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/lit/ - Literature

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File: 99 KB, 1200x820, write you fuckers.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
18651707 No.18651707 [Reply] [Original]

Writer's block edition

Previous: >>18645980

For Prose:
>The Art of Fiction
>Story Genius: How to Use Brain Science to Go Beyond Outlining and Write a Riveting Novel (Before You Waste Three Years Writing 327 Pages That Go Nowhere)
>On Becoming A Novelist
>Writing Fiction: A Guide to Narrative Craft
>How Fiction Works
>The Rhetoric of Fiction
>Steering the Craft
>On Writing, Borges

For Poetry:
>The Poetry Home Repair Manual
>Western Wind: An Introduction to Poetry
>This Craft of Verse, Borges

Related Material:
>What Editors Do
>A Student's Introduction to English Grammar
>Garner's Modern English Usage

Suggested books on storytelling:
>The Weekend Novelist
>Aristotle's Poetics
>Hero With a Thousand Faces
>Romance the Beat

Traditional publishing
> Formatting manuscript
> Write a query
> Track your query

Other Resources
>General grammar/syntax/editing help
> When/where/how should I write?
> What software should I write with?
> Amazon Publishing to make that KDP monie
> Be like Charles Dickens and write serially
> Basic overview of the Screenplay format

>> No.18651729
File: 491 KB, 3737x2081, wow-nice.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Believe in yourself.
Post your writing.
Keep it positive!

>> No.18651735

What a shit start to the thread. Couldn't you wait until the old one was archived?

>> No.18651746
File: 9 KB, 212x283, Capture.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.18651750

>he doesn't understand the bump limit
shooting for 1k words today. gl anons

>> No.18651757
File: 263 KB, 1080x1920, image_2021-07-14_151447.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Part of an unedited WIP chapter, if people want to critique they can I guess, don't care much for it.

>> No.18651762

No, he’s right. /lit/ is a slowboard. There’s no reason to make a second thread when the old one can last for hours.

>> No.18651790

I like it!

One thing I would do if I were you is use something like Grammarly to give suggestions that will cut down the "wordiness" and help you prune a bit here and there. Giving your writing a "haircut" is like my 1st pass after a completed draft. Oh and nice work with your tenses!

>> No.18651797

Aww, thanks for the kind word anons. I do actually use Grammarly and doc in edit passes once I'm done writing.

>> No.18651935

I like this advice and it'll probably be how I end up doing the rework. I still have some structure problems because the draft as-is has a prologue from Alice being chased where it's ambiguous if she escapes followed by Part 1 which is Jane gradually retracing her steps and discovering the high ranking member of the investment firm (let's call him John) Alice had fallen in love with had killed her before tracking him to a Indian reservation that was the sight of a development planning to kill him. This is where she finds Alice alive which leads us to Part 2 which is Alice getting involved with the conspiracy, falling in love with one of its John, getting pregnant (much more significant in context) and having to hide with the help of her boyfriend. Part 3 is the conclusion back from the perspective of Jane as the conspiracy who has been monitoring Jane hoping she'd lead them to John and Alice. The conclusion is the three of them winning the tactical fight by becoming the new leadership of the firm which is a sub-faction of the broader conspiracy.

While I could split the story into alternating chapters it does mean I'll need to rework a lot of the order of events and John becomes a very different character. In Part 1 he's effectively a villain who probably killed the protagonist's sister and in Part 2 he becomes one half of probably the best romantic story I've ever written. Alternating the two stories is probably the solution.

This whole thing is an absolute beast to work with, it was originally this multi-POV monstrosity set across a hundred years with intersecting plotlines and these two massive dueling conspiracies but it was just too convoluted so I've told myself if I finish this story I'll write the rest as sequel/prequels. I've never written a novel before, it's all been plays and short stories but Jesus Christ it's so much harder than I thought.

>> No.18651962
File: 1.22 MB, 1080x1293, 1548216469216.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I dont know what to write about
how do you guys choose what to write about?

>> No.18651986

I write what I want to read, which is space notlesbians, and space naval battles duking it out with hundreds of thousands of people dying meaningless deaths.

>> No.18651990

By not being an indecisive fag.

>> No.18652007

I only write short stories because I'm a shitter who can't conceptualize using 500k words to say one thing
just whatever comes to mind

>> No.18652033

does my story have to have a protagonist? I hate character development.

>> No.18652039

I guess you could have a string of overlapping characters but it'd be pretty hard to tell a compelling story in that framework for any length of time.

>> No.18652046

Ah. This information would have been helpful last thread. I'd have to think for a while on how to restructure Jane's story, but I think it'd still boil down to a similar idea of picking up and leaving off.

>> No.18652048

What a retarded question.

>> No.18652056

Damn dude you're so smart.

>> No.18652061

no but it should because you probably have no clue how or why you would tell a story and it'd just be a jumbled retarded mess
it is a retarded question. if you have to ask the question is yes

>> No.18652070

Yeah I realized from your response I'd been unclear. Alice's story has been greatly extended from the first draft because I discovered I found her a lot more interesting than I'd initially expected to.
The irony is that the only way that would work is if each character that encountered the plot developed rapidly. In trying to get rid of a protagonist you need to just write a whole load more protagonists.

>> No.18652135

I write about what I like. I like noble knights and romance and intense emotions, so I write books about that. I also like farce comedy, so I write books about that too.

>> No.18652149

I unironically try to write in every genre to see how it feels. Usually it'll mutate into something other than what I initially intended but the purpose is to write something you connect with, not to write what you planned.

Gay as it sounds, I've been writing quite a lot of romance into my stuff lately. I'm not very good yet but it's a really fun way of having characters interact and it's a never ending well of drama.

>> No.18652186
File: 8 KB, 272x185, dufake.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>don't know what to write for an interlude.
>mc is on his computer.
>have wild idea of having him browse 4chan.
What board should I use /wg/?

>> No.18652200

/pol/ and make him a left/right wing extremist who sees the error of his ways and becomes a right/left wing extremist

>> No.18652206
File: 56 KB, 500x800, ErasedCover500x800.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Chapter 39 released.
Man, the problem I'm running into now is there are spots where I start editing and then I get an idea to expand the chapter into two. Its good I guess, adds more, but its a lot more work than I was anticipating. But it does get me back in the habit of writing basically everyday, which is invaluable. Anyway, hope everyone is making progress.

>> No.18652242
File: 1.60 MB, 1972x1670, Screen Shot 2021-07-14 at 5.02.03 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Here's the opening to a novel you'll see promoted in alt twitter circles in a month or two

>> No.18652267
File: 48 KB, 708x561, 1551286857528.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>2nd person pov

>> No.18652280

No the narrator is just addressing the dog, Favrino, as you, as she will throughout.

>> No.18652293

Altera! You're on the wrong board!

>> No.18652305
File: 1.10 MB, 1724x1204, Screen Shot 2021-07-14 at 5.16.33 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

another excerpt.

>> No.18652313

>second person.
>prose that comes off as forced and uses archaic words improperly
>holy formatting.
Anon, just what exactly is this? A proof of concept for something to flesh out on /qst/?

>> No.18652318
File: 45 KB, 750x735, IMG_20190910_114412.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>as you

>> No.18652325

Your ideas are awesome, funny how you self-criticize yourself for giving good advice.

>> No.18652329

Unjustified text really makes me furious. So does first person POV. So I'm justifiably angry now

>> No.18652335

What are you trying to do with adding so much description to the apartment?

In my own writing, I barely describe the looks of characters or more than just the basics of a location. I feel, in my opinion, that it forces the imagination to work harder and provides more of a reward?

>> No.18652343

uhhhhhhhhhhhhh, /lit/, and have him shitpost in this general
otherwise /k/

>> No.18652358

Thanks man, I appreciate it

>> No.18652363

I'm the character you've written. Why did you make me this way? Fuck you.

>> No.18652365
File: 1.15 MB, 1680x1328, Screen Shot 2021-07-14 at 5.20.28 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

none of these words are archaic lol. did notice a typo (should be tearing not tear)

generally my process has been to overwrite and keep some of the excesses and prune away at some of the others. In the end it's about what works, what's funny or interesting. This excerpt for example genuinely might be overwritten. I'm trying for an idiolect that mixes modern coastal elite vernacular with English romance-era poetry, so my method has been trying to overwrite and then underwrite until I find the right mix.

>> No.18652374

Are you mad right now? Because 4chan's text is left justified

>> No.18652377

between your writing and your posts you seem like the type to start crying and throw a tantrum if someone said something negative about your writing

>> No.18652384

yes the narrator's addressing the dog
it's a first draft it won't look like that on paper
I have a taste for visual writing. I like the immersive style. It's also important here because everything being described is just slightly more affluent than where the narrator's living.

>> No.18652387

I'm always mad at unjustified script in books and online articles. It just looks ugly. On messaging boards, I don't give much of a crap.
Curious, why alt Twitter circles to circulate your writing?

>> No.18652390

What's wrong with first person POV?

>> No.18652395

half of all English romantic poetry was written by softboys so that's definitely the vibe I was going for.

>> No.18652408

Dreams or whatever comes to me during the day. Reading tends to help alot.

>> No.18652412

I liked the gentleman-slapped-lover line you had in the first image. Good writing there. I still feel the description of the apartment is a bit long. Could chop up that paragraph and add more detail to the place as the characters/scene develops?

>> No.18652413

I'm mutuals with all the post-2015 /lit/ refugees. Used to post here a lot but it got boring.

>> No.18652429

yeah my method is overwriting and then pruning on the second draft.

>> No.18652430

>mc is still grieving his little brothers death.
>little brother was sick with *insert terminal sickness*
>the only way he copes now is by baiting barneyfag lee on /qa/ and posting overwatch footfag fetish art bullshit to piss off lee even more.
>just came up with this.


>> No.18652456

Holy shit, it's the second coming of Amanda McKittrick Ros!

>> No.18652463

I don't know who that is and I'm afraid to Google it out of fear of bursting a blood vessel

>> No.18652467

Haha my writing is like:

They walk into the apartment, it's modern and very nice. They chat and the woman reveals that she needs help taking out the bad guy. Man contemplates, has a drink of whiskey, opens his drawer and takes out a gun. He states his price, she agrees and leaves.

Then once I have the story outlined, I go back and add the detail and such.

>> No.18652474

>She tried hard to keep herself a stranger to her poor old father's slight income by the use of the finest production of steel, whose blunt edge eyed the reely covering with marked greed, and offered its sharp dart to faultless fabrics of flaxen fineness.

Translation: she worked as a seamstress to help her father pay the bills.

>> No.18652487

minimalist seethe.

post your Raymond Carver prose.

>> No.18652488

Usually, I write short stories about what I like. No great novels or anything like that, just some simple stories

>> No.18652503

Every day I get new book ideas and characters that intrude on my thoughts.

>> No.18652511

show some

>> No.18652512

I don't even know who that is

>> No.18652522

just post something. I'm the only one that's posted anything so far.

>> No.18652530

Thanks. That’s very in-depth! I’ll try to rewrite it with your feedback in mind. I just like Classical references, by the way, and I imagined that the monster was an alien akin to our tale of Scylla. But if it feels out of place, I can give it a do-over.

>> No.18652570

Actually, I wasn't seething. I was mocking you. You can tell it was a joke because of the absurd statement combined with the excess of emotion. I just demonstrated two fundamental writing skills which were totally missing from your excerpt: precision word choice and context-appropriate tone. I did this for you out of the kindness of my heart. I am probably the best friend you have in the entire world and you don't even realize it. Here is some of my work. For context, the narrator is describing his teenage years in the Florida panhandle circa 2005. In this scene he is talking about browsing Myspace on the living room computer with Drake and Josh playing on the television behind him.

