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/lit/ - Literature

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573562 No.573562 [Reply] [Original]

ITT we briefly summarize the plot of a book that, while technically true, ignores any existing thematic or tonal elements and puts in the entire story in a new light.

Kafka's Metamorphosis: Lonely workaholic lusts after little sister, dies from an apple.

>> No.573569

>in the
Ignore that.

>> No.573579

>>573569
>and puts entire story in a new light.
Now it's missing an article.
What now?

>> No.573582
File: 165 KB, 640x1097, shurggg.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
573582

Some dude runs a railroad and rapes bitchz.

>> No.573634

The Stranger: Sun forces Frenchman to kill Muslims.

>> No.573657

>>573582
The Fountainhead Shrugged?

>> No.573697

>>573657
who knows I never read either one

>> No.573702

The Godfather
A young man learns the family business and lives happily ever after

>> No.573704

wuthering heights adoption doesn't always work out

>> No.573708

>>573697

It's pretty funny because in The Fountainhead, Howard Roark rapes Dominique.

>> No.573711

>>573562

Catch-22

Self-absorbed soldier refuses to help his fellow troops during the war

>> No.573720

>Dracula
A foreign noble moves to England and is brutally murdered by the xenophobic locals for his strange customs.

>> No.573725

The Road
A man and his son walk around judging whether others are good or bad and eating cans of peaches

>> No.573754

>lord of the rings
a short bloke throws stolen jewelry into a volcano

>> No.573764

Kafka on the Shore:
Kid fucks mom and an old man talks to cats.

>> No.573765

House of Leaves: An unhappy man sleeps with women and reads notes. Also, a photographer has marriage problems.

>> No.573771

The Great Gatsby:
A young man tags along with his partying friend who is trying to get some with a certain girl

Sounds like Super Bad

>> No.573774

Pride and Prejudice: 18th century bitches do nothing

>> No.573790

>>573771
Super Bad is a rip-off of The Great Gatsby.

>> No.573816

>Invisible Man
A southern black man goes to New York.

>> No.573826
File: 127 KB, 375x543, the_bell_jar_harper_71.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
573826

Girl gets a job in New York then goes back home in Massachusetts

>> No.573833

Tokyo: A nerd endangers her friends while trying to steal a fetus.

>> No.573839

Invisible Monsters:
Tranny acts like a celebrity


oh wait.

>> No.573867

Siddhartha: Life style experiments that end by seeing dead people in a river.

>> No.573877

The Sun Also Rises: Friends go to a party together and have a swell time.

>> No.573956
File: 67 KB, 500x752, 1222433_090503163741_fellowship.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
573956

Once, long ago, some asshole stole a piece of jewelry. Instead of returning it to its rightful owner he hoarded it for himself, didn't even tell his own relatives about the priceless trinket. Finally, many years later, the now very aged man was visisted by an old friend, who told him that he had to stop being a greedy dick and give the stupid thing up. The man finally gave in, but neither of them wanted to give the unfathomably expensive and invaluable piece of jewelry up. So they call over this kid and tell him to go journey to a volcano and trash it so that the original owner will never get it back.

>> No.573959

The Neverending Story: A boy gets into figths, steals and skips class. His father forgives him.

>> No.573967

>>573956

Now now. If you're going to do it, at leastr do it right.
Here's all of Tolkiens Mythology:


A God creates a bunch of angels, one of the angels turns and becomes bad. He takes another of the angels as his servant and goes down to earth. Some other Gods object and also mortalize themselves and descend to earth, whereupon they engage in a war which.....


It's impossible to do briefly. ;_;

>> No.574019
File: 61 KB, 640x848, Dune-Game-1-PC.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
574019

The protagonist is forced to choose between the woman he loves, and the woman he is expected to marry. Things get spicy! Good beach read.

>> No.574033

Wheel of Time: Crazy guy is reborn to fight the devil and has a harem.

>> No.574040

>>574019
>things get spicy

lol'd

>> No.574045

>>573967
I think the point is missing the point.

Tolkien mythology:
A god sings an awesome song, but a lesser god sings awful and ruins it for everyone.

>> No.574090

LET THE SPICE FLOW!

>> No.574095

The Dark Tower Cycle: Some guys make sure that Stephen King writes a series of books called the Dark Tower Cycle

Dude, meta.

>> No.574123

Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy:

Humans are worthless, and the rest of the galaxy is full of assholes.

