641410

see

>>2641303

>>2641412
Best part is that the original proposer was a sage artist.

OH MY GOD /LIT/ IS IT HAPPENING? IS A CONSENSUS FORMING AROUND >>2641303 ???

MY FAITH MAY JUST BE RESTORED

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL /LIT/

THANK YOU

>>2641303

I feel like the Mary Sue team is being forced...

>>2641303
Plebeian
>>2641309
Patrician

>>2641419
My god...could it be the fabled....

POST-IRONIC VICTORY?

>>2641423
If this was an entirely serious thing you'd be right

but the complexity of humor involved here makes you wrong, i think. one joke is rather funny, the other is typically arrogant pretentious "patrician" /lit/ bullshit

>>2641426

lol'ed

>>2641426

hahahahahahahahaah holy shit

>>2641426

can't stop laughing at spoilers, 10 out of fucking 10

>>2641303

It's perfect, as was pointed out the idea comes from >>2641253 which was sage. We necessarily win by default using characters even we think are shit from a poster who didn't want to participate in the first place.

It will be a triumph, /lit/. Don't fuck this up.

This is fucking happening, man.
I am fucking HERE!

>>2641375
this is the only anon using his head, but this thread is fucking retarded anyway

>>2641438

why does it have to be serious? can't we have a little fun if the thread is retarded anyway?

thread continued here

>>2641439

It's futile at this point, but I'm still putting this out there.

>>2641438
>Making serious contributions in a pic with cartoon characters
>jasonalexander.jpg

>>2641483
perfect for me