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/lit/ - Literature

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3258771 No.3258771 [Reply] [Original]

Any bipolars here in /lit/?

>> No.3258773

I'm narcissistic.

>> No.3258777

>>3258773
join the club.

that is the very last thing you want to hear, isn't it? too bad.

>> No.3258799

i am almost certainly bi polar won't go for meds because ive got other personality disorders that prevent me from doing so

>> No.3258805

>>3258799
Have you ever talked to anyone? Psychologist? Neurologist? Psychiatrist?

>> No.3258813

I'm an underachiever

I'd rather be bi-polar

>> No.3258816

>>3258805

no, i enjoy what i am, whatever the label. there's nothing less healthy than being told that you're sick.

>> No.3258820

>>3258816
So you don't know for sure that you are bipolar, but it feels like you are? Do other people in your life tell you that your actions/words indicate you are bipolar?

>> No.3258822

worse, I'm vegan

>> No.3258830

I like to think that I'm bi-polar, but it's probably me trying to carve myself a special mental illness that, in my immediate group of friends, only I have.

I think I'll go for narcissism instead though. Maybe hypochondriac. I'll find something to label myself a special snowflake one day though.

>> No.3258840

>>3258830
I have a friend who is a hypochondriac. Then she got (treatable) cancer. I think it made her feel better as a person. Not even kidding.

>> No.3258843

>>3258816
I don't think they are there to tell you that you are sick. But given you think you are bipolar, you already think you are sick. They could even say that no, you are not bipolar at all.

But in fact, for the most part, you'd do the talking concering whatever problems you have(not diseases or symptoms, just stuff of life I mean). If you haven't got any, then okay.

>> No.3258845

OP here, I was expecting people who were diagnosed and certified themselves about manic depression, with episodes to tell and how that relates to creative writing and reading and so on.

But oh well.

>> No.3258848

>>3258840
Heh. People are weird.

>> No.3258850

Daniel Johnston is a prime example of Bipolar:

Manic:
-threw the keys out of his father's airplane mid-flight, forcing him to crash-land. Daniel thought that Casper the ghost would appear and save them.
-covered statue of liberty with hundreds of jesus fish stickers

Depressed:
-suicidal
-persistent drug abuse

And this man created some of the most beautiful yet simple lyrics ever. Learn to get a little control, but don't resort to meds. They ruined Daniel's brilliance.

>> No.3258851 [DELETED] 

>>3258845
Ask me anything

>> No.3258854

>>3258850
Check out his Songs of Pain if you are interested. The work of a genius:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zZv3qFEo8w&hd=1

>> No.3258857

My mood is determined randomly each morning as soon as I wake up.

>> No.3258858

>>3258850
This is bullshit. Not all meds stifle creativity. And Daniel Johnson was heavily autist, not just manic.

>> No.3258860

>>3258858
The only mental illness that needs medication is Schizophrenia, and its the only mental illness that really is an "illness" since its hereditary. Everything else is just a "disorder". It's all in your head.

>> No.3258861

I'm bipolar
I started hallucinating hard when I was 18 and had some weird cycles where I eventually when for depression help. I was recommended to a shrink and put on meds and for a year and a half I was on meds, I've been off them for the past month and a half and I'm sorta worried if I'll regress but at the same time I don't want to be on drugs and I'd rather at least try to be in control of my own life.

>> No.3258871

>>3258861
Bipolar people don't hallucinate...what a shitty shrink you got. You can have delusions (i.e. Daniel Johnston thinking Casper will appear in the real world and save him) but you don't actually visually or aurally hallucinate unless you're full-blown schizo.

>> No.3258878

>>3258858
Daniel Johnston isn't autistic...hes both schizophrenic and bipolar...

>> No.3258879

>>3258871
Bipolars can hear voices which is psychosis.

>> No.3258882

>>3258820

i'm prone to rapid changes in mood from high to low, from proper megalomania to having suicidal thoughts. i'm really too self-aware for this to affect me negatively though.

>>3258843

i think that they'll call me sick, but i don't particularly care about that designation as my goals in life differ from what is considered normal. i'm out to draw from these emotions to better understand the human condition.

i also prefer to talk to my close circle of friends who understand my character from a non-theoretical point of view.

>> No.3258887

Cyclothymia here. Close enough?

>> No.3258899

I'm neurotic and self obsessed.
>tfw too driven and self distructive to be happy and too egotistical to give up and just live a happy mediocre life

>> No.3258908

>>3258871
I am pretty schizo but the main difference between schizos and bipolar people is that schizophrenics are like that all the time while bipolar people experience waves.

