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/lit/ - Literature


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[ERROR] No.18596878 [Reply] [Original]

What book unlocks the ability for me to stop caring what other think about me?

>> No.18596881

Why do you think a book is gonna help you?

>> No.18596884

>>18596878
martial arts and weight lifting

>> No.18596898

>>18596881
Hey a guy can dream, also anyone else have this crazy ass new captcha slider?

>> No.18596908

>>18596878
Having really good facial bone structure.

>> No.18596914

>>18596878
The big book of (inb4 reddit): being confident in yourself.

If you value yourself, you wont desperately care about what others think.

>> No.18596919

Is there a book that can achieve this power???

>> No.18596921

stoicism

>> No.18596922

>>18596878
Fromm and the Stoics, I'd say
But it's probably something that comes more with age

How old are you? Are a you a shy person?

>> No.18596934

>>18596878
The ability's already unlocked. You just have to use it.

>> No.18596940

>>18596934
Teach me senpai

>> No.18596952

>>18596922
>Fromm
tf is that baby?

Erich Fromm?

>> No.18597012

>>18596952
>>Fromm
>Erich Fromm?
It seems you know the answer, why ask?

>> No.18597060

>>18597012
Which book, he has many

>> No.18597073

>>18596878
The Imitation of Christ

>> No.18597157

>>18596878
The best thing is to remind yourself constantly to think about how you view other people. Not once do you look at someone and go "haha look at that retard". You don't even notice other people. When a guy is jogging down the street you don't even notice him. If you do you have no negative thoughts. If someone fucks up in a conversation you don't even think twice. Everyone is just thinking about themselves

>> No.18597179

>>18596878
maturity, though since you've only just started puberty you can read the Greeks until it becomes obvious

>> No.18597226
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>>18596878

>> No.18597349

>>18597226
You're surely joking.

>> No.18597394

>>18596878
Stoicism will help you do this. Actually any philosophy that helps you achieve ataraxia will probably achieve this as a spillover effect. Find one that works but I'd suggest stoicism.

>> No.18597429

>>18596921
>>18596922
>>18597394
Please only post recommendations that aren't gay reddit philosophy

>> No.18597436

>>18596878
books arent going to solve your problems dude, they can be nice helpers along the way but you will never find one singular book that will simply change you as a person. maybe you'll get that impression if youre new to reading and read some cool new ideas but it's up to you to do the actual changing. Not caring what others think takes practice, try a bit today, if you fail thats fine, try again tomorrow

>> No.18597521

>>18596878
You're trying to stop caring what other people think but you still care what you yourself think. Foolish, no?

>> No.18597525

>>18596878
Time.

>> No.18597529

>>18597157
this isn't true at all. people look at what I'm doing all of the time. I walked out of Walmart with bananas and some condiments last week and some fucking dude leaning on his truck said "what you just came here for bananas?"

no im not schizo but people make annoying comments like this shit all of the time. i'm studying in the park and people fucking stare at me to wonder if they're bothering me or not. well now you are because you're fucking staring at me like I have a responsibility to acknowledge you

>> No.18597601
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>>18597521

>> No.18597617

As much as I know it's a long shot I know there must be SOME book or philosophy or technique that allows someone to overcome this feeling of caring about what others think of you. It has to be out there. I know it's also evolutionary. We inherently care how we look to others to fit in so we aren't exiled. But there has to be a silver bullet for this NANNNNNIIII

>> No.18597639

>>18597060
Doesn't matter which one in particular, he offers a good outlook on life. Read as many as you can is the best I can tell you

>> No.18597642

caring about what other people think helps stop degeneracy.

>> No.18597647

>>18597429
Die.

>> No.18597662

>>18597647
Not very stoic of you

>> No.18597671

>>18596914
What? Sorry I can't decipher what you're trying to say.

>> No.18597947
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>>18596878
Embrace the schizo mindset.

>> No.18597957
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>>18596878

>> No.18597996

>>18597957
cool artwork, not usually a fan of black metal but I'm listening now because I'm open to anything

>> No.18598310

>>18596878
You don't need to read a book for that. Changing your mindset is the best way to deal with it.

>> No.18598427

>>18597529
>>18597617
>>18596878
You probably feel exposed and vulnerable, like you have no safe haven to which to escape. You need people in your life, and maybe a fiancee or a wife. Books won't help you, but changing your circumstances will.

>> No.18598460

>>18596878
Just smoke some weed.

>> No.18598597

>>18596878
These girls used to tickle each other before bed, just for silly fun :3

>> No.18599319

>>18596884

Honestly this. I started because I *really* cared about what people thought, and 10 years later those original insecurities are pretty much dealt with.

Although, probably just getting older helped lol.

>> No.18599394
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>>18596878
>>18597617
I'm currently reading this and it's hitting some of those targets.
I've always felt like I had to get someone else's opinion or approval before doing something. If someone didn't like something I liked it would weigh on me. I also feel like I have to justify my existence and always be ready to explain myself. Even if I didn't do something wrong, I'd prepare explanations in case people thought I did, and offer up that information even if they never asked for it.
Anyways I hate being like this and I'm trying to change and only answer to myself from now on. Most people don't even have your best interest at heart, they're just projecting what they want for themselves and judge you for not acting like they would.

>> No.18599705

>>18596878
Read goodbye, things by fumio sasaski. It will help you escape the prison of being scared what others think of you. Its what happened to me after I finished the book.
Also watch this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4jzzDYLgro

>> No.18599734
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She just wants to help you be your best self, anon.

