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/lit/ - Literature


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[ERROR] No.18854565 [Reply] [Original]

Any recommendations for books in which the main character's wish is granted, but it turns out to backfire? Sorta like the Monkey's Paw

>> No.18854577

>>18854565
groceries is the highest monetary value.

>> No.18854582

Doctor Faustus

>> No.18854584

>>18854565
free groceries is op. you can hire a shitty hooker like the Girl in the pic for a fraction of the grocery price, same with Gas unless you work by driving.

>> No.18854586

>>18854565
Groceries
Man’s gotta eat

>> No.18854587

>>18854565
Groceries. I don't have a dog. Also monkey paw law says that can be fulfilled by just killing us both the next day.

>> No.18854606

>>18854565
I hate when people think those gross negro asses are hot, I wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole
I would never want my dog to live as long as myself, I'm not a fucking sadist
people who post this nigger facebook shit should hang themselves

>> No.18854609

>>18854577
And it’ll back that ass up

>> No.18854615

>>18854565
Of course groceries...

>> No.18854619

>>18854609
I have no trouble pulling that type of ass wish or not, you feel me butters?
Hey if you're still in Portland we should meet up again. Miss you.

>> No.18854637

>>18854565
I don't have or want dogs so free groceries even if it means like free 300 a week to cover almost all groceries or some bullshit like you can get all you want if you go Wednesdays at 11 am to 12 that's gangbusters

>> No.18854643

>>18854577
But having sex with that girl has the highest spiritual value

>> No.18854662

The dog one.

>> No.18854721
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>>18854565
>good sex for 10 years but HIV afterwards
>free gas for life but your legs get chopped off
>free groceries for life but clinically obese
>your dog lives as long as you but he goes to hell for it

>> No.18854741

>>18854721
Animals souls can not by their nature survive death. Tthey are perishable when separated from their proper bodies, unlike human souls. Therefore they can not go to hell.

>> No.18854753

>>18854643
anon's lemma

>> No.18854762

>>18854741
YOU ARE A BIG FAT LIAR! A BIG FAT LIAR AND I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!

>> No.18854784

>>18854565
Groceries, since food is my biggest expense. Then I could eat as many Medjool dates as I want.

>> No.18854825

>>18854721
I would simply not be obese.

>> No.18854894

>>18854721
I don't want to have to take care of a dog for that long. I'll just take the AIDS and live the good life as long as I can.

>> No.18854917

>>18854565
should i want to hit that ass? I'm white

>> No.18854925

>>18854917
No, she is gross. You are normal for not being attracted to that.

>> No.18854970

>>18854577
No, the girl is. Prostitutes charge 100 to 150 bong an hour here. If you were to shag her for an hour a day for a year it woud cost a minimum of 36,500 bong and a maximim of 54,750 bong. Assuming she doesn't menstruate since she is magical, otherwise reduce both figures by 25% . . . unless you're sick and into that. No way is anyone spending 36,500-54,750 bong a year on groceries, so the woman is the best value.

>> No.18854979
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>>18854925
You are a shut in if you think white women don’t get asses like that

>> No.18854995

>>18854979
She is an escort. I have eaten that ass before. 10/10. Where did you find her? She deleted her adultwork.com profile q while back.

>> No.18855007

>>18854970
You know it's possible to have sex without paying for it, right?

>> No.18855016

>>18854565
This was made by a nig, that's black ass for sure. Would love to fuck the ass I choose for a year more than anything else no doubt about it

>> No.18855017

>>18854995
Prove it. What’s her name and nationality.

>> No.18855021

>>18854979
I didn't say white women can't get a grotesquely large ass. I said I'm white, and thus aren't attracted to this American beauty standard.

>> No.18855043

>>18855007
Possibly but unlikely if you're on /lit/.

>>18855017
I think she's English. I don't know her name, and she almost certainlywas using an alias. All I can say is she, or someone who looks exactly like her, was or is an escort in the UK.

