/lit/ - Literature

In France, during the French Revolution, a group of about 10 lower-classed French nobles ran away to the country side to take refuge in a small castle. It was the last outpost of the French Royalty. They had all fooled themselves into thinking that the French army would crush the rebels, as they had in the past, and they would be able to move back into Paris. However, the longer they stayed in the castle it began to dawn on them that they would probably be the last French royalty to live. Soon a heirarchy was established to keep order. Their heirarchy was based on how far they could trace back their nobility. François, who was chosen to be the leader, was the great great grandson of the Duke of Lyons. The lowest on the list was Marie, her father was just appointed the title of Baron.

Soon they all began to bore of talking about the jovial life of Paris, and how dirty and disgusting the peasants really are. The nobles, who were not married, began to fall in love with one another. However they would refuse to fall in love with someone who was too low on the Heirarchy. Marie loved François and longed for him, but because she was the lowest on the list, she couldn't even talk to him.

On one warm summer's day François diary had been stolen. Soon the entire castle would know of his secret, he was a werewolf. He was staring into his mirror with tears forming in his eyes when he saw the visage of a green imp appear in his mirror.
"I am Green Goblin Man and I have taken your diary. Unless you do what I say I will tell the entire castle of your secret."

"Oh no! Please don't! I'll do anything, I promise." François said to the Green Goblin Man.

Marie, who had gotten into a habbit of listening in on François' conversations overheard this and bust through the wooden door.
"Begone Green Goblin Man! We don't want you hear ANYMORE!" Marie yelled. Green Goblin Man was scared so he ran away, but Green Goblin Man was not idle, no. Green Goblin Man built a huge phallus like tower and a cage next to the tower. Next he created a devil's poison that would kill anyone who drank it in 30 minutes.

Green Goblin man snuck back into the castle at night and brought Marie into the tower, which only had 1 room at the tippy top. He laid out the poison, and also laid out an antidote. Next, he brought François into the cage and laid out the poison in there. Green Goblin Man then locked the cage and waited for his plan to come to life. You could not imagine the suprise of Marie and François when they awoke in such a strange place! They were yelling and could hear each other's voices and began to strategize.

It was then when Green Goblin Man came back to the phallus and the cage. He explained
"Hee, hee, hee, you have both fallen for my trap. Both of you have an antidote, and both of you have a poison. However you each have different poisons. You will have all the food you want, but you will have no water until you drink the poison which will kill you in 50 minutes. Marie, you have the antidote for François and vice versa. When François drinks his poison, his cage will open, and he must try to bring the Antidote to you, and once François' poison is cured the phallus will collapse."

François and Marie began shouting and strategizing more when Green Goblin Man left. It was decided that Marie, tonight, would weave her hair together to make a long enough rope for François to climb up into her room so they could drink each other's antidote. When the time came François drank his poison quickly and started to climb up Marie's hair. Marie had nothing in her room. No bed, no furniture, just an open window and a huge stockpile of bread. She had positioned herself so that her arms and legs and head were jammed into the crevases of the rocks near the window, she could not move.

François came to the window opening and looked Marie. A grimace was still stuck on her face, and her neck was 4 feet long. She killed herself for François. François took the antidote and he began floating down to the Earth along with Marie. "Oh God Marie! Why?! WHY!? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS GREEN GOBLIN MAN!?" Green Goblin Man Appeared and said "You both had the same poison and the same antidote." And then he flew away leaving François with a dead Marie in an open field near a castle in Southern France.

reported for spam and flooding

If you're such an avid writer and want to share it with a community, go to deviant art.

Cool story bro?

Can you please write a crime noir story about a detective hunting a serial killer who MO is killing furries?

I'd like to mention that I'm a Post-Philosopher Minimal Existentialist, and that unless you are part of my literature movement (which I doubt there's only 5 of us) please refrain from expressing your entrylevel reviews, however you CAN tell me what you enjoyed about the story and who was your favorite character.

>>578495

Can you please write a crime noir story about a detective hunting a serial killer who MO is killing furries?