>> No.18599785

Be courageous. All emotional problems are just fear in different clothing. Reconceptualize your anxieties as the underlying fear, and realize that all it takes to overcome is to conquer your fears.

>> No.18599826

>>18596878
Nothing. You're self-conscious for a reason. If it's because you're ugly (be honest), that's never going away. You might develop a epiphenomenal callus as a young adult, but the right words are like razor blades. If you're average, that'll haunt you whenever you witness others being exceptional. Pretty people aren't here, so no worries.

>> No.18600046
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>>18599826
100% projection.

>> No.18600104

>>18599394
>I'd prepare explanations in case people thought I did, and offer up that information even if they never asked for it.
The latins had an aphorism for that (unsurprisingly)
Excusatio non petita, accusatio manifesta

More or less "Coming up with a justification when nobody asked you, you are literally accusing yourself"

>> No.18600110

test

>> No.18600111
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>> No.18600191

>>18600104
Good to know I can still be called out if I meet a 2000 year old ghost

>> No.18600192

>>18596878
The problem is that you're ugly. Good looking people can be assholes, faggots, shy or weird and women will think its cool and emulate them. It's not about not caring, it's realising nobody cares about you because you're ugly and at best can be used as a comedy relief.

>> No.18600201

>>18597529
He was just trying to make friendly smalltalk autist.

>> No.18600217

>>18600201
Honestly, if that's the truck driver's idea of small talk, he is the autist, same for you

>> No.18600266

>>18596878
Meditations by Marcus Aurelius helps

>> No.18600550

>>18600266
I said no gay philosophy

>> No.18601411

>>18600550
just because he liked banging little boys once in a while does not make Marcus gay, ok?

>> No.18601442

>>18596878
One day you'll wake up and it will be gone that's what happened for me atleast LOL but I did some pretty retarded embarassing things before that though

>> No.18601451

>>18596884
This.
>The tao te ching won't hurt, though
>>18596898
Yeah, I like it though

>> No.18601461

Self-help books will only convince yourself of stuff you already believe in. They're useless.
Meditation, Weight-lifting, and martial arts help tremendously.

>> No.18601494

>>18601461
I do 2/3, still haven't gotten into regular meditation, I even bought a book on it but I'm being really lazy about it.
Does it really work? I'm still not entirely sold on the idea of just sitting and thinking about nothing solving so many problems

>> No.18601519

>>18601494
I don't know if it's placebo or what, but it works for me. It helps me focus in other parts of my life, which in turn helps me direct my attention away from thinking about other people. It is also nice to have a dedicated break from the noise of daily life.
I imagine it isn't for everyone and it's a hard sell, but try it consistently 15 minutes a day for a week or so and see how you like it.

>> No.18601530

>>18601461
another way to look at it is that self help books plants the seeds of ideas, you'll need to nurture them yourself for them to be worth anything to your life

>> No.18601547

>>18601519
I have had some benefits from reading the book, learning that I don't have to listen to my thoughts and such, but I haven't fully committed. Did you have any anxiety issues it helped with? That's probably the biggest benefit it could have for me if it works.
I probably need medication but I don't go to the doctor

>> No.18601563

>>18601547
>Did you have any anxiety issues it helped with?

I don't really have anxiety issues for it to help with.

>> No.18601577

>>18597529
this nigga eatin beans

>> No.18601604

>>18596878
You will always care what other people think. You need to accept that, then start caring about what you think more than what others think.

>> No.18601623

>>18596878
The Holy Bible, all that matters is what God thinks of (You).

>> No.18601670

>>18596878
The only thing that can help you achieve such an attitude is experience. Having some Mark Manson-esque fuck tell you to "just stop caring, bro" isn't gonna do shit.

>> No.18601710
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I know it's not /lit/ but it made me stop caring about people's opinions

>> No.18602061
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someone drop the redpill NOW

>> No.18602260

>>18600201
nah he was just being annoying

>> No.18602301

>>18596878
No book does that. You do, anon.

>> No.18602342

>>18602061
the best thing thing you can do in order to not give a fuck it´s showing vulnerability
(i.e. letting people as soon as you meet what kind of person you are), after that, think you will immediately notice
that your brain isn´t that invested about other people and you can say whatever the fuck you want because already know
that this is expected of you

>> No.18602353

You're a human being. Human beings are social animals. No book is going to completely rewire your innate social programming.

>> No.18602439

>>18597529
meds, now

>> No.18602860

>>18596878

Are these booktubers?

>> No.18603033

>>18596878
What's difference between that and being shameless? Cuz being shameless is a horrid trait.

>> No.18603135

>>18596881
>>18596898
Books can definitely do this. It has worked for me at times, I just can't recall... Probably some beat adventure, or some kind of degenerate erotic novel. Or maybe Herman Hesse

>> No.18603139

>>18596914
I can't tell if posts like this are ironic.

>> No.18603148

>>18603033
Low social status = Shameless
High social status = Confident

>> No.18603305

the bible, unironically

>> No.18603521

>>18597529
Once I was walking down the street and some dude in a car yelled "hey Seth Rogen" as he was driving by. I shaved my beard the second I got home and got a new haircut the next day. People who say "people don't pay attention to you as much as you think they do" are fucking liars.

>> No.18604009

>>18603521
it seems you are in need of this thread as well as me my friend

>> No.18604076
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Mein Kampf. Read it in public places with the cover visible to help yourself no longer care about what others think of you.

>> No.18604096

>>18604076
This would actually work

>> No.18604102

>>18604096
yeah, if you want to get sent to the hospital by mentally ill americans

>> No.18604144

>>18596878
I care about what others think of me. I care a lot.