Write what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.19060792]

[Anonymous No.19060804]

>>19060792
These threads are shit

[Anonymous No.19060816]

I skipped a test today because there's too much shit going on with my dang ol emotions and I can't handle it or really care too much. I think I could have passed it. there's probably time to sort it out later, that's probably why I'm so chill about it, that and the fact that I am pretty upset I guess. Just gonna shitpost all day and try to feel as little as possible.

[Anonymous No.19060824]

I made a promise so i'm going to tomorrow to the latin mass.

[Anonymous No.19060851]

People think its sad to stay in the same city or town your whole life. Of course there are benefits to moving, but I think there's something really special about the kind of connection you build with a place that has been and always will be your home. I love my friends and all my family, the thought of leaving them when I have no reason to seems misguided. They are the people that I live for and who make my life worth living.

I completely understand why people move, but I also think it's silly to look down on the people who stay.

[Anonymous No.19060860]

>>19060824
that sounds wonderful anon, I hope you'll share your impressions afterward. I know that orthodox religious services aim to have a kind of total aesthetic (music, singing, words, icons, architecture based on the tabernacle, incense) that is supposed to help the believers emulate that they are something like angels in heaven, singing Gods praise eternally. It would not surprise me if there will be something of this nature going on

[Anonymous No.19060870]

>>19060851
I think you are in right track anon, both are valid ways of living.

[Anonymous No.19060879]

>>19060851
i live in 30k people town and going to capital one (around 550k) really tends to make me uneasy. i feel such an outsider there.

[Anonymous No.19061050]

>>19060851
I moved out as soon as I had the chance, and only then did I really understand what you're saying..
I personally am glad to be living the big city right now, only here are my wings allowed to open. and in a way it was this city that reminded me how much I'll need to return to my village, how impossible it would be to be human without roots - even if only in memory.

[Anonymous No.19061195]

I wish we had never developed elictrical and petroleum based technologies

[バイポラーたん !Gh99z/1SzU No.19061203]

Do people really seek out comfy literature or is it a /lit/ meme

[Anonymous No.19061214]

>>19061203
Define "comfy literature"

[Anonymous No.19061232]

SO BANE - AND THAT'S THE BLOODY THING ABOUT BANE - HE REPRESENTS CHAOS, IN FACT, HE'S AN AGENT OF CHAOS, AND IN CONTRAST, WE HAVE CIA, WHO REPRESENTS ORDER, ROUGHLY SPEAKING. BUT CIA, IN HIS BITTER RESENTMENT, IN HIS-HIS POSTMODERN CULTURAL MARXIST IDEOLOGY, HE TRIES TO TAME THE CHAOS - AND THAT'S A BAD IDEA MAN, IT'S LIKE-IT'S LIKE IF YOU TRIED TAMING FIRE, IT'S JUST GOING TO LEAVE YOU BURNT. BUT CIA, HE TRIES ANYWAY, MOTIVATED BY A LUST FOR POWER - AND IT'S LIKE - GOD ITS SO SAD - ITS LIKE YOU'RE NOT A BIG GUY! YOU'RE NOT A BIG GUY, AND NO POSTMODERN RATIONALIZATION WILL CHANGE THAT. THE EVIDENCE IS CLEAR. THE SCIENTIFIC LITERATURE IS EXPLICIT ON THIS MATTER. AND SPEAKING OF TAMING FIRE - WHAT HAPPENS BY THE END OF CIA'S 'EXPERIMENT'? THE FIRE IS NOT TAMED, QUITE THE OPPOSITE, IT'S ACTUALLY RISING. AND THIS DEMONSTRATES EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED IN THE 20TH CENTURY. AND IT'S LIKE SOLZHENITSYN WRITES IN THE GULAG ARCHIPELAGO - THE BLOODY MARXISTS ATTEMPTED TO QUELL FIRE, BUT IN DOING SO THEY MERELY FUELED IT. AND WELL ACTUALLY, THEY DID QUITE A BIT MORE. YOU CAN'T PRETEND TO BE A BIG GUY IF YOU'RE NOT. WE TRIED THAT EXPERIMENT IN THE 20TH CENTURY, AND IT WAS A BAD IDEA MAN! AND IT. IS. NOT. A. ROUTE. YOU. WANT. TO. GO. DOWN.

[バイポラーたん !Gh99z/1SzU No.19061306]

>>19061214
uplifting spiritual works like Siddhartha and Leaves of Grass

[Anonymous No.19061368]

How are you supposed to figure out what to with your life when you feel deeply that nothing worth doing is possible? I’ve spent the first half of my twenties grappling with this question and I’ve still not arrived at an answer besides the obvious - giving up.

[Anonymous No.19061380]

>>19059504
I'm from a pretty poor area, basically all of my friends' parents are divorced. If they're not divorced we've all suffered some sort of trauma from their horrible relationships.

Despite all that I know that there is nothing I want more in my life than a family of my own and a woman I can love for the rest of my life. I am in my early 20s and while I don't spend all of my time online I do spend all of it reading and working.

[Anonymous No.19061392]

>>19061306
(Different poster) I always thought of comfy as easy reading, setting. Like P.G. wodehouse stuff.

[Anonymous No.19061408]

To the anons currently attending uni as mature students: How's the financial situation? Do you have a job alongside university? Is working to finance your studies extremely stressful?
I'll probably go back to uni in a year or so, and I'm scared tbqh
From Europe btw so tuition doesn't play a role

[Anonymous No.19061409]

I just read the entire last thread. These are some thoughts that popped up in my mind as I read.

"The real Anon has never been tried before." That's the excuse I feel like I and others in these threads give when they talk about how they wish they could change their personalities to be more outgoing and straightforward, rather than cowardly, meek, and timid. I'm trying to imagine my idealized-self and realize it's not what I am right now. So what I can do is ask myself what I would like to see myself do, and compare it to what I feel like doing. Treat myself like a child or a pet, who doesn't know the "right" thing to do and discipline it until I continuously do the right thing.

For example, my social interactions have dropped since the pandemic, so when I took the bus to uni today I was determined to talk to someone new. I ended up sitting with some cute girl. She was responsive but not enough to really make a long conversation with. But I felt myself almost pussying out of talking to her. I pushed myself through it anyway and talked about some mundane shit like what classes she has today and then remained quiet until we said goodbye to one another when we arrived to campus. I'm not particularly good at striking up conversation with strangers unless there's some icebreaker crap that gets people talking about a particular topic, and I don't know how to apply that in a random conversation. Any thoughts? "Did you see that new show people have been talking about?"

[Anonymous No.19061417]

I wonder why janny isn't banning me even after deleting my shitpost threads

[Anonymous No.19061429]

>>19061306
>Siddhartha
Literal retards like this fucking shite book. As some other said that one can more about Lutheranism than Buddhism after reading that dohshit book. That man had no understanding of South Asia and it's traditions.

[Anonymous No.19061430]

>>19061429

[バイポラーたん !Gh99z/1SzU No.19061448]

>>19061392
That makes sense. For me it's anything that is written in a good-hearted tone while retaining literary merit e.g. Huckleberry Finn or TKAM. I always had the impression that /lit/ prefers tragic works regardless of author because their tone contrasts with the perceived anodyne qualities of commercial lit

[Anonymous No.19061456]

Blissful quiet, the rocking of a recent love
Is both repose and anguish in my fainting dreams

[Anonymous No.19061461]

>>19061430
He fucking pissed on master and student relationship tradition of South Asian religions. That is very central even to the traditions like Sufism. What he wrote was basically a fantasy of enlightenment of some hippie western bitch.

[Anonymous No.19061466]

>>19061448
Yeah, they’re always asking for “depressive”. I guess they want a contrast later.

>>19061417
Wait an hour, you just might be forgiven.

[Anonymous No.19061467]

I just made a goodreads account and oh joy, I seriously reccomend you guys go read the goodreads reviews for the Holy Bible.

[Anonymous No.19061490]

>>19061467
Why don't you reproduce some of them here instead. Perhaps together with a refutation if you can (not "dude you're wrong the book is great cus it inspired by da holy ghost)

[Anonymous No.19061573]

my friend has dated a woman who is suffering from burnout syndrome (I think you call it this: she worked so hard she burned herself out hard and now has a fuckload of fatigue). He had this idealized vision of what they could have once she gets well, which is delusional, which I probably should have told him. I have sort of hinted at how it would probably be difficult to switch dynamics between him caring for her and them being more equal. Either way- it turns out that he has probably overestimated his ability to be patient for this woman. He said at one point that he had thought that he could help her recover but that it seems like he probably can't. But he can't drop this fantasy of what they could maybe have. They kind of split up but she changed her mind and he's been back and forth. Now he feels like she needs to prove to him that she will be able to meet him half way on what they are going to be able to do as a couple. He does not seem to understand that hte reason she can't do very much is that she is very, very, very ill. He does not seem to want to accept this. Now, the thing is, I've gone through similar medicla problems to hers, and I know for a fact that she can not be pushed into anything, and if he's going to condition their future on her "doing more for him"- while she can't let go of him- this more or less amounts to torture, and I think that once she is strong enough to understand what is happening around her she is going to resent him for it, rightly. I haven't really talked to him for a couple of days. There's been other things before too, it's kind of built up. I usually play the part of listener for him, but I don't think I want to help him with this. They'e going to meet up this weekend, neither of them can let go of this insanity. They should not be together imo, he is nowhere near the savior figure he makes himself out to be. Maybe I should tell him this. As I said, there have been other things that have built up. I was on my way over to him to keep him company cus he was sad that it seemed thing between them were finally over, but when I was on my way over there I realized that I was actually pretty fucking mad at this guy. He unironically implied that maybe his gf is pretending to be tired. This is heinous. I didn't realize that I'd reached some kind of limit with his shit until I was on my way there, and I was just about to call him and let him know when he called me and was like "we decided to try again, it's cool, you can go home if you like" and I just decided to fuck off out of all of this and go home. But after that I've kept my phone off and not checked social media. I don't want to talk to him, and I don't want to help him with this.
>inb4 you are a bad friend
yea that's very possible, but this is on my mind and I just realized that it's likely the reason I don't want to talk to him is because I don't want to help him torment this woman

[Anonymous No.19061697]

For the most part, /pol/ fears regarding the state of society in the West after whites cease to be a majority seem delusional to me. The one thing which does bother me is that I do not think a democracy is possible without a white majority. Sure, you have “democracies” like India or South Africa or LatAm but those are utterly rife with corruption and a level of political violence. The only place without white majorities which I would consider democracies are South Korea, Taiwan, and Japan, and even those have suffered from dictators, a literal cult running the country, etc., not to mention they’re all propped up by the USA. (I think if the US was to leave the region South Korea and Taiwan would be annexed by their communist counterparts while Japan would have a nationalist or communist revolution of its own). Hell, you can even see it in the USA, with us becoming more and more authoritarian and oligarchal as the white share of the population shrinks. I am not self-hating, but I don’t see how the Western democratic order will survive once whites cease to be a majority in Europe and America.