>> No.18855096
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Groceries are nearly unbeatable but then again...
with a car you can go anywhere you want.

>> No.18855151

>>18855043
She’s not English, she’s Dutch. Her name is Vera Djikmans. You’re confusing her with another blonde who is English and has a big ass. She was “the queen of /fit/“ and was posted in “high test” threads years ago until she burned the coal and married (and had a baby) a nigger lol

>> No.18855169

>>18855151
Oh, okay. The girl I met definitely wasn't Dutch. There is an uncanny resemblence though, could be twins.

>> No.18855201 [SPOILER] 
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>>18855169
I just remembered, her name is Iskra Lawrence. Is this the escort you went out with?
Instagram models all end up looking the same, I think they get tattoos on their ass precisely because it’s so hard to distinguish one implant-filled dump truck from the next?

>> No.18855203

>>18854565
Dog > groceries > ass > gas

>> No.18855212
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>>18855169
>one twin was Dutch, the other wasn’t

>> No.18855249

>>18854565
I don't have a dog. I have money. I'm an incel.
What do I pick?

>> No.18855262

>>18854643
>sex before marriage
>spiritual value

>> No.18855291

>>18855212
I don't mean literally, idiot. I mean they look extremely similar. You're either an actual cretin or being wilfully obtuse.

>>18855201
No, that wasn't her either. And I didn't go out with her, just some callgirl I banged.

>> No.18855316

>>18854565
Dog. If it lives as long as you do regardless of what happens to you, you can:
>Harvest him for infinite food, fulfilling the purpose as the groceries but for the duration of your life.
>Put on paid performances displaying his immortality, also allowing you to get unlimited gas.
>[REDACTED]
>be dog friend

And so, because dog allows you to have all of these for the duration of your life, dog is the objectively correct choice.

>> No.18855354

>>18855291
You’re talking to a retarded tranny that shits up any thread he participates in. Ignore the freak.
>>18855212
Buttercunt, you will never be even 1/1000000 as beautiful and hot as she is. I would literally smell her anus and inhale every Gouda cheese and fries-with-mayo scented brap that came out while I would shit on you you. You’re +50 years old and ugly as sin, no man wants to come near you and any woman who saw you would scream like in a horror film.

>> No.18855372

>>18854721
Do I lose my legs above or below the knee?

>> No.18855401
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>>18855291
>face-blind
>”ur a idiot”

>> No.18855403
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>>18854979
Looks like personal cope to me.. never knew you had a fat brapper, Butters, you mind me clapping them cheeks?

>> No.18855643

>>18854979
Never said that, retard. Stop looking for any excuse to post porn, you fucking freak.

>> No.18855942
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>>18855643
>Answers twice
Heheheh

>> No.18855955

if you dont pick the dog youre not white

>> No.18855986

Obviously butttranny has pics of semi nude women, an unhealthy male mind would have a storage for such things.

>> No.18856037

>>18855942
Different anons.

>> No.18856117

Free gas. I would just fill up a tanker worth of free gas and sell it back, I would make bank

>> No.18856180

Test

>> No.18856184

>>18854721
HIV is something you can easily live with

>> No.18856208
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>>18856037
Pretending to be the same person

>> No.18856229

>>18854565
i'd take the gas, personally. i sure do love to drive

>> No.18856250
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Dog. I'm married and not poor.

>> No.18856299

>>18854970
>36,500-54,750 bong a year on groceries
no, it says you get the groceries for 5 years, fuck the girl for 1 year.
it's actually:
7,300-10,950 bong a year or
608 - 912 bong a month for groceries.

so it' comparable to spending 152-228 a week on groceries. which is a lot of expensive groceries, that's enough to feed 2-3 families. But if it's like a nice store and you like buying a lot of booze maybe i can picture someone making that worth it. I'd just turn around and sell it on a farmer's market personally.

>> No.18856472

>>18854619
You forgot this: :3

>> No.18856476

>>18854565
there is the play Faust.

