/wg/ - Writing General - Contest Edition IX

[Anonymous No.]

This is the writing thread, for all of your fanfiction needs and desires. We’re currently hosting the /vt/ Writing Rumble, a writing contest for the whole board to get involved in. The info page & contest archive can be found here: rentry.org/WGWC

Check the main archive below for everything the thread has put out so far, ranging from SFW to NSFW, fluff to tragedy, small literary works and shitposts alike!
https://script.google.com/macros/s/AKfycbxZVzygb0QjJ6hksAEYzCbLCegxsjhui97BB73qzPvU7GgJv6fXdAPmmIv6Qt9H5d5Fzg/exec

>"Isn't this just you fuckers writing fanfiction?"
Yes.

Previous thread: >>55794920, wherein Nene received lots of well-deserved love.
/wg/ rentry: https://rentry.org/wgrentry/

[Anonymous No.]

Story anchor.
Let’s see it.

[Anonymous No.]

/VT/ WRITING RUMBLE STORY ANCHOR
Reply to this post with your contest submissions.
Submissions are now open, and close on 08/25. Rules, submitted stories and other information can be found at:
rentry.org/WGWC

[Anonymous No.]

Do you have a story you'd like to see written? Reply to this post with it! Try to be as clear and concise as possible; the better you describe your idea, the more likely it is to be picked up!

Consider forwarding your prompt to the prompt archive to keep your idea safe and alive forever! No information is gathered - it's all completely anonymous. Use the form below:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScgcr8y7I9NUta22Ni0gFvS51veG5_7XjJrVD1BvJqDtX5_sQ/viewform

Curious to see the prompt archive? Check it out here if you need a little more inspiration!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/u/3/d/e/2PACX-1vR5ZggiHWXX_WSqCC5bvPR2QeLFGNMTjlgk6MuxmoVdRUIepkJa7PUlJAQ5RzHkZM_hhthLLXjab9Dt/pubhtml?gid=1162270883&single=true

[Anonymous No.]

Story recap!

There was 1 story posted last thread.

Thug Hunter: >>55806301
Tags: Botan, NePoLaBo, SFW, western, comedy

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897853
Ignore that, there were actually 2.

Thug Hunter: >>55806301
Tags: Botan, NePoLaBo, SFW, western, comedy

HoloJourneys The Parallel Pages: Advent’s Archiver: >>55810192
Tags: Shiori, NSFW

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897657
Thank you for the thread bread.

[Anonymous No.]

Ahh, freshly baked, artisan bread...

[Anonymous No.]

What's the appeal of giantess/size difference stuff, how many people here enjoy that sort of thing, and what would you like to see if somebody wrote it?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
The power difference.
>what would you like
Living as a little pet for my chuuba who loves me and could crush me with one finger.
Then one day she accidentally sits on me, I dance and sing as my soul exits my body, for I had the greatest death of all

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
So I had this question myself a lot. When it comes to giantess I'm told that the appeal is in the comfort of being in the care of someone who can step on or demolish anything that would harm you. Also it seems comfy to just ride on someone's shoulder. I used those kinda appeals in regards to interacting with Sana.
Size difference in the context of women a foot or two taller than you, or shorter, is just fun variety. The types of physical positions you both can get in can greatly widen and enhance the fun in that scenario.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
I never really bought into the fetish, but the thought of being a giant girl's tiny companion does seem kind of nice.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
While i dont enjoy it, the manga "chieri love is 8 meters" painted a great picture on whats interesting for the fetish.
In a way, its similar to futa. Sure the main appeal is a dick in a girl, but its the angles that kind of explore the fetish.
Giantess usually gets associated with Vore and/or destruction, but it can also be about female anatomy (like napping on their boobs), about extreme size difference that brings up the gap moe (like a tiny fairy girl being the dominant in a relationship) or even about sweat (Big clothes=Big stink)

Id say that as long as you are earnest and present the fetish in an interesting way, people will read it

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
Personally I like Size Difference both ways, though I'm not interested in the extremes.

The constant struggle of liking older taller women but disliking /ss/ and finding suitable stuff because of that exacts such a mental toll that even a Vietnam vet would feel bad for me

[Anonymous No.]

>>55900642
Would you be into ageplay if your amazoness gf wanted to roleplay?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55900737
depends on what age she'd want me to pretend to be. 'Young, fresh-faced, starry-eyed, just started high school'? Sure, why not. 'Literally just a fourth grader'? Get bent.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55900900
>He didn't have thoughts of his older sister's friend molesting him on 4th grade
ngmi

[Anonymous No.]

Mori is the one chuuba who is into short boys so im taking her.
Tall girl Banzai!

[Anonymous No.]

>>55899422
>what's the appeal
Big girl hot. It can be kind of an amplifier for underlying fetishes. And there's a huge power dynamic if you want to go a more dominate route.
>how many people here enjoy that kind of thing
I've written some giantess stuff in the past and I don't remember much of a response in either direction
>what would you like to see
Any take on the premise would be fun to read. Though I'd prefer at least one section focusing on butt

[Anonymous No.]

>>55901153
Weird that you mention that because my family keeps telling me that older sister's friend that she's had since the fourth grade is single now. I don't know what they expect me to do with that information because I've had like maybe a dozen conversations with her in the entire time she's known my sister, and I don't think she's my type anyway.

I'm also taller than her now so that magic wouldn't be there either

>>55901485
No! I call dibs! Just as soon as I get the controversial and dangerous shortening surgery to lose a couple inches

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897853
SEX SEX SEX
SEX WITH CHEERLEADER NENE
ASSPLAPING
HEADPATTING
SEX

[Anonymous No.]

On the topic of ageplay/age difference, what are the best fics for /ss/ or loli enthusiasts? Regular age difference like lost and found or TB17A are welcome as well.

[Anonymous No.]

Does anyone want to explore a giant chuuba's vagina like a cave?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55902034
Ride or Auntie's little secret.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55901802
>. I don't know what they expect me to do with that information
They're trying to play matchmaker.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55901802
Nice try buddy but you are outgunned
Im the short guy who is okay with being short AND i have tall friends
I will romance the autismo cringe rapper and i will love her

[Anonymous No.]

>>55904548
Won't you be looked down upon?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55902640
I'm beginning to suspect a giantess fetish is born out of a sense of adventure, climbing great mountains, tunneling into deep caves, risking pools of stomach acid for the joy of exploration.
I still don't quite understand, but I think I'm close.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55904719
CARLOS YOU SPIC FUCK

[Anonymous No.]