[Anonymous No.19061728]

>>19060792
tiddies, that is what is on my mind.
slightly saggy and veiny tiddies to be more precise.

[Anonymous No.19061824]

>>19061573
It sounds to me like they're tormenting each other. If they can't come to understand each other's situation because they're too retarded to communicate with each other effectively they should seek couple's therapy just so that they have a mediator.

If I were him my concern would be about what does our relationship become when she gets better.

[Anonymous No.19061832]

I literally cannot stop drinking. I'm so fucking bored without it. I hate working hard and I just want to be a bum for the rest of my life.

[Anonymous No.19061918]

All that exists is the insatiable will to life and the blind materialization of the cosmos out from nothingness. :/

[Anonymous No.19062008]

>>19061832
>I literally cannot stop drinking.
How do I attain this? I keep trying to like alcohol but it's just such a shitty high.

[Anonymous No.19062025]

im nothing >;3
v_v

[Anonymous No.19062039]

>>19062008
You have to like being sedated. If you're a speedfreak or an acid casualty you're probably not going to appreciate the numbness of hooch. Unless one of those drugs traumatized you.

[« Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ » !!bGBGaUpA8kS No.19062057]

>>19061832
Quit working hard. Find some easy paced (I need to do something like this myself). Be a “bum” that doesn’t drink.

>>19061728
Aaaaa. So hard to not think about them sometimes.
I mean, I can just put my top on and forget about them, but …

[Anonymous No.19062066]

>>19062008
Drink more

[Anonymous No.19062070]

Things would be easier for me if I wasn’t so embarrassingly Japanophilic.

[Anonymous No.19062088]

>>19062039
Well, I did way too much acid in university but that hasn't turned me on to alcohol. It's sad, too, because it seems to be the only socially acceptable way to escape this wasteland.

[Anonymous No.19062093]

>>19062088
>worrying about being socially acceptable
Actually you didn't do enough acid in university

[Anonymous No.19062094]

>>19060792
I can never engage in a serious philosophical discussion. I should give up, I'm too retarded for this. Why did I even try

[Anonymous No.19062107]

>>19062093
It's called having a job anon. My tripping hasn't liberated me from needing a place to live, for some reason.

[Anonymous No.19062130]

>>19062088
Maybe get a pill habit? Xanax is handed out like candy.

[Anonymous No.19062146]

>>19062094
You're not missing out. I went to uni for philosophy for a while and it was the most pretentious and cringeworthy environment to be in.

[Anonymous No.19062156]

>>19062008
I used to drink 1-2 beers because I liked the social effect when I went out but now I crave the sedation more than I like being out and talking to people overall. Sober + cigs or coke basically makes me unbearable in the same way that being with a girl that doesn't stop talking is.

[Anonymous No.19062173]

>>19062107
You can't show up to work drunk either. If you wanna do whatever drug off the clock, that's nobody's business

[Anonymous No.19062177]

>Mahler wrote this at age 16
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFjkRRTc3VI

[Anonymous No.19062202]

>>19062173
how do you dodge the drug tests then? not him

[Anonymous No.19062204]

I keep going back and forth between having an active social life and "putting myself out there" and pushing away everyone so I can be alone at home. My attitude changes every two months or so. It's getting tiring, I wish I could make up my mind already.

[Anonymous No.19062214]

>>19062025
Safe (1995) is a documentary about me

[Anonymous No.19062271]

Okay, so one of the defining characteristics of postmodernity is revivalism, right?
Where's neo-Romanticism?

[Anonymous No.19062305]

>>19062202
>working at a job that drug tests
Pathetic. And anyway, pretty much anything that isn't weed you piss out in a couple days

[Anonymous No.19062311]

oh ya this rules

[Anonymous No.19062336]

>>19061368
I’m reading Evola’s Ride the Tiger for insight into this question. As of now, I will survive, read and write

[Anonymous No.19062342]

>>19061232
underrated

[Anonymous No.19062376]

>>19062271
Neo Romanticism is Wagner. New Romanticism is Boy George. The term's used for various modern and postmodern movements from the 1850s on, with different connotations in different media and genres. In its most generic sense, the answer would be Germany in the 1970s and 80s, but within other contexts it can refer to many other movements in various regions and timeframes.

[Anonymous No.19062451]

>>19061368
Listen anon, I'll let you in on a secret. People won't tell you this, they think it's cruel or whatever, but not telling someone is even worse, in my opinion.
There are a few people in this world who have an innate purpose. These are called Great Men. They have always known what their calling is from early childhood onwards, and have most likely attained success and recognition even in their teenage years. Examples from various fields: Mozart, Claude Shannon, Bobby Fischer.
On the other hand, there are people like you and me. We'll call them Commoners. (Really, there are further distinctions to be made here, but we'll leave it at that.) The Commoner's sole purpose in this world is to provide sustenance, shelter and protection for Great Men, those that bring humanity forward. Beyond this, they are worthless. They are the large masses of people who live, suffer and die without being remembered beyond having provided a new generation of Commoners.

So you see, anon: If you have a job, no matter what it is, you are already fulfilling your life's purpose. Because if you were a great person, you'd have already found your purpose long ago. In conclusion: Just wage and die. That's it. That's the entirety of what you can offer to humanity. But maybe you'll facilitate some Great Man in his pursuits, which will in fact advance the entirety of humankind.

PS: It won't be your son, by the way. Greatness, like most things, is passed down genetically.

[Anonymous No.19062459]

>>19062146
I don't mean to give up - I only got into it some months ago. For the most part, I have a very poor social skill and im an ESL. Even it seems to me like the pseuds have much more interesting to say than me. But thanks anyway that makes me want to do better

[Anonymous No.19062485]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2M3AJsXafg4

[Anonymous No.19062533]

How did it get this fucking bad guys?

[Anonymous No.19062566]

I'm too dumb to escape wageslavery.

[Anonymous No.19062589]

I have watched so much porn that I can(fairly accurately) estimate what any woman looks like naked based on ethnicity and body type.

[Anonymous No.19062635]

She was everybody's whore but mine.

[Anonymous No.19062663]

>>19062451
what a pessimistic post.

[Anonymous No.19062665]

>>19062663
commoner cope

[Anonymous No.19062738]

this is one of the most remarkable things ever said
>For with the same judgment you pronounce, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but fail to notice the beam in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while there is still a beam in your own eye?

[Anonymous No.19062748]

>>19062738
>You hypocrite! First take the beam out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye
"First take the beam out of your own eye"
it is remarkable how blinding anger can be

[Anonymous No.19062760]

>>19062738
>>19062748
>>>/rel/

[Anonymous No.19062765]

>>19062738
>For with the same judgment you pronounce, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
>source: trust me bro

[Anonymous No.19062774]

>>19062635

[Anonymous No.19062807]

Yeah, alright.
So I'm fairly retarded, and every couple of months or so I pick a new obsession. I've been exceptionally obsessed with alexander of macedon for the last two years, to the point where I've read everything from modern biographies, to late Roman writings. I've practically memorized a college course load of info on this guy's conquests. What really frustrates me is that any discussion on this subject devolves to "mmm well his PR department said this and this, soooo, we shouldn't trust our 2nd hand accounts". I understand historical skepticism, but it pisses me off when the skepticism turns into full blown revisionism with these people. "X person was painted as incompetent/treacherous by the ancient propaganda machine, therefore X person was LE GOOD. Oh what evidence I have to the contrary of those historical anecdotes? Weeeeell, logic says that if Y is in doubt therefore the opposite of Y is true. I will apply this rhetoric to people now."
I feel like such a faggot when I say this but, why do people have to be compartmentalized within two ends of the spectrum? Where is LE HUMANITY, LES FLAWS? Fucking hell, I am a faggot.

[Anonymous No.19062831]

This board is kill. We've been saying this about every board for years, but this time I mean it.

[Anonymous No.19062933]

>>19061408
>How's the financial situation?
Bad. Somehow every time I get money I've got to loan it to my family or pay rent or pay something unexpected. I also don't have a driver's license and I'm trying hard to have one, meaning I'll spend about $2k in total because driver schools are basically mafias in my country.
>Do you have a job alongside university?
I don't. Even if I wanted one, I'm living in a university dorm an hour away from everything and I don't have a car.
>Is working to finance your studies extremely stressful?
I'm not working. I'm in STEM and shit at what I do, too. The university itself is stressful enough.

I'm in Europe too.