They both experience hallucinations, delusions, illusions of grander, and enormouspenisitus

>> No.3258913

>>3258860
Do you know anything about brain chemistry?
Anything at all?
>didn't think so

>> No.3258914

If anyone is interested I have some poetry stuff from my first episode before I started medication
It was the way I tried to explain the world then

>> No.3258916

>>3258878
>Daniel Johnston is a prime example of Bipolar:
Please tell me you're the same person who wrote te above. GFY.

>> No.3258917

I think I may have borderline personality disorder. Would never go to a shrink to get a proper diagnosis though.

>> No.3258925

Residual paranoid schizophrenic here

AMA

>> No.3258930

>>3258925
Define residual, if you don't mind. And were you ever hospitalized?

>> No.3258935

>>3258930
Residual means that at one point when I was younger, I was a psychotic schizophrenic, but after one episode the psychotic element went away. I still hallucinate but I don't have violent mood swings anymore

Never been hospitalized but I take medication once a month for it. Does little other than (as a side effect) makes it difficult for me to lose weight

>> No.3258947

For two years when I was a teenager I had vivid impulses to kill people.

Raping my mother with a knife, cutting out a friend's eyes with scissors, stabbing my dad, eviscerating the dog with a fire-poker, throwing a child from a cliff. It terrified me because I had no idea where it was coming from. This was before I was using the internet, before I had looked at porn.

I don't know if it was psychosis, but it went away. Apparently it's quite common.

>> No.3258954

>>3258947
those diagnosed with bipolar often are diagnosed with something else as well. Most of all people with bipolar need help, a therapist most likely, because more often than not their family is torn by mild to severe mental illness across generations.

>> No.3258961

>>3258954

I don't know how that pertains to my statements. I learned to cope with it and it went away, but I think I'm now dissociated from existence.

Then again, I don't think that's a mental illness so much as a slight awareness of determinism we call an illness.

>> No.3258974

I think I have depression, but saying I think I have something likely means I don't have it.

I think I'm susceptible to schizophrenia since I get paranoid easily and resort to conspiracies easily and think the government are out to get me

>> No.3259135

Primary psychopath.

>> No.3259168

I'm hearing voices. I hope to become manic someday because it seems much more fun. I'm already a depressed piece of shit and would like some variety in my life. Since I do have periods of time when my mood improves and I sleep less and I'm still young, I might have a chance of becoming manic someday.

>> No.3259169

>>3258914
I am.

>> No.3259188

>>3258914
I am too.

>> No.3259190

>All these fucking insane people on /lit/

It all makes sense now.

>> No.3259198

>>3259190

>All these insane people on Earth.

It all makes sense now.

>> No.3259217

I have schizotypal personality disorder

>> No.3259235

When /r9k/ and /v/ are having thread about their sad beta moments, i some times post something about how they shouldn't feign depressions, and maybe start controlling their life.

I'm just as sad as them though.

>> No.3259241

Anyone else tried coming off their meds? I'm doing so at the moment and, while it's hard, it beats the dull lack of before hands-down.

>> No.3259246

>>3258773
>>3258777
I'm narcissistic too. Why am I so good looking and better than everyone? god damn

>> No.3259369
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3259369

>>3258771
Severe chronic clinical depression checking in. I'm getting better with treatment, though it will never go completely away. I've actually had some pretty good days in the last year, which is new. I still get really down and lonely sometimes, but I try to channel that into my writing and college classes.

>> No.3259374

>Be bipolar
>Read about some of the shit that REAL hardcore bipolar people do
>That dude on death row in China for smuggling drugs
>Getting into serious shit
>What do I have to complain about, I am just a little weird by comparison

Not that I actually consider that when i'm at a low point, but fuck. I'm glad i'm not that bad. We're all gonna make it brahs.

>> No.3259379

>>3258858
>Not all meds stifle creativity.
I am living proof of this. What meds did was enable me to use all of the rushing, crazy ideas, to control myself long enough to make use of them. Meds have saved my life and mind and have helped me live up to my potential. Don't listen to asshats that tell you meds will ruin you creatively because it simply is NOT the case.

>> No.3259380

>>3258860
and then there are the opinions of people who are in the medical field and actually know what they're talking about...

>> No.3259396

>>3259369
Hello my fellow chronically depressed bro. I'm like you except I didn't get better with treatment. And I dropped out of college.

>> No.3259408

>>3258974
Nahh honestly I reckon if you think you have depression you probably have it. I spent over a year with depression wanting to die/wishing I hadn't been born every day before I went to a doctor, because I was worried I'd look like some stupid drama queen or something. Turned out I had quite a severe case and moderate social anxiety. It was just over two months ago that I was diagnosed and I had to interrupt my university studies because of it. I'm not much better now to be honest.

>> No.3259442

>>3258882
> i'm really too self-aware for this to affect me negatively though.
holy shit i'm just the same.
what does it mean?