>I have never been able to find this particular episode online, but it really struck a chord with me that day. It was the one where Drake and Josh’s Dad and Stepdad is going insane trying to get tickets to a midnight showing of Dazed and Confused at the movie theater where Drake and Josh or maybe just Josh worked part-time. You ever seen that movie? Dazed and Confused? It came out in the 90’s, but it was set in the 70’s. It was about a bunch of kids on their last day at High School, and there was a scene where some of the main characters sneak into a drive-in to watch a showing of Grease. I’m sure you’ve seen that one, it was from the 70’s, but it was set in a High School, during the 1950’s. Well anyway, the main characters in Dazed and Confused are watching Grease, and it gets to the scene where Danny Zuko has to sneak past his dad to get to the big dance, and his dad is passed out drunk with an episode of the Twilight Zone playing in the background. I believe the particular episode they showed was called “A Stop At Willoughby” and it’s about a guy who’s stressed out from the high-paced lifestyle of the 1950’s, and he keeps falling asleep on the train ride home, and he dreams of an idyllic lifestyle in the 1890’s. At the end of the episode he finally tries to consummate his misplaced nostalgia by jumping off the train, and it is revealed that he actually sleepwalked off a moving train in real life, leading to his death. I thought it was pretty dumb, but I guess it does make an interesting point about how constantly wishing that you lived in the past, instead of focusing on how you can improve things in the present, is a lot like committing a form of spiritual suicide. But anyway, the dad from Drake and Josh walks out of the movie theater afterwards, and he’s kinda weirded out because Dazed and Confused was nothing like what he remembered, but then again, he wasn’t actually paying attention to the movie the first time he saw it, he just happened to go see it with his girlfriend on the night he lost his virginity, the last time he truly felt young and alive, and instead of getting that feeling back he just realizes that he’ll never lose his virginity again, which sucks because he really botched it the first time.

>> No.18652592

Not him but I posted an extended excerpt in the 3rd post... what am I, chopped liver?

>> No.18652636

No, he's just on the bargaining stage of the grieving process as he comes to terms with the negative reception of his excerpt.
Stage 1, denial: "It's not bad, you're just not reading it right, blah blah romanticism."
Stage 2, anger: "I'm not seething! You're seething!"
Stage 3, depression: This is a personal moment, we're not going to see any posts which reflect this significant inner shift as he starts to realize that he may be misjudging his own talent.
Stage 4, bargaining: "Well, at least I'm actually contributing material to the thread. That's got to count for something, right?"
Stage 5 is right around the corner, pretty soon he'll realize that he isn't very good, and we were right to mock him, and he'll close the thread and go do something else.

>> No.18652647

>but then again
>but anyway
>well anyway
you don't need these subordinate clauses, they're there to keep flow but they do the opposite. Personally I'm bored with Batemanesque cataloguing of pop-cultural effluvia, but you definitely have that affect and stuff like that sells, though it's not new or interesting.

>> No.18652657

me trying to engage the senses with prose next to my summarizing of events is really jarring

>> No.18652687

why? this general is dead as fuck.

>> No.18652720
File: 724 KB, 1520x1488, Screen Shot 2021-07-14 at 6.37.50 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

anyone can write your disaffected minimalist style about a lost youth thinking about movies and television. I wrote a full novel of that stuff and then decided not to do anything with it because it was boring.

here's me doing your thing, which I gave up on because it's boring.

>> No.18652722
File: 724 KB, 937x823, coyolo.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


I'm thinking the sequel to "The Shitkickers" will be called "Coyolo" and borrow heavily from my "Jaguar" novel as one of the major plot vehicles is that Stanely Park has been taken over by a charismatic crackhead who burrowed underground into a large cave. He then goes about recruiting other crackheads and build a sort of "pirate's cove" of stolen bikes and such. He also builds a drug lab and begins to experiment on coyotes, creating a super coyote that is like the size of a wolf.

Since the police have been defunded in The Shitkickers, a group of progressive-types begin to get upset as more and more of Stanley Park is too dangerous, and people get mugged of their bicycles on the seawall. Meanwhile, the Coyolo group living in the park grows and grows in size as a lot of people decide to live off the grid, and they believe that the coyotes have MORE of a right to be in the park than bicyclists and tourists. They venture into the city and pickup chemicals ordered online to help breed bigger and meaner coyotes. Some of the aberrant-minded characters from The Shitkickers gleefully manipulate both sides of the conflict so they can ride in as the hero and gain political power while the main character finds himself being manipulated, again, and battles against his alcoholism and anxiety disorder.

(un)Funny enough pic related JUST happened.

Anyways hope you like my shit and thanks for reading!

>> No.18652733

>assuming anyone ever gets past stage 2
the only hope is that they stop posting out of shame
so what if someone doesn't like your writing? blackula poster gets made fun of literally every single time he posts but he still keeps at it and has a good attitude

>> No.18652734

This particular excerpt is way out of line with everything else in the story, but it was the only part I could find that could really stand on it's own without overdoing the character limit. It could probably be cut, but I'm going to keep it in.

The thing with the subordinate clauses. I can't see how they interrupt the flow. I put them in because this passage was meant to have a conversational tone, but upon re-reading it seems to me as if they perform effectively. Like a little head's up that I'm starting a new thought.

>> No.18652743

I like it! It's great!

3rd line from the bottom is driving me crazy to see "wouldn't" twice on the same line. That shit makes my schizo itch.

>> No.18652796

>Some of the aberrant-minded characters from The Shitkickers gleefully manipulate both sides of the conflict so they can ride in as the hero and gain political power
Reminds me of that Boondocks episode where Ed Wuncler Sr. exploits Grandad's restaurant popularity addiction to force the city to sell him a public park so he can build on it

>> No.18652802

is it autobiographical?

here's mine btw, about a video game journalist.

>The Top Ten First Person Shooters That Really Needed Aim Down Sights. Nothing would ever get better again. He had his dream life: he got to play video games for a living. He had to write about them too but that wasn’t a big deal. The work wasn’t hard, it was just words. His site’s in-house style didn’t encourage the pathetic literary flourishes of their more intellectual competitors. No one had to write about the social context a game came out in, whether a games development cycle lead to divorces or suicides. No one had to ponder whether video games were “art” or account for a given title’s artistic value. You just described mechanics, longevity, bang for buck, like any product review. The difference between writing about video games and leaf blowers was enthusiasm. There were no autobiographical asides. Writers typically used a minimalist advertorial style. They never overtly encouraged you to sound like ad copy, you just got better opportunities that way. In this listicle Kipper already twice used the word “meaty” to describe headshots. The unfamiliar assemblage of keys made everything excruciatingly slow. Usually with work like this he could enter flowstate, slot in the ready-made phrases, and finish with minimal conscious thought. But now every word came slow, distinct, premeditated. He heard the sentences in his beanie-topped head.
There was a niggle under his word-thoughts: am I a hack? Certainly not the first time this question insinuated itself. Usually he didn’t care though. He could just check out, fill his word-count, take something prescribed with something recreational, check out. Usually he didn’t care at all. Everything was usually okayish like that. Thinking about it though made him want to aim down sights up at the roof of his mouth.

>> No.18652824

>want to share with /wg/
>pastebin SMART detects offensive content
What? Where am I supposed to post?

>> No.18652846

I looked at this Amanda Ros lady's Wikipedia page and actually found a great quote by Huxley worth sharing and remembering for personal writing.
>In Mrs Ros we see... the result of the discovery of art by an unsophisticated mind and of its first conscious attempt to produce the artistic. It is remarkable how late in the history of every literature simplicity is invented. The first attempts of any people to be consciously literary are always productive of the most elaborate artificiality. Poetry is always written before prose and always in a language as remote as possible from the language of ordinary life. ...The Euphuists were not barbarians making their first discovery of literature; ...But in one thing they were unsophisticated: they were discovering prose. They were realizing that prose could be written with art, and they wrote it as artificially as they possibly could... They became intoxicated with their discovery of artifice. It was some time before the intoxication wore off and men saw that art was possible without artifice.

>> No.18652908

>here's me doing your thing, which I gave up on because it's boring.
Half of this sentence is right. You're getting better! The other half, the important half, is wrong and if you can't see why, then you're probably not quite at the level of skill where you can actually be helped. I want you to understand that I'm not mad at you for being this way, just disappointed :(. But anyway, I'll try to list the differences between my excerpt and yours.

You can tell that my excerpt started with an observation: people are very often nostalgic for things which meant nothing to them when they were actually experiencing them. I wanted to express this observation to other people, and I chose to do it in a way that would be immediately evident to anyone reading: by listing examples which prove my point, and by featuring both a main topic sentence (actually, this was left out of my excerpt, but in the previous paragraph it was mentioned that the narrator wasn't actually watching this episode of Drake and Josh, it was in the background while he used the family computer in the living room. My bad) and a conclusion sentence, where it is noted that the fictional dad from Drake and Josh wasn't actually paying attention to Dazed and Confused either. As noted in another post, this story isn't about film commentary (especially because literally nothing besides the Twilight Zone thing actually happens in any of the media I describe). It's about a missing scientist in the Florida panhandle. You'll also note that I use specific examples, because I knew what I wanted to say before I got started saying it, hence the overall cohesiveness of the excerpt.

Your excerpt appears to contain nothing but a series of meaningless actions and observations, none of which relate to one another beyond simple cause and effect. It's thin air. It's especially hollow because you don't take the time to immerse the reader in the sensory details of your environment, which is literally the only value this excerpt might actually have. I cannot believe you actually forced yourself to type out a novel's worth of this dull garbage, but if there's a word for "impressed, but confused and slightly concerned for your ability to make rational decisions" then that's what I feel right now. Congratulations, your writing is so shitty that it actually inspired me to feel a new emotion!

>> No.18652926

How is that excerpt meaningless?!?! I thought the part about sitting in the chair because he'd just lie in bed all day was great. Hints towards the character being depressed without saying it.

Geez you guys are so mean to each other. Why?

>> No.18652935


>I scrolled down the gallery, each little pane left unseen as my gaze skirted covertly around the room instead. An ugly mix of blues and greens and the interface’s pure white was in my hand, and on it my stare seemed fixed, I hoped, to someone looking on - really, though, I watched the background, moving around the empty cafeteria; by the windows, Nick and Ali, Hannah and her friend huddled on a bench, another two girls close by, Alex in the entranceway, loudly coordinating with Mother Alex for pick-up.
So then, too intimidated by Nick’s adult presence to go over and join them, and the bright spotlight of alone-ness too public, I’d got out my phone and pretended to be busy.
Alex’s phone call echoed now off the high ceilings, decked out with flying plastic sculpture - a PVC lattice or something - and the cafeteria seemed emptier than before. Ali and Nick’s conversation, though his sharp lips I couldn’t read, took on a conspiratorial air at this distance.
Alex, Nick, Ali, sharp, stone-cut names, of that generation, I thought. Nick and Ali matched, Nick with his cold, close shoulders rolling under baggy jumpers, the slightly more sympathetic -li in the other coupling his softer, rounder cheeks. Alex, I reckoned, didn’t match at all - the theatre in his motions as he paced the floor, holding the phone to his reddening ear secondary to the roll of passionate hand gestures - the sterile Alex couldn’t hold his largeness in its clinical letters.

>> No.18652964

The only part I didn't like was the choice of "the theater in his motions"

Why did you use a hyphen in alone-ness?

I like it!

>> No.18652966

he's bitter because his Kmart-realist pablum didn't find a publisher and now he's in his late 20s (maybe even early 30s) shitposting about how a forever-unread BEE knockoff is ackshually the way everyone should write.

many such cases.

>> No.18652975

There is about five-hundred words in this novel which might be considered autobiographical, as in a literal depiction of things I've done, as opposed to just using past experiences as a foundation for fiction.