[Anonymous No.19062975]

我想自殺

[Anonymous No.19062977]

Missed my psychiatrist appointment today. I slept through it, woke at 3pm.
More or less I've given up on getting treated through them. So what am I living for?
I'm in university. I've started skipping most of my classes to make things tolerable.
But I don't really know what the goal here is. If I can't feel normal again I don't want to live.
I need to do a treatment that involves staying in a mental, but that makes college impossible.
So do I wait until after graduating for the treatment? Maybe I'll have to.
Alternatively, I might just go nuts and disappear if things get too hard. I don't really know.

[Anonymous No.19062986]

>>19060851
I broke up with my ex because, after going from in-person dating to long distance when she moved, she wanted me to move across the country for an unsure amount of time to be with her.
It was sad to break up but I still think I made the right call, especially since my family here is growing and changing very quickly and I want to be involved with it as it goes.

[Anonymous No.19062994]

>>19062451
>Beyond this, they are worthless
Why does a life have to be remembered into the future to be worthwhile?
I'd argue a Commoner who lived and died happily would have had a more worthwhile life than a "Great Man" who was miserable but remembered after his death

[Anonymous No.19063033]

I'm writing a book about a homosexual man who gets sent back in time by aliens where he ends up molesting his younger self in bed while he sleeps

He is sent back to the present where he believes the whole experience was a strange fever dream

Several years later he winds up in therapy and has the traumatic discovery that he was molested as a child by a stranger in the night. He then has to wrestle with the even more traumatic memory that he was very likely molested by himself.

The therapist thinks that his trauma has induced a psychotic break and he is put on anti-psychotics and eventually institutionalised in a mental hospital.

Several years later he is still in hospital and now in a drugged up catatonic stupor. Meanwhile, the CIA have started experimenting with time travel. They take unwanted members of society and place them in an extremely technologically advanced machine, which, they believe, may be sending humans to another dimension. It sends them somewhere at least. This is what they must find out

The homosexual man is put through the machine and suddenly awakes up as a six year old is his childhood bed. There is a stranger in his room. He can sense it. Suddenly it all clicks into place and he realises where he is. The stranger is himself from the future and from the past.

The temporal complexity of the situation is overwhelming, for sure, but what is even more overwhelming is the fact that he is realises he is consumed with a burning erotic intensity in his child groin. A shadow looms across the room towards him. It is the strangers fully erect penis. His own penis. Simultaneously from the future and from the past. He can only follow his instincts at this point - what else is there to do - and he sucks himself off and swallows the load.

He awakes in the morning, still a child, still with all the memories of his life in a mental hospital and as a CIA test subject, still with the taste of his old future past self in his mouth. Years pass. He buries the memories away. It is his only way to move forward

He lives his life and becomes a man. One day, in his sleep, he is teleported to a alien spaceship where he meets a group of unknown jester-like entities. They smile at him with a devilish grin and ask 'Would you like a blowjob and eternal life?'

The book is called No Strings Attached

[Anonymous No.19063068]

I never really was into anime, just watch stuff here and there when friends keep reccing it long enough. Usually I say it was "good", although I just think I could have spent the time differently.
But I've just seen Perfect Blue and yeah, that's pretty cool.

[Anonymous No.19063070]

Have you read a book in which you wanted to devote your entire life to that book's message, theme, etc.....?
I have. "Les Sources" (published in English as "The Wellsprings" by Alphonse Gratry, which was somewhat paralleled in Sertillanges "The Intellectual Life". Also, the Divine Comedy is something like a capstone, a work I would dedicate myself to its study as something of a Grand Unifier, a scientific/religous integrater, a description of reality

[Anonymous No.19063091]

>>19060792
it was another cloudy Friday afternoon. I was having my last subject, English class. I didn't pay that much attention, I was bored from whole week so I just sat and drunk my coffee as I was drawing solitude tree at middle of autumn. its all leaves fell off, as I was making last hays of wheat in the background the school ring rang and I asked myself with depressed expression: „what now? "..

[Anonymous No.19063107]

>>19063091
sorry for grammar, im too tired to have it completely right

[Anonymous No.19063116]

>>19063070
Industrial Society and its Future

[Anonymous No.19063122]

>>19063068
For me anime is better as a visual medium than a storytelling one.
My favorites tend to be those that go crazy with the art and animation, though of course a good story on top of that will always be a bonus.

[Anonymous No.19063128]

>>19063033
I'd really like to read this, anon.

[Anonymous No.19063132]

Each day I belive more and more that Isaac Newton was right about the world ending in 2060.

[Anonymous No.19063138]

>>19063132
And Nostradamus says this is the last Pope. Hmmmmm

[Anonymous No.19063144]

>>19063132
Each day I belive more and more that the Mayans were right about the world ending in 2012.

[Anonymous No.19063182]

>>19061697
>The only place without white majorities which I would consider democracies are South Korea, Taiwan, and Japan, and even those have suffered from dictators, a literal cult running the country, etc.

Did you know? South Korea has only ever had ONE president that wasn't either assassinated while in office or sent to prison after leaving office.

[Anonymous No.19063188]

>>19062451 “It is clear that the rule of being oneself implies that one can speak of a ‘proper nature’ for everyone, whatever it may be, as something well defined and recognizable. but this is problematic, especially at the present time. it may have been less difficult in societies that did not know individualism and traditional societies organized along groups and castes where the factors of heredity, birth, and environment favored a high degree of internal unity and the differentiation of types and where the natural articulations were reinforced and nurtured by customs, ethics, laws and sometimes even by no less differentiated religious forms. all this has long ceased to exist for modern western man and has long been superseded along the road of liberty; thus the average modern man is changeable, unstable, devoid of any real form. the Pauline and Faustian lament, ‘two souls, alas, live in my breast’ is already an optimistic assumption; all too many have to admit, like a typical character in Hesse, that they have a multitude of souls! Nietzsche himself admitted this state of affairs when he wrote ‘one should not assume that many men are persons. there are also men composed of several persons, but the majority possess none at all.’”

[Anonymous No.19063258]

I got a pretty bad grade on a Japanese quiz today, so that's all that's on my mind right now. Can't even really focus on studying for my other courses because I want to go off course and study japanese anyways. But I shouldn't.

[Anonymous No.19063311]

I'm already fucked up, each day of innaction will only bring more catastrophy to my life. I know this, and yet, the anxiety of failure paralyses me each time I get courage enough to tell myself I'll try, thus ending that wimpy courage.
I can't hide myself from my responsibilities forever, they aren't hurting me now, but the consequenses of running away each day will get me and break me further. If I try, I know I'll fail and get broken, if I do not, I know a different and worse fate will come. I need to fight my brain and this cowardice that is with me all my life.
I'm already fucked up, everything is already going terribly wrong, all I can do is try and accept the consequenses of a life hiding.

[Anonymous No.19063312]

I think my problem, at a fundamental level, is that I'm ashamed of who I am and I feel that I have a moral obligation to self-isolate myself from society as a result. Hence why I cease any long term communications despite seemingly positive initial interactions.

And funnily enough, I don't know why exactly I feel this way about myself. I mean, when one observes something unnatural, is it not fair and right to be conscious of it, to keep it away from the public as it is unsightly? I mean physically I appear to be ordinary, but inside, that is not the case. Thus I see myself as having the responsibility of safeguarding others from well, myself, unless absolutely necessary.

I've tried to read self-books about this, about how everyone else feels this way about who they are and that it's normal, etc. etc. But that has not been my experience outside of these books.

On the surface this screams like teenage angst manifesting itself, but I am decades older from my teenage years and my feelings remain unchanged. And I don't think they ever will.

[Anonymous No.19063323]

>>19063258
>I got a pretty bad grade on a Japanese quiz today, so
Should have worn the headband.

[Anonymous No.19063341]

It feels like every girl I'm interested in ends up already being taken before I met them.

[Anonymous No.19063343]

>>19063258
Do you want some advice? What level are you?

[Anonymous No.19063371]

>>19063341
The average person is taken I think. Honestly dating apps are the best bet these days, just can't be dumb and contact thots, if you want a serious relationship.

[Anonymous No.19063388]

>>19063258

[Anonymous No.19063418]

>>19063341
I'm right there with you, man. It's seems that these days finding a single woman that isn't hideous in mind or body is like looking for pebble in a mound of sand.

Or maybe I'm just shit at looking, who knows?

[Anonymous No.19063434]

>>19063312
You need to build confidence and self-love. You need to find out what makes you ashamed of yourself, it can be a childhood trauma, body issues or lack of achievements or interests and work on it.
I can't help you much further. Maybe a therapist can help you find out what is the problem and how to deal with it if you truly feel like you can't do it alone.

[Anonymous No.19063441]

>>19063343
Japanese 101. I didn't really remember my KA KI etc and my GA GI etc. I practiced writing them last night and forgot. I told my prof. that maybe I should have also practiced words with these hiragana. That's the kind of quiz we had.
I guess I'd like advice on ensuring I can memorize my hiragana. I tried using Anki, but it kept failing on me and was a bit confusing, despite the guide.

[Anonymous No.19063493]

>>19063441
It's like learning them as a kid. You write them out sounding them out slowly like a retard while trying to follow the lines like ten times and then you get to write the word for the big picture for the letter. Vocalise them so you learn to subvocalise when reading.

[Anonymous No.19063514]

>>19063341
Good women go fast

[Anonymous No.19063528]

>>19063441
Damn that is early on. Tbh just do what I did and make a physical deck of flashcards, you'll have to drill them for a week or two and then it will be fine, it comes through practice.