>> No.3259454

>>3259374

That dude died. He was executed. You wanna know how they do it?

They roughly wake you up while you're a sleep and march you down a dark corridor. They then shoot you unexpectedly in the head. It's completely unexpected.

Unless you know that this happens.

>> No.3259456
File: 75 KB, 645x773, 1336728830285..png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3259456

>suffer from pretty severe bi-polar during first year at uni
>somehow scrape by
>second year now, find out i'm also depersonalised pretty badly too
>somehow scraping by
>slowly figure out that i feel worse when drunk/high than sober
>tfw no crutch drug to use and escape fully
>tfw exams in 3 weeks
>somehow scraping by

hold me /lit/

>> No.3259460

>>3259456

>choosing to have mental problems
>2012

shiddyitdiyoppop

>> No.3259466

>>3259460
wot

>> No.3259467

>>3259456

When you say depersonalisation, do you think it developed slowly? I have a feeling that my childhood wasn't like this; my memories from that time feel more lucid.

I've said this earlier in the thread, but I think it's a realisation of our own powerlessness and lack of free will. It's the only way I can describe it.

>> No.3259468

Looks like plenty of people are making up their own diagnoses by browsing Wikipedia. It only counts if mental health professionals have said you to be so, cheaters.

As for my, I have been told to likely have a yet undefined personality disorder. I'm still in the progress of getting diagnosed. Hopefully I get deemed crazy enough to collect disability and fuck around and read and write all day.

>> No.3259472

>>3259468

I think that I've self-diagnosed too, but I don't want to go to a psychiatrist - it'll lessen my choice of jobs in the future.

>> No.3259475

>>3259456
I remember when I was a depressed college fag. My cure was to say fuck all that shit and just stop giving a fuck. I dropped out and got a minimum wage job, and then another job, and moved the fuck out of my parents house.

Working two jobs sucked for a while, but it felt worth it. I was independent of anyone and I realized that life wasn't as fucked up and hard as everyone wanted to make it out to be.

Now I'm scraping by and getting the bills paid with just one job and I feel great.

What my non profession advice?
Quit school. That shits a bunch of fuck.

>> No.3259476

>>3259460
>implying there is free will
>implying you can affect your brain's hormone balance by "choosing"

changing one's diet might help

>> No.3259477

>>3259475

I fucking hate normal jobs. I've had three so far and they make me sweat every time I think about them. That subordination to bad people, the failed dreams of all. It's misery - don't pretend most people are happy doing what you're doing.

>> No.3259481

>>3259472
Self-diagnosis can be very tricky. Often people are very moody and think this is bipolar, or they feel very sad and think this is clinical depression and the like. Most people use such terms far too lightly. In most cases people who actually have mental problems can't remain undiagnosed since their life derails in such a way that it is evident help needs to be sought.

>> No.3259483

>>3259456
Isn't your psychiatrist helping you?

>inb4 you diagnosed "pretty severe bipolar disorder" yourself on a whim

>> No.3259484

>>3259477

A man worked with me in a bakery. He was in his middling thirties and liked to have an opinion on everything; he liked to mountain bike. Whenever you polite disagreed with him he would get angry and try to correct you, especially if your point was against popular opinion. The man that would get angry at you for making a mistake in the eleventh hour of a twelve hour night-shift.

He would often talk to people outside the pie window (a barred window for selling pies to drunks at 4am) and flirt with the women, as though he was something special. As though this peevish, uninteresting little man could really give them a child.

Pathetic.

>> No.3259485

>>3259477
I doing 7 hours a day of physical labor ATM, I love it. I feel like it cleanses me.

>> No.3259486

>>3259477
You just got to be a man and own that shit. I'm the best worker at the joint so no body tells me shit. If they try, I start fucking with them.

How old are you? The fuck do you know about broken dreams?

>> No.3259487

>>3259485

I suppose physical labour would be all right. I just had idling at work; serving nobodies with care. What I would really like is a business, just making enough to live on.

>> No.3259488

>>3259485
Sounds like your feeling depressed was mostly circumstantial and you just hate the academic life then. Which is a nice thing, if you truly enjoy the working life. Some people get desperate from both though, and then you are truly fucked. All that remains then is crime, welfare or the madhouse.

>> No.3259491

>>3259486

I'm only 20. What do I know? I don't. I just fear.

How am I meant to confront these people? I fuck up - I accidentally spill some of the boiled chicken in the sink and get railed on. I'm a good worker (the boss says best worker) but I still fucking up.

I was manipulated into loving a thirteen year old boy during my teenage years - and was broken-hearted hiking in perhaps the most beautiful place in the world. I've had enough of life to know it's stupid to consider killing yourself; I've travelled to Paris, started and failed the Camino de Santiago and lived in London for six months with a new boyfriend that I now feel I love. I think that's more knowledge than most twenty year olds have.