As for yours, it is very rare to see a sample on /wg/ which cannot be objectively improved. The only criticism I could make would be personal, and that is that the tone is just a little too... something for me. I actually went and dug out a copy of Lost World by Michael Crichton to see if there was any difference between the way he describes his character's jobs and the way you do it, and really there aren't any. I wouldn't say you are as good as Michael Crichton (which wouldn't really be a huge compliment) but I also couldn't say why I don't think you are. I guess I'm just more inclined to accept a published novelist's style as more "valid" than an amateur, hence why something is bothering me here but his work doesn't. The only specific thing which really sticks in my craw is the phrase "beanie-topped head." Something about that specific style of compound word ("his clothing-adorned bodypart") just gets me. Maybe it's redundant, like if you're wearing a beanie I can probably guess where on your body it is.

>> No.18652999
File: 120 KB, 620x920, QZ6JTQFJZRD7NBB2KQ4FCWQGIQ.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Well... books like Confederacy of Dunces was rejected so many times before it won a fucking pulitzer?

I mean, there is plenty of garbage published. I bought "The Glass Hotel" after seeing Obama recommend it, thinking that it must be good for a President to comment on it.

Fuck it is so boring. I fell asleep reading it every single time. Gave up halfway through.

>> No.18653009

"Publishers" are just normies with jobs. I mean, anything brilliant is going to go over their heads. Have you ever been to a "writer's fest"? Might as well be a BLM or feminist meeting with how woke and progressive EVERYONE is. I guarantee there is no publisher out there who would even look twice at a novel about a vigilante written by a straight white bro in Canada.

>> No.18653013

Holy shit. Since everyone is getting hung up on the fact that I mentioned movies in my excerpt, I'll post something else from the same novel.

>The boatman was right about one thing: it was not comfortable out there. It must have been at least ninety degrees, pouring rain beneath the moonless night sky. A fully-clothed hot shower from which I could not escape. There was nothing to be done but follow the remains of the trail. The trail had indeed grown over, but there was a youngness to the vegetation, as legible as braille, which guided me inexorably onward through the bottom of a looming canopy of climbing scrub.

>Every inch was a fight. Every step was a struggle. Gasping and heaving, I thrashed my way through the wet shrubbery. I pushed onward. I slipped under. At times I heaved myself upon the bushes and rolled forward, plunging down amongst the thorns to begin the push anew. Every leaf and every thorn clung to my wet clothes, their springy branches slapping against my face and dragging backwards across my skin before releasing with a sudden snap. My machete was useless. The underbrush was too soft. It absorbed the blade and then sprung back without making a scratch.

>Bolts of lightning, miles long, cracked constantly across the sky. Never was there a moment without the constant rumble of thunder. I looked up into the rattling tap of the endless rain to take my bearings. There were none to be had. The stars were invisible. Nothing but the looming hills of green bathed in the shimmering blue shine of the lightning. I had tried using my flashlight earlier, but it did little more than cast a thin disc of white against the flat blackness of my surroundings.

Before you get started, you'll note that this very much does meet the definition of minimalist prose. Hence why I did not post this one first, because Captain Purple Prose wanted something a little more expressive. Again, you'll note a lack of philosophical/social commentary, which is something I called out in the other anons excerpt. The reason I made that specific criticism is because he said his was "just the same as mine" and I felt compelled to point out the main difference, which is that I had a point to make.

>> No.18653030
File: 100 KB, 615x615, 1609774053901.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Publishers are very confident in their taste for people who continually put out stuff fewer and fewer people seem interested in reading. Success with them is either connections, or persistence. But persistence is not success. They seem to think they control taste and culture, publishing within their clique which they conflate with old aristocracies as a small group of taste makers, when they're just butchering culture to fit their limited abilities, and we get lucky if something halfway decent squeezes through.

And that recommendation was probably a political favor.

>> No.18653036

>Emily St. John Mandel
I could have told it you it was shit just from the name of the author. Is it just me or do author names really add weight to the gravitas of a story?

>> No.18653054

I'm being a dick because I think it is amusing.

I did actually stop and think on that line about the chair, but the conclusion I reached was that I used to do the same thing, but I wasn't depressed so it didn't click with me like that. And being totally honest, this could actually describe my usual evening routine at the age of twenty-four (get stoned, hit the weights, drink a protein shake while trying not to taste it, sit down in my bedside chair and do internet shit for a while). It's just missing that special something that might take it beyond "relatable" and into "profound."

I love you anon. I never meant to hurt your feelings, I was just trying to be entertaining, and I will stay in this thread all night encouraging you, if that's what it takes to get back into your good graces.

>> No.18653057

I liked this a lot. It flowed very cleanly and smoothly. The only thing that slowed me was this line in the first paragraph.
>The trail had indeed grown over, but there was a youngness to the vegetation, as legible as braille, which guided me inexorably onward through the bottom of a looming canopy of climbing scrub.
Maybe it's just the fact that someone a thread ago mentioned front-loaded sentences, but "The trail had indeed grown over" put into my mind a gnarled, bushy overgrown mess and then "youngness to the vegetation" made me think it was shorter, so I had to pause and redirect my thoughts and get restarted on reading again, which I felt damaged the reading of the piece. Otherwise, these paragraphs are clean, crisp, descriptive, and enjoyable.

>> No.18653079

>front-loaded sentences
lol that was me. I was kind of hoping people would just be mystified by the phrasing I used and hopefully blame themselves if they don't understand it, but obviously that plan failed. I think I could use some direct guidance here. How would you phrase a sentence which is meant to contain the following ideas:
>I am surrounded by tangled thorns and vines
>At one point there was a trail here, but it has grown over and is no longer visible to a casual observer
>The plants which have grown up from where the trail used to be must logically be younger/shorter than the surrounding vegetation, so I should be able to follow that to where I'm going

>> No.18653081

Just please, do not buy The Glass Hotel, goddamn I almost cried from the boredom. Then I realized that I'm so schizo that normies probably love boring shit because that is most of their lives. When I read a book and the characters aren't more fucked up than me, it gets boring.

The viciousness that /Lit/ posters and /Adv/ posters have for strangers is something to behold. I've seen friendlier Liveleak Brazilian prison fights.

>> No.18653107


With each step, the vegetation around Ken got thicker and the path less visible. He lost sight of the frenzied coyote when faced with an impassable wall of prickly thorns and thick vines- the trail under his feet disappearing under gnarled roots and dead leaves. Carefully moving aside some of the thorny branches, he spots some younger, greener shrubs, and a quick glance of the coyote disappearing into a trapdoor near an old tree trunk.

I just wrote that hot garbage above, it is how I would describe it. Ken has to track down the steroid-and-meth fueled coyotes that are being used to terrorize Vancouver park-goers.

>> No.18653136

Yeah lol I know what you mean about the viciousness here. I think a lot of it is the anonymity.

>> No.18653171

Authors tend to be emotionally sensitive, I mean, it's part of why we write! The attacks on people here just chase away anyone who doesn't seek some sort of abuse. That's how we end up with the same idiotic shills like me, Gardner, and Waldun who enjoy being shit on, hahaha!

>> No.18653184

>I think I could use some direct guidance here. How would you phrase a sentence which is meant to contain the following ideas:
>>I am surrounded by tangled thorns and vines
>>At one point there was a trail here, but it has grown over and is no longer visible to a casual observer
>>The plants which have grown up from where the trail used to be must logically be younger/shorter than the surrounding vegetation, so I should be able to follow that to where I'm going
That's a lot to cram into one sentence without front-loading. Let me give it a try a couple of times.

>I looked for the path I knew existed, and in the confusion of the twisted thorns and endless vines there was indeed one narrow corridor of noticeably younger plants which led me deeper into the foliage.
>The thorns and vines and shrubbery blended and obscured the trail quite well, but I caught sight of a line of younger, smaller plants against their long weathered cousins and followed their youth into the arbor.
>The trail had seemingly been swallowed by vines and thorns, yet I found a line of vegetation that was shorter and younger than the others, and this I followed through the vines and into the forest.

>> No.18653231

Would be interesting to see more people try and write this little tidbit. Nice to see different styles.

>> No.18653261

The trail was eaten over with wild green overgrowth many years gone untended. But off to the right I saw an opening stretching off into the woods.

>> No.18653280

Reads like shit.

>> No.18653284

Wow great input! Thank you.

>> No.18653302

Be more pacific with your "criticisms" bro

>> No.18653308

it's "spacific" you dolt

>> No.18653354


>> No.18653375

Google Drive

>> No.18653390

I forgot to mention, the tone I'm going for with this character is "paramilitary contractor who is totally over this shit."

It might just be smarter to have my character bring a compass and a map. I think it would add to the sense of frustration to have him try to read a map with one hand while holding a flashlight in the other, with a thunderstorm making it impossible to hold the map up.

>> No.18653428

>start to work on my website a little bit
>wanting to clean it up, update it to current projects, reformat some things
>start writing blurb about current project
>can't think of how to describe it even though half the book is written
Am I fucked? How do I say "this king-to-be after his mother's assassination goes on a simple diplomatic mission, gets attacked, mistakenly drafted into the army, and is forced to fight his enemies then run back to his capital city and free it from the slimy fuck who tried to have him killed in the first place" and follow it up with "then he makes peace with the enemy, for now, falls in love with the enemy king's childhood friend, and fights off assassination attempts and rebellions from an unhappy populace"? Is my book just boring?

>> No.18653432

We don't care.

>> No.18653436

You cared enough to reply. Help a nigga out.

>> No.18653442

I care but I'm retarded so I can't help you

>> No.18653449


>> No.18653450

A king betrayed and exiled from his home seeks vengeance in a tale of romance and blood.

>> No.18653457

Actually pretty apt. Something like this might work.

>> No.18653464

If you end up using it can you do me a favour and read some of my shit? Drop me an email through my website jason-bryan.com

Or if you need some friendly advice you can always drop me a line. Feels good to help out a fellow author!

>> No.18653638

I don't mind at all. I'll need to fix up my website more, though.

>> No.18653732

Moesha woke up slowly, drifting in and out of partial consciousness. Her room was dark, and her bed was soft and warm. She heard a muffled fluttering, a light tapping.

“Is that you, Jamarcus?” she said drowsily.

No answer. Moesha opened one eye and recognized her old hotel room in Whitby.

“Jabari? Dr. Van Hassain? Room service?” she asked groggily. “Please, come in.”

To her left, she heard a loud creak. The window was open. Outside on the windowsill was a dark night sky and bright, silver moon and – oh, no! – normal flowers. Where were the South African geraniums?!

Moesha bolted upright and got out of bed with the intention of closing the window, but she was still weakened from giving blood to little Thomas earlier that afternoon. Before she took two steps, she collapsed on the ground. In front of her, she noticed a shadow that didn’t belong to any of the objects in the hotel room.

The shadow grew rapidly, expanding outwards and upwards into a dark, cocoon silhouette. The cocoon unraveled, revealing a pair of long, wide, dark wings attached to a Black man with a white Afro.

“Oh!” exclaimed Moesha.

“Good evening, Madam Murray,” said Count Blackula. “I thank you for your invitation.”

“It’s Madam Harker now,” replied Moesha. “And my husband and Dr. Van Hassain know all about you!”

One side of Count Blackula’s white mustache moved upwards as he smirked.

“If you do anything to me, they’ll know it was you,” continued Moesha. “My husband will avenge me.”
Moesha looked for a weapon as she struggled to get on her feet.

“Madam Harker, allow me to assist you.”

Instantly, Moesha felt herself lifted to her feet. Count Blackula’s hand supported her head and the small of her back. He turned her head to the side and pushed it back.

“Ah!” gasped Moesha.

“You will eventually come with me in my castle in Transylvania,” said Count Blackula. “For the time being, I will have to make sure that you stay silent about me to your companions. I must warn you: this will hurt for a short time.”

Count Blackula’s canines grew longer and sharper, and then he bit into Moesha’s neck.