>>578495
reading it again was every bit as good as reading it the first time.

>>578493
What is crime noir?

>>578495
My favorite character was John when he accidentally the whole demon.

>>578498
Who was your favorite character?

>>578506
Green Goblin Man for posing a philosphical quandry to François and Marie and exposing their follies when they tried to solve it.

>>578505
reported for trolling

>>578511
You know he's just the bad guy right? The real deep part is the connection between Marie and François

>>578500

"Hardboiled" crime fiction. Apologies.

>>578513
I can't hardboil stories, they would come out all soggy and turn into mush, how would I post it much less read it?

>>578510

>>578517

Figure it out nigger.

>>578519
Reported for trolling

>>578521
I'm a Post-Philospher Minimal Existentialist, not a chemist. YOU figure it out.

why do you keep doing this? no one reads your stories and they just make fun of you.

>>578523

>>578527
Hey fuck you.
Philospher is the voice of this generation of this decade

>>578527
Someone asked too. That guy liked Green Goblin Man saying he was a quandry for philosphy while expressing francois' inner love for his mom and showing Marie's secret penis envy. So someone liked it.

Nice going forfeiting your FNASR, idiot.

I'm submitting your story to ZWG now. I'm submitting it under the pseudonym Gertie Cummings.

>>578530
Thanks so much, e-mail me sometime at Philosoph.Chan@gmail.com

>>578526

>implying you understand Post-Philosopher Minimal Existentialism

>>578535
I already submitted this to ZWG, so they already know it's from me. They promised to put me in the next issue.

>>578537
>Implying I don't

>>578535
Someone already tried submitting his genius to the ZWG, but they're too close minded and entry level to understand and so shunned it.

>>578542
lol yeah me.

>>578537
Brah can't even spell philosopher correctly, don't worry about it.

>>578538
>I already submitted this to ZWG

Good for you, they're a real exclusive publication. They don't publish just anyone, you know.

>>578550

He's the only writer they turned down.

Wonderful work Philosopher-Chan. Although I do support the idea that you write a crime piece about a detective that is hunting for a furry killer.

>>578553

And here's the cherry on top >>578551

>>578553
I'm an editor of ZWG, I turned myself down because ZWG is too small time for me. I already submitted my stories for the New York Times and the Los Angeles Times respectively.

>>578549

Sup baby. Wanna cyber?

>>578556
You're retarded if you think that's actually a ZWG editor.

I absolutely loved everything about it. It made me wonder if each and every one of us possesses our own "green goblin man". I mean, the situation with the cages obviously represented the paradoxes in our lives that we could easily solve if we set our minds to it. We need to learn to overcome our failings and rise above them to achieve a greater standard of humanity. Again, wonderful story.

>>578553
Despite how much I hate P-chan, I was saddened.

Then, I laughed my ass off.

>>578551
Sup ZWG editor, how's that anti ZWG magazine coming along? I've already figured out a name for it ADT

http://zinewritersguild.wikia.com/wiki/The_Editors

>Note: The 'ZWG Chief Editor' is a butthurt troll that usually goes by the name of Philospher-chan [sic]. He is attempting to fill the role of '/lit/'s resident troll'.

>>578555

>>578565
They really think I'm ZWG cheif in editor. I wonder if I'm being trolled by him now.

>>578562

Fuck you cunt.

>>578565
prole is actually pretty butthurt because ZWG chief editor made like 3 threads about how dumb prole was and stuff like that.
he and philospher are different people.

>>578558
Have you ever heard about my interpretation of justice? It states that every man does the one job that they are most suited for, and I can assure you that writing is not your job. If you were in my utopia, you would bring it to ruins. I advise you read my scrolls "Republic" and then never type another story ever again.

>>578569
Trolls trolling trolls, to be preceise.

>>578571

lulz

>>578571

Who's saying I'm butthurt? ZWG Chief Editor is just a troll who is wasting my time.

