/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

>>65977335
>I'm like, mother fucker, no one cares who you are till you write the smut! It keeps happening!
Heh. Some things never change.

>>9569151
Sincerely a great mood lifter.
>>9569461
Hey, you fixed the formatting. Nice touch right away. An initial criticism I have is that the single line break for dialogue is a little jarring at first, but otherwise it's a marked improvement. This line: "The small blonde abruptly cuts you off and swerves to the left and you follow her dutifully, stepping on a wet newspaper and almost skidding," feels odd to me. Might be too many "ands". It's a recurring issue later on, like when Anon blinks after Amelia nearly gets pasted. Turning it into another small sentence or using some other form of punctuation could do a lot to help with the flow of the story, cut down on repetition, even if "and" is one of the most used words. Also going to echo the sentiment of "don't burn yourself out". It's a noble goal, but don't try to timegate yourself. You aren't being paid for this. Just work at a pace that makes you comfortable, and ensures you aren't being rushed. A rushed story will always be of lesser quality due to the circumstances of its creation. Looking forward to more!