>>55901612
god i wish that were me

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897790
Polka cumming from just ear stimulation

[Anonymous No.]

>>55907930
I'm gonna add rigorous tail rubbing to that too.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55907930
https://archive.palanq.win/vt/thread/45899678/#45934369

I knew that prompt sounded familiar..

[Anonymous No.]

I'm awake! What did I miss!?

[Anonymous No.]

Is Fubuki's underwear canonically light blue?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55912346
You'd have to dig deep into old 3ds to possibly find that out. Best I remember is that Mio's is black, but everyone has spats now.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55912041
Nene having sex with (You), half the school and/or with her husbands in a big orgy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55907930

Someone make a greentext of this.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55916853
I can give you a whole scene within a chapter devoted to it, you'll just have to wait a bit.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55918081
You're a beautiful man

[Anonymous No.]

>>55920834
Not as beautiful as Polka though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55916235
Ah. Welp, now I've got a reason...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55923136
>Polka on a cross country trip after kidnapping me and killing my girlfriend

[Anonymous No.]

>>55925622
>She picks up one of her friends at various spots as the trip goes on
>Each one talks to you as if you and Polka have been dating for a while, and know more about you than you would have thought
>Polka has made an elaborate inside joke with her friends about how you and would date one another over some girl's dead body
>Everyone, especially nene thinks this is hilarious.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55841248
My pleasure. https://files.catbox.moe/0x9gxv.png
Gotta grind real hard tomorrow... not sure what I wanna go for. The futa holoadvent stuff people were discussing a couple threads ago was real fun. There is no way the pebble's genmates aren't running a train on her every evening. Look at how Kiara arranged them, she knows.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897790
Fuwawa and Mococo getting left in a hot car during the Advent Road trip.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55927299
What do you think about a drawing of Kobo as HJAnon's daughter? I can't get it out of my head since someone suggested it to the author last thread

[Anonymous No.]

So what fics are you still looking forward to anons?

[Anonymous No.]

>catalog zoomin
>what the fuck is?
>apparently to shiori baiters are at it again with fresh fuel from the holotalk
I fucking hate these subhumans so much.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>55931969
There’s a lot of stories I’m hoping to see continued, but I’m almost certain 90% of them have been dropped. The only one that I think might be continued is Lost and Found, which I’d like to see.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55935298
aw yea that's a cute one. I like where that one is headed too.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897790
Bullying Mel until she gets angry enough to try and suck your blood, only for her jaw to be too weak and her fangs to be too blunt and small to break your skin

[Anonymous No.]

>>55927299
I have now phased through the floor
Thanks, my heart and dick are both super happy

[Anonymous No.]

>>55902800
>Auntie's little secret.
I'll never get over it

[Anonymous No.]

>>55936056
This immediately make me think of her trying to suck your dick in order to sink her teeth in somewhere softer only for you to turn things around and give her a brutal facefucking.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897790
Mel's teeth get itchy and asks you nibble your arm to sate her urges
Then you mouth-rape her because she's built to get raped

[Anonymous No.]

>>55936340
Neither. It still stings..

[Anonymous No.]

>>55936340
Same kinda. It was also going to get to the really good juicy bits as well, no?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55936340
Did I miss something? I thought it was on hiatus.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55937176
If I remember correctly the author lost half his progress and then lost motivation on finishing it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55937176
Anon...
the author dropped it, and all of his other series too

[Anonymous No.]

>>55937176
Yes, the author listed it as a work that would never be finished primarily due to being unable to figure out the ending for it

[Anonymous No.]

>>55937399
>>55937984
Ain't no fucking way. I loved his stuff.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938132
>>52744310

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938191
No...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938191
>the following stories have been dropped until they're updated, no promises.
NTA but that sounds more like indefinite hiatus

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938312
Of course. Just like Kizuna Ai is on an indefinite hiatus.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938332
She'll be back one day, if only to shill the next big internet Ponzi scheme

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938124
Honestly it was less the ending and more about "how do I make a compelling bridge between point A and point B?"
I found myself writing scenes that were basically filler or just more of what was already shown, like stuff I hadn't gone over in the released chapters. I didn't want to just plop into sex scenes, and I had nothing to really build up to it. No matter what I wrote, it didn't feel right. I've fallen into this trap before with TB17A.

This hobby is hell sometimes.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938870
>more like PLAP into sex scenes amirite FELLAS!?


...fellas?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938985
I gleed. Thanks anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938870
I have zero doubt in my mind that the 'filler' content was as compelling as the rest of what you've written, and that you're paralyzed due a perceived inability to write something good enough for your reputaton.
All I can say in this regard is that it's better to finish the damn thing and have it be mediocre than leave it unfinished, but it's up to you.
I sorely hope you try again one day...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55939215
Whoops, I forgot the appropriately cute'n'sexy Fubuki image.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938870
Err, it's hard to see past my own doom and gloom, but I suppose it's also important to remember that what you have written was so incredibly moving that it's gone and provoked such a reaction.
Thanks for that, anon. One could argue that, in a way, you've created the ultimate tragic ending anywho.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55939215
I've caught myself daydreaming of my dropped stories as much as my wips. I lingered on the 'until updated aspect' precisely because I haven't really given up on them. It's just that as of right now, they're boulders I can't move.
>>55939515
>ultimate tragic ending
I'll let you in on a secret
one of the scrapped endings for ALS was fluffy, and written entirely in quotation marks. Make what you will of that

[Anonymous No.]

>>55940249
>I'll let you in on a secret
> one of the scrapped endings for ALS was fluffy, and written entirely in quotation marks.
And the wound's been opened up anew
God damn it, man.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55930959
Not too familiar with that story, I'm afraid. It seems to be quite a dense one so I dunno if I can just jump into anywhere to get an idea of how it goes or if there's some longrunning continuity.
>>55936265
Least I can do.

Way more gassed than I thought today because I could barely sleep last night but I gotta compensate by drawing more here. Hopefully I can actually keep up with these threads, I've been working with a style that should hopefully be fast but also look decent enough

[Anonymous No.]

>>55944461
Kobo ain't even in it yet and likely won't be for a while. The entire story is ongoing and continuous, so jumping in anywhere would probably leave any reader confused as fuck.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938191
It's so over......

[Anonymous No.]