This writing is so bad it would make

>>578570
No really the name corresponds with ZWG it's just backwards like A is the first for Z. It can be called like. ACTION DYNAMO TIMELY

>>578575

http://zinewritersguild.wikia.com/wiki/The_Editors

>Note: The 'ZWG Chief Editor' is a butthurt troll that usually goes by the name of Philospher-chan [sic]. He is attempting to fill the role of '/lit/'s resident troll'.
http://zinewritersguild.wikia.com/wiki/The_Editors

>Note: The 'ZWG Chief Editor' is a butthurt troll that usually goes by the name of Philospher-chan [sic]. He is attempting to fill the role of '/lit/'s resident troll'.

HE IS JUST A NIGGER FROM /b/

Woefully sentimental.

>>578583

If you start that Zine I will blackball you and you will never be published.

FUCK YOU

I don't know what the hell is going on in this thread but it's awesome.

>>>>/b/

Spill-over for this thread.

Philo-chan and ZWG editor in chief are faggot trolls who are ruining the ZWG Zine so if you are concerned about it please ignore them and tell them to suck my fat cock.

>>578591
we can kind of tell from the link you gave us that you're using the wrong trip.

>>578591
You are butthurt that I called you mentally retarded

excuse my previous posts i'm a huge faggot please rape my face

>>578597>>578591
Not even the real prole's lol

I just uploaded all of my stories to the ZWG so if you want to read them there you can.

make a crap load of tripfag names that are as similar as possible to the ZWG editors tripnames and make a crap load of troll/misinformation threads. also fuck up their wiki

>>578607
tru dat

I'm a fag cake and I like testicles.

WHO WANTS SOME HOMOSEX WITH ME?

I'm the real Prole.

I don't get it... who's fake, and who's legit?

I am Prole.

>>578619
basically, nobody in this thread is legit except for Philospher himself.

I am the real Prole. Please excuse the others. You can tell it's me by my huge gaping asshole.

Niggertits Prole. Suck my asshole.

Enough with this bullshit, proles, get the fuck back to work.

>>578629

I will stick my dick into your ass so fast your asshole will pucker and suck my shaft up to my balls.

>>578635
2 + 2 = 5

>>578635
Bitch, you can't even handle true love. Enjoy your betrayal and Victory Gin, ratboy.

[color=red]GREEN TEXT HERE[/color]

Testing trip

>>578731
You fucking fail at tripping.

I want to do artwork for the 'zine...
Like graphic design.

>>578461
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This thread is hilarious. I approve.

I see that Philospher-Chan threads are filled with retardation. That is why we do not take your submissions seriously.

>>579027

Please post some samples. Otherwise I will assume you are a troll.

This is the only correct trip for Prole:
Prole !XDERDXUpqQ

>>579609

Prole troll is obvious. This had been shown a while ago.

ITT: former prolocaust

Thanks for keeping this alive for so long guys!

Haha, it's not dead yet. That's a real deep story you got there.

>>581956
Cunt.

>>580265
I bet you're the one that deleted all my stories off of ZWG, so tsundere

>>581971
No, that was me actually. Wanna cry about it fag? You mad?

>>581980
You seem pretty mad, but I'm fine with your tsundere for my stories.

>>581982

Tsun-tsun, only. Yangire, if you push your luck.

>>581982
>>581982
>boofuckinghoo how will i troll if you just delete me?

>>581982
Keep that weeaboo shit of /lit/, and go crawl back up your mother's gash.

>>581994
>>581985
>>581988

I pretty much laughed out louded at you tunsdere retards.

bamp

>>582025
>>582027
I pretty much raged outloud at your samefagging.

>>582060
That really isn't me though it's pretty funny, but it's not like I can prove it.

Did you like the story?

People in /lit/ get so pissed at PC that they call anyone that bumps his thread a samefag. lulz /lit/ lulz

>>582070
>>582072
painfully obvious samefagging

ITT: paranoia

Trolling - Like attention-whoring for people with no self esteem. Or cam-whoring for the ugly.