/lit/ - Literature

[Friendly Neighbourhood Spiderman !!imEIcTjbs/H No.1672655]

Hey, /lit/.

I never post any creative stuff, but I've hit a brick wall here. Any advice going? It's a very rough draft, so all comments welcome.

Door. And five
recent translucent years
harmonise
on the gravel drive.

Acoustics
twist in planted trees
and catapult
across the way
lay stricken on the roof.

The parents
caused a fire on the path
to keep him out.
The pen-artists
long stopped caring
for the prayer
and the prayer.

And the prayer
is to time compressed
time squeezed
until pellucid thoughts
need curtains.

[Anonymous No.1672657]

Don't quit your day job

[Friendly Neighbourhood Spiderman !!imEIcTjbs/H No.1672660]

>>1672655

It doesn't feel finished, like there's a stanza and a half I haven't quite worked out yet. Oh, well. I think I'm off to bed. I'll check back in in the morning...