>> No.574127

The Giver trilogy: BLUE EYES MASTER RACE

>> No.574128

I, robot:
Two technicians have to deal with experimental, poorly supported hardware. A software analyst risks important projects to prove that she is right.

>> No.574134

Virgin Suicides: A couple horny boys try to get with some girls but the girls kill themselves.

>> No.574139

The Bible:

a bunch of middle easterners stone, rape and pillage everything, and are generally dicks

then some dude from nazareth performs various magic tricks and gets killed by romans

>> No.574152

Twilight: Girl has HS romance with boy. He's a vampire though so things are complicated.

New Moon: Boy breaks up with girl so she throws herself over a hill to get him to come back.

Eclipse: Girl has to decide if she wants the cute vampire of the cute werewolf.

New Moon: Girl marries Vampire and has a vampire Baby Alien Movie style. She turns into a vampire and the werewolf turns into a pedophile.

>> No.574155

>>574152
Last one was Breaking Dawn.

>> No.574161

>>574139

also: An asshole writes a bunch of letters, and a bad acid trip gets put to paper the morning after.

>> No.574173

>Harry Potter
Kid gets into a magic school and fucks shit up and marries a ginger.

also, OP's picture is intimidating.

>> No.574202

Shogun: A sailor learns japanese in exchange of teaching a japanese how to build boats.

>> No.574213

Grendel:

A whiny momma's boy whines incessantly and then gets violently murdered.

>> No.574222

Shoplifting from American Apparel:

>> No.574223

Crime and Punishment Some dude kills to ladies and feels bad and goes batshit insane

>> No.574235

Hoot:
owls

>> No.574238

Gravity's Rainbow: German pervert puts a boy inside a rocket and launches it.

>> No.574240

>>574128

That's only like a third of the book.

>> No.574249

The Man Who Was Thursday: A man dreams of smiting a close friend of his by cheating him out of his rightful position in a political activist group. These desires are repressed, and they continue to debate over both social and political philosophies as companions.

>> No.574259

The Brothers Karamazov:
Just like Clue, but also features monks, bitches, and schoolchildren.

>> No.574268
File: 35 KB, 431x648, oldmanswar.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
574268

An elderly writer relives his youth; in doing so, he learns to love his wife all over again. But as the universe conspires against the star-cross'd lovers, they need to ask the question: will they ever find a place where they can live in peace?

>> No.574276

American Psycho: A fashionable yuppie forgets to return some videotapes.

>> No.574277
File: 34 KB, 316x463, homer1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
574277

A dog awaits the return of its long lost master.

>> No.574281

War and Peace:
A teenage girl seduces men old enough to be her father.

>> No.574304

>>574019
first time actually laughing out loud at lit in a long time. kudos good sir.

>> No.574370

>>574277

Glorious.

The Iliad: A privileged young man feels his elders do not recognize and respect his worth and abilities.

I've used these before:

La Philosophie dans le Boudoir: A father asks his friends to educate his daughter about morality and politics.
Eugenie de Franval: A father goes to extraordinary lengths to show his love for his daughter.
120 Days of Sodom: A group of friends meets to talk about their common interests.

>> No.574382

Crime and Punishment

Guy kills an old woman for her stuff, gets arrested.

>> No.574383

The Caryatids: one bitch makes five bitches. they hate each other. mother bitch dies in orbit.

>> No.574389

the 120 Days of Sodom:

four established gentlemen listen to amusing stories, then begin to experience some problems with their servants.

>> No.574390

>>574370

Improved: The Iliad: A privileged young man feels his elders do not recognize and respect his worth and abilities, and sets out to prove them wrong.

>> No.574397

The Aeneid: A group of refugees from a Middle Eastern war-zone find Europe less than welcoming to asylum-seekers.

>> No.574398

Ulysses: A man wanders around the streets of Dublin, then comes back home and plants his face in his wife's ass.

>> No.574399
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574399

A British king fucks his sister, then gets cuckolded by his best friend for half a century, then the freakish offspring of his wincest kills him.

>> No.574400

Hamlet:
A rebellious young man acts unbecomingly to suppress his Oedipal complex.

>> No.574408

>>574139

So fucking edgy . . .

>> No.574410

Dante's Inferno: a poet goes to hell, makes the damned feel even worse about their situation.

>> No.574412

Candide: Ridiculously unfortunate man ignores all advice, becomes a gardener.