>> No.18653736

What are Blackula's weaknesses? Child support?

>> No.18653756

This isn’t a cartoon, please don’t double down on exclamation and a question mark. Pick one to fit the mood.
>switches from present to past to present
Why are you doing this? There’s no reason to do so unless you’re going in and out of perspective or time itself. Also why is Blackula from Transylvania if he’s African? Can’t he be from Timbuktu, Queens, or Compton? Overall, it had an alright set up with a funnier ending. You need to work on timing and maybe a punchline if you wish to write humorous prose.


>> No.18653772
File: 125 KB, 1052x760, Untitled.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


> switches from present to past to present
are you talking about the gerunds?

> Also why is Blackula from Transylvania if he’s African?
He's not African, he's Black-Hungarian. Everyone in this universe is black. There are Black Americans, Black British, Black Europeans, and of course, Black Africans

>> No.18653781

>He is Black Hungarian
Transylvania is in Romania.

>> No.18653785

Ethnic Hungarians live in Transylvania. And original Dracula spoke Hungarian

>> No.18653796

Alright, so is he a black form of minority in a downtrodden region? Does this occur after the dissolution of Communist Romania, before, or during?

>> No.18653806

Original Dracula (and Blackula) took place in the late 1800s, during the Austro-Hungarian empire. I'm not a history buff but I don't think Hungarians were minority status at this point in time. This was also far before WW2 caused the cannibalization of Hungary to its neighbors and the balkanization of Eastern Europe.

>> No.18653811

I just find the more blaxploitation vibe being post 1960s, so I got confused. Sounds interesting nonetheless.

>> No.18653824

I actually have Dolemite on my to-watch list, which would be my first blaxploitation film ever. I'm pretty excited about it. I also finally understood the Blacula reference on Psych


>> No.18653842

Lol Corey Feldman

>> No.18653895

what happened to the ebonics

>> No.18653909

Blackula doesn't talk in ebonics, only the people he bites do. It's like how Obama speaks standard English, but most black people talk like Shaqueesha. My theory is that Obama doesn't even natively have a black accent, he is forcibly affecting it 24/7 ever since he went to college in Chicago and became a black community leader. He grew up in Hawaii among whites and Indonesia among Asians, how would he have learned the black accent?


>> No.18653919

ok sure but why do the people he bites speak in ebonics?

>> No.18653940

>treating art like stat grinding in an MMO

>> No.18653946

If you live as an artist, this stuff helps keep you motivated...

>> No.18653949
File: 309 KB, 1306x877, 1595285434285.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

uhhh ... hmmm. Good question. I actually don't know. I guess I needed a way a way to blackly differentiate a vampire from a human, and ebonics came to mind. Lore isn't my strong suit apparently

>> No.18653953

Well done. Is it well-written though?

>> No.18653960

Make it so that because garlic is one of the 11 herbs and spices that Blackula can't enjoy fried chicken, however, he can taste the chicken grease floating in the blood of his ebonics-speaking victims. He has found the more his targets speak ebonics, the more likely it is that they eat fried chicken regularly.

>> No.18653971

That ... that is unironically a brilliant idea. It will be done!

>> No.18653977

Dude I am so full of ideas constantly, if you ever need help, drop me an email on my website jason-bryan.com and I will always find the time to reply!

Godspeed anon

>> No.18654016

Not him but your website looks good. How do you know the exact percentages of your book’s completion though? Do you have a GANTT chart?

>> No.18654046
File: 885 KB, 1500x1291, 01.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Oh man thank you, I have to work on it, I've been so fucked since the heatwave. My glue is all shitty now from being above 40c for several days. I've barely been able to shitpost on /Lit/ and try and avoid alcohol.

The percentages are mostly a joke, but in general, it's kind of how far I am in outlining the plot. Pretty much most of the work on my books, the difficult part, is just having a few sentences outline each chapter. Once that part is done, finishing the rest of the book becomes easy.

>> No.18654052

Les architects anti-plotter Aktion

>> No.18654058

A book, for me, begins when I can imagine the first page and the last page. Then fill in the chapters with one sentence.

>> No.18654063
File: 95 KB, 240x240, terasakichihori-8.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>tfw finish writing and editing 8k word chapter
>already almost midnight
>almost going to be a week past deadline
at least it's over with, haha...

>> No.18654068

Listen to Sex Pistols or high energy 160bpm music to squeeze all your creativity out.

>> No.18654122

>Tracking your progression bad
How much have you wrote recently?

>> No.18654177

That person doesn't write. They snipe at people like you and I on here.

>> No.18654197

>haha numbers go brrr

>> No.18654208
File: 65 KB, 850x567, 8745654.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

She chose me because I was the strongest. And I had stolen her heart at first glance. Or so she tells me. But it doesn't matter. What mattered was her. And the children we would have.

I don't know if she would give birth like a human but it will be an interesting time when it happens. I wonder if it will even look human. When I was turned I lost my semblance of a human visage. My bones contorted and my limbs shifted. I could feel the evil of her poison seeping into my soul and corrupting my humanity.

But it passed and my body came back to it's original shape, if not improved. My eyes are a startling cobalt blue now from a dull olive green. My neck, and arms, and chest, and lower body are as massive as a body builder's. My voice is rough but mellifluous and kind enough to drawn in strangers. I could see in the dark and I could see the ghosts of people that refused to pass onto Heaven or Hell. Inessa calls it 'fallen vision'. I don't know whether it's a curse or a blessing, being able to see the dead, being able to see your victims standing there, watching you with their bodies torn apart. Sometimes I taunt them with the virility of life by embracing Inessa, sometimes I talk to them and even befriend them.

I didn't find Inessa anywhere in the house. Her clothes right where we had tossed them. I wasn't worried though. She must have gotten hungry. Sometimes making love does that to her. Fill her with a need for mortal flesh. I know it happens to me too.

Like now as I walked to the window and looked out at the inviting full moon; at the welcoming darkness of night. Unlike Inessa, I wasn't a full blooded demon like her. I could walk in the sunlight but it was so out of place for me. I felt alien in the daylight and I could never wait to get home to her.

I opened the window and launched out from the two story fall and landed on my knee in the grass. I closed my eyes and when I opened them again, I could feel the blue in my eyes vanish and be replaced with a dark red pupil surrounded by a swallowing darkness. I felt the claws push out from my nails and my bones start to shift to my new unholy form.

The night was young and fresh and I could hear the beating hearts of so many from even as far out as here. It was enticing and fed the craving building in my body.

You could call me and Inessa evil and you would be right. But the truth was that we were the apex predators of a world that no longer believed in God or the Devil or even their selves. The world had become bountiful and ripe with this material loss and faithlessness. We exist because the word monster meant nothing to anyone anymore. We exist.

And we thrive in the misery of the coming decadence of time and culture.

You could call us evil but we're no more different than the average person in this current time. Except we'll out live them and live to see The Judgement.

>> No.18654435

I assume 0 than? Care to share any?

>> No.18654443

This place has become so much meaner over the last fyears.

>> No.18654457

Please, too much caressing and stroking cheeks

>> No.18654656
File: 23 KB, 392x207, words2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

What pleasure do you get from these meaningless numbers?

>> No.18654666
File: 140 KB, 625x604, EcibIx5XsAU_ot3.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]


>> No.18654735

The numbers mean nothing. Keeping track of your progress dosen't have a deeper meaning.

>> No.18654751

Word count is a really bad measure of progress. It doesn't tell you how much work you have left and gives a false impression that what's already there is somehow "complete".

>> No.18654755

>makes bad faith assumptions that someone else is making bad faith assumptions

>> No.18654776

Other than words book have no measure for progress.

>> No.18654812

the standard for writing progress isn't measured in the amount of writing done, but rather in the amount of posturing done to those who do write
every pseud knows this

>> No.18654843
File: 499 KB, 1125x2436, View recent photos.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

How is a word count meaningless when it leads to this?

>> No.18654859

congrats bro

>> No.18654869

Thank you so much. I appreciate that. Fucking long ass road to get here.

>> No.18654948

We came, We saw, We conquered


We came. We saw. We conquered


We came -- We saw -- We conquered


We came; We saw; We conquered

Basically, which is the best way to connect three extremely similar independent clauses. And before anyone says the comma splice example doesn't count because it's grammatically incorrect, William Strunk (elements of style) says it's fine for small independent clauses.

>> No.18655039

Ok, i tried uploading an image but my ip range is blocked or some shit so here comes some cloggin of the thread:

The roar of a thousand giant wasps echoed across the landscape as the VTOL flew past jagged cliffs and patchy mesas. Ragged figures squinted up and stared wordlessly after it, and the whirr widened and subsided as the flying machine slowly turned to a dot against the pale evening sky. A flash came where it had disappeared and long after came the sound of thunder dampened by the distance. The figures stared at each other in awe, then one of them lifted a spear toward the sky and spoke.
“God has struck it down! The demon has been struck by God’s hand!”
“Hallelujah!” shouted another and soon the whole group picked up the chant and repeated it.
A third voice was heard above the chant.
“We should find it! Find it and kill it if it isn’t dead!”
They cheered in a final praise to their god and set off across the dusty earth and patches of shrubberies toward the thin pillar of smoke rising at the crest of their horizon.

>> No.18655054

> shrubberies
heh, they should be the knights who say ni

>> No.18655254

Your numbers tell no story.

What is your word count flaunting but empty posturing? Post what you've actually written or fuck off

>> No.18655256

Take some time away from the screen, the memes have gotten to you.

>> No.18655270

I'm planning what to do after publishing my novel but I haven't even started writing it

>> No.18655405

Check out Hemingwayapp.com to cut down on some of the wordiness of the novel. It might make it easier for you to get the story across. Good work so far anon.

>> No.18655507

Stop daydreaming, and write that mf.

>> No.18655682

Commas are the only right choice here for proper reading

>> No.18655774

Yeah i guess i should just skip the vegetation completely in that part. But thanks for the heads up on it sounding ridiculous. ESL here, just trying to translate some of my shit into english so i can contribute with my own stuff in these threads. And for the record - ESL should in almost all cases stick to their first language.

>> No.18655950

That’s an example of asyndeton. So use commas.

>> No.18656040

redpill me about personalized websites

>> No.18656122

Don’t put your phone or email up like I did, it only gets spam.

>> No.18656243

I did use it once but I didn't like how it doesn't suggest words like Grammarly and Gdocs does, only omit adverbs.

>> No.18656571
File: 107 KB, 500x357, 1614959267074.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Have characters and some setpieces
>beyond one or two vague things, no real plot
What should I do here?

>> No.18656581

>hey guys I'm making progress in my writing
>heh, you take pleasure in seeing the progress of your writing? that's nothing more than numbers, a false impression of completeness
>posturing? u-uh ha ha well actually you're posturing
don't be so weird dude

>> No.18656609

>Post your entire book so far right now
That's you, you realise how retarded you sound?

>> No.18656622


>> No.18656627

So its nothing but empty posturing

>> No.18656644

>he lurks on /wg/ to pull people down whenever someone shows evidence of writing

>> No.18656652

Mhm, I'm just a bit worried about, or afraid of losing the string as it goes to the point it might as well be ramblings, but that's a matter of skill, so thanks.

>> No.18656797

Is this general also for improving handwriting?

>> No.18656811

no but penmanship is based

>> No.18657030

So, i finally got the review of my script back from a proffessional editor. Basically all it said was what i was expecting and hoping for them to say. I really didn't get any feedback that i wasn't expecting, which means i have succeeded in creating what i wanted. The only thing i wasn't expecting was the person's opinion about my ending. They said it was among the more original things they'd read. That felt good, i must admit.

So this is it. I'm now heading into the preparing the script for the printing and self publishing part of the process. I already have an artist working on the cover, i'll have the proof reader go over the text one final time and then i'll be contacting printing services that are offering print on demand.
Wish me luck!