I still don't like work.

>> No.3259495

>>3259467
>do you think it developed slowly
yeah definitely. i've always been obsessed with films and stuff but comes to think about it, only a few years ago did i actually feel as though i was "in a film". (oh man, typing this shit is killing me. you'll know if you had this). and then only recently has it gotten to the point where i feel as though i'm acting and i have no control over myself at all until suddenly it "clicks" and i'm like "fuck, i'm feeling out of myself again". it's an odd feeling but yeah it's definitely kinda built up.

>> No.3259497

>>3259483
nah i was diagnosed with that shit last year with a psychiatrist. but our uni only does 8 sessions per year, so i'm gonna go back this year though

>> No.3259499

>>3259488
yeah your right. I think my real problem was I don't like being dependent on other people, and I don't like working for nothing (which is what school felt like). Also I've got serious issues with committing to anything, and whats building a career other then one big huge commitment? living the life I live now I could always trade of one shitty job for another whenever I get tired of it... I've worked myself into a pretty comfortable position in my current job though, so I'll probably be chilling here for a while.

>> No.3259501

>>3259491
>I've had enough of life to know it's stupid to consider killing yourself
How's that?

>> No.3259502

>>3259497
No meds?

>> No.3259503

>>3259217
I might have something similar to this. What exactly happens with you?

>> No.3259516

>All these people refusing to go to see a therapist

You're just having the wrong idea about this whole thing. It's not like they will just call you sick and push you this and this and this medication down your throat. A psychologist will hear whatever problems you have and you'll solve those very problems yourself throughout the talk and if you can't do it, the therapist might mention you have a certain condition and from there you might or might not choose the treatment you think it is necessary, then he will point you to a psychiatrist that would also hear from you and might prescript medication.

This "I don't want to be called sick" makes no sense. You're not sick if you are not feeling bad, these conditions are not "mistakes", they are who you are. The psychologist is more than willing to accept that and they will probably even convince you of it in case you feel sick already.

Self-diagnosis is horrible in all ways, not only because you might miss it, but because these are matter of identity and when you identify yourself with a diagnosis, that changes your entire attitude. It stays there in your head like a virus. If you never saw a specialist, don't even think about these diagnosis, they are already blurry enough in the field, they are meaningless outside of it.

Cut out your prejudices about this.

>> No.3259530

>>3259491
>How am I meant to confront these people?
its not about confrontation, its all about attitude... body language. If you already let them see your soft side its harder to take back control, but you can still get there. Pretty much if someone starts bitching at you don't let yourself get upset, crack a joke about it and apologize if you need to but don't show weakness. The worlds full of fucking predatory imbeciles and a good number of them end up working shitty jobs. They are the weakest people on the planet though, you just got to be stronger.

If things get bad enough just say "fuck you I quit" and walk out. I'd suggest having a cushion of money though, I try to keep 2k in the bank at all times so I can afford to be unemployed for a couple months (just in case)

>> No.3259538

>>3259530

Thanks man, good advice. These things just sneak up on me; I'll have to train myself.

>> No.3259579

>>3259491
>accidentally spill some of the boiled chicken in the sink
>consider killing yourself

>> No.3259584

>>3259538
yeah just remember its not about being the bigger asshole or having people respect you. Its just about control. If your a hard worker on top of that then respect tends to come naturally.

hm, anyway, good luck. Its tough out there but there's some hella good times to be had as well.

>> No.3259586

>>3259579

I didn't consider killing myself because of that. It remains an unbearable memory though. That and the other job I had where two black guys somehow tricked me for around five minutes.

>> No.3259598

>>3259516
So much this.

>> No.3259684

There is nothing wrong with me at all: perfectly healthy. Suck it, faggots. So why does everyone go on treating me as though I'm ill, and why can't I sit still, or get myself to do anything that I should be doing, and why doing I keep thinking about killing myself? Then again, maybe it's just because of how deep and intellectual I am: my mind's grappling with higher concepts than that of all those nobodies... yeah... that's it.

>> No.3259690

>>3259456
unfortunately, life is mostly somehow scraping by, anon. this is nothing unique. you can get treatment to not feel stress as badly though.

>> No.3259694

They thought I had bipolar for a while. Then they found out I have Borderline, instead.
Fun times.

>> No.3259700

>>3259472
yes, you're much more employable dangerous and mentally ill.

>> No.3259710

>>3259475
not everybody can do that, though. some of us have lives and families that depend on us being able to get better employment. Also, if I had to work a minimum wage job in this current US environment, I would end up offing myself for sure.