>> No.574413 [DELETED] 

The Hobbit: A consortium of industrialists, assitsed by a consultant, recruits a specialist to deal with a serious worm infestation.

>> No.574415
File: 43 KB, 400x300, nwtk1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
574415

Starship Troopers:

Bunch of a Fascists in Armor kill bugs

(Holyshit thats movie O_o)

>> No.574421

The Hobbit: A consortium of industrialists, assisted by a part-time consultant, recruits a specialist to deal with a serious worm infestation.

>> No.574422

Song of Fire and Ice: Every one of your favorite characters die.

>> No.574427

Orlando: An account of the long, rich, and varied life of an aristocrat.

>> No.574431
File: 14 KB, 256x270, 1238381146906.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
574431

>>574421

>> No.574434

>>574399

That's not funny that's just an accurate summary of the book.

>> No.574444

Midnight's Children: A dude with a giant nose confronts an arch-enemy with big knees and makes some chutney.

>> No.574449

Dune:

Drug wars in space.

>> No.574457

1984: Guy with a fucked up ulcer realizes that he hates society, then at the end he realizes that he loves it.

>> No.574478

The Picture of Dorian Gray: A work of art faithfully reflects the life its subject.

>> No.574482

Death on the Installment Plan
Kid grows up in Paris then has to get jobs and he meets a scientist.

>> No.574492

Breakfast of Champions:
So this rich guy who sells cars is going nuts and meanwhile there's a writer who has a hard-on for mirrors or something coming to a writing conference.

>> No.574494

Crime and punishment: crazy motherfucker is crazy

>> No.574513

The Koran:

DEATH TO EVERYONE

and god will be angry if you eat bacon and shave your beard while drinking beer

bitches aint nothing but hoes and tricks

>> No.574514

Of mice and Men: guy likes to kill retards

>> No.574520

>>574478
>The Picture of Dorian Gray: A work of art faithfully reflects the life *of* its subject.

His Dark Materials: An adolescent girl goes on a journey, in the course of which she finds love and reconciles her separated parents.

>> No.574545

100 Years of Solitude
About a crazy family in a village.

The Lord of the Rings
A gay dwarf couple looking to return faulty jewelry.

The Birth of Tragedy
Wagner fanfiction

The Wind-up Bird Chronicle
About a lost cat.

All the works of Arthur Schopenhauer
The light-hearted banter of a man filled with the joy of being.

9/11 Commission
An epic tale of heroic young men on a final mission from God.

>> No.574553

>>574513
>>while technically true
>>DEATH TO EVERYONE

You know absolutely nothing.

>> No.574568 [DELETED] 

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: An Englishman experiences difficulties with the construction industry and planning authorities.

PS. I don't think >>574513 is in the spirit of OP's request, but it does remind me: comparisons are frequently made between the pleasures of sex and those of chocolate, but they usually overlook one very important difference - the pope does not object if you wear a comdom while eating chocolate.

>> No.574580

Murder on the Orient Express: A group of people decides to take a memorable journey together on a famous train.

>> No.574593

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: An Englishman experiences difficulties with the construction industry and planning authorities.

PS. I don't think >>574513 is either accurate or in the spirit of OP's request, but it does vaguely remind me: comparisons are frequently made between the pleasures of sex and those of chocolate, but they usually overlook one very important difference - the pope does not object if you wear a condom while eating chocolate.

>> No.574594

>>574545
>The Lord of the Rings
>A gay dwarf couple looking to return faulty jewelry.
Thanks, I laughed. Mostly because it's true.

>> No.574599

>>574553
you're right I don't even know how to read that's I'm on this board

and the koran says nothing about killing apostates or blasphemers or foreigners or unfaithful women etc. etc. etc.

>too lazy to cite direct quotes and fuck you anyway this aint a high school debate

>> No.575057

>>574599
Alright, keep your pants on, mate.
Just trying to quell ignorant levels.

...on
....4chan....

>> No.575059

>Captain Blood
A guy is being awesome.

>> No.575071

A Confederacy of Dunces: An overweight man searches for a job.

>> No.575073

A Life Of Pi: Young Indian boy loses weight.

>> No.575079

The Sound and the Fury: A bunch of brothers all want to fuck their sister.

>> No.575082

>>573562
>lonely workaholic becomes an hikkimori and lusts after his little sister.