[/spoiler] and no, i will never post it here or let it be known that i'm a 4chan tard. There's too much bad shit associated with this site and i don't want people to get the wrong idea. I will hint at it but never admit it. We are all going to make it.[/spoiler]

Captcha: MVPRR

Yeah man, i feel like the mvp right now. Wait... is this a hint that i should post it on Royal Road? Fuck me...

>> No.18657035

oh fuck i fucked up the spoiler part. Whatever, i'm tired.

>> No.18657103

Yes, anon, because showing a bunch of numbers is writing.

>> No.18657230

Chapter following one I posted weeks ago. Let me know what you guys think.


>> No.18657248

>Error, this is a private paste or is pending moderation. If this paste belongs to you, please login to Pastebin to view it.

>> No.18657250

silly boy

>> No.18657252

Those numbers lead to a book...

>> No.18657259

hes a schizophrenic pseud
no doubt all sorts of astounding mental gymnastics are going on to excuse the idea that writing results in word count going up

>> No.18657299

Everything is a federal fucking issue.

>> No.18657308

Blogs were seen as the castle in sky of what people will replace newspapers and magazines. Got murdered by social media sites. You are free to post anything you want to a personal blog site don't expect a massive fanbase. In my time of using one it was for putting up research articles for fun.

>> No.18657319
File: 1.86 MB, 4032x3024, 50690F8A-E087-410C-BE0A-07EB24AE2252.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Being a schizoid can be awesome!

Whatever happened to encouraging others and being supportive?

>> No.18657341

There's "offensive content" somehow, so I can't make it public. I guess use this password if you want to take a look:


>> No.18657355

yeah pastebin is pozzed now
don't really know what a good alternative is

>> No.18657365

Seriously. I couldn't believe it. I don't even think there's a curse word.

>> No.18657385

Mindless positivity is not a help. Sometimes things need to be reformed, not merely praised. Personally I’d much rather have someone be honest and critical with me than blindly appraising. You must be pretty immature to think that there is only one accepted response to you work and all others are just people being mean. Inculcate some nuance into your thinking

>> No.18657401

look at that fucking hack job— the bottom of the book is frayed as shit.
I want to commend you on believing dude, but I think you’re believing a little too hard. Might be time to slow down and look for the advice of someone with more skill than you

>> No.18657412

yeah you go girl
fight the good fight, make sure no one but the most prestigious book binders use a home book binder

>> No.18657420

>false dichotomy
Not the issue at all, just shows you’re a fucking toddler.
Your book is torn the fuck up— do you take pride in your work or is done good enough? I think I already know your answer

>> No.18657438

This is why you will never be a writer.

>> No.18657449

holy pseud. not only accusing posts on a sheep skin binding thread of informal fallacies but using them incorrectly. a false dichotomy requires a cause and effect divergence between two exhaustive options
at worst you could accuse me of a logical extreme
it's an at home book binding. who cares, I'm sure he's just giving a copy to his parents or something
find a different hill to die on in defense of the merit of labor

>> No.18657456

looks like when a kindergartens tears their construction paper with their hands instead of using safety scissors. It makes you appreciate Amazon's third world workers making their own perfect binding books

>> No.18657460

god damn you are fucking stupid.
It’s only frustrating because while you’re out giving your shoddily crafted dreck to actual drunks and potheads, having a big silly old time, your kid is growing up with an absolute joke of a father. really hope you grow up soon.

>> No.18657464

>He thinks he actually has a child.

>> No.18657478

I'm pretty sure he's larping as a father. How can a person be the head of a family and still leave so many butthurt replies on 4chan crying about how people aren't supportive of you or whatever he's complaining about. It's not only on /wg/ either, he posts on other threads and makes his own threads about his printing press and Amazon bad

>> No.18657481

He's an attentionwhore. Short and simple.

>> No.18657483
File: 118 KB, 883x773, xzmS7Fr.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>it's a crab episode
It's what you get for posting anything other than writing, questions and crits
As soon as you get the slightest bit off topic the pseuds who spend more time shit posting than writing crawl out of the wood work. I guess it's less shameful to be vitriolic when their pseud persona is crafted around the aesthetics of writing and not the process of completing a book

I wrote a short story yesterday but couldn't get pastebin to work. Here's the opening

>> No.18657489

That book is an early one, my latest ones are looking better BUT the 40c+ heat wave for 3 days we had seems to have made my glue go bad. I have some more coming in the mail!

>> No.18657495

How are they crab? The anon >>18657401 is literally giving him advice on how to improve and he just ignores it.

>> No.18657496

If he's a ngmi market slave trying to advertise on 4ch of all places then why are you feeding (you)s?

>> No.18657503

Because he might kill himself otherwise? Guy dropped thousand of dollars just so he could live his delusion. Clearly not the most stable person.

>> No.18657504

I think he’s fucking serious. I guess we’ll never know but from the way he thinks he really is a genuine fucking lazy moron, and that hasn’t stopped some people from still breeding
I don’t know, I guess I just imagine deception is a little too advanced for him,

>> No.18657506

While I'm giving out shitty books to low-income earners, what exactly are YOU doing with your life?

I'm having a great time. I'm creating and living as an artist. Feels good man!

>> No.18657509

It's a bit of a stretch to say that
>look for the advice of someone with more skill than you
is giving advice on how to improve
It's pretty much all just shit slinging. But if he is just trying to advertise then fuck him I guess
It's one thing to celebrate each others successes and give advice/discuss but shilling is a bit foul

>> No.18657526

I’m taking care of my loved ones and writing with the intent to reach people broadly, not just shove a sweaty pamphlet into the hands of a disninterested drunk.

The advice is give a damn about your work. Jason talks all the time as if he were some noble figure busting his ass, when in actuality he has no job and probably spent someone else’s money on equipment to produce ripped up junk. It’s insulting desu. How can you advise someone so up-their-own-ass without being direct? Any sympathy you show him he’ll think you’re praising him and confuse it all

>> No.18657537

Clearly I don't lurk enough. Some new resident schizo or something? You guys are all acting like he's a regular character
Kind of wanted feedback on my writing but I guess thread soap opera is good too

>> No.18657548

>Kind of wanted feedback on my writing
then coming to /wg/ is the wrong place.

>> No.18657554

>O, the fall of /wg/!
Oh fuck off with this. I'm not a chronic poster but I check often enough to see that /wg/ is pretty much the same as it's always been
Last thread had plenty of excerpts and discussion

>> No.18657562

>Being this delusional

>> No.18657577

What even prompts an anon to post
>/wg/ is SHIT
Every single thread. Obviously there's gonna be dumbass proponents, it is a chan after all. The crabs, the pseuds, the overly confident newfag, the thread doomsayers

>> No.18657581
File: 877 KB, 3219x2109, schizo.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I've been living as an artist for 15 years, I know what I'm doing!

>> No.18657587

>The crabs,
In the minds of people who receive critique they don't like.

>the pseuds
The main reason why /wg/ is dying.

>the overly confident newfag
Part of the pseuds

>the thread doomsayers
People telling the truth.

>> No.18657600

There are normal anons who post their writing, pose their questions and discuss between these. This is done out of an interest in writing
What could possibly compel you to want to constantly spout this pointless drivel

>> No.18657609

And here’s, perhaps the worst of the bunch, the denialist. He knows /wg/ is dying, but refuses to believe it. For what, reason? Nobody knows.

>> No.18657611
File: 457 KB, 2048x1365, 256709_10152376259715514_1615648039_o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Care to show off any of your work? Projects?


Trailer I wrote and hired a film crew for:

Please, share with /wg/ your progress in what you've been doing?

>> No.18657636
File: 1.26 MB, 640x480, 1624684554654.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

/wg/ is getting better and better because the crabs who pull others down are being revealed for what they are:
>"i'll write my book someday, anon, and my writing is better than yours"
>blind hate on others' writing in bad faith

Luckily there are bipolar maniac schizos like me who are impervious to your demoralizing effects. Let's fucking do this, writers and authors of /Lit/, we're going to keep writing, keep producing, and get our fucking self-expressed books out into the world and there is NOTHING the pseuds and non-producers of /Lit/ can do about it other than cry like bitches about how horrible our writing is.

>> No.18657640

>he tricked me into perpetuating his non-discussion
An expert at his trade. All the hours spent shit-posting instead of writing have truly paid off
I had intended themes of being bound by your nature when I started writing but had trouble pulling it together moment by moment. After finishing and sleeping on it it's easy to see how I could have incorporated it better
It's only a 2.5k word short story that I rushed through to finish before bed but this experience has reinforced my conclusion that you don't start writing a story until you've finished it once

>> No.18657648
File: 92 KB, 752x835, fewrit.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Would love to hear some criticism.
This is from the perspective of an autistic guy writing about his memory of an old girlfriend, his first love. Trying to capture the kaleidoscopic way in which we relate to memories, rather than the memories themselves. People in this world love dairy, hence the dairy restaurant. Brutal criticism welcome, as long as their is substance behind it.
BTW I am well aware that this section balances a fine line upon sounding cringe and full of shit.

>> No.18657649

Drafts are like whiskey, the longer you let it age and re-visit it, the better you can make it. Don't be a perfectionist, though, get to a point where you can release it and start the next book ASAP.

Never stop writing and living as the artist you are.

>> No.18657655

It's shit.

>> No.18657657


>> No.18657668


>> No.18657671

I like it! Made me hungry... first paragraph's end about the childishness... does the character revisit his regret?

2nd paragraph, 3rd sentence... feels a bit long but it does fit within the style! Nice work anon, go go go!!!

>> No.18657675

Ignore. Bad faith actor.

>> No.18657681

why are you making trailers for your own book, and why are you posting it here? It’s really hard to see any of this as something other than a plea for praise. Does the subject of your work even matter, or is it just about putting something out? Can’t believe I have to explain that quantity /= quality to an adult…

Also, since you’re all over google, what the fuck is switching teams? Are you writing gay porn? Also it looks like you write kids books with your sister, is that something you’re passionate about or is it just another grift?

>> No.18657687

Not him, but do a bit of research for people with autism and how they write if you’re writing a autistic MC. Otherwise the excerpt about writing from the perspective of an autistic guy, is shit.

>> No.18657701

Thank you anon. I try to revisit it more generally in the sense that the main character is constantly and anxiously questioning the way he relates to other people.
Thanks for the comments, I am indeed trying to cut down that sentence (and others). Wanted to take a more ambitious and experimental approach in my first draft before I trim down. I appreciate your helpful comments.

>> No.18657714
File: 2.82 MB, 5472x3648, 50bmw.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Hahaha... those gay porn books and other books are not mine... hahahaha, I laughed so hard when I saw them. Geez Louise...

My book in 2013 came true, people are more lonely and single than ever before, the dating market's well has been poisoned so thoroughly. I could see it coming as I was having so much sex with so many women and the ways in which we USED to date and court each other had been completely obliterated by the smartphone. I'm 43 and old enough to have witnessed the golden age of Canada in the 90's and 00's, and now in 2021, life is 100 times worse and more difficult for the majority of youth than the paradise I grew up in...

>> No.18657719

Fair enough. Good point. I should mention that the reader is never explicitly informed that he is autistic or mentally ill. I try to infer this from the way in which he relates to the outer world, so good point and thanks for the feedback

>> No.18657723

Bro if you're ever feeling shitty and need some friendly, positive advice from a GOOD FAITH actor, you can email me through my website at jason-bryan.com and I'll be sure to get back to you and offer some support. /Lit/ has become a place that actively chases writers and authors away. I really enjoyed your writing.