[Anonymous No.19063562]

>>19063441
Print these
https://www.education.com/slideshow/japanese-alphabet/

[Anonymous No.19063566]

ἡγοῦ δέ γ᾽ ὧδ᾽ αὐτὸς σὺ
κισσοφόρε Βάκχειε
δέσποτ᾽· ἐγὼ δὲ κώμοις
σὲ φιλοχόροισι μέλψω.
Εὔιε, ὦ Διὸς σὺ 990
Βρόμιε, καὶ Σεμέλας παῖ,
χοροῖς τερπόμενος
κατ᾽ ὄρεα Νυμ-
φᾶν ἐρατοῖς ἐν ὕμνοις,
ὦ Εὔι᾿ Εὔι᾿, εὐοῖ,
παννύχιος ἀναχορεύων.
ἀμφὶ δὲ σοὶ κτυπεῖται 995
Κιθαιρώνιος ἠχώ,
μελάμφυλλά τ᾽ ὄρη
δάσκια πετρώ-
δεις τε νάπαι βρέμονται·
κύκλῳ δὲ περὶ σε κισσὸς
εὐπέταλος ἕλικι θάλλει.


This way, Lord Bacchus crowned with ivy,
do personally be our leader:
and with revels I will hymn you,
who love the dance!
Euius, you Noisemaker,
son of Zeus and Semele,
who enjoy the dances
of Nymphs at their charming songs
as you ramble over the mountains—
Euius, Euius, euoi!—
striking up the dances all night long;
and all around you their cries
echo on Cithaeron,
and the mountains shady
with dark leaves and the rocky
valleys reverberate.
And all around you ivy tendrils
twine in lovely bloom.

[Anonymous No.19063712]

The whole cloudy sky is a lovely lavender color right now. Feeling blessed.

[Anonymous No.19063718]

Wish I had anything to devote myself to.

[Anonymous No.19063729]

>>19063718
>anything
Re-emergence of the steam powered car. Go! Go! Go!

[Anonymous No.19063732]

>>19063729
Ehh, it's not gonna work. Too many environmentalists.

[Anonymous No.19063737]

>>19063732
It's one of the most environmentally friendly methods of transport.

[Anonymous No.19063784]

>>19063182
That just makes it worse. If no nonwhite countries have stable, healthy democracies and the democracies in white countries are degrading as the white share of the population shrinks, democracy is finished. Whites will be a negligible minority in Europe and America if trends continue. When they cease to be a majority, democracy will die. Have kids you pale fucks I don’t want to live in a commie nation.

[Anonymous No.19063810]

Is degeneracy something you can lose or are some people meant to be degenerates forever?

[Anonymous No.19063829]

>>19063810
Degeneracy is something that can be lost, but most degenerates are those who enjoy indulging in such behavior (even if they know it causes them pain)
You have to willingly pull yourself out of degeneracy. It doesn't happen on it's own.

[Anonymous No.19063830]

>>19063810
you can lose it. maybe not 100%, you'll have your memories and so on, but you can basically be "reborn"

[Anonymous No.19063837]

>>19060792
COCK AND BALLS

[Anonymous No.19063842]

>>19060792
Had a dream that I suddenly had a child, a newborn. I failed to care for it adequately and had the most overwhelming grief. I didn't know such strong emotions were possible yet my subconscious can simulate them even though I've never experienced what it's like to have a child before. It made me realize that I am not giving everything I have each day because I failed to care for the child out of my own lack of effort. In ancient life if you fail to put in everything you have towards your child it dies and in modern life the child becomes miserable and lonely and unable to operate properly in the world which is almost worse. Now the prospect of having a child seems terrifying to me but the dream made me realize how much effort I am not putting in to life and how much more I would have to put in if I truly loved something more than myself, it made me realize that I only live to serve myself, what it felt like to have a child even just in a dream makes all moral and ethical philosophy seem immature because the don't talk about this kind of love, the feeling overrides everything, even now when all I have is a faint memory of it.

[Anonymous No.19063845]

>>19063810
In its original sense, no; degeneracy was genetic dysfunction. Now, it means a perpetuated dysfunction of a more memetic variety, which can be conceivably lost by social or individual divergence from a given dysfunction.

[Anonymous No.19063863]

>>19061409
Good job stepping out of your comfort zone anon, that shit isn't easy. I don't think you can really preplan things to talk about, it has to make sense at the time - there's a reason why weather is the go to small talk.

[Anonymous No.19063888]

>>19063341
Mikasa isn’t real so I don’t feel anything.

[Anonymous No.19063890]

>>19063829
good to know
>>19063830
how do i become "reborn". no Christianity please
>>19063845
im to dumb(too much of a degenerate) to understand what you are saying

[Anonymous No.19063901]

>>19062336
I’ve already read that book.

[Anonymous No.19063908]

>>19061409
I think it was Alva Vanderbilt made her daughter walk around the garden and introduce herself to each bush, tree, and plant, and start a conversation about a different topic as practice for being a socialite at parties. But then she also made the kid walk around and read in a full head and back brace so she'd always have good posture so... maybe not the best person to take advice from on raising your inner child.

[Anonymous No.19063911]

What's the general consensus on e-readers? I've been resisting them for years but I don't have the space for loads of books and there's the benefit of getting everything for free. Is there a guide or anything for which ones are the best, how to hack them etc?

[Anonymous No.19063923]

>>19063890
>im to dumb(too much of a degenerate) to understand what you are saying
Degeneracy literally invented by a Zionist Jew, now it's memes all the way down, bro.

[Anonymous No.19063944]

>>19063890
Brothers Karamazov is the closest I've come to being "reborn" from a piece of literature. It has a strong religious bend to it but I don't think you need to be religious to find value in it, and in fact it has many strong atheistic arguments as well.
It may be too dense a read if you're one of many /lit/ lurkers who doesn't actually read books; if so read Seneca's On the Shortness of Life. Shorter, different message from BK, but useful nonetheless.

[Anonymous No.19063945]

I'm 34 and I have so much work to do. I'm awful. I need to start over.

[Anonymous No.19063953]

>>19063842
>I didn't know such strong emotions were possible yet my subconscious can simulate them even though I've never experienced what it's like to have a child before.

It's all a part of the ancient systems in you.

[Anonymous No.19063982]

I would like to have sex with a blue or green-eyed Kazakh girl

[Anonymous No.19063993]

>>19063718
Media ecology
https://www.media-ecology.org/Media-Ecology-101

[Anonymous No.19064045]

>>19063982
do they even flock to foreigners like in SEA? hmm maybe i'll ask the sexpats in /trv/...

[Anonymous No.19064056]

I just learned that two of the best living authors, maybe the only great living authors, don’t even use a computer to write.

[Anonymous No.19064091]

I've come to a point of what I think is maturity over the past couple of days concerning the best use of my talents. For a long time I have been knit up trying to figure out how to make my interests my career. For example, I am very aesthetically minded: I like colours, designs, film, fashion etc. but in truth, I have very little artistic ability at all. I had daydreams of becoming a famous musician, but again, I have absolutely no musical talent.

This was confusing me, because I would have dreams of being a graphic designer or a rock star, but I would never actually work towards them - they would exist only as daydreams and potentialities and as the years went by and I got no closer to them I would only grow more frustrated.

But I've had a change of mindset. I was confusing my appreciation for such things with a calling to do those things. In reality, I have no such calling. My career should be centred on doing what suits my talents and my spare time should be spent indulging those things I appreciate from a distance. I think, you don't have to hate your job, but you should be realistic about what your talents are. Sure, you can work hard and gain skills that didn't previously exist, but you'll never have the skill of somebody with talent and natural aptitude in that field. So you should identify what your talents are and maximise those. Accept that we each are destined to live separate lives and that no one person can live all of them.

[Anonymous No.19064097]

>>19064056
Probably because they're used to it. GRRM uses 1980's wordstar because he's "used to it" and can't imagine writing with anything else. "X uses it so it's the best way to write" is not a good assumption.

[Anonymous No.19064103]

>>19064056
I've found that when I'm learning or studying I need to take physical notes in a notebook otherwise I can't learn. The same is true for more creative pursuits or my diary, for whatever reason I need to write everything by hand otherwise it feels false and my thoughts won't come to me.

[Anonymous No.19064118]

>>19063923
i understand now.
>>19063944
i dont read too many books but ive read Epictetus so i think I would enjoy Seneca. thank you.

[Anonymous No.19064141]

>>19063845
>>19063890
>>19063923
>>19064118
>/lit/: translating Max Nordau into fluent degenerate since 1892

[Anonymous No.19064178]

I want to take over the world. But I'm a pretty abysmal speaker and I don't think I have the charisma to get anyone to elect me into office. So I'll go the next best route- through influencing a generation through story. I'll become an author of a children's book series, one that's whimsy enough to hook everyone early on, and write the story so that the characters grow up with the readers though childhood. But where JK Rowling stopped, I will continue. These kids, finished with the rather conclusive but open-ended ending (the day before what amounts to as the "final battle," all of the main characters are betrayed and brutally murdered by the most popular character, who then commits suicide for his atrocity), I will continue the story in a new series with a darker tone that fits the ending of the children's series, basically what guides young adults from harry potter into game of thrones, but within the same universe and by the same author. I will pour my beliefs in the importance of religion and culture, seed doubt in the mob rule system known as democracy, build up and destroy the sandcastles of atheism and nihilism, and explore we truly mean when we say the word "God."

The only problem is that the "adult story" is thus far, way more developed than the "children's story"

[Anonymous No.19064198]

>>19063911
Anyone else use them? The Kobo ones look decent. I read the reviews on the wiki but they're quote outdated now

[Anonymous No.19064215]

>>19063993
McLuhan was a pretty tough read, I only made it about 30 pages into Understanding Media. I have several Media Ecology books already but their conclusions already seem too obvious, yes communication technology is sabotaging us but there's nothing we can do about it.