>>55940249
>Ending reveals the entire fic was actually Anon being forced to retell the story of his childhood abuse before getting turned into a bookmark by a mysterious woman.
How does she keep getting away with it?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55933433
>fresh fuel
i find the current "shitposting meta" absolutely fascinating.
You cant squeeze blood out of a stone but they sure are triying
>Mori has done absolutely nothing so her antis are killing themselves on masse
>Tempus shitflinging has died down because they genuinely ran out of ammo
>No one can get anything to stick on Advent because they are very profesional
>Gura is streaaming so her antis are bleeding from the anus
>Kiara schizo constantly fucks up and gets laughed until he gets himself banned
>The Bae anti follows on his steps by triying his one man crusade, fails miserably every day

There's nothing, nada, zich, zero, and somehow they still try to spin any little thing they can into drama, and it backfires constantly so all of catalog is just a bunch of weirdos hallucinating and turning against each other because "my hallucination is true and yours is fake".

[Anonymous No.]

>>55956534
It's kind of just turned into a bunch of numberfagging, which is why numberfagging outside of /#/ should be a bannable offense

[Anonymous No.]

>>55956534
And here I thought WE were the ones supposed to be writing fiction here.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55956534
Hey we can work with that.
A lord of the flies knockoff where the chuubas go without a manager for 1 hour and they turn into blood cultists

[Anonymous No.]

>>55956534
I think at this point the only thing that even has a chance to boil over is the tempus situation but even then that one is burning out of fuel.
Still speaking of rrats, what's a rrat that might be a fun thing to make a fic off of?
Hard mode: no rrat!Ayame.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
most rrats dont leave a lot for writing (mori hates hololive, gura is lazy) but i find the really weird ones to have potential
>The daughter of the crime family, Reine
>Miko raped pekora except the rapist was pekora
>Muslim Kobo

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
Wheelchair Mumei, Yakuza Princess Lamy, Not actually retarded Aqua

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
I have a Lamy yakuza princess story cooking, but I can't say for sure when it'll be done.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55944461
>>55947559
Yeah, it didn't happen yet so you don't need to know the story! There's so many great things coming that I can't wait to see...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
delinquent bully Korone

[Anonymous No.]

>>55959815
I thought the rrat for Reine was that she was an actual princess or am I just heavily misremembering the dumb rrats?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55964430
There are different versions of the rrat. Some have her as part of a crime family. Some have her as the daughter of someone high up in the Indonesian government or the CEO of a big corporation.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
Anya is Yagoo's daughter

[Anonymous No.]

>>55965151
I mean with how much fucking effort went into her 3D debut. I've been pushed into believing that Anya is at least Yagoo's goddaughter.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
Gura taking on the guise of Jap and becoming a godslayer by taking out Omega.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55960438
>Wheelchair Mumei
I love this rrat. After that brief period in her debut it became a completely baseless but the fanfic writer in my mind thinks there's a fun drama fic about trying to hide a crippled girl from management yet still letting her live her dreams.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55967968
If you wanted it to be about the disability being hidden you could invent a doppelgänger for her that does the journeys to Japan and the concerts. Maybe some talents know but keep it secret.

[Anonymous No.]

glum poor severe royal black drafty vacant lamp ceiling stimulate edited slip meddle turn

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
Kiara owns two guns.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
I don't know if it would be "fun", but I am completely convinced of that party being a rich vein to mine for story material.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55968419
Oh god you just reminded me of a Kiara one I saw ages ago that she had killed a woman in a rural combini parking lot in self-defence

[Anonymous No.]

>>55968747
I think there's a hot horror and or smut fic to be made about Gura in that situation as she gets chased around a house by men all chanting "SHARK FUCK! SHARK FUCK! SHARK FUCK!"

[Anonymous No.]

>>55957648
one my favorites is that one about every single thing bae has said or done its "manufactured" and that she's driving up engagement
The idea of her writing in a sticky note "drop your phone in the shower" is really funny

[Anonymous No.]

How would one translate "de gozaru" to English? Or should I just put slap "gozaru" into the story as is?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55970855
>Modify Iroha's speech so she talks in old formal english
>add degozaru at the end of everything
>delete it
>Localize it to "fr fr" or "on god senpai"
those are your choices

[Anonymous No.]

>>55969406
I'm reasonably certain that rrat crops up for everyone at some point. Hell, Chloe got an entire fic using the rrat as a basis "La Fille du Masque". It's a pretty good one-shot.
>>55970855
You have two options here, translate it fully as "I daresay", or just treat it like peko and leave it untranslated. First one only really works if you don't have any japanese in use at all (i.e no senpai/kouhai, no honorrifics). Meanwhile the second option works best if you're treating it like a normal fic and sprinkle in Japanese stuff like that.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55969342
Less horror and more despair porn. Some notes:
>dudebros are invited to the bnb, because they throw the best ragers
>Mori says that they two of them are streamers, which the guys don't recognize because frat guys don't watch vtubers
>Gura doesn't give them her name, so they assume she's a camgirl
>she gets roofied, wakes up getting plowed
>dudes pour into the bedroom because she has a tail and that obviously means she's into freaky shit
>is eventually forced to butt-chug a Smirnoff
>a drunken Mori decides to prove that she's a streamer by going live during the party
>"Where's Gura? I dunno, she could be up to some other... shenanigans, who could say?
Depressing, but a lot more grounded than some other ideas I've had.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55968747
>>55969342
The twist is that the person who organized the rager and brought the guests is Gura, but Mori takes the fall for her because she doesn't want the truth leaking and Gura becoming heartbroken from receiving hate.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55970855
Would you write Okayu to talk like a hick?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55972912
I don't know anon. Much like that 4kids fic I think it would be fun to have a fic that tries to "translate" the accents. Something like
>Iroha talking in old formal English
>Laplus talking in either Shakespearean or Zoomer depending on chuuni level
>Korone talking like she's from Brooklyn
Obviously it would only work in a shitpost but I think there's a fun fic to be made there.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55975638
Korone should be Scottish.

[Anonymous No.]

>this dialogue is terrible
>I can fix it in editing
>this prose sucks
>I can fix it in editing
>this story is hot garbage
>I CAN FIX IT IN EDITING

[Anonymous No.]

>>55976909
I'm sure it's better than you think.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55976909
Better to shit out a first draft and fix it in editing than to never write at all fearing you'll make garbage.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938870
I hate how much I relate to this.

I have a super awesome, bombastic ending planned but the trouble I'm running into is making a compelling track from point A to B without it being uninteresting. If I do it too fast, it won't have the emotional payoff I'm wanting to achieve with it. It's hell.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>55976909
If it makes you feel any better, it would probably look less bad for the readers than it does for you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55981679
Mumei is perfect. I love white women

[Anonymous No.]