>> No.3259746

>>3259710
oh, well sucks to be you then :p

>> No.3259782

http://www.mentalhealth.com/icd/p22-pe02.html

The ICD-10 Classification of Mental and Behavioural Disorders
World Health Organization, Geneva, 1992
F60.1 Schizoid Personality Disorder

Personality disorder characterized by at least 3 of the following:

(a) few, if any, activities, provide pleasure;
(b) emotional coldness, detachment or flattened affectivity;
(c) limited capacity to express either warm, tender feelings or anger towards others;
(d) apparent indifference to either praise or criticism;
(e) little interest in having sexual experiences with another person (taking into account age);
(f) almost invariable preference for solitary activities;
(g) excessive preoccupation with fantasy and introspection;
(h) lack of close friends or confiding relationships (or having only one) and of desire for such relationships;
(i) marked insensitivity to prevailing social norms and conventions.

Every single one of those apply to me, at least IMO. Should I seek help? Anybody here who has been diagnosed with that and has gotten professional help?

>> No.3259807

>>3259782
Don't self-diagnose, for fuck's sake!
This has been addressed many times in this thread.

You don't read online about it and later seek help. It's a common thing to read symptoms and think you have them or do not know what they mean. What you have (or rather, what you are) cannot be listed in bullet points. Those classifications and items are of no use to you and I'd advise you not to even read it. They are guidelines for professionals.

Do you feel bad? Go see a psychologist and talk about it. Session after session, you and your psychologist will know better about yourself and if there is anything that could be mentioned in terms of giving a name to your problem, he will name it. It's the other way round, don't think you have something like that right now. You don't know yourself well at all, that's the whole point of going through therapy.

>> No.3259816

>>3259807
Thanks. I do not feel dysfunctional or "bad". I do feel "abnormal".

>> No.3259852

I want to get diagnosed but I wouldn't even know where to go.. I don't want to tell my parents, can you just walk into places and ask to see someone? What places? To see who? I'm from the UK

>> No.3259858

>>3259852
Don't go to be diagnosed. Mental problems are rarely solved with a simple diagnosis.

See a therapist before anything else, I say. Psychiatrists and neurologists might be more fitting, but it's easy to find those who will just give you meds for the sake of it and cash your money. And you won't be able to tell because they will convince you.

Go for the treatment of your problems, not for the diagnosis. For that I recommend a psychologist, who will be able to do both. Don't expect answers in a first session or anything, go and be willing to talk.

>> No.3259864

>>3259858
How much would this cost? Can you see one on the nhs?

>> No.3259869

>>3259864
I really don't know about this as I'm not from the UK.

>> No.3259875

Fuck my girlfriend and I sortakinda broke up and I was depressed before and it was like fucking hell for a month and I couldn't do any work at all like I would stay up all night staring at my work and typing 3-4 sentences every hour. My girlfriend and I weren't working out cause she was having mental problems too (and would take out the frustration on me) so she was on her own for a while to see if she could sort stuff out and after a while she ended up talking to me and realizing that I helped her more than I hurt her and she wants to be with me and I do love her so much. But now I have this pile of completely unfinished work that I haven't turned in and it's so awful maybe I'm just lazy, I don't know but it feels like there's something evil I'm doing. I told one of my professors I was having problems but wanted to finish my work and turn it in at a later date and she said that was find and understood but I missed that date and just didn't say anything and I'm too scared to check my email, and I'm missing stuff for two other classes and it feels too insane for me to be able to do anything and now it's a week into break and instead of writing a novel I'm just freaking out about it again, fuck.

>> No.3259878

Not really bipolar or anything, but I am awfully lonely and this leads my mood to fluctuate from being okay with it to being miserable.

>> No.3259915

I don't but I know a girl with bipolar, she doesn't mention it much but she seems to do pretty well with it. I know another guy who has professionally diagnosed depression, a lot of the time you wouldn't notice because he loves to talk to people about stuff (especially books, he's my lit-friend).

>> No.3259918
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3259918

Hello, I'll specify hereby that I am female.

I will try to explain the complex psychological situation I am in, with familial background.

I live with my mother, which happens to be a hypersensible hysteric, with cases of obsessive psychosis, that I suspect she has develloped during her childhood because of her mother, that was a narcisssistic maniac. If you are acquainted with Myers Briggs Tests, my mother has been tested as an ISFJ.