>> No.18856478

>>18856472
3face isn’t from Portland tho

>> No.18856488

>>18854565
>sexual gratification you can find literally anywhere
>something i can buy with money any time
>something i can buy with money any time
the dog is the only correct answer. an entire lifetime of friendship and companionship with a doggo can never be replaced or found elsewhere

>> No.18856554

>>18856488
I am allergic to dogs so I can only choose one of the other three :(

>> No.18856583

>>18854565
Ass. It would free up so much time and mental anguish having the ass on command I can easily aquire the currency needed to never worry about shit like gas and groceries

>> No.18856587

>>18854741
Shut the fuck up. I will see rocky at the gates of heaven

>> No.18857061

>>18854606
>guy who hates life doesn't like the female form
What a surprise

>> No.18857066

>>18854565
Obviously gas. You can resell it.

>> No.18857073

>>18854565
I choose spending 5 years of buying and selling groceries in bulk everyday, then never having to work a day in my life.

>> No.18857084

>>18854582
>>18856476
Did Faust's wish truly backfire though? He wasn't happy at the beginning, and he never got happy, so, what did he lose? It's not like Gretchen would have sex with him as an old man anyways.

>> No.18857086

>>18857066
>you cant resell meat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9q9LvBUCgsI

>> No.18857096

>>18854565
My dog

>> No.18857601

>>18854721
already obese so fuck it why not get free food

>> No.18857935

>>18857096
>>18854662
>>18855203
>>18855316
>>18855955
>>18856488
You fell for it. The dog lives as long as you not because he's immortal but because you die in the next 10 years.

>> No.18857971

>>18854577
funniest shit I ever read

>> No.18857989

>>18854565
Holy fuck the dog, give me it

>> No.18857993

>>18857989
Monkeypaw. You'll just die in five years.

>> No.18858066

>>18854577
based american

>> No.18858144

>>18854565
bottom left, without needing to think about it. however, i would consider top left if i could do that for a bit longer than a year

>> No.18858167

>>18857971
why? i guess you can go literally anywhere all the time with free gas if you want to, but if you get free groceries you're basically living for free. not to mention that you can also buy all the most healthy and expensive foods, like those fruits i want to get but i always skip on them cause they are just so damn expensive. i could also decide to eat steak every day if i wanted to

>> No.18858186

>>18854565
You're literally just an idiot if you don't take the groceries
If you pick the dog you're a better person than the rest though

>> No.18858214

>>18858186
>dog
who cares? if it dies, get another one. have puppies

>> No.18858249

>>18858214
regardless picking the dog is the only selfless option the others are purely selfish

>> No.18858535

>>18856583
It's the opposite. The more you indulge carnal desires, the stronger they grow. You sate nothing.

>> No.18858539

If you choose anything but the dog you're subhuman.

>> No.18858852

>>18858167
I did not think about it that way. yuou make a solid case for perpetual steak day

>> No.18860013

>>18856478
Just came here to say
FUCK YOU FUCGLY TRANNYFLY
YWNBAW
FUCK YOU AND YOUR SHIT OPINIONS
PS FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>> No.18860106

>>18854721
so if I chose the food, do I automatically get fat and can never get rid of the weight no matter how hard I try?

>> No.18860118

>>18854565
The dog.

>> No.18860141
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>get free gas. sell to cagecucks

not choosing this is basically wanting to be a loser

>> No.18860144

>>18857061
I'm not into apes
how can you be literate and have such horrible nigger taste?

>> No.18860339

>>18854565
The Old Man and the Sea, probably. The essential spirit of your triumph but nobody will ever know, etc etc

>> No.18860415

>>18855955
Underrated.