[Frater Asemlen !XS8vrClKs2 No.19064267]

I see the sun in sunflower,
the moon a stellar mist,
all of heaven’s endless power
but one pleasant bower
whose branches twist
in my eye’s midst.

blue, I was withdrawn,
sky-bereft of sweet delight,
ruddy red-eyed Dawn
soon was gone
all in sweet twilight,
all in peaceful night.

[Anonymous No.19064346]

I occasionally see a girl at the bus stop and around campus (I'm in uni) and I can't get her out of my mind for some reason. I've never spoken to her and don't even know her name and I feel so pathetic fantasizing about a relationship with some girl who doesn't even remember I exist. How do I get over this? It's been 3 weeks

[Anonymous No.19064368]

>>19064267
nice

[Anonymous No.19064383]

>>19064346
In 100 year we will be all dead. It's your move bro and regret is here to stay

[Anonymous No.19064477]

>>19064383
I don't think cold approaching like a retard is a good idea though. I have no excuse to randomly start a conversation with her. Plus like I said I'm in a college campus and don't want to get accused of sexual harassment or something

[Anonymous No.19064479]

>>19063982
Kazakh is a beautiful language and I wish I had Kazakh friends to learn from.

[Anonymous No.19064527]

You know what’s a real tragedy? The fact that this period is ripe for tragedy to a degree that’s second only to the ancient Greeks, but other circumstances prevent it totally.

[Anonymous No.19064569]

I fucking hate phone calls and I hate mail. It's all just people that want things from you. It's spam numbers texting you phishing bullshit. It's people demanding money or time from you. It gives me so much fucking anxiety. I hate it.

[Anonymous No.19064588]

>>19064569
Remember when you were young enough to enjoy getting phone calls and knocks on the front door? I remember.

[Anonymous No.19064595]

>>19064479
speaking of Kazakh, I found this from /mu/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-qhI3Sbhys

[Anonymous No.19064642]

what is that greek word for remembering something you've never personally experienced

[Anonymous No.19064644]

>>19064198
i bought a kindle paperwhite. it's fine. but it doesn't fit all my books, i should have bought the 32gb one. i have about 3400 ebooks. it's also been annoying as fuck converting everything from an epub to azw3 so the kindle can read it. maybe getting a kobo is better just to avoid the hassle of converting shit.

[Anonymous No.19064652]

>>19064642
pseudomnesia?

[Anonymous No.19064657]

I need someone to slap me in my fucking face. No, I need something harder than a slap.

[Anonymous No.19064663]

>>19064588
I tense up when the door goes unless I know I have a delivery coming. I wait until I hear their footsteps drift away and then I hurry to a window to spy on them. I don't like having to turn everything off to pretend the house is empty when I hear them coming.

[Anonymous No.19064665]

> want to write
> have no idea what to write

[Anonymous No.19064669]

>>19064663
come on man just gotta let all that water roll of yer back. Just don't pay it any mind. Stop playing the game

[Anonymous No.19064684]

i bought some lectures on wine from the audible sale cuz i'm thinking about getting into wine drinking in the evening to calm my nerves. not getting wasted or even buzzed, but i think i'm going to start taking a glass of wine with dinner.

[Anonymous No.19064708]

>>19061368
>nothing worth doing is possible

very silly. lots of things are worth doing and many of them are very possible. a nice car, a nice home, a loving family, a head full of wisdom and beautiful bits of literature and art, an expansive appreciation and knowledge of art and nature, a charitable disposition, a trusted friend. these are all worthwhile, some easier then others. but things take time, and time can be a blindspot for many people. don't be blind to time and the possibility of the accumulation of a a great internal wealth over time. self-love is partly love for your future self, what you do now furnishes your future. do you want to wake up in ten years and rue the person you were for every day of your past? wouldn't it be better to look back and say thank god i had the foresight to work on myself? to marvel at how you have grown?

[Anonymous No.19064716]

>>19064588
I miss running across the street to see if my best friend was home. I miss getting calls from my friends on the land line to see if they wanted to go bowling. I miss getting birthday cards in the mail.

[Anonymous No.19064728]

>>19061573
I have a feeling you want to fuck your friend's girlfriend.

[Anonymous No.19064837]

i thought my spider bro was dead but he's back :)

[Anonymous No.19064840]

how do I deal with the impulse to seek out pity?

[Anonymous No.19064884]

my skateboarding has totally plateaued and it's a horrible feeling

[Anonymous No.19064892]

>>19064665
Write about a writer no knowing what to write about

[Anonymous No.19064895]

>>19064892
That’s a bit of a cliché

[Anonymous No.19064951]

I was promoted at work. It's an odd feeling when you go from deposable to 'important.' People, that once tolerated me, now look to me for guidance. So odd. So strange. Don't know if I like this change.

[Anonymous No.19064956]

I’ve come to feel that writing is and always will be inferior to verse and theater. I don’t know what to do with that information anymore.

[Anonymous No.19064997]

>>19064956
write a play

[Anonymous No.19065004]

>>19064956
Start writing your 4chan posts in verse

[Anonymous No.19065007]

I'm feeling pretty embarrassed about cursing out loud for a few hours in my driveway working on my car for the last two days, and that I will probably do the same tomorrow.

[Anonymous No.19065008]

I’m just extremely aware of how I’m wasting my life and that’s why I’m miserable.

[Anonymous No.19065025]

>>19064997
The thing is, plays aren’t even my favorite. My favorite stories are not plays, and not novels…

[Anonymous No.19065032]

>>19064716
I miss having a friend in my neighborhood that I loved hanging out with so much that one summer I biked to his house at 8 AM every morning and was embarrassed when his grandpa opened the front door to see me yet again.

>I miss getting calls from my friends on the land line to see if they wanted to go bowling.
Being completely honest, the happiest moment in my life so far (and probably ever) was getting a phone call one time from my childhood friend where his family offered to come pick me up in their van to watch a movie together. I was literally ecstatic.

[Anonymous No.19065043]

J.M.W. Turner is my favourite painter

[Anonymous No.19065046]

>>19064588
>tfw never had any friends to call me

[Anonymous No.19065096]

I just need marks from one more assignment and I passed this semester.. I didn't manage to go skiing once because of work and study but I'm going to pass!

[Anonymous No.19065143]

wondering what a Ted Bundy harem anime would look like

[Anonymous No.19065227]

>>19064837
Spider bros do that. I saw a giant one the other day and thought he was a hallucination because he flashed across my peripheral vision.

[Anonymous No.19065247]

>>19064595
Awesome, thanks anon. Have you seen the Kazakh ballet? They're fantastic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yAm9qs1qkY

[Anonymous No.19065266]

>>19064588
I miss ringing my best friend every Christmas to compare which Lego we go.

[Anonymous No.19065300]

>>19060824
Starting to go to mass was one of the best things that happened to me this year. If you are used to the vernacular mass, you should know that the Latin mass is much more formally circumscribed and its liturgy is much richer, so I invite you to read a book explaining the Extraordinary Form Liturgy. Also, to understand Latin, you can learn to use a missal, some parishes make them available, they contain the Latin texts, the translations into the vernacular, the kneeling and the signs of the cross to be made, the responsories to be said and some clarifications on the theme of the mass. So dress up a little, bring a coin for the offertory and remember that you can only receive communion if you are baptized and think you are in a state of grace.
It's a lot to consider, but when you start to hear the relationship between the liturgy, the Blessed Sacrament, and the rest of the dogmatics, you get a lot of fruit from the Latin Mass. For the rest, the sacrament itself has the same virtues as in the vulgar Mass.

[Anonymous No.19065489]

>>19064895
If you don't know what to write, then use it as an opportunity for practice. Just write anything at all. That's the point I was trying to make. Clichés exist, no harm in using them to help yourself.

[Anonymous No.19065585]

>>19064346
the other day i talked to a cute chinese girl at the bus stop. she had curly hair. i wish i got her number.

[Anonymous No.19065595]

damn i just spent like 45 minutes trying to find this song from when i was in college. they used to play it on fuse tv mostly late at night on that one kind of indie playlist. the band had two sort of hits and a remix. i cannot fucking remember it at all, but i want to hear it again.

[Anonymous No.19065606]

Getting used to the new pills. Feels like a light has been switched on in my head. Little bit of background anxiety which is non-ideal. Awful sleep. Gonna have to switch to green tea, I think.
4TAAA
AAA, indeed.

[Anonymous No.19065624]

i cried and no one can hear

[Anonymous No.19065654]

>>19064588
Worst.....I was the one who knocked

[Anonymous No.19065656]

It's 8AM I'm so horny I can't stop imagining taboo sex scenarios in my head

[Anonymous No.19065658]

...But it's not the time for sex it's time to read Derrida

[Anonymous No.19065659]

>>19065595
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCvRdeHSNJk
fuck yes found it, "the music", yeah no wonder i couldn't remember it or find it.

>can't stay in
>can't go out
>cuz if i do i know
>i'm gonna breeeaaaak

shit man that should have been the anthem last year

[Anonymous No.19065662]

https://web.archive.org/web/20130929075444/http://www.claremont.org/publications/crb/id.957/article_detail.asp

[Anonymous No.19065664]

I can’t shake the idea that the J00z are going to continue to take over the world and make life shit for the rest of us. Not sure what else to do. INB4 rent free

[Anonymous No.19065666]

>>19065664
>Not sure what else to do
convert to judaism, obviously

[Anonymous No.19065676]

I am an absolute madman

[Anonymous No.19065681]

>>19065664
>Da juice
Rent free

[Anonymous No.19065682]

>>19063890
>how do i become "reborn". no Christianity please
in terms of understanding the harm of sin this has probably been the most helpful to me

[Anonymous No.19065686]

>>19065664
>INB4 rent free
seriously though, why can't we go one thread without being mentioned?

we must be the most consequential people in history.