>> No.575087

Odyssey: Man journeys home from a long business trip, takes a wrong turn, meets a slut, bangs slut, finds his wife has let a bunch of men in the household. Proceeds to rage.

>> No.575090

Macbeth: Guy chooses hoes before bros. Ends up getting killed

>> No.575092

>>575079
Bravo, sir, you made my morning.

>> No.575097

>>573562
Didn't Clerks II do this one... better...?

>> No.575101

1001 nights: whore uses her tricks in bed to get a man to stay with her

>> No.575103

A Song of Ice and Fire: a tall man gets a new job.

>> No.575105
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575105

Plato's Republic: Fictional tale in which the author jerks off over discussing politics and philosophy with a dead philosopher he is in love with

>> No.575106

>>575105
Isn't that every Plato dialogue?

>> No.575109

>>575106
point taken

>> No.575112

>>575103

?????????

>> No.575118

a song of ice and fire: two families come to terms with the death of their father figures

>> No.575122
File: 70 KB, 449x594, 53_abelincoln.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
575122

A Song of Ice and Fire:
<------------------------------

>> No.575123

Catcher in the Rye:
A young man has wacky adventures in New York.

>> No.575151

Nineteen Eighty-Four: Delinquent undergoes a painful rehabilitation process but thankfully becomes a better citizen.

>> No.575178

Moby-Dick: Captain wants to fuck a whale badly enough to put his crew's life at risk.

>> No.575217

Slaughter House 5
Poetic justice is served to a xenophobic barbershop quartet.

>> No.575218

Brave New World: A man unhappy with his life makes friends with a young foreigner. Eventually, he gets to travel to the arctic.

>> No.575228

The Moon is a Harsh Mistress
Randites achieve their aims through state terrorism.

>> No.575229

2001:
An enthusiast researcher, going to mission for the first time, is trusted with a secret that eventually will drive him to murder.

>> No.575233

A Clockwork Orange: A passionate young music lover has an opportunity to reassess his priorities.

>> No.575236

Lolita: A man goes on a cross-country journey with his step-daughter.

>> No.575240

Lolita: A literary gentleman with idiosyncratic tastes enjoys a tour of the USA with his step-daughter..

>> No.575242

>>575236

Great minds think alike, anon!

>> No.575248

The End of Eternity:
A man lefts his job after meeting a girl in a business trip.

>> No.575255

Apuleius' Metamorphoses: Excessive curiosity leads a man to make an ass of himself.

>> No.575260

The three musketeers:
A man sees his ex-wife for the first time in years. He decides to have a talk with her, so they can come to a closure with their unfinished business.

>> No.575270

Frankenstein: An emo son just wants daddy to love him

>> No.575296

>Frankenstein: An emo daughter just wants daddy to love her
Fixed.
>Frankenstein: An emo authoress just wants her father-figure writer-lover to love her
Double fixed.

>> No.575299

The Wasp Factory: Teenage girl digs the occult.

Anna Karenina: Woman catches train.

>> No.575301

Odyssey: Son finds hobo father.

>> No.575302

Belgariad & Malloreon: Same shit keeps on happening

>> No.575303

1984: Sibling rivalry is amicably resolved.

>> No.575305

Battle Royale: Gifted student chafes under modern school system.

>> No.575309

Prince of Nothing Trilogy: Man trades lover for younger model.

>> No.575310

>>575305
That's actually the subtext though.

>> No.575315

The Man Who Was Thursday: Police overstaffing proves problematic.

>> No.575316

Hamlet: emo son contemplates suicide because of his fucked up family

>> No.575317

The dead: irish married couple experience and midlife crisis

Canterbury tales: bored travelers tell drunken tales to one another

>> No.575325

>>575315

YEEESSS!

Our Man In Havana: A secret agent under pressure from his superiors delivers the information they desire.

>> No.575326

Cry the Beloved Country: Priest travels to big city, sees shit

>> No.575327

Running out of time: fundamentalists who don't believe in medicine nearly kill off their entire village

>> No.575329

Watchmen: A group of old friends are brought together by the death of one of their own and try to relive the good old days.

>> No.575340

number the stars: a girl tries to help her criminal friend free from the law.

>> No.575342

>>575340
In addendum: Night: an autobiography of a boys time in prison

>> No.575356

Sandman: Goth guy an heros

>> No.575360

Wait a minute...
I've seen this exact thread before, somewhere else...