>> No.18657725

non-discussion hours. don't reply to retards
that being said it's hard to say anything about this. what's the point of this piece? it's an empty vignette but the prose isn't evocative. the styling seems to be an awkward aping of romantic aesthetics. I'm not getting any impression of the characters autism, just an impression of a meandering and vapid writer
it seems as if you think that you can write an interesting, obsessive character by listing things and events as though it were their obsessive thoughts going over these pointless details
what you're missing is the age old meme. show, don't tell. there is no depiction of his fixations. he doesn't contemplate the aromas and manufacturing of cheese and its implications. he doesn't give any opinions
it's pretty bad but don't be discouraged

>> No.18657727

Now we know you're just an attentionwhore.

>> No.18657741

I can definitely tell you are not an artist!

>> No.18657742

>apes my verbiage when I gmi post
you're not a good faith actor. you're a hollow, soulless shill who's intentions are not sincere to your persona of helping others
anons writing is pretty damn near irrefutably bad. he gains nothing by you coddling him. he gains nothing by you pimping your site
fuck off

>> No.18657752

I can definitely tell you are not an artist!

>> No.18657753

Contemplating the aromas and manufacturing of the cheese seems like pseud filler to me. The focus, to me, is the character's examination of the scene and what lead to things going so wrong for his relationship. How does the way the cheese is made tell anything about that story? It doesn't.

>> No.18657759
File: 1.21 MB, 2316x3088, IMG_5730.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I'm going to keep offering praise and support to fellow writers and you will do nothing but cry like a bitch and never post your own shit.

>> No.18657760

Is Dylan Durret a pen name of yours, or some entirely different retard?

>> No.18657766

And you will put out trash, because you lack the depth to improve. Sorry.

>> No.18657770

I'm taking you in good faith here but just in case lets chill and establish that I'm not out to get you or anything alright? don't go on meltdown
what it contributes to is the characterization. you say you want to write it from the perspective of an autistic character but you haven't characterized. you say you want it to be dream like and evoke memories, but it's not disjointed or fixated on character significant details
take a deep breath before you get insulted over crit. I'm gonna be fucking pissed if, after I tried to help you, you newfag shit all over because you think your writing is better than it is

>> No.18657780

There are 14,000 McDonald's operating in the USA.

50 Shades of Grey was a monster hit.

This video has nearly 8 million views:

You are a complete fucking pseud and you produce nothing. You are a nobody. You do not contribute.

If writers here can put out what you call "shit" and still earn a living as an artist, it will eat your soul up inside that YOU don't believe in yourself enough to produce ANYTHING.

>> No.18657781

How can you help me if you misconstrue the most important part?

>> No.18657783

fuck you

>> No.18657785

Thanks for the criticism. I must admit that (and this is no excuse for a poor section of writing) it does make more sense in connection to the other parts of the book, both in terms of style and content.
I particularly agree with this notion of meandering - sometimes this is purposeful, but indeed should be cut down and given more focus.
However I do not quite agree with the final part - I am telling barely anything about their holiday together. Instead, I am trying to show how the main character relates to these important memories by telling only fragments of his experience with this girl, which can be pieced together by the reader from their own similar experiences.
Thanks for the comments anon.

>> No.18657787
File: 42 KB, 336x499, 519rKU1oeiL._SX334_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Who the fuck thinks writing needs to even be good???

Have you fucking SEEN the other shit in other mediums? Absolute fucking trash.

Have you read this shit book? Fucking Obama endorsed it and I couldn't make it through it without falling asleep every single time.

>> No.18657789

You DO NOT produce enough to earn a living. You produce artifacts of your own ill-deserved vanity, and when called out you refer to this measure of quantity as if it means a damn. Not to mention you’re actually going to refer to McDonald, and fifty shades as things to emulate.
Grow the fuck up you stupid child.

>> No.18657790

Your shit is pretty good anon, just remember there are many people on /Lit/ and in /wg/ that exist to try and force you to give up. They are so blackpilled themselves that they must drag people down to their level. Just look above at one of the replies "It's shit."

>> No.18657795

I have a job. I care about my hobbies because it's what I choose to do with myself
if you were serious on pursuing writing financially you would be networking circles that are also pursuing that
/wg/ is for the discussion of writing itself, not the selling of writing

>> No.18657797

Thank you anon

>> No.18657800

Oh my gosh this fucking post again— this is you Jason?
Fuck you are so goddamned stupid you can’t even shill with any subtlety. Fucking kys

>> No.18657801

>It's shit."
And he explain why its shit to begin with. Since the MC doesn't read autistic. Which defeats the purpose of the excerpt.

>> No.18657808

>am I so out of touch?
>no, it’s the entire world who is wrong
Seek help, Jason

>> No.18657810

Dude I'm going to be posting the money I make from The Shitkickers when I release it and promote it and you will cry like such a fucking little bitch faggot. I am going to laugh so hard when my 3rd book is released and you are still telling me "you're not an author" when I'll be living off book sales eventually.

I figured out how to make 10k a month selling porn online for 1 hour a day, I'm sure I can figure out how to make 2-3k a month selling books to survive in the short term.

Life is an adventure. Don't be angry that you have never lived.

>> No.18657811

Thank you friend. I appreciate it.

>> No.18657812

you're not helping
autism anon is already leagues ahead of you as a writer because he's able to discern what is being offered by a crit and not just shit himself at the idea of conflict
I'd argue his writing is weak but if he's confident and aware of the qualities I think are bad then there has to be some unity of intentions and execution. not to say his writing isn't piss boring but hey, still better than you

>> No.18657816

I've been to Writer's Fests and immersed myself in the "culture of writing" in Vancouver and it is 100% pozzed as fuck. Everything is LGBT, black, indigenous, trans, refugee, femoid shit... there are ZERO bros who write in this city and I will be happy to be the first one who stuck with it and kept putting out work.

Feels good to complete a project. Do you know that feeling, anon?

>> No.18657820

People WANT porn you fucking moron, did you really not consider that?
Jfc you have serious mental illness, please surrender your child to the authorities

>> No.18657824

you absolute dumb fuck. you're able to realize that the industry is corrupt and doesn't value quality writing and yet you still conflate the quality of a books value with how much money it makes
think you stupid fuck THINK

>> No.18657827

Feels better to make something actually good, but you wouldn’t really understand

>> No.18657829

Living the way I do:
>fucked 100+ hot women
>drove and owned nearly every fast car I've wanted
>only wagie cagie'd for 2 years in my life since 2001
>have reproduced with woman with wealthy family
>43 years old and still pushing forward in life

Seek adventure, anon

>> No.18657833

Please PLEASE post the money you make on /lit/
I want to know what 15$ looks like in gay Canadian money lol

>> No.18657836

Writing doesn't need to be "good" for pseuds on here, it just needs to entertain and sell.

>> No.18657839

Not that I expect some long essay here, but can you let me know what I could do to make it less boring and more captivating for the reader? I know that I am meandering and that is sometimes the point but being a boring writer imo is the worst trap I could fall into.
Do you think that this section would be different in your mind if you really cared for the main character beforehand?

>> No.18657843

I do think, it is called "write and sell books to make the haters mad"

>> No.18657847

>bragging about getting pussy on an anonymous forum for kids
lol jfc you must have a tiny cock to be this insecure. Also I love how it really isn’t about the writing for you, it’s about adventure. Sticking your cock in a bunch of hookers is a fucking lame adventure bro, I’m sure that’s how you ended up with the kid hahaha

>> No.18657854

So far, one based liquorstore bro handed me $20 for my book and he only read so far to page 215. He loves Mistress S, haha...

>> No.18657857

It’s needs to be good for your readers
God you are a fucking revolting narcissistic fuck. Also looking at your ‘art’ on the internet you wouldn’t know talent if it raped your ass

>> No.18657869
File: 1016 KB, 2048x1536, scar7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I have never banged a hooker, all good women with no tattoos.

When you live as a self-expressing artist, women are drawn to you. This is a fact. I put zero effort into living traditionally and I was rewarded by getting showered in pussy. The only downside is that I never purchased property so the easy route to wealth has passed me by. That's fine, because the easy route is boooooring!

You know what isn't boring? Driving a big single turbo Supra on your way to fuck some hot chick!

>> No.18657870

Wow twenty dollars, you sure are impressive big time author man.
Stick to the gay porn, jas

>> No.18657875

Cry harder! Hope you email me for a free paperback copy of my book and review it.

Have a nice day!

>> No.18657879

More money than you make off your self-expression, hahaha!

>> No.18657880

You will never be an artist, no matter how much money you spend on equipment and how much time you waste and fiddling with it. You are what art is meant to erase from the universe: that without soul or introspection.

>> No.18657885

Only the smallest men measure themselves in dollars

Also no, I just sold an article for a couple hundred bucks. Sorry Jason. :(

>> No.18657888

Not crying nearly as hard as your kid when he realizes his dad is a fucking useless faggot.
Honestly I feel bad for the little nigga.

>> No.18657891
File: 176 KB, 1920x1280, 1624730009474.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Funny, the 1st book is 100% about introspection and it lead me away from the cocaine and hookup lifestyle. I was able to find a high quality woman and have a wonderful, super happy kid due to the process of introspection that lead to the 1st book.

You don't even HAVE a book released. You don't even HAVE anything to show that you've produced.

>> No.18657907

Let's read the article!

>> No.18657910

What the fuck is happening in this god damn thread

>> No.18657911

I enjoy effort posting and trying to bring up the quality of discourse around here, assuming that the person looking for help doesn't have crippling personality problems that make them insufferable
my first impression of this excerpt was "what's the point?" and I think addressing this feeling will help the readability. if I've gathered correctly your intentions are to convey the way people relate to memories using the universal experience of a first love? assuming that's the case, I think you've pretty much done the exact opposite of what you should have to achieve this effect. you're putting so much emphasis on the drawing on the scene and not the experience, which I assumed was because the perspective voice is autistic. when I recall my first love I think about how beautiful the girl was, her pale skin, dark hair, the startling realization that she held eye contact with me longer than anyone else would. I know, intellectually, that the couch we first kissed on was uncomfortable but when I recall the memory I don't think about that. I don't think about the room, the food, or whatever. I think about her
disjunction sells the abstract way we process dreams and memories. sudden, intrusive thoughts. change in tone at a mental connection. long fixations on seemingly minor details that are significant to the person

overrall it suffers from a lack of communicated purpose. the prose is repetitive and tiring as well, which would be okay if it were exceptionally well executed but the style you're going for is hard to pull off. it'd take quite a bit of skill to make this interesting on prose alone
I'd recommend reading but I don't read much romance. gl anon, you seem to have the right attitude. it's a lot to ask but I'd appreciate it if you could pay effort posting forward and crit anons from time to time. /wg/ is comfy when the shitposters and shizos are drowned out in actual discussion

>> No.18657915

Lol you don’t know what I’ve released because I don’t bring my work to 4chan to make myself feel like a big man (mainly because that’s pathetic and you’d have to be a fucking loser to actually feel good about that) and you hardly produced anything, the only thing stopping any related from doing what you did is a sense of integrity and a desire to actually be respected and a producer of quality. If I give up all my standards, I could be you tomorrow without breaking a sweat.

>> No.18657938

But if your main criticism is 'What is the point?' then do you not think that relates more directly to the fact that I have chosen a short and relatively random extract from a much larger project without any explanation?
That is a good point though about the environment vs the girl, I will definitely bear that in mind.
I think you make some good points and I also agree that the style is very ambitous (although better reflected as a whole piece and not a short extract, not that it really matters here).
I have a long way to go but I think I will get there, especially thanks to the criticism I have recieved.

>> No.18657939
File: 319 KB, 2048x1152, 1622493_10155519687665514_3707685927848381024_o.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>desire to actually be respected and a producer of quality. If I give up all my standards,

There is a reason why there are 14,000 McDonald's open in the USA and it is not because of quality.

>I could be you tomorrow without breaking a sweat.