>>55938870
>>55979578
Anons, I'm sorry but the only way you can solve this is if you write the rest of your series in one big chunk until you connect points A to B. Then edit them until you can chop them up at relevant stopping points to make the chapters. As fun as releasing stuff serially can be you're both in a situation where the way out is writing it in a way you can edit and revise previous work until you have something you can be satisfied with.

[Anonymous No.]

Not every story can be mouth-shittingly good and it's important to remember that after hours of picking your own brain and slaving over your work looking for the correct words to describe something, you're going to see what you've written as a hundred times worse than what the reader who has nary a clue of your thought train will.
Just fucking finish it. Whatever you're writing. Finish it. Yes, I'm talking to you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55983266
To me?

[Anonymous No.]

Did I stutter?

Yes, you. Finish your damn writing. Worry about whether it's good or not later.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55984242
Actually, he's talking to me

[Anonymous No.]

>>55983266
Amen to that, brother.

[Anonymous No.]

Hey AA, the "Say Can You See" series appears to have been taken down. Still in the hard archive of course

[Anonymous No.]

>>55984345
You can't make me, you can't make me, you can't make me. I will NOT finish the last 10%, I will NOT stop rewriting, I will NOT publish the Google doc. My works will remain in the safety of their in progress womb.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55986566
Man, that's a shame. As much as that series kind of wasted its own potential it had an interesting angle and a weird prose that still made it a fun read... Even if in retrospect the chuuba aspect of that fic was kind of incidental to the story it had, like I could see where he could have fit in character arcs for the chuubas that were present but damn that story kind of rushed past anything that could have made good use of the chuuba characters.

[Anonymous No.]

I am Sam, I am Sam, Sam I am

That Sam sucks dicks, That Sam sucks dicks
I do not like that Sam sucks dicks

Do you like finishing fics?

I do not like that Sam sucks dicks
(Bitch)

Will you write them here or there? Will you write them anywhere?

I won't write them here or there, I won't write them anywhere
I don't like finishing fics, I don't like you Sam sucks dicks

Would you write them in a house? Would you write them with a mouse?

I won't write them in a house, I won't write them with a mouse
Should I punch you in the mouth?

No don't punch me in the mouth

I don't like finishing fics, I don't like you Sam sucks dicks

Do you think I give a damn? Write this shit you fucking man!
Squeeze it from your fucking mind, make you write until you're blind!

Suck MY dick you Sam sucks dicks, go write your own fucking fics
I will not write them with a man, I will not write them with my hand
I will not write them on the moon, I will not write them on a broom
I will not write them in a car, I will not write them in a bar
I will not write them in a box, I will not write them with a fox
I will not write them in the dark, I will not write them in the park
I will not write them with a mouse, now get the fuck out of my house!

[Anonymous No.]

questionably bonsai pin harm overdo

[Anonymous No.]

>>55983266
Thanks anon.
I'll get over my bitching at some point

[Anonymous No.]

>>55983266
>mouth-shittingly good
what the fuck kind of compliment is this?? just why

[Anonymous No.]

I'M GOING TO WRITE A FIC IN WHICH ALL YOU FUCKS FINISH YOUR FICS
AND I'M GOING TO LEAVE IT UNFINISHED

[Anonymous No.]

>>55984345
I banged out 1.5k today, I need rest

[Anonymous No.]

>>55987242
Magnificent.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55983266
Unfortunately that's the only strategy.

I know that Balsa is not going to be even close to as good as I was hoping it would be but I've got to finish writing it in order to learn how to make a better adventure story. I've learned to stop stressing out so much about the poor reception and use it as an opportunity to learn. I can't spend so long worrying about what might be that I don't write it at all. That's probably the greatest lesson I've taken from writing this. A bad story is a stepping stone, not a failure.

[Anonymous No.]

The real sad thing? Even the worst writers here are actually better than 90% of hollywood/game writers. That's a real blackpill.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991031
Aww, you're gonna make me blush.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991031
Yeah but who fucking cares. These are all fan projects made out of love. If any of us wanted to make money of off writing shit on the internet you'd either start taking commisions or seeing if you can make it writing a litrpg/Isekai novel on royalroad.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991513
I mean, if anyone wants to pay me I wouldn't say no...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991612
I'll pay you in sex

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991634
Good idea, Shiori.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991612
You'd have to work on ideas you don't feel like writing, though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991733
Bollocks, I'm just selling the ideas I have anyway. It's a bloody great plan.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991802
It WOULD be a bloody great plan, if not for one major flaw, sire...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991864
You can't call me that, Old Charlie's not gotten around to knighting me yet.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991960
...nobody's going to pay you to write out your own ideas!

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992401
Shite!

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992401
In fairness, Festival of Sensations was something MWanon suggested to his commissioner to write and he got paid to write it.
Admittedly that's an anomaly in the commissioning world but it did happen here.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992580
Ahh, that happened because I didn't have any ideas but still wanted something written. Moreover, I still had a portion of creative control. First pass of FoS ch2 was a stinker, let me tell ya.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992401
This does actually happen though, more often in the art community than writing, but it can be regularly pulled off by popular creators. If you open up one or two commission slots and get a hundred asks, you're bound to find one that either roughly matches something you've brainstormed yourself in the past or speaks to you enough that it gets you in the mood. Granted, no one here is probably big enough to pull that off consistently, but there's always a chance, and it gets more likely if you list out your preferred subject matter.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992683
If only you used that creative control for your other commisionee.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55992771
Hmm.. if you can luck out and find someone whose tastes mirror your own, then sure - that's fair enough. The vast majority of people will not, though.

That's not to say commissions are a one-way ticket to Snoresville, just that sometimes you'll have to write about Polka sex when you'd rather write Choco going swimming.

>>55993001
I do. And those fics satisfy me. That's who they're meant for, after all.

[Anonymous No.]

>Will never fuse with your chuubawives to strike down a bigbad

[Anonymous No.]

>>55993099
If FuwaMoco fused would the fusion be Fuwoco or Mocawa?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55993255
I think it would be called FUWAMOCO.

[Anonymous No.]

It's penis inspection day. Let's see those long and girthy word counts.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
Objectively this Lapras' face is kind of amateurishly drawn, but I really like it for some reason.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
My contest fic. You may already know how long the other thing is.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994378
I think it's because Laplus and by extension holoX was effectively always supposed to be the main cast of a chuuni comedy manga. Her looking fine with a moeblob face is an extension of that.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
>have a whole list of scenes I want to include
>barely halfway through the first one after the intro
This is going to be a god damn behemoth.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55993001
And this is only the first 25% or so. Probably going to be the longest chapter of the book.