I live also with my heterozygotus twin brother,
which happens to be an ISTP, which means that he has totally majorly carved his personality on my mother's hypersensibility and has now to deal with affection and attachment troubles with woman, especially since my mother is a hysteric with dominating tendencies. He'll be a momma's boy all his life, if he doesn't make a change soon.

my father has separated from my mother for obvious reasons along our seventh year of life;
As I recall him, he was an INTJ, an introverted rational thinker with good judgment skills, though not good enough to determine the future of his relationship with my mother.
I think I knew from early age the illness of my mother and subconsciously chose to pick on my father's personality rather than hers, being a woman. I managed to escape the oedipian complex this way;

>> No.3259919

>>3259915
*I don't have it

>> No.3259929
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3259929

>>3259918
con...
I am tested as an INxJ.
Growing up without my father, I was always taken as the outsider of the family because I was not too sensitive or emotional, but rather an intuitive rational person. This infuriated my mother whose constant desire of affection and attention was unsettled by my blunt resistance. I would react very detachedly to her hysteric crisis and dramatization of her every day life, and she would emotionally blackmail my brother into setting aside to her camp.
I did however receive a few support from my father, and uncle because I did not follow her path into hysteria.
It was not, and still isn't an easy thing to argument rationally and stay away from the hypersensible pitfall of anger, guilt and madness that my mother is trying to set up for me, as she believes as a woman, I must follow the same path, as she is unconscious of the nature of her illness.
I spend a lot of time alone to canalize peacefully and divert her twisted attentions, words towards a positive interpretation of her own sickness; that does not mean that I will indulge into emotional bribery in order to feel better, or to recognize the hysteric maniac persona that she displays only in the intimacy of the house as a respectable individual, as I expect the very same treatment that she displays to those who suit her interests, in the outside world.
She has undertoned lesbian tendencies, which result into her trying to seduct me passively into her hysteric mental masturbation, but I do not indulge into it neither, and that causes her great distress because she views this seduction as a way of coping from her lack of affection as a child..

>> No.3259931

>>3259918
>>3259929

I hope you realise that these Myers-Briggs tests are essentially worthless and incredibly unscientific.

>> No.3259933
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3259933

>>3259929

Well, I can say that I crossed a good cape, reaching twenty years old and being conscious of all of this, however the energy of processing and healing, protecting myself mentally from her is very draining, and I may have develloped minor depression, with a hint of obsessive nevrosis, that is rejecting the hysteric path of my mothers and breaking the hederitary spell that has been casted.

>> No.3259941
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3259941

>>3259931
I do realize they do not provide subsequent scientifical evidence, however here I mean to use them as a simplifying tool of understanding the personalities of my family.
There is much more complexity to this, that just sixty shades of Jung, indeed.

>> No.3259954
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3259954

>>3259941
I meant to say sixteen

>> No.3259956

>>3259931
>incredibly unscientific

And since when that was a bad thing?

>> No.3259979

>>3259956

Since, I don't know, forever.

>> No.3260076

>>3259933
Who don't you get the fuck out of there?

>> No.3260121

I find my bipolarity makes me more introverted, introspective and sullen at times, then gregarious, flamboyant, and happy.

I feel like it helps my writing. Also I find that weird things like music or pictures can completely change my mood sometimes for no reason. It's a little weird, but now that I'm older I can tap into these feelings better. This was, of course, hell for me when I was younger.

>> No.3260165
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3260165

>>3260076
Unfortunately, I do not have the financial means to sustain myself by the means of working, as I am following a full-time university education.
However, I do receive a student fund that is unconsequent, yet is used for the food/shelter expenses that my mother provides.
It is no five star hotel, though I could make much greater use of this few money, had I actually the capacity to access it. It happens that my mother has created a bank account in my name, which she uses to laundry her rent money, as she is a landlord to two small appartments in town, and escapes thus the state taxes of rents. I do not have access to this account, and fear I may be later accounted responsible for her deeds, but I have neither time nor energy to engage into any legal procedure at this time.
I am planning to ask for a student bedroom in a university residence next year, as I will have gathered all the administrative documents needed to settle my case as beneficiary, which I had to battle for with my mother, as she is very secretive of her economic and legal state. She happens to own very wealthy capital in estate, but does not work, and lives off rents and financial aids, which she obviously lies for.
As rich as she seems, she does not spend a dime on quality food, or any extra activities.
She gives me out of spite a few euros each week, for me to have coffee and cigarettes during classes.
I am definitely planning a long term departure in the close future, and wish to follow a correct procedure as not to end up on the streets.

>> No.3260329

>>3260165
>fear I may be later accounted responsible for her deeds
You are for not reporting it, I think.

Also, in which country are you? I first assumed you were American but I would guess that in Europe (France?) you could easily get all types of help?

>> No.3260359

>>3258871
bipolars can have psicosis outburst during manic episodes fyi.

>> No.3260361

C'mon guys. Those of you who believe this garbage, you must know mental illnesses are diagnosed in trends and that at least half of the Bipolar folk out there are just a bit moody?

>> No.3260364

>>3258860
you must be one of the most imbecil people in this board right now

>> No.3260369

>>3259369
sorry to hear that man, you are fucked for life.