I guarantee you could not figure out how to follow my entire process from imagining, to writing, to editing, to cover design, to creating the PDF for printing, to printing, to chopping the book, to binding it without some serious frustrations in figuring out how I did it using simple tools and no adobe InDesign.

My method could be applied to an employee, and if I ever got that big, I could hire someone to easily crank out 10+ books an hour.

We'll see, right? That's the beauty of an adventurous life. I have no idea if I will be successful or not, but based on how I have lived my life, even if it is challenging, I will have a great time along the way!

And hey, if I inspire even one other /Lit/ person to self-publish and find their own success and happiness, awesome!

>> No.18657941

This fucking thread, I swear.
Anyway fellow /wg/ anons a few threads ago I meme'd about having a protagonist that suffers from chronic-pain, since then I decided to expand upon it and here's what I got.
>born premature.
>has shit lungs so he can't go outside for long.
>was pretty much raised in small shoebox apartments because he lived with his single teen mom in Toronto.
>also has a tulpa that's an idealized version of himself that loves and comforts him.

Got a feel this can be a good tragedy but it... needs refinement.
Some /mu/ cause why the hell not.

>> No.18657953

this excerpt itself doesn't communicate much meaning which is all I can give feedback on
you shouldn't overthink moment to moment writing but at the same time you mostly want to avoid any segment from being too weak stand on its own
trust your gut anon. I'm sure you'll do fine, I look forward to your future writings

>> No.18657954

> There is a reason why there are 14,000 McDonald's open in the USA and it is not because of quality.
That’s a good start, but now I want you to consider what people want more: cheap food, or a shitty book. Think real hard on this one.

As for the rest. Yeah I guarantee you with no hesitation I could replicate your unremarkable ouvre while I took a shit.
Pretty laughable how you describe an assembly line method for pumping out books as a good thing, or even as something someone would actually want.

You are so out of touch it’s un fucking real.

>> No.18657966

also, since it's clear you really are a 43 year old learned about this site a week ago, you might want to avoid putting all this personal identifying info on 4chan?

>> No.18657974

we're no longer in the age of the internet being predominantly used by sociopathic university nerds with nothing to lose
don't expect him to get much retribution for being an annoying, self centered shill
'get with the culture or get out' is something I miss. shame mods are just glorified jannies. it'd be nice if retards who did nothing but shill and shitpost were banned

>> No.18657976
File: 1.22 MB, 3217x2079, fun-house.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I have literally been on 4chan since like 2003 or 2004.

>> No.18657988

I don't know... I know someone compiled a list of F Gardner's contact info for him and his family. don't know if anyone actually harrassed them, but I know people were getting banned for collecting and posting the info.
no you haven't, lol. you capitalize /lit/, you are the newest of the new. I bet you just looked up the founding year for the site to make this post, haha

>> No.18657999

holy shit, I'm reading the comments on your 'film trailer' and you're just as much of a butthurt faggot irl too
it's mostly just you getting pissed off as people tell you you need to get a thicker skin if you're going to make it, fucking christ you are a sad fuck.

>> No.18658006
File: 1.59 MB, 1024x752, 1622963854243.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>Cheap food or a shitty book?
Well, they don't know it is shitty until they read it. People at the liquor store I've given the book to love it! People will see it as an alternative to the completely pozzed entertainment industry that has simply recycled the same shit over and over while putting IDpol above storytelling.
>I could replicate your unremarkable ouvre
Definitely not, you have no lived a wild life and you do not know Vancouver. You are as pedestrian and NPC as they come!
>Assembly line method for pimping out books
I guess Amazon and Lulu use ancient chinese masters of book binding that do everything by hand? Let me guess, you think it is a bad thing cars are made by robots?
I can print the books for $1 in costs, try finding out how much print-on-demand would charge you for printing 100 of your books and then ship them to your house. That cuts into your profits BIG TIME.
What do you sell? Do you create anything you can show here?

>> No.18658012

The 1st book worked out great in my life, I have no regrets.

>> No.18658014
File: 1.59 MB, 3217x2079, 1626384786445.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

Is that DFW in the background?

>> No.18658016
File: 16 KB, 396x385, 1601839023285.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>wrote a chapter today
we're all gonna fucking make it bros

>> No.18658019

>Well, they don't know it is shitty until they read it.
HAAHAAHAHAAHAA holy fuck, the eternal grifter shows his true colors and is too stupid to realize it.
Fuck of Jason, I’m not impressed, threatened or even entertained by you. Get a real job and feed your fucking kid.

>> No.18658020

Dude I found this place after being griefed by SA goons in Battlefield Vietnam

>> No.18658021

>People at the liquor store I've given the book to love it!
what the fuck hahaha you're insane
as a fellow leaf you should keep your head down a little more. you're luck that you're not out west, some vietnamese skinhead would stab your dumbass for this retarded behavior

>> No.18658026

bit by bit fren

>> No.18658030
File: 2.62 MB, 2336x3504, IMG_1008 (2).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

That was me in my long hair, don't care days.
>long hair > short hair

>> No.18658038

That’s because you are insipid and arrogant. I bet ‘no ragerts’ is the attitude you have towards a lot of your obvious mistakes.

>> No.18658043

You probably don't know what it is like to be 6'3 and 240 lbs, not many people pick fights with you. If someone does, you sucker punch them before they even have a chance to defend themselves.

>> No.18658046

Dude wow bro lying on the internet is poggers!

>> No.18658050

God men, I'm so giddy. I cant believe people are actually reading my shitty work. Now I just need to focus that on writing more chapters

>> No.18658051

Love the veiled internet tough guy act. You must be one insecure hombre.

>> No.18658052

You have to make mistakes in life to succeed. You cannot win without losing sometimes. That is just the balance of life.

If you're afraid of the shame and pressure from people laughing at your misfortunes, is it more noble to simply not try, or do you pick yourself up off the ground and keep trying?

The people here are so self-defeated that many of you could not even recognize if you even have any talent and you're too afraid of words on a screen to even try and self-express. If a 43 year old like me can still push ahead in life, what's stopping a bro in his early 20's, other than self-doubt?

>> No.18658054

you're a stupid fruit who's either retarded or hasn't lived the life he claims
vietnamese don't get very big. they also don't give a fuck, especially if you're a white guy
seriously, stop hassling folks on the streets

>> No.18658061

I’m only afraid of being like you, desu: unreachable. Overflowing with obvious, childish flaws but unable to introspect enough to actually move forward. Thank Christ I am not you

>> No.18658065

>is still perpetuating his need for attention
Anon I believe you but you're not showing much maturity right now

>> No.18658075

>perpetuating need for attention
what does this even mean? You’re saying because I keep posting? If so, yea I’m bored at work, I like to shitpost. You have a godawful way with words. Like, characteristically terrible. Maybe that could be your thing: being a fucking incomprehensible moron, could be worth a shot, you’re already qualified

>> No.18658079

As I said, I was a cocaine using womanizer until my 1st book. I am now a loving father and I would never do drugs, other than a sativa doobie, again. I have no desire to return to my previous lifestyle, nor sell porn anymore, I want to encourage other young-at-heart people to pursue their goals and don't let their memes be dreams.

I see this forum full of people who want to make their way in this world, and, hopefully, my rawness and delusional idea that a washed up hack like me can believe in himself that they too, can develop the internal tools necessary to advance towards their goals despite all of the hardships and obstacles in their way.

If I can do it, so can you!

>> No.18658085

Doubt it when you're spending money on useless shit just to perpetuate your delusions.

>> No.18658087

As I said: unreachable. Overconfident. Ultimately very very boring.

>> No.18658090

I'd be worried punching one of those guys because I could easily KO them in one punch, if they fall, hit their head and get seriously injured, my life could be seriously fucked as a result. Still, not scared, I have been in street brawls in the DTES before and I found it hilarious.

>> No.18658094

Chill with the schizophrenia. I'm not the retard
>I can shit up the thread if I want to
Yes, you can. But you're keeping him here and pushing off-topic discussion instead of on-topic. There've been excerpts posted, reply to one of those
If you want to go full brainless vegetable at work just scrool social media or a different thread, there's no reason for you to bring down this one

>> No.18658098

>be me
>write two books
>"oh you're delusional anon"
>be me
>put on a dress call myself a woman
>"you are a stunning and brave woman!"
One man's delusion is another man's reality I suppose

>> No.18658110

liar. this tough guy act doesn't fool anyone who's grown up and lived around people that are actually threatening
you don't fuck with scary looking vietnamese because a lot of the older ones were in gangs and the younger ones are just violent drug addicts
there is literally nothing to be gained other than losing your life by hassling strangers

>> No.18658113
File: 6 KB, 225x225, fucks sake.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>people still falling for LARP troll bait.
>tfw hide post exists.
>tfw report post exists.
This thread is turning to absolute shit. The last good posts were
and >>18657648
Ignore the fucking troll already, holy fuck.

>> No.18658118

>giving away a book
>hassling strangers

>> No.18658119

This thread is about improving our craft. We’re trying to exorcise his demon and help him. Have some pity on the poor old queen

>> No.18658120

>meta post on how shit the thread is
Right over your head. Read mine >>18657483

>> No.18658124

just a symptom of a dying general.

>> No.18658126

yes. you are so naive and I hope you pay for it one day

>> No.18658142

Honestly I think Jason's got a very fair point about following dreams and working hard, etc. The only thing worth debating is the approach to criticism ITT which is either A., scathing and meant to drive off weaker-skinned anons despite the fact that you can lose the message of the piece in the criticism, or B., hugbox and gentle which can impress upon anons that the criticism is a mere suggestion or a stylistic choice.

>> No.18658156

fuck you, I put effort into most of my crits and I know that I'm not the only one who does
you shouldn't be either and be honest about thinking through and trying to find weaknesses and flaws in the writing. it's not a crit if you just say it's shit or it's good

>> No.18658163

the innate benefit to this place is the anonynimity. sure people use it to be cruel, but their cruelty has no lasting effect on a persons ego-- it won't follow them, and can't even be traced back to the subject. if you're mature, this is the best place to take the criticism, and sift through it at a removed distance and jduge for yourself what to take seriously and what not to

Jason is just making excuses. he's a narcisist. he posts about himself, his 'accomplishments' his life. he doesn't want input he wants praise, and when you offer anything but he reverts to this kind of smarmy positivism, or literally just talking about how much he's fucked.

the point may be a good one, but Jason wields it superficially. he doesn't mean it, it only offers a temporary cover for him, and I don't want him to have that considering his problem is his cognitive dissonance.

>> No.18658212

>you shouldn't be either and be honest about thinking through and trying to find weaknesses and flaws in the writing. it's not a crit if you just say it's shit or it's good
That's my point though. The approach to criticism in these threads is almost always A or B. Boundless positivity like Jason's is uplifting, sure, but it's damaging in the long run because there's no improvement made. Encouragement is important, but metered encouragement, not "Good job buddy!" when anything is posted regardless of quality.
I feel like his original intent showing up to these threads was to drown the perceived jaded negativity of criticisms with overwhelming positivity, when in reality the "negative criticism" is either shitposting or just fatigue at seeing the same forced prose a hundred times over. Sometimes it really does help to be reminded that a work isn't written and finished overnight, but being lauded with praise at all times is not healthy. It stifles improvement much like solely negative feedback stifles improvement.
I agree. Here I'd put something like we're all gonna make it, but in context, I don't feel like it anymore

>> No.18658220

>Jason's got a very fair point about following dreams and working hard, etc.
And that's new? Everyone on a optimistic day is like that in their head. Not to mention we take it for granted because "holy shit, somebody is actually being nice on /wg/ for once!"
>The only thing worth debating is the approach to criticism ITT which is either A., scathing and meant to drive off weaker-skinned anons despite the fact that you can lose the message of the piece in the criticism, or B., hugbox and gentle which can impress upon anons that the criticism is a mere suggestion or a stylistic choice.
Ironically, taking in what >>18658163 said, this is the best place for criticism to actually take root. The anonymity allows people to actually speak out in their full uncensored and raw opinion, harsh insults about ones work help feeds the pressure that the general creates. It's something similar to evolutionary pressure, survive and you improve, if you don't then you're ngmi.