[Anonymous No.]

What have you been reading lately anons?
Bonus Question: What's a fic that you've changed your opinions on?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
It's not very girthy or long, but it's what I'm working on. God I hope I can get it done on time.

[Anonymous No.]

I have a microwordcountpenis...

[Anonymous No.]

>>55998294
I'm sure you have a great proseanility

[Anonymous No.]

>>55997285
I've read the rrat!Ayame fics again following the recent discussions. I still agree with the assessment that the main unexplored niche with her is the fightsexual one, especially because of Our Cures.
>Bonus
After enjoying Iofi during the HoloID Cup practice and jerking off to r34 of her I've come to appreciate Extrapedestrial more. It's kind of wholesome in its weirdness.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55998707
>fightsexual
I think I remember that variation on rrat!Ayame. For the most part they act as normal (well normal for the rrat version) because sex just isn't a big deal for Onis but fighting, that's the the key to her heart.
Could probably be a fun Shonen thing, though I'm not sure what setting would best compliment the idea.
Our Cures is making me think highschool. Ayame is the Student Council President that slept her way to the voting booth and you are the delinquent transfer student that has been picking fights with everyone that looks at you funny. Cue multi-chapter Shonen thing where you fight off Ayame's student council consisting of the rest of OKFAMS, until you have to fight Ayame herself. Then after that climactic final battle it ends with her finally falling in love as you start to value this "friendship" thing you've just experienced with the student council... I feel like idea has strayed from being a rrat!Ayame idea.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55999872
I guess that's the more complex, romantic version. I was just thinking of her wanting to fight for fun a lot and having sex with worthy opponents afterwards (in a dominant role if she won, in a submussive role if she lost).

[Anonymous No.]

>>56000061
Oh yeah. That sounds like a much more focused idea. Especially since you can absolutely still do a romance arc with that.
Something like...
>Be cocky young adventurer
>Go after the legendary Oni of Mount Oeyama.
>Get bodied.
>Hard.
>Ayame finds you so pathetic she doesn't even rape you.
Thus starting your quest to get stronger until Ayame acknowledges you and you fight/fuck as equals.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56000529
>you challenge Ayame to a practice fight
>she wins but you felt like you did decently well
>tells you to get naked like she's about to dominate you
>ohyes.jpg
>she just kicks you in the balls, giggles as she steals your pants and leaves because you didn't last long enough

[Anonymous No.]

>>56000061
>challenge Ayame to a fight
>she hears boss music as you draw your sword and becomes wet instantly

[Anonymous No.]

>>56001134
What if the lubrication she used was blood from the wounds caused during the fight?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56001212
Hot

[Anonymous No.]

What chuubas deserve more fics, and what spin would you give them?

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897790
Nerissa finds out her position as Holotori "intern" means serving as an outlet for Kiara's sexual frustrations

[Anonymous No.]

>>55991031
Netflix's homo shows will never hold a candle to Our Cures.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56003723
This, but instead of Kiara it's Reine and she forces Nerissa to wear an orange wig, two hats and to speak in a high pitched voice.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
Somehow it shrank

[Anonymous No.]

>>56004074
You better get it back up and finish.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56001134
Strong fighters would have it quite easy if she jobs on purpose or surrenders once she's too aroused.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56003803
and then reine starts beating the shit out of her because one of the hats fell off

>THE HATS STAY ON DURING SEX

[Anonymous No.]

>>56003584
Koyori and I'd love it if she became the "lab rat" for once and she's been forced to endure whatever sick depraved tests her captors throw at her.
Those sick tests would be gentle cuddling, head patting, intense hand holding, heavy petting, being forced to dress in extreme girly clothes, being forced to mingle with children and have a tea party with them, baby sitting children.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56005316
>forced

[Anonymous No.]

>>56005716
Do you not like it, anon? I actually kinda don't like the last two bits I added but I couldn't think of anything else.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56005809
I'm saying that she'd be happy to do it. Though she would prefer having her own children, of course.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56005838
Such a terrible shame that she'd never be getting children of her own, anon. But Koyori wouldn't be the "only" hag enduring this terrible, terrible fate. Hags like Mio, Lui, Watame would also be enduring this punishment but they would be in different rooms and if they don't comply, they get fucked with a condom on.

[Anonymous No.]

MOOOOOOOODS

[Anonymous No.]

>>56006118
Actually you should slip the pill on them.
Make them think you are triying and its their body who is not up to snuff

[Anonymous No.]

>>56006284
Isn't a condom more effective than the pill, anon? At least the condoms in this prompt are indestructible and no things that poke holes in it will ruin them.
They would get the chance to experience motherhood eventually though. They would just need to endure the "torture" they go through on a daily basis until they are successfully mindbroken (to the captors eyes) and then they get bred raw. And whoever gets to impregnate them has to take responsibility for their actions.
It could have been worse, I could have made them sterile.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56006118
>>56006284
>"ANON! I-Is that...a contraceptive?!"
>FUCK FUCK FUCK
>IT'S A ROOFIE I SWEAR
>Her eyes don't buy it
>"ANON HOW COULD YOU!? I WANTED TO BE YOURS FOREVER!"
then she dies of childlessness and heart break,

[Anonymous No.]

>>56005316
Can't forget the evil belly rubs
Futawa and Moroco gave me the worst fetish for it

[Anonymous No.]

>>56006845
They like bellyrubs? I haven't watched them much outside of collabs.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56007958
They're forbidden because Moco-chan gets "emotional" when you give them to her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56006118
>>56006284
>>56006468
>>56006589
You people should be imprisoned and delivered to /hag/ alive.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56009031
>Come back from work
>Mococo is cooking dinner for you
>Greet het with a kiss and a slap in the butt
>She pouts playfully and tells you dinner's almost ready
>Food is great, as always
>Praise Mococo's cooking. Her tail wags and she blushes as she brushes it off, but you know she likes being praised.
>"You've been a good girl." You mutter, just loud enough for her to hear it
>Tail wagging stops, her cheeks redden deeper
>"How should I reward my hardworking wife?" You teaser her as you get up and walk up to her seat
>Mococo is turned into a mess of autistic sounds as your hand creeps up her back and lands at her ears, giving them a nice rub
>You hear her giggle, and drag your hand slowly towards her delicious midriff
>She swallows as your fingers touch her belly
>Give Mococo a generous belly rub, her leg starts jumping up and down in reflex
>She's babbling and babbling something, trying to stop your hands
>Accidentally, she falls over, but you catch her
>She's laying on her back, with mischievous eyes on her beautiful face
>You caress her cheek and she smiles
>With your finger, you trace a route from her face, through her tits, to her stomach
>Tail wags from side as she feels you reaching her weak point
>Kicks the air as you rub her, drool running down her mouth.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56009159
If you want to make it a punishment for me anon, then make it so I have to breed with either Marine or Botan.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56009440
Oh brother, that is far too cruel a punishment for you. Let me receive it in your stead.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
I'm probably crossing the 15k mark this time

[Anonymous No.]