>> No.3260371

>>3258860
>It's all in your head.
Yup. That's where the brain is, faggot.

>> No.3260372

>>3260121
Why is this considered bipolar?

>I'm not in the same frame of mind all the time
>Sometimes things outside of my own being alter my mood

My god, get this man some Valium. Something is horribly wrong with him.

>> No.3260389

Schizoid and narcissistic traits, also badly depressed but not on meds here.
Fuck pills, ill stick to psilocybin and weed.

>> No.3260408

>>3260389
>be schizoid
>use psychedelics
You want some whiskey for your liver failure as well?

>> No.3260411

>>3260372

I don't feel like allowing the world to influence you is a cause for medication.

I'd rather swing radically from one side to the other; knowing that when I'm down I'll be up, and when I'm up to enjoy the experience while it lasts than level myself out and not experience the world in a dynamic, thoughtful, and sometimes sullen way.

At this point it feeds me and propels my creativity.

>> No.3260419

>>3260408
I drink with moderation.
And I dont get your green text.

>> No.3260424

>>3260372
It's not. Actual bipolar disorder is being so manic that you are a risk for yourself and/or your environment and other times being so depressed that you are a risk to yourself and/or others.

Moodswings don't qualify for being called bipolar unless they are severely problematic.

>> No.3260433

>>3259516
>paying loads of money to to have conversations
>ishygddt

>> No.3260443

>>3259246
Me too man. I'm smarter than you as well. And girls flirt with me literally anytime I go out.

I have extreme anxiety though, but that's only because I'm so superior to everyone else.

Really.

>> No.3260464

>>3260433
>living in savage lands without social healthcare

>> No.3260470

>>3260419
Psychelics and cannabis have been shown to have the potential to trigger latent or increase existent mental disorders including schizofrenia and related disorders. So self-medicating with toadstools and hemp is among the last things you should do, even though this behaviour is common among the mentally deranged.

>> No.3260487

>>3260408
He's saying that mixing psychs with a personality that is schizoid/schizotypal is a poor decision, as is drinking with liver failure.

>> No.3260493

generalized anxiety disorder and light depression

>> No.3260501

>>3258816
You aren't bipolar.

>> No.3260498

I was for a long time but I seem to have grown out of it, which is nice.

On a semi-related note, I find it incredibly disturbing that people fetishize mental illness. Yes, it's somewhat tenuously linked to creativity but almost as if we're reducing a genuine problem down to a trope, and that is shitty.

>> No.3260610
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3260610

Is there a way to see a free shrink (sounds like an oxymoron) in the US? Specifically NY if possible? I don't want to tell my parents because they would become overly worried and not allow me to be. I don't know if I have anything since at times I just feel like its angst and other times I feel there is something deeply wrong with me but the fact that I've been wondering for over a year or two now I think says something. So is there anything I can do? I turn 18 in February.

>> No.3260627

>>3260610
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/21/health/21patient.html?_r=0

>> No.3260632

>>3258816

If you haven't been committed before you're not very mentally ill, sorry to burst your speshul snowlflake bubble.

I had a manic psychotic episode once but it never happened again, cognitive behavioral therapy seemed to get me over it, but I have been committed.

>> No.3260635

>>3260610
In Australia we have something called Beyond Blue. Not exactly a shrink but kind of like a counselling service you can call up and talk to for free. Not sure if they have anything like that in America though.

>> No.3260639

>>3258871

Bipolars can definitely hallucinate, especially if they've been awake for days due to mania. My bipolar friend heard voices and thought he was possessed. He was diagnosed as Bipolar I.

>> No.3260649

>>3259472

It won't effect your choice of jobs at all unless you want to work for the CIA or some shit. Medical records are confidential.

>> No.3260662

>>3260639
Bipolar here and I do hallucinate, brought on by bouts of psychotic depression.

I've been committed once before, too.

I also have borderline personality disorder. What a time I have.

>> No.3260665

Seeing this thread I would say that at least half of /lit/ has some mental disorder. We artistic now.

>> No.3260669

>>3260649

I'm in the UK so perhaps its different but over here if you don't declare and you fuck up at work you have no right to protection based on that.

>> No.3260680

bipolar II here with a large family history of OCD

having a mixed episode now I think
don't feel well at all

>> No.3260714

i've spent the entire day waiting for the lottery results. i told myself i would kill myself if i didn't win, and then told myself i wouldn't. i haven.t, yet, i probably won't, but maybe i should.

i've been to the doctors many times. i've been on medication, and to a therapist a few times. but i always break it off. recently i've been convinced that mental illness is largely a hoax, and that doctors will destroy my body and what is left of my mind. i think about going to the doctors often.

i think my most urgent condition is my loneliness and the fact that i contribute nothing to the world.

if i hadn't read such beautiful things today i would be beside myself, most likely now. as it is, i'm in the middle, stupefied, not really anything.