[Anonymous No.19065692]

>>19065681
I clearly stated “INB4 rent free” anon

[Anonymous No.19065706]

i have a pretty huge cock

[Anonymous No.19065709]

>>19065692
Yeah and I clearly said rent free because you stated “INB4 rent free” you absolute fucking retard lmao

[Anonymous No.19065717]

>>19063810
>And the child never says, "I cannot." The child does not dare do so, and neither is it true - the one corresponds precisely to the other - for precisely because the child does not dare say "I cannot," it is not therefore true that it cannot, and it therefore turns out that the truth is that it can do it, for it is impossible to be unable to do it when one does not do otherwise; nothing is more certain - as long as it is certain that one does not dare do otherwise.

[Anonymous No.19065753]

Usually when people get PTSD they're mostly fine in life but shut down whenever something triggers them. I was in a situation to develop PTSD but instead I just became slowly emotionally numb over several years. The weird part is that instead of being triggered by memories of the cause, I feel nothing whatsoever. I wouldn't even think I have trauma if my weird dreams didn't happen. But every so often, in my dreams I fantasize violently murdering the person who made my life hell right before I went numb.

I think the person on Quora that hypothesizes that I'm just holding feelings in is right. There is *some* reaction to all events, basically, but it's extremely blunted so that it's like I don't feel anything at all. My theory is that my brain unconsciously conditioned itself to restrict processing any emotions. But this also takes a lot of work in the body, which is why I feel tense all the time and my bowel movement timing is weird. If I could just loosen this tension in the brain, everything would fall into place, and probably a flood of emotion would happen all at once. It would be incredible.

But hell, I don't know. I'm just brainstorming. I've been unable to feel emotions or pleasure partially since 2014 and entirely since 2017. I just want it to be over with.

[Anonymous No.19065767]

>>19065753
>I was in a situation to develop PTSD but instead I just became slowly emotionally numb over several years. The weird part is that instead of being triggered by memories of the cause, I feel nothing whatsoever.
This is literally a symptom of PTSD

[Anonymous No.19065777]

>>19065767
don't listen to him, what you've done is defeat PTSD

[Anonymous No.19065779]

>>19065767
Really? I've never seen that in the symptom list

[Anonymous No.19065792]

I'll get fired soon. It's a good thing.

[Anonymous No.19065811]

>>19065792
Sick one mad cunt

[Anonymous No.19065857]

>>19065792
i've always been such a hard-working employee i contemplated getting a job and just doing the worst job possible to see how long it took to get fired

[Anonymous No.19065860]

>>19065779
Google "PTSD Emotional numbness", emotionlessness is a rather common trauma response.

Also,
>Markedly diminished interest in activities that used to be enjoyable.
>Persistent inability to experience positive emotions, such as happiness, love, and joy.
Are part of the symptom list.

[Anonymous No.19065867]

I'm a hot deconstructionist.

[Anonymous No.19065874]

I will probably die without even knowing the very reason of our own existence. This sucks.

[Anonymous No.19065883]

>>19065874
There probably isn't a reason. You just happened to be alive at our current point of recorded history and evolution. I don't know if that helps.

[Anonymous No.19065889]

>>19065874
We are the result of two rocks accidentally smashing into each other a long ass time ago and now I have a fucking credit score. Fuck the search for meaning. Fuck trying to answer a why question about some monkeys who learned how to properly throw rocks. Fuck that fish that decided to step out of the water. There is no answer to why.

[Anonymous No.19065900]

I think that language in the upcoming centuries will not just be written speech but will start incorporating visuals/schemas a lot more and will have structural/diagrammatic properties rather than the linearity it has now because the way we are interacting with technology is shifting the way we think from a linear type of thinking to a systematic type of thinking. Also memes are the simplest dumbest example of pictures becoming language like there is a reason I look at the doomer twink wojak and I know exactly what this percept means or I look at the recent Noam Chomsky pictures and my brain just immediately goes "yes honey" because each meme is its own semantic field and I read and understand this language. We are already communicating in pictures they are a form of language / language taking another form.

[Anonymous No.19065901]

I want to compose uplifting poems, energetic and joyful verses that make you feel like life is worthwhile, but the world is in such a state that I don't find anything joyful to write about.

[Anonymous No.19065906]

The first person (me) to create the gesamtkunstwerk will absolutely hit the history jackpot

[Anonymous No.19065916]

I shouldnt read the news, seems like we're going closer and closer towards economic collapse. Not to mention that energy and gas crisis will probably bring back nuclear energy back to top spot.

[Anonymous No.19065925]

Why do anything if you don't have a degree?
Say you'd like to translate an author into another language. You may or may not have the ability to do it properly, but it doesn't matter, since no one will take your translation seriously because you are a dilettante.
Your worth as a human being is decided upon by the amount of letters before or after your name.

[Anonymous No.19065926]

so now that i've got a career end game that uses my hands, I can finally stop pretending I like doing "intellectual" things like I've got a 160 IQ, and just do intellectual things as I enjoy them. Pleasure not duty. authentic over ideal. less repression. It all involves accepting a demotion in my idea of myself. I wish I had that 200 IQ, but it's not in the genes. And living the life of a 180+ isn't going to turn me into Wittgenstein, it's going to make me bored. Ironically, Wittgenstein had the same anxieties...even wittgen wasn't wittgen. Nietzsche: There are no great men, only men acting great.

I don't know. I'm starting a new era of my life, but in the back of my mind is always a Frost - New Hampshire

>I'd elevate the already lofty mountains. The only fault I find with old New Hampshire. Is that her mountains aren't quite high enough

ambivalent depression. Wasteland like, projecting wretchedness onto anything. So many assumptions about the world that need editing, but the last therapist I had told me to read kendi and called me a white supremacist. hypocrites.

after endless dragging the river for dead bodies, you want to dissolve into the world. repression to go on. That's the chapter I'm on.

[Anonymous No.19065954]

>>19065883
A well intentioned (you) always helps. Thanks.
>>19065889
>We are the result of two rocks accidentally smashing into each other a long ass time ago
>a why question about some monkeys who learned how to properly throw rocks. Fuck that fish that decided to step out of the water
I don't believe in these theories.

I like to think that there is a occult task that an individual has to achieve in order to find the real meaning of life. I probably won't find it, but at least I'll try...

[Anonymous No.19065985]

>>19060851
>emigrate from birth country to the other side of the planet as a toddler
>be displaced again after making precious memories and friends through my freshman year at high school to the other side of the country
>complete high school to then attend university in yet another entirely different region for """financial reasons"""""
>now, two years after graduation, currently about to drop out and take a woodworking apprenticeship on the opposite side of my family's home state

im only 20 now but the self-righteous feeling from my lack of any social constants is definitely waning

[Anonymous No.19066042]

>>19063911
just dig around and look at the models and read about them. it's better to find and consider all the info yourself, it's what I did.
I bought an 8 inch Kobo forma, personally I think anything smaller would be too small for me. the 6inchers look tiny. I know Kobo has a couple of new models now but I'm not at all up to date on them.
in case you're looking to buy a forma, tell me because it has a couple of specific issues and if those things matter to you, it might not be a good purchase. I did my research and they didn't matter to me. anyway, I wouldn't go for an Amazon product because fuck that shit. it has ads for crying out loud

[Anonymous No.19066063]

>>19064267
I like it. hey, maybe it's me that's simple, but I find your simpler poems far better and more evocative than when you use more ornate language and esoteric composition

[Anonymous No.19066076]

Feels bad to be a straight female with an intense foot fetish

[Anonymous No.19066098]

A friend of mine came into some money and bought me an expensive gift unprompted which I naturally want to return though this might be tactless, because now I owe a debt and don't want to be a prisoner to gratitude. What should I do about this?

[Anonymous No.19066158]

>>19065860
Well, guess I have PTSD then. Weird. I always assumed it was depression.

[Anonymous No.19066167]

>>19066158
It's possible that you have both.

[Anonymous No.19066215]

I feel like I'm in the process of finally remembering something horrible, probably something that I did but possibly something that was done to me. If I am then it is somehing that has been completely blocked out. I have sometimtes had this overbearing guilt that I can't place. All the people that I can imagine having done something horrible to have been happy to see me after what should have been the time of it happening. I suppose there is one guy who was really not glad to see me when we encountered eachother later, but at the time he wanted to stay friend with me. His girlfriend left him for me though, it was a couple years later we became some kind of friends. It's possible he always resented me, though her reasons for leaving him were very, very good. So that could be the reason, that he finally admitted to himself he never liked me. There was a point between her and me where in hindsight I think maybe he tried to sabotage us. I would not feel guilt about any of that.

I woke up today thinking "it probably happened in a car". I don't know what is supposed to have happened in a car. I haven't driven much, I can drive now but this should have happened before I had my license. I can't think of anyone I could have done something to that would have had a license at that time. There is one part of time where there is one person who it is possible that I played some kind of mind-game on, some kind of power-game. I don't remember that well, but I do remember that I was genuinely caring of this person at roughly the same time. But I noticed later that I had had a kind of power over her, which seemed very dark. I had been unfaithful with her, and she had depended on me. She had kind of hung around me after the fact. I can't remember how or why that happened, I really don't think she should have. We had been together for a long time. Basically what happened was that I eventually realized how badly it had hurt her that I had been unfaithful, and I called her crying, asking for forgiveness, which she did not grant but she listened to. And after that we hung out and it was like a spell was broken, like she had been under my sway but now had her autonomy back. And in what must, or at least ought have been one of the ugliest, most vile moments of my life, in resentment I told her this "It is as if I have had a power over you, and now because I apologized it's broken", and she agreed, and with resentment I spat out "you're welcome". Those feelings tell me maybe I treated her a lot worse than I dare remember. But she has been happy to see me after this. She has even been caring of me. She walked up to me a couple of years later in the city, out of nowhere, greeting me, happy to see me, and we hung out most of that day. So it doesn't seem like she hates me or feels she has reason to hate me. She had time to think and feel about us, and years later she was happy to see me. She absolutely did not have to approach me, I had not seen her.