>>56000529
>Thus starting your quest to get stronger until Ayame acknowledges you and you fight/fuck as equals.
This sounds like it would be the wholesome happy end, where you both give it your all but end up with a draw. You lie on the ground next to each other for a bit to recover, and then start fucking like a love-crazed couple.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55994013
It's coming along. Was pretty busy this weekend and just got back from the renaissance festival. Might try to bang out another k or two tonight on this.
Capcha: JRPG2P

[Anonymous No.]

I've reached 200 pages on my book. Longest book I've ever written in my life

[Anonymous No.]

>>56013270
Mine has reached 97. 95 of those are just me having sex with Mio

[Anonymous No.]

>>56014085
What's the other 2 pages for?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56014085
Yo can I study under you? That sounds godlike. I'll give you 20 pages of smut if you'll let me be your apprentice.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56014284
The title page and the epilogue

[Anonymous No.]

>>56014085
Criminally based

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897705
A Predator's Touch, A Hazy Yellow Line (Part 4)
https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vRcvehOWvdN1muInIUlkyHywne02DCjphnfL0P-Lew_9lVDGFYQsXgrJWUbe0JvRG3ne3xjwDZnl4Kg/pub
Tags: Subaru, Ame, Koyori, Botan, SFW, drama
I know it's pretty late into the thread, but I finally managed to hammer this out and didn't feel like delaying any longer. I'm already eight months behind schedule. Hope you guys enjoy, and as always, feedback is appreciated.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56016094
Based "immediate" delivery, Anon! So glad the series is getting continued, and it hasn't let up in quality.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56016094
Anon's series of misadventures continue. I'm happy to see this series back

[Anonymous No.]

Fanfics up!

[Anonymous No.]

>>56021484
Writing motivation is low bros. My fanfic is not getting up. I'm pretty bushed and almost want to just veg out.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56021729
Sounds like a good time to read and get inspired!

[Anonymous No.]

>>56016094
Man I have no clue what's happening with this plot anymore desu. I reread the chapter prior to this and I'm still lost.
Still it's nice to see this series back, I remember it having a really good and tense plot... Even if I can't recall it right now.

[Anonymous No.]

>>55997285
I just finished Cover High after putting off god knows what reason and I gotta say, I really should have read this earlier. This shit was S-tier, especially those last 3 chapters, which made me feel a range of emotions; also a tab bit too relatable in a certain part. It was great.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56018863
>>56019431
I'm glad you think that, it's good to finally work on this series again. This part would've been out a week after the previous one had I not fallen into the trap of over-complicating the plot and procrastinating.
>>56023124
That's partly the point, I'm trying to keep the explanations for the events hidden or at most vaguely hinted at, then eventually have them under a spotlight possibly by the next chapter.
> I remember it having a really good and tense plot
T-Thanks.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56016094
I’ll go reread the series now. Wait for me, Anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56028486
Of course, Anon.

[Anonymous No.]

*Lick*
Live!

[Anonymous No.]

How kinky would Koyori be if actually given sex? Most I got so far is that she would just ride relentlessly and probably use some cool purple drink to give you boners for more than 4 hours.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037126
>Koyori doses you with MDMA and lets you experience the most mind-shattering orgasm you've ever had

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037126
If you still remember that Koyori anal sex brain drain outline... I think something like that would be how far she'd fall.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037770
>whikle high out of this dimension, cum to the natural conclusion that the meaning of life is to love
>You sure as hell found meaning with the girl next to you

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037126
She might want to do sexperiments with all kinds of fetishes.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037126
she would be actually really nervous and paralized with choice, requiring you to take initiativealso nervous about anything except missionary

[Anonymous No.]

>>56040338
>>56040290
The duality of dogfuckers

[Anonymous No.]

give me your strongest _Mori_ prompts

[Anonymous No.]

>>56041574
A comedy fic where Mori__ performs CBT on you with the narration being dead serious but she still speaks like it's a normal stream (though perhaps you might exaggerate it for effect).

[Anonymous No.]

>>56042363
>I can put this thing so deep in your dick hole, my dude! That's crazy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56042363
>Holy shit he took another kick to the balls deadbeats, that's crazy! big ups!

[Anonymous No.]

>>56041574
There's was something somebody suggested like a year and a half ago where __Mori__ is your older sister who used to treat you like shit because you were blind and she always hated you being her responsibility, but later after (You) graduate highschool and are kind of a shut-in loser with no prospects for the future, she's become super successful and feels terrible about the way she treated you. I've kind of always wanted to do something with it myself but aside from a few dramatic scenes and inevitable incest I didn't really know where to take it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56037126
Koyori is the embodiment of sex and would have no qualms of having a long 12 hour marathon sex if given the chance

[Anonymous No.]

>>56041574
Mori gets carried by the rest of Myth, one person per limb, and they dump her into a woodchipper. Stock prices for Cover soar sky high and the cure for breast cancer is found.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56044879
Tits like that don't belong on a dog

[Anonymous No.]

>>56045714
They belong in my mouth

[Anonymous No.]

>>56044879
I can see her feeding her assistants aphrodisiacs and being excited to see what they'll do to her after teasing them.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56044158
>Mori runs away from home when you are in middleschool because she doesnt want to deal with her cripple brother
>you and mamamori get by. Forced to be more independant
>get into ASMR and Zatsu streamers because its content you can enjoy without watching
>ENTER
there you have a base, with the story being about reconnecting...and incest

[Anonymous No.]

>write on my phone 5K words
>open the document on my pc, its not there
>open on my phone, its gone
This is shitty AND spooky

[Anonymous No.]

>>56050104
Anon. I don't think you saved it on your phone.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56050181
IT WAS THERE, IT SAVED

[Anonymous No.]

