/lit/ - Literature

>>15169263
Fire=clear sighted living, painful life
Meteor showers=astronomical fortune telling connotation
rain=pleasure
clouds=blindness induced by pleasure
current=time, movement through life
scale=choice between pain and pleasure
Pain and pleasure must constantly be swaying. It's the way things must be. Balance would entail the end of the song, the final flourish, the crescendo of life.

>>15168855
When you write something scant and very minimal you are trying for maximal effect, a compactness of meaning and you need tremendous impact in order to make a 3 liner work.

>>15168847
The first paragraph is huuuugely improved. So much more smooth of an intro. Good job.

>>15168772
Big thumbs up. Self conscious in the most healthy sense, effortless, shows the targets you're trying for and hitting them accurately. "Unc's shit himself again," made me laugh my fucking ass off good job you beautiful motherfucker keep it up

>>15168711
Big thumbs down waaaaay too dark.
If you want to have some really dark thing you either depict it straight up with a harrowing frankness or you make it beautiful. The horror and darkness is all about tension whereas humor is all about release. The humor sabatoges the tension, the tension sabatoges the humor. Doesn't work.

>>15168133
Very fucked up and disturbing while also managing to be domestic and mundane. I don't think it's necessarily a good thing, but definitely hard to achieve.
At the end of paragraph 1 you switch to second person which seems like its on purpose I guess but I am unaware of what your purposes are. You don't want to insert me into the story, you want to insert me into the character. Also "denoting an entertainment service" just seems too autistic. We all know what it is, what that means, what it looks like. Making something that is so obvious and so normal in our lives seem like alien object being looked at under a microscope doesn't contribute to the unsettling tone, it's like driving a car with square wheels. It's bumpy and unwieldy, and fake profound.

>>15168034
Very british and therefore very gay. I like the singsong rhythm, the tireless energy. The thing is definitely breathing, but this abundance of energy can be hard to sustain in the long term. Think about some dramatic detours you can take, some shift in tone, to give the thing a life. Very good overall I really like it. But I am not proud of liking it.

>>13084718
Also a vignette about a fat hairy New York City Lebanese stock brocker giving a monologue in a hookah bar about how his family escaped the lebanese civil war only to be killed in 9/11

I am writing a novel about a dreamlike vacation tour of Europe where the 21 year old protagonist falls for a 15 year old girl.
At the end she is raped by a band of Muslim refugees and the protagonist is arrested for it.

>>12826641
Ah, I'm glad to see an African gentleman educating himself on the finer productions of the white male mind. I would be acting disingenuously if I admitted that I had ever made love with an African (I would be on the bottom, of course), but I have read Roxeannne Gay, so I can say with some authority that I know what it would be like atleast to be suffocated by beautiful ebony bbw. It is one thing to oppress with a white phallus, something else entirely to take in the seed of a black body. Black bodies are strong and powerful. European stock crumbles and is fragile under the musty sexual dominance of a throbbing erect black man in the prime of his life. A world would come crashing down on me if I could have the privilege (no I am not trying to be smart) of a cultured phallus rocking in and out of me. Please OP be that man for me. Only violently and wild seize me down to the depths of what I deserve. FUCK MY WIFE OP. FUCK ME AND MY WIFE SO I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY I WAS NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

https://archive.org/stream/ThreeStories-J.D.Salinger/Three%20Stories%20-%20J.%20D.%20Salinger#page/n1/mode/2up

>>10061823
This.
Coming from someone who took 3 years of German in college

I've been a paralegal for five years. It's honestly a decent job.

The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire by Edward Gibbon

How do I get publishers interested in me? Is it by being Jewish? Or gay?

>What School do you go to
University of North Texas
>Major?
English, Focus in Writing and Rhetoric
>Brief description of social life (fucked up
stories welcome)
(I'll skip this one for me)
>What are your political views
>Also pretty much anything else about you would ike to rant about
>Also no comfy fags

>>9026341
HAHAHAHAHA

Like how Jesus died on the cross, I will read and critique all of your writing whether it's prose or verse.
I'll keep this up until 11PM Central US Time. Any posts after that I won't be able to critique, as I'll be asleep.

>>5522414
>my grunt
What the fuck is wrong with you. You are the craziest 12 year old I have ever seen on this board.
>>5522381
It's just a matter of growing up, especially if you're trying to write as a teen.
If not try to replace your addiction. I'd suggest marijuana, preferably sativa, but don't try to write while stoned, wait until you come down from the high to start writing. It worked for almost everyone. Don't treat each high as some journey or adventure you go down, or else you'll be tempted to increase the amounts you smoke each time, and soon you'll be as disillusioned with it as you are your internet addiction.

After a while you'll get sad enough or do enough drugs to choose to write.

It probably won't differ that much. PTA said that he transcribed the book into a script before he modified the story in any way.

Infinite Jest
2666

>>5496127
We've sniffed you out. Run!

>>5494319
Of course. That's the point of this thread.