[Anonymous No.19066219]

>>19066215
cont

So I don't think, if there is a victim, that ultimately it is her. I don't think so, but at the same time, my therapist asked if I had ever threatened a woman, and I told her I've never threatened anyone (which I remember is not true, I have threatened a man) but as I said it her face flashed before me, this woman who could very well have hated me. And so now i've thought very intensely about that. How bad was I to her?

[Anonymous No.19066283]

>>19061050
wrong translation you stupid italianlet. 'Paese' here doesnt mean village but country.

[Anonymous No.19066308]

>>19064708
The world would be healthier if more people thought like you.

> over time
Only recently have I come to accept how long things take, now I'm trying to show this to my friend. I think they will come around to it. Hoping for quick success is not healthy. You wont be useless in 5 years, but I often thought that way before. You can get a lot done in 5 years and through exercise and eating properly, healthy life can be extended by more than 5 years anyway.

[バイポラーたん !Gh99z/1SzU No.19066309]

I feel like I'm having a high degree of brain fog. Not a psychotic break but I'm definitely disoriented. I can't sleep. My head is dizzy. Don't know what to do. Asking /lit/ for help in the middle of the night

[Anonymous No.19066316]

>>19061232
Very based

[Anonymous No.19066325]

I wonder if Proust fucked Jean Cocteau

[Anonymous No.19066452]

I want to learn and share with others. But I don't have the time to learn everything I want and I don't have to people to share with.

[Anonymous No.19066472]

>>19066076
why foot fetish?

[Anonymous No.19066473]

Him : Babe wyd
Me : Just thinking about that ABSTRACT MACHINE - PLANE OF CONSISTENCY - EXPRESSION/CONTENT

[Anonymous No.19066504]

I feel like I’m becoming less intelligent as I age. All I do is stare at spreadsheets all day at my job and earn a pittance.

[Anonymous No.19066509]

>>19066472
>why foot fetish?
I can't explain it I'm obsessed with feet/ankes/footwear, feet are the sexiest thing. Once I was fucking this twink and I just started licking his feet for fifteen minutes straight because I couldn't resist it, hottest memory in my life

[Frater Asemlen !XS8vrClKs2 No.19066612]

>>19064642
Do you mean Anamnesis?

[Anonymous No.19066625]

>>19064642
sex?

[Anonymous No.19066626]

>>19066612
Fag

[Anonymous No.19066632]

>>19065874
eevee's design sucks. look at that stupid face.

[Anonymous No.19066639]

>>19066632
it's better than your face

[Anonymous No.19066641]

>>19066639
honestly no it isn't

[Anonymous No.19066642]

>>19066641
post face

[Anonymous No.19066650]

>>19066642

[Anonymous No.19066668]

Papa smoke

[Anonymous No.19066708]

>>19060792
Twinks.

[Anonymous No.19066710]

>>19060792
I LOST MY TESTICLE AND IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS I ONLY HAVE ONE TESTICLE AND IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.19066729]

>>19066668
eyyyy

[Anonymous No.19066834]

>>19066076
fascinating

[Anonymous No.19066840]

>>19066708
<3

[Anonymous No.19066853]

>>19066710
tell me more, anon. you mean you're in physical pain, or just that you're distressed? I have a tumor. I might soon only have one too - or maybe I'll die. I haven't even seen a doctor yet but it's huge and been growing for years - could be too late for surgery, in which case I'm just not going to take treatment. on some level I'm probably glad if it's the exit sign

[Anonymous No.19066916]

I love living in postmodernity. It's FUNNY AS FUCK

[Anonymous No.19066980]

i barely slept but i don't feel tired

[Anonymous No.19067004]

>>19066980
GOOD

[Anonymous No.19067011]

My mom says she'll buy me Les Miserables. I can't read french though.

[Anonymous No.19067133]

>>19067011
Il faut lire le Français

[Anonymous No.19067144]

Language is not about words or images or phonetics or concepts in particular, essentially language is about making connections within a system... This is the core of language but the connections can be between different things

[Anonymous No.19067265]

>>19066309
vaxxed?

[Anonymous No.19067269]

>>19067265
I'm "vaxxed" and I've never had brainfog or any complications/any type of feeling bad.

[Anonymous No.19067275]

Do any of these climate-change niggers ever stop to think:
If the movements they're party to are always on about how they'll punish the rich and the elite for destroying the planet and profiting off it, how come they themselves and the rest of the middle class is the foremost recipient of constant "Save the climate/Save the planet" messages and calls to action?
There was never a plan to reprimand and discipline the rich or the mega-corps who are actually actively polluting and most responsible for the emissions.
The reason the middle-class is the primary subject is because all this is a scheme to raise taxes according to need, condition social behavior and thinking, and shape consumerist trends by using this noble ideal called "environmentalism" as an argument/excuse.
It is all just pretentious and vain crap that means nothing, like the rest of this clown-world culture.

[Anonymous No.19067285]

>>19064642

You can't remember something you never experienced. That's like saying something is hot and cold in the same time.

Maybe you refer to anamnesis, but even in that case, the soul is able to remember because it "experienced" the ideas beforehand.

[Anonymous No.19067292]

>>19067275
...controlled opposition, as usual?

[Anonymous No.19067301]

>>19067285
deja vu

[Anonymous No.19067427]

>>19067269
same. maybe weak cold symptoms after the second shot and the arm hurt a couple of days

[Anonymous No.19067635]

college is going to shit but I don't really care right now, there's too much going on. I just don't really feel like I can care about the work, I prioritize letting everything run its course. I should be able to rectify it later.

[Anonymous No.19067659]

>>19066509
are you one of those chicks with balls and penis

[Anonymous No.19067674]

>>19065954
THEN THE MEANING OF LIFE IS FINDING THE MEANING OF LIFE YOU FUCKING RETARD


GOD DAMN IT.

[Anonymous No.19067791]

In life everything really just boils down to win, lose, or draw
On an individual level, a national level, a species level, a planetwide level, in any moment big or small you either win, you lose, or you draw
It doesn't always seem clear to you that it's happened but it has
It's illustrated perfectly in math and logic
No matter what numbers you take and no matter what you do to them there's only 3 possible outcomes: greater than, less than, and equal to and in the end this is all that really defines them

[Anonymous No.19067817]

>>19067659
*slides hand inside my pants to check*
No afaik.

[Anonymous No.19067819]

Holy fuck are they putting something in the water? I've had this weird experience a few times. It's starting to look like a pattern of retards, when before it looks like it was isolated retards who don't know how the world works.
I'll be in a group of not very popular people, being my kind self like my momma taught me. They get excited, because they get someone being kind to them, and I know a lot of people. They start to feel they are popular, because they mistake me being kind for them deserving special treatment, and me having friends for them having friends .
Then, they decide to be extra mean. I think normally they're not popular because they're grumps and entitled, but the sudden surge of potential popularity makes them pull some dick moves above their usual base line level of small time dickbrain. They try to get me involved, and I'm not doing that shit. (Thank you momma for raising me nice, I don't need this shit). I think they believe once people start being nice to you, it's your turn to be a douchebag. That's my best theory.
That's not the part that's been fucking with me though. What's been fucking with me is that eventually, because I say I don't think it's worth my time to be a dick to people, often to people I don't even know, they want to dump me as a friend. And then the fucked up part comes... They dump me, and I go on keeping on being friends with kind people who don't waste their time on petty bullshit. But they always seem to think I am somehow stealing popularity from them. Like, the reason my friends didn't up sticks and leave me for a group they might only know through me is because I'm fighting a hate war against them with all my friends. They seem to not understand that they didn't directly know anyone except through me. They think the rise in popularity they experienced near me was something they were doing. It never occurs to them to be kind to my friends to keep them in their life. And the really fucked up part is some of them think that after two basic civil conversations with some of my friends, that my friends of years will like them more. It's fucking bizarre. It's not like they're really nice to my friends or hang out with them a lot, but they think they must have a deep and meaningful relationship with these people they never really talked to at all.
Is this the parasocial relationship thing and they think my friends are like a TV show they can script themselves into? Most the time this would happen was when I was a kid, so I thought it was kids shit. But full grown ass adults are pulling this shit on me twice now and I'm concerned a whole bunch of adults are still unpopular because they're mean ass six year olds with self discipline problems on the inside still. How the fuck do you go through life not working out that maybe people don't like you because you're a dick? Try not being a dick. It's low energy and you might have friends, what's not to like?

[バイポラーたん !Gh99z/1SzU No.19067832]

>>19067819
I think you are just friends with shitty people

[Anonymous No.19067838]

>>19067817
I require photographic evidence of your soft and hairless feet

[Anonymous No.19067847]

What do you think is the best way to wind down your personal reliance on technology?

The hardest part is work and income in my experience.

[Anonymous No.19067850]

>>19067832
They're very clearly not my friends anymore, bro. I tried to make them my friends, but it turns out their definition of friendship is hating the same thing/person instead of liking each other.

[Anonymous No.19067910]

>>19064178
>*crickets*

th-thanks /lit/

[Anonymous No.19067935]

>>19067133
No

[Anonymous No.19067937]

My orgasms feel as good as ever but I've lost most feeling in my dick, so the enjoyable build up before the climax feels frustratingly dull.

[Anonymous No.19067952]

>>19066076
>>19066509
it feels good to me
my wife's friend was here today. she wore flip flops which had the imprint of her toes worn into them. i wanted to steal one of them and have a wank into it. maybe next time.