>>56043916
I thought sounding was a different thing than CBT? Then again, I am no expert.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56044158
What is it about Mori and Suisei that make them the target for incest?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56050247
Sounding definitely qualifies as cock torture. Unless you got a wide urethra, I suppose. But I really hate that it's attached to an otherwise interesting genre, like how much femdom involves pegging ffs.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56051592
Autistic dorks who are known to still be softies. Plus they both tend to be driven perfectionists so having this insanely indulgent taboo 'flaw' they have to keep a secret is enticing. At least, that's how I see it having written incest fics for them both

[Anonymous No.]

>>55897705
Decided to finish this cuz I was bored. Tried using an extension to add vine booms every time a moai is mentioned but that didn't work. In the end I decided to add a hyperlink to a very spicy image of Fubuki made by pic related. Enjoy.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vSUXu5o00sy2U_g58S6FjYQIe-twOh5nnm6pCm3pmqCgWG47Gt2DU2EtEHO9rGJ3uhuSFq7y8aTfJVS/pub

Tags: NSFW, Choco, Bijou, Comedy

[Anonymous No.]

>>56052611
Aimless comedy tends to not be that funny, and when your best joke is lying and hyperlinking goatse it works even less

[Anonymous No.]

>>56052611
Anon I think I've said this every time you've posted a new comedy fic but you really need to let these cook in the oven more. I know your 'style' is to throw as many jokes as you can into a fic and hope it turns out funny in the end but instead of coming out as a flurry of jokes a lot of your comedy fics just end up being a bunch of half baked jokes thrown out with the hope that one of them will make the reader have a light chuckle.
...
Also if you wanted to do the moai vine boom thing you could have just manually inserted a hyperlink to the vine boom sound to each mention and just called it a day.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56053611
That's a good point. I think I fixated on using an extension too much.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56052611
Goatse... was funny 20 years ago. Not anymore.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56050247
It can be its own thing. But it can really hurt and is emasculating, so it's a good fit for CBT.
>>56051765
What do you prefer?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56050245
That's why writing apps that autosave shit have always been lifesavers for me.

[Anonymous No.]

Who's the CBT holo? For me it's Coco, with Kanata assisting.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56014085
Yo when is it out?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56058997
Rule of thumb, nothing that isn't readable (yet) exists. That way you won't get dissapointed by writers dropping their WIPs or making something up.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56060375
>Rule of thumb, nothing that isn't readable (yet) exists. That way you won't get dissapointed by writers dropping their WIPs

To beat a dead horse most viciously...

THEN WHY DOES ALS BEING DROPPED HURT SO MUCH?

Huh?

Tell me why. Tell me why right now.
AND how I can stop it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56061291
That's fair, I should have said that you can't expect anything to come into existence in the future either.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56061291
Because you want closure on a story you liked.
Of course you can fix this yourself. After all, nothing is stopping you from writing your own fan sequel.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56062393
Fine. I will.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56062723
>And so anon set off on a grand quest to write a fan chapter where Fubuki kidnaps her nephew and dies crashing her car into a lake while giving him road head.
Good luck anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56062830
What I'm thinking of is a little more wild. It'll be a happy ending for everyone involved, though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56062830
That is an exquisite Fubuki.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56062963
Come on, it's not fun if no one suffers

[Anonymous No.]

>>56057975
Despite the jokes earlier, it'll always be Mori for me due to that one holofantasy fan chapter.

[Anonymous No.]

Fanfics up?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56052611
Honestly i was liking it at first. The conspiracy bit was overblown a bit but it was decent. Hell i laughed at the monkey.
However after that it completely hits rock bottom, the serious but fun narration evaporates, the jokes become rapidfire and none except the ff14 lands... Only for the ending to be a copout.
I feel like if you worked on that first bit, of making it overly serious and having an Internal logic, it would rule

[Anonymous No.]

>>56016094
I just noticed that the series link to this isn't on the main archive. It has up to part 5 of the dreams part but Hazy Yellow Line isn't listed, nor is the link to the full series.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56066186
It's listed normally on the rentry page. I think it might be an issue that came from an editing mistake while AA was messing with the spreadsheet that actually runs the script archive since the two are basically parallel to each other despite archiving links to the same stuff.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56064499
Yes, fanfics up.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56064499
Fanfics... neutral.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56067287
Just like my cock right now

[Anonymous No.]

What's the coolest action sequence from a story here? I need to refresh my fight scenes.

[Anonymous No.]

So what chuubas do you think you write best anon?
If you're bumping at least do it with a question or some horny idea that's been living in your head.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56041574
The strongest Mori prompt is already on the archive and is the one about both of you not being together until a kid comes

[Anonymous No.]

>>56068701
Why would you need a kid to orgasm for you to get together?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56068519
>The Hero's Fall
If you want to make some chuuni action shit take some notes from this fic. While the, for lack of a better word, skill popups feel very gamey they're woven in so that it adds to the fic rather than take you out.
>Dark Medicine
Really good one-shot though the action does kind of fall apart in the latter half.
>Death for Death
This is more of a comedy but I remember this as the fic where you fought Mori with a mall katana and I just rereread it to see if it's a good action fic. It kind of is but it's like 80% comedy. You should read it though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56069162
Er, well I'm grateful for the mention since I wrote two of those, but I'm not sure if rereading my own fics would help. I'll give The Hero's Fall another read though, I recall reading a while ago but it never left a big impression.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56068587
Civia/Ciyana and, probably whenever I get to writing them, FuwaMoco. I also write Flare and Sora kinda ok, but I haven't got them down perfect.

Civia was my first oshi so I know her the best. I miss her a lot.

[Anonymous No.]

I'll get to baking if nobody else has already started.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56069731
I see....
At least this means you already know how to make a good action fic
Please don't tell me you also wrote Heartbreak Tokyo I was about to put that as the fourth recomendation but I stopped since putting in a series seemed a bit too wide.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070003
Nah, HBT isn't me. I've only read chapter one so far, it's been on my reading list. I'll find some time to look through it for sure.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56064211
The only one who deserves to "suffer" is that psychopathic mother who doesn't love (You).

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070182
Hana
>Scolded her child a couple of times because he was being a fucking twat
Fubuki
>Groomed and sexually abused a little troubled boy for her own sexual gratification, leaving him scarred for life

Foobs is going to hell

[Anonymous No.]