>> No.3260726

>>3260714
>i think my most urgent condition is my loneliness and the fact that i contribute nothing to the world.
These can both be fixed with a phonecall to some volunteering thing. Also, what diagnosis did you get/

>> No.3260744

>>3260726

i first went to the doctor when i was about 14 i think. i'd been seeing nosferatu in my bedroom and talking to him a lot. even when i was a kid i remember being frantic at times when there was a crowd of voices in my head. i'm not sure what anything is though, and there are large portions of myself that i'm not sure are real. the other day i noticed my skull had stretched at some point so that there was a protrusion.

i've been treated for a depression mainly a number of times. it's hard to talk about.

>> No.3260804

>>3260714
>i think my most urgent condition is my loneliness and the fact that i contribute nothing to the world.

Need help fixing that? Write. Write like you just have in that post. Write for hours. Then come back here and show us. Then revise.

Stream of consciousness from a bipolar mind... there's something that should be dipped in ink.

>> No.3260806

>>3260744
Good luck with it.

>> No.3260836

>>3259956
>>3259941
The Myers-Briggs test is not only not scientific, but also outside psychology itself. Don't fool yourselves. These online tests are absolutely worthless and I mean this in the most sensible and nice way I can access, not out of prejudice or anything. Don't listen to these tests, they do not tell anything about you besides the fact that you believe in what they say.

The Jungian types were USED by the test, but the test has nothing to do with anything he said about them.

>> No.3260887
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3260887

i don't suffer from mental illness, i suffer from the human condition

>> No.3260906

>>3260836
What's the difference? Psychology itself is just trial-and-error; it's therapists experimenting on patients; it's one step away from voodoo, and we all know it.

>> No.3260910

>>3260906
but it's interesting as hell

>> No.3260916

>>3259782
>(a) few, if any, activities, provide pleasure;
>(b) emotional coldness, detachment or flattened affectivity;
>(c) limited capacity to express either warm, tender feelings or anger towards others;
>(d) apparent indifference to either praise or criticism;
>(e) little interest in having sexual experiences with another person (taking into account age);
>(f) almost invariable preference for solitary activities;
>(g) excessive preoccupation with fantasy and introspection;


sounds like your average scandinavian

>> No.3260948

>>3260906
Psychology is not that at all. The difference lies in the very fact that you are talking with someone session after session about personal matters. Psychology, like language, works over the reality of contextualization. A solitary dream means nothing, a single session hardly say anything about you, a slip of tongue is just one thing that is irrelevant if you don't associate with other things. A generic virtual test has nothing to do with psychology, even when you are talking about what people have in common.

It's really bizarre that people think this way in this thread. On one side you have those who disregard the entire field, call a conspiracy on mental illness, say it's all fake, etc. On the other side you have those who consider it but then again, they only consider it by taking tests online and looking for symptoms for diseases. Psychology doesn't fit either side. Therapists do not experiment on patients, even though it is wise to give an individual "customized" treatment.

The first thing you guys need to understand is that a diagnosis is nothing. These things are not treated like ordinary diseases or disorders because they are always put in relation to the problem that is posed. We are talking about personal identity, there is nothing wrong in being like this or that so there is nothing to be fixed. A good therapist does not deviate from the problem to create more problems (eg, feeling guilty about your condition).

>> No.3260966

>>3260916
I wheezed into my chest

>> No.3260969

>>3260887
Being aware of this is mental illness. Learn2normalfag

>> No.3260970

>>3260906
If voodoo can get me better money than disability checks then by all means let's go slaughter some black chickens.

>> No.3261057

>>3259169
>>3259188
everything is about 4 lines long and is bad but ok here we go

you don't know what you know
you don't know what you do

*********************************

You like me you hate me
you don't know me you show me

*********************************

I have the power to see
Anyone that has the power to see me

***************************

I have to think of my head as really big
and my body as really small
for all of this to fit
in this tv sized roll

**********************

you want to write a book but not all the way to the end
you'll write the text but won't click send
you can't cook but you know how to defend
you know where the rhyme is but you don't know how to write it

*******************
(my favourite)

oxbow lake stuck in the sand
she never thought we would give a damn
squeezing hard she holds my heart
silence is such a simple art

******************************

Hold true your heart beats faster
evil lurks my hand at laughter
my blue all together singing a chorus
it hurts the same to a drum

******
I wrote all of these when I was 18 and in really bad shape too so be nice

>> No.3261065

>>3260470
Schizoid is not the same as Schizophrenia.
I'm fucked up, but I'm not delusional.

>> No.3261110

>>3261065
See "and related disorders". Self-medicating with street drugs, especially psychedelics and cannabis, is not a good idea.