[Anonymous No.19068017]

boring

[Anonymous No.19068139]

>>19066076
I have a strong bias for tall women, and all of my friends say "I can't imagine dating a woman taller than me" I was thinking about the source of it, maybe it's because I found myself attracted to my older sisters friends, who were always taller than me being 4-6 years younger than them. My sister was on the volleyball team and did ballet in middle and high school, so I guess it makes sense that most of her friends were also above average in height. The girls being ballerinas and volleyball players might also explain the "horseshoe" of attraction I have for breasts- either very large or very flat.

[Anonymous No.19068152]

>>19068139
you want to fuck your sister

[Anonymous No.19068172]

>>19068152
no, but like every other 11-13 year old boy I definitely started hugging my sister more when I noticed she was growing boobs

[Anonymous No.19068175]

>>19060792
holy FUCK my finger hurts! Right on the proximal phalanx on my index finger. Everything else is fine, but If I even lightly press down on that spot it hurts so bad I get light-headed. Not the joint, or the palm directly below that, not even the back of the finger- just there. It's like a pain-button. Yay.

[Anonymous No.19068241]

>>19068175
aw |: get well soon anon

[Anonymous No.19068334]

>>19067674
The meaning of life is calling people retards online

[Anonymous No.19068361]

>>19068334
This

[Anonymous No.19068366]

There are simply too many authors elaborating too many ideas to get to them all thoroughly. Even within the small range which interest me, to move in this direction or that direction and have it turn out “right” is an overwhelming task.

[Anonymous No.19068371]

>>19068175
Sounds like a fracture to me. Do you play sport? It will heal on its own eventually.

[Anonymous No.19068411]

I need a second creative hobby apart from writing.

[Anonymous No.19068435]

>>19060792
all this restaurant job has done is make me more racist. i don't hate or despise the Mexicans but their communication is so direct and lacking in anything of interest. Same goes for the Blacks. I've had good experience in my lifetime with Nigerian immigrants but never with American Blacks (excluding a friend in high-school). The owner is Jewish and other than the occasional bouts of mundane cage-rage I don't feel a sense of anti-Semitism. Sometimes Celine passages will run through my head when I'm hungry. But there was an instance where he was chatting it up with a random Seinfeld-looking Jew and the arguments about in-group preferences appear and dissipated after I went back to the drone-zone.

[Anonymous No.19068448]

>>19068371
thanks anon, i don't remember doing anything at. i figure whatever it is, best i can do is wait until Monday. If it doesnt swell and spilt like a viper bite, i'll be okay

[Anonymous No.19068489]

>>19063341
Just use tinder and go to nightclubs. Most women in these environments are single.

Or start messaging girls on instagram that look to be single.

[Anonymous No.19068499]

It seems to me that men and women hold a fundamentally different understanding of spirituality.
From what I could infer, the strict distinction between the material and the metaphysical world is much more pronounced for men.
In the case of women, spiritual beings manifest and exist almost entirely in the physical world, in a completely hylic manner.
Astrology, for instance, which is the belief of a tremendous amount of women, has pseudo scientifical claims (although it is purely anti-scientific), but isn't even remotely rooted into metaphysicality.
Stars influence our behaviours and caracters in a magic manner that could be natively interpreted as non material.
In reality, it is merely a lack of understanding from our part, rather than a truly unprobeable phenomenon that is at the root of the presupposed influence of stars on us in the context of astrology.
When it comes to the traditional Christian God, the view shared by women is almost comedic, a bearded being sitting in the clouds. Some women even go as far as claiming that god could very well be a woman, thus emphasizing the fact that they clearly misunderstand what God is. a truly transcendent, metaphysical being.

[Anonymous No.19068504]

>>19068489
>Most women in these environments are single.
They've also been passed around a lot.

[Anonymous No.19068540]

My mystery grove,
I made it out of sinless color and innocent light,
And placed it among the filth,
The sacrileges of the hasty age,
But no darkness invades my sanctuary,
Rays from heaven fall like javelins,
From the blue bliss sky abyss,
And pierce out hearts with the sweet agony,
Of the immanence of the joyous transcendent,
Run among the pink flowers, the orange buds, the olivine grass,
Climb towards the canopy with leaves gilded in sun’s blood,
Run towards heaven,
How vast, how unabashed,
Blue expanses, golden thread, white flags

[Anonymous No.19068574]

>>19068504
A good chunk of them sure. But there's always those girls that were in one relationship for years and are starting to go out again, or those that just go out with friends but don't hookup much.
Either way, these are the only environments where you can reliably find single women and where it's not creepy to go up and talk to them (or message them in the case of tinder).

[Anonymous No.19068592]

>>19068574
>those girls that were in one relationship for years and are starting to go out again, or those that just go out with friends but don't hookup much.
I have some worrying news for you

[Anonymous No.19068622]

>>19068592
Despite what you may think, not every girl is some giga-slut that hops on a different cock every week. Some girls genuinely don't fuck much, or at all, outside of committed relationships. And these same girls often go out to clubs out of some vague sense of social obligation to "live life" while they're still young, even if they're not that interested in the whole thing.

[Anonymous No.19068624]

>>19060792
>>19060792
Test

[Anonymous No.19068641]

What pursuit will allow me to immortalise myself with the least amount of effort? Apart from writing, that is.

[Anonymous No.19068657]

>>19068622
whatever helps you sleep at night

[Anonymous No.19068659]

Promise me that the next thread won't be dbz pls

[Anonymous No.19068680]

>>19068435
>their communication is so direct and lacking in anything of interest
You really expect to have deep, nuanced conversations in the context of a shitty job?

[Anonymous No.19068688]

>>19068657
I don't really care either way my guy, even if every one of them was a giga-slut.

[Anonymous No.19068693]

>>19067674
I'm sorry, I expressed myself bad.

>THEN THE MEANING OF LIFE IS FINDING THE MEANING OF LIFE
That is a subjective statement, and so is our knowledge about life.
Basically, I wanted to have an objective answer, the absolute truth, about our subjetctive world (if that makes any sense for you). That, which seems impossible to achieve by now...

[Anonymous No.19068707]

Made this post in this thread earlier: >>/lit/thread/S19066795#p19067185

Mods nuked it before I could respond to all of the zoomers horrified by the idea of dedicating yourself to another person for the rest of your life. Chances are low that any of those posters will read this one but being the blabber that I am(and always have been) I can't contain myself.

>Bruh this sounds like raising a literal child, where's the dedication on her behalf?
>being straight must be so tiring
>Where's the mental and emotional maturity AND growing up together as partners? I mean a literal boomer is telling boys in their early 20s to treat a woman like she is still a girl, what the actual fuck?

In my experience women are far more mechanical than men, their unconscious systems and the feelings that arise from them influence their behavior far more. I guess I'm speaking of a kind of self-awareness, even in the intelligent women I've known and taught they are still more irrational and emotionally driven than their male counterparts. In a relationship men can go without affection or sentimentality for a lot longer than a woman can and when polled women most commonly cite a fall off(or complete lack of) in affectionate behavior(dates, intimacy, etc) as the chief reason for dissolution of a long term relationship. If you don't provide these things she's going to feel it and when someone else comes along and offers them you're running the risk of losing her. The OP was about how to stay happily married.

I love my wife. I value my love for my wife above my own life. It fills my entire spirit. She loves me back and it's certainly not in spite of any of the considerations I make or things I do for her, I enjoy them and she returns those gifts back to me as best as she can.

She tries to share in all of the things I enjoy,
she'll listen to me talk about whatever book I'm reading whether she has any clue what it is, who its by or what it is about. Even going as far as to read things with me just to be able to share in the experience. A million other little gifts in this vein. Most importantly she's given me safety, beautiful children and a home. If you can't suffer tending to the hearth I'd advise against getting married.

[Anonymous No.19068717]

>>19068688
ok cuckold

[Anonymous No.19068738]

>>19068680
No. Ideally the conversations would just be interesting and witty, not deep or nuanced. Deep and nuanced conversations although great with intimate friends can be quite boring and dreadful unless sufficiently drunk in general.

[Anonymous No.19068795]

>>19068738
to sum it up basically:
conversations you would have with women.
light, witty, intrigue etc.

[Anonymous No.19068798]

>>19068707
>I value my love for my wife above my own life. It fills my entire spirit. She loves me back and it's certainly not in spite of any of the considerations I make or things I do for her, I enjoy them and she returns those gifts back to me as best as she can.
see >>19068717

[Anonymous No.19068802]

Is forest anon okay?

[Anonymous No.19068976]

>>19068802
He was trying to do a livestream a week or two ago but his connection was fucky so i saw nothing
I remember he had a close call in the wildfires last year. Hope he stays safe

[Anonymous No.19069039]

Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä-Ä

[Anonymous No.19069207]

>>19069039
hä?

[Anonymous No.19069873]

I did not become a bastard today, today is just the day that I admit it, so today I have to take all the shame

[Anonymous No.19069885]

It is I, again. I'm having regrets over how smooth I was with my Muslim qt. While I was right in setting things right by her, I shouldn't have quasi-seduced her. It's only going to make things worse later.

>>19061306
>Siddhartha
lmao what a piece of shit that novel was

>>19069873
Same, brother.

[Anonymous No.19069892]

discovered a diary from 2011. I was 20 at the time. I saw most all social interactions as powergames. There seems to have been at least one person I seem to have wanted to be happy, a guy I worked with. He was alright. And it seems there was another guy I could more or less relax around sometimes. But everyone else was just weird powergames, all kinds of ideas about submission and transactions. It's almost frightening to think about. a truly miserable time.

[Anonymous No.19069917]

>>19069892
You were not wrong though. When you look behind the curtain and see the gears turn, it's very disconcerting. Few people are authentically kind and deserving.