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BetterThanItSoundsLiterature

>> No.575361

Lord of the Flies: Rowdy kids on an island make a feast.

>> No.575369
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575369

Catcher In The Rye: Kid gets expelled, complains alot till a little girl tells him to STFU he then almost gets raped, watches little girl on carosel and never finds out about the ducks

>> No.575414

>>575361
Fat kid dies.

>> No.575491

The Raw Shark Texts : Amnesia leads a man tthrough exciting adventures to a conceptual island.

>> No.575496

Only Revolutions : Two teenagers gallivant around the US and learn that they are the only people who matter.

>> No.575520

The Iliad: Woman gets seduced and brought to a new land, her homeland then rapes her new land in the asshole hairs.

>> No.575528

Death of a salesman (since I know you fags like scripts too): r9k all grown up

Catcher in the Rye: Phony

>> No.575614

Notes from Underground: Man thinks for a bit and tells a story about a memorable drunken night out he had with his old school-friends.

Blood Meridian: Young boy travels America and recieves hug from his mysterious travelling companion.

Moby-Dick: Whilst on a boat journey a man loses his wooden leg several times and encounters a whale.

A Farewell to Arms: American man is hit by bomb whilst eating cheese.

>> No.575617

Catch 22: A man battles a long, malingering liver disease.

>> No.575641

The Bible: A Jew won't shut up so some people kill him and comes back as a zombie and still keeps on talking.

>> No.575642

>>574139

heh im an atheist im smarter than dumb christians hehe i read richard dawkins

>> No.575662

Herodotus' Histories: Kill sandniggers!

>> No.575666

After dark by Murakami: A freakin sleepless girl and a sleeping girl who wouldn't wake up and there's no point at all.

>> No.575677

>>575662
thats not even thechnically true.

>> No.575688

Catcher in the Rye:
A whiny teen whines about how lame he is.

Any Tom Clancy novel:
Tom Clancy thinks you should vote Republican.

>> No.575698

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest:

Army nurse helps mental defectives, with medication and surgery

>> No.575703
File: 38 KB, 300x475, wuthering.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
575703

don't pick on your brother just because he's adopted, because he'll come back to fuck everything up for everybody

>> No.575705
File: 37 KB, 293x500, of_mice_and_men.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
575705

dreams are nice. reality isn't

>> No.575707
File: 35 KB, 316x480, n296196.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
575707

''man, all women just want to change me into something I'm not!'' said the douchebag

>> No.575709

Animal Farm:

A group of pigs take over a farm, making it more efficient than ever to the envy of the neighboring farmers.

>> No.575735

>>575703
>>575705
>>575707
>>575528

ITT tripfags doing it wrong

>> No.575753

Love in the Time of Cholera:

Dude waits like 80 years to bang out this slut that he was in love with as a kid, but not before he fucks like 600 chicks.

>> No.575783

Das Kapital:

Capitalism is self-perpetuating and workers get sad.

>> No.575876

>>575316

i'll do you one better, Hamlet is indecisive.

>> No.575892

>>573816
(now actually done in accordance with OP's guidelines)

Invisible Man
A pathological hoarder, after pursuing a variety of odd jobs, drives a spear into a schizophrenic racist

>> No.575904

>>575735
>>575735

he's from /co/, what do you expect?
go back to your picturebooks faggot.

>> No.575912

Out: Lady kills her husband, drags her friends into this shit. What a bitch.

>> No.575948

House of Leaves: ˙ʎʇıuɐs sıɥ ʇqnop ɹǝuoן ɐ sǝʞɐɯ ʍǝıʌǝɹ ǝıʌoɯ ןɐuoıʇɔıɟ ɐ

>> No.575960

Catcher in the Rye: Boy gets kicked out of school and deals with the alienation of being crazy.

>> No.576409

Fahrenheit 451: A fireman turns out not to like fires after all.

>> No.576416

Dune:
People work in the desert.

>> No.576421

The Hobbit:
Some people go steal some treasure, and then argue about who gets what.

>> No.576423

A Picture of Dorian Gray:
The Original Kodak Moment

>> No.576431

>No Bananafish
>Am dissapoint

>>575228
OH FUCK YOU.

>> No.576454

The Dark Tower Series: After the death of his beloved Susannah, Roland Deschain embarks on a sojourn to find himself again; along the way he meets some kooky friends, including (but not limited to) a legless black woman and a talking squirrel. Things get whacky!