>> No.18658235

>The approach to criticism in these threads is almost always A or B
and my point is that this isn't the case. in this very thread there's a 1:1 ratio of effort crit to the kind you're proposing as dominant
the truth is that most of the lazy crit comes from non-readers and non-writers and so they're transparent in their pointlessness. most of the people in thread who don't read or write don't read excerpts and so don't give shitty crits

>> No.18658245

You're being silly. I want input. Why do you think I keep offering to send paperback copies to people here for review? Just drop me a line on my website and I will notify you guys when the glue issue is solved and I start sending them out. I apologize for being a narcissistic maniac, it is a product of a lifetime of being raised to "just be yourself." I am myself, and it is abrasive.

>> No.18658247

>halfway through The Darkness That Comes Before
>realize the novel I've just spent 3 months writing is absolute shit compared to this
I'm not gonna make it.

>> No.18658257

don't reply to him

>> No.18658262

You need help.

>> No.18658264

stop spending so long and just get it done then
obviously you're ngmi if you try to make every shitty little thing you write your lifes work

>> No.18658265

This but Tender is the Night. Every time I read Fitzgerald I'm reminded about why This Side of Paradise was my first real novel love.

>> No.18658279

As long as it doesn't have any cuckshit, its an improvment.

>> No.18658283

Confederacy of Dunces wasn't even released until a decade after the author offed himself... The reviews are extremely polarized. A ton of people give it 5 stars while others rip into how horrible and shitty the book is with 1-star reviews about how they didn't even laugh once and cannot understand how someone could enjoy the fucking terrible and juvenile story that has no plot.

>> No.18658292

>Why do you think I keep offering to send paperback copies to people here for review?
because you want follower/sycophants

and you're not abrasive, you're a narcisist. >>18658262 this person is trying to help you

>> No.18658300

your book is nothing like confederacy of dunces. how is the a useful metaphor, and not simply just a veiled self-apparaisal.
seriously, seek help. get therapy. just shut the fuck up and listen for two seconds. do something other than what you keep telling yourself is a really cool thing to do, because you're wrong.

>> No.18658302

Narcissism is a prerequisite for good art


>> No.18658312

necesary condition is not a sufficent condition. google that and fuck off.

>> No.18658313

>thread activity goes up as soon as the schizo posts
fucks sakes. posting on /wg/ is like trying to cultivate a writing group while baby sitting a whole classroom
sure you could just pretend like the children aren't all smearing their snot on the retarded one but then whoever looks in to discuss writing is gonna see a playground and leave

>> No.18658327

You keep saying I'm wrong, but I'm the one who has fucked 100+ chicks, driven all the cool cars, lived in fun places, filmed porn in Costa Rica, wrote two books...

Like most of the dudes here have not adventured through life, this is what gives me a diverse and dynamic life to pull stories and emotions from. If you don't throw caution to the wind, how will you ever know the limits of your ability to absorb failures and enjoy triumphs?

Have you ever produced any art, anon? Do you know what it is like to be living as an artist?

>> No.18658330

People actually use /wg/ to improve? I just go to a writer's forum.

>> No.18658334

>but I'm the one who has fucked 100+ chicks,
it's honestly hard to believe someone could post something like this unironically-- 'you may have a lot of good points but I have had sex'
you are one sad, small man, and your writing is always going to suffer from this.

>> No.18658335


Trust the science, anon!

>> No.18658339

Have you seen how many posts on here are young men lamenting the fact that they never had sex as a teen?

Have you been to /adv/ and seen how many incel threads there are? It is a fucking epidemic of loneliness out there and I fucking predicted it spot-on with "City of Singles"

>> No.18658340

I tried a couple of the forums recc'd here and they were both just ngmi market slaves trying to claw up on the networking ladder and talking past each other about how their stories have X appeal and will blow up and make them rich
forums aren't for people who want to improve at writing. they're for people with delusions of grandeur and think they deserve financial success

>> No.18658341

too stupid to even google the terms I just threw out at you?
you're hopeless Jason, but it seems like people have literally been telling you that for most of your life, judging by the comments on your videos.

>> No.18658345

what does this have to do with anything?
who are you talking to? yourself? no one has read nor cares about your book's 'predictions' or any of your other sick delusions.
honestly I'm tempted to call Canadian social services and try to get your kid taken away. he's fucked if he spends any time near you

>> No.18658348

canadian social services are absolute bloodhounds

>> No.18658350

>they're for people with delusions of grandeur and think they deserve financial success
Pretty sure that's /wg/

>> No.18658354

This is more or less the same reason I give when people I know IRL encourage me to join a writing Discord

>> No.18658358

I don't live with my kid, so good luck with that!

>> No.18658364

no fucking shit, you can barely take care of yourself. what I'm concerned about is he actually has to spend any time with you at all, learning from a failure who tells the world he's a success.
probably won't be too hard since I have your personal info, including your license plate number

>> No.18658367

You don't have a kid nor a wife, and you're mentally Ill since you're trying to appear successful to a bunch of failures on an anime imageboard.

>> No.18658371

pretty sure /wg/ has almost no networking because everyone but a couple shills are anonymous but yeah sure. dumb fuck. complaining about thread state isn't a personality
writing discords are hit or miss. I've been in good ones but they're usually small, invite only and end up dying
I don't know of a single public one that isn't either a newfag hugbox or thinly disguised social ponzi schemes
I wish that you didn't have to have personal friends who already are deeply invested in literature and writing to enjoy having a writing group

>> No.18658398

The biggest redpill about writing groups I ever took was from Cormac McCarthy's advice about never associating with other writers. I realize the irony of saying that here, on an imageboard filled with writers. But avoiding other writers and focusing on honing my craft and talking to beta readers about their responses to excerpts, blurbs, and whole books has honestly been a much more enjoyable if not a little lonely experience.
I do have a friend who is a major screenplay editor, and not like podunk screenplays made by college students, and her advice and direction toward media to consume has been very helpful over the years. I would hate to be still in the high school writing mindset I know some other writers I knew in high school still probably are, and I've been out for almost 7 years now.
tl;dr McCarthy says don't associate with other writers and it works

>> No.18658413

I have no doubt that it's good advice but fuck me if never discussing, sharing or critiquing isn't hell on my motivation

>> No.18658433
File: 255 KB, 1778x997, fent-heritage.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

I believe it. After chatting with the liquor store workers about my work and how much they enjoyed it, and some of the themes in it, it is super-motivating to hear their input. They're not telling me my tenses are so fucked, they're talking about how the crime and open drug use in Vancouver is completely over-the-top and only getting worse.

>> No.18658447

Failures? I find the people here to be awesome, many of them at least. I'd rather be surrounded by the "failures" here than the average Redditor of /r/writing. Being part of the counter-culture means we are all brothers and sisters in binds now. The mainstream does not want our art or messages to spread, yet we persist and we will never give up.

(Unlike you!)

>> No.18658457

I think Cormac hated the "Hollywood" response. When you're an actor trying to make it in Hollywood and you land a spot somewhere, all your actor friends don't give a fuck what it's about: they just want to know how you got it so they can duplicate your success. They couldn't care less about the show or movie or commercial. Maybe Cormac's just a fame jockey, idk.

>> No.18658480
File: 5 KB, 231x219, FUCKOFF.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

>several people have called out the thread for being derailed by this fucking troll.
>they're briefly addressed before said troll lays down bait again.
>thread derailed again.
YOU DUMB FUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!



>> No.18658495

>tells people to stop shit posting
>shit posts
maybe crit that excerpt you replied to

>> No.18658502

Hah! Joke's on you, I was just baiting for you to posts Fanfics with over 1 million words!

>> No.18658509

In the adult affiliate industry, everyone was buddy-buddy with each other and always seemed to slyly ask "what niches are selling for you?"

Years ago there was a site called "Gorilla Gras" where a man in a gorilla costume used to go to places like Lake Havasu and he would spray a pina colada mixture from a giant fake black dong into the mouths and faces and all over the bodies of clothed women in bikinis. I kept that shit a secret as long as I could because I was making $1000 a day with ads up on spermshack.

Makes perfect sense that would apply to being a writer as well, all the fake-friendliness. It is genuinely nice to encourage others but when people start asking about sales, your marketing, and such, that's when you know they're just trying to duplicate you. Might not be a bad thing if they're trying to duplicate your process and not just plagiarize your shit. Wasn't "The Matrix" involved in a lawsuit where some dude claimed it was stolen from him? I'm pretty sure there are multiple famous stories about plagiarism and how people have got away with it.

>> No.18658596

I don’t know what you’re trying to do here. /wg/ is all but dead.

>> No.18658601

Yep, retarded.

>> No.18658661

I've got this dialogue hang up. Two guys get into a fight. Sometime after the fight, they get a chance to talk it out and I want one of the guys to admit he was scared of the other. I'm already going to make it obvious via stalling, shaking hands, etc. without him saying it, but I think it's important to have the character tell this other guy that he was scared of fighting him.

So if I lead into a dialogue exchange that goes like "I was scared of fighting you" or something of that effect, is it poor dialogue or is it fine in the context of they're talking it out after the fact?

>> No.18658701

the adrenaline gives the stronger man an erection and the weaker man can't stop eyeing it
the dialogue following the weaker man keeps making cock related freudian slips turned puns

>> No.18658746

what in tarnation

>> No.18658814
File: 392 KB, 753x591, 1626029179767.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]

A dream I just had: "The Pizza"
>Dad is making pizza for dinner -- youngest daughter haet his pizza
>The pizza is different this time...the daughter loves it!
>She makes a copy of the recipe in case her dad loses his
>The daughter has to leave for *work* -- Humanity is in a long war against aliens and its time to return to the war
>The daughter remembers along the way how her family always mean to her
>She ran away alot, learned to survive on her own, learned to fight so she can beat up her sister, etc.
>All of this has helped her become a better fighter, which in turn helps her defeat the aliens
>In their defeat she gets sent back in time
>The aliens have *time travel* technology but its forbidden for them to use it for anything other than an energy source
>She arrives some time before she was born
>She finds her family -- they're completely different, happy normal regular people
>Her dad is making pizza
>"At least some things are the same."
>She sneaks the pizza recipe so her dad would find it so she doesn't have to eat his shitty pizza anymore
>Her dad walks in on her and catches her
>She ends up telling her story
>The daughter spends a happy time with her loving family
>Her dad promises to make her the pizza she likes in the future and the family promises to be kind to her and never become the people she remembers
>Alien scouts invade for the first time
>The daughter defeats them and is able to recover their energy source for a gateway to the future
>Her family is shocked by the person that she is
>The daughter then realizes that her life can't be different, it has to be how it's supposed to be even if she hated it, otherwise they might never win the war
>She tells her family they have to change, they have to be the mean people she remembers them
>The family reluctantly promises her
>Her dad says he'll make her the pizza recipe when it's time
>She goes to back to the future

>> No.18658896

Last thread, we had 100 posts arguing whether women could get erections or men could menstruate

>> No.18658904

Anything that is not lockstep with globohomo is considered a "counter culture", no?

>> No.18658913


>> No.18659065

You were right to bring this to us. This particular brand of story (suffering character finds time travel, creates ideal life, which causes tragedy, and then they must go back and instigate their own suffering for the good of others) has been done to death.

>> No.18659094

lol, r/writing
Title: Guess what guys! I just discovered the one super secret trick that is going to boost your daily word count and completely revolutionize your creative process! It's so a-m-a-z-i-n-g!
Post: Try listening to music! I find that fast-paced music helps me with action scenes, but slower classical stuff is better for romance. It might be different for you.

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