>> No.18860594

>>18855262
practicing sex before marriage virtually guarantees you'll be more likely to stay in the marriage you end up in because you won't be backed up balls to brains when you make that decision. Christians have a crazy high rate of divorce and a lot that don't stay out of social shame. God doesn't want you living this way you were tricked by a horny old man pretending to speak for god a thousand years ago. Honor god by making love amigo, he wants you to be happy

>> No.18860604
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>>18860415
It’s stupid

>> No.18860631

groceries easily

>> No.18860656

>>18855354
>the namefag is a portland tranny
fucking kek of course he is

>> No.18860681
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>18860656
>everyone I don’t like is tranny
>*dreams of tranny cocks every night*

>> No.18860687

>>18860594
there is research literally showing that the more sexual partners a woman has before marriage, the more likely she is to become divorced

>> No.18860688

>>18860604
>>18860681
I will never understand the psychology of tripfags, why do you do this? everyone automatically hates you because of the trip
why don't you just post without a trip? you can say the same things, why are you like this. why are you so petty? don't you get tired of being called names by all the people who hate you? are you part of a discord chatroom full of other trannies and you post screencaps where you gloat about the insults you get as if that meant anything? But I know that many of you just do it to stand out. Why don't you just join a forum where it's normal? Why do you want to do this in a place where anonymity is the norm and tripcodes are meant to be used in a specific case scenario where you need to identify yourself in a specific thread?
why are you so fucking uncivilized and puerile?

>> No.18861222

>>18854565
I'd choose the dog option without a doubt. Girls are easy enough to find; valuing gas or groceries is just sheer materialistic stupidity. And if you really wanted to, you could monetize your dog by marketing it as the "oldest dog on earth" or whatever the fuck.

>> No.18861255

>>18861222
Why would you want your dog to live so long? It's cruel and selfish. The world is a horrible place. The poor thing can't even fathom living like 8 times past his natural life cycle. He'd be miserable and confused in an increasingly terrible world that is not fit for animals.
Dog is by far the most evil choice in this.

>> No.18861618

Take free groceries and then use it to cause mass starvation. No groceries for anyone else. Hold the world hostage for..... one million dollars!

>> No.18862035

>>18861255
dogs have no concepts of any of those things you fucking brainlet

>> No.18862108

>>18854741
Ecclesiastes 3:19 – "Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless."

>> No.18862126

>>18862035
Dogs have more concepts than you.

>> No.18862494
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>>18860688
Tripfags'll never hope to understand, I hope I meet one someday so I can relentlessly bully them for such inane idiocy

also fuck the new captcha

>> No.18862502
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>>18862494

>> No.18862533

>>18854643
Engaging with and validating the mortal shell is actually of the lowest spiritual value. Spurn the worldly, don't embrace it.

>> No.18862540

>>18854741
bugman fuckwit. this is why I hate the spiritually weak

>> No.18862549

>>18854565
I would have to imagine the eternal dog would also be free of health complications, else he would still be susceptible to mortality. My biggest fear of pet ownership is taking them to the vet and getting dinged with a $1000 bill that informs me he is terminally ill with only 1 year to live. Ripped off on the price of the dog, ripped off on the feeding of the dog, ripped off by the early death of the dog and being charged extravagantly to find out such tragic news. But if he's an assuredly healthy boy, I think I have to go with the eternal dog.

>> No.18862552

>>18856478
Little hard to keep a record of all your suitors.

>> No.18862850

>>18855942
She's 7 foot, T1 is 6'5ft

>> No.18862872

>>18854565
> muh doggerino
> muh fur babby man's best friend
Unironically, literally, just go neck yourself.

>> No.18862875

>>18862540
Confusing humankind and mere animals is the absolute peak of spiritual weakness.

>> No.18862938
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>>18862850
Nice

>> No.18862988

>>18855096
Based. I'm getting free gas and living on the road

>> No.18863942

>>18860687
Anon I know exactly what research you're referring to and it shows you don't know how to read studies. That study recorded women's sexual partners and weighed them against whether they were married once or multiple times.
Think for a sec, if we're measuring by partners before marriage, and we are weighing women with one marriage versus multiple. who is more likely to have more sex outside marriage hmm?

And besides, god doesn't want you living this way