>>56068587
I struggle with writing most chuubas, because I end up second guessing every line of dialogue they have, or end up wondering how I can add "spice" to their interactions when they seem too normal. If I had to say, I think I'm doing at ok job with Shion, she laughs at the drop of a hat on stream so I've been including a lot of witch giggles. There haven't been many chances for her teasing, though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070542
NTA but whilst I definitely agree Foobs is going straight to hell in that universe, Hanna is a poor excuse for a human being. Selfish and vindictive with little if any love for her offspring; naught but an obligation. Anon's going to grow up with a lot of serious character flaws under her hand.
Mind you, he's going to be damaged by Fubuki too, but at least that way two people are happy!

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070542
All the boy wanted anon was a bit of love. Something his mother should have given him instead of neglecting him and then cutting out the only adult that cared about him in his life.
in a way, I'm relieved ALS has been dropped. It would have given me more reason to hate Hana and wishing all the hateful stuff upon her for being such a shitty mother.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070697
>in a way, I'm relieved ALS has been dropped.
Take it back.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070542
Hana never taught Anon how to fucking read. Fubuki's no saint, but don't go pretending she's worse.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070728
Hate to give Hana any form of credit, but y'know.
Fubuki's a child molester in this universe. She's automatically scum.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070722
What am I suppose to do, anon? I need to hate a character that does no exist and because the series has been dropped, I cannot wish hateful stuff upon her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070805
I can't believe you'd be glad a series was dropped over something so petty.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070845
Blame the author not me, anon. If he never made such a hateful character then I would be genuinely sad (I still kinda am but now I feel empty) that such a great series had been dropped.
I kinda somewhat hate Fubuki's husband as well (although not as much as I hate Hana). How "dare" he not believe his wife over his scummy sister who doesn't even care about her own son.

[Anonymous No.]

Freshly baked >>56070774
I guess we’re not doing the story thing, but I swear I’m human.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071060
Tell me about Ayame. Why is she so happy about forks?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071240
Because they are the superior tool for eating over primitive wooden sticks. She is happy you saved her from a life of being a cavewoman.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070804
>in this universe

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071442
She's only a loli/shotacon in real life. She... probably isn't a molester.

Probably.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071240
She's talking about their possible applications in the bedroom. This version of Ayame gets incredibly turned on by seeing you bleed, and can even cum from just the sight of your blood if the conditions are right.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071586
Fightsexual, rrat or a fusion of both?

[Anonymous No.]

>>56068519
Holofantasy vs. Mori was a fun fight to imagine. Vs. Ollie was good for that too.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071761
NTA, but it sounds very much like a subtype of rrat!Ayame (which, in /wg/, is mostly defined by her horniness at this point). And if it's just the blood it's not really the fightsexual subtype of rrat!Ayame anymore, though it is adjacent.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070166
You should, that fic's fight scenes only get better with each chapter.
>>56071784
It's funny how the fanchapter and the actual chapter had the fight go completely differently with the only constant being that it was one-sided.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071586
If you're a man of courage you'll let her use Rasetsu and Asura, not some stupid fork.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56070992
Kenji did nothing wrong

[Anonymous No.]

>>56072099
Yeah I think at some point we've kind of flanderized the rrat to be more appealing. Sanding off the lazy whore parts to focus more on her being a ravenous Horny Oni (that's racist against koreans). Which I think mostly comes from Our Cures doing the pragmatic thing in regards to adapting rrat!ayame to the setting while still keeping her a symphathetic heroine.
>>56072254
I know what you mean by this but this is just making me imagine Ayame using her swords to do house work, i.e. butchering, preparing and eating stuff.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071784
Holofantasy is the shit for swordfights and magic, I agree. I've already read through the whole thing, but I might review it in more detail.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56072689
HoloJourneys has a heavy dosing of magical swordfights too. It might have been just fists and claws, but the Botan fight pretty intense and a little brutal.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56072663
Rrat!Ayame being lazy was the punchline of That's a Paddlin', but when I reworked and expanded it into A Hedonist's Reckoning I also went with a more sympathetic ojou - because I want to write about having an enthusiastic and good-hearted partner, not a horny whore. I'm also hesistant about Korean jokes because it might fall flat for or even offend the Korean readers.
But it's not like the original rrat!Ayame has been erased if anyone wants to write about her, so I don't mind the expansion of the character for /wg/ purposes.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56072663
>Ayame using her swords to do house work, i.e. butchering, preparing and eating stuff.
I've never seen a clearer mental image in my head before. I can imagine her singing "Yaa~ yaa~ ya yaa~ while dancing and lazily swinging her dual swords around to cut up a large chunk of meat into uneven pieces.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073032
>But it's not like the original rrat!Ayame has been erased if anyone wants to write about her, so I don't mind the expansion of the character for /wg/ purposes.
This reads like you're claiming ownership of the rrat!Ayame idea.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073138
I'm not, to be clear. rrat!Ayame is a product of the rrat magic /here/ - but anyone can have an opinion on flanderization of a character being positive/neutral/negative.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073032
I mean I do like the way we've flanderized her... hell it's kind of a weird character rerailment since the further you go from pure rrat the more you kind of have to go back to pulling from ayame's real character.
Though I do think it would be nice to have a pure rrat!ayame fic again... Even if I'm pretty sure the only angles to explore are the fightsexual one or going deeper with the lazy whore thing

[Anonymous No.]

>>56071521
Of course she isn't. It's all for show, I'm sure if she was left to care for a little boy I would never touch him.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073405
>I mean I do like the way we've flanderized her... hell it's kind of a weird character rerailment since the further you go from pure rrat the more you kind of have to go back to pulling from ayame's real character.
Definitely, but after the recent discussions I'm also interested in the lore direction. My Japanese isn't perfect and I've only been watching her since 2020, but overall Ayame never went into or expanded her lore much apart from verbal stuff (classics like yodayo or calling us ningensamatachi) and the theming of some streams, songs etc. But the glimpses of lore!Ayame we get from the Yamato Phantasia manga are very intriguing to me.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073996
Honestly with how Ayame acts, I'm pretty sure lore!ayame would just be the same normal bubbly ayame dressed up with the history of where she lived; either mount oeyama of alternative or the underworld if we go by normal lore.
>>56073881
>I would never touch him.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56073881
Please let me have sex with you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>56074354
I have to admit that I'm kind of a sucker for demons from the underworld and more "western" demonic traits, even if they don't traditionally belong to Japanese oni. I'm trying to find a compromise, but as long as I'm writing for a western rather than a Japanese audience I don't mind it too much.

[Anonymous No.]

Last for foobsex

[